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Every Last Word
Every Last Word
Every Last Word
Audiobook8 hours

Every Last Word

Written by Tamara Ireland Stone

Narrated by Amy Rubinate

Rating: 4 out of 5 stars

4/5

()

About this audiobook

If you could read my mind, you wouldn’t be smiling.
Samantha McAllister looks just like the rest of the popular girls in her junior class. But hidden beneath the straightened hair and expertly applied makeup is a secret that her friends would never understand: Sam has Purely-Obsessional OCD and is consumed by a stream of dark thoughts and worries that she can’t turn off.
Second-guessing every move, thought, and word makes daily life a struggle, and it doesn’t help that her lifelong friends will turn toxic at the first sign of a wrong outfit, wrong lunch, or wrong crush. Yet Sam knows she’d be truly crazy to leave the protection of the most popular girls in school. So when Sam meets Caroline, she has to keep her new friend with a refreshing sense of humor and no style a secret, right up there with Sam’s weekly visits to her psychiatrist.
Caroline introduces Sam to the Poet’s Corner, a hidden room and a tight-knit group of misfits who have been ignored by the school at large. Sam is drawn to them immediately, especially a guitar-playing guy with a talent for verse, and starts to discover a whole new side of herself. Slowly, she begins to feel more “normal” than she ever has as part of the popular crowd . . . until she finds a new reason to question her sanity and all she holds dear.
LanguageEnglish
Release dateJun 16, 2015
ISBN9781942907190
Every Last Word

