Jessie Powers Professor Cassel English 112 Online 4 August 2013 Texting: Preventing People From Having Face-to-Face

Conversations

In the 21st century there is no doubt that technology has taken over, but is it prohibiting people from getting to know one another? Communication is an essential skill to master in human societies, however, with so many forms of communications these days, it has almost become nonessential to meet up with someone for coffee to have a conversation. (Lack of Face-to-Face communication 1-5) The point of conversation is to connect with someone and explore his experiences, thoughts, feelings, and inner appreciations. (Weinberg) In todays society however, the quickest, most common form of communication seems to be texting; which is most common between teens and young adults but now its rapidly growing. (Jack Cafferty) Text messaging is preventing us from meeting people face to face, in fact some people text others that they would never actually talk to in person. Since texting is the default form of communication, people are becoming less and less personable because many texts can be misconstruing, cause impatience, and decrease social interaction as well as face-to-face communication. Although all of these are true, text messaging can also be used as a quick and easy method to get ahold of someone.

Texting has been known to cause many miscommunications that lead to unnecessary disputes. For example, a simple k can be perceived as rude or disrespectful even though the sender is just simply replying to the text they had previously received. Something that is not really understood while texting is emotion because you cant see the other persons facial expressions or tone of voice. According to David Thomas online blog titled Mail Online, the art of conversation is diminishing because you can not, Detect a tone of voice Ive noticed a lot lately that my kids are frequently offended when texting an actual adult because they find them rude and abrupt. Thats because mature grown-ups, particularly men dont litter texts with the kisses, exclamation signs, little stage directions with asterisks on either side like * blush * and so forth that tell one kid what the other kid is feeling (Thomas). The reason adults do not use these texting signs are because they grew up in a time period where they physically expressed their emotions in a personal manner, rather than through a text. Not knowing the emotions put behind words can leave someone feeling very concerned, apprehensive, or even upset. Vocal tones and facial expressions are crucial in a conversation to know where the person is coming from or what they are trying to say in a conversation, but if they are absent it can completely alter a conversation. (Newberg, Waldman) Also, The lack of face-to-face cues may create ambiguity. Without hearing a person's voice or seeing body language and facial expressions, you may not be sure what the person

means. This ambiguity activates the imagination, stirs up fantasies, and enhances the tendency to project your own expectations, wishes, and anxieties unto the somewhat shadowy figure sitting at the other end of the online connection (Suler, J.R). Communication in the form of texting is shaping people into being impatient. Because text messaging is known to be quick and simple, many have become very impatient when a reply takes longer than the usual amount of time. Sometimes even emotions rise and they become aggressive waiting for a response. This type of immediate gratification one desires is not healthy because things in life do not come that easy. It is just simply not realistic. Unfortunately the one who desires this gratification is the one who put this stress on themselves with the time limits created in their own minds, these are also people who often have less going on so they expect the people they are texting to be doing nothing as well. Unlike phone calls, there are no assured rules when one must reply to a text message. Impatience is a poor characteristic no one wants to have, but sometimes with text messaging one is forced into it. In addition, impatience often causes un-needed stress that can ruin the day of someone that is receiving a text message. The stress that is caused by impatience comes when someone is waiting for an important text back but they may not know the circumstances of the person on the other side. The other person may not want to be rude and take out their cell phone because they may be in a meeting, already in a face-to-face conversation, or anything else that may be more important than responding to a text message right away. Overall, the

unknowingness of the emotions behind a text can lead someone to more stress and impatience that can put a hindrance on the lives and relationships of the many text message users. The lack of face-to-face communication is caused greatly by the texting technology and it is hurting our society. One doesnt get the experience of talking faceto-face when one is always texting on our phones. Consequently, people who text a lot may be less comfortable with an in-person conversations and may even pull out their cell phone to communicate with others in their presence. (Zawn Villines) Good relationships often happen unexpectedly by enjoying each others company by getting to know one another. It is hard to enjoy each others company over the phone. When an individual uses his or her mobile phone, in company, to send a text message they believe that they are being social by keeping in touch. While this may be true, there is an underlying element that is totally missed. That individual is losing out on the opportunity to communicate face-to-face with the person in front of them. Relationships also suffer with the lack of personal touch. If people resume only communicating through text messaging, they are less likely to develop long lasting personal relationships. (Anonymous, 2013) It can also be said that, when people communicate primarily via text, theyre much less likely to have meaningful conversations. Sometimes people have only partaken in personal relationships because of contact through technology. It can be said technology has its positive aspects, but it cannot replace face-to-face

communication, which ultimately develops relationships, even if they start over the Internet. (Lack of Face-to-Face communication 1-5) Text messaging provides an alternative way to deal with an issue that will often either not change anything or possibly make things worse. Instead of confronting someone face to face about a conflict, text messaging provides a way to hide behind a phone and say things that would not necessarily be said in person in order to make it easier to deal with. (Holly Ojalvo) Making it easier is not always better, especially in this case. Face-to-face interaction makes it easier for people to strengthen their relationship in general as well as work things out in time of conflict. The days of talking to random people at a coffee shop, or simply introducing yourself to someone in a public area are becoming extinct. It seems as though the world is becoming more introverted through this advancement in technology. Rather than saying hello to an attractive person and trying to establish rapport from there, a person will rush home to get on social media to try to link up with that attractive person on a site like Facebook or Twitter, where they begin to try to build a relationship from there. A good example of face-to-face interaction diminishing is the new television show, Catfish. This show is about people who meet over social media and form a relationship, then meet for the first time in person months or even years after their social media relationship began. In the show, the people often end up not talking to each other after they meet face to face which often hurts them in the end. This is not how our relationships should be and can be prevented by simply having face-to-face

interactions more often.

Based on the research, the authors opinion is that with the astonishing advancements in technology over the past few decades, text messaging has taken over communication and it is slowly pulling people away from interpersonal skills and solid relationships. Face-to-face interaction has diminished and confrontation has become much easier to avoid, impatience has become accepted as normal for society, and many unnecessary problems have arisen. These are all due to the fact that text messaging is now controlling the way people in society interact with each other. Some may say that text messaging is a great alternative for communication because of how convenient it is, but clearly the disadvantages out weigh the advantages and texting is in turn hurting society more than helping. This is not what people ultimately want in their relationships to make them better as a whole. Text messaging is far to over-used and if people want to retain real, authentic relationships, they need to revert back to old fashioned, face to face interactions rather than hiding behind a phone or website and acting like someone they are not. Text messaging can be very helpful to a certain point, but that point has been crossed by nearly all of society today and clearly, text messaging is an issue in causing the lack of face-to-face communication rather than just being easy and convenient.

Four people close enough to talk, but are texting instead.

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