US ARMY COMMAND AND GENERAL STAFF COLLEGE International Military Student Preparatory Course Lesson Plan for Lesson

P910 English Writing Course Author: Mr. Mike Brettmann Lesson Author: Mr. Le Denniston Date prepared: 31 Mar 2005 1. SCOPE This lesson is to help students understand how to write an effective English essay. It supports the numerous writing requirements they will encounter in CGSC. Since many students are non-English speakers in their native languages, this lesson provides a foundation level of knowledge to aid them in successfully dealing with those requirements. This lesson emphasizes one field grade leader competency map (FGLM) skill by challenging students to improve their ability to communicate clearly (5.1). During the essay writing phase of this lesson, they will be challenged to demonstrate a specific leader behavior that is indicative of exemplary field grade officer skill. The behavior is: Assesses environment (people, events, and systems) then tailors message to convince others to follow ideas and make a commitment (5.1.1).The behaviors identified in the FGLM provide a common language and assist in the assessment of overall student performance by providing performance indicators to differentiate between successful and exemplary performance. 2. LEARNING OBJECTIVES TLO C. Action: Apply CGSOC skills. Condition: Individually or within a group; as an officer working on preparation of country and government briefings; given concrete experiences, class discussions; reading assignments; timed requirements, and references; and computer assisted instruction and research. Standard: Application includes 1. Applying briefing techniques, IAW ST 22-2. 2. Individual/group research techniques. 3. Recording events, IAW ST 22-2. 4. Participating in class IAW staff group and lesson requirements. 5. Group development. 6. Applying Microsoft Office and CGSOC related internet computer skills. 7. Effective written communication. 8. Complying with laws/rules/regulations to include use of government assets. 9. Honorable representation of home country. Learning Level: Cognitive: Application ELO C.07 Action: Write an effective essay. Condition: As a CGSOC International Military Student and member of a staff group; given concrete experiences, ST22-2; Writing Guides; and approved topic, and class discussion. Standard: The Essay must include: 1.A clearly stated thesis. P910-EW-LP1

2.Clearly stated support and analysis. 3.Organization suitable for the topic. 4.Proper documentation of research. 5.Correct use of passive voice. Learning Level: Cognitive: Application JPME I Learning Areas Supported: None. 3. LEADER BEHAVIORS 5.1.1 Assesses environment (people, events, and systems) then tailors message to convince others to follow ideas and make a commitment 4. ASSIGNED STUDENT READINGS Advance Sheet

Scan: Chapter 2, ST 22-2; Appendix A, ST 22-2 (34 pages)

5. INSTRUCTOR ADDITIONAL READING(S)/MATERIAL: None. 6. TRAINING AIDS Appendix A: Assessment Plan Appendix B: Slides Appendix C: Example Thesis Statement Handout Appendix D: Example Citations Handout Appendix E: Essay Writing Handout Whiteboard Screen and PC for PowerPoint presentation Student laptops Three butcher board easels per staff group Markers for use with the butcher boards 7. CONDUCT OF LESSON a. Introduction: (5 minutes). (1) Slide 1, Lesson Objective. The instructor tells students that the combined lesson will extend over two days, and will include an initial portion on how to write an English essay, followed by some group practice, and an essay writing assignment on the second day. Make sure they understand that the essay is graded on a pass-fail basis. Emphasize the importance of good writing to success in CGSC. Refer the students back to their advance sheets for the standards that will be applied to their writing. Make sure the students understand they must have their notebook computers in class for the second day. Instructor Note: The class goals are to review basic academic writing procedures, and have students demonstrate their writing ability for diagnostic purposes. Day one will be devoted to discussing how to write an essay, and a group practice period during which students will go through some of the steps in actual writing. Students should NOT be told what topic they will be writing about on day two so that they do not compose their essay at home overnight. The primary goal is good organization and clear communication mechanics matter only when they interfere with communications. Because of time P910-EW-LP-2

limitations, students whose essays are below standard will be given more help later rather than during IMSPC. b. Lesson Timeline: Day One 5 minutes 15 minutes 10 minutes 50 minutes 10 minutes 20 minutes 120 minutes 10 minutes Day Two 240 minutes Introduction: Attention and Motivation. Concrete Experience: Quick writing assignment. Publish and Process: Discussion of quick writing. Generalize New Information: Essay Writing. Break. Develop: Discussion on writing Apply: Group Practice (Allow breaks as necessary). Conclusion and assignment of homework Apply: Write an essay.

(2) Slide 2, Job One. c. Concrete Experience: (15 minutes). The instructor assigns the students the task of writing, in English, a short description of how they felt about what they did in class yesterday. Tell them to work individually, by hand on paper or using their laptops and be as clear as they can in describing their activities in class on the previous day. Tell them not to be too worried about grammar and spelling, but to think more about organizing their writing. d. Publish and Process: (10 minutes). Discuss with the students how they went about meeting the quick writing assignment. Dont focus on what the students actually wrote, but the process of writing as they experienced it. Some suggested process questions are: How hard was this for you? What made the exercise difficult/easy? How did you go about organizing to write? What was the process you went through in writing this assignment? How do you feel about having to write in English? Do you think you can learn how to write, or is it just something some people know how to do? e. Generalize New Information: (50 minutes). (6) Slide 3, Why this process? CGSOC students will face a lot of writing assignments during the course. This process will help them to learn to express themselves clearly in writing, and to deal with CGSOC writing requirements. The process is intended to be recursive, meaning that a writer can return to any part of the process at any time if he needs to. Each writer will need to personalize the process for their own use and to deal with different types of writing requirements. Students will have to prepare book reports, longer subject papers, quick article summaries and

