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    I Was Told There'd Be Cake
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    I Was Told There'd Be Cake
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    I Was Told There'd Be Cake
    Audiobook6 hours

    I Was Told There'd Be Cake

    Published by Penguin Random House Audio

    3.5/5

    ()

    Currently unavailable

    Currently unavailable

    About this audiobook

    Wry, hilarious, and profoundly genuine, this debut collection of literary essays is a celebration of fallibility and haplessness in all their glory. From despoiling an exhibit at the Natural History Museum to provoking the ire of her first boss to siccing the cops on her mysterious neighbor, Crosley can do no right despite the best of intentions-or perhaps because of them. Together, these essays create a startlingly funny and revealing portrait of a complex and utterly recognizable character that's aiming for the stars but hits the ceiling, and the inimitable city that has helped shape who she is. I Was Told There'd Be Cake introduces a strikingly original voice, chronicling the struggles and unexpected beauty of modern urban life.
    LanguageEnglish
    PublisherPenguin Random House Audio
    Release dateJun 3, 2008
    ISBN9781436228060
    Unavailable
    I Was Told There'd Be Cake

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    Reviews for I Was Told There'd Be Cake

    3.5/5

    771 ratings64 reviews

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    • 4/5
      Humorous autobiographical essays. I particularly enjoyed her experiences as a Jew at Christian summer camp. Not much to say, to be honest. I'd read another book by her if I came across it, but I don't know that I'd actively seek it out.
    • 2/5
      I get that this came out 8 years ago, so it's harsh to look at it through 2016 eyes. And yet. 2008 was still 4 years after Sex in the City went off the air (and at least 6 since it went off the boil). Ms Crosley can write. I laughed out loud at least twice. And yet. Just because you can do something doesn't mean you should. This is a collection of so much sub-Carrie Bradshaw inconsequentiality. She can write. I may read her again, although I'll try her novel before another set of essays. This was disappointing.
    • 2/5
      meh.

