A little wit of heaven X x X aqua's mc chris talks to jayplay writer Robert Perkins on page 13 about star Wars and his upcoming performance at the Bottleneck on March 8.
A little wit of heaven X x X aqua's mc chris talks to jayplay writer Robert Perkins on page 13 about star Wars and his upcoming performance at the Bottleneck on March 8.
A little wit of heaven X x X aqua's mc chris talks to jayplay writer Robert Perkins on page 13 about star Wars and his upcoming performance at the Bottleneck on March 8.
X X X Aqua Teen Hunger Forces mc chris talks to Jayplay writer Robert Perkins on page 13 about Star Wars and his upcom- ing performance at the Bottleneck on March 8. Vol.2 Issue 22 03.03.05 8 10 12 Jayplay Jayplay cellent rated perience Inside Cover photo illustration: Ginny Weatherman SPEAK UP JUST SEND AN E-MAIL TO jayplay @kansan.com or individually, the formula is: (1st initial+last name@kansan.com) or write to Jayplay The University Daily Kansan 111 Stauffer-Flint Hall 1435 Jayhawk Blvd. Lawrence, KS 66045 EDITORAKAQUEENBEE Misty Huber ASSOCIATE EDITOR HATESTAGLINES Liz Beggs CLERKGETSAROUNDTOWN Meredith Desmond DESIGNERSMAKE PRETTYPAGES Emily Homer Joshua Kendall BITE ALWAYSHASTHE MUNCHIES Britta Florman Maha Masud Anja Winikka CONTACT WILL HELPYOUWITHYOURPROBLEMS Ashley Doyle Samara Nazir Erin Shipps MANUAL ISACTUALLYUSEFUL Donovan Atkinson Leigh Ann Foskey Lynn Hamilton NOTICE TAKESNOTE OF IT Robert Perkins Paige Worthy VENUEHASTHE BOOZE ANDTHE BEAT Chris Brown Mandy Hendrix Ashley Michaels COPY EDITOR ATRUE RENEGADE Ross Fitch CREATIVE CONSULTANT KNOWS A LOT Carol Holstead The Jayplayers// 3 4 6 Weekly choice Bite Manual Prepare five-star feasts in your residence hall Student to staff: your guide to finding a job 8 Notice Street-side signs of the cross 9 Bitch + Moan Awkward apartment hunting and foreign loving 10 Feature Skin flicks and dirty magazines: Can you handle it? 12 Venue Dont call them groupies 14 Contact And you thought the sibling squabbles were over 16 Movies, Music, Games Cursed, Motley Cre & Star Fox Assault 19 Speak Wedding bells and marriage hell Editors Notes We want you to use us. No, really this is your magazi ne and your opportunity to share your voice. We want your feedback, whether you love or hate something you read or you just have some story ideas. You know that letter to the editor page you see in a lot of magazines: those letters that drone on and on about how amazing an article was in last months issue and then the occa- sional critical thinker who calls the publication moronic. Yeah, we dont have that page, but we still want to know what youre thinking. Good things come from interac- tion. Three weeks ago, Jayplay reader Stephani e Fi l ardo, Owensville, Mo., junior, called to tell us she wanted to give away her engagement ring from her former fianc. We ran a contest in our Feb. 10 issue asking readers to share their love stories and the reader with the best one would receive the ring. Filardo picked her favorite couple and we announce the winners on page 14. Starting with this issue, well also give you the writers contact informa- tion after each article. The writers are here to entertain you, so if you think an article sucks, let them know. Like- wise, tell the writer if the piece changed your life, you now consider him or her your hero or youre con- structing a shrine in the articles honor. You can also send in your love questions to Bitch + Moan on page 9. Columnists Chris and Jessi give informative answers while trying not to sound like smart-asses. They usu- ally fail. And then theres me. If theres any- thing you want to say but dont know whom to direct it to, you can e-mail me. If its praise, Ill take credit. And if its criticism, Ill make up someone to blame it on. Misty Huber, editor mhuber@kansan.com 03.03.05 Jayplay 3 Thurs 3/3 Ten Mile Tide, Jazzhaus 926 1/2 Massachusetts St., 10 p.m., 21+, $3 National Treasure, Woodruff Audi- torium, Level 5, Kansas Union, 7 p.m. and 9:30 p.m., all ages, $2 or free with SUA Movie Card, runs Thursday and Friday North of Grand/Tipton Blacktop/ Fatal 27th, Boobie Trap Bar, 1417 SW Sixth St., Topeka, 9 p.m., all ages, $5 over 21, $6 under 21 Ragin Hormones, Gaslight Tavern, 401 N. Second St., 7 p.m., all ages Ever We Fall and Drake Equation, Replay Lounge, 946 Massachusetts St., 10 p.m., 21+, $2 Mark Lower Trio and I Dont Do Gentl emen, 1727 McGee St., Kansas City, Mo., 10:30 p.m., 21+, $5 to $10 Jazz Chaos Theory/Wobbly H, The Bottleneck, 737 New Hampshire St., time TBA, 18+ + Fri 3/ 4 Paul Westerberg, Grand Empo- rium, 3832 Main St., Kansas City, Mo., 8 p.m., 21+, $20 George Strait, Kemper Arena, 1800 Genessee St., Kansas City, Mo., 7:30 p.m., all ages, $50.50 to $60.50 First Friday (Live music fol- lowed by open mic), Hawks Nest, Kansas Union, 7 p.m., all ages, free The Esoteri c/ Born from Beneath/Given with Honor/A River Forth, Boobie Trap Bar, 1417 SW Sixth St., Topeka, 9 p.m., all ages, $5 over 21, $6 under 21 Son Venezuela, The Granada, 1020 Massachusetts St., 8 p.m., all ages S. N. M. N. M. N. M. / B- Team, Gaslight Tavern, 401 N. Second St., 10 p.m., all ages Phi l adanco! Contemporary Dance, Lied Center, 1600 Stewart Dr., 7:30 p.m., all ages, Orchestra/Balcony I: $11.50 to $28 Peckinpah/The Hacienda Broth- ers, Daveys Uptown, 3402 Main St., Kansas City, Mo., 10 p.m., 21+ Brunette, The Bottleneck, 737 New Hampshire St., 8:30 p.m., 18+, $3 to $4 North Mississippi All-Stars, The Beaumont Club, 4050 Pennsylvania Ave., Kansas City, Mo., 8 p.m., all ages, $15 Sat 3/5 Little Compas/The Monarch Song/ chasing Paris, Jackpot Saloon, 943 Massachusetts St., 10 p.m. Bill Gaither, Kemper Arena, 1800 Genessee St., Kansas City, Mo., 6 p.m., all ages Placate/Moniker/Knee Deep/ DBLTAP (Luke Paine Benefit), Boobie Trap Bar, 1417 SW Sixth St., Topeka, 9 p.m., all ages, $5 over 21, $6 under 21 Concerts at the Li ed: 28th Annual KU Jazz Festival with John Abercrombie and the KU Jazz Ensemble I, Lied Center, 1600 Stewart Dr., 7:30 p.m., all ages, $15 adults, $10 students/seniors The 2005 Benefit Sports Auction presented by the Lawrence St. Patricks Day Parade Commit- tee, Liberty Hall, 644 Massachusetts St., 6 p.m., $5 Black Pool Lights, Dead Girls Rui n Everythi ng and Jason McGee, Replay Lounge, 946 Massa- chusetts St., 10 p.m., 21+, $2 Via Satellite, 1727 McGee St., Kansas City, Mo., 10:30 p.m., 21+, $5 to $10 Tishamingo/Big Metal Rooster, The Bottleneck, 737 New Hampshire St., 10 p.m., 18+, $7 Sun 3/6 Hacienda Brothers / Rhythm Busters, Jackpot Saloon, 943 Mass- achusetts St., 10 p.m. Kings of Leon, The Beaumont Club, 4050 Pennsylvania Ave., Kansas City, Mo., 8 p.m., all ages, $15 Anchondo / Supernauts / The Vel- vet Hammers / Ludo, Boobie Trap Bar, 1417 SW Sixth St., Topeka, 8 p.m., all ages, $5 over 21, $6 under 21 Student Ensembl e Seri es: I nstrumental Col l egi um Musicum, Swarthout Recital Hall, Murphy Hall, 1530 Naismith Dr., 7:30 p.m., free Firescape / National Fire Theory / Too Beautiful to Die, El Torreon Ballroom, 3101 Gillham Plaza, Kansas City, Mo., 7 p.m., all ages The Wandering Eye Band, Har- bour Lights, 1031 Massachusetts St., 21+, 10 p.m., $2 Mon 3/7 Laurie Garret, Woodruff Audito- rium, Level 5, Kansas Union, 5:30 p.m., all ages, free Student Ensembl e Seri es: Undergraduate Honors Recital, Swarthout Recital Hall, Murphy Hall, 1530 Naismith Dr., 7:30 p.m., free Tues 3/8 From Aqua Teen Hunger Force presents mc chris, The Bottleneck, 737 New Hampshire St., 9 p.m., 18+, $8 Tom Russell, Daveys Uptown, 3402 Main St., Kansas City, Mo., 8 p.m., 21+, $15 Wed 3/9 Jonathan Bentley / Buttermilk Boys, Daveys Uptown, 3402 Main St., Kansas City, Mo., 8 p.m., 21+, $5 Javiva Magness, Grand Empo- rium, 3832 Main St., Kansas City, Mo., 8 p.m., 21+, $8 For a complete list of events, visit www.kansan.com weekly choice C o u r t e s y
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w w w . r o o t s - a n d - b r a n c h e s . c o m Tom Russell Kings of Leon The Hacienda Brothers 4Jayplay 03.03.05 Saygoodbye to takeout menus and daily trips to Lewis Hall, and hello to gour- met goodness. With a little creativity and concocting, eating well in your room is not only possible; its downright doable. Nuke-lear war Andrea Bridges, Lewis Hall resident, cant be bothered with hopping on an elevator down to Mrs. Es dining hall. The Lenexa sophomore decided that after spending last semester eating there twice a day, she needed a break from on-campus eateries. But living in the residence halls without an oven limits her cooking capacity. Though its the reigning royalty of cooking, the oven now has some definite competition for the leading position in food prepara- tion. The microwave is the new oven, Bridges says. Its where the real cooking goes on. Using a microwave is probably the quick- est and easiest way to prepare food in a hall room. Its also one of the only heating devices allowed in the halls, says Nick Dormer, Topeka sophomore and resident assistant for the fourth floor of Lewis Hall. With the restrictions on different appli- ances nothing with an open heating device is allowed it seems like students must surrender themselves to a life of Ramen noodles. However, microwaves are capable of whipping up more than just TV dinners. Bridges uses hers to make instant mashed potatoes, grits and even scrambled eggs. She says its easy: Just crack an egg into a bowl, season, add cheese if you want, stir, cook for 30 sec- onds, stir, cook for another 30 to 45 sec- onds and its finished. If you want to cook more than nuke, cre- ating a more home- made style meal is possible. Carolyn Dodson, of www.goodnuke.com and author of Defini- tive Microwave Cookery, says to think of your microwave as a stove, with many temperature settings to cook different types of food. For instance, a 450- degree setting on a stove is equivalent to 100 percent, or HIGH power, on a microwave. A medium setting on a microwave, perfect for cooking most foods, is 50 percent power, or 325 to 350 degrees on a conventional range. She rec- ommends cooking things a little under- done, as 25 percent of cooking occurs after the microwave stops. And what are Dod- sons final words of microwave wisdom? Dont let that little tin box intimidate you! Although its possible to go all out and make complete meals in the microwave, Bridges, Lewis Hall resident, warns that using fresh ingredients is a lit- tle risky because of limited shelf space in small dorm-size refrigerators and quick expiration dates. She and Dormer, Lewis Hall RA, both suggest using kitchen facil- ities located in many of the halls if you need to use some kind of open heating apparatus. All you need to do is check out a key and bring your own pots and pans. Its