P910-EW-LP-3

other compositions throughout their time at Ft. Leavenworth. Instructor Note: Regarding plagiarism--the student needs to grasp with every assignment when he or she must give his/her own view or summarize, paraphrase, or quote an authors view or a sources information. The student must know how to clearly distinguish whose ideas he or she is presenting. This is a critical point. The students have read a sample essay that includes citationsyou could point out the way that student writer used published sources. Students must understand that plagiarism is taken seriously and is considered a major academic offense. If they have any questions about how to use materials from their research in a paper they should ask an instructor before turning the paper in. Afterwards is too late. (4) Slide 4, Class Time. Go over the two class days for this lesson, making sure the students understand that on day one they will be learning a process and doing some practice, they will have a small homework assignment overnight, and they will have an in-class writing assignment on day two. They wont be given the exact subject they will write on until tomorrow, so there is no point in trying to work on their essay tonight. Today Learn the process Small group practice Short homework assignment Tomorrow Composition during class

(5) Slide 5, What You Will Learn. Discuss the fact that writing is a process, and that if students have a good process in mind when they write it makes writing easier and clearer. There is an example format for essays that we will be going over later in class. It is a good basic pattern to follow and should help not only in writing student essays tomorrow, but later in CGSOC as well. There are some basic errors in writing structure that students should learn to avoid because they get in the way of understanding. Tell them not to be so worried about them that they lose focus on their ideas, but keep them basically in mind. We will discuss them in more detail later. Use a process for composing Follow a format for essays Avoid certain structure errors (6) Slide 6, What is the Writing Process? Briefly go over each of the steps of the process, letting students know each one will be covered in more detail later in the class. Emphasize that at any point in the process a writer can go back one or more steps if they need to in order to make their writing better and clearer. The best writers write, rewrite, rewrite and rewrite some more. The first time through is always rough and needs revision. Understand the assignment Gather information Generate ideas Establish a purpose Compose a thesis statement Make a plan Draft the composition P910-EW-LP-4

 Check and revise the composition (7) Slide 7, What is My Assignment? This is the equivalent of clarifying a military mission statement you have to understand clearly what you are to do before you can start to do it. The basic questions on the slide should all be answered before writing starts. If the student has questions, this step is when to ask them, not when writing has already started. What is the subject? How long should the paper be? When is the paper due? Do I have to do research? Do I have to work alone or with others? What format do I have to use?

(8) Slide 8, How Can I Find Relevant Information? There are multiple sources of information, and many people who are ready to help find it. The librarians at CARL are very good sources and they are there primarily to assist students. One thing for students to keep in mind, particularly when finding information on the internet, is that they need to evaluate the source of data for its quality, reliability and objectivity. Just because it is on someones web site doesnt necessarily make it true. Information should be checked against more than one source. The Library Internet Interviews Personal experience Newspapers Magazines Lectures Discussions

(9) Slide 9, How Can I Get Ideas? Ideas come from multiple sources. One of the best techniques is just to start thinking about a subject and let the ideas flow; this is often called brainstorming. Students can brainstorm alone or in a group, writing things down as they come to mind, free-write what ever concerning the subject comes into their heads, or do things in a more organized fashion with lists or subject maps. In any case, students shouldnt initially restrict their ideas. They can pare the list down later, but if they cut things off too early, they may miss a really good idea that will help their writing. Brainstorming Free writing Listing Mapping Drawing Talking and listening Journal writing

Instructor Note: Some of these techniques, particularly brainstorming and free-writing, are going to be very unfamiliar and even uncomfortable for some students from cultures that do not encourage that type P910-EW-LP-5

of unconstrained behavior. Make sure that all the students understand that at CGSOC there are no bad ideas and they can all express themselves freely. Some students may still not wish to participate, and they should be gently encouraged to do so without making it a major public issue. (10) Slide 10, How Can I choose a Purpose? The central things for students to remember are that the purpose has to match the assignment, and that it must be what they themselves want to put across in their writing. They dont have to specifically express their purpose in so many words, but need to keep it in mind as a focus for their writing. Think about your assignment, your skills, your interests, and your knowledge. Look for relationships among your ideas and information. Ask Yourself: What do I want to achieve? What do I want to show? (11) Slide 11, How Can I Write a Good Thesis Statement? The thesis statement is the central idea you want to express in the essay. It needs to be short, and to have the basic characteristics shown on the slide. A thesis must be: Clear a complete sentence Specific not too general Supportable with evidence Strong not doubtful Coherent does not mix different topics Original includes the authors own idea (12) Slide 12, How Can I Write a Good Thesis Statement? What do you believe about the topic? What is your original idea? Are you well informed? Can you support your view with evidence and logic? Knowledge and Reflection = your own supportable view

Instructor Note: As with some other points in the lesson, some students may have a hard time with the concept of expressing their own opinions and supporting them with evidence. They need to understand that the CGSC expectation is that they will become informed on subjects they are writing on, and will express their own views, supported by evidence, no matter what they perceive the official view to be. (13) Slide 13, What Is Not a Good Thesis Sentence? When writing an essay, tell students to remember that they are expressing their ideas on a subject, supported by research, evidence, and logical argument. Using any of these characteristics as a thesis dilutes the value of their work and reduces the quality of their writing. Avoid Questions Judgments

