THE GOSPEL OF BUCKY DENNIS

by J. R. Parks

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The Gospel of Bu ky !ennis "opyri#ht $%&% by J. R. Parks 'll ri#hts reser(ed. )ithout limitin# the ri#hts under opyri#ht reser(ed abo(e* no part of this publi ation may be reprodu ed* stored in or introdu ed into a retrie(al system* or transmitted* in any form* or by any means +ele troni * me hani al* photo opyin#* re ordin#* or otherwise, without the prior written permission of both the opyri#ht owner and the abo(e publisher of this book. This is a work of fi tion. -ames* hara ters* pla es* brands* media* and in idents are either the produ t of the author.s ima#ination or are used fi titiously. The author a knowled#es the trademarked status and trademark owners of (arious produ ts referen ed in this work of fi tion* whi h ha(e been used without permission. The publi ation/use of these trademarks is not authori0ed* asso iated with* or sponsored by the trademark owners. License Notes This ebook is li ensed for your personal use only. This ebook may not be sold or #i(en away to other people. 2f you would like to share this book with another person* please download an additional opy for ea h person you share it with. Thank you for respecting the author's work.

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T BLE OF CONTENTS
3ississippi Sunshine 4oodoo )i0ard 5onky Tonk ...The 5ershall T. )e6ford 7 3uddy* Bloody 3idni#ht Eidolon The 8ifth Trumpet 9f 'baddon 9thers ' !ate )ith Edward 5erbert 9n Southern Gothi Southern Gothi Spe ial Thanks 'bout The 'uthor ***** $ 'nd he had in his hand a little book open: and he set his ri#ht foot upon the sea* and his left foot on the earth* : 'nd ried with a loud (oi e* as when a lion roareth: and when he had ried* se(en thunders uttered their (oi es. ; 'nd when the se(en thunders had uttered their (oi es* 2 was about to write: and 2 heard a (oi e from hea(en sayin# unto me* Seal up those thin#s whi h the se(en thunders uttered* and write them not. 1 Re(elation &%:$1; *****

!ISSISSIPPI SUNSHINE
3ississippi #ets damn hot in the summer* the kind of hot that #ets stu k in your hest like

#ra(y and makes you feel sleepy at noon. 5ell* it was #onna be dark soon and there 2 was tryin# to peel my sti ky ass off the (inyl seats of my <=> "har#er. 2 twisted around the steerin# wheel like a damn fly on #lue paper* my ass wetter than a nun on Saint Patty>s. 2nsuran e forms were s attered o(er the ba k seat. 2 was late as a Prom ?ueen. @ater* e(en. @ate weren>t e(en the word. 2 was upside1down fu ked by a sil(erba k #orilla. )hat a mess* 2>ll tell you what. 'nd that wasn>t e(en the half of it. 2 fi6ed my tie in the rear(iew mirror* ombed down the bushy mutton hops and handlebar Asta he. 2 took one last shot of Ja kie !. from my hip flask* twirlin# it like Bill 5i kok. 5ad to strai#hten out my lass rin# too* 4erney 5i#h 8ootball &=<;. That baby was solid sil(er and fi6ed with my mama>s birthstone. 8ine raftsmanship. 2 had a lot of pride in that little rin#* but 2>ll be damned if it weren>t embarrassin# sometimes. 3y knu kles still killed me from the brawl the ni#ht before. 3ore like a an of ass whoopin> reallyB 2 was too drunk. Stumbled o(er myself like a silly fool. !amn. 2 made a mo(e on another man>s lady. The bla k eye wasn>t #ood for business either* so 2 sported some o(ersi0ed a(iators 2 #ot in Sai#on. Sli k too* made me look like a musta hioed Johnny "ash. 2 was rollin>* babeChell who was 2 kiddin#* 2 looked awful* felt worseCbut that ertainly weren>t sayin> mu h. Probably why the E6 took the kids to 8lorida with "asper. "asperD )ho in the world names their boy* "asperD Shit* she wasn>t the best lady* but better than that slea0y hump. But then a#ain* at least he was there for her. 7ep* 2 was a deadbeat s offlawCan old timey dinosaur* drownin# in the bottle* spendin# my days rompin# around with a suit ase impersonatin# an insuran e salesman. !oor to door at first* but 2 worked my way up to old allin#. 7eah* 2>m that #uyB the one you hate allin> durin# that rerun of Taxi while you>re mun hin# that mi rowa(able lasa#na. People #et mean when they>re hun#ry too. @ike man#y strays fi#htin# o(er dumpster s raps. Sometimes you #et lu ky thou#h. That>s why 2 was in the ar stewin> in my own ass water. 2 had a poli y to sell. 5is name was Jerry Sea(er. 7eah* Sea(erCyou know* like the family from Growing Pains? ' ri h out1of1towner* he built a (a ation home or some business. 2 don>t know who takes (a ations out here. 8rankly* 2>d rather build somethin> in 3aui* at h a few rays* maybe #et me some of that islander tan#. But hey* whate(er floats your turd* Jerry. Shitty #i#* but steady work with all the hypo hondria s in the worldB a lot of new folks in town too* #ettin# work at the Ja kson(ille "anned Spa#hetti 8a tory. People omin> and #oin>.

People you ould talk into Eust about any poli y with the ri#ht s are ta ti s. 2 weren>t mu h of a dooms dayer* but it pays the ele tri ity bills. 'nd ba k then* when 2 pushed doorbells for #reen Cwhen the sun went down* shit man* it stayed dark. So there 2 stood* kno kin> Jerry Sea(er>s door* hopin# he wouldn>t #et a #limpse of the wet diamond on the ba k of my short slee(ed dress shirt* two si0es too small. 5e li(ed in an old* two story ountry house* painted blue* built in the forties maybe. 5ad those lassi Southern pillars on it and #rimy folia#e han#in# from the dereli t bal ony. @ooked like the pla e #ot reno(ated or some su h* most of the se ond floor was under plasti tarps* blowin# in the wind* shiny in the twili#ht sun. Shit* 2 was late. Jerry was probably Eust #ettin#> ready to sit down for boob tube. The door opened wi kedly fast and there stood 3r. Sea(er* damn near four foot hi#h* kind of sFuirrelly* with beady doll>s eyes. 5e had sli ked ba k blonde hair and a bu k1toothed #rin. GGood e(enin#* 3r. Sea(er* 2>m here from 4erney 2nsuran e. 8irst of all* 2>d like to apolo#i0e for bein# so tardy* traffi was somethin# else.H Traffi D Shit man* after About ten years of makin> e6 uses* you plum run out of the le(er ones. Traffi in a town like 4erney was as likely as whores in a monastery. But then a#ainD G'h yes* 3r. !ennis is itD -o need for apolo#ies we an #et started ri#ht away*H Jerry said in a thi k a ent. 5e sounded En#lish* maybe 'ussie. G9f ourse* sir. 2>(e #ot your plan ri#ht here in my brief ase* all you need to do is si#n a few forms and we>ll ha(e this pla e insured.H 2 tapped the suit ase* prayin# to God 2 didn>t lea(e any forms floatin> around in the ba kseat of the "har#er. Jerry smiled with ti#htly pursed lips. 5e wore a ti#ht* yellow spande6 sin#le suit with blue stripes. 3an* 2 hoped he worked out. 7ou know* ardioD Threads like that ould #et a feller killed in 3ississippi. G7es* yes. "ome ri#ht in. 7ou an see 2>m ha(in# a lot of work done. Bloody ontra tor>s been out for weeks. 2>m Fuite annoyed with him. 2 think 2>ll ha(e to hire out a new ompany.H GSorry to hear it* sir. 2 tell you what* 2>ll make a few phone alls if you>d like. 2 know some #uys in town that do fi6tures.H Still talkin> out of my ass* 2>d make up anythin#. See* you>(e #ot to seem like you>re really helpful. "lients di# a problem sol(er* espe ially one who ares. -ot that 2 did or anythin#. Shit* 2 didn>t are about tomorrow. 2 only ared about makin> enou#h money to drink myself ba k twenty years. 3aybe sto k up a few artons of menthol i#arettes

from Rainbow. Jerry led me throu#h the door into the house. -i e pla e* walls de orated with some of that fine hina* looked like a olle tion. There were fa es painted on them* like e(eryday folks you>d see around town. 9ne #uy looked like this old fart named Barney that worked a pi00a Eoint in the early mornin#s. 2 bummed i#arettes off of him whene(er 2 was by. Bastard looked like a ni#htmare (ersion of myselfCmeaner* older* fatter. 'nyway* 2>d #o in there from time to time after a lon# ni#ht* order myself a 5awaiian. That old fu ker>d he kle me fier e: G7ou e(er been in a sinkin> ship* boyD 7ou e(er mess yourself on the de k of a destroyerDH 9ld #uy ser(ed on the I. S. S. 'ri0ona. 5e sur(i(ed the Japanese atta k at Pearl 5arbor. That must ha(e been a tou#h #i# too. 'nyway* the #uy>s fa e han#in> on the wall looked Eust like him. Spittin> ima#e. G2 make them myself. 2 enEoy apturin# people>s fa es*H Jerry e6plained. G'lri#ht* we an settle in the kit hen. 3ay 2 #et you somethin# to drink* 3r. !ennis.H Jerry eyed the pit stains wellin# up under my arms. G9h #osh* that>d be #reat* sir. 'nd all me Bu ky* all my friends do.H Bu ky !ennis* after my un le 3i key GBu kH !ennisCa semi1pro ball player in Jentu ky until he was arrested for mopery: mopery with the intent to e6pose himself. 2t happened in my teens. 5ell of a ball player* almost si#ned a few times. 2t>s funny how nobody remembers that thou#hCEust him streakin> by that senior enter with his Eunk in the bree0e. GBu ky. 5rm* interestin# name.H Jerry opened the (inta#e refri#erator and poured me a #lass of pineapple Eui e. 3ust be a health food nut* but it e6plained the stret hy threads. !amn* pineapple Eui e went down smooth and tan#y. G-i e pla e you #ot here* sir.H Small talk>s the way to keep Aem interested. People buy the salesman not the produ t. 5ell* 2 know 2 would. There was this one time in Ban#kokK G7es well* on e the pla e is finished. 2t>s a (a ation home really* a pla e to #et some pri(a y.H Jerry wa(ed his arm around. The kit hen had a #ranite island in the enter* looked like all the abinets needed to be put in thou#h. "ereal bo6es and the tin ans of that Ja kson(ille Spa#hetti lined the e6posed shel(es. That Brit wasn>t mu h for taste* but that>s how it was o(er there. Ri#htD Bad food. "rooked teeth. G)here you (a ationin# fromDH G@ondon* a tually. 2>m a trader there.H 5e was smu# about it too. G7eah* 2 bet there>s a lot of stress that #oes alon# with that #i#.H