whats inside that counts What you put into the food, rather than how you prepare it, is often what makes a meal gourmet. A simple sandwich can go from blah to bravo with just a little effort in the grocery store. Instead of going straight for the processed meats and cheeses la Oscar Meyer, why not visit the deli counter and ask for some sun-dried tomato basil turkey with smoked Gouda cheese slices? And opt for more interesting greens than just plain iceberg. Try using baby spinach or mixed greens that include romaine let- tuce or arugala, a peppery tasting variety of leafy green, which are available in ready-to-eat bagged salads. Experiment- ing with different ingredients and spices is often the key to making something more impressive, Bridges says. Even pasta can be made fancy: Targets Archer Farms brand has different varieties of pasta avail- able, such as cracked black pepper linguini and roasted garlic rotelle. Boil the noodles in the microwave and top with a jarred alfredo sauce instead of your regular mari- nara. The bottom line: Dont think that because you dont have a kitchen in your room, you cant create a delicious, homemade gour- met-style meal. Explore new ingredients and dont be afraid to think outside of the microwave box. You just might have peo- ple start walking to your room instead of going to Mrs. Es. mmasud@kansan.com Dorm-made Sans kitchen? So what! Grub on good food, even in your residence hall room Many students feel limited by their cooking options while living on campus. The microwave can offer students fine dining if used correctly. Photo by Kit Leffler By Maha Masud, Jayplay writer gourmet Morningstar Farms Veggie Crumbles are a vegetarian alternative for ground beef. Its made from soy products, so its low in fat and carbohydrates and takes only sec- onds to prepare in a microwave, making it a great, quick substitute for many recipes that require ground beef. Place a serving in a bowl, spice it up with some taco seasoning, nuke it in the microwave for 30-45 seconds and add to a tortilla with some cheese, lettuce, and salsa. Youve got yourself a soft taco in two minutes! A quickshortcut to making tacos { Tuna Pasta For One Make this low-fat, full-flavor dish with minimal ingredients for a quick delight. Mix a side salad to include more nutrients in your meal. 12 ounces dry rotini pasta 8 ounce can of tuna 1/3 cup chopped red onion 2 tablespoons fresh parsley, minced 2 tablespoons fresh lemon juice pinch of back pepper one head of broccoli 1/2 cup olive oil and red wine vinegar, whisked together 1/4 cup shredded Parmesan cheese Boil water and add pasta. While the pasta is cooking, combine the tuna with onion, parsley, lemon juice and black pepper, in a medium-sized bowl. Really, you can vary the flavors and herbs, but this makes a fresh, tasty combination. Add broccoli florets to the cooking pasta a couple minutes before the pasta is done. Make sure pasta and broccoli are both cooked to your satisfaction, and drain pasta and broccoli in a colander. Stir cooked pasta into tuna mixture and drizzle with the oil and vinegar mixture to taste. Mix again to coat tuna and pasta. Top with the shredded pamesan cheese. Leftovers are just as delicious chilled. Britta Florman Jeffersons Restaurant 743 Massachusetts St. (785) 832-2000 From its famous hot wings to its juicy burgers and golden breaded oysters, Jeffersons Restaurant serves plenty of good southern food. Dollar bills signed with magic markers line the walls and with four big screen TVs, you can easily watch KU basketball games from any seat in the place. Price Range: Appetizers start at the $2.50 Basket O Fries and up to the $7.25 Combo plate with cheese sticks, mush- rooms, corn nuggets and onion rings. Sandwiches, served with a pickle spear and your choice of fries, coleslaw, barbe- cue beans or pasta salad, are all about $6. Booze Availability: Jeffersons carries more than 24 bottled beers and offers drink specials every day of the week. Thurs- days are $1 draws and $5 pitchers, and Fridays are $2 wells. Attire: Casual. Jeffersons is a sports bar: the servers wear T- shirts and jeans and you can too. Date-worthy: Not really. The music is a little loud and you are expected to use paper towels as napkins. So if youre looking for something fancy, this is not your place. But if youre looking for a fun, friendly atmosphere, Jeffersons is your place. *Jeffersons waitress Amity File, Beloit senior, says that the wings and burgers are the most popular. You can get $0.30 wings on Wednesdays, Sundays and KU game days. Burgers are $4.50 on Mondays. Anja Winikka Stat Super short supper CrossPointe Church Dr. Beau Abernathy Watch Channel 19 Tuesday 7:30, Friday 8:00 Student Transportation Available Call 331-2704 Meeting @ Bishop Seabury Academy 4120 Clinton Pkwy. Across from Legends Apts. www.crosspointeonline.net | download sermons purpose driven student ministries Building strong & healthy marriages Sundays @ 9:30am Couple series for the engaged & young marrieds Contemporary Worship Venue Sundays @ 10:30am te]o+e A]!e+ o: ;o J oo.... !e++e+te +!1 curvesinternational.com Over 8,000 locations worldwide. *No travel/transfer privileges. Membership includes service fee. Valid only at participating locations. Not valid with any other promotional offer. Take a 30-minute study break. Finally, a place to work out that fits a small student budget and a busy student schedule. Curves is 30-minute fitness, commonsense weight loss, and all the support you need to achieve your goals. 000-000-0000 Local Address Local Address 000-000-0000 Local Address Local Address 000-000-0000 Local Address Local Address 000-000-0000 Local Address Local Address 000-000-0000 Local Address Local Address 000-000-0000 Local Address Local Address 000-000-0000 Local Address Local Address 000-000-0000 Local Address Local Address 000-000-0000 Local Address Local Address 000-000-0000 Local Address Local Address 000-000-0000 Local Address Local Address 000-000-0000 Local Address Local Address 000-000-0000 Local Address Local Address 000-000-0000 Local Address Local Address 000-000-0000 Local Address Local Address 000-000-0000 Local Address Local Address 000-000-0000 Local Address Local Address 000-000-0000 Local Address Local Address 000-000-0000 Local Address Local Address 000-000-0000 Local Address Local Address 841-1431 Holiday Plaza : 25th & Iowa Lawrence, KS 66047 I arrived early and read over the ques- tions I printed out from the University Career Centers Web site, www.ku.edu/~uces. I was a little nervous, but not too bad. I decided my black pants and teal blouse were professional enough and I was ready to get it over with. My finalized rsum, which was printed on gray granite paper, lay in the chair next to me. Once I went in, I was enthusiastic and full of confidence. I knew how to answer every question and I dont think I stumbled over my words too badly. Overall, I thought it was a good first interview, but I didnt get the job. Thats because it was a mock interview offered by the University Career Center. But it sure felt real. Do Your Research The mock interview is only one of the services the University Career Center offers. Its also only one of the steps you should take when preparing for the job market. Susan Engle, one of the owners of Englewood Florist, 1011 Massachu- setts St., says job candidates should research the company that is interview- ing them. She says job candidates should know exactly what the company does and needs so they can sell themselves to the company through an interview. She says job candidates must be able to state exactly what they can do for the com- pany, whether its through sales or by providing excellent customer service. Youre selling yourself to that com- pany, Engle says. You should be able to say, I can do x, y, z for you. Be Prepared David Gaston, director of University Career Services, recommends preparing for an interview the way you prepare an essay: organize it with an introduction, body and conclusion. The introduction responds to the typical first statement, Tell me about yourself. Here you want to include specific reasons why you are a good fit for the company. In the body of the essay, provide anecdotes showing your skills and qualities that prove your qualifications for the position and for the company. Your conclusion tells inter- viewers what you want them to remem- ber about you. Gaston also says job candidates should be able to effectively communi- cate what skills and qualities they bring to an employer. The interview is a time to close the sale, Gaston says. Knock Em Dead Enterprise Rent-A-Car hires more col- lege graduates than any other company in the United States and estimates to hire 7,000 college graduates this upcoming year. We look for candidates who pos- sess integrity, honesty, leadership ability and a desire to grow professionally, says Shelley Flones, recruiting supervi- sor of Enterprise Rent-A-Car in Kansas City, Mo. Team players with a strong desire to provide exemplary customer service are an ideal fit. Flones says appearance is very impor- tant at an interview. Even if the company environment is casual or business casual, job candidates should dress to impress. She recommends a conserva- tive suit that is clean, neat and pressed to make the right first impression. Flones also recommends that job can- didates practice their answers to decrease nervousness. She says they should identify the skills that are impor- tant to the position and find specific examples of situations when they have demonstrated those skills. A job candi- dates inability to discuss specific situa- tions and their outcomes is a common mistake, Flones says. She suggests job candidates find exact situations that demonstrate their skills instead of speak- ing about them generally. For example, dont hesitate to mention the time you covered for your boss at the movie theater while he was out of town or when you gave the Heimlich to a girl choking on a french fry. Whatever the sit- uation, make sure to highlight it. lhamilton@kansan.com None of us wants to eat Ramen noodles forever. Heres how to trade in your backpack and flip-flops for big bucks and first jobs. 6Jayplay 03.03.05 Get hired Photo by Kit Leffler Although appearance may be the least important part of a person's qualifications for a job, it does affect the first impression of a potential employer. By Lynn Hamilton, Jayplay writer Prepared Jayhawks I asked these students what they have done to prepare themselves for job interviews. Anthony Brown, Grandview, Mo. sen- ior: I went to University Career Servi- ces and had them look at my rsum and cover letter. I also had a mock inter- view and had informational interviews with different professional employers. Shannon Cline, Wichita senior: I have been working to put together my portfolio and make sure it is ready to present to potential employers. I have also picked up information from Career Services about job interviewing tips. Quick fix Nothing is more disappointing than pulling your favorite wool sweater out of the dryer two sizes smaller than when you put it in. Whether you forgot to read the label or just didnt sort your laundry, there is hope. Mix 2 tablespoons of baby shampoo into a sink full of warm water and soak the sweater for about 15 minutes to relax the wool fibers. Without rins- ing, roll the sweater in a towel to remove as much of the water as possible. Spread the sweater on a large corkboard. If you dont have one, a hard sur- face will do fine. Stretch it to the correct shape and size, reshaping every few hours until the sweater is dry. By the end of the day your wool will be good as new. Source: www.ehow.com Leigh Ann Foskey S w e a t e r
