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    Games People Play: The Basic Handbook of Transactional Analysis
    Games People Play: The Basic Handbook of Transactional Analysis
    Games People Play: The Basic Handbook of Transactional Analysis
    Audiobook6 hours

    Games People Play: The Basic Handbook of Transactional Analysis

    Written by Eric Berne

    Narrated by David Colacci

    3.5/5

    ()

    About this audiobook

    Over forty years ago, Games People Play revolutionized our understanding of what really goes on during our most basic social interactions. More than five million copies later, Dr. Eric Berne's classic is as astonishing and revealing as it was on the day it was first published.

    We play games all the time-sexual games, marital games, power games with our bosses, and competitive games with our friends. Detailing status contests like "Martini" (I know a better way), to lethal couples combat like "If It Weren't For You" and "Uproar," to flirtation favorites like "The Stocking Game" and "Let's You and Him Fight," Dr. Berne exposes the secret ploys and unconscious maneuvers that rule our intimate lives.

    Explosive when it first appeared, Games People Play is now widely recognized as the most original and influential popular psychology book of our time. It's as powerful and eye-opening as ever.
    LanguageEnglish
    PublisherTantor Media, Inc
    Release dateApr 19, 2011
    ISBN9781452671796
    Games People Play: The Basic Handbook of Transactional Analysis

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    Reviews for Games People Play