G9h yes. 2t>s killer. But 2 ha(e my dish paintin#. 'nd 2 used to play a #reat deal of ri ket in the sprin#.H Jerry fli ked his fin#ers tryin# to ommuni ate somethin#. Took a swi# of pineapple Eui e. G7eah ri ket* that>s what y>all all so er out there.H Jerry pi ked up the poli y folder. G)ell* 3r. Sea(er should we #et on with the paperwork* so 2 don>t take up anymore of your timeDH 2 laid the old suit ase onto the kit hen table* opened it up and sta ked his poli y ri#ht ne6t to a (ase of petunias. Pineapple Eui e was really hittin# the spot. G7es* 2>d like to #o o(er some of these if you don>t mind.H G-ot a problem. 7ou #o ri#ht ahead and #i(e those a on e o(er. Sometimes they>re dense* but hey* so are those laim in(esti#ators.H 2 sFuee0ed out a lau#h* weak as it was. G7es*H Jerry said abruptly* hardly payin# attention. Those Brits are strai#ht to business kinda #uys* no nonsense. ' few minutes passed and 2 started feelin> the stin# in my bladder. 2 had an abnormally small bladder. 2>m talkin> a freakin> peanut. "an>t e(en finish a up of offee before 2 start leakin# like a toddler. 2t made my tweens a ni#htmare. The e6 ne(er ut me any sla k and she ne(er let it #o. 2 interrupted our weddin# ni#ht for a minute pee. She used to all me Tina Tinkle* A ause 2 was like the si6 year old in my dau#hter>s Girl S out Troop. Poor thin# pissed herself e(ery God damned meetin#* must ha(e been a ner(ous ti k. 3y e6Cwhat a fu kin> bit h. G2>m not seein# flood dama#e*H Jerry said. G2t is thereCri#ht beneath fire.H Guy was a sti kler* but my honies weren>t twisted about it. 8u kin> pineapple Eui e was the only thin# on my mind. 3y insides swelled up. 'nd my ba k teeth weren>t Eust floatin> they were damn well #oin# down with the Titani . Shit on me. 2 had to pee. Jerry Eust sat there thumbin# the pa#es* 0ippin> ri#ht to left like a oked up typewriter. ?ui k as a whip* pa#e to pa#e. The man was s rupulous. GIh* e6 use me. 3ay 2 use your restroomDH G7es* of ourse. The loo>s upstairs to the left* two doors down.H GThanks* mu h appre iated.H 2 ran up them stairs li kity split. They reaked and whinnied like a donkey #ettin> friendly with a mare. The se ond floor was in serious disrepair and the broken up drywall left wide open rawlspa es. !in#y* turFuoise paint peelin#s slowly sa##ed* erodin# with ne#le t and so##y

3ississippi humidity. 2t was worked on* 2 ould tell. Tools s attered about messilyB e(en a brand new* hrome paint sprayer oiled up with about twel(e #allons of #reen wood sealant. 2 fle6ed my stoma h and walked into the Eohn. GJesus 5oudini "hristLH 3y first step into the bathroom and 2 nearly fell throu#h a si61 foot hole in the linoleum. 3y hearted murmured and e(erythin#. That ain>t keen if you drink like a ri(er and smoke like a himney. G3ind your step* 3r. !ennisLH Jerry alled from the kit hen* GThere>s a nasty #ap in the floorin#Cold bathtub rashed ri#ht throu#h.H !ark outside* 2 wat hed the moon rise o(er the weepin# willow in the yard. The nasty dent in the hood of my "har#er shined in the pale li#ht. 2 undid my drawers. G)hat theChuhDH 2 flipped on the li#ht to find two* por elain bowls #leamin# under the fluores ents. 5ell* 2 already had my di k in my hand and e(erythin#. GIh* oh yes* uh 3r. !ennisD Ise the toilet on the ri#ht* one by the hole isn>t installed. Should ha(e had it hauled out weeks a#oLH 2 didn>t answer. 2 Eust aimed and put a fire out. 2 whi00ed like a hamp and let me tell you* there ain>t nothin> 2 know that>s as #ood. The minute pee. Better than se6 and pan akes. @ife has a way of pissin> on Eust about e(erybody. )e all #et tu kered out* battered and broken by our own demons. 8eels #ood to piss ba k. But don>t #et o ky* A ause life>ll Eust shit on you smilin#. 'nd when the E6 took the kidsC2 stank for years. But lea(in# the 'rmyD That was the andy in my piMata. Thin#s made more sense in the 'rmy. Sleep* fi#hts* and how. Thin#s #ot done too. 9ut here a man an>t e(en pat h up the holes in his Eohn* needless to say* the hole in his heart. 2 fid#eted with my tie. I#ly thin# made out to be a hessboard or somethin#. 2 looked at my mu# in the mirror. Took a real hard look. The a(iator shades had to ome offCdidn>t want Jerry thinkin# 2 was one of those* G2 wear my sun#lasses at ni#htH hipsters. 'h* hell. 2 looked like a Ja k Russell Terrier with the bla k eye. "ourtesy of the beauty>s beef ake at the bar. 5e didn>t mu h like the way 2 hounded his lady. )ho wouldD 8ine thin# thou#h* almond* sky blue eyes* ni e hour#lass fi#ure* dark supple skin. 2 tell you if 2 was in my own bathroom 2>d ha(e sFuee0ed one off. 2 fi6ed my musta he with the tiny wallet omb 2 kept nested ne6t to my dau#hters. 2 kissed their photo#raph. 3innie and 3ay* both ei#ht years oldChadn>t seen them in fifteen months. 2

washed up* wearin# a frown in the mirror. !ried my hands on a la ey towel with a @ittle Red Ridin# 5ood pattern. "ute stuff. 3oon shone pretty too* one bi# white eyeball in the 3ississippi sky. @ooked like he>d wink at you after a few shots of Ja kie !. 2 heard a #lass shatter down stairs. 8i#ured 2 should help lean up* him bein> su h a ni e feller and all. 2 peeked throu#h the #apin# bathroom hole. G5ey* 3r. Sea(er* 2>ll be ri#ht down.H 2 peered into the upside1down kit hen from the eilin#. The petunia (ase was in pie es* watery #lass mi6ed with (iolets e(erywhere. 2 stepped o(er the hole towards the door when 2 saw a dartin# blur mo(e below in the li(in# room. G5ey* 3r. Sea(er* mi#ht want to keep that do# away form the #lass. 7ou know those mutts* don>t know what>s #ood eatin>.H ' ru kus broke out downstairs: rashin#* thrashin#* shatterin#. GJerryD 7ou all ri#ht down thereDH 2 whistled to the do#. G"ome on* boy. Git out the houseLH The noise stopped. -othin#ness bu00ed in absolute silen e. Blood in my ears thumped like a 5uey o(er a Eun#le inse t symphony. The ri kets outside went still. -o fiddles. 2 opened the door and made my way down the hall* poor bastard probably had a heart atta k. Shit* he>d be layin# there in his yellow spande6 sin#le suit* ou#hin# and whee0in#. 2>d ha(e to do mouth to mouth or somethin#. G7ou>re supposed to #i(e Aem asprin* ri#htDH 2 asked myself. 5ea(y steps made their way up from downstairs. !amn* what a s are. Thou#ht Jerry was a #oner for sure. Jesus 5oudini* 2 thou#ht. The banister #roaned* 2 didn>t remember it #roanin> beforeCbut it definitely #roaned ri#ht then* sort of #rowled too. Stupid mutt* 2 thou#ht. GGitLH 8urious sniffin# followed my s oldin#. 3eanwhile* alls 2 ould think about was Jerry* my lient flounderin# in the kit hen of his brand spankin> new (a ation home* wallowin# in insuran e papers* #aspin# for air like a #oldfish on the sidewalk. Then 2 fro0e. 3y balls shri(eled up like raisins and 2 felt my heart Fui(er like one of those (ibratin# beds at 8rank>s 3otel. E(erythin# 2 e(er knew in my life* all the shady stuff 2>d done* it all rose up my throat like bad rawfish and spilled onto the stair ase* a flood of (omitous bile* pineapple and boo0e. 2 heard the pals 2>d left in 4ietnam s ream in the Eun#le. G2 wanna #o home* Bu kL 2 wanna #o homeLH 'nd as 2 wret hed* my whole per eption of the world shook looseCfor standin# before me* ei#ht1foot hi#h* #larin# and barin# lon# halky fan#s* was the honest to God* no bullshit* )olf 3an. !ark fur hea(ed o(er ripplin# mus le and teeth #nashed

like a motori0ed wheat reaper. So* 2 said the first thin# that lit up the dusty* old bulb in my mind: GShit. 9n. 3e.H Jeepin> ool was out the door when you>re about to be mauled by the beastly hound of Satan himself. 2 do(e into the shitter* slammed it shut and prayed. The monster on the other side s rat hed and howled. "laws s ree hed a#ainst the wood* ar(in# away my san tuary. 2 bra ed myself* narrowly dod#in# the hairy fists hammerin# throu#h the wood like it was wa6 paper. 2 heard myself sFueal too* like that peanut1bladdered Girl S out. 2 was a dead man walkin#. 2 knew the s ore. Goddamn )erewol(es. 7ou ne(er think it>ll happen to you. Barkin# and snarlin#* 2 wat hed helplessly as the bloody mu00le e6ploded throu#h the door like an a6e head. Rabid. 8rothin#. To think 2 went out of my way to brin# Jerry his insuran e poli y. -ow this fu ked up @ondoner was #oin# to slurp my intestines throu#h my own asshole like so mu h spa#hetti. 9r worse yet* lea(e me ali(e with the urse. G8u kLH 2>d haunt the #reater 3ississippi area* eatin> on inno ent folks. Bum #i#* if you ask me. 2 tried keepin# the door from swin#in# open and kno kin# me throu#h the hole in the floor. 2t was only one story up* but if 2 twisted my ankle* 2>d be do# food. 5ad to rea h the "har#er. Burn rubber. But the stink of the werewolf>s maw surrounded me and a #ore matted snout snapped fero iously* fetid teeth la kin# to#ether. The howlin# beast homped the air* ra kin> like a bear trap* in hes from my fa e. Then suddenly* in the most surprisin# manner ima#inable* the doorbell ran#. )olfie pulled his snout from the door and stompin# feet and laws s rambled down the hall. Silen e. The doorbell ran# a#ain. 5uh* damn thin# was workin> fine for that poor s hmu k. 8i#ures. !in# don#. G5elloDH ' woman>s (oi e. !amn Southern hospitality. The sweet thin# probably brou#ht a tray of ookies for her new nei#hbor. Say what you may* but 2 wouldn>t trade a #ood home1style mama for all the salt in the sea. G3y name>s Sally. 8rom ne6t door. 2 #ot some ookies to wel ome you into the nei#hborhood.H G!amn it* lady* #et the hell outta !od#e.H 8ear for my immortal soul kept me whisperin# like a kid swappin> #ossip in Sunday s hool. GThey>re ho olate hip. 2 an ome ba k later if you>re busy.H -osey Southern mama>s always in other people>s businessL

3y brain was a frei#ht train. 2 had to do somethin#. )erewol(es aren>t a dis riminatin# bun hB they kill anybody* e(en sweet old ladies. So* 2 shouted from the hole* GIh* 2>m kinda busy ri#ht now* lady. 2>(e #ot some unpa kin# stillLH 9kay* you think she>d buy that. Ri#htD GBut you>(e been mo(ed in for weeks. @et yourself rela6 a bit*H she replied. GIh* -oL -ow>s not a #oodCLH Before 2 finished there she was* standin# beneath the hole in the eilin#. 'nd she damn well took my breath away. G7ou>re SallyDH 2 ould hardly belie(e it. Bla k1eye #irl with the beef akeL G)el ome to 4erney* 3ississippiLH 5er pouty lips were aramel and her waftin# perfume made my musta he shi(er. There was a looker. The definition of fo6y. G@isten to meCLH The monstrous howl boomed. Terror painted Sally>s fa e and the ookie tray lattered on the floor. The wolf skulked out of si#ht* but his sten h made it up throu#h the linoleum hole. She s reamed* fallin# ba kwards o(er the ou h. The werewolf approa hed* dark furry hind le#s liftin# the enormous bulk* its toenails li kin# a#ainst the hardwood floor as it strode. GSally* baby. Girl of my dreams.H 3y breath ran old. Then 2 stood up* #ripped the old toilet and shouted like 2 had a pair: G5ey JerryL 5eads up* hombreLH 2 lifted with my le#s and hea(ed the se(enty pound bowl up and out. The por elain proEe tile ro keted down onto the wolf>s ba k* rashin# and shatterin# into an e6plosion of bowl fra#ments and white powdery shards. The beast yelped and tried risin# slowly* but ollapsed a#ain. 2>d bou#ht some time. 2 hurried downstairs* ryin#: GSallyL SallyLH The monster stirred* dra##in# itself a ross the floor like a wino. G"ome on* baby. 3o(e it while he>s stunnedLH She was out like a li#ht so 2 arried her to the "har#er. 2 #rabbed her by that ute little waist* no time for ourtesy* and lifted her ri#ht up o(er my head. Jerry>s hairy blur stirred amidst the por elain rubble and Sally woke up s reamin# and ki kin# her le#s. 5er #reen dress flun# ri#ht up o(er my eyes and my feet ouldn>t keep up with my head. 2 spilled* headfirst into the door with a thud. ' #odforsaken* #uttural hiss ra kled like foldin# tinfoil. Sally* she>s hootin# and hollerin#* ki kin> me ri#ht in the Eaw. 2 flipped up her dress and

