Chapter 3

Improving Writing
Techniques

Formal Research Methods

for Gathering Information

Search manually (books, magazines,

journals).
Access electronically (Internet,
databases, compact discs).
Go to the source (interviews, surveys,
questionnaires, focus groups).
Conduct scientific experiment
(measure variables using control
groups).

Informal Research Methods

for Gathering Information

Look in
organization files.
Talk with your boss.
Interview the
target audience.
Conduct an
informal survey.
Brainstorm for
ideas.

Format
for an
Outline

Tips for Making Outlines

Organizing
Business
Messages

DIRECT STRATEGY
Main idea comes
first followed by
details and explanations

Organizing
Business
Messages

Explanation precedes
main idea

INDIRECT STRATEGY

DIRECT
STRATEGY

Saves readers time

Sets a proper frame of mind
Prevents frustration
Appears businesslike

Advantages
INDIRECT
STRATEGY

Respects feelings of
audience
Encourages a fair
hearing
Minimizes a negative
reaction

Receiver is receptive
Receiver requires no
education about topic
Message is routine

DIRECT
STRATEGY

Useful When

INDIRECT
STRATEGY

Receiver may be upset

Receiver may be hostile
Receiver must be
persuaded or educated
Message is sensitive

Effective Sentences

Complete sentences have subjects

and verbs and make sense
(are capable of standing alone).
subject

verb

Employees send many email

messages.

Clauses also have subjects and

verbs.
Independent clauses can stand
alone
Dependent clauses rely on
dependent clause
independent
clausesindependent
for their
meaning.
clause

When you speak, you reveal

yourself.

Complete
Sentences

Clauses

Phrases

Phrases are groups of related

words without subjects and verbs.
phrase

phrase

In the afternoon, I work at the

mall.

Avoid
sentence
fragments.
Fragment

Even though the pay was low. Many

candidates applied.

Revision:

Even though the pay was low,

many candidates applied.

Fused Sentences

Two candidates applied only one was

hired.

Revisions:
Two candidates applied. Only one was
hired.
Two candidates applied: only one was
hired.

Comma Splice

Many were qualified, Jeff was hired.

Revisions:
Many were qualified. Jeff was hired.
Many were qualified; however Jeff was
hired.

Revise the following to avoid

fragments, run-on sentences, and
comma-splices.
You can create a Webbased job portfolio it will
impress potential
employers.

You can create a Webbased job portfolio: it

will impress potential
employers.

Send a scannable rsum. Send a scannable

When you apply for a job.
rsum when you

apply for a job.

Revise the following to avoid

fragments, run-on sentences, and
comma-splices.

Although technical skills

are important.
Communication skills
are also in great
demand.

Although technical skills

are important,
communication skills are
also in great demand.

College used to be for young College used to be for

people, however many older young people; however
students now seek degrees.

many older students

now seek degress.

Emphasis Through
Mechanics
Underlining:
Which of these methods do you prefer.
Italics and Boldface:
The use of boldface and italics captures
the readers attention.
All Caps:
Get your attention

Dashes:
Other methodsincluding dashesmay be
used.
Tabulation: listing items vertically
emphasizes them:
1) First item
2) Second item
3) Third item

Which of
these other
means of
achieving
mechanical
emphasis
is/are
appropriate in
business
letters?

White space
Color
Lines
Boxes
Columns
Titles
Headings
Subheadings

Which of
these other
means of
achieving
mechanical
emphasis
is/are
appropriate
in memos?

White space
Color
Lines
Boxes
Columns
Titles
Headings
Subheadings

Which of
these other
means of
achieving
mechanical
emphasis
is/are
appropriate
in e-mail
messages?

White space
Color
Lines
Boxes
Columns
Titles
Headings
Subheadings

Which of
these other
means of
achieving
mechanical
emphasis
is/are
appropriate
in reports?

White space
Color
Lines
Boxes
Columns
Titles
Headings
Subheadings

Emphasis and Deemphasis

Through Style
To emphasize an idea

Use a vivid expression, such as lag-free

software rather than dependable
software
Label the idea with expressions such as
more importantly, the principle reason,
or the best alternative.
Put the important idea first or last in a
sentence.
Put the important idea in a simple
sentence or in an independent clause.

To deemphasize an idea

Use general, rather than specific, words

(some customers complained, rather than
125 customers complained).
Place the idea in a dependent clause
connected to an independent clause
containing a positive idea.
Although items cannot be returned for
cash, you
will receive store credit for
any returned purchases.