    3.5/5

    405 ratings21 reviews

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    • 5/5
      one of my formative books
    • 4/5
      A brilliantly helpful book to navigate the world, much more so than the self-help ones.
    • 5/5
      When I first approached this book ., I haven't finish it., I simply didn't get it it was boring for me, then I took mini online course on transactional analysis I fell in love with this structure because you can implement it in any life scenario: corporate, relationships, school . So now I will rate it accordingly.
    • 5/5
      Excellent book. The reader does not get in the way, which is good, but I feel he could have performed better with conveying the appropriate tones and inflections such that convey the humor as well as the implied emotion, of which mostly all are short phrasal exclamations, as opposed to just short phrases….they all are exclamations that exemplify the epitome of the emotional role of the agents and responders.
      Anyway, the book is sooo great…i wish i had read it earlier in life. Some games are a bit outdated, but most are on the nose for todays society and i am sure will be for a long long time.
    • 5/5
      I am very disappointed that this book is not. UK available.
    • 1/5
      Unavailable in my country...WHY??? What is wrong with country Latvia?
    • 4/5
      Games People Play by Eric Berne, M.D.Why I picked up this book: I just read I’m OK You’re OK by Thomas Harris, M.D. which was based on Berne’s Transactional Analysis or T.A. I have never red any T.A. material. I learned Berne wrote this stuff and wanted to learn more.This books gets into the three, Parent, Adult and Child perspectives. It covers many examples people play in work, love, sex, and friendships. This book talks about the many ways that we habitually relate to one another through “games.” The version I read was from 1969 and quickly saw it had dated things. Why I finished this book: this was an interesting read and there is more I’d like to read on it. Rating: I’d give it a 4 out of 5 star rating because it had some good ideas and others I did not like too much so I’d rate it as I did.
    • 2/5
      While the concept was new to me and moderately interesting, other factors got in the way. Most notably, the examples in this book are extremely dated. The underlying principles are rooted in Freudian psychology. Anything other than heterosexual orientation is treated as aberrant. Many of the classifications of games presume dated male and female roles within households. The “games” classify relationship patterns and interactions into a series of types that at once seem potentially useful and still simplistic.
    • 3/5
      I first read this book in about 2003. It was suggested to me by a woman with big hair who was making comments about other women with big hair. Bizarre! But I didn't see that game in Berne's work. As I began reading, I was struck by the 1960s tone. It was like watching the scene in Mad Men where Don Draper is discussing Betty's "psychological" problems with her psychiatrist, and the husband has more control over the process than the wife. Issues of American middle-class culture in the '60s emerge from time to time, and I wondered how such a book would fare today! It would be a candidate for the game of "Outrage" no less! But this time, I tried to comprehend the transactional analysis process by writing it down and going over the basis premises of games, and the social versus psychological roles of Parent, Adult, and Child, and how transgressions of social and psychological roles can lead to various games and situations. There is an emphasis on the results of group therapy and the therapist's observations of games, and it is clear that one is glimpsing the developmental stages of the profession of psychology (not so much psychiatry) as we know it today. Berne's work is based on his earlier publication, Transactional Analysis in Psychotherapy, and while it is suitable for a well-read general audience, the psychology professional is clearly in mind. I daresay the analyses and types of games have developed significantly since the book was written, but it is rather helpful in recognising different types of "games people play", even if all one can do is identify and then avoid such games. There are elements of Berne's idea of games that resonate with game theory in political science, albeit with less rigour in identifying the inherent biases. Nonetheless, it must be acknowledged that the behavioural revolution in political science was only beginning at this same time, and no doubt Berne was at the forefront of this revolution that continues to influence the social sciences.
    • 2/5
      The writing in this book is very weak, the examples and anecdotes are not very useful, and the book overall is too vague to be very useful.
    • 3/5
      I'm not sure how I feel about this book. There is some comfort in being handed a template of how to evaluate people's hidden motives, but it seems too amenable to becoming a stereotyping instrument. "Here's the diagnosis; here's how you 'cure' this person". I feel that I'd possibly have a more nuanced understanding if I'd read more of Berne's underlying theory, but this treatment of his concept of Game Analysis is presented as allowing its stand-alone use as a therapeutic tool. I think I'd want more from a transactional analyst than that they'd read this one book.I also found his attitudes towards gender roles almost excruciatingly archaic, with several implications of victim blaming for rape and domestic violence. Well, I suppose it was written in 1964 by a middle-aged white man living in the USA, but still...I'm studying Rogers' person-centered approach to counselling, so I guess that Berne's diagnostic/directive approach doesn't sit too well with me at this stage of my education. Nevertheless, I found much of interest and did enjoy reading the book, those cringe-making moments aside. (It looks like I do know how I feel about it after all. )
    • 2/5
      What I believe the text is the authors attempt to press the (important and apt) observations that he made into a uniform structure (what he calls GAMES). Unfortunately, I did not find this structure to be appropriate for the subject at hand.The first part makes an overly elaborate distinction between RITUALS/PROCESSES, PASTIMES, and GAMES, the difference mainly being that GAMES have an obliterate quality, while the others are in a sense honest. While this part contains some gems, I did not understand why this distinction (in this length) is valuable.The second part (which I only read half) describes several specific GAMES. Some of these descriptions are really interesting. Many are just boring and can hardly be understood.Maybe more specificity would not have been amiss; I often was not able to understand the underlying observations of the author from the generalized GAME description.I also perceived it as a problem that the names of certain GAMES are often used before they are explained; and not all names are self-explanatory.
    • 4/5
      I recommend reading this book, or one on the same topic, as an essential read for understanding the way people behave. This book was written in 1964, which lends itself to using older terminology, but the concepts presented are indispensable for personal psychological self-development and interacting with others.Dr. Berne explains the transactional games that are most often played by people. In doing so, he also presents an important aspect of our self-concept, that is, when communicating with others, we do so from the perspective of one of three stances: the Parent, the Adult, or the Child. The best stance to use is Adult to Adult communication, which is rational, self-aware, and living in the present; though Child to Child has it benefits as well, for example, playfulness.Basic transactions are direct/upfront and generally Adult to Adult. Pastime transactions are not as direct and played for fun. Game transactions are played with an ulterior motive and are almost anything but Adult to Adult. Games are learned during childhood, and as such have basic motives. People carry their childhood games into adulthood not even aware that they are playing games and then unknowingly pass the games to the next generation. Games can be harmless as long as both parties are willing participants, but games only tend to continue undealt with physiological, emotional, or physical issues from the past. Once a person becomes aware of games they are playing, they can deal with the root issue, do away with the games, and live a more enjoyable fruitful life.
    • 4/5
      Eric Berne begins by providing his analysis of "games", and the roles that we play in them. Berne describe how our character in social interaction is actually learned. He then sets forth that we mainly interact on one of three levels: child, adult or parent. He further states that the most meaningful transactions occur when we relate adult to adult, and that all other transactions are somehow either a game or simply unproductive.In the following chapters, Berne distinguishes between pastimes and games. Pastimes are models of socialization that we use in social settings. Pastimes include such models as "what ever happened to", in which people ask about other people who they may know, or "General Motors", in which people compare their cars. Berne then progresses onto Games, which he describes as "an ongoing series of complementary ulterior transactions progressing to a well-defined, predictable outcome." Berne suggests that it is human nature to use games as a means towards social interaction, but the problem arises when people use the games to an ulterior motive that is intentionally, though sometimes unconsciously, an unproductive payoff for either one or all parties involved. A typical games for example is "if it weren't for you" in which one party blames the other party for a life less satisfying.This book is written in a clear and straight forward style, making it easy to understand. The examples and concepts are common enough for everyone to see and recognize themselves and others in the games that people play. You do not need to be a psychology major to understand this book. Undoubtedly, this book is useful in demystifying some of the mystery that is human behavior.
    • 5/5
      Hey! Even if you only read the introduction of this book it will change the way you meet and greet someone in the street. Read the rest of it and... and you'll begin to see, hear and watch other people (and yourself) playing all these silly, annoying and sometimes amusing games. The great thing about this book is it teaches you how the games start and most important of all how to opt out.
    • 5/5
      A must read for anyone who has ever come away from a conversation feeling ill at ease but not quite sure why. This book has colored many of my social interactions, giving insight and technique to my responses in difficult and sometimes confusing relationships. It's scientific, well articulated, and yet easily understandable by any layman. I don't own a lot of physical books, since it would be a hardship on my frequent moving, but this is one book I refuse to do without. Perhaps the most useful and enlightening book on psychology I have ever read.
    • 1/5
      Either I wasn't 'in the right place' to read this or I just didn't get it. Either way it's one of the only books I have abandoned without finishing. I'm not saying I didn't agree with the concept of his theories, they just bored me to tears.
    • 3/5
      Interesting take on human interactional patterns; would be most comprehensible to the reader who has a background in transactional analysis.
    • 3/5
      Enlightening easy read, on the beginning of a complex subject. Shines a light on all those social niceties, pointless interactions and the roles played by each person in their daily script. Combines the psychological insights with the added bonus of incidental humor. Whilst reading through this on the train, I could identify what games were going on around me, most amusing.
    • 5/5
      As a book, or as a piece of writing, Berne's effort falls between two stools - it isn't as detailed as a serious student would want it to be, and it isn't as light-hearted or accessible as the layman sometimes would need it to be. However, the ideas contained in this slim volume are rather extraordinary, and anyone interested in true self-discovery will appreciate what's on offer.
    • 5/5
      The book that started off transactional analysis. Very interesting and a 'must read' for pretty much everyone.