there old wolfie rou hed* blo kin# the only e6it. 2t roared* spittin# putrid phle#m that stu k to my fa e like too mu h sha(in# ream. 2 spit ba k* snat hed a de orati(e dish* and lo ked him ri#ht in the kisser. !ude* he was pissed. 5e howled and batted me with his paw. So* 2 hit him a#ain and a#ain* then darted up the stairs like a damn trape0e artist balan in# on a wire. G?uite sFuirmin#LH 2 shouted with my head wed#ed up Sally>s buns. Jerry withdrew like do# #ettin> the skunk. G8or the lo(e of "o hise* shut up will yaLDH 2 felt like 2 was ba k in Sai#on where Eust about e(eryone you know is shoutin# obs enities at you. 7our leather fa ed "9* your doped up pals* the fanati al enemy* and Eust about e(ery lo al tryin> to sell you ounterfeit @e(is. 2 remembered the heat too* Eun#le humidity. The meat stink. !amn* that 5ellhound needed some Jui y 8ruit. G!o somethin#L 5e>s omin> up the stairs*H Sally s reamed a#ain* ki kin> wildly at the approa hin# behemoth. GGet in the rawl spa eLH 2 turned my head and spotted a monkey wren h. 2 went for it. )olfie beat me to it. 2 felt the e(enin# #ales from outside blow the plasti drapes like #hostsC that bi# dark blur* paradin# throu#h peelin# rooms. 2t really was a half1assed paint Eob in there. -o time for ritiFuesCa werewolf stalked me. 3aybe 2>d #et lu ky* 2>d at h it off #uard. )ould ha(e helped with Sally>s beef1 ake last ni#ht. !amn she had a fine ass. Shit man* there she was hidin# like a sFuirrel in a tree. 2 ould marry a woman like thatB 2 ould settle down and start o(er. 3ake up for thin#s. G7ou know* you>re sure pretty. 7ou and that feller from last ni#htD 7>all serious orDH G)hatLDH Sally e6ploded* fa e bun hed as a atfish. The wolf poun ed* #rowlin# like a hainsaw. 2 tripped ba kwards o(er the paint sprayer* ri#ht into the oiled nest of ables. Shit* 2 thou#ht* 'm 2 min ed meatD 9r am 2 the heroD Jerry>s pompous* British #i##le e hoed from his wolfen maw. People>d been lau#hin> at me my whole damn life. 2 weren>t about to let a werewolf do it too. Grippin# the hrome sprayer* 2 let Jerry ha(e it. Green wood sealant shot tinted* wa6y #oop ri#ht into his eyes. 2t bellowed* lawin# at the soakin# fluid and #rime. "ou#hin#* snortin#* sniffin#* howlin#* the werewolf fin#ered its peepers and dry hea(ed. 8u ker was si k and blind. GGet away from itLH Sally tu##ed my ollar so hard it ripped halfway to my bellybutton.

2 took her hand and the two of us do(e like syn hroni0ed swimmers into the rawl spa e. 9ur hearts pumped fier ely* hers lose to mine. Jerry ra#ed* smashin# two by fours and tool kits. )e na(i#ated the inner walls* sFuee0in# throu#h pat hy openin#s of torn up petunia pattern wallpaper. @ooked like we was in the house>s rib a#e. Blurs of fur and teeth passed us* in and out of si#ht* while ruel nails #rabbed throu#h ra ks in the drywall. G?ui k* down the plumbin#.H 2 lowered Sally down the rooked tree of opper pipin#. Slippery* #reen metal rattled as she mo(ed. G)e>ll #et underneath the floor. 2t>s too bi# to follow us.H 9(er my shoulder* hot sali(a spilled onto my bare ne k. Sally was almost down. 2 spied the kit hen throu#h a tiny drill hole. G2>m almost there*H Sally whispered. 4oi e mousy and sweet* kind of (oi e you>d e6pe t from one of Santa>s el(es. 2>d ha(e bet a nut she ould sin# too. G9h my GodLH GTh> hell is it nowD Go* #irlLH She stopped up the es ape and 2 weren>t ready for another #o at wolfie. 2 mean* 2>m tou#h* babe. But 2 ain>t no 5er ules. Sally s reamed as her feet lattered onto the #round beneath us. E6aminin# the situation* 2 saw somethin# 2 hadn>t seen in a lon#* lon# time. The dead. 'nd man oh man* that fu ker was dead. The orpse must>(e been one of the rew workin> on the house. 5e was little more than a man#led heap of red soaked sti ks wearin# a hard hat. 9ne eye sFuinted in the dire tion of the splattered mess as if su##estin# he>d #otten somethin# on his boots. 5e sure did* about ei#ht pounds of small intestine. 2n A-am you>d run into poor s hmu ks like that* all hewed up and spit out by The 3anCdidn>t matter if it was 5o "hi 3inh or the suits ba k home. 5ell* we was Eust kids* man. Bum #i# for 'meri a>s sons. 'nd e(en after all of it: the fi#htin>* the dyin>C nothin# was worse than #ettin# off that plane. -o mar hin# band* no fla#* Eust a forest of pi ket si#ns allin> me a Gbaby killer.H Th> fu k did those flower fu kin> hemp tokers know* anywayD Just a bun h of apple pie ommunists who knew as mu h about real ombat as they did about their lubed up pe kers. )hat did they knowD 2 was in Sai#on* man. But then a#ain* we was all Eust kids. GThe ontra tor don>t look too #ood.H 2 slid down the last pipe. Sally snat hed me up like a teddy bear. She smelled like a pea h obbler mi6ed with hot se6 and o onut. G2t>s alri#ht* #irl.H 2 briefly smelled her hair. G5e looks like a human pi00a.H

Sally pun hed me ri#ht in the #ut. G"reepLH G5eyL Tou#h ro ks* babe. 2 Eust tell it how it is. 'in>t nothin> we an do for him now. 7ou>re a real fire ra ker ain>t yaDH 2 put the mo(es on her a#ain. G7ou>re si k. 8reakin> redne k per(ertLH 2t appeared 2>d pushed a sensiti(e button. But hell* 2 was a man of the world* not some ba kwoods hi k from Deliverance. 2 lo(ed stuff like 2talian ar hite ture* 4ietnamese food* e(en 8ren h musi Cthou#h 2>ll ar#ue that Johnny "ash was the #reatest that e(er li(ed. G2 Eust bailed you out of a heap of trouble* su#ar. @east you ould do is show some outh* know what 2 mean* babeDH G2>m not the one tryin# to #et busy on a orpse.H G2t>s alled roman e* dollL )ho e(er said anythin# about #ettin# busyD -ow* 2 think 2 deser(e some #ratitudeLH 2t wasn>t enou#h to be stalked by an ei#ht1foot* man1eatin>* spawn from tenth flippin> ir le of 5ell. Sally was pissed and frankly* 2>d ha(e rather dealt with the werewolf. GEnou#h* enou#h. 2 an>t handle this.H Sally rept throu#h the basement* or sub basement* or where(er we were. )alls of mud and mislaid plywood sta ked the shabby walls. @ooked like a half1assed ata omb. G7ou see thatDH She shi(ered. 3y li#hter sparked at the ed#e of the #i#anti #opher hole. Thousands of white roots tan#led from the loddy dirt* wo(en like si kly strin# throu#h the lay and sediment. !eep as a well* my (oi e e hoed. GShould we take a lookDH Puffs of warm air flooded from the hole. 8oul* fetid stink permeated like hot* summer trash. !amn thin# smelled like an ass oyster omelet. G-o way* you>re fri kin> ra0y. )e>re safe here.H She #rabbed the li#hter. G2 don>t know if it o urred to you* but that pile of #uts o(er there didn>t Eust spontaneously ombust.H She dry hea(ed. G@ook* 2 used to be a tunnel rat. 2>ll Eust take a look. Probably Eust a #eothermal well.H G)ait*H she autioned* battin# those pretty* blue eyes. G2t>s okay* babe. 2>m Bu ky !ennis* 2>(e seen it all.H 2f only 2 had. Sure 2>d been a tunnel rat. 2>d killed a man in one of Aem. -othin# an prepare you for takin# another man>s life in the belly of the earth. Stran#e thin# was* when our eyes lo ked* #litterin# in the dim G.2. li#htCfelt

like we was kids di##in>* playin> pretend1like e6plorers at the enter in the world. 2 hardly heard the shots. But 2 felt the #ush of life spill o(er my forearms. Just two kids in a holeCone dead* one ali(e. Sally eyed me. G2>m #oin#*H 2 #rasped the roots and shimmied at a stran#e an#le* ba k pressed into the firm earth. G2 think it>s widenin#.H The roots held* ypress for sure. Them were tou#h ass trees* man. They>ll hold firm in a hurri ane. 2 swun# lower like a musta hioed oran#utan and mana#ed to di# my heels into the mud pretty #ood. G2>m there*H 2 hooted* des endin# onto a soft platform below. "reepy rawlies of e(ery sort slithered and skittered beneath my boots. )orms were ool. 5elp thin#s #row* know what 2 meanD But beetles and spiders and shitD 5ell no* babe. 2 tried keepin# ool* but 2 shriekedCthen immediately o(ered my own mouth. )hat would Sally think if 2 ouldn>t kill a spider in the tub on e we were marriedD 7ou knowD Shit* there 2 was #ettin# ahead of myself a#ain. That>s how mistakes are made. 7ou think somethin# is one way but its really another. G)hat a bit hLH Suddenly* 2 lost my footin#. )orse. The #round #a(e out. GShit1pie. 3other CLH 2 free1fell twenty yards then B'3L Tree bran h. Thin# au#ht me ri#ht in the twins. Good thin# 2 fro0e some Ei00 in AN:. "ollapsin# into a heap of torn roots and flattened bu#s* 2 stret hed my ne k. 3y nuts hurt but 2 was ali(e. 2 sat there a spell* whee0in# like an old hound* #rippin# the muddy walls* o(ered in mu k and mold. GBu kyDH Sally alled from abo(e. G7ou okayDH GTits*H 2 said* Eust Fuiet enou#h for her not to hear. G)here are youDH G"hina* hunL )e made it.H 2 swear on my #randpappy>s #ra(e* 2 heard her smirk. 3usky* subterranean #loom #lowed like marsh #as and skeletons leaned in e(ery orner like dis arded umbrellas. Some of the fresher orpses had hollowed out brainpans* where makeshift andles of fat and sinew burned dimly amidst the shadows. 2>d s ar ely seen worse. S ar ely. 2 stared up the hole. GSafe to ome down. But it ain>t pretty* okayD Think you an handle thatDH 2>d hardly noti ed the rotten smell of turned meat. Empty husks of men and mounds of Ei##lin# flesh laid out on a writhin# bed of ma##ots* bubblin# with rot. Shakin#* Sally slid to me. 5er mouth a#ape* ton#ue on(ulsin#* she eyed the #rinnin# skulls