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Reviews for Every Last Word

Rating: 4.147766288659793 out of 5 stars
4/5

291 ratings24 reviews

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  • Rating: 3 out of 5 stars
    3/5
    I really enjoyed this novel about 16-year-old Samantha's struggle to hide her OCD. Although the medications and the therapy that she's getting to treat it are working well, she's still not ready to go public about it, even with the "Crazy Eights," the group of friends she's had for years. In part, that's because the Crazy Eights aren't exactly what you'd call "nurturing": they're a tight-knit group of popular mean girls who have already shunned one group member who dared to make friends outside their circle._Every Last Word_ traces Sam's growth through her junior year of high school. She meets a new friend, Caroline, who introduces her to an underground group of poets that meet twice a week at lunch in a secret room under the school's stage. Sam discovers a love for writing poetry that's almost as deep and therapeutic as her love of swimming, and as she gets more involved with the group (including a budding romance with one of its members, AJ), she gains the strength to control some of her anxieties and to stand up to her friends. At times, the text gets a little didactic, as the author strives to educate readers about OCD. Sam's interactions with her therapist, in particular, feel a little forced. But there are other places where Stone gets it exactly right, such as when Sam walks away after a conflict with the Crazy Eights and thinks, "This sucks. And it feels good at the same time." Plus, there's a head-snapping revelation about three-quarters of the way through the book that I totally did NOT see coming, and which had me turning pages even faster to see what would happen next. I'm still not quite sure what was going on there, but I like the fact that Stone leaves the question of what Sam really experienced open to interpretation. An interesting and thoughtful addition to the growing canon of YA literature that explores mental illness, and questions whether the term "illness" is even appropriate.Note: I received this book as a free eARC from NetGalley in exchange for an honest review.
  • Rating: 3 out of 5 stars
    3/5
    Overall interesting story, but the amount of sensuality was more than I expected. Also, the blasphemy was unnecessary and sinful (what's the point?). Finally, fornication between 16 year olds is a sad thing and zero consequences. Thanks for nothing, B&N YA section ?
  • Rating: 3 out of 5 stars
    3/5
    Interesting book, it's was pretty good. There were a lot of mental health issues throughout the book, which was fine, but just in case others want to know. I did figure out the twist early on, and I really wanted to be wrong. The story was still pretty good but I do have some questions lol
  • Rating: 5 out of 5 stars
    5/5
    I think this book captures the essence and intensity of mental disorders and I love how real the mental conflict of Sam really shapes her.
  • Rating: 5 out of 5 stars
    5/5
    This was eye opening although I don’t have ocd it is helpful to see what someone with those trust goes through on a daily basis and to not judge or criticize why they do what they do
  • Rating: 4 out of 5 stars
    4/5
    it was a great book, love books about mental health!!!
  • Rating: 5 out of 5 stars
    5/5
    I like how he shows how is to live with ocd and how it affects you
  • Rating: 5 out of 5 stars
    5/5
    It is still as good as I remember it, even six years later
  • Rating: 3 out of 5 stars
    3/5
    Ok, gonna try and write a review... obviously. Haven't done too many of these so bear with me. I'm a little split on this book. On one hand the part of me that loved this book for the same reason I love a lot young adult fiction because it is just that... fiction. Thinks happen in a very idealistic way and things have a nice happy ending and that's great. If I wanted reality I'd read the news and just be depressed. I guess I really didn't have an issue with this book at all up until I got to the 'Author's Note' I felt like I had to call the author out on BS. I was legitimately annoyed by the author's note. Don't get me wrong i don't know the girl the author supposedly researched for this book and I don't know the mental health professionals this author dealt with while researching this book. I do know I've had plenty of interactions with mental health professionals whether they were my teachers, therapist, physicians, etc. to feel safe in saying "Sue" is a complete work of fiction. I do not know psychiatrist who would have respond the way she did to Sam's main experience in this book. (I'm trying to avoid spoilers while supplying explanation for my disgruntled attitude. Hopefully I succeed.) Anyway, the reality of the matter is there are different situations in this book that Sue the psychiatrist explains as someone's brain being special and that's is a-ok when in reality what's going on is HALLUCINATIONS and that's not ok. That is not how a person's brain is supposed to work. A person is NOT supposed to hear colors an in spite of what the author claims other people probably can have that experience, with enough LSD. In the real world if your brain starts hearing colors all on its own or experiences the same scenario that Sam (the main character) then your doctor is going to get your butt on some anti-psychotics pronto if not get you in on short-term hospitalization while stabilizing your medications. It's seriously very unlikely your Dr. will be inviting you into her home, around her children so you can have a tea party in her garden and then be sent home to reassess your recent life choices. I think sometimes an author needs to choose between writing an everyday fluff type of YA fiction (which I have no problem with and thoroughly enjoy quite often no judgement there) and writing a serious book about mental illness that supposedly a lot of research has gone into. I found the way psychological disorders were dealt with in this novel to be entirely unrealistic. Also I the instance of suicide in this novel came across almost as if it was suppose to be inspiring. That's how I interpreted it anyway and that's not cool, to say the least. Ok. Well that was my 3rd or 4th writing a book review, definitely my longest review. We can all just hope that in time they come a little more naturally to me. :-) Happy Reading!
  • Rating: 3 out of 5 stars
    3/5
    Good story, but extremely Predictable, the twist was obvious from the beginning
  • Rating: 5 out of 5 stars
    5/5
    teen fiction ("pure O" OCD/mental illness, friendship (true and less true); support networks).

    The first rule about Poetry Club is: You don't talk about Poetry Club; the second rule is: You don't talk about Poetry Club. I generally don't like books with poetry, but the ones in here are actually good, and the story is surprisingly layered. I did hope that the "heavyset" Sydney would reveal more of her personality sooner in the book, rather than continuing to read fluffy poems about food. Compared to Emily, whose worries about her terminally ill mother get revealed fairly quickly and extensively, Sydney's story gets short-changed, but I guess that is realistic because we don't always find out what people are dealing with, and the story encourages us to be understanding and compassionate without necessarily knowing all the private details.

    from what I gather in the author's note and acknowledgements, the author doesn't have first-hand experience with OCD or mental illness, but became interested with a close family friend was diagnosed at age 12. With that teen's input, and that of other diagnosed teens, she has tried her best to capture their points of view. I don't know if the happy ending provided here is very realistic in terms of dealing with mental illness, but it does make for a satisfying story.

    parental note: there is a small amount of language (maybe one or 2 f-words?) and the (age 16) characters engage in more-than-kissing one time, but the action is glossed over and not provided in any detail.
  • Rating: 3 out of 5 stars
    3/5
    I started this earlier this year and a student wanted it so I gave it up. This summer I just can't seem to get into it like I did earlier.
  • Rating: 4 out of 5 stars
    4/5
    I really need to learn not to read books like Every Last Word on the train ride to work. Or at the very least, I need to always have sunglasses to hide my weepy eyes. Tamara Ireland Stone has written an amazing book. It deals with OCD, with what real friendship is, and even with acceptance. Acceptance not just from the people around you, but from yourself. I found myself completely caught up in this book from the moment I finished the first page. I'll warn you now that when you pick this up, you should definitely have some tissues handy.