      I'm not her demographic, I guess. OK stories, but way too long and rambly, though the butterfly exhibit one was entertaining.
    • 3/5
      Let’s face it. When it comes to personal essays there are some real heavy hitters in the world that other writers must be willing to be compared to. It may well be unfair to hold anyone to the standards of, say, David Sedaris or Sarah Vowel. But, unfair or not, the comparisons will happen.And, it is with that same expectation that I approach any collection of essays. I am looking for entertainment, absorption, humor, skilled weaving of a story, and a desire to read more and more.This collection comes close…oh, so close. And yet, sorry, not quite there. Or, another way of putting it – this is a nice collection, but nothing more. It didn’t live up to the perhaps-too-lofty expectations I brought with me.Ms. Crosley’s writing is good. She tells a good story, she blends various thoughts and plot lines together, and she has just enough of a sideways look at what is occurring in her life to shine a different light on things. But through all of it, I just couldn’t bring myself to be entertained or (perhaps worse) feel invested in what was happening. The result was (and this will come out meaner than I mean it to be, but it’s all I can think of right now) it felt like someone moaning about first-world problems.Now, a quick warning, that is just my take on it. (After all, that is what reviews are all about.) I have the feeling I was bringing something else to the party with which others will not be burdened. I feel like I should have liked these better than I did.And, actually, I can’t say I disliked these. However, I never felt the reading to be compelling or for the material to draw me in with anything but a disinterested bystander’s interest.And when it was done, there was a slight distaste. Like I had made a visit that just wasn’t a great as I had hoped it would be. To the point where I didn’t want to make that trip again.Note that, after reading this book, I took a look back and realized that I had read one of Ms. Sloane’s other books as a part of the early reviewer program. And, while the review is different than this one, I was saying much the same thing back then. I can’t tell you what I didn’t like; I just can’t find any reason to rave.
    • 5/5
      Oh yes! What an enjoyable summer beach read.
    • 5/5
      very funny
    • 2/5
      I'm officially giving this book a 2.5 stars rating. It is a book of short stories about Sloane Crosley's life, but I just wasn't crazy about it. I listened to the audio book read by her, and I really liked her voice and reading style. But the stories kind of tended to run on and tell things that really didn't pertain to the story. I really wanted to like it, but just didn't :(
    • 3/5
      so-so review...some short stories were better than others.
    • 3/5
      I wouldn't rush out to borrow or buy this volume. If you enjoy this kind of humor, try Augustin Burroughs. Some of the essays are funny and telling; most are just so-so.
    • 3/5
      Funny overall...the story about The Oregon Trail deserves 5 stars!
    • 2/5
      I really wanted to like this book more. Sloane Crosley has many, many funny sentences in this collection of essays, but the overall essays are structured with flashbacks within flashbacks, making them hard to follow and difficult to become involved in. She goes off on tangents involving imaginary conversations and leaves the reader to figure out what she imagined and what actually happened, and by the time I got to the end I'm afraid it just felt like too much work.
    • 2/5
      Rather disappointing collection of essays, especially after all the buzz I'd heard about this book. She had me laughing at a few places, but most of the stories felt either flat or forced.
    • 3/5
      Sloane Crosley has an entertaining voice, but on the whole her essays tend to have more words than either ideas or incidents. While she might be one of the more entertaining guests at the party, that doesn't mean her stories have that much more substance than those of any other intelligent, articulate, but largely untested young American. Other contemporary essayists like David Sedaris or David Rakoff are able to take sometimes slight subjects and to animate them with greater urgency and wit. Barring a development of style, one might hope that something truly interesting happens to Crosley so she can relate tales a bit meatier than the origin of her first name, her most dreadful NYC apartment move, or her brush with an almost-serious illness. As someone else observed of the book, it is very much like listening to a friend tell stories over drinks at a bar. That might be a lure for some, but while drinking can do wonders to elevate overlong stories into amusing anecdotes, it more often impairs one's comprehension while reading.
    • 2/5
      I found Crosley's writing only very mildly funny, which is a big problem in a book of supposedly humorous essays. Most of the subject matter didn't seem particularly noteworthy, and the author came across as the average spoiled kid from the NYC suburbs. On the other hand, I definitely felt compelled to keep reading.
    • 3/5
      It's funny to see so many people have expressed here that they are envious of Crosley's book deal at such a young age. The essays are certainly about things that we in our 20s and 30s have complained and wondered about: the strange behavior of Americans in high school, the obsession with weddings, the horrendously abusive and low-paying publishing industry, and so on. Crosley has a humorous approach to it all (I can only imagine those who did not find it humorous were jealous or dumb!) and her innocence (also known as "stupidity due to young age and inexperience with life") is hilarious.

      It's strange that people have expressed a "So what?" sentiment towards this book, when most of the other well-known writers who write about stuff like this, like Sedaris, can also equally deserve such a response. The so-what of it is that, well, it's someone's life. Don't read it if you are looking for profound messages (that's what Hollywood films are for, no?!) And to the people who thought the essays were more like blog entries: you know how lit agents find "real life experience" writers about certain subjects (here it would be "the life of 20somethings in New York")? They look through blogs. Yes, yes, they do. And when they find those blogs that are well-written, well-read, and interesting, they see if the blogger wants to turn it into a book (that's one way it happens, at least.) So why be so bitter that Crosley here didn't here to endure all that and got herself a book deal right off the bat? Good for her!