and smokin# human tor hes. She wret hed into her fists* ralphin# tan#erine hunks onto my sli k* 2talian boots. GSea(er set up shop. 'in>t nobody safe.H 2 nud#ed a dried up orpse and his limbs ra ked off. Rea hin# throu#h the beds of ma##ots* 2 re o#ni0ed the bastard>s #lum smileCBarney the pi00a #uy. 5im for sure. -o bones about it. 3e plus forty pounds. GJerry>s huntin>. 4a ation home my ass.H Barney>s #rin was painted up on that dish in the kit hen. G)ho is itDH GSome #uy 2 knew*H 2 said* half aware of anythin#. GThey>re all trophies* seeD 2 knew that fruity* spande6 sin#le1suit was trouble. G)hat do we do nowDH Sally>s hand lasped mine. She was soft fra#rent as flower petals* e(en o(er her (omit breath. 8resh perfume* the kind a youn#er woman wears* lin#ered in the stale air. G)e make way throu#h there.H Effortlessly* 2 lifted a smolderin# skull from its shoulders. The #rim lantern shone bri#htly* e(en in the murk. ' narrow portal wo(e into what looked like a mineshaft* thou#h there>d been no minin# in 4erney to my knowled#e sin e the "i(il )ar. GToo bad we ain>t #ot a parrot.H G7ou mean a anaryDH Sally Fueried. GShit* #irlL ' bird. 2 don>t knowCis that what they usedDH 2 stepped forwards* sFuishin# into the ti#ht passa#e. G8or what e6a tlyDH Sally asked* eyein# the wri##lin# hal(es of worms in the eilin#. Bubblin# flesh sloshed onto my fin#ers. G!amnitLH 2 ried* G5onestly* 2 ain>t e(en sure 2 know what they used the birds for.H GSmooth mo(e* buddy*H she hortled. GBu ky. -ame>s Bu ky.H 8ifty feet further and still no si#n of any e6it* the skeletal lanterns lead the way. G5ow lon# these thin#s burn you think. 2 mean* half these areC.H ' darkly hulk shifted in the shadows in front of us. The hea(y footprints and ra klin# snaps of breakin# rib a#es rattled and e hoed towards us. GGet ba k up the hole*H 2 said Fuietly* afraid of my own words. The werewolf straddled the pile of skeletons* sali(atin# o(er one of the lamps until the splatter of its #ory maw stamped out the flames. The tattered* yellow Eumpsuit beamed blood1red in the failin# li#ht.

Trippin# o(er a heap of moldy rope* 2 busted my lip. GBu kyLH Sally pulled me from the skatter of bones. Tyin# one* 2 flun# it o(er my head like a owpoke>s lasso and hurled it up the hole. 2 boosted Sally>s toosh up the rope and s urried behind her like a fri#htened spider up a web. G"limbLH The wolf lawed at the earthen wall* di##in# roots out and s atterin# bu#s onto their ba ks. 8e(erish eyes bubbled with blood and pier ed the darkness like !e(il>s hi#h beams. -othin# but his eyes were (isible below in the hollow earth. 9(er the ed#e* 2 ki ked ba kwards and stamped my hea(y heel on to its urled fin#ers. But his fin#ers were damn tou#h. Grippin# my foot* the beast rose from the hole* #iant head swi(elin#. 2 shifted my wei#ht and ki ked with my free foot* kno kin> a fan# from his lower Eaw. Jerry seethed. G"ut the ropeLH 2 yelled* fishin> for my #randdaddy>s po ket knife. G"ut the damn ropeLH Sally went for it* ar(in# lean throu#h the rotten* slime1ridden hemp. G"ri ket>s a sport for pussiesLH The se(ered line slid throu#h my le#s faster than a dra# ar and Jerry howled as he tumbled into the deep of the pit. G2 am up to my hairy ass in bad times* babe.H Sally nodded* sFuee0in# ba k throu#h the reakin#* leakin# opper forest. The #roanin# water pipes made for an uneasy trek throu#h the bowels of the old house* dred#in# throu#h mud and misbe#otten entrails. G3y "har#er>s not thirty feet away. )hen 2 #i(e you a whistle* you #it Smokey and the Bandit ri#ht on out of here. )e sFuareDH G!on>t you know anythin#D That thin#>ll run us down. 5e>s too fast.H Sally was full of all sorts of useful information. G)e>ll ha(e to wait out the full moon. The urse ends when the sun omes up.H G@ook* 2 already knew that*H 2 said. GE(erybody knows the urse #oes ')9@ at dawn. But we ain>t #onna make it to sun up* #ot itD So run that pretty ass* fast as you an.H GThis is #ra(e stuff* Buddy. 3y #randmama was a 5atian 4oodoo wit h and sheC.H G@ook here* tootsie* first and foremost* if you all me Buddy one more timeD 2>m #onnaC.H G7ou>re #onna what* tou#h #uyDH She pursed her lips and thumped her foot into the mu k. G8irst of all* th> name>s Bu ky. Bu ky Solomon !ennis. 'nd se ondly* 2>(e seen enou#h

mo(ies to know damn well what we>re dealin> with. Jerry>s a #oddamned werewolf from @ondon* on a (a ation retreat from his busy Eob as hellhound a ross the pond. Probably heard there was plenty of #ood eats in 4erney* 3ississippi and de ided to arry the urse o(er seas. The !e(il himself pumps in that fu ker>s (eins. 5e>s e(en olle tin> their portraits on the wallC like some fu ked up* Satani arts and rafts timeLH 2 was riled up. 'nd damn that #irl had a body on her. GTake our han es in this deathtrap Atil mornin> or #et the hell out of !od#eD 8rankly* 2 don>t #i(e a damn. 2>m (otin# for the !od#e.H ' woman needs a man* know what 2 mean. -ut up and wa# them pea hes. 2 weren>t some deadbeat #ood ol> boy* bubba fu kin> redne k. 2 had heart. Sally tied her hair ba k with a (iolet s run hie. G'lri#ht* fair enou#h.H G!amn ri#ht. -ow* if you ha(e any li#ht bulbs o(er your head* feel free to di(ul#e.H )e Fuieted. 2n moments of risis you need time to let it sink in. !on>t rush it or you>ll blow it. 2 always think ba k on a #uy 2 knew* !enny Phelps* Brooklyn boy in A-amB he sat throu#h three tours. Somethin> like ei#ht God forsaken years in The Shit. !enny said it didn>t bother him* all the killin#. 5e went home and spent two years workin> at a wharf in San 8ran is o. )ell* one day he flipped out while pullin> in a rab net* and 2 mean Looney Toons. S reamin> bloody muder in pid#in 4ietnamese* smashin> rusta eans with fists like Ea k hammers. 2t took si6 #uys to alm him down and after that he spent the rest of his days diddlin> himself in a ounty mental ward. Jept thin#s bottled up* didn>t take time to address his needs. Sometimes you>(e #ot to let thin#s out. @et Aem #o. That>s Eust life. Sally wept into the nook of her inner elbow. 2 put my arm around her. G2t>s alri#ht* darlin>*H 2 said. G)e>re #ood. )e>ll hunker down under the li(in# room floor* and keep it real Fuiet like Atil mornin#.H Sally reminded me of the e6. ' lot of times 2 weren>t there for her. 7ou know how it is. Bu ky ne(er was an an#el* no sir. The e6 heated on me twi e* but 2 let it slide* meC2 had my #o around with some fillies in Sai#on* war and all. Really it was the kids that kept us i(il* Atil the new feller rolled in with his German ar. 3innie and 3ay. 3y #irls. 3y #olden beauties. 2 wanted to see Aem #row up* #o to olle#e* make it better than 2 had. )ouldn>t be tou#h. But 2 was two restrainin# orders too many. Too many missed birthdays* too many sloppy ni#hts at the Fuarry with @loyd and some of the others. Boo0in> and bakin>* ruisin> and shakin>. )eren>t no life for two little #als.

GBu kyDH Sally Fuestioned* her pouty lips pu kered. G're you okDH 2 pu kered too* ready to plant one on my sweet Sally. G7ou look really familiar. 5a(e we metDH She sFuinted. Shit on me* 2 thou#ht. G7ou don>t freakin> rememberDH 5ow does a woman for#et somethin# like thatD 2 was all o(er her. !ebonair* like !on John. Sli k as Johnny "ash* hisself. !ude* who ould for#et a Asta he like mineD G!o you work at that pi00a pla e off of "osta and JorbDH G"hrist* lady.H G7ou know* that pla e* parallel to Pearse and "unnin#ham* ri#ht ne6t to Blo k 5ere>s Typewriter RepairDH G5ell noLH 2 barked. G2>m the at from last ni#ht. Bu kyL 7our stupid ass beef1 ake thrashed me after 2 asked you to dan e. 7ou don>t remember thatDH G9h*H she muttered. GThat was youDH 7eah. 8u kin> women* 2 thou#ht. GBeef1 akeD 2 didn>t e(en know the #uy. Golly* you alri#htDH 2 pointed to my bla k and blue eye and said* G2 Eust want to tell ya* he #ot some lu ky shots in. 'nd 2>d had a few too many. 9kayD 7ou know how it is.H G5uh* sure didn>t look that way.H She shru##ed and sat down* pullin# her knees up to her hest. )e sat in the dark a lon# while half uddlin#* half listenin# for the terrifyin#* motions of the prowlin# beast. ?uiet. E6 itin#. Pretty #irl in the mud. )olfman on the prowl. @ife throws you ur(e balls* you knowD Some times you swin# and miss* sometimes well* you know: 5omerun. G2 wanted to dan e with you*H she said* almost inaudible. G)hat was thatDH 2>d heard her Eust fine. G2 wanted to dan e. 7ou seemed like a ni e #uy* a hau(inist per(* but ni e.H ' little smile urled her lips* her white teeth ontrastin# a#ainst her dark skin. 5er short hair>d been dyed reddish* looked pretty throu#h the #lowin# beams of flores ent li#ht tri klin# throu#h the ra ks in the floor. 2t all felt a little like amp. G3aybe ome sun up* we ould #et some e##s or somethin#DH 2 asked her out* my innards in knots. G7ou think it>s #oneDH she asked* lookin# up throu#h the floorboards.

G7eah* probably ran off into the woods. That or eatin# one of the nei#hbors. 7ou an ne(er fi#ure what they>ll do after the sa(a#e takes o(er. -o sirey1bob* not e(enC*H 2 talked her ear off when suddenly* in the near distan e* the rusty si#h of old nails shattered the moment. Before 2 ould say: G'ss1monkey1tuna1fu kLH li#ht from the li(in# room flooded the rawlspa e. The werewolf skulked o(er the openin#* fist fulls of spittle and hunky red doused me like a bu ket of hum. 2 rolled left* Sally ri#ht. G3o(e* stay beneath the floorboards.H 9ne of the ontra tors must ha(e had the same idea. Thou#ht he>d be safe. But there 2 was* elbow to elbow with a slew of hewed up workers* sinkin# in the slud#e. )ish 2 had my rifle* 2 thou#ht. @ike hairy sha kles* wolfie>s fin#ers lat hed my ankles and pulled me with stren#th inhuman. GJesus "hristLH 2 s reamed. 5e fished me like a #rub in a rotten lo#* holdin# me upside1 down* pantin# dead breath into my fa e. Sally turned around and #rabbed my arm. Good #irl. She pulled. But damn* Jerry was one stron# su ker. Sally tossed o(er the ontra tor>s hardhat. 2 au#ht it and went haywire* lobberin# the wolf>s head: ki kin>* hootin>* hollerin> like a mental patient. 2 noti ed #listenin#* #reen wood sealant mattin# up his oarse* bla k whiskers. Sali(a dripped from its mouth like a leaky fau et. 2 rea hed for my li#hter and stru k that little metal wheel. GR9)@LH Jerry howled as sparks lit* spreadin# o(er his fa e* sin#in# and smolderin# his unholy beard. The werewolf>s hand #ripped me by the belt bu kle* hurlin# me into the kit hen like he were tossin> a hew toy. 2 e(en sFueaked when 2 landed. 2 tasted more wet* hot blood streamin# down my musta he. 3y salty life leaked. 2 was #oin# downtown and fast too. Jerry pummeled me a#ain* ra0ors sli in# throu#h me* spinnin# me like a dradle into the refri#erator. @ife as 2>d known it slowed down to a baby>s rawl. 'nd 2 peered at the approa hin# shadow throu#h blurry eyes. The #reat beast s owled* teeth #nashin#* #nawin#. "rooked fan#s hattered as that bla k ton#ue writhed like a pit (iper. 5isses* snarls: but abo(e all Ca low and mournful (oi e alled to me. 2 knew it too. Johnny "ash. GBury me not on the lone prairie*H he said. Seemed to me we>re put on this earth for one reason. Generally it>s a damn #ood one. Sure* we make our own destiny. @ord knows 2 had. But who>s to say that all roads don>t lead to the