    This is the story of Samantha McAllister. A pretty girl, with a loving family, a popular set of friends, and Purely-Obsessional OCD. I fell for Samantha pretty hard once I recognized her dilemma. How do you be the perfectly put together popular girl, and secretly harbor dark and obsessive thoughts? How do you keep a pristine outer shell, and hide the fact that every moment of every day is filled with keeping your true self hidden? I felt for her. Highschool is a tough enough place anyway. Dealing with all of this only makes it harder.

    Now I have to admit that this is pretty much a fairy-tale in the way that it's told. While Every Last Word deals with a lot of tough topics, and does it quite well, there is an overall sense of sweetness to the whole thing. I ate it up, and I wouldn't have wanted it any other way, but I do think people will notice this. Sam's friends, despite being with her for a long time, don't know about her illness. Her family is perfect. Her therapist is perfect. Even the new friends, and the adorable boy, are all perfect. If you can set that aside, and focus on Sam as a growing character, you'll love this book. If you focus solely on those things, it might be a different experience.

    Getting back to the overall story though, I happily lost myself in Sam's life. I watched as she grew to love herself. My eyes teared up as she found a set of friends who accepted her for who she was, and made her a stronger person. I may or may not have actually cried a bit when Sam poured her heart onto the page, in the form of poetry. Even the little romance here had me giddy. I very much enjoyed my time spent with Sam.

    If you enjoy poetry, and the idea that it allows people to share things that are difficult for them otherwise, you'll love this book. If you enjoy stories where good things happen, and the protagonist learns a lot, you'll enjoy this book. I love all of those things, and so I really loved Every Last Word. I highly recommend it.
  • Rating: 2 out of 5 stars
    2/5
    Samantha McAllister is part of the "mean girls" clique in high school. Underneath her make-up, straightened hair, and carefully chosen outfits she's hiding a secret - she has OCD. She even sees a psychiatrist for it. She knows if her friends ever found out they would torture her, but they've been her whole life for so many years that she has nowhere else to go. Until she meets Caroline. Caroline is the complete opposite of what her friends would approve of. She shows Sam a secret room known as "Poet's Corner" where a small group of friends meet a couple of times a week. Sam discovers a whole new side of herself, a side she really likes, a "normal" side. But she has to keep her new friends a secret.

