Daniel Bowen

Section 1 Person Paper

Psychology 1100

The Life of Timmy

Chapter 1
The person I have chosen to write about is my fiction friend Timmy. Timmy has very
loving parents who are very selfless and care for one another. There names are Ricky and
Jessica. They met in St. George as they both were coincidentally swimming at the same pool.
Jessica actually pushed Ricky into the pool as an act of flirting. They were married a year later.
Ricky was 24 and Jessica was 22 when they got married. They continued to live in Utah where
they had grown up. Ricky had a Job as a marketer for Matrix Marketing and did really well
financially as a young adult. The success of Rickys job allowed Jessica to not have to work and
to spend her days being involved in her hobbies and on college work. Ricky and Jessica live a
happy and healthy life as they prepare to have children of there own. They first had a boy named
Chad who quickly became the light of their life and where most of Jessicas time went towards.
They are good people who are very selfless and will do anything to serve another person. Ricky
and Jessica decided to have another child. This next pregnancy didn't go as smoothly as Chads
went. There was nothing majorly bad, just that she felt more sick and had more mood swings
during this pregnancy. Overall, the pregnancy lasted just short of 9 months and then Timmy was
born.

When I was born, my parents told me that they named me Timmy because it was my
mothers great grandfathers name who she admired dearly. I am now 22 years old and know
mostly everything about how the process of development works during a babies birth.
Throughout school and other sources I learned that the process of development from
conception to birth starts with a single cell. The moment of conception a zygote is formed. A
zygote is different than any other cell. It contains genetic material that it gets from other cells.
Eventually that zygote turns into a fetas. Throughout the pregnancy there are three prenatal
development stages. They consist of germinal, embryonic and the fetal stage. Im not going to go
into detail about every different stage but there was some complications throughout the
pregnancy. It was during the fetal stage that takes place from week nine up until the baby is
born. This is when the majority of the growth happens with the fetas. I was told that the
complication was that I didn't grow as much as other babies and was born premature. Even
though it was scary at first it hasn't really had very many side effect on my life today, other than
just being short and small throughout my adolescent years. At this point we were a happy family
that included me, my father, my mother and my older brother. My mother would always tell me
that she would involve me in most activities that the family did so that I could stimulate my
cognitive capacities1. For example, at church she would have me take the bread and water as a
baby so that I could learn the importance of it and form a habit around it. This allowed me to
start thinking and processing what I was actually doing.

1 Berger K. Pg. 115

My life wasn't always easy with a perfect family that never did anything wrong. Actually, after I
was born things got really difficult for my family. My mother and father didn't agree on many
things. This started to create tension in the home. In my teens I became a stressed person and I
believe that it was due to feeling stressed as a child. Stress did affect my developing brain and
could have possibly slowed it down. This happens when a child doesn't feel safe or is always
scared. Neglect can also cause a large amount of stress. Not offering comfort when the child
needs it or when there is a lack of physical touch can cause stress as well2. During this time in
my families life, my mother admitted that she was guilty of these. The contention that was in the
household didn't make me feel comfortable and caused me much stress. As I continued to grow
throughout my childhood I learned that the brain is developing a mode of living built on social
cohesion, cooperation and efficient planning.3 The prefrontal cortex allows a child to think go the
consequence before the child acts. A childs growth is heavily impacted on how the prefrontal
cortex and the limbic system grow. I think these parts of my brain didn't develop they way they
should have and caused a lot of social impairments throughout my life. I have always been
extremely shy and found it very difficult to interact with other people. It shows how important the
growth of a childs brain is during the beginning stages of a childs life.

2 Berger K. Pg. 136 - 137

3 Berger K. Pg. 179

When I turned fourteen my life changed forever. As a child its hard to remember everything so
you have to learn most through what your parents tell you, but during this time I remember
everything that happened and how I felt. My parents decided to get a divorce. This had a very
big impact on me. I always thought that my parents should be able to work through all their
problems and to be able to solve them. With that idea, It brought me comfort and security. When
I found out my parents were getting divorced all that comfort and security was shattered. I
couldn't trust my parents anymore. My father left but kept his job. I stayed with my mother and
she now had to get a job to try and provide for herself and her two kids. By definition, we were
poor at this point. This was extremely hard for me and made me make decisions that weren't the
best. I stopped caring about my school work and started hanging out with the wrong group of
kids. As I grew up with these kids and still hurting from the divorce I got into drugs and drinking.
This is where I would grab my quick pleasure from because It wasn't going to happen through
my family. My dad would still have me and my brother over every other weekend. He loved us
and wanted the best for us, as did my mom. The structure of our family had changed. I was now
being raised by one parent. I felt like I had less behavioral self control, and higher levels of
anger.