s h r i n k a g e Assembly Blinds are a great way to keep peep- ing Toms from looking through your windows, but they arent perfect when it comes to keeping out sun- light. Theres still enough space between the slats to let in some light, which can ruin your chances of sleeping in. To keep out the sun, try putting up curtains. You can always make your own. Dont worry about cost, installation or your lack of sewing skills. To make your own curtains, take some fabric or a bed sheet and lay a tension rod about five inches from one end. Fold the short end over the rod and use fabric glue or bonding tape such as Stitch Witchery, which is available for about $5 at sewing sup- ply stores, to secure the fabric. Cut the fabric up the middle if you want to cre- ate panels. Be sure to measure your window so youll have the proper dimensions before you buy anything. Donovan Atkinson required The sunll come out tomorrow, so block it out For Tickets Call: 785.864.2787 Buy On-line TDD: 785.864.2777 Upon Request
www.lied.ku.edu
The Lied Center
of Kansas Universityof Kansas 785.864.2787 Dazzling dance at its best ... Friday, March 4 7:30 p.m. Philadanco! ... Performers whose blazing physicality and commitment light up the stage. Village Voice The Philadelphia Dance Company Coffee & Conversation with the Artists after the performance. VIP Sponsor Half-Price Tickets for KU Students! THISIS A CH - - CH. The sign caught my attention just as my little green car zoomed past a nondescript brick church on Massachusetts Street, but I knew very well I couldnt just stop in the middle of the road to get a closer look. WHATS MISSING? UR! It was maddening. The sign was behind me in the blink of an eye, and every time I read it I saw UR as Errr, something like the sound I made when I finally figured it out. In the end, I had to drive past Central United Methodist Church six or seven times before I deciphered the wit hidden in those lines. The Rev. Denise Hygh, pastor at Central United Methodist, 1501 Massachusetts St., says the sign is out there for just that reason: to make people curious and invite them inside. She says the church rarely used the sign before she came six months ago. When she saw how busy Mass Street was and what a great evangelism tool the sign could be, she says she made a com- mitment to be more open and inviting to passersby, even if it meant just getting them inside to ask about the message or an upcoming event. She says the signs mes- sage changes as often as every two weeks, depending on whats going on at the church. Its a clever way of talking about God, she says. Central United Methodist and Victory Bible Church, 1942 Massachusetts St., are two churches in the Lawrence area that use their outdoor signage to display thought-provoking messages as well as event announcements. Any church with the income to purchase a signoften $4,000 or morecould have one, though. Not only are they clever, but theyre also a way to bring new people in without expending a lot of manpower, says Aaron Ketchell, lecturer in religious and Ameri- can studies. Churches that receive govern- mental financial support in countries such as France have no risk of closing. But in America, he says, you have to do certain things to stay afloat. He says the catchy signs are as much about marketing and keeping churches in the black as they are about spreading reli- gion to new people. He says most sociolo- gists of religion would agree that many mainstream churches are losing mem- bers. Theres a certain art to preaching captivating the congregation is part of it that conservative churches make part of their style and allure, he says. The signs are a way for mainstream Christian churches to attract people in potentially large numbers without a huge marketing team. But that isnt to say conservative churches dont use them too. Ketchell says the content of each churchs sign is deter- mined by how its members think of what it means to be a religious person. In his experience, conservative churches tend to focus their signage on working toward get- ting into Heaven. He says one that sticks out in his memory as one part hilarity, one part fire and brimstone is, IF YOU DONT WANT TO BURN IN HELL, YOURE GOING TO NEED SON-BLOCK. Clearly, signs messages can range from the funny and brain teasing to the thought- provoking or fear-inspiring. Thats where authors such as Jim Harvey come in. He was inspired to write 701 Sentence Ser- mons: Attention-Getting Quotes for Church Signs, Bulletins, Newsletters, and Sermons when he was put in charge of the sign at a church in Maryland, where he lived at the time. He composed and com- piled the little messages for several years until he had enough to publish in a book. He makes some of them up and collects the rest from television, radio, magazines, books and anywhere else he sees some- thing inspirational or witty. He says churches can use the phrases to reach out to their drive-by congregations in addi- tion to regular visitors and members. Harvey, who now lives in Caledonia, Mich., says he receives feedback from peo- ple on a regular basis, proof that his sen- tence sermons are working their magic. He recently got a message from a family saying they drive by his church sign every Monday and that it has become the subject of conversation during their family dinner. Central United Methodists Rev. Hygh says her churchs sign, which sometimes has a creative message and sometimes just announces events, attracts new visitors every week, most recently to the Ash Wednesday service on Feb. 9. Even in my own experience, in the summer of 2000, the same summer that X-Men was released, I drove past a church on Rainbow Boulevard in Westwood with a sign that read JESUS: THE ORIGINAL X-MAN. I didnt see the parallel and I wasnt quite sure what the church was getting at, but it still brought a smile to my face. I never imagined that four words on a church sign would brighten my workdays consistently for two months, but they did. I dont go to church. Im not even sure what my religious beliefs are. Yet I always drive a little slower down Mass Street to see what the signs in front of those churches will say that day. That sign is doing its job. It even got me interested. pworthy@kansan.com 8Jayplay 03.03.05 By Paige Worthy, Jayplay writer A Presbyterian church sign in Steelville,Mo in September 2004 reaches out to drug addicts and interested passersby alike. Photo by Josh Kendall ad agents Gods From catchy one-liners to provocative statements, churches have found another way to preach the gospel without saying a word. Not to make you all scared, but were eavesdropping on your conversations. Yes, we hear everything. And then we print it. But dont worry if you say something stupid, we wont identify you unless you owe us money or beer. w [Oh, you guys say some of the darndest things. ] Wescoe wit Girl 1: Do you know some skank namedoh I forgot, shes fat and has curly hair? Guy 1: Uh, no. Girl 2: Well she hooked up with my roommate. Guy 1: No way. Girl 1: I hear shes on crack now. Guy 1: Whens your birthday? Guy 2: Next Monday. Guy 1: Nuh uh, youre birthday isnt Valentines Day. Guy 2: Dont ask if you dont want to hear. Guy 1: Man thats gonna suck when you getoh wait, youll probably never get married. Guy1: (Walking with girl) Guy 2: (Trips guy 1 from behind) Guy 1: What the heck?! Hey man, these are my new sneaks! Guy 2: Oh, sorry dude. Guy 1: You should be. The late Sparky, the squirrel who hopped in a trans- former on Feb. 23 and killed power on campus for a cou- ple of hours Erin May, Olathe junior Q: Who would play you in a movie about your life? Erin: Claire Danes. I was obsessed with My So-Called Life. Sparky: Rocky the Flying Squirrel. Oh yeah, in my movie, Id be able to fly and be best friends with a stupid moose. Q: Whats your favorite night spot in Lawrence? Erin: The back porch of the Jazzhaus. Ive participated in illegal activities out there. Sparky: A nice, quiet tree overlooking Clinton Lake. Well, or maybe the Wheel. Sometimes the drunk kids drop their pizza crust and I get a late-night snack. Five questions Q: If you had to eat the same meal for the rest of your life, what would it be? Erin: Thanksgiving dinner, made by my grandma. Only the turkey would have to be substituted with Tofurkey, now that Im a vege. Sparky: Clusters cereal, Planters peanuts and beef jerky. Or anything I could steal from birds. What bands music would you destroy and scrap from history forever? Erin: Theres so many to choose! The genre of Sum 41whiny, my- dad-hates-me, I-cant-get-a-date-in- junior-high music. Sparky: Alvin and the Chipmunks. They give neighborhood rodents everywhere a bad name. My voice never sounded that high and obnox- ious. Q: Whats your biggest pet peeve? Erin: Small repetitive noises and white dairy productsnot neces- sarily together. Sparky: Sometimes Id be crossing the street and people would speed up when they saw me in the middle of the road annoying! Paige Worthy One KU famous, one KU not (yet) famous By Jessi Crowder and Chris Tackett Are you in love with a bitch? Q. Two of my friends were planning on living together next year, and another one of our friends assumed shed be living with us too, because she mentioned how we should go apartment-hunting soon. I didnt know what to say, so I just played it off. How should we break it to her that we werent planning on living with her? Courtney, freshman Chris: I too have friends who are great people, but would be terrible to live with! Just kidding. I dont have friends. But if I did and forgot to tell one of them that I would rather make her cry than let her live with me, heres what Id do. First, figure out the gentlest way to break the bad