P910-EW-LP-6

 Feelings Facts Other peoples views Instructor Note: After the three thesis statement slides, hand out the Example Thesis Statement sheet and give the students a few moments to read over it. Answer students questions. Tell them to keep the sheet handy as they go through the class to help them when they actually have to formulate a thesis statement. Ensure they understand that they cannot simply use these thesis statements for their own papers, but must do their own writing. (14) Slide 14, What Is The Format of An Essay? This is the format of a basic essay, which is usually a short paper on a single subject. However, most writing will follow basically the same pattern. Experienced writers may choose to follow a different model, but this is a good starting point. We will talk about each element of the essay separately. An Introduction A Body A Conclusion (15) Slide 15, What Is An Introduction? The Introduction sets the stage for the rest of the essay. It needs to get the readers attention, and let the reader know generally what will be said in the body of the essay. A poor introduction may mean that the rest of the essay will be poorly received, or not read at all. The Beginning Attention getting Presents the thesis Predicts the body One paragraph

(16) Slide 16, What Is A Body? The body of the essay is the meat this is where the author gets to make his case for his ideas. Present your ideas logically, each with evidence to support what you think. Generally, it is best practice to start each paragraph with a sentence that presents the main point of the paragraph, followed by the evidence and argument supporting the point. Clarity and logical order are essential. The middle Several paragraphs, each with: o Topic sentence (main idea of paragraph) Supporting points (explain main idea) facts, examples, descriptions Explanation and proof of the thesis Clear, thorough reasoning Ideas in logical order (17) Slide 17, What Is A Conclusion? The conclusion is you last chance to make your point to the reader. It should clearly summarize the main ideas you want to get across, and provide a clear, coherent ending to the essay. It shouldnt be a repeat of what you say in the body of the essay, but

P910-EW-LP-7

should make the reader remember the ideas you wrote about. The Ending One paragraph Restate the thesis, or Summarize the main points Concise, clear, reinforcement Avoid anything new Close smoothly, positively Make the reader remember

(18) Slide 18, How Can I Organize My Ideas Into a Plan? One of the keys to good writing is good organization, and good organization is based on finding the relationships between ideas we want to express, and the information we have to support those ideas. There are a lot of different relationships that we can use. Identify relationships among your ideas and information: General / Specific Cause / Effect Similarities / Differences Categories / Classifications Processes / Chronologies Problems / Solutions (19) Slide 19, How Can I Organize My Ideas Into a Plan? An outline is one of a writers most important tools. It allows the author to organize his thinking and provides a layout that then becomes the model for the actual writing. Writers can and should revise outlines as they work, several times if necessary, to develop the best possible organization for their writing. Rewrite your ideas in logical order make an outline Introduction with thesis Body Main Point (general) 1. Supporting point (specific) 2. Supporting point (specific) Main point, etc. Conclusion (20) Slide 20, How Can I Check My Outline? These are some questions a writer might ask about his outline to help focus on the purpose of writing, and ensure that the outline is a quality aid to the eventual product. Do I have enough support? Is my support balanced? Does every point support my thesis? Are my ideas in logical order? Did I consider opposing views?

P910-EW-LP-8

 Did I analyze the topic enough? Does my reasoning and my evidence prove my point? (21) Slide 21, How Do I Write a Good Draft? Remember that the draft is only the starting point in the actual writing of your essay. Stay focused on what it is you want to accomplish as you write. You may well make several drafts, revising and improving each time. Dont worry too much about grammar and mechanics initially you can take care of those matters later in the process. Focus Remember your purpose Write your thesis statement at the top Follow your outline Compose your draft quickly do not worry about grammar, yet Write the body first, then the introduction and conclusion

(22) Slide 22, How Do I Check and Revise? All good writers revise their work, often many times, before it is finished. If you can, once you have one good draft, walk away from your work for awhile, then come back and read it with a fresh mind. Think about how it will read to someone who has not been thinking about the subject as you have. Make sure your logic flows clearly, and each of your ideas is supported. Once your ideas are right, work on grammar and mechanics. Expect to rewrite your essay several times before it becomes a final product. Sleep on it wait 24 hours if you can Imagine you are the instructor then read your draft. First, check for a clear thesis, good reasoning and support, logical order Second, check for mechanics Third, check for style Rewrite, rewrite, rewrite

(23) Slide 23, But English is Not My Native Language!!! CGSC does not expect linguistic perfection. We know it can be hard to write well in a second language, but the process taught in this class can help a lot. Write to communicate clearly, and worry about mechanics later. You should learn to write on the computer as much as possible to save time retyping something you have written on paper can waste effort. Never be afraid to ask for help, either from a classmate or from an instructor the instructors are here to assist you if needed. However, remember that CGSC wants your work, not someone elses, and you will benefit most from the work you do yourself. Avoid translating word for word Write the first draft quickly Check mechanics later (spelling, grammar, vocabulary), then rewrite Compose on the computer Be concise, be direct Perfection is NOT required Ask for help, but DO YOUR OWN WORK

P910-EW-LP-9

Instructor Note: Some students are going to be intimidated by having to write in English, while others will have few problems. Encourage students to help each other, and offer assistance as needed to those who appear to be struggling with the language. In the case of a student who appears not to understand what is going on because of language problems, notify the IMSD. (24) Slide 24, Can I Really Be a Good Writer? Not every writer is going to win a Nobel Prize for Literature, but almost every writer can learn to produce good, sound products. These are some of the things that most good writers do that help them to do good writing. Remember, the point of writing is to get your ideas across to the reader, and these steps will help you to do that. Good writers follow a good process Good writers check and rewrite Good writers imagine the readers point of view Good writers think, think, think Good writers use computers Good writers avoid plagiarism