Chapter 2
Even though life was hard and I had been angry about the way things were going, my life
changed again. I took a step back and looked at how horrible I had become because of my
parents divorce. I decided right then and there that I needed to surround myself with friends that

were going to have a good impact on my life. Even though it was extremely hard to get out of my
comfort zone and reach out to a group of kids I highly respected, they took me in. Now in
contrast, I was starting to be influence by these peers. I started to go to church with them and
was once again influenced by religion. These were the two greatest influences in my life that
changed me and my attitude towards life. Eventually I went on a 2 year mission for that church
in Mexico. I learned so much about who I was and who I wanted to be. Within these two biggest
changes I got to develop some new identities that set the foundation for my life. I acquired a
relationship identity by the friends I had made. My best friend Brian was so amazing and
influential throughout these young adult years. He would always call me and ask me what I was
up to and If I wanted to do something. I didn't have to do that but he enjoyed being my friend and
really helped me feel important and loved. It was amazing to see someone truly care about me.
This friend among others helped me reach a religious identity as well. I was shocked when I
heard that 55% of high school seniors consider religion important while 20% do not. I decided
that I was going to be part of the 55%.4 What I was learning about became such valuable
knowledge to me. I felt as if I finally had another form of identity concerning who I was, where I
came from and where I am going. I never truly understood myself until I had a confirmation that I
am a child of God. This was very meaningful to me and gave me a sense of purpose.

4 Berger K. Pg. 357

Most importantly, I forgave my parents for putting me through there divorce. I promised myself
that I would always treat my future family the way that I wish my mother and father would have
treated each other. I have seen myself grow and develop even more as Ive healed from my past
experiences. They were really painful at the time but have taught me so much and have
developed me into the man I am today. As my life continued I met someone that once again
would change my life forever. Her name is Allie and I was struck by her the moment I saw her. I
actually met her at a church activity in the middle of the summer. Another relationship was being
formed and this one was much different than that of my friends. I felt a love for her that I cant
really explain and she felt that for me as well. After a while of dating and building our
relationship I started caring a lot about my body image and what she thought of me. I was really
skinny and didn't have much muscle to fill my body out. This wasn't a very big concern but I did
start working out seriously for the first time in my life. I wanted to be confident in myself so that
Allie would be confident in me as well. I didn't realize how big of an impact my body image had
on me. Eventually Allie and I were married the following summer. She meant everything to me
and was now the focus of my life.
With now being newly married I started taking my vocational identity much more
important. I had a wife and a future family to provide for. I had always been interested in what
my father had done with marketing. I loved the enterprising side of things where I could be in
business situations where I could persuade, sale and influence. With his help, My friends and I
started a company called Maxt Marketing. We were all in school but because of such great
mentoring and a healthy relationship building again with my dad we were lead to many great and

wonderful opportunities. My leadership skills grew and I started taking on many roles as a
founder of a company. In about a year our company had exploded and we had each made over
a million dollars that year. My whole life I had always been afraid of providing for a family and
that I wouldn't be able to do it or that I would end up like my parents. I always tried to put my wife
first so that a divorce was never an option and it never was an option all the way throughout our
lives.5 I wanted to have financial freedom so that I could do things I love with my family. I was
extremely blessed by the people I had around me to help me be successful and I thank God
every day for the opportunity that He has given me to be a successful business man, husband
and friend.
In our late 20s, Allie and I had kids who did nothing but made my life complete happiness! This
gave my life even more meaning. I got to watch them grow up and experience life on their own.
As they went through school and would come back with questions and homework I realized I
wasn't very factual and couldn't answer most of their questions. I realized that most of my
intelligence was base being analytical and practical intelligence. I have a level head and usually
can apply things into real life. I never was very smart in school and didn't get very good grades
but when it came to street smarts I was just find and keen how to make relationships and could
have an impact on the people around me. This is what truly helped me to be successful in my
chosen career. Our kids continued to grow up. We had 5 at this point. One was in college, two
were in high school, one was in junior high and the other was in elementary.

5 Berger K. Pg. 410

This was a hard time of life, not any less enjoyable of happy, just harder. I was stuck in
the sandwich generation. My kids had many needs and things that I had to attend to, while my
aging parents who were living separately both needed support and help as well. Not to mention
my mother and father in law as well. I felt as if I had so many people to take of. This caused a lot
of stress in my life and kept all my time occupied. Even though it was hard and stressful I was
able to build relationships with my children and parents more and more. I was spending so much
time with all of them that these relationships were being built naturally. It was a time I will never
forget. I figured that someday my children would be taking care of me and their own children and
families. I am grateful for the time I have had in this life where I could build meaningful
relationships with people. It was a journey and was confusing at times trying to figure out my
identity and who I was. Everyone has the amazing and terrifying opportunity to go through this
and thats what makes life so outstanding.

Reflection This assignment has taught me a lot. The character I chose was indeed fictional but had
a lot of the same characteristics that I had. There was a lot of myself in Timmys life as well as
what I want to achieve later in life. It was really interesting to put a life into perspective to see
what it is that truly influences ones life. I got to see all the different identities that will affect
someones life as well as how different relationships can be such a big part to who someone is.

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