Stephanie Gray

UWRT 1102
Dr. Rand
02/16/15
The Big Decision
Every year, around 20 million students apply to college (U.S.
Department of Education); some apply to only one school, while others apply
to up to fifteen schools. Every one of these students has to decide where
they want to spend the next four years of their life. Some decide one
semester is enough, and some love it so much they stay for six years or even
more. No matter how long you stay at a college, it comes down to the big
decision of where you want to go. For me, this was a major conflict; I had no
idea where I wanted to go, and when it came down to the final decision I am
still not sure if I made the right choice.
Growing up, I always knew what I wanted to be a pediatric nurse. I
thought I was so lucky because the easy part was over, determining what I
want to be. All my friends were struggling with what job they wanted to have
and what path they wanted to chose. I was happy because I could easily say
I wanted to be a pediatric nurse and work in a hospital. I soon realized that
the easy part was far from over, I still had to chose what college or university
I wanted to go to and then see if I even get in.
I started making a list of schools that I knew I wanted to apply to. My
number one school was The University of Connecticut; it just seemed like the

best fit for myself. UConn is a big school, has a great nursing program, is
really into school spirit, has great sports teams, and is affordable. I knew
UConns nursing program was very competitive so I started adding more
schools to the list that were much like UConn, like the University of
Massachusetts, The University of Rhode Island, and Rutgers University.
Finding these schools helped me narrow down on the type of school I wanted
to go to. I wanted a pretty big school because I wanted to have a lot of
options and meet new people. I wanted a school with a big sports program
because I loved school spirit and watching sports. I also sought out a school
with a good nursing program. I also needed the school to be affordable for
my family and I. The one thing I was unsure about was how far away I
wanted to be from home. I have never really been away from my home and
my family so I didnt know if it would be hard or easy.
My decision also came down to where my twin sister Brianna wanted to
go. I knew I didnt want to go to school with her, I loved her but I wanted to
see what it was like with out her. I also didnt want to be seen as those twins
who go to college together. Brianna and I had a friend who was looking to go
to school down south, and he told us about the University of South Carolina
and Clemson University. We looked into those schools and decided to take a
trip down to visit them. We flew into Charlotte and my mom wanted to look
here at UNCC. I really liked it, but I liked USC, Clemson and other schools
more and I thought they were better schools for me so I decided not to apply
to UNCC.

I had a lot to think about and I did a lot of research and Brianna and I
decided we were both looking for the exact same things for college so we
applied to all the same schools: UConn, UMass, URI, Rutgers, USC, Clemson,
Southern Connecticut State University, and the University of Delaware. All of
these schools met the criteria we were looking for. The only school that was
different was Southern, my dad wanted Brianna and I to go here because it
was only fifteen minutes away and it was a lot cheaper then the rest of the
schools. I didnt want to go here because it was way to close to home and I
wanted to branch out more.
. After a couple of months went by, I started hearing back but
unfortunately it was not good news. I was getting rejected, deferred, or
waitlisted to a lot of my top schools. I was very disappointed and angry; I
didnt know what to do. I decided to apply to three more schools, UNCC,
Quinnipiac University, and The University of Vermont. I thought I had good
chance of getting into these schools, and in the end, I did get accepted to
these three schools, but none of them were my number one.
Brianna decided on the University of South Carolina and so after that I
decided I wanted to go to UNC Charlotte. Everything added up here; the
campus was absolutely beautiful, the school it huge and has great sports
program and a newly added football team. UNCC is far away from home
(twelve hours) but I thought it would be interesting to be far away from
home. The south is a lot different then the north and I wanted to see what it
was like. One of my goals after I graduate is to travel a lot so I wanted to