    This story felt flat and unrealistic to me. It deals with a serious topic but doesn't give a realistic representation of it. The story focused on Sam finding herself through friends she actually liked, people who were actually nice to her. Basically it was a typical high school story. Her OCD was sprinkled in here and there and she miraculously hides it from her friends for many years. Sam was very, very quick to take her relationship with her new boyfriend to the next level. There were so many names that I couldn't keep track of who they all were. I was kinda disappointed with the poetry aspect of the book. The only reason for the second star is because I liked Caroline's story towards the end.
  • Rating: 4 out of 5 stars
    4/5
    Huh. It's strange to have a book describe your own mind to you...and tell you it's not normal. I hate that this - like every other YA book with characters of opposing genders - turned into another trite, needless romance, but it was well-written and quite beautifully insightful. The twist at the end, while obvious from the first few chapters, was so deftly handled that it was still wonderful and heartbreaking.
  • Rating: 3 out of 5 stars
    3/5
    Ok, gonna try and write a review... obviously. Haven't done too many of these so bear with me. I'm a little split on this book. On one hand the part of me that loved this book for the same reason I love a lot young adult fiction because it is just that... fiction. Thinks happen in a very idealistic way and things have a nice happy ending and that's great. If I wanted reality I'd read the news and just be depressed. I guess I really didn't have an issue with this book at all up until I got to the 'Author's Note' I felt like I had to call the author out on BS. I was legitimately annoyed by the author's note. Don't get me wrong i don't know the girl the author supposedly researched for this book and I don't know the mental health professionals this author dealt with while researching this book. I do know I've had plenty of interactions with mental health professionals whether they were my teachers, therapist, physicians, etc. to feel safe in saying "Sue" is a complete work of fiction. I do not know psychiatrist who would have respond the way she did to Sam's main experience in this book. (I'm trying to avoid spoilers while supplying explanation for my disgruntled attitude. Hopefully I succeed.) Anyway, the reality of the matter is there are different situations in this book that Sue the psychiatrist explains as someone's brain being special and that's is a-ok when in reality what's going on is HALLUCINATIONS and that's not ok. That is not how a person's brain is supposed to work. A person is NOT supposed to hear colors an in spite of what the author claims other people probably can have that experience, with enough LSD. In the real world if your brain starts hearing colors all on its own or experiences the same scenario that Sam (the main character) then your doctor is going to get your butt on some anti-psychotics pronto if not get you in on short-term hospitalization while stabilizing your medications. It's seriously very unlikely your Dr. will be inviting you into her home, around her children so you can have a tea party in her garden and then be sent home to reassess your recent life choices. I think sometimes an author needs to choose between writing an everyday fluff type of YA fiction (which I have no problem with and thoroughly enjoy quite often no judgement there) and writing a serious book about mental illness that supposedly a lot of research has gone into. I found the way psychological disorders were dealt with in this novel to be entirely unrealistic. Also I the instance of suicide in this novel came across almost as if it was suppose to be inspiring. That's how I interpreted it anyway and that's not cool, to say the least. Ok. Well that was my 3rd or 4th writing a book review, definitely my longest review. We can all just hope that in time they come a little more naturally to me. :-) Happy Reading!
  • Rating: 4 out of 5 stars
    4/5
    4.5 stars

