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    Never Sleep Alone
    Never Sleep Alone
    Never Sleep Alone
    Ebook167 pages1 hour

    Never Sleep Alone

    By Alex Schiller

    2.5/5

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    About this ebook

    “In order to find The One, you must become The One.” Dr. Alex Schiller doles out hilarious yet profoundly wise dating advice in her new sex and dating manual, which will transform you into an Exceptional Individual capable of seducing everyone you meet.

    “My name is Dr. Alex Schiller and I Never Sleep Alone. Unless I want to. Man or woman, rich or poor, teenage or elderly—NSA will transform YOU into The One that everyone wants…”

    For the past three years in New York City, Dr. Alex (not a real doctor) has been performing her hit comedy and dating show “Never Sleep Alone” to sold out audiences, helping thousands of people from all over the world transform themselves and fulfill their sociosexual desires.

    Now, with her signature blend of outrageous humor and profound wisdom, the celebrated guru has created an interactive sex and dating guide that takes you on a fantastic journey of exciting new adventures, self-discovery, and transformation.

    With her nine NSA Principles, her compulsively quotable NSA Truths, and her interactive NSA Challenges, Dr. Alex inspires us all to laugh at ourselves, to make real human connections, and, most importantly, to Never Sleep Alone.

    Unless we want to.
    LanguageEnglish
    PublisherGallery Books
    Release dateFeb 3, 2015
    ISBN9781476741338
    Never Sleep Alone
    Author

    Alex Schiller

    Dr. Alex Schiller* (a.k.a. Roslyn Hart) is a writer, performer, and producer, currently residing in New York City and Naples, Italy. She has been the subject of feature stories in several international publications and media outlets including The New York Times, Time Out New York, The Huffington Post, and The Daily Mail. *Dr. Alex is not a real doctor.

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      Book preview

      Never Sleep Alone - Alex Schiller

      This book is dedicated to the beautiful person who gave me the most intense orgasm of my life. You know who you are.

      CONTENTS

      Welcome to NSA

      Prepare Yourself

      NSA Principle 1

      NSA=NSA

      Expect nothing. Receive everything.

      NSA Principle 2

      BFF = UCB

      Your best friends are your worst sexual enemies.

      NSA Principle 3

      STAR

      Don't see the movie—BE THE MOVIE.

      NSA Principle 4

      FIRE

      Stupid phones, Smart habits, and Mind-Blowing Orgasms

      NSA Principle 5

      BDSM

      People are most seduced by what is most difficult to understand.

      NSA Principle 6

      PEEPs

      Fuck the many. Become The One.

      NSA Principle 7

      C=FML

      Chemistry is an asshole.

      NSA Principle 8

      PRO

      Go Down or Go Home.

      NSA Principle 9

      RIP

      You always come first.

      A Note from Dr. Alex

      About Alex Schiller

      WELCOME TO NSA

      YOU HAVE FOUND NSA at the perfect moment in your life and you must begin immediately.

      Tomorrow your genitals could turn to dust.

      Don’t waste the best years of your life being fearful and mediocre. It is time to overcome your inhibitions, transform your existence, and become the Exceptional Individual you were meant to be.

      I want to help you.

      I want to help you feel better than you have ever felt in your entire life. I want to help you become your most beautiful and powerful self, so that you will never feel lonely or hungry or horny again.

      I am often asked, Dr. Alex, how do I find The One? How do I find that perfect person who makes me feel complete?

      My answer to that question is always the same:

      To find The One, you must become The One.

      WHEN YOU ARE The One, you never want for anything, because you are always being given everything. When you are The One, you never chase after sex, romance, or love—because everyone is always chasing after YOU.

      When you are The One, you Never Sleep Alone.

      Unless you want to.

      You don’t have to sleep with everyone.

      But everyone is going to want to sleep with you.

      And when everyone wants to sleep with you, you have the power to get whatever you want.

      NSA is a philosophy consisting of 9 NSA Principles that, when fully actualized, are guaranteed to transform you into The One that everyone wants.

      Do exactly as I tell you, without hesitation or expectations, and you shall not fail.

      Let us begin.

      PREPARE YOURSELF

      YOU ARE ABOUT TO go on an amazing journey.

      You are going to have new experiences, you are going to visit exotic places, you are going to meet beautiful people, and these people are going to want to sleep with you.

      If this is hard for you to believe, then you are just like everybody else. And because you are just like everybody else, almost nobody wants to sleep with you.

      NSA TRUTH

      People only want to sleep with people who are better than they are.