(25) Slide 25, The Ownership of Words and Ideas. In CGSOC, it is expected that every writing assignment will be the students own work, clearly expressing his or her ideas. This does not mean that you cannot use information or ideas from another source to support your work. It does mean that if you do it, you must clearly identify where the ideas or words came from. That can be by a footnote, mentioning the source in the body of the writing, or any other method that ensures the reader knows the source. If you use someone elses words or ideas without giving them credit, you are guilty of plagiarism. Plagiarism is a serious academic offense, and students can be expelled from CGSOC for it. Be careful You can borrow but you cannot steal Plagiarism is an academic crime theft of words or ideas Always identify the words or ideas of another person or source Use correct citation formats

Instructor Note: At this point, hand out the example citation sheet. (Appendix D) for students to review. They can use the sheet to assist them throughout their time in CGSOC. Tell the students to refer to the Hogue book they received in their initial issue or to Kate Turabians A Manual for Writers if they have questions. The CARL has multiple copies of Turabian, and it is available for purchase in the CGSC bookstore. (26) Slide 26, A Few Dos and Donts About Structure. These are some useful things to remember when writing, but dont become too worried about them in the early stages concentrate on your ideas in the drafting stages, then take care of structural problems as you rewrite for the final product. DO Use transitions Use active verbs Dont Use jargon P910-EW-LP-10

 Use very long sentences Use many passive verbs Instructor Note: You may need to explain terms used on this slide. Watch the student for indications of understanding or confusion and expand your comments as necessary. You should also be aware that for some students some of these rules (passive/active verbs, for example) may be different from how things are done in their native languages, and they may struggle somewhat as they work in English. (27) Slide 27, In Conclusion: The Process. Review the process, soliciting questions to be sure students understand how writing should flow. They should understand that this general process works for any type of writing assignment, not just the essay they will be writing for this class. Understand the assignment Gather information Generate ideas Establish a purpose Compose a thesis statement Make a plan Draft the composition Check and revise the composition

(28) Slide 28, The Parts Of An Essay. Review the elements of an essay to reinforce what the students have learned in the rest of the lesson. The Introduction Presents the thesis Predicts the body The Body Supports the thesis with reasoning and information The Conclusion Restates the thesis (29) Slide 29, Any Questions? Break: (10 minutes). f. Develop: (20 minutes) The instructor conducts a discussion with students about writing in English. The purpose of the discussion is to elicit student concerns, and to focus their attention on the value of the process taught in the class. Some suggested questions are:

How can you use what you learned today to help you with writing assignments in CGSOC? What one thing did you learn today that you will use when writing papers of any kind in the future? What one thing that you learned today that you think you will be able to use when writing once you return home?

P910-EW-LP-11

What did you find least useful in this lesson? Why? g. Apply (120 minutes) Give a 10-minute break at an appropriate point in the class. Instructor Note: Divide the staff group into three smaller groups, each with a butcher board and markers. Assign one student to be the group leader for each group, and one to be the recorder. Tell the groups that everyone must participate. Tell the groups they have 10 minutes to generate as many ideas as they can about the topic of leadership. They are to work as fast as they can, and write down all the ideas that group members come up with. At the end of 10 minutes, give the groups this purpose for writing What are the main characteristics of good leadership? The groups then have another 10 minutes to generate more ideas. Again, they are to write down all the ideas group members come up with. At the end of 10 minutes, instruct the students they will have 10 minutes to develop a thesis statement based on the ideas they have developed up to now. Once all the groups have developed their thesis statement, give them 30 minutes to develop an outline for a paper, derived from their ideas and using their thesis statements. At the end of the 30 minutes, have each group show their thesis statements and outlines and explain them to the other groups. Allow 5 to 10 minutes per group. Groups can ask questions of each other about how they arrived at a particular thesis or how they organized their outline as they did. Dont let the discussion move towards one group criticizing or attacking what another group has done. The object is to focus on the process of writing, not the product at this stage. Instructor Note: At this point, distribute the example essay handout. Give the students a few minutes to review the handout, and then go over the parts of the handout in order. Ensure the students understand where each part of the example fits in the essay writing process. Remind the students that they may NOT directly use any part of the example in their own writing, and that the actual subject for their essay will not be assigned until tomorrow. Day One Conclusion: (5 Minutes). (30) Slide 30, Homework. In your own opinion: What is a good leader? Describe a good leadergive examples. How can I become a good leader? Instructor Note: Explain that students will write answers to these questions at home in order to stimulate thinking and to lead up to the essay-writing session tomorrow. This could be called journal writing, or journaling. These answers will not be collected but must be brought back to class tomorrow. This is to help students start generating ideas for their essays (although we do not want to fully reveal the actual essay topic and assignment until tomorrow). Tell the students that the topic of the questionsleadership is much too broad for a short essay, and they must NOT try to start their essay tonight. They will find out the final writing assignment tomorrow. They are encouraged to work with their bilingual dictionaries P910-EW-LP-12

tonight to find English words related to their ideas on leadership. They may bring their dictionaries tomorrow. They will need their laptop computers and some paper (if they want to do any prewriting by hand) tomorrow. Day Two h. Apply: (240 minutes). Allow students to take breaks as needed. (31) Slide 31, Essay Writing Assignment. Write an essay no more than two pages in length. You will have a total of four hours working time. When you have finished your essay, turn in a printed copy to the instructor and email an electronic copy to the instructor. Follow the format and instructions in the handout. Instructor Note: You have two options for essay topics, and can assign either one to your students. 1. 2. Who influenced my leadership style the most? What I learned about leadership in my first assignment as an officer.