same pla e. 5ell* we all end up worm feasts somehow* somewhere. So* 2 stood up. The monster>s eyelids narrowed. 2 adEusted my Eunk* ho ked a bo#ey* and len hed my fist. G5ey* JerryD @et>s roll* hombre.H The wolf>s sha##y nape sprun# like a toothed Ea k1in1the1bo6. 5e barked ra(enously* snappin# and lawin#. Jerry>s bestial un ir um ised wolf di k swun# like a furry pendulum between his powerful haun hes. GBrin# it you ass u#ly* Euro1trahsin>* !ut h "obraLH 2 stood my #round* urled my fist and swun# ri#ht for his pea hes. 2 au#ht Aem* twisted* and brou#ht down the thunder. Jerry bellowed* eyes rolled ba k and white as milk. 5is ton#ue slithered like a eel on a hotplate. But 2 held on* pin hin# his hairy stones like an iron (i e. 2 Eui ed Aem* bub* sFuee0in> those ly anthropi testi les like a ouple of lemons. The werewolf roared* shutterin#* and lashin# out with e(ery demoni limb. 5e tore up the pla e* smashin# the sink and rakin# his laws o(er the din#y wallpaper. Jerry tore a swin#in# handelier from the eilin#* swin#in# it like a flail* until 2 finally let #o and the wolf ollapsed into a pile of rubble* pantin# and yelpin#. Smoke rose* swirlin# like a fatty dra#* urlin# into a loud alon# the eilin#. 8u ker>s Eue(os was on fire* bud. )olfie whimpered. 3y hand steamed and sweltered. G4erney 5i#h 8ootball &=<;.H Solid sil(er with my mama>s birthstone. 2 kissed the rin# and swear she twinkled like 3ississippi sunshine. Inholy fury shook hips of paint and sawdust off of the walls of the remodel. Jerry wasn>t out* Eust ornery and pissed. -auseous too apparently* he took two steps and wret hed !e(il>s bile onto the floor. The rush of hot* fin#er filled (omit flooded o(er my ankles. 5e splashed towards me on all fours. GToroLH 2 san# with my bloody #rin. Jerry har#ed* dishes shook off the walls and all those painted fa es shattered. The windows ra ked* pipes twisted* spurtin# water from beneath the floor. 'nd that ran id meat stink bubbled up from the #round like a ba ked up #arba#e disposal from 5ell. )e>re talkin> foul. )e ollided like Eoustin# kni#hts* ea h blarin# our war ries* wailin#* (iolent. 3y fist onne ted si00lin#* s or hin# a pat h of fur o(er the wolf>s kidney. Three more blows to his ribs and #ut* and a smokin# Eab to his Eaw.

)adin# thou#h liFuid (ileness* we slipped and slid like lubed up @u ys in a skin fli k. Jerry #ripped me ti#ht and plowed me into the #ranite ounter1top* my head brea hin# a sta k of so##y* ereal bo6es and tins of sardines. 2 wobbled to my feet* peekin# throu#h swollen eyes. The wolf rose its broad shoulders* brandishin# tooth and law* hea(in# and steamin#. G'lri#ht*H 2 said* raisin# my fists and swayin> like a title fi#hter. G@ast tan#o* Jerry. "ome on now* #et a taste.H )ith demoni sa(a#ery* Jerry atta ked with an embra e of fan#s. 3y head burst throu#h the abinets and a rain of @u ky "harms lod#ed into my mutton hops. Rea hin# for a but her knife* 2 fin#ered desperately* stret hin# until 2 lut hed somethin# loosely into my rin# hand. GJa kson(ille "anned Spa#hetti*H 2 read aloud. @ow* hollow lau#hter betrayed the presen e of a man behind the beast>s dread (isa#e. GThink that>s funnyDH 2 shouted* smashin# the an o(er his head. 'nd 2 didn>t stop. 2 smashed and smashed his fa e until he spit sharp teeth. G8u k. 7ouLH Bashin#* pun hin#* rushin#* ra kin#* demon>s blood spilled from a so##y skull* sFuirtin# up my nose* into my musta he* o(er my hest. Splinters of bone and brain mul hed to#ether with short strand pasta and #ooey marinara sau e until nothin# but red soaked spande6 and a furry* lumped stain remained. Jerry>s le#s twit hed in the fo# of holy smite. 3y rin# #lowed red hot* but didn>t burn me. Sally peeked from the rawlspa e* hair dishe(eled* makeup runnin#Ca #enuine Southern ra#amuffin. Jerry>s head and throat #ur#led up fleshy pulp* oo0in# like a busted sprinkler head. G2s itDH Sally hoked. G7eah* su#ar. 5e>s toast.H 2 knelt forwards* fishin# hips of skull from my musta he Sally stepped o(er the #ory hulk* leaned o(er and helped me to my feet. 2 tried to a t tou#h* but #roaned. She held me lose* holdin# my hand. The birds hirped a sweet summer melody outside as the sun ame up o(er the willow trees. 'nd she laid me near the "har#er. Sally>s tears dappled my hest as softly as the mornin# li#ht. Ea h tear washin# lean the stain. 2 spit pinkCfluid in my lun#s. "an>t take hits like that without pokin> a (ital. G2 don>t mean to be a per(ertCbut you look damn fine with that #reen dress lun# o(er that

little fi#ure of yours.H She lau#hed* but 2 ould tell she wasn>t happy. G2 ha(e a mind to ask you to dan e*H 2 ou#hed. G2>d lo(e to*H she replied. )e urled up to#ether on the hood of my "har#er* wat hin# the sun peer out o(er the willow trees. Tiny diamonds of li#ht #littered throu#h the lush #reen of the weepin# lea(es as they were tossed by the wind. 8rom afar we heard sparrows. GBu kyDH 2 brushed a silky wa(e of hair behind her ear* ute ear too. G7eah* 2>m here*H 2 said* Fuiet1 like. 3y heart Fuaked. )e drew loser and my pants shrank as our lips met tenderly. 3y whole world wised up. Bam* babe. That enli#htenin#* swift ki k to the head* that heart1pumpin# reminder of Eust why we stri(e to lean up our li(esCit all sma ked me like a paddle. Sure* y>all #et a bum wrap here or there. But bum wraps lead to unwrappin> the #ifts to ome. So* 2 kissed Sally hard and she kissed me. 9ur bodies intertwined* heartbeats bo6ed. 'nd with a swift tu#* 2 peeled off her top. *****

"OODOO #I$ %D HONKY TONK

O & 2>d been in that mu##y ass* 3ississippi bus for two hours. The Eohn in ba k sloshed like a bowl of de(il>s lam howder* and bubbled up somethin> un#odly onto the puke1stained bus arpetin#. @ooked like tuna melt* shit1latke. 2 held my breath as lon# as 2 ould* but 2 kept #ettin> distra ted. ' fre kle1fa ed* retarded #uy sun# with spit bubbles dribblin> out of his mouth. G5eartbreak 5otel.H -i e enou#h* fellerCbut* damn he but hered The Jin#. Skeeters bu00ed e(erywhi hwhere* su kin> on my ass. 'nd that fat dri(er didn>t do nothin> but homp his Bi# Red and lau#h at the retard for fifty odd miles. Jee0* man. Some people ain>t #ot no ta t* you know what 2 meanD That saidCit was the saddest automobile trip 2>d e(er taken. 'nd to think that was my first e6perien e as a free man. 8irst of all* 2>d be better off with my ><= "har#er out of the Poli e impound. But 2 didn>t

ha(e twel(e #rand to #et it out a#ain. 3aybe if 2 asked God* real sweet1like* Johnny "ash>ll swin# by in his sterlin# "addy and spot me a do0en BenEamins. 7eah. 'nyway* let me sFuare thin#s. 'ny of y>all that know me* know 2 didn>t kill no one that didn>t need killin>. That Jerry Sea(er #uyD 5e had it omin#. But that didn>t matter* anyhow. 7es* 2 was free. But 2 still needed broodin# time and still needed a swi# of Ja k !aniels. 5ell* all thin#s said and done* 2 was lu ky no matter whi h way you spelled it. Poli e didn>t ha(e nothin> on me in the end. 2All thank my hi#h s hool rin# for that one. 7ep* they had nothin#. So* bamL Bu ky !ennis walked* that is* after two fu kin> years. The ourt assi#ned me this mousy* little short ake named 3s. !unham. ' ounty parole offi er* she stood four foot hi#h e(en when she wore those u#ly ass* polka dot stilettos. 3i#ht as well stab me with Aem. -o wrinkles on her fa e to speak of* probably A ause she didn>t smileB she had a button nose* ni e thi k lips* but rooked1ass pearly whites. 2 was supposed to meet her for offee that afternoon to talk about my employment options if 2 e(er #ot off the damn bus. Two hours and han#e in the stink bo6* all the way down to "laiborne>s Ri(er 8ront "afP* Eust north of the 4erney "ounty line. 3y ba k a hed* 2 needed a barber* and my knu kles were still swollen from all brawlin# behind1bars. @ot of per(erts* bud. 3ore than you>d think* anyway. 2>m not a bi# #uy* but 2 pa k pun h and #ot forearms like Popeye. E(en so* 2 wasn>t in the slammer two days when the first -a0i1lo(in> fu kwit went after my orn1hole. That said* 2>m pleased to add he ne(er #ot any. 2 leaned his lo k and put the fear of "hrist in him. 2>m Bu ky !. 2 ain>t about to be some nostril flarin#* white power pimp>s hew toy. The bus Eostled us around. 2 twiddled my thumbs* wat hin# the street si#ns han#e: 8irst Street* Se ond* Third* 8ourth. -ot too many folks out. Then a#ain* the humidity lur hed o(er the town like a blimp. The 5indenbur# of sti ky* 3ississippi heat. 'nd heat tends to stir the ra0ies* at least it did in 4erney. 9ne feller in parti ular* homeless feller* he was bundled up for an i e a#e and ro kin# ba k and forth outside this little fortune teller>s shop: 2nanna !u(al>s Tarot. The man radled what 2 hoped was a sleepin# alley at and spoke #ibberish. 2nse t1ridden dreadlo ks hun# from his head like rypt i(y* dan#lin# and swayin# as he ro ked with the still feline. 5e fli ked flies from the at with fin#ers as thin and translu ent as fish bones. The bus brakes s ree hed. 2 sta##ered off* pun hed in the belly by the sti ky Southern air. The homeless feller stared. 2 lit me a menthol* pulled my wet honers out of my ass and handed him one. GSmokeDH