      The good news is:

      98 percent of the population is mediocre.

      Do you know what that means?

      me·di·o·cre- adj mē-dē-ˈō-kər\

      of only ordinary or moderate quality; neither good nor bad; barely adequate

      That’s you.

      Yes, you.

      You are barely adequate.

      You inspire no strong emotions or passionate reactions from the people around you.

      But fear not. Most people are mediocre. And most of those mediocre people have no idea they are mediocre. Did you know you were mediocre before I told you?

      You’re welcome.

      By actively taking steps to transform yourself, while the rest of the Mediocre Majority stay exactly as they are, you immediately become better than most people, which will make most people want to sleep with you.

      From this point forward, we are going to focus on raising you above the Mediocre Majority and transforming you into an Exceptional Individual. Do you know what exceptional means?

      ex·cep·tion·al- adj ik-ˈsep-shə-nəl\

      well above average; unusual, extraordinary, different from others

      This book contains several NSA Challenges, which you must complete before proceeding to the next NSA Principle. If you truly complete every NSA Challenge while fully and consistently actualizing the 9 NSA Principles, you will become an Exceptional Individual whom everyone wants to sleep with.

      You will become The One.

      If you don’t, you won’t.

      I personally complete each NSA Challenge several times a year and update NeverSleepAlone.com regularly with my latest results. As a sociosexual scientist, I am curious to see what effect different variables have on the NSA Challenges. Sometimes I wear my hair differently, sometimes I pretend to be deaf, and sometimes I dress like a man and seduce an older woman, or a pair of young gay brothers.

      Feel free to experiment.

      You can read the results of my NSA Challenges at NeverSleepAlone.com—I can’t wait to read yours.

      If you do not complete the challenges, you will not fully actualize the 9 NSA Principles, and you will not complete your transformation.

      If you find the NSA Program too difficult, you can always move to a third-world country and bring clean water to poor people who will sleep with you. But, for right now, while you’re living in this beautiful developed country, I want you to do your best to be all that you can be.

      NSA Principle 1

      NSA = NSA

      Never Sleep Alone = No Strings Attached

      IF YOU WANT TO Never Sleep Alone (NSA), you must actualize the principle of No Strings Attached (NSA). Which means:

      You must be OPEN to every new experience.
      and
      You must have NO EXPECTATIONS for any experience.

      It’s that simple.

      If you can truly master this one lesson, you will become better than most people, which will make most people want to sleep with you.

      Most people are not open to new experiences. Most people would never go on a vacation to Brazil by themselves. Most people are not brave enough to meet their former high school teacher for a late-night drink. Most people are cowards who say no when the busboy invites them to a disco party. Most people say no when their mother’s friend offers them a blow job.

      You say, That’s not me! I say yes all the time!

      Liar.

      You say no more than you say yes. And because you have such a limited number of new experiences, you approach each new experience with multiple unrealistic expectations.

      On the rare occasion when you are open to a new experience, like most people, you are expecting a certain outcome. You’re expecting the person you asked to dinner to make the reach. You’re expecting the person you went down on last night to call you again. You’re expecting to find the love of your life.

      And when your ridiculous expectations are not met, you believe you have failed. This feeling of failure keeps you from actively seeking more new experiences, and this continued lack of new experiences just leads to more unrealistic expectations.

      It is a vicious cycle from which you must break free.

      NSA TRUTH

      A shortage of experiences will lead to a surplus of expectations.

      Expectations are poison. They make you feel anxious, they make you look unattractive, and they make it nearly impossible for you to give and receive MBOs.

      Mind-

      Blowing

      Orgasm

      Do you want to have Mind-Blowing Orgasms?

      Then you must learn to have No Expectations.

      After my live seminar, there is always someone who comes up to me and asks, How am I supposed to have No Expectations? It’s impossible!

      I say to this person, Take off your shirt.

      They comply.

      I then ask, What are you expecting to happen now?

      They say, nervously, I really don’t know.

      I then put a hundred-dollar bill in their hand and ask again, What are you expecting to happen now?

      Now happy, they again say, I really don’t know.

      I then say, Take off your pants.

      They hesitate.

      I then take a wad of hundred-dollar bills out of my pocket and start counting the money.

      They immediately take off their pants.

      A crowd begins to form around them.

      I then ask again, What are you expecting to happen now?

      They reply, quite excited, I really don’t know.

      I then say, You have No Expectations?

      This person, now nearly naked and quite happy, answers, I have No Expectations!

      I then snatch the hundred-dollar bill from their hand, throw a glass of water in their face, turn

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