Active- and
Passive-Voice Verbs
Active-voice verbs show the
subject performing the action.
Most major employers require blood
testing
(Active voice; the subject is acting)

Dr. Smith recommended Tina for the

job
(Active voice; the subject is acting)

In passive-voice sentences, the

subject is being acted upon.
Passive-voice verbs require helper
verbs, such as is and was in these
examples:
Drug Testing is required by most major
employers
(Passive voice; the subject is being acted upon)

Tina was recommended for the job

from Dr. Smith.
(Passive voice; the subject is being acted upon)

Use the active voice for most

business writing.
Use the passive voice too emphasize
an action or the recipient of the
action rather than the actor.
Use the passive voice to break bad
news (Although your lease cannot be
renewed, we can offer . . . ).

Convert the following sentences to

active voice. You may have to add a
subject.

Our membership
The president postponed
meeting was postponed our membership meeting
by the president.

The rsums of job

candidates are sorted
quickly by the software
program Resumix.

The software program

Resumix sorts resumes
of job candidates.

Convert the following sentences to

active voice. You may have to add a
subject.

Computer paper was

ordered yesterday.

Rachel ordered
computer paper
yesterday.

Drug tests are required

of all new employees.

The company requires

drug tests for all new
employees.

Developing Parallelism
Parallel expression results from balanced
con-struction. Match nouns with nouns,
verbs with verbs, phrases with phrases,
and clauses with clauses.

Poor
Training sessions
have been
stimulating and a
challenge.

Parallel
Training sessions
have been
stimulating and
challenging
(match ending of
verbs)

How could parallelism be improved in

the following sentence?
Our knowledge
management system
focuses on the
collecting, storage,
and sharing of best
practices.

Our knowledge
management system
focuses on the
collecting, storing,
and sharing of best
practices.

How could parallelism be improved in

the following sentence?
We are pleased to
recommend
Elizabeth because
she has sincerity,
she is reliable, and
she works with
diligence.

We are pleased to
recommend Elizabeth
because she is
sincere, reliable, and
diligent.

Dangling and
Misplaced Modifiers
For clarity, modifiers must
be close to the words
they describe or limit. Be
particularly careful to
place a logical subject
immediately after an
introductory verbal
phrase.

Poor
By advertising
extensively, all
open jobs were
filled quickly.

Revised
By advertising
extensively, we
filled all open
jobs quickly.

Revise the following sentence to correct any

misplaced modifiers. Retain the introductory
phrase.
To be hired, two years
of experience is
required.

To be hired, one must

have two years of
experience.

Dipped in butter, you

can really enjoy a fine
lobster.

Dipped in butter, a fine

lobster can truly be
enjoyable.

Revise the following sentence to correct any

misplaced modifiers. Retain the introductory
phrase.
By advertising
extensively, all open
jobs were filled quickly.

By advertising
extensively, we filled
open jobs quickly.

After leaving the office,

Jeff's car would not
start.

After leaving the office,

Jeff could not start his
car.

Revise the following sentence to correct

any misplaced modifiers.

To receive an
The sentence is
employment form, fill correct as it stands.
out this application. you is the
understood subject of
(Tricky!)
the sentence.

Three Ways to Achieve

Paragraph Coherence
To help guide your reader or listener
from one thought to another,
develop coherence by using one of
these devices:

Repeat a key idea or key

word(s).
Next month we plan to launch a promotion
for our new website. The promotion will
involve newspaper and TV campaigns.

Use a pronoun.
Considerable interest is now being
shown in our extended certificates of
deposit. They are more profitable when
left on deposit for long periods of time.

Use an appropriate
transitional expression.
Time Association
Before, after, first,
second,
meanwhile, next,
until, when,
whenever

Contrast
CauseEffect
Although
consequently
But
for this reason
However
hence
Instead
therefore
Nevertheless
On the other hand

Additional Idea
furthermore
In addition
Likewise
Moreover
Similarly

Illustration
in this way
for example

TIP: Paragraphs
with eight or fewer
printed lines look
inviting and readable.

Composing the First

Draft

Complete all necessary research

Find a quiet place to concentrate and
work.
Prohibit calls, visitors, and
interruptions.
Organize information using an
outline.
Decide whether to sprint write (get
your thoughts down quickly and
revise later) or revise as you go.
Imagine you are talking to a reader
or a listener.