news. Then tell her as a group. Things might be tense for a week or so, especially while she tries to find an alternative place to live. Maybe she could find an apartment in your same building? Jessi: The next time she mentions apartment hunting, explain to her your dilemma, or rather, her dilemma of finding new friends that wont ditch her. It would also be considerate of you to mention she needs to find a new apartment with those new friends. Q a Ive fallen in love with this girl who isnt the greatest person most of the time. She is wonderful when she is around me and we have a great time together, but we are not dating. She tells me she doesnt want a boyfriend, but then she goes and sleeps with her ex. What should I do? A.C.,junior Q a Jessi: If you cant see the woman you love as wonderful all the time, is she really worth it to you? Its probably true she doesnt want a relationship with you, but it definitely appears she wants some- thing with her ex. Trust me when I say there are women who will think youare the greatest person ever, and as an added bonus, they wont diddle their exes. Yea! Chris: From what youve said, it sounds like she just isnt into you. When certain exes have an established sexual history, its often tempting to settle on sex with them than going through the process of starting something new. For your situation, this blows. Id make out with one of her friends and if she gets jealous, shes yours for the taking. Not really. I am an international student and so far, I am discovering college life at KU rather bleak, if not unbearable. The only consolation for me at KU is seeing all the beautiful girls on campus. I find myself attracted to the American girls here. I have never been with an American girl and find it hard to strike up a conversation. It would be a shame to go back home without experiencing some sort of cross-cultural romance. Any advice? Fez,sophomore Q a Got a burning question? E-mail us at bitch@kansan.com Erin Shipps Jessi: I suggest you go to parties with hot tubs and say things like would you like to touch.. my penis? and I am a sex machine in a really hot accent. No, seriously, just approach the girl. Chris: College life at KU is bleak. ITS WINTER! Once spring comes around, American girls get all slutty and wear skimpy little outfits and cute tops. And theyll sleep with anybody that feigns interest. This is where you come in. Figure out a clever way to start a conver- sation. Try Im lost. Where is this nations capital? or My home- work is hurting me. Hows yours? Shell laugh and you can smoothly say Ha ha, Im joshing you! Im actually not lost and sim- ply trying to score with your hot American ass. Myboyfriend during freshman year had 100 gigabytes of pornography on his computer. To put this in perspec- tive, most computers dont even come with 50 gigs of total space, but my ex was able to store 100 gigs of random people screwing. If you had asked what my opin- ion on watching pornographic material was before this revelation, I would have said that it was a harmless and healthy activity. But since my discovery, an end- less number of questions keep going through my head. Is there such a thing as too much porn? Can porn alter your views on sex? Can it influence your views of the opposite sex? Or is pornography absolutely harmless and Ive been worry- ing for nothing? Addiction In less than one year, Matthew Pool says he not only started watching porn, but also became addicted to it. What started out as something to watch with a group of guys a couple times a month turned into something the Lawrence sophomore had to watch daily to get his fix. It got to the point where porn that used to excite him became dull. The positions, the plots, the orgasms. . .they were all the same. So Pool started increasing the intensity levels of the pornography he watched from the soft-core porn on HBO to the more hardcore until he ran out of choices. Pool says pornography became repetitious and boring. But even though the steamy action never changed, he had to keep watching it because it had become his outlet and he needed that release. Pool also avoided relationships during this time. He didnt need one; porn was his new girlfriend. This is one of the symptoms of porn addictions, says Lawrence certified sex therapist Dennis Detweiler. If you are watching porn for an orgasm, thats OK. But if youre watching it to have an orgasm that you should be having with a partner, thus substituting porn for a rela- tionship, he says you have a problem. The term p o r n a d d i c t i o n h a s become By Ashley Doyle, Jayplay writer The ins and outs of pornography; the people who love and hate it Photo by Kit Leffler M e n W o m e n something used too carelessly in our society, he says. Pornography addiction has nothing to do with how much porn you watch, but rather how you psychologically handle watching it. Someone could be watching pornography one time a month and be mis- using it, Detweiler says. On the other hand, people could be watching it daily and be per- fectly fine. Couples Pornography can be fabulous. Not only is it a safe fantasy alternative, but Detweiler says it also can be a fun way for couples to enhance their sex lives. Pornography can be educa- tional because it can broaden peoples con- ceptual levels of sex and possibly make them more open to sexual activity. Matt, Overland Park senior, who prefers not to give his last name, says pornography can be healthy for couples because it can offer them new ideas along with getting them in the mood. He says he likes to watch porn with his partners as a foreplay device and then turns it off before sex. While pornography can be good for cou- ples, its important that both partners are comfortable with the concept of pornogra- phy. If someone is more conservative, maybe raised in a home where sex is taboo, pornography probably just complicates things, Matt says. Detweiler says that cou- ples who have clashing views on porn can wind up in a never-ending battle. If your part- ner thinks pornography is wrong, then your partner will see you as an addict every time you watch it. An attractive porn star with breast implants helps feed the insecurity many women have about porn, says Laura Wade, co-host of KJHKs O!, a show for women about sex. Men are watching the film thinking, This is hot, I want to try this in bed, and women are thinking, Hes touching himself to her, Wade says. She says this problem arises because men and women watch porn differ- ently. Hes not thinking about how the porn star is so much hotter than his girlfriend, she says. Wade suggests that couples find a video together to ease the insecurity. This way they can choose a video they are both comfortable with. Real life While pornography can broaden the viewers sex life, it can often also set up unre- alistic ideas about sex. When Mark, Overland Park senior who also doesnt want to use his last name, doesnt just watch porn; he studies it. I think porn focuses on what appeals to the stereotypical male porn-watcher, Mark says. It assumes I want to have anal sex with a large-breasted dumb blonde with long fin- gernails and high-heeled shoes. When he downloaded Best Porn of 2003, he noticed that all 12 clips at some point featured a cou- ple having anal sex. Its easy to see how this is unrealistic: If you sampled 12 couples, its doubtful that all of them have had anal sex with each other, Mark says. Viewers often get these unrealistic ideas about how a sexual relationship should be and how an orgasm works, Detweiler says. Watch any porn film and youll see the fantasy world porn offers, where women start to have an orgasm after the first five seconds and dont stop until the man ejaculates on them. Detweiler says a problem with pornography is that people cant separate fantasy from reality. Mark separates the two worlds by using pornography solely as a masturbation aid. With pornography, the male is fucking the girl on camera, Mark says. They are not making love. Theyre not passionate. Marks pornography and his sex life do not inter- twine. When Mark has sex, he wants his part- ner barefoot, smart and small-breasted, but most of all, he wants sex with feelings. Detweiler says pornography can also make you visually dependent. Fantasy is healthy. But when a person watches too much pornography, he can become dependent on that visual aid because his imagination cant cut it anymore. The other gender Women are sexually objectified daily, and pornography helps to encourage those images, says Ann Cudd, director of womens studies. I think that men who engage in pornography are exerting male privilege and women who engage in it are being co-opted into participating in the oppression of women, Cudd says. This oppression, she says, reduces womens status as thinkers and people with dignity, rights and feelings. When Pool stopped watching porn, he says he started seeing changes in himself. He says he started disrespecting women during his addiction, seeing them as sex objects instead of people. Since he stopped watching pornography, Pool says he has noticed his view of women shifting back to how it used to be: seeing them as people first. Wade, the O! co-host, says even though shes a womens studies major, she doesnt see the harm in pornography. She says women are objectified in porn, but men are too, and thats something that people tend to forget. Everyone in pornography is a sexual creature, she says. Cold turkey Pool acknowledges that pornography is one of his weaknesses. He even acknowl- edges that he has a slip-up once in awhile. His friends still watch pornography, which can sometimes be difficult, but Pool has learned to go into the other room when theyre watch- ing videos. To him, its all a matter of adjusting to his new lifestyle. Detweiler, the sex therapist, says deleting the porn from your computer may not be enough. Addicts use porn to meet their emo- tional needs, so he recommends therapy or a 12-step program to help them discover what theyre lacking. Pool discovered his need was faith. So he shifted his attention to Christian- ity. Pool says during his addiction he had a lot of questions that Christianity answered. The needs an addict has can be a variety of things, whether its finding a focus on family or a rela- tionship. Detweiler says the stress is on find- ing a focus that is important to you. So did I overreact when it came to my exs 100 gigs of porn? Maybe a little. While pornography can be healthy for couples and individuals, you have to be comfortable with it. And I wasnt comfortable with him watching it. Whether he was obsessed with porn is not the point. I learned something about myself. And while I think pornography has its benefits, I