Pick a topic and write it on the whiteboard, announcing the topic to the class. Explain that students will be writing an essay NOW in class on the announced subject, using their personal experience and knowledge. They are to compose on the computer, although they may do some brainstorming or prewriting on paper. They are to use 12 point Times New Roman type and double spacing. They are to use 1inch side margins, 1 inch top margin and 1-inch bottom margin. The essay is to be a maximum of 2 pages. They are to put their names on the top of each page. They are to turn in a printed copy of their paper at the end of lab today and email a copy to the instructor. If they finish early, ask them to offer to assist other students. Their papers will not be returned to them, but they will receive feedback and a pass/fail grade. They are to save their essays on their computers. Ensure that students understand that the purpose of this period is to actually write an essay. Remain in the area and offer assistance as necessary. Students should take breaks as necessary. Be alert for students who may be struggling with their laptops. Collect the hard copy essays as students finish, and ensure they email you an electronic copy of their essays. Assess the essays using CGSC Form 1099W. Provide the completed 1009W to the students by the Monday after the end of P910. Email a copy of all the essays and 1009Ws to Mr. Brettmann in IMSD at the same time. i. Assessment Plan: (See Appendix A.).

8. ENVIRONMENTAL IMPACT STATEMENT: None. 9. RISK ASSESSMENT/RISK CONTROL MEASURES: None.

P910-EW-LP-13

US ARMY COMMAND AND GENERAL STAFF COLLEGE International Military Student Preparatory Course Lesson Plan for Lesson P910 English Writing Appendix A Assessment Plan Part of the students overall performance for the complete P910 International Military Student Preparatory Course is assessed in this lesson through the following: Essay Daily AAR & Journal P/F P/F

2. The student will write a 2 page essay on an assigned subject, in class. The essay will be graded as pass/fail based on the standards expressed in the ELO for the lesson: 3. The students work will be assessed in accordance with the standards defined in ST 22-2: Writing and Speaking Skills for Senior Leaders. Regardless of the nature of the specific requirement, the students demonstration of achieving an objective or competency is assessed against the following performance criteria: A Exceeded Standard. Represents the complete integration of critical reasoning, creative thinking, and evaluative skills as the student achieves course-learning objectives. The student is fluent in the logic of course content. There is abundant evidence of this integration in his/her essay. Furthermore, he/she mastered the effective writing of an essay. The essay includes a clearly stated thesis and analysis, its organization is suitable for the topic, it includes proper documentation of research, and lastly it includes the correct use of the passive voice. B Meets Standard. Represents the consistent application of critical reasoning skills as you achieve course learning objectives. The student is competent in the application of course content. There is frequent evidence of this application in his/her essay. Furthermore, he/she displays a competence in his/her writing in that the majority of the following elements are present in his/her essay: A clearly stated thesis and analysis. Organization suitable for the topic. Proper documentation of research. Correct use of the passive voice. C Below Standard. Represents comprehension of course content, but you are inconsistent in application. The student achieves most, but not all, course learning objectives as evidenced in his/her essay. Furthermore, he/she is not fully competent in the application of course content. The student displays a lack of competence in his/her writing. Furthermore, the writing lacks the majority of the following elements: A clearly stated thesis and analysis. Organization suitable for the topic. Proper documentation of research. Correct use of the passive voice.

P910-EW-LP-1

U Unsatisfactory. Represents a consistent failure to achieve course learning objectives. The student rarely, or minimally, demonstrates comprehension of course content and is not competent in applying it to his/her essay. He/she is not competent in writing an effective essay. The essay lacks: A clearly stated thesis and analysis. Organization suitable for the topic. Proper documentation of research. Correct use of the passive voice. See CGSC Form 1009W.

P910-EW-LP-2

ASSESSING WRITING WRITER: ASSIGNMENT/COURSE TITLE: INSTRUCTOR/DEPARTMENT: ARMY STANDARD defines good writing as understandable in a single, rapid reading and generally free of errors in grammar, mechanics, and usage. GRADE: (CGSOC) Pass__________ Fail____________ P910 English Essay DATE:

INSTRUCTOR COMMENTS: COGNITIVE LEVEL ATTAINED (Higher levels include characteristics of lower levels.) EVALUATION (Judging or weighing by building and using criteria and standards.) SYNTHESIS (Integrating parts into a new whole.) ANALYSIS (Breaking material down into component parts to determine structures and relationships.) APPLICATION (Use of knowledge to solve problems.) COMPREHENSION (Understanding of the material.) KNOWLEDGE (Recall of specific information.) 5.1.1 Assesses environment (people, events, and systems) then tailors message to convince others to P910-EW-AA-3

follow ideas and make a commitment

STUDENT COMMENTS:

P910-EW-AA-4

 Writing Assignment

ELO C.07 Action: Write an effective essay Condition: As a CGSOC International Military Student and member of a staff group; given concrete experiences, ST22-2; Writing Guides; and approved topic, and class discussion. St Standard: The Essay must include: 1. A clearly stated thesis 2. Clearly stated support and analysis 3. Organization suitable for the topic 4. Proper documentation of research 5. Correct use of passive voice Learning Level: Cognitive: Application Performance Level 1 Student Assessment No stated purpose. No clear thesis. No introduction of major points. DEVELOPMENT Major points do not support thesis. Fails to consider multiple viewpoints. Does not address implications or consequences of the proposed assertion (thesis). Sequencing of major/minor points does not support writers purpose. Fails to show how evidence supports main points/thesis. Does not anticipate questions. Fallacies abound within the essay. No transitions. CONCLUSION EW-LP-AA-4 Major points partially support thesis. Presents other points of view but does not reason through them. Partially addresses implications or consequences of the proposed assertion (thesis). Sequencing of major/minor points partially supports writers purpose. Weak analysis of evidence to show how it supports main points/thesis. Identifies but does not answer anticipated questions. Some fallacies exist within the essay. Transitions are not always clear. Major points fully support thesis. Clearly and fairly discusses multiple points of view. Addresses implications or consequences of the proposed assertion (thesis). Sequencing of major/minor points effectively supports writers purpose. Clear reasoning that shows how evidence supports main points/thesis. Identifies and answers anticipated questions. Essay is free of fallacies. Transitions effectively connect major/minor points.