come down here and see more of the US then just the north. My parents
allowed me to have a car at school and Brianna was only an hour and a half
south of me so I could visit her if I wanted to. I was excited to come to UNCC,
but in the back of my head I knew that this was not my number one school
and that I would have to adjust to life far away from home.
Whenever I think about school, I always remember how I thought of
coming here. My initial reaction about UNCC was not great, I like visiting the
school, but I enjoyed other schools a lot more. I think because I was not
accepted to those other schools that my choice only came down to UNCC. I
was devastated and could only blame myself for not working hard enough. I
saw my friends around me all going to their number one schools and I new
that I was not. So my reaction was not what I hoped it would be about
choosing a college to spend the next four years at.
I soon realized that Im not the only person who didnt get into their
first choice school or there top schools, a bunch of high school seniors were
going through the same exact thing. I kept on making it seem like I was the
only person who was going through this when I was not. I started to change
my attitude towards UNCC because I knew I would be spending the next four
years there and I wanted to be happy. My family and friends were very
supportive in my choice to go to UNCC, my dad was a little worried about
both my sister and I being far away from home and on our own, but he
believed in us. It helped having an older sister who already went to college
but Laurens college experience was a lot different then ours. Lauren knew

what schools she wanted to go to, Eastern Connecticut State University,

which is an hour and a half to two hours away. She knew she wanted to go
there and she got accepted easily. She only applied to two schools. So when
it came to Brianna and I applying to eight plus schools, it was a lot different.
But Laurens college processes definitely helped influence our college
process.
Soon summer would be ending and it would be time to start my
journey here at school. I wasnt really nervous about the whole college part
of college and making friends and going out and finding out who I am. I
wasnt nervous about leaving my family and friends and twin and starting
over. None of that made my nervous, what scared me was when I went to
orientation over the summer. The nursing advisors really shook me up, they
explained how competitive the nursing program is, and that just because I
was accepted into the pre-nursing program, didnt mean I would be accepted
to nursing. They told me how I could not get below a B in my classes if I
wanted to move on in nursing. This scared me a lot and blind-sided me from
what I later learned I should have had some worry about.
After a couple of weeks at school, I quickly realized that I was
homesick. All of my friends went to school up north and I was alone here.
They all got to visit each other and always seemed to be having a fun time. I
liked it here at UNC Charlotte but I didnt love it. I started to go visit my sister
on some weekends; I even went to her football games. Whenever I was at
her school, I found that I had so much more fun and that I liked it a lot more

then UNCC. I soon found that my decision to come here might have been
wrong; I did apply to USC and I got accepted eventually, and I was starting to
regret not going there in the first place.
I started looking into transferring to USC, but found that it was
extremely hard to transfer into USCs nursing program. My sister was in their
nursing program and like here at UNCC, you have pre-nursing and then you
apply to the nursing program after your freshman year. At both schools they
only take the top 50% of students from pre-nursing into nursing. I was
nervous and upset now because I found that the odds of me getting
accepted as a transfer student to the nursing program was very slim. I soon
started thinking about transferring somewhere closer to home, but I realized
everywhere I would want to transfer to was a school I didnt get accepted to
in the first place.
At Thanksgiving, I decided I wanted to go to Southern Connecticut
State University. I decided I wanted to go here because I thought I didnt
have any other options. To me Southern was an easy school; a school that a
lot of people get accepted to and a lot of kids I went to high school with go
there. My younger sister even decided to go here. I knew I would do well at
Southern, I thought the classes would be super easy and I wouldnt have to
try and I would be close to home. I knew I wouldnt be happy though, I
assumed that I would be miserable but at least I would be close to home,
possibly living at home. I think deep down I just wanted to go here because I

knew I was not happy at UNCC and this was an easy way out. But I still
wasnt certain that this was what I really wanted to do.
There is a large difference in applying to college as a high school
senior, and apply to college as a transfer student. A lot has changed, I have
already experienced college and campus life and I have learned what I like
and what I dont like. I dont like being far away from home and always being
the first one out of all my friends to go back to school. I miss my friends a lot
and dont like being twelve hours away from them. I miss my family a lot too;
I liked being home for winter break and being able to spend time with my
friends and family.
I truly had a lot to think about, I didnt want to make any more
mistakes or regret going to one school over another. I have been so confused
and unsure about what I want to do and where I want to go. I thought time
would help make up my mind but as time went on, I found myself going back
and forth more. I did like UNCC and I wanted to give it a fair chance, I
decided to put myself out there more and try to find things that would make
me want to stay here. I joined the club Emerging Leaders and I also got am
on-campus job in Greek Village. I knew that I could not depend on other
people to make me happy, I had to go out there and find it myself. I needed
to put more effort into UNCC because I know that if I went to Southern I
would just be settling and I wouldnt try.
As back and forth as I have been with my conflict, I think I finally came
down to a decision. Last weekend at the last minute I decided to go visit my