believe that porn should come in small doses. As for my ex, it still comes in large ones. To test the approval of couples when it comes to pornogra- phy, I walked up to 40 random men and 40 random women and asked them if they would care if their partner watched porn. Here are the results. Or 32.5 percent, said they would care. By the numbers Or 63.6 percent, said they would not care. Said while they wouldnt care, they didnt want to know anything about their partner watching porn. Or 20 percent, said they would care. Or 80 percent, said they would not care. Said they would care, but changed their minds because they said they watched porn and didnt want to be hypocrites. Looked at me, nodded, smiled and then said, Thats hot. XXXXXXXXXXXXXX Pornography: Friend or Foe? Pornography can be healthy for the single indi- vidual. But if your signifi- cant other masturbates to porn, you could feel infe- rior, like with body image. If the couple is mutually com- fortable with pornography, then it can be beneficial. Julie Shrack, Lawrence senior If it makes you happy, go for it. Sex can wait; masturbate. No one ever got pregnant having sex with them- selves. Kalynn Bradley, Olathe freshman I would say that people who watch pornography are creating demands that may not be met in reality. Hollie Porter, Gardner senior Its one of those friends that gets on your nerves occasionally. It can be great, especially in art, but it can also be harmful. I think its harmful because it inhibits your ability to use your imagination to fantasize, just like other addic- tions. Matt Stambaugh, Hutchinson sophomore I think its very detrimental to your health for a lot of rea- sons. Im a Christian and Jesus said Lusting and com- mitting the act are the same thing. And it messes up your mind and you start losing respect for people. Chris Carter, Kansas City, Kan. sophomore adoyle@kansan.com 12Jayplay 03.03.05 it from the people behind the scenes: Music is hard work. An entire business surrounds music that involves a small army of promoters, managers and venue owners who bring you the music you love. The business of music, or more aptly titled music management, has its rewards. The Manager On Anything but Joeys tour two years ago, members of the two opening bands almost beat up band manager Misty Roberts when she tried to pay them at a venue in Omaha, Neb. Angry from feeling like they werent being paid enough money for their opening performances, the high-school aged musicians sought retribution in the form of physical vio- lence against Roberts. They felt like it was their show, Roberts says. The boys threatened her and tempers flared on both sides. In the end, though, nothing happened other than the bruising of a few egos. Roberts lists this incident as one of the funnier disasters to come out of Anything but Joeys tour log. Another disaster that was not so funny came a year laterthis past fallwhen the bands van broke down in Washington, D.C., during the East Coast leg of their national tour. A series of costly events culminated when the band flew their mechanic in from Kansas City, Mo. The band thought the cost of the necessary repairs would be cheaper in the hands of someone who had previously worked on the van. Roberts says this experience nearly ruined the final tour for Anything but Joey who, despite nine years of touring, still made little more than was needed to cover gas to get from one gig to the next. When things like that happen, Im thinking, its very possible were going to get this fixed and chuck this tour and go home, Roberts says. Through these and other trials on the road, Roberts has seen what it takes to successfully manage a band. The 28-year old former KU student had an ear for music and business sensibilities that nat- urally led her in the direction of music management. When she signed on to be the bands manager three years ago, she lacked a lot of experience. But she made up for it with enthusiasm and a desire to learn. Roberts works a part-time job and focuses the majority of her time booking seven local bands. The process starts with determining each bands market, fol- lowed by sending out e-mails and calling venue owners and managers to book shows. The Venue Promoter Mike Tiffany, Salina senior, says he views music as more than just a passion; its a job. Tiffany has been in charge of booking and promotions for The Bottle- neck, 737 New Hampshire St., for the past two years. He works four to five nights a week at the club, roughly 30 to 40 hours a week, in addition to being a full-time stu- dent. During an average work day, Tiffany responds to 50 to 60 e-mails from tour managers, bands and band personnel. He also advances shows, which entails talk- ing to booked bands and determining concert-specific details, such as what to charge at the door and the bands sound requirements. He then pays each band at the end of the night. Tiffany also coordi- nates promotion for shows, which includes working with graphic designers to design flyers and other promotional materials and assembling a street team to post flyers throughout town. In many ways, this sort of work suits Tiffany well. Describing himself as a music enthusiast and someone who had always been in bands, Tiffany wanted to get involved with the music industry. He put in two years of taking tickets, checking IDs and handing out wristbands at The Bottleneck before he was pro- moted. Now in his fourth year at The Bot- tleneck, Tiffany says he wants to pursue music management. I cant seem to find anything that could suit me better, he says. The Street Team coordinator Last year, Dave Barrett, Carbondale, Ill., junior, handed out 10,000 flyers for the Wakarusa Music Festival at the Bonnaroo Music Festival in Manchester, Tenn. This year, Barrett is again on the front lines of promotion for the Wakarusa Music Festival. In high school, Barrett pro- moted bands like the North Mississippi All-Stars, Umphreys McGee and Moon- shine Still by posting flyers around town and handing out handbills after concerts. He now leads a street team of music fans devoted to spreading the word about Wakarusa. In addition to making sure this festival is adequately promoted through his own efforts and those of his assembly of street teamers, Barrett is responsible for the content on the message board at www.wakarusa.com, and he is trying to implement a nationwide model of com- munication so Wakarusa promoters can keep in touch and network with each other, regardless of distance. While Bar- rett says he doesnt want to disclose whether or not he is paid, he works any- where from one to four hours a day and can take days off when he wants. Barrett says anyone can promote a festival. Its a gradual process, he says. Just offer to help and you get more and more involved. The Publicist While theres certainly more than one way to break into the business side of the music industry, hard work and dedication are two qualities that distinguish those who make it from those who dont. Ever Kipp, senior publicist with Big Hassle Management, a music management, publicity and licensing firm based out of New York City, says that working in the music industry is filled with glamour but is a hard industry to work in. It often requires hard work with little to no pay in the beginning. After graduating from col- lege, Kipp moved to New York City and interned with a small music publicity firm called Girlie Action. He says he worked for free in his first year in music manage- ment. After proving his dedication and desire to work in the industry, Oasis Pro- ductions, another small music publicity firm based out of New York, hired Kipp. He was promoted within Oasis to handle tour logistics for a handful of indie rock bands. In 1999, Kipp came to Big Hassle where he worked his way up from publicist to sen- ior publicist and worked directly with top national musicians, such as Robert Ran- dolph & The Family Band and Toots and the Maytals. Kipp now manages national musicians such as Mofro, The Capitol Years and Aqueduct. After climbing the corporate ladder for the past 10 years, Kipp says the value of hard work in this industry cannot be overstated. Do a couple of internships, he says. Just prove yourself and your capabili- ties. Show them you kick ass. cbrown@kansan.com By Chris Brown, Jayplay writer Imwith the band Photo by Kit Leffler Having a good ear for music management Senior Mike Tiffany works the door at the Bottleneck during the Wednesday, Feb. 23 Supernaut's show. Tiffany is active in and supports Lawrence's local music scene. Take Fish House Punch Location: 821 Iowa St. If you are looking for a diverse crowd, Moon Bar is the place to be. Attracting people from all different walks of life, Moon Bar offers a variety of activities and live music to keep you entertained for the night. The Moon Bar has four pool tables, a dartboard, touch screens and a dance floor. Private Karaoke rooms are unique to Moon Bar. The rooms, which feature state-of-the-art equipment, couches and a big screen TV, give you and your friends the sen- sation of a private party. The only difference is that a waitress delivers your drinks, so you dont have to designate a nightly beer bitch. Moon Bar is one of the few bars in Lawrence that has sake bombs. Instead of waiting in line for 30 minutes at McDonalds or Taco Bell after you leave the bar, just order a bowl of hot broth and noodles. It only takes five minutes and you can choose from spicy, chicken, beef or pork flavors. They sound and taste a lot like Ramen Noodles, but when you are that been drinking all night kind of hun- gry, anything tastes good. Dress Code: none Maximum Occupancy: 193 Ashley Michaels Bar stat-card Moon Bar At some point in col- lege, youve no doubt been at a party where people served jungle juice, trash can punch or a sugary- sweet, sublimely strong punch by some other name. While the idea of creating a large batch of drinks for your guests may seem like a good idea at the time, the concoction usually turns out to be overdone and somewhat juve- nile. Fish Bowl Punch, however, isnt your regular alcoholic punch. This drink has an impressive background. George Washington supposedly imbibed this drink on many occasions. Serve this to your friends and impress them with your knowledge of its high- class connections. But like most punches, its intense, so make sure you keep the portions under control. Fish Bowl Punch was created in 1732 at the Schuylkill Fishing Club in Phila- delphia. It was traditionally served during cold weather to remind the fish- ing club members of warmer months. The club held regular meetings, which always began with members drinking this punch. After having this drink, George Washington apparently was too intoxicated to complete his daily journal entries. Follow the lead of the fishing club and prepare this drink for a couple of your drinking buddies. 