5
Instructor

Introduction Purpose for writing is vague or not clearly stated. Thesis is not focused or not relevant to the purpose. Vague introduction of major points.

Purpose for writing is clear and specific. Thesis is clearly stated and focused. Clear introduction of major points that are relevant to the thesis.

No conclusion or one that does not support the thesis. Conclusion is disconnected from the evidence and reasoning, or it introduces new ideas. STYLE AND GRAMMAR Numerous sentences that are wordy and vague. Paragraphs contain sentences not relevant to the topic. Primarily passive voice.

Conclusion partially supports thesis. Conclusion is not strongly linked to the evidence and reasoning, or it is not concise. Some sentences are not always clear. Some paragraphs are confusing or vague. Some passive voice not excessive.

Conclusion is clear and reinforces thesis and major parts. Conclusion is fully justified by the evidence and the reasoning, and it is concise. Clear, concise sentences. Clear, concise paragraphs that include topic sentences. Primarily active voice.

P910-EW-AA-5

US ARMY COMMAND AND GENERAL STAFF COLLEGE International Military Student Preparatory Course Lesson Plan for Lesson P910 English Writing Appendix B Slides Slide Number Slide 1 Slide 2 Slide 3 Slide 4 Slide 5 Slide 6 Slide 7 Slide 8 Slide 9 Slide 10 Slide 11 Slide 12 Slide 13 Slide 14 Slide 15 Slide 16 Slide 17 Slide 18 Slide 19 Slide 20 Slide 21 Slide 22 Slide 23 Slide 24 Slide 25 Slide 26 Slide 27 Slide 28 Slide 29 Slide 30 Slide 31 Description/Title Lesson Title Job One Why This Process and Format? Class Time What You Will Learn What Is the Writing Process? What is My Assignment? How Can I Find Relevant Information? How Can I Get ideas? How Can I Choose a Purpose? How Can I Write a Good Thesis Statement? How Can I Write a Good Thesis Statement? What is NOT a Good Thesis Statement? What is the Format of An Essay? What is An Introduction? What is a Body? What is a Conclusion? How Can I Organize My Ideas Into a Plan? How Can I Organize My Ideas Into a Plan? How Can I Check My Outline? How Do I Write a Good Draft? How Do I Check and Revise? But English is Not My Native Language!!! Can I Really Be A Good Writer? The Ownership of Words and Ideas. A Few Dos and Donts About Structure. In Conclusion: The Process The Parts of An Essay. Any Questions? Homework Essay Writing Assignment.

P910-EW-AB-1

US ARMY COMMAND AND GENERAL STAFF COLLEGE International Military Student Preparatory Course Lesson Plan for Lesson P910 English Writing Appendix C Thesis Statement Handout The attached Thesis Statement Handout is to be distributed to the students after covering Slide 13 during the GNI phase of the lesson. Allow the students time to review the handout, dealing with any questions they may have. Tell them to keep the handout for reference during the various writing assignments they will have at CGSOC.

P910-EW-AC1

US ARMY COMMAND AND GENERAL STAFF COLLEGE International Military Student Preparatory Course P910 English Writing Example Essay Thesis Statements A thesis must be Clear a complete sentence Specific not too general Supportable with evidence Strong not doubtful Coherent does not mix different topics Original includes the authors own idea

Military leadership is the act of persuading someone to agree with and act on an idea, even when that idea may entail the greatest personal risk. Good leaders all share certain basic characteristics, with personal example being the most important. Leadership and management are two different things: leadership focuses on people and management focuses on things. Self-sacrifice is one of the central characteristics of every great leader. Effective leadership in a military unit is a powerful combat multiplier, while ineffective leadership will take the strongest organization down the path of failure. In this essay I will discuss the three major lessons I have learned as an officer: respect must be earned, learning does not stop when you leave a training institution, and command is not a popularity contest. As leaders, the time we spend planning and preparing will reduce the uncertainties and hardships associated with our missions. One of the first lessons I learned as an army officer was that my skills as a leader had a direct, personal influence on the soldiers I led, and they in turn had a direct personal influence on me as a commander. Military officers carry leadership responsibilities that are almost unknown in civilian life: the success, welfare, and the very lives of the soldiers we lead depend on the quality of the decisions we make and the orders we give.

P910-EW-AC1

US ARMY COMMAND AND GENERAL STAFF COLLEGE International Military Student Preparatory Course P910 English Writing Appendix D - Example Citation Handout The attached Example Citation Handout is to be distributed to the students after covering Slide 13 during the GNI phase of the lesson. Allow the students time to review the handout, dealing with any questions they may have. Tell them to keep the handout for reference during the various writing assignments they will have at CGSOC.