sister. When I was there, I had a lot of fun, I enjoyed myself a lot more then I
thought. If I were to transfer home, I would not be able to go visit Brianna. I
know I would be miserable back home and I would have to start all over
again. I have made a lot of friends here that genuinely care about me. If I
were to transfer home, none of my home friends would even be there, they
would be at their colleges doing their own thing.
I am happy with my choice of coming back next semester. I know at
times (mostly when I am either alone or doing work that I dont want to be) I
will say that I wish I transferred home, but I know right now that I am making
the best decision for myself and my future. Transferring would be hard and I
am doing well here academically. I have recognized that I am comparing
myself too much to my sister and my friends who are at their colleges or
comparing my life here too much to my life back home. I loved high school
and my friends and I have put a lot of pressure on myself to have the same
exact thing here when I now know that will never happen. I have now
realized that I need to start new with a clean slate and stop comparing
college and high school because they are completely different, I am in a new
state, with new people and in a different atmosphere.
The real reason I can do all of this switching around and changing my
mind is because of my parents, they have supported me with everything and
I am very lucky to have them. My perspective has been constantly changing
and has been like a roller coaster ride, but I have realized that my conflict is
helping me grow up. My parents cant make all my decisions for me, I need

to grow up and figure out what I want to do in my future, and it is very scary
realizing that now, but in the long run it is helping me a lot.
I have learned so much about myself in this process of choosing a
college, and I never thought that it would be this difficult and that I would
have so many mixed emotions and feelings. Some people can easily chose a
school, while others have more of a struggle. To me, college is here to help
me grow and find out who I am and receive an education at the same time in
hopes of having a successful future. It is hard, but no matter where you
chose to go, no matter how long you are there, or if you change your mind,
you will be okay and you will be happy. That is why conflicts exist and why
we change our minds, because we realize what does and doesnt make us
happy. Making decisions is difficult, there are a lot of ups and downs, and it
can be confusing and tough. You have to follow your feelings if you want to
be happy and put everything you have into making hard decisions. In the
long run, you have to be smart and think for the future.

US Department for Education. "Back to School Statisitics." National Institute For

Education Statisitics. Institute of Education Sciences, 2014. Web. Jan. 2015.

Process Notes
1. This paper has been much different then any other paper I have
written before. I think that is because the topic I chose is very personal
and has been an ongoing conflict. I have pretty much been in this
conflict of choosing a school for about a year now. I had the conflict of
just choosing a school to then realizing I like it that much to then
analyzing every decision I made about choosing this school to then
deciding if I want to stay. I mention this in my paper but it has been a
roller coaster rides with a lot of ups and downs. I feel that if I had
chosen another conflict to write about that maybe it would be like
other papers but I am happy with choosing this topic because in writing
this I was able to really think about everything that has happened and
everything that I want. I defiantly believe that this paper has helped
me in my decision of deciding to stay here at UNCC next year.
2. I have added a more emotion in my final draft. I have also added I lot
more analysis, if you compare my original version to my final version
you will see that I have a lot more I have realized and I have

learned and I now see that and I believe this in my paper. I have
gone into more detail about my decision-making and where my head
was what was happening as I made those decisions.
3. Ashley helped me and her peer response was great. She asked me
different questions about certain topics. As the reader she say where I
could use help and when she asked me those questions like how did
you feel here and what helped influence that that I closed some
gaps in the writing where the reader could be confused.
4. I wrote a lot and my paper is very long. I have read it over and over
and take stuff out but I feel as though with my topic and because this
paper is about conflict that I shouldnt take out much that has helped
shape my decision making. I feel as though the information in my final
draft is very essential in telling my story and my conflict.
5. My most difficult choice I had to make in revising this would be how to
approach the conclusion. I didnt know what angle I should go from. I
wanted to go along the lines of being happy and the goals of college
and what I wanted to get out of it, but I had a hard time with relating
that back to the three main questions.
6. I would definitely say I am most proud about making a decision of
where to go next year and that decision is staying here! I think writing
this paper has helped me realize that this is an amazing school and
that I really need to try more to be happy. I cant just settle anymore
and expect good things to happen to me, I need to go out and find
things that make me happy. I have found out a lot about myself in this
process and am happy that I chose this topic.