      Now, if she can write a real novel with all this "life experience" she has had, with real characters and all, that will be great. Or she can just simply remain on the personal essay format forever, but she will have to either have some real life problems to write about or deal with the jealous mob out there.
    • 3/5
      Pretty funny - especially if you live in NYC!
    • 3/5
      I had such high expectations for this book, given the effusive praise on the back cover, but it didn't really live up to those expectations. Not uproariously funny, not tear-jerking, more of "huh".
    • 3/5
      I saw a reference to this book, and it looked clever, and I liked the title, so I picked it up. Unfortunately, this collection of memoir essays did not hold my interest. The writing felt a little too contrivedly self-conscious, and the book just didn't make me laugh. Maybe I didn't relate to the narrator? (Actually, her voice very much reminded of a completely different book -- an urban fantasy novel about a young lawyer in a big "white fang" NYC law firm filled with vampires: This Case Is Gonna Kill Me, by Phillipa Bornikova. That one didn't hold my interest either.)Maybe your mileage would vary, but this one didn't work for me.
    • 5/5
      I've come to love the charming slice-of-life style memoir. Not the self-indulgent, likely ghost written kind put out by famous celebrities. I crave outlandish stories of everyday life, narrated by a snarky, but ultimately well-meaning voice that reminds me of my inner monologue. This collection is elegant and thoroughly entertaining. Several times I laughed out loud in public like a crazy person. Worth it!
    • 2/5
      Adult nonfiction; short stories/memoir. Sloane Crosley is a funny woman, but she's not that funny (certainly nowhere near David Sedaris, as other reviewers seem to want to compare her to). I listened to a few discs of the audiobook but decided that I'd much prefer to listen to music instead of actually finishing the rest.
    • 4/5
      At first I loved these essays. They are for the most part intelligent, with just the right amount of snark. Then they began to wear on me a bit. Perhaps they are like bakery cake: they should be spaced out and savored as the occasional treat, not gorged on.
    • 3/5
      Did this one as an audio book, read by the author. It was a snarky memoir a la Jen Lancaster -- a Gen X (Y?) account of various incidents in her young life (20s) that would've been more entertaining if they weren't so mean or had some semblance of self-deprecation. From dealing with a Bridezilla to the inconvenience of volunteering, life lessons are learned, but they all seem to return to an ego-centric outlook.
    • 1/5
      “I was told there’d be cake”Sloane Crosley.. we had such high hopes for you.reading your pony story in radar, it seemed that reading your book was an awesome idea. if something makes you smile that much and it is only a single chapter from a book.. the rest MUST be excellent… right?no. couldn’t have been more wrong.when this book was first purchased, i was very pleased to read the pony story again. i imagined with horror the looks your family would give, when stumbling across your plastic pony corral in the kitchen drawer.chapter 2 and three were some of the most unappealing collections of vowels and consonants i have read in ages. frankly, your book bored me so much, that after three chapters, i put it down and decided to forget about it, altogether.something like a year has gone past. i felt a bit bad for you. on a sad and pathetic whim, i said “give sloane another chance.. she did make you laugh once.. perhaps she could do it again” i have been wrong in the past. i have read part of a book, been bored, picked it back up and had a better experience with a different mind set.this was not the case with “i was told there’d be cake”. every single chapter was filled with bland anecdotes and sprawling in-effective prose. each story waddles back and forth like a drunken semi-retarded penguin, straying from topic to topic in a shoot from the hip manner.. but with a drunken semi-retarded penguin instead of a cowboy.. heh.. waddle… you are left staring at the pages wishing you had SOMETHING else to do. it took me two weeks to drag my ass through this book, opting to talk to strangers on public transit in an effort to distract myself..this book is “too shy” by kajagoogoo.. the first chapter is sloane’s one hit wonder. everything else in between front and back cover is nothing but filler hoping beyond hope to become a cult hit or the elusive and desired “deep cut”..in my view, you failed.what you did well? you market things.. you book was pushed in a phenomenal manner. marketing is definitely your thing.. i have heard so many people talking about their interest in your collection of essays. unfortunately, none of them had read it before spouting off about it.the thing i regret the most is the awful feeling i get when people i know are found with this in there hands and the disappointed look in their eyes.leave the writing to the monkeys who are recreating Shakespeare on typewriters--xpost RawBlurb.com
    • 4/5