    This is a really great book. I would label it as mature YA because it does have a sex scene and curse words. It's honest about how teens act, think and feel I believe. Every Last Word has parts everyone can relate to about life, but it focuses on a girl with mental health issues. I think it does an excellent job of putting the reader in the character's place. It has several wonderful messages for adults and teens. I absolutely recommend.
  • Rating: 3 out of 5 stars
    3/5
    This was a touching story about true friendship, mental illness and finding your voice. I enjoyed following Sam's journey as she battled with her anxieties and obsessive thoughts and I loved the idea of the Poet's Corner. What spoilt if for me, was that about halfway through, the focus moved to Sam and AJ's romance which I felt detracted from the seriousness of the book's issues. However, still an enjoyable read.
  • Rating: 5 out of 5 stars
    5/5
    So Many Feels for this book... I am not even sure where to begin. So far every book I have read by Tamara Ireland Stone has been great. I enjoy her characters and their lives and they are relatable, but I think Sam takes the cake in this area. She is by far the most realistic of characters I have read in a long time and it isn't just because of the OCD, that is a big factor but her troubles and worries are that of a teenage girl in high school and I really appreciate that. This book was so much deeper than I ever expected and while maybe not the most realistic portrayal of OCD in a person it was still VERY well done. As a reader who suffers from anxiety issues, a lot of this was an approachable take on mental illness (esp. for younger readers).The story follows Sam as she is learning how to handle herself and her life in high school. It is not how she wants it to be and her 'friends' aren't the greatest group, especially because she feels she cannot tell them about her illness. Sam goes out of her way to find something better and happens upon the Poet's Corner, a way to break out of her 'normal' surroundings and people and be herself in front of others. In doing this she finds her true voice, friendship, herself through the 'crazy', and even a partner.The book made me think about what it means to be different, about bullying, about mental illness, about friends, and about emotions. It was a lot of feels in one place and the last 6 chapters had me in tears, and not because it was sad - but because it was an elegant ending to an emotional roller coaster. I would recommend this book to everyone.
  • Rating: 5 out of 5 stars
    5/5
    I was almost instantly wrapped up in this book. I absolutely adore that Sam’s mom is both in the picture and incredibly involved and supportive. On top of this Sam has this completely rock star therapist “Shrink-Sue”. Both of these almost seemed unreal in my jaded perspective but it made sense in the story and I really liked it. I found the portrayal of this type of OCD very accurate and appreciated the obvious research that went into developing the characters. The relationship she has with her friends is awful. I often found myself thinking of Mean Girls.d73869e430c1f82b7f0379af6b54a2041f65d91aea52d2564cdfbf31bfdca873I was fully ready to give this a complete five stars until the very weird twist. It’s not that I don’t like the twist because I do. It was finally a twist that I hadn’t completely expected. I even loved the romance which was truly gasp worthy. I’m not someone who likes much romance – in fact I tend to avoid it. The twist just didn’t seem to fit with everything else very well. It was good but it didn’t flow quite right for me. Perhaps because of my own experience in the mental health scene this addition didn’t make complete sense. This really did fill a bit of a hole for me in the YA I’ve been reading recently. If you are needing a break from fantasy or pure romance I highly recommend this!This eGalley was provided free from the publisher through Netgalley in exchange for an honest review. This in no way affected my opinion and I was compensated in no other manner.
  • Rating: 4 out of 5 stars
    4/5
    I had requested this copy as soon as I read the description but then forgot about it. I started reading it, not remembering what it was about and I was taken by surprise. I am a Psychology major and this story fascinated me so much. This is not your normal contemporary, girly, cliche story. It’s not focused on romance. It is more focused on Sam, the main character’s life and her conflict with dealing with OCD and keeping it a secret from her friends. Until one day Sam meets Caroline, a girl who has her own demons and she introduces Sam to Poet’s Corner, a place where teens go to talk about their feelings through poems. But everything is not what it seems and Sam’s sanity really is questioned.Did this book give me goosebumps? Yes, it really did. I was surprised and fascinated by everything I was reading. Sam’s character fascinated me to no end. Even though she is dealing with OCD—more on the obsessive side than compulsive—she has set goals for herself. Sam doesn’t whine about her disorder or her life. She gets that she has to live with it and has no choice but to keep fighting forward. Sam’s character grows as the story progresses. The reader gets to know how Sam keeps dealing with her disorder yet it gets to a point where she doesn’t let it stop her. I related to Sam because I write poems a lot, especially when I’m in my dark moods or just feel like writing how I’m feeling. Anyways, I wish I had a Poet’s Corner at my school or even at college. That would have been so liberating, knowing I’m not the only one. Everything in the room was described so vividly that the reader will be able to picture everything in the room.I didn’t like Sam’s friends. It’s as if they were a clique and no one could have other friends besides them. They would exclude Sam from everything, though! I hated them for it. And one of the reasons why I disliked Sam was because she kept her new friends from Poet’s Corner a secret because her “besties” couldn’t know about them or else she would be kicked out of their group. The other supporting characters, like Emily, Sydney, AJ and Caroline were amazing. Those are real friends that I wish I had in school. Those that actually understand you even if you haven’t told them what you are going through. That’s how they were with Sam. They were there to support her.The one friendship that stands out is Sam’s and Caroline’s. As soon as they meet, they click, they connect, they understand one another right off the bat. Caroline helped Sam grow out of her shell and expand her horizons. She brought her to Poet’s Corner so Sam wouldn’t feel alone. Caroline was there through every step of the way until the end. Caroline doesn’t feel ashamed of being Sam’s friend, knowing she has OCD. Instead, she helps Sam control her thoughts and is there for her every step of the way. A friendship like that is definitely one to admire. But there is a surprise at the end that left me speechless. The thought had crossed my mind but I dismissed it and then it took me by surprise! It is very interesting.Overall, this story was quite eye-opening and very respectful when it came to this serious matter. I loved that the author included therapy sessions with Sam and her psychiatrist so the reader gets a glimpse to how that life can be. If you are interested in reading a YA Contemporary story that focuses on personal growth amidst a personal battle with mental health that can be eye-opening, I really recommend this story for you.