36 oz. (or 1 liter bottle) dark rum 24 oz. frozen, thawed lemonade 225 oz. (or 750 milliliter bottle) cognac 4 oz. peach brandy 3/4 pound sugar 40 oz. water Stir sugar into lemon juice and water until sugar dissolves. An hour before serving, add alcohol and ice and refrig- erate. Make sure ice stays cold and doesnt dilute the punch. Source: www.hotwired.com Mandy Hendrix Interview: Cocktail of the week If youve ever stayed up late watching the Cartoon Network on Sunday nights, youve heard mc chris. And if youre one of the countless fans of the cult classic Adult Swim cartoons, then youve probably got a shrine to him in your closet. The Libertyville, Ill. rap- per started out as the voice of Hesh the angry robot on Sealab 2021 and has since moved on to become the voice of MC Pee Pants on Aqua Teen Hunger Force. This Tuesday hell be slinging rhymes at the Bottleneck as he passes through Lawrence on his nationwide-tour. Jayplaywriter Robert Perkins caught up with him between shows to talk about touring, Adult Swim and Star Wars. Why did you decide to go on tour? And hows the tour going so far? I decided to tour last summer in San Diego at Comicon, when I was on an Adult Swim panel there. I rapped a little and this huge room of people went crazy. And I thought to myself, I want to do that again as soon as possible, maybe even do a whole show. I quit my job and came up to New York to record some new stuff, but it quickly became obvious that it was time to tour and not record. As for how its going, my manager says he can book me every day til Christmas. Weve done about 11 or 12 shows so far and have sold out every one of them. The show still has some kinks, but thats to be expected with just one month of rehearsal. The fans have been awesome and meeting them has kicked everything in my life up a notch. Why did you decide to do a show in Lawrence? Sometimes its a fan bugging a venue, sometimes its a venue run by fans, some- times its just my booking agent looking to fill in empty spaces on our tour sched- ule. I plan to go everywhere. Lawrence is just one of the many places where mc fans are hiding out. What can we expect from your show on Tuesday? Vomiting. Fetts Vette has become an underground classic, especially among us Star Wars nerds. Which is your favorite Star Wars movie, and why? Well, ROTJ [Return of the Jedi], just because its the one I saw in the theaters or remember seeing. The opening at Jabbas was very old school and is probably the closest Lucas ever came to capturing the vibe of the old serials he was trying to imitate (Indy flicks excluded). Who do you consider to be your main musical influences? Reggie and Full Effect, The Roots, Talib Kawli, Cibbo Matto. Not all of them are necessarily my favorite bands, but just the way they approach music is what I look at. How did you get in with the whole Adult Swim crew? I got discovered in a bar in Manhattan. I sound weird, and I guess they dug it. What drew you to Aqua Teen Hunger Force from Sealab 2021? I just wanted to try something new. I really wanted to be a member of the Wil- liams Street Family. I wanted to see how networks and programming blocks worked not just individual toons. Youve said before that youd like to do your own cartoon at some point. What sort of show do you have in mind? Not telling. But Ive got it all planned out. And what else do you have planned for the future? Id like to get married and have a family, but thats way off. Id like to be on a Harold Team at the UCB Theater in New York. Id like to make a huge kick-ass album that was half comedy skits, half rap. Id like to get a nice car, buy my brother a house. I want to make the mc cartoon. I want to write and direct my own tour DVD, my own music videos, my own films. Besides that I plan on seeing Revenge of the Sith a few thousand gazillion times. Robert Perkins mc chris Photo courtesy of www.nndb.com C o u r t e o u s y
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w w w . h o t w i r e d . c o m When Stephanie Filardos friends saw the announcement in our Valentines issue that she was giving away her engage- ment ring, they were shocked that she wasnt selling it. The Owensville, Mo. jun- ior says she wouldnt have wanted to buy anything with the money from the ring. After her fianc broke off the engage- ment, she decided to give the seven-dia- mond white gold ring, which she esti- mates is worth $2,500, to a deserving couple. She had 20 couples respond to the announcement and she chose Lars Larson, Atchison senior, and his girl- friend, Christy Rachow, Phillipsburg jun- ior. Filardo says she chose the couple because although they plan to marry sometime next year, theyre realistic about not rushing into it, which Filardo says may have been the problem in her former relationship. She was also moved by the way hes planning to propose. Sorry, we cant share that Christy does- nt know yet. Larson says the couple met at a party in April 2003 and started dating five months later. It seems like yesterday that we met and now that Christy is in my life, every- thing seems like it is going a million miles an hour, Larson wrote in his letter to Filardo. Filardo says she didnt realize the effect her giveaway would have. At the end of one letter, the writer said he was glad he had the opportunity to write out how much he appreciated his girlfriend. I think Valentines Day is a cop out to show appreciation for one day out of the year, Filardo says. Even for people who didnt submit, it was a chance to get you thinking about why youre with someone and tell them. you are an only child, you can probably remember a time in your life when tormenting your sibling was fun. Laura Koster,Great Bend sophomore, remembers being the baby of the family until her little brother came along. She recalls one Christmas after all the presents were opened, a big box sat empty in the living room. I told my brother we were going to put him in the box and ship him to Africa, and he started crying, Koster says. She says she was just trying to scare him and that she feels bad about it now, but the hair pulling, tattling and sabotage of childhood doesnt always stop when we grow up. Unreconciled relationships among sib- lings can lead to more violent acts and even estrangement in adulthood. While most siblings mature over time and learn how to communicate better to resolve their problems, there are always a few that just cannot get along. In childhood, siblings rival for parents attention and getting their emotional needs met. Siblings may feel that parents give more attention to the other sibling. While this is still an issue for adults in some cases, jealousy arises for different reasons later in life. Whether its who went to the better college, who is better at what they do, who got married first or who has the better job, as adults, we still deal with issues of envy between those closest to us. Rosemary Tuggle, director of Clinical Programs for the Family Service and Guid- ance Center in Topeka, says that rivaling siblings behave more passive aggres- sively as adults, which looks like tattling or backstabbing. These behaviors dont appear suddenly in adulthood. They are rooted in years of misunderstandings, judgments, jealousy and assumptions about other people. A continuation of this attitude and unre- solved conflicts can carry over into close relationships later in life. It can impact romantic and work relationships, as well as contribute to health issues in the long run. Overall ongoing anger and resentment can limit the support and richness that can be found in family life, Tuggle says. Forgiveness may be difficult in some sit- uations, but it is one of the most powerful tools we possess. Sometimes it takes a mediator with a goal of finding common ground to start with a clean slate and move on. Tuggle says that each individual may need to forgive themselves for past deeds as well as forgiving each other. This process could involve the whole family confronting and helping the fighting sib- lings to work together. Tuggle suggests regularly talking to your sibling about their emotions. Trust is also a big part of any relationship, and clear and open communication facilitates a trusting relationship. For Koster, hair-pulling is a thing of the past. She says her relationship with her brother is good now. Theyre in different stages of life with different things going on. But every once in a while though, she teases that she should have been the baby. eshipps@kansan.com 14Jayplay 03.03.05 A battle of wills Sibling rivalry not just for kids By Erin Shipps, Jayplay writer Illustration by Austin Gilmore Unless The sentimental stuff: part two Photo contributed by Lars Larson Lauren Siemens and Kyle Spencer were best friends in mid- dle school. They hung out nearly every day. Right before high school, the Augusta freshmen started drifting apart. It wasnt until a senior campout three years later that they started talking to one another again. They talked all night and realized how much they missed being friends. About a month after that they decided to take it to the next level. They are now closer than ever. Ashley Doyle Lauren Siemens & Kyle Spencer How met we Photo contributed by Lauren Siemens Investigating the ex-files I never thought Id take love advice from Brittany Murphy, but her per- formance in Little Black Bookmade me think. Maybe its not such a bad idea to EX-trapolate information about your boyfriends or girlfriends past rela- tionships. Understanding why past relationships didnt work can tell you a lot about your sweetheart. As Mur- phys characters friend said in the movie, if youre not learning from his or her history, youre repeating it. Im not suggesting delving into unnecessary corners of your partners life because that will only lead to ruin- ing the happiness that you have. Often times your significant other will brief you on their ex-files. But be wary if he or she hides it because, as Murphys wise friend advised, omissions are betrayals. For all of you amateur PIs out there, snooping through your partners things can be a really bad idea. How- ever, if you happen upon something that doesnt register true, open com- munication is always the best option. If you dont trust your partners explana- tion, reasses why you are still in the relationship . Samara Nazir Love Little Black Book source Courtesy of www.amazon.com 623 Vermont Sat: Tues: Thurs: Sun: Fri: Wed: Mon: *UHDW 6SHFLDOV -$2.50 Import Bottles\$2 Captains $2.50 Shots of Petrone and Cabo Wabo Tequila- 1/2 Price Appetizers $2 23oz Domestic Draws $4 Reubens $3 Crown Royal Drinks All Pitchers $5 $.25 Wings $1 Domestic Draws $5 Red, White, & Bleu burgers $1.50 Wells $2 Domestic Bottles $6 Philly cheeseseaks $3 Jager Bombs $4 Domestic Pitchers $6 Import Pitchers $3 Double Bacardis 2 for 1 burgers $2 Goldschlager Shots Buy 1 Get 1 Free Burgers with this coupon exp. 3/18 2 for 1 Wells $50 Domestic Draws DJ NicK Redell $4 Chicken Strip Baskets Cursed () PG-13, 86 minutes, South- winds 12 Director Wes Craven and writer Kevin Williamson re-team for a horror film that uses all the rules laid out in their Screamseries. Their new flick,Cursed, begins with a brother and sister inflicted with the curse of the werewolf. The siblings must search out the cause of their infliction, all the while dealing with effects of the curse. People seem to take Wes Craven too seriously since the success of his recent films he never made thought provoking horrors in the vein of The Sixth Sense or The Others, and in fact has gotten less serious as his career has progressed. This film proves that. There are a number of cheesy moments, including some bad special effects, a flimsy plot and unmem- orable performances, although Christina Ricci does a good job. There are, however, lots of jumps and tense moments, despite the lack of the usual Craven gore element, pres- ent in his past films obviously an effect of the Hollywood sys- tem he was never a big part of until now. To my knowledge, he has never made a PG-13 horror film before. Williamsons writing is typical of his style, part Scream, part Dawsons Creek, but in Cravens hands doesnt take itself so seriously. There are as many laughs as screams. There are also plenty of nods to past horror films throughout the picture, especially in a particular themed club (where Cravens Freddy Krueger is displayed), and Ricci herself looks strikingly like Morticia Addams (her mother when she played Wednesday Addams in the Addams Family films). I wouldnt call this a good movie, but a lot of fun in an older style of horror film. This is the film that the characters in the Screamseries would have loved. Michael Boyd Cube Zero (1/2) R, 97 minutes, DVD Rental The third installment of the Canadian cult films set around the unwilling participants of an experiment inside a giant cube where each room either leads them toward escape or certain death by various gory means. The first two films were similar in con- tent and style people wake up in the cube, move from room to room, gradually dying off, while dealing with conflicting personalities within the group. The claus- trophobic atmosphere, paranoia and fights between the characters kept things interesting, but also became old by the end of Cube 2: Hypercube. This film takes a fresh approach, by pulling the audience outside the cube for the first time, and concentrating on the controllers who look upon the unfortunate guinea pigs. Inter- esting issues arise about authority, power and even a touch of religion, and while dramatic and frightening, is also humorous at points. For the first time, the gory deaths are not the centerpiece, and admirably the movie doesnt overuse computer special effects. Instead it relies on tradi- tional methods. The filmmaking is well thought out, and the set designs return to the rustic, simple look of the first film, making this a worthy addition to the series. The DVD has some surprisingly good extras if you are interested in set design and processes put into the making of a film such as this, with storyboard-to-film comparisons, pre-production set designs and a making-of featurette. You can also re-watch the film with the directors com- mentary. This is a nice little DVD that should delight fans of the two prequels. Michael Boyd Film Face-Off Two reviewers throwing stars Film Face-Off Two reviewers throwing Movies Excellent: National Lampoons Animal House Good: Old School Okay: Revenge of the Nerds Bad: PCU No stars: National Lampoons Dorm Daze All images courteous of www.movies.yahoo.com e v e r y
d a y . Bright Eyes, Digital Ash in a Digital Urn The second act in Bright Eyes recent dual album launch, the excellently titled Digital Ash in a Digital Urn, is a departure from the acoustic mini-ballads of front man Conor Obersts previous releases. Folk gui- tars thrown overboard, Digital Ash is anchored instead by looped beats, layers of lush, fluorescent keyboards and a technique known only as program- ming, courtesy of pro- ducer Mike Mogis alter ego, the Digital Audio Engine. And like Im Wide Awake its Morning, Digital Ashs countrified twin, there is no short- age of notable guests. Enigmatic art-rock weirdo Nick Zinner of the Yeah Yeah Yeahs appears on a half-dozen tracks, and beatsmith Jimmy Tamborello of Dntel and Postal Service lends his digital wisdom to the albums first single, Take it Easy (Love Nothing.) But even as the album explores its dig- itally encrypted self, vintage Bright Eyes remains at its core. Oberst is still a drunken romantic, cursing the govern- ment, perennially stuck physically, mentally and emotionally somewhere between Omaha and New York. Leaving the sorrowful Midwest for NYC on Gold Mine Gutted, he returns a few tracks later claiming, I need a break from the city again. I think Ill ship myself back west. Obersts inability to commit geo- graphically mirrors his inability to com- mit romantically: On Take it Easy, he sings, It isnt so hard to get close to me. Therell be no arguments, we will always agree. And Ill try and be kind when I ask you to leave; well both take it easy. As it stands now, the electronic pop of Digital Ash seems to be Bright Eyes best shot at leap- ing from indie saint- hood to the main- stream. Oberst has been putting out acoustic Bright Eyes records for years with relatively lit- tle mainstream notice, but the recent success of the Postal Service shows there may be a niche market for emotional digital pop albums. Though Im Wide Awake is the better of the two recent Bright Eyes releases Oberst has been perfecting that sound for years Digital Ash is more exciting. If its a preview of future releases, Digital Ash will mark the point of departure. If its merely a one-time experiment, it will become a Bright Eyes anomaly. Right now however, it stands as one of the young 2005s best records. Try if you like: The Postal Service and Give it Up Grade: B+ Dave Ruigh M.I.A. Arular In 1983, civil war broke out in Sri Lanka. Maya Arulpragasam, or M.I.A, was 7 years old at the time and was a part of the Tamil minority that was fighting against the ruling Sinhala. Her father fought with the Tamil Tiger mili- tants, eventually disappear- ing amidst the chaos. Maya and her remaining family were eventually forced to seek asylum in the United Kingdom. Maya now lives in London, where she has been making some major noise with her unique guerrilla-style hip- hop, telling her story of surviving as a ref- ugee. Arular takes a multitude of influences that draw from Jamaican dancehall to American hip-hop, and centers them on the melody of consistent and minimalist beats that put this album above and beyond anything else thats out there. For a woman who has seen so much hard- ship, shes made one hell of an optimistic debut album, using her experience with a war that has killed more than 50,000 peo- ple to create a more peaceful outcome. Her first single, Galang, is a dance club track that bumps so hard youll be begging the DJ to hit repeat. M.I.A has an agenda that reaches deeper than mak- ing asses shake (though Arular certainly does the trick). She has an unavoid- able amount of political baggage that comes through in her exotic sound and subtle lyrics. Mayas voice has a confident swagger and natu- ral spice thats so irresistible its easy to see why she is quickly becoming an inter- national force who may take over com- pletely. Start stretching now. This thing is going to make the whole world want to bust a move. Grade: A Ryan McBee Motley Cre Red, White & Crue Most of us, myself included, are too young to remember Tommy Lee for anything other than his infamous home video opposite Pamela Ander- son. The same holds true for Vince Neil and his stint on The Surreal Life. Now Lee and Neil are back along with Nikki Sixx and Mick Mars to show the world once again what made them famous in the first place, Mot- ley Cre. It has been more than six years since Motley Cre was last together, but they have recently reunited to release Red, White & Crue a two-disc greatest hits CD that features three new tracks in addition to their other hits. The three new songs released are If I Die Tomorrow, Sick Love Song and a cover of The Rolling Stones song Street Fighting Man. Unfortunately the song, If I Die Tomorrow was written with the help of Simple Plan so its sound and lyrics are very, well, you can imagine. The other two songs, although not written with the help of Simple Plan, still dont reflect the sound that the band is known for. Red, White & Crue is a greatest hits CD of one of the last great rock bands so obviously it is going to be good. You have to admire them for trying to continue their success, but at the same time you wonder how difficult it wouldve been for them to write three new songs reflective of their old style. Instead the listener is stuck with a Simple Plan song, a Rolling Stones song and one mediocre Motley Cre song. At least it isnt an entirely new CD. Grade:A for old; C for new Jonathan Millstein LISTEN I m a g e s