The bum took the i#arette* eyed it for half a moment and popped the whole thin# into his mouth like a sti k of #um. 5e hewed* pettin# the learly dead at. GTake are now*H 2 said* noti in# a nosey lady starin# from her shop window. Bi#* bri#ht eyes rolled with my heels as 2 took ea h step* wat hin# intently throu#h the dereli t portal. The buildin# leaned to one side* with a few steel support #irders (isibly retrofitted to keep the whole thin# from rumblin#. She tapped the window. 2 i#nored her at first* then she tapped a#ain. G7eahDH 2 stopped in the street* blowin# a menthol loud of smoke a#ainst the pane of #lass. G-ot ome from Around here*H she said. G2 an see.H Bells linked when the door opened. ' waft of smolderin# in ense and innamon ame from the shop. G!on>t want a readin> from 2anna !u(alDH G3a>am* no offense. But 2>(e been in 4erney my whole life. 7ou an>t be mu h of a psy hi .H True* 2 thou#ht. See* a man don>t Eust remember the pla e he omes fromChe dreams of home when he>s #one. 'nd bleeds it when he>s hurt. G'in>t no psy hi s here.H 2anna #rabbed my wrist and pulled me throu#h a urtain of beads. G2anna don>t see nothin>. She wat hes.H G3a>am 2 ain>t a stran#er to theseC.H She ut me off. G)e play a #ame.H She hushed me with a short* stubby fin#er. G2>ll read your way.H G3y wayDH 2t wasn>t my first trip to a fortuneteller. 2>d had my palm read a hundred times in A-am. But then a#ain* fortunes out there ame with a hand Eob. G7our fortune* dumby man*H she s olded. G7ou ain>t from Around here* but thinks you is. )e see what the ards say.H 2anna led me into a small* dimly lit room with wallpaper like snakeskin. )e sat down at a ast iron* bistro table without hairs* at the enter of whi h was de orated with a Ear. ' floatin#* #oo#ly1eyed toad stared throu#h a (eil of formaldehyde. G)hat>s your name* stran#er that say he from Around hereDH The woman pro ured a la(ish de k of Tarot ards and shuffled them sli k as a Ri(iera roupier. GSo it>s a Tarot readin#D 5ow mu hDH 2 leaned into my po ket. G"hrist*H 2 said* thumbin# open my wallet.H 2anna slapped my hand. G-o money for dis* stran#er manL 2t ain>t Tarot like you knows it. This is !e(il>s Tarot* boy. Played by all da lesser imps and demons* Around tables of sti ks* deep in the 8allen 9ne>s pit. !is is a spe ial tellin>.H She fanned out the ards and pla ed three fa e

down on the table. 'nd 2>m ertain the formaldehyde bubbled when the first ard tou hed. G-ame* pleaseDH she asked. G'll of it* not Eust some.H GBu ky Solomon !ennis.H 2 stamped my i#arette into my boot with a si00le. G!raw now the first* "ard of the 3ind.H 2anna rubbed her hands to#ether* furiously. 2 saw sweat well in her palms. 2 flipped it* re(ealin# a #oat1like man with se(eral arms* rea hin# for swords. The Roman numeral ei#ht was s rat hed into it. G'n#ry are weDH 2anna #i##led* GThe 'rms of '0a0el says so. 3e thinkin> you be wantin> re(en#e. Just like that ornery s ape#oat from a lon# time ba k.H The woman>s fin#ernails li ked on the iron table. G-ow* flip the Spirit "ard* Bu ky Solomon.H 2 did so* turnin# the se ond ard o(er to re(eal a win#ed toad in a Ear. G@ook familiarDH 2 said* talkin# entirely to the toad on the table. G'h* 2>m learnin> mu h* Bu ky*H 2anna retorted. GThe 8amiliar Bottle keepin> you ooped up* aint itD But we all ha(e your (i es. !on>t we* boyDH 2 lau#hed. G7eah* @ady. !on>t 2 know it.H G@ast ard. 4ery important. 8lip and let>s wat h.H 2anna li ked her lips* rappin# her fin#ernails and rubbin# her hands* e6 ited as a hild. G!estiny "ardL 8lip itL 8lip itLH 5er hea(y rolls wobbled and shook as she shimmied in pla e. The whole thin# was off puttin#. Re(ealin# the last ard* 2anna turned to stone. -o mo(ement* no fin#er li ks* Eust a stupefied stare into the distan e* beyond the ima#e inked onto the ardboard. G)ellDH 2 Fueried* tappin# the ima#e of an an#el holdin# a #olden key. G3ean* 2>ll unlo k opportunities in the futureD 3aybe my parole offi er>ll #et me a EobDH GJey to the 'byss*H she mouthed. G-e(er seen it.H 2anna>s Fui(erin# hand ho(ered abo(e the ard but she wouldn>t tou h it. G'in>t e(en in the de k.H G2ts ri#ht there*H 2 added. G-o* you don>t understand it. Jey to the 'byss ain>t e(en in the de k. 2t don>t ha(e a pla e. 7ou pull it fromKH 2 stood up and relit the bud of my Rainbow menthol. ' url of smoke spun from my fin#ertips and 2 breathed the (apors deep. G5ow mu h 2 owe you* 3a>amDH GShut up with your money* boyL 7ou done pulled a ard from the other side. 7ou ain>t from hereL 7ou #ot a loud. !ark as a spider>s eye. 7ou ain>t from here* no sir.H

G@ady* 2>(e been away a lon# time. But this is home. 2 dream it e(ery ni#ht. 2 bleed it. 4erney>s my sli e of hea(en. 8ar as 2>m on erned* there ain>t a sin#le other pla e on this earth.H The bells Ein#led as 2 left* strollin# down the street to the afP. 3y head hurt* my feet hurt* and alls 2 wanted was a old one and maybe some ribs. O $ 2 hadn>t left the 4erney "ounty line in o(er a de ade. 'fter the wife left* dau#hters too* my lon# bout of bad lu k ended when 2 #ot hired as an insuran e a#ent. So yeah* 2 an think ba k to a of ouple years in the late se(enties when my life weren>t> shit. 'nd by shit 2 mean elephant runs* floodin> the steps of astles made of ow pies. )e>re talkin> hell* dude. 'nyway* that was before the in ident* the killin#. 8irst off* lean slate* honest to #oodness* 2>ll say it twi e: 2 didn>t kill nobody that didn>t need killin>. Jerry Sea(erD )ell* he had it omin#. 'nd e(er sin e* the #odforsaken urse of that man had followed me like a rain loud at a weddin#. Sally wasn>t any help* neither. They took her away too* you know. She did four months in GTitty Blo kH before they let her off. Good beha(ior ain>t too hard to a hie(e on Titty Blo k. @ots of #uards lookin> for a pull or a blow and if you an handle the abuse* they>ll keep you safe and talk real sweet1like at your parole hearin#s. 's for meD )ell* the poli e presented #ood ol> Bu ky with two lon# ones. Sally>d (isit sometimes* pressed her lus ious -ubian bosoms a#ainst the #lass and hea(e. But after a while her (isits sputtered out like an old "he(y. @o(ed her too damn mu h* 2 #uess. Shame too* A ause she was one of the only #als that e(er #ot me. 'nd 2 mean* the real* no1bullshit* dirty* lousy Bu ky !. But hey* tou#h ro ks* babe. Seriously thou#h* her lo(e was de ent and fleetin#C2>ll #et by. "laiborne>s "afP sat on my ri#ht o(erlookin# a small* wobbly pier that harbored shrimp boats and a hundred year old tu#. They>d hu# up ri(er and down into the Gulf* sell their at h o(er on the @ouisiana side too. Good business is my #uess* been #ood rain and better fishin> despite in rease in it. Probably where 2>d end up* shrimpin# or workin# the pier* maybe pa kin> i e. 2t wasn>t #oin# to be Eddie 5erbert>s 2nsuran e* but work was work* know what 2 meanD 'in>t a damn thin# wron# with a man earnin# his #reen. 8eed your family and yourself. )ork hard* honest and Southern. 'nd on SundayD Beer and football. Take a Sabbath* babe. -er(es twit hed in my hest. !unham was one tou#h lady e(en if she was only as tall as a

sa k of taters. 5ad teeth behind those little red lips* not unlike the prose utor. 2 spit in my palm and leaned up the musta he and hops. -eeded some )in hester )a6* but hell* 2>d only been a free man for three hours. 2 passed throu#h the saloon doors. GRibsDH 3s. !unham sat at the bar* fin#ers red with sau e with four empty shot #lasses turned upside1down. 'pparently she hased pork with heap1ass teFuila. G'in>t you on dutyDH 2 pulled up a stool. G9ff the lo k* 3r. !ennis*H she #rumbled* hompin# away. 2 heard the #rind of teeth on bone as she su kled ea h #ristly* pulpy Eoint. GSo* what>s the dealD "ourt said 2 wasn>t supposed to lea(e 4erney. 7et* here 2 am at the line.H 2t was true. Jud#e 5awthorne said it himself: G7ou lea(e this "ounty* boy. 'nd 2>ll ha(e your balls for hood ornaments.H Tou#h #uy* Jud#e 5awthorne. 9ne1le##ed Jorean )ar 4et with a mean lisp and a #ut like a rhino. 2>ll be damned if ouldn>t help but like the son of a bit h. Reminded me of Pa. GRela6* owboy. 7ou>re not workin# the boats. 7ou think 2 want 5awthorne makin> my balls into hood ornamentsDH she beamed. G2 #ot somethin# for you in town. -ot mu h but they don>t ask too many Fuestions at this pla e.H !unham #nawed at the bone* fin#ers stained with hot @ouisiana barbe ue. 2f that wasn>t #ross enou#h* she kept usin# that damn owboy rhetori * you knowD 2 mean shit* man. 2>(e seen a few steers in my day* but 2>(e been li(in# my life on the bayouCnot some silly ass* open ran#e* John )ayne fu kin> a lon# horn on the prairie with a Butline* bullshit. The !uke was a ool at thou#h. G2 take it ain>t a desk EobDH 2 knew it wasn>t. Those days was #one* bud. -o more ties and po ket prote tors for Bu ky !. !unham hortled* pi kin# her teeth. G'fraid not* partner.H G)hat is it thenD Tell me it ain>t fast food. 2>ll sell shoes or pa k rayfish* but 2 won>t slin# Ta o meat.H 2 popped the bottle ap off my brewski and sipped. 7ears sin e 2 had a beer* ain>t a woman out there an satisfy me like that old one did. ASides* beer don>t bit h* moan* lea(e* or take your dau#hters away. GThey need some washers down the road. 2t>s on fifth* Eust passed St. 'nthony>s. Pla e used to be this old museum but a 7ankee named 4in ent @aGuardia mo(ed in and on(erted it to a ar wash: 4in>s )onder )ash*H she trailed off or maybe it was the shot of Ja kie !. G4in>s )onder )ashD 2t>s a damn theme park or whatD They need arnies tooDH 2 tried to be

i(il. G2 bet you a bottle of 3aker>s 2 ould #uess your wei#ht. "hrist* !unham.H G@ook* Bu k. 2 don>t think you killed the Brit. 5e probably #ot drunk and fell into some power tools. But you>re a parolee now. -ot e6a tly an easy hire.H G2>ll remind you 2 was ne(er on(i ted. Bastards a#ed me without re#ard of the law.H 2 hated talkin# about it* made the fillin#s in my teeth bu00. G'h* hell. 7ou don>t know the half of it.H G@ook* 2 don>t really are. -ot my Eob to are. 7ou>re out on #ood beha(ior and it won>t be easy to #et anythin# #oin#. Take what you an.H )ords wouldn>t lea(e my lips. 2 had a ton#ue like a Japanese noodle. 9ne of them bi# ass* flat ones you #et in soup. GGot it* owboyDH She put down the bone and finally started wipin> down that bloody lookin> mouth of hers with those wet towelettes. Shit man* only in the slammer two years and 2 for#ot about fu kin> moist towelettes. GGot itDH !unham repeated* reapplyin# her lipsti k. GSo* 2>m washin> ars thenDH 2 asked. But 2 knew the answer. O : 4in>s )onder )ash was a dry1do ked ri(erboat* one with a #iant water wheel run by a hu##in# diesel motor. 2t sunk on its left side* rumblin# into a heap ement foundation made of rebar pylons and freeway di(iders. The wash itself was a tunnel of o(er1si0ed mops and sprinkler heads* whirrin# une(enly in a shadowy tunnel of suds and stinkin# water. )hen the ars rolled throu#h* they parked Aem beneath a wooden trellis with sprun# planks and antiFue moss. They looked like rooked piano keys. 2 had a i#arette in the waitin# room* e6aminin# din#y photos of fisherman and "i(il )ar boys all pa ked like steers on the de k of the ri(erboat. -one of them wa(ed thou#h. ' tattered bro hure on an old timey sto(e said it used to be a "i(il )ar museum and still had some pri ey trinkets mounted up here and there to brin# in tourists. )orked too. 8rom what 2 ould tell* most of the lientele were (ans with purple (el(et urtains on the insideCthose and )inneba#os. 8olks in olorful silk shirts filed from the museum area* wa(in> "onfederate fla#s and sportin# brass I.S. "a(alry bu kles. Jids with sti ky* pink rimmed mouths pulled fluffs of otton andy from ardboard ones* whiles ornery teens slumped o(er the Gettysbur# pinball ma hine*