      I Was Told There'd Be Cake by Sloane Crosley is her debut memoir in the form of a collection of essays. I listened to this audio after having read her second collection, How Did You Get This Number.Crosley writes almost stream of consciousness type musings on moments of her life — or on things she would like to happen with her life. She opens with how she'd like to have a child in Europe and uproot him or her to the States. There's another section where she describes being sent to a Christian camp by her clueless Jewish parents every summer.And there's a lot of just so-so stuff that falls into the category of wacky, off-putting memoirs. I think the salient bits of these essays could be reworked into a graphic novel style memoir. In that regard, I would recommend this book to anyone who has enjoyed Little Fish by Ramsey Beyer or Lucky by Gabrielle Bell.
    • 1/5
      “I was told there’d be cake”Sloane Crosley.. we had such high hopes for you.reading your pony story in radar, it seemed that reading your book was an awesome idea. if something makes you smile that much and it is only a single chapter from a book.. the rest MUST be excellent… right?no. couldn’t have been more wrong.when this book was first purchased, i was very pleased to read the pony story again. i imagined with horror the looks your family would give, when stumbling across your plastic pony corral in the kitchen drawer.chapter 2 and three were some of the most unappealing collections of vowels and consonants i have read in ages. frankly, your book bored me so much, that after three chapters, i put it down and decided to forget about it, altogether.something like a year has gone past. i felt a bit bad for you. on a sad and pathetic whim, i said “give sloane another chance.. she did make you laugh once.. perhaps she could do it again” i have been wrong in the past. i have read part of a book, been bored, picked it back up and had a better experience with a different mind set.this was not the case with “i was told there’d be cake”. every single chapter was filled with bland anecdotes and sprawling in-effective prose. each story waddles back and forth like a drunken semi-retarded penguin, straying from topic to topic in a shoot from the hip manner.. but with a drunken semi-retarded penguin instead of a cowboy.. heh.. waddle… you are left staring at the pages wishing you had SOMETHING else to do. it took me two weeks to drag my ass through this book, opting to talk to strangers on public transit in an effort to distract myself..this book is “too shy” by kajagoogoo.. the first chapter is sloane’s one hit wonder. everything else in between front and back cover is nothing but filler hoping beyond hope to become a cult hit or the elusive and desired “deep cut”..in my view, you failed.what you did well? you market things.. you book was pushed in a phenomenal manner. marketing is definitely your thing.. i have heard so many people talking about their interest in your collection of essays. unfortunately, none of them had read it before spouting off about it.the thing i regret the most is the awful feeling i get when people i know are found with this in there hands and the disappointed look in their eyes.leave the writing to the monkeys who are recreating Shakespeare on typewriters--xpost RawBlurb.com
    • 3/5
      This collection of essays is good but nothing spectacular. It's a quick read that stays on an even keel, never slipping and becoming boring but never really taking off either. One of the essays is about her childhood in suburbia and how we've managed to create a whole generational subset with all the same viewpoints and memories simply because they were never exposed to anything else and part of me has to wonder if maybe she hasn't quite gotten as far away from that as she thinks.
    • 1/5
      I bailed out after 3 essays. The authorial voice didn't hold my interest, there wasn't anything terribly fresh about the subject matter, and the writing struck me as mundane.
    • 3/5
      Listened to from Jul 11-17, 2012There were a few laugh out loud moments with this one, but I was always so perplexed with how the essays ended. Sometimes they would manage to wander back to the point Crosley started with and occasionally I felt like an essay just ENDED.Worth a read though and I look forward to listening to her next book. Crosley definitely does a great job narrating her own essays.
    • 1/5
      Just not for me. Perhaps I need more girl in me but I failed to find anything worth reading in this. Maybe I am too old and can't get into all the giggling. I tried. I did. The fact that Jonathan Lethem and his adoring crowd all found the book so great should have been a better sign for me. Denial, that is what it is for me, the reason for my looking. And the need always to find new literature, new writing, that knocks me off my feet. But this isn't it, not even close. I never read a Nancy Drew book, but this is what it felt like to me. Or maybe I have been listening to Johnny Cash talk and sing too much of late. Whatever the reason, an experiment gone bad.
    • 3/5
      Eh. Liked it enough to keep listening, though I wouldn't have been too bothered if it had disappeared off my ipod. I was under the impression it would be funnier, but it didn't even seem like it was trying for humor--it had a droll wit, which I appreciated, but it wasn't really laugh-out-loud, side-splitting humor. I wouldn't mind hanging out with her for an afternoon, though; she seems okay.