P910-EW-AD1

US ARMY COMMAND AND GENERAL STAFF COLLEGE International Military Student Preparatory Course P910 English Writing Example Citation Handout

In the course of your time in CGSOC, you will be required to turn in a number of written papers of various types. Many of these papers will require you to include footnotes or bibliographies citing the publications you used in researching the assignment. This handout covers examples of formats for citing the most common types of documents you will encounter. If you have any questions concerning how or when to cite a source, ask your instructor. The examples below show first the general format to be used for each type of document, and then a specific example. You should note that when the format or example uses italic type, then you should put that part of your citation in italics. Also, follow the punctuation styles shown in the example between portions of the citation. There are two main places where you must cite the sources for information: the bibliography where you will list all of the sources you used; and the footnotes (shown at the end of a page) or endnotes (shown at the end of a section, chapter or the paper), which is where you will cite the source of specific information in your paper. The two types of citations use slightly different formats. In the bibliography, you will list all your sources in alphabetical order by the authors last name. Footnotes or endnotes are numbered by the order in which they appear in the paper, and the authors name is shown in normal (First name, Last name) order. You should also note that the two types of citations are indented a little differently, and that for a footnote or endnote you must cite the specific page(s) where the information came from.
Book Use this format when citing information from a commercially published book. FORMAT: Author(s). Title of book. Place of publication: Publisher. Date [pages] BIBLIOGRAPHY EXAMPLE: Okuda, Michael, and Denise Okuda. Star Trek chronology: The history of the future. New York: Pocket Books. 1993 FOOTNOTE EXAMPLE 1 Michael Okuda and Denise Okuda. Star Trek chronology: The history of the future. New York: Pocket Books. 1993, p. 65 NOTE: When a book has more than one author, the lead authors name is listed as Last Name, First Name and all other authors are listed in normal name order.

P910-EW-AD2

Military Publication Use this format when citing information from a military or other government publication FORMAT: Organization, specific office (if given), publication number, title, and page number(s). Proponent, location, date of manual. BIBLIOGRPAHY EXAMPLE: U.S. Department of the Army, Command and General Staff College, Student Text 22-2 , Writing and Speaking Skills for Senior Leaders, 3-2, 3-17. Fort Leavenworth, Kansas, 1998. FOOTNOTE EXAMPLE 1 Department of the Army, U.S. Army Command and General Staff College . ST 22-2, Writing and Speaking Skills for Senior Leaders (Fort Leavenworth, KS: USACGSC, August 1998), 2-5. Journal Article Use this format when citing information from an article in an academic or professional journal FORMAT: Author(s). Date. Title of Article. Title of Periodical Volume (Date): Pages. BIBLIOGRAPHY EXAMPLE: Wilcox, Rhonda V. Shifting roles and synthetic women in StarTrek: The Next Generation. Studies in Popular Culture 13 (June 1991): 53-65. FOOTNOTE EXAMPLE 1 Rhonda V. Wilcox. Shifting roles and synthetic women in StarTrek: The Next Generation. Studies in Popular Culture 13 (June 1991): 53-65 Newspaper or Magazine Article Use this format when citing information from a newspaper or general circulation magazine. FORMAT: Author(s). Title of Article. Title of Periodical, Date, Pages. BIBLIOGRPAHY EXAMPLE: Di Rado, Alicia. Trekking through college: Classes explore modern society using the world of Star Trek. Los Angeles Times,15 March 1995, A3. FOOTNOTE EXAMPLE 1 Alicia Di Rado. Trekking through college: Classes explore modern society using the world of Star Trek. Los Angeles Times,15 March 1995, A3. Book Article or Chapter Use this format when citing information from a book which is a collection of individual articles or separate chapters by a number of authors, or on a number of separate subjects by a single author. FORMAT: Author(s). Title of Article or Chapter. Title of Book, author/editor, pages. Place of publication: Publisher. Date. P910-EW-AD3

BIBLIOGRAPHY EXAMPLE: James, Nancy E. ed.. Two sides of paradise: The Eden myth according to Kirk and Spock. In Spectrum of the fantastic, 219-223. Westport, CT: Greenwood. 1988 FOOTNOTE EXAMPLE 1 Nancy E. James, ed. Two sides of paradise: The Eden myth according to Kirk and Spock. Spectrum of the fantastic, 219-223. Westport, CT: Greenwood. 1988 Website Use this format when citing information from a book or publication you found on the internet. Note that you must put the words [on-line] in brackets after the publications name. Microsoft Word is programmed to recognize web addresses, known as Universal Resource Locators or URLs and will automatically underline them. You must put all the punctuation in URLs for them to be usable. FORMAT: Author(s). Title of Book.[on-line] Place of Publication: Publisher; Date of publication, Date that you accessed the information, Specific URL For the website BIBLIOGRAPHY FORMAT Lynch, Tim. DS9 Trials and Tribble-ations review [on-line]. Peoria, IL: Bradley University; 1996. Accessed 8 October 1997. Available from http://www.bradley.edu/campusorg/psiphi/DS9/ep/503r.html FOOTNOTE FORMAT Tim Lynch, DS9 Trials and Tribble-ations review [on-line]. Peoria, IL: Bradley University; 1996. Accessed 8 October 1997. Available from http://www.bradley.edu/campusorg/psiphi/DS9/ep/503r.html Remember, if at any time you have questions about how or when to cite the source of information in one of your papers, ask an instructor or another student for help.
1

P910-EW-AD4

US ARMY COMMAND AND GENERAL STAFF COLLEGE International Military Student Preparatory Course P910 English Writing Appendix E - Example Essay Handout The attached Example Essay Handout is to be distributed to the students at the end of the Develop phase of the lesson. Allow the students time to review the handout, dealing with any questions they may have. Tell them to keep the handout for reference during the various writing assignments they will have at CGSOC.