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L o v e Ga r d e n So u n d s Used & New CDs, LPs and posters CA$H for CDs 936 1/ 2 Ma s s ( Up s t a i r s ) 843/ 1551 Looking for money? Star Fox Assault Gamecube Fox McCloud and his team return once again to save the galaxy from evil. This is yet another title where Fox can leave the comfort of his Arwing and hit the surface. Star Fox Assault is another good title in the Star Fox Family. The game combines great graphics, good gameplay and the old-school feeling. The game starts with Fox being called out to finish off the last of Andross army, now lead by Andrew Oinkinny, Andross nephew, and an old member of Star Wolf. After you defeat him, you discover the coming of a new enemy called Aparoids. Now the Star Fox team has been called in for the mission of saving everything in existence from this alien menace. This game is a step up from the previ- ous Star Fox Adventure. This game goes back to its original roots and most of the gameplay is in the cockpit of the Arwing. However, now there are levels that require Fox to go on foot with his blaster in hand and blast the Aparoids like a lone soldier from Starship Troopers. While on land, he still has the option of getting in the Landmaster tank and crushing the enemies beneath its treads. These options gives the game a more fun feel, allowing for players to create different strategies to complete missions. The game still has your wingmen around to help you out and lend colorful commentary to missions. And yes, they still ask for help when they have enemies on their tail. However, now when you help them out they will be more grateful and will give you items to help you along in the mission, such as extra health, or extra supplies. The only real problem I had with this game was that this game ended too quickly for me. When things started to get real good, the game ended with some questions left unanswered. Also, the multiplayer function is back where up to four people can engage in dogfights. They still incorporate the option of switching vehicles in certain stages. Star Fox Assault is a good title. It deserves a rental at least, but if you want to unlock everything and get all the medals in the game, you may have to buy it. Grade: B Chris Moore Constantine PS2, Xbox, PC Movie companies nowadays seem to be compelled to release games based on their movie property. This would be all well and good if their purpose was to pres- ent gamers with a unique experience and not just trying to cash in on their movie rights. Constantine is much like an alien probe: unnecessary and generally unpleasant. The story driving this game is basically a skewed version of what happens in the movie; omitting characters and changing events. Some parts are taken directly from the movie, however, and they seem to work the best, especially the opening exorcism scene. Aside from the story, most of the things seen in the movie make an appearance in the game. Keanu Reeves becomes equipped with his gold knuckles, holy shotgun, and the ability to go to hell. The game has additional weapons such as The Crucifier, a rapid firing nail gun. A spell system has been added as well, granting players the power to smite foes with holy lightning and to turn enemies to stone. There just isnt really enough here to keep someone entertained, unless of course that person is a huge fan of the movie. Nothing besides the story is new here, and that alone cant make up for the rest of the game. Constantine goes the way of most movie spin-offs and does a rather poor job of capturing the essence of the movie, which in this case wasnt incredibly great itself. Grade: D+ Nick Finnegan Champions: Return to Arms PS2 Before reviewing Champions, I had never played any other Norath games, but I was never lost in the story. Actually, I feel the complete lack of story may have been a strong point. For some, this game will be a testos- terone-fueled trip of continuous hacking and slashing. Those gamers, myself included, will be perfectly happy being a barbarian. For those who want to cast spells and use that silly mana stuff, this game will be about customizing a charac- ters moves and armor until your fighting style is in sync. Champions allows you to play with up to four people. This way, as a barbarian, you can team up with your mana-hugging buddies, the wizards, and use some strat- egy. This is hours of fun, but it needs some work. Only two players can have their equipment screens visible at one time. Not one of the 14 buttons on the controller allows you to hand an item to another player. This means that for every hour you spend killing, you spend 10 minutes drop- ping items on the ground for someone else to pick up and equip. This created a serious lull in my continuous barbarian- killing-monsters-with-sword/ax time. Although I never had enough time to play the game both as a good and bad guy, Im aware of the choices you get to make that affect which levels you play. I also never experienced online play. But according to Electronic Gaming Monthly, you benefit by playing the online mode after you have beaten the game offline. All flaws aside, this game is worth your time if youre a fan of hack and slashes or Diablo-esque games. Grade: B+ Dan Hoyt Video games Photos courtesy of www.IGN.com 18 Jayplay 03.03.05 I spent my honeymoon in Branson, Mo. I could say dont knock it til youve tried it, but I feel a bit dejected because two of my best friends went to Jamaica and the Bahamas for their honeymoons. It was a nice trip, but sitting through the Dixie Stampede just cant stand up to lounging in a hammock overlooking the crystal- clear, blue waters of the Caribbean. I guess Ill chalk it up with the rest of the ideas I had about marriage that, in the past two years, simply didnt play out as I expected. Many girls spend their childhoods dreaming about being married. They dream of the tall, dark and handsome prince who will sweep them off their feet and carry them into a life of perfection. My own dreams of marriage grandeur included candle-lit dinners, romantic vacations and, of course, a sex life to be envied by all. Here are the harsh realities: Grub time Dinner is hardly candle-lit and rarely at the dinner table. Our 1950s dinner table, courtesy of my great grandmother, sits folded in half in our dining/living/office space. It is a magnet for transient papers, homework and usually chocolate. I think weve cleared it off maybe 10 times in two years. No, we usually eat dinner on the floor in front of the television. Although we have TV trays, were just too lazy to use them. Being the amazing chef that I am, our dinner normally consists of ham- burger helper, macaroni and cheese or if were lucky spaghetti. Im trying to broaden my horizons as the budding cui- sine-goddess woman of the household that I should be, but who has the time? In a world of fast-food ecstasy we often find ourselves trying to justify a trip to El Mez- cal or Subway after destroy- ing our apartment looking for money. Who needs to pay bills? Imaginary vacations As for romantic vacations, we spent a weekend at a bed and breakfast that nearly broke us. One night in a renovated barn in the country with a pond, an indoor swim- ming pool, a hot tub and a retreat of 50 middle-aged women. Aside from the cack- ling, noisy women dancing above our room, it was romantic. Because the women were attending conferences and spent most of their time together, the heated pool and hot tub were all ours. Win- dows looking out across the moonlit countryside were all around us, and we were in heaven. As bills stack up every month, though, Ive learned not to expect vacations very often. We cant afford a road trip, let alone a cruise. And forget about airplane tickets. Sex My husband and I chose not to have sex before we were married. We had huge expectations and no experience, but con- trary to what movies and television tell you, its not so easy the first time. At least it wasnt for us. Forget wedding night bliss. We were so tired from the whole day that we could barely move. Yes, the moment we had waited four years for, the absolute pinnacle of our wedding day, the cata- clysmic, life-changing event ended with both of us exhausted and asleep in each others arms. It was wonderful to be together, however. It was our first time sleeping in a bed together, our first time waking up together and our first road trip together. Its been challeng- ing, however. It has taken these last two years to semi-master the art of sex, but then its only when we make the time. Balancing act Finding stability is one of the hardest aspects of marriage. Simply put, men need sex and women need emotional closeness. Thats not to say that these needs are exclusive to either gender, but the two go hand in hand. Finding time for sex before youre married might be easier. I wouldnt know. But when those vows are over and its a free romp for the rest of your lives, it kind of takes a spot on the back burner. When work, school, homework and hobbies get in the way of your rela- tionship, neither partner is being fulfilled. But heres the amazing part Ive learned: As women, the more focused we are on fulfilling the sexual needs of our hus- bands, the closer he feels to us and the more emotional fulfillment well see. Con- sequently, the more well enjoy and want to have sex. Its circular. Aside from balancing sex with every- thing else, finding time to be together also can be difficult. My husbands dreams of knocking off The Edge, befriending Bono and becoming the next rock god means he spends a ton of time playing the guitar. I, on the other hand, have become painfully obsessed with reality TV, which leaves me mesmerized for hours at a time. I dont want to sit and watch him play guitar, and his ability to stare at the TV compares little t o mi ne. So how do we reconcile and find quality time? It takes prioritizing. Of course we are the most important people in each others lives, but we might take that for granted sometimes. Going from the single life, where you do whatever you want, to constantly considering another person in your decisions takes a lot of adjustment and sacrifice. Then and Now Instead of splitting rent and bills with three other people, its just the two of us trying to eke our way through on one salary. Doing the household chores now means cleaning up after two people instead of one, which might be my least favorite part of marriage. Instead of hang- ing out with many different people, its usually just us. We used to think wed die before we saw each other again. Now, when we are together, were probably thinking about something else. Fighting used to be escapable by going home. Now that we share a home, we spend many late nights working out our differences so we dont go to bed angry. But I still love wak- ing up with my husband. I have someone who shares my hopes and dreams. Some- one who would stop the world to make me feel better when I am sad. Someone who never gets tired of holding my hand and tells me Im beautiful every day. Someone I know I can count on, no matter what. Yes, marriage is a lot of work, but I wouldnt trade it for anything in the world. eshipps@kansan.com By Erin Shipps, Jayplay writer 03.03.05 Jayplay 19 Marriage and the evil truths I wish I would have known Married Young Illustration by Scott Drummond 10% off Waxing and Massage when you mention Jayplay ad $1 Shots $2.25 Bottle Special $1.75 Wells $2.25 Bottle Special $1 Shots $2.25 Bottle Special $1 Shots $2.25 Bottle Special $1 Shots $1 off All Imports $2.25 Bottle Special $1 Shots $1.50 Boulevard Wheat and Pale Ale Pints $2.00 Bacardi $2.00 any bottle $5.oo Grilled Chicken Sanwiches $2.oo Pounders $2.00 Captains $5.00 Philly's $2.50 32oz. Big Beers $3.00 Vodka and energy drinks $5.00 Chicken Strips $5.00 Pitchers $2.50 Bloody Marys $5.00 Burgers $2.00 Domestic Bottles $2.00 Bottles $0.25 cent Wings $2.00 U.V. 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