pin#in# their way to (i tory. 8our fellers had already lo ked in* business must>(e been #ood for s rubbin# hub aps. Too tired* 2 si#hed and s rat hed my stubbley hin. 3y i#arette butt si00led in an ashtray shaped like a annon. Thin# was funny A ause you stamped your smoke where the annon fuse was. Boom* you knowD G5eyoL Bu k is itDH That was 4in* a sto ky 2talian 7ankee. 'nd 2 mean really 2talian. 5airy as a throw ru# with a "atholi ru ifi6 and 2>ll be damned if he didn>t smell to hi#h hea(en of ri#atoni. 8or sure* babe. Guy definitely had marinara pumpin> throu#h his (eins or somethin#. G7eah* that>s me. 7ou must be 3r. @aGuardia. 8ine pla e. 3ust be o(ered #oodDH Still tryin> to sell insuran e. 4in must>(e had a stellar poli y: water dama#e* fire* hurri ane. 5ell* e(en histori al landmark preser(ation o(era#e. That had to be a thin#* ri#htD G7ou an bet your ass. This pla e is a histori landmark* ya knowDH @aGuardia had eyebrows like aterpillars* in hin# up and down with e(ery word and e6pression 2 stru##led not to stair. G7eahD 5ow>d a #uy like you end up in 4erneyDH G2 traded for it strai#ht up. 2>m lookin> for real estate down here and the ori#inal owner omes to me* he says* you know what he saysD 5e says* AEh* 2 #ot this museum 2>m on(ertin# into a arwash fran hise. 2>m under water. 7ou want itD> 'nd he wants 2 should trade for one of my Eoints up north.H 4in was a motor mouth for ertain. GJointsDH 2 sFueaked. G7ou ne(er heard of 4in ent @aGuardiaD 7ou know* the hardware hainsD 7ou #ot Aem around here. @a Guaria 5ardware. So* he says* AEh* 2>ll #o all in strai#ht up for a hardware store in Ja kson(ille.> 2 says* E5L )hat am 2 a fu kwitDH )hite* foamy spe ks #athered at the orners of his mouth. 2 had the ur#e to wipe them. G5aLH 2 lau#hed. 8elt new to lau#h. G2 know ri#htD SoL 2 says* @ook* 2 ain>t tradin> Ja kson(ille for some arwash in Buttfu k Boonies(ille* ya knowD Those fu kin> s hleps earn me ten #rand a weekLH G"an>t pass that up.H 2 wat hed the other #uys s rub away on this monolithi R4* total behemoth like a damned Eumbo Eet with lipped win#s. 9ne feller in parti ular* a bi# ass bla k #uy* tall as a fla# pole* brawny as a bear with skin as dark as oal* he shimmered in the sunli#ht. ' thi k beard wreathed his fa e and sFuinty eyes #lared up intently throu#h the pane of filthy* sudsy #lass. )heelin# a pallet of polish* he made towards us and remo(in# his tattered Saints

ball ap. 5e re(ealed a deep* tissue s ar on his ri#ht arm. The old wound wrapped like a python from his wrist to shoulder. G2>ll be damned*H 2 stammered* i#norin# 4inny. GThat>s what 2 saidLH ontinued 4in. GBut here 2 am. 5appy as a pi# in shit.H G2s thatDH 2 asked aloud. G@loyd )altersDH GBu ky !ennis* you son of a bit h.H @loyd #rabbed my arm like only a soldier an. That firm* forearm #rip and tu#. GBoss* tell me you>re hirin> this man.H @loyd turned to 4in and slapped his ba k. G2 ha(en>t seen him sin eKH G"amp Pendleton*H 2 said. GBud* you>re lookin> fineL Just fineLH )alters was my best mate in basi * followed me half way Around the #lobe to the stankiest* wettest* darkest 4.". rawlin> Eun#les in the whole damned world. Spoke at my weddin# in 8ayette(ille* #odfather to my beauties. 5ell* if 2 hadn>t ha(e had dau#hters* thou#h 2 lo(e Aem dearly* @loyd would be the name of my son. G5ow the hell are youDH G7ou see my smilin> don>t youDH @loyd kno ked my shoulder. 4inny #rinned* unwrappin# a andy bar. G@ooks like we #ot a #uy* ehD 5e>s ool wit you* he>s ool wit me.H 3r. @aGuardia patted me on the ba k and 2 was made* babe. G-ow don>t fu k it up or 2>ll bury you at )ri#ley>s* api heDH G"an ount on me* sir.H 2 saluted. @loyd unfolded his time ard and pun hed out on a se(enty year old* sil(er ti ker ma hine. G5ot damnLH )alters lattered and ontinued with a hooot* G5ooah. 2>ll show you around* let>s sna# a frosty in the parlor. 7ou #ot a pla e you>re stayin> atDH @loyd led me down a ri kety stair ase with hipped white paint and rooked pi ture frames. 3usta hioed "i(il )ar #enerals* Inion and "onfederate* eyed ea h other ri#idly throu#h a s reen of faded* amber photo paper. G-o pla e to stay yet. Just rolled into town. 8i#ured 2>d sha k up at the lo al 7 or hit up a motel.H The basement smelled like the ri(er and bu00 with skeeters. The parlor had the stain of !i6ie* albeit for#otten. 8ine floral wallpaper drooped beneath hand ar(ed* #olden rown moldin#. Bloated by mu##y weather and ne#le ted by time* the room hun hed* like an old feller* too old to look up from his shoes. 7ellow* frilly la e hun# from oak tables with empty pla ements set with tarnished sil(er and dusty hina. Trinkets and trophies were nailed to the walls on plaFues* linin# nearly e(ery in h of the (aulted eilin#. Rusty muskets and shabby* blue suits stood proudly on hay stuffed manneFuins. Sawdust bled from their bree hes and olle ted

on the floor. ' #lass ase presented a tripty h assortment of "onfederate doilies* ea h painstakin#ly stit hed to represent a fra#ment of the Battle at 3anassas. 'side from the #uns and uniforms* the damn pla e sparkled with torn 'meri a memorabilia* a buff>s paradise. GJesus 5oudini.H 2 sat at a weather1stripped piano with ra ked keys that Ein#led beneath my restin# elbows. G3useum* huhD They weren>t kiddin#.H Runnin# my fin#er o(er the Eanky keys* a plume of spe tral dust urled. GThose Johnny Reb Afederates sure knew how to li(e.H @loyd du ked behind an old bar where musty bottles still lined the shel(es. @iFuor #lowed #reen and oran#e in the parlor li#hts. G5ow>s about a Bud* budDH @loyd popped open a mini1frid#e behind the ounter and beamed with i(ory teeth. 'nd with two pops and a slide* 2 had me a bottle o> suds. G7ou #ot a pla e to bed down toni#htDH @loyd swi##ed. G-o*H 2 said* playin# nothin# on the piano. Reminded me of when my kids were youn#. 3innie and 3ay* twins. The e6 and 2 paid for lessons from a one1eyed barber with a kna k for keys. 'nd man oh man* those #irls laid into them s ales like pi#1tailed Ste(ie )onders. G3ama>s #ot a spare room in the old house* one down by the ri(er.H @loyd didn>t look at me when he talked. Eyes were losed* waitin> for me to play 2 think. G3i#hty kind of you* but ain>t about to intrude.H 2 ti kled out a son# 2>d heard my dad play when 2 was a kid* a hanty the shrimpers san#* but 2 didn>t remember the words. 9ddly* the piano played fine for bein# so old. Shit* 2 ouldn>t e(en fi#ure how the thin# held to#ether at all. The pe#s were burnt* ashy* bla k* rooked. 'nd the split wooden top* housed Fui(erin#* red wiresCred as sinew. G3o(e o(er and play somthin> with a bit more pep.H @loyd nud#ed me half1off the ben h* stron# as an o6. G8ine* fine.H 3y knu kles ra ked and fin#ers felt li#hter as 2 played an old Gospel hoot. G)ell* you #onna sin# or whatDH GS oot your ass o(er* honky. @et* )alters show you how it>s done.H Well, !m gonna "#ild right on that shore$ %ight on that shore$ !m gonna &ray right on that shore$' )e san# and hollered to#ether* for the first time sin e A-am. Sure did stir the soul* 2>ll tell you what. Well, !m walking down the road, one day when heard his (aster voice, S&irit came #&on me, )illed my heart with *oy+'

G5ot damnLH 2 ried* rakin# my whole hand from end to end. G8or a piano that>s older An 3ississippi* she tuned up to wi ked perfe tion.H O ; -e6t few days stole me away to a better* simpler time. )ell* simple in some ways. @loyd>n me busted our humps washin> and wa6in> up folks> ars. E(en #a(e a ouple half1hearted tours throu#h the 3useum. 2t weren>t bi# bu ks* but at least we was to#ether a#ain. Thi k as thie(es* no different from before. See* we used to rew a 5uey o(erseas. Bi# u#ly thin# in #reen with a naked #irly painted on the noseCa blushin# blonde with kno kers like pink watermelons. 'rmy Ran#ers* both of us* knee deep in The Shit and mean. )e hoppered in* uniforms blasted flat a#ainst our fu kin> flawless bodies* blasted by the beat of &*;%% shaft horsepower. 5ooah. @loyd was the .Q% "ally Sally and o(ered my ass like no other. 7ou ain>t li(ed on this earth Atil you>(e felt the wind and heat of a .Q% s reamin> o(er your no##in. 5ell* 2 s rambled the reeds a hundred times. 'nd e(ery time 2 knew my only way home was mannin# the #un o(er my head. @loyd stepped onto a stool and peeked throu#h a porthole onto the suds line. The spin of the washer and sprits of the stinkin# sprinkler system reated a musky atmosphere all o(er the pla e. @loyd looked far away* starin# throu#h the #lass hole like a sailor leerin# into the fo# in sear h of a li#hthouse. G7o* Bu k. Pretty thin# out here* 2 think you should see.H @loyd hu kled. Steppin# beside him* 2 peered an obsidian "har#er* ><= with andy apple red a ent lines. G7ep* there she is*H 2 said with a thin1lipped smile. )as a youn# feller ridin# her with a #oatee and a pair of funny lookin# shades with open #roo(es instead of lenses. 2 hurried up the stairs to help lean her up and when 2 #ot there* 2 sure took my time polishin> her rims. O Q The sa##in# ypress bran hes lattered like bones a#ainst the roof of tin and lay. @i#ht rain pattered the por h as a lonely* wet ro kin# hair reaked in the wind. But inside the old sha k the family teamed and fa es beamed. 3ama>s house was a home1 ooked* ountry paradise. Smellin> to hea(en on hi#h of are1 ro ked pots and si00lin# lard. 2 missed home ookin> for two years. 'nd that bi# lady sure knew

