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Literacy Memoir For as long as I can remember I have spoken Spanish and English. I do not consider English to be my second language, or Spanish to be my first; I believe that I learned both languages at the same time. My parents would talk to me in Spanish while my Nanny would talk to me in English. My parents felt very strongly about me knowing the English well, too be better prepared than other Hispanics kids would have learn English while in school. My father in particular felt that I needed to speak correctly, so I wouldnt be mocked for my accent or for speaking in the wrong way. By knowing how to speak English and Spanish before school, really set me apart from other Hispanic children. Most other Hispanics in class had no idea what the teacher would be saying, much less read or write what was told. For this children that struggled with English were enlisted to this program called English as a Second Language (ESL). I was one of the few that was exempt from it. Yet there was not program for the bilingual children to also learn to read and write their other language. Knowing another language other than English meant it had to practice it outside of school, which was not always available. The idea of this ESL program is great, you cant teach someone to read or write in a language if they cant speak. They have special teachers whose main focus is teach the little ones English, after the children know enough to not have issues in class; the second part of the program began. Step two was to aid the children with being in the same reading level as the other kids in their grade, and teaching them how to write. I would constantly be pulled out of class to translate and aid with these kids. This was great due to the fact that when one practices what one learns is when the information really sticks with one. I use to love helping out and I use to think of myself as special because I spoke English and Spanish while all the teacher and most student just spoke English, and the few kids in ESL mainly spoke Spanish. I felt like I was a valuable student to

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have, just in case the Spanish teacher wasnt around, I could get pulled out of class and help translate. Seems a bit silly, but I remember loving getting out of class to help translate. Nowadays it is fairly common to find bilingual people, but Spanish is by far the second most known language here in the United States. Many of us bilingual people tend to Code switch or more commonly known as Spanglish, we switch from English to Spanish, or Spanish to English when speaking with one another. To be its almost natural when Im around my siblings and cousins, when I cant think of a certain one in one language I use the same word but in the other language. I also to think of Spanish as being my Home Voice because I usually just speak Spanish at home or with other Spanish people which is usually just my family. My school voice would be English but not English I use slang and my use of grammar may not be correct all of the time. What I have notices it that all most of my cousins have moments where their Spanish accent come out or they say English words very Spanish, and I dont recall this happening to me. I remember telling my friends I spoke Spanish, and or they heard me talking to my parents and they would be completely surprised about me being able to speak Spanish. This was crazy for me, because I thought its obvious that Im of Spanish background, but my classmates would tell me that theyve never heard a Spanish accent and theyve never heard me speak Spanish, so they assumed I didnt speak it. The first three years of high school teachers reinforce grammar laws, pronunciation different styles of writing, and raising the reading/writing level and to make us pass the writing test. This writing test given to every student in high school, to make sure that their writing level is standard. This standard consists of grammar, spelling, structure, combination of sentences, and vocabulary. The graders dont look at ones style or the background that they came from, the just want to see that ones know the basic things to write a paper. The last year of high school my AP

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teacher wanted us the student to write in our own style, and I remember that most of struggled because we had all been drilled this structure year after year. All that drilling to pass the test made most of as writer loose our own style, and our identity in our writing was nonexistent, most of papers would be almost identical. The simple Thesis, three body paragraphs and conclusion was all I could write, without this I felt lost and had no idea where to start writing. I feel like these standardized test is good idea, because there should be at least some basic level or writing that students should be able to write, but the grading needs to be completely changed. Instead of graders just looking for papers to have the thesis, topics sentences and conclusion they should look at the content, style, structure, spelling, grammar, and basic understanding of how prompts/different papers such as research papers, narratives, short stories etc. should be written. This is just like Standard American English (SAE) literacy, the use of correct grammar and speaking with practically no dialect. Who has the right to decide to the standard is, and what is incorrect in the English language? This SAE strips people from their identity, one dialect may help reveal ones background and where theyre from. This is the big debate of Ebonics, a dialect of English which is infamous use of incorrect grammar. This makes me wonder why some people are considered illiterate just because they have a dialect or grammar isnt perfect. People write and speak differently because of their surroundings and how they were raised, just like all dialects vary from person to person. This does not mean they do not know how to talk correctly, this is how they were raised and its a type dialect that passes on generation to generation like any other dialect. This makes one think; what is literacy? Does it mean one has to speak, read and write it in order to be literate; can one just be able to read and be called literate? Can one just be able to write and be called literate? I came to the conclusion that all three are part of being literate, and

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that and three of those are equally as important. If you have all three parts that you can be considered literate but if you dont one cant fully be recognized as literate. One cannot just speak a language and be literate, they need to able to write to someone and be able to read the language. If you cannot speak it than you cant communicate with other people unless you write it down. If one is jut able to read, then you cant talk with people nor write down what you are trying to say. These questions made me question my literacy in Spanish, I could speak the language but struggled to read and write it. I came to realization that because I mainly focused in reading and writing and English for school, I had neglected to learn how to read or write in Spanish. My parents were always on the go, never having time to help me with homework, so what I learned in school was the only thing I knew, which was only in English. I tried to read Spanish on my own yet, it was hard because I had to teach myself and know the correct pronunciation. Unlike English my teacher helped me learn how to read and in pronunciation. Teaching oneself is a difficult task and thus my Spanish reading skills were still at an all-time low. If my parents would of helped me try to read and write Spanish, I would have a better understanding to the Spanish language and been able to practice my reading and writing to prefect it. I feel insecure when I speak Spanish; I tend to stutter when Im unsure or cant seem to express myself in Spanish. It all started after my aunts would laugh or point out on how I said thing incorrectly or pronounced them wrong, and I became cautious about my speaking. I went to Mexico for a summer, and when I came back my Spanish has improved so much, my pronunciation was better and I had gained confidence in my Spanish again. My stuttering stopped once I came back, but from time to time I still tend to stutter if I get nervous or insecure.

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I have to the conclusion that Literacy consist of three things; Writing, Reading, and Speech. In my opinion one doesnt have to speak or write in Standard American English, to be disclosed as being literate. Im claim to be literate in regard with English, because I can speak, read and write. I consider myself to be partially literate in Spanish, because I cannot be labeled as being fully literate in Spanish, due to the fact that I struggle with the reading writing of it. I use to think of myself as being literate in Spanish, yet I came to realize that I need to practice reading and writing in Spanish, and speak Spanish with proper grammar and pronunciation, as much as I did an English and then I can consider myself being literate in Spanish. I want to improve my literacy in Spanish because when I have kids, I want my kids to able to know Spanish, I want them to continue with culture. I feel as if many people, like me whom were born here and speak both language, they arent passing on the Spanish language to their kids. I want my kids to be able speak to their grandparents, I want them to be able to read and write Spanish so they can communicate with other people fluent in Spanish, and to continue to pass on the Spanish culture.