P910 -EW-AE1

US ARMY COMMAND AND GENERAL STAFF COLLEGE International Military Student Preparatory Course P910 English Writing Example Essay Handout This handout includes a sample IMSPC essay, written by a student from a previous year, along with an example idea sheet, and an example outline. These documents are provided to help familiarize you with the essay writing process. You should NOT use these documents in your own writing your work must be your own. You should NOT start writing your essay based on this example the actual subject for this years essay will not be assigned until tomorrow. IDEA SHEET The idea sheet is the product of a short brainstorming session on the subject of leaders. While this sheet was composed and printed by computer, you can work by hand on paper, on a whiteboard or butcher paper, or by any other method you are comfortable with. The important thing is to develop as many ideas as you can on the subject in order to help you determine exactly what it is you want to write. OUTLINE The example outline illustrates how an author might lay out an essay. You should develop a similar outline, supporting your own ideas, for your essay. You can use any numbering system you choose. Remember, this is a working document, so your outline may change as you write. SAMPLE ESSAY In the sample essay the three main elements, Introduction, Body, and Conclusion, have been boxed off and labeled. It is not necessary for you to do that for your essay, but all three elements must be present. As you read the essay, identify in your own mind the thesis statement, and for each paragraph in the body of the essay, identify the main point in the paragraph, and the supporting arguments the author makes.

P910 -EW-AE2

EXAMPLE IDEA SHEET Subject Leader Officer Respect Caring Influence Stamina Fairness Communicating Determination Guide Weak Lazy Absent Vision Disinterested Persuasion Conviction Firmness Personal example Organized Model Stupid Inspiring Persuade Poorly trained Frightened Direct Incompetent Soldier Lead Competence Power Harsh Born or made? Honesty Knowledge Self Sacrifice Training Follow Experience Concerned Strength Openness Listening Courage Integrity Involved

This can be handwritten or done on the computer or a whiteboard. It can be freeform, as this example is, or a list, or any other format you wish. Note that not all the ideas on the sheet are positives. Sometimes negative ideas can be used to help formulate concepts or to clearly express them. Contrasting a negative and a positive aspect of the same idea can be an effective writing tool. Dont reject an idea simply because it is negative.

P910 -EW-AE3

SAMPLE OUTLINE Thesis In this essay I will discuss three lessons that I learned which I have tried to follow throughout my career. Body: A: Caring Leader 1. Soldiers are the reason for leaders 2. Caring for soldiers is all-encompassing 3. Leaders make a difference B. Lead by Example 1. Exercise example 2. Example inspired NCOs 3. Positive feedback C. Meet conflict head-on 1. Personality conflict 2. Search for solution and good advice 3. Resolution of conflict Conclusion:

P910 -EW-AE4

SAMPLE ESSAY Put your name in the header on each page of your essay. LESSONS I LEARNED IN MY FIRST MILITARY ASSIGNMENT INTRODUCTION Although the Canadian Infantry School does an excellent job of tactically preparing a young officer for his first command, there is always a sense of apprehension upon taking command. Will I measure up? Will they like me? Do I know what I am doing? These were the questions that were in the back of my mind when I assumed command of my first platoon. The lessons I learned from my first command are many and varied. In this essay I will discuss three lessons that I learned which I have tried to follow throughout my career.

BODY Infantry officers, unlike most other services, exist to lead soldiers. Without the soldier the infantry officer would not be required, therefore taking care of soldiers has to be your primary concern. This was the first lesson my Company Commander drilled into all his new Platoon Commanders. He did not care how tactically competent we were (that would come with time), but he had no time for an officer who did not care for the soldiers under his command. I quickly found myself embroiled in all aspects of the lives of my Platoon members. I learned how important this was when I was thanked by a soldier for some assistance I had given to his family on a personal matter. It was then that I realized that my soldiers relied upon me for more than just orders, and I could make a difference in their lives. The second lesson that I learned was to always lead by example. This lesson was particularly brought home during my first Battalion Winter Exercise, in the harsh climate of Northern Canada. The weather was extremely cold and we had been advancing on foot, into a storm, all day long. In extreme conditions it is vital that soldiers maintain proper Winter Warfare discipline (which is difficult to do).

P910-EW-AE5

Despite personal fatigue, whenever we stopped for a rest or tactical pause I made a point of moving up and down the platoon lines ensuring my soldiers were hydrated, taking care of their feet, and enforcing the buddy system. As a result of my checking, my NCOs also ensured the soldiers followed the proper precautions and we had no injuries. I was later commended by my company commander for my conduct on the exercise, as my platoon was the only one without cold weather injuries in the company. The final lesson that I will discuss is one of meeting conflict head-on, regardless of how unpleasant. Personality conflicts arise at some points in time, and this occurred with one of my Platoon 2ics. I had already been in command for one year when I received a new 2ic. Soon after his arrival I left for a three month course, and upon my return I felt that he was trying to retain command of the platoon. The situation had certainly affected our relationship, and it was having a negative reaction on the platoon. After several months, and prior to a two month deployment, I discussed my problem with my Company Sergeant Major. He advised me to tackle the problem head on. Despite feeling uncomfortable, I confronted my 2ic and found (to my surprise) that he felt I was not supporting him properly. We recognized our mutual problem, and set upon a solution to resolve our differences, setting out clear expectations for each of us to follow. Although we never became personally close our professional relationship improved considerably, for the benefit of the Platoon.

CONCLUSION Throughout my career I have tried to follow the lessons I learned as a new Lieutenant. I consider taking care of my soldiers, setting a good example, and dealing with adversity head on are good rules for a leader to follow. These rules have served me well over the past 21 years, and will continue to do so.

P910 -EW-AE6