  • Rating: 5 out of 5 stars
    5/5
    I wanted to read Every Last Word because I am drawn to books with mental illness. I deal with it myself, and though my main issues are bipolar and anxiety, I do have touches of OCD. For example, I have a parking spot, and if that's taken a parking row at the stores I frequent, and I have a bite ratio where I eat in a way to have a certain amount of each or at least top 3 to have last bites in order of preference. I also get trapped in some thought cycles, so I can say with personal experience that Every Last Word is well researched and her disease is realistic. Samantha is an easy character to like and for me to empathize with. She has popular friends, and though she constantly worries about her position in their personal heirarchy, and that they'll find out about her disease. I loved it when she meets Caroline, who is more of a normal person (i.e. not super popular, but has her own group of friends that are connected by interests-- and mostly, not in the spotlight like her current group is.) And they are also more genuine. Sam sometimes talks with her therapist about them and her psychiatrist urges her to expand her circle of friends. I liked Sam's mom. She is very in touch with what her daughter deals with, and will step in and knows the right things to say and do to help break the cycle. She is so supportive and amazing. Some parents don't understand and don't try to, leaning on yelling or telling the child to get over it, its all in your head (which it is, but not that way). I did like the addition of her being a swimmer. It is a place that she is centered and not constantly analyzing. It is something that she loved and hopes to get a scholarship for. I will also admit that while I love the idea of the Poet's Corner, and the comraderie that they share, and how they welcome Sam in-- I skimmed a lot of the poems and lyrics. It isn't that they are bad or anything, that is just not my thing to read, which is why many of you readers know, that I skip books written in these formats. The romance in this one was sweet, and I like how she had to first admit to and apologize for some huge mistakes that really hurt someone else. I liked the guy in question, although I do wish that she would have been more upfront to begin with about her illness when it became clear they were heading into the more than friends category. I love the growth in Sam, and how she starts to stand up for herself more, and make choices because she wants to not because she was afraid of upsetting the balance with her friends or to stay in her spot where she pretends so much, but she thinks she is comfortable. She makes such big steps, but growth, especially when dealing with mental illnesses can always be two steps forward and one back, or maybe even leaps back before more recovery and growth can happen again. Oh my. I just got to the huge twist, and I totally did not see that coming. Um. Yeah. It just blew my mind, and I wish that I had a blogger reading this on speed dial right now. Because dude. That was intense... Maybe it shocked me so much because I didn't see it coming and I thought that I was informed with the mental health issues, and I should have seen it coming. But I didn't. I loved the ending, it was so fitting and perfect for the book. What an emotional journey, but loved every second of it.Bottom Line: Def one of the top ya contemporaries this year. Fantastic, beauitful and emotional.
  • Rating: 4 out of 5 stars
    4/5
    Sixteen year old Sam tries to be a typical teenager, lucky to be lifelong friends with the popular girls the Crazy Eights, attends high school, and participates in club swim every summer. But, she's not typical. Sam has OCD, takes sleeping meds every night, has anxiety attacks, and sees a counselor every Wednesday for the past four years. No one besides her family knows; she has even kept her obsession with the number 3. This school year is different: Sam begins to question the Crazy Eights' rules and friendship and new friend helps Sam deal with her obsessions and introduces Sam to a secret poetry club. Jealousy, anger, relief, and passion abound as teenagers deal with change, finding themselves, and acceptance. Author's note explains the research and focus for this book. Another inspirational and hopeful fictional resource to add to a high school OCD library collection.
  • Rating: 5 out of 5 stars
    5/5
    Usually when reading a story, you like to be able to relate to the main character or see yourself in them some way or another. I didn't relate to Samantha at all. OCD is something I'm aware of but not all that familiar with. Hearing her talk about her tendencies and the voices in her head that push their way out, there was no way I could understand or relate to that. However, I soon realized that I actually related to Sam more than I thought; crushes, friend problems, etc. It was truly eye opening to be able to see that I'm really not that different from people struggling with things like OCD. Sam is a girl that has a lot of "hidden" sides to her. On top of trying to keep her OCD a secret, she deals with other high school problems. During the summer she's "Summer Sam" and is happy and true to herself. Once school comes back around she's reunited with a toxic group of friends that make her feel like less of a person. Most of the time in contemporaries I know the the big conflict is going to be something that petty or that the main character will quickly resolve. The twist was so shocking to me and never crossed my mind while I was reading the story. I feared for Sam and how this would affect her, if she would even make it through. Every Last Word shows the impact of true friendship and believing in yourself. This was a truly unique, intriguing, life-changing book that takes your mind places you never thought it would