her way around a kit hen. Took me in with open arms and fed me like a kin#* liftin# me ba k on my feet. 3ama )alters made me feel like a man a#ain. 5er allused hands hopped and min ed daintily* rubbin# that meat like a masseuse. 3ama )alters peered at me throu#h a (eil of steam. GGreens is all you need* son. They>ll flush all that blue ri#ht out.H GThanks* 3rs. )alters. 'wful kind of you*H 2 said* fishin# a arrot from the sil(er pot. G"all me* 3ama* son. E(erybody does. -ow #et yourself out of them arrots and tell @loyd and the boys supper>s ready.H GThanks* 3ama.H 2 kissed her heek. The whole family lined up and took their seats as they always did. @loyd and 3ama at the head* sin e )inston )alters Senior had passed* while )inston Jr. sat opposite me with a bu ked1toothed #rin he ouldn>t shake. G)hy don>t you say #ra e* Bu kyDH 3ama ooed* easin# into her hair like it were a hot bath. 2 li ked my lips with my eye on the ountry fried steak. G'lri#ht*H 2 started* G2 an do that.H 2 paused* fishin# my brain for old prayers my daddy>d re ited. -othin> in parti ular ame to mind. G@ord. 7>all made thin#s that were #ood. 'nd we>re #athered hear to eat Aem.H G'men*H )inston Jr. hollered and sho(eled a spoonful of butter beans and sweet potato. G)instonLH 3ama pounded the table and the sil(erware rattled. G'nd @ordD 2f you>re listenin#D @ook after the )alters 8amily for bein> so kind to a s ruffy* s oundrel like myself.H 3ama smiled. GSu h a ni e man.H )e du# into about si6 hundred pounds of Southern ookin#: ountry fried steak* hi ken* atfish* hitlinsC ollard #reens* a whole pipin# pile of the best* #olden bis uits in the whole damned South. 'fter li kin> my fin#ers lean twi e* 2 swooped in for thirds. G3i#hty fine* meal* 3a>am. 7ou>(e #ot a #ift.H G7ou know you>re always wel ome* son.H 3ama heaped a mound of sweet potatoes onto my plate. G!eli ious. 3mLH 2n a way* bein# release from "ounty was a lot like omin# home from 4ietnam. 5ome a#ain* you know what 2 meanD 3y own family weren>t nowhere to be found* but the )alters took me in. 2 pled#ed then and there* on e 2 made enou#h to free up my A<= "har#er*

2>d #i(e a little somethin# to 3ama )alters. 2>d #i(e ba k. Green for #reens. )e leaned our plates to the musi of 3ississippi rain. 2 helped tidy up* but 3ama wouldn>t ha(e it* so @loyd Eoined me for a smoke on our way to the #uesthouse. 2>d been sha ked there for a few days* sleepin# in a hammo k nailed to the rafters. The house leaned a#ainst a sleepy willow and near enou#h to the ri(er to hear the wake of tu#boats kno k attails at the shore. @ittle more than a one1story shanty* held to#ether with iron ta ks and plywood* the riss rossed roof of two1by1fours and edar shin#les leaked. The #utter burped most of the ni#ht* runnin# into a muddy dit h. 2 didn>t mind thou#h. The bu00 of the bayou and hushed hurn of the ri(er were my lullaby. The s reen door si#hed and 2 propped it open with an old* rusty1headed a6. GSmokeDH 2 Fueried* already puffin#. G2 Fuit when !addy died*H @loyd said* wa(in# it away with a half smile. G2 an see that.H The hot* dra# filled my lun#s. GSo tell me* bud. )hy ain>t you hit hed yetDH G'in>t met the ri#ht person*H @loyd replied. !roplets of sweat dabbled onto his ollar. GSee ya in the mornin#. 2>m tu kered out.H G7ou feelin> alri#htDH 2 said* wobblin# to a wooden hair. The moment 2 sat down 2 felt the pan# of a deu e pa kin# my olon. G!idn>t mean to brin# thin#s upD 7ou hear anythin# from "athyDH @loyd shook his head. GJust a heada he. 2>ll #rab ya in the mornin#.H @loyd>s dark skin faded* pale and bluish* sallow e(en. )iry (eins wo(e like roots on his ne k* pulsin# and pumpin#. G)ish someone>d Fuit with the musi * thou#h. Been playin> all damn ni#ht.H ' horus of fro#s belted in the mud* beyond my si#ht alon# the ri(erbed. G)hat musi DH O < 5alf past midni#ht 2 woke to burpin# turds. 2 ra ed to the house* naked feet slippin# o(er themsel(es in the mud. ' desperate dash for the toilet. 2>d always had a weak stoma h and irritable bowels* but that ni#ht my #uts twisted like a orks rew* pa ked to the brim with a (ol ani fe al hurri ane. G"hristLH 2 sFuee0ed my dirty pu ker and bit my lower lip. SFuatted in a dit h* obli(ious to rational thou#ht* 2 let my ass rip by the woodpile. 3y belly a hed and bubbled as sweat pooled under the bush of my Asta he. 'fter four minutes of indes ribably foul anal e6pulsions 2 buttoned up and took to buryin# the mess with a

sho(el in the yard. The ni#ht air did me #ood and the rain>d stopped. 4eiled stars and a har(est moon peeked throu#h partin# blue louds. That>s when 2 saw @loyd* shufflin# from the house. 5is head was o ked to the side and olorless moisture #listened on his shirt and hest. Before 2 spoke the poor feller bel hed* spittin# up onto himself this nasty* amber mu ous. 5ell* 2 thou#ht* 3ust ha(e been the beans. G5ey* @loydD 7ou ok* budDH @loyd didn>t answer. 5e shuffled from the steps* into the mu k* shoeless and senseless. 5e bumped into a tree stump* i#nored me ompletely* but made towards the #uesthouse. GRi#ht here* babeLH 2 spoke up* wa(in# the shit1ladden sho(el. @loyd #runted* dra##in# his feet up the por h. 9n e there* he stood motionless* starin# in no parti ular dire tionCthen his head stru k the door. ' Eet of blood streamed from his forehead* oo0in# alon# the brid#e of his nose. G@loydL !amn fool.H Ra in# toward him* 2 heard the ra k of skull on wood like an iron pile dri(en into hard* 'ri0ona shale. )ake up before you kno k yourself outLH @loyd>s broad shoulders urled ba k and with ti#ht bla k fists he drummed the door knob absent mindedly. Gray1#reen fluid dribbled down his hin. G)altersLH 2 shouted* lankin# the sho(el a#ainst the bottom step. @loyd turned towards me* eyes bri#ht as stars and #larin#. They shifted* sear hin# as thou#h blind to my presen e* yet un annily aware. ' strin# of drool stret hed to his feet into a #rim puddle. G@ordy*H 2 mouthed* e6aminin# the oily mumps swell on his fa e and ne k. "halky flakes peeled like snake skin form his body. G@ook* buddy. 7ou need a do tor.H 2 twisted the sho(el handle and splinters dro(e into fin#ers. @loyd sear hed for me* blinkin#. GGood Papa @imba*H he rasped with a (oi e not his own. G-o bodda wif da )olf1killin> white. Papa @imba ain>t #ot no tarry.H GTh> hell youCDH GBy Jin#o anda Saint* by Jin#o anda !e(il. Time to #et allin> on the sleepers.H Bile hoked from his throat* slitherin# like a #rotesFue worm of wret h and spittle. Teary* #ray oo0e dripped from his eyes. GTime to #et allin>* mon.H @loyd skulked* rea hin# for the rusty a6 leanin# by the s reen door. 5is si kly fin#ers #rasped it lumsily. G@loydDH 8ear and diarrhea welled in my #ut. )alters weren>t )alters no more. Rombified and spittin# madness* he ontinued past me.

GPapa @imba. 7our humble root1rolla be omin> home wit da hat het for da 3astah. )ee0 #onna #et to allin> sista prin essesL Sin#* sin#* siiiiin#.H G@loyd* damn it. "ome on now.H 2 took his arm. Bad idea. The a6 head missed my fa e by mere in hes and lod#ed into the tree stump. 2nstin t and trainin# ki ked in from the old days. See* as a Ran#er we>(e #ot this ode. Says: GSomeone tries to kill youD 7ou kill Aem ri#ht ba k.H So* with a swift lan# 2 kno ked @loyd ri#ht upside the head with the business end of the )alter>s family sho(el. @loyd faltered* stumblin# ba kward. The blow was enou#h to make a #ri00ly bear think twi e* but @loydChe Eust kept on omin#. Gur#lin# and raspin# like the motor of a bum eilin#1 fan* his words Eumbled into little more than #rumblin# horrors* wet with 0ombie rud. 5ot* pun#ent (ine#ar spewed from his mouth into mine. 4is ous re(ulsions stu k to my musta he like tar* permeatin# rotten e## stink so (ile a skunk would #naw his own pe ker off. 'nother swin# and ra k* @loyd>s shoulder popped and the a6 linked off of the step. 5e #roaned and fell to his knees* fin#erin# the air* unable to lo ated the handle. 5is eyes #leamed like hi#h beams. GSnap out of it* manLH Raisin# the sho(el o(er my head* the sheen of metal #limmered by the li#ht of the moon. G)ake upLH @loyd didn>t listen* nor did he a knowled#e me in any way. 5is hands sear hed the mud until they onne ted with the wooden handle* so##y with slime. 2n the near hori0on* fro#s eased their rhythmi son# and inse t win#s went still. Then 2 heard it* little more than a whisper* a wisp Cthe Eanky* honky tonk of a piano. G)hat>s all the ra ket out here* @ordy* @ordyLH 3ama stooped o(er the railin# of the farmhouse. GBu kyL @ordy* boy put your trousers onLH GJust #o ba k to bed* 3rs. )alters. @loyd and 2 #ot this. )e was Eust hasin> away a pesky opossum.H 2 stru k @loyd a#ain. G9op. Got AemL -oisy little uss was s rat hin> on the roof.H 7eah* of ourse 2 lied. GTime to wake up*H @loyd burbled* s rat hin# the soil and breakin# off his fin#ernails. G)ake up* Jumbee ome allin>LH Sma ked him a#ain* GRas al won>t stay putLH @loyd went still* slumped forward in the slop of wet earth Eewels of puss and blisters ripplin# like a busted sewa#e line. 3ama shru##ed and returned to bed.

G@loyd*H 2 was addressin# myself more than 2 was him. G7ou #otta work with me now* bud. 7ou ain>t ri#ht. This ain>t ri#ht. 5ell* ba k in A-am we took an oathCwat h ea h other>s ba ks.H The musi Fuieted suddenly* (anishin# from the still* midni#ht air. Somethin# smelled awful* repu#nant like bloated dead and rotten meat. The latter of slow* lumsy footsteps paraded down the dri(eway a hundred yards out. Ro(in# shadows mar hed* rossin# my (iew. G2>m the .Q% "ally Sally now* okD 2 #ot you this* babe.H )alters stirred* his hands rawlin# away* pullin# his dead wei#ht towards the wobblin# mob. 2 o(ered my fa e* huffin# into my slee(e to a(oid the sten h when 2 reali0ed what it was. The dead. 2>d smelled it before* that fetid broilin# smell of orpses pi ked lean by #ulls in the Eun#le sun. Sometimes they swelled in the humidity* full of #as and worms. @loyd rose* pullin# the a6 handle behind him until its rusty blade sparked on the #ra(el road. The mob en losed him* i#norin# me at first* thou#h some inFuisiti(e fa es peered my way. Jaws unhin#ed* eye so kets empty* #apin# mouths (omited ma##ots and skitterin# beetles. 3an#led limbs swayed and bent* drippin# and flakin# as @loyd disappeared into the writhin# mass. 'nd as they (anished into the en roa hin# mist* one dead man lin#ered. 3y bowels Fui(ered. 3y heart trembled* skippin# beats ausin# ha(o to my breathin#. The sho(el shook in my firstsB 2 drew it ba k* ready to fire off a blow* bladed end poised for a messy end. The re(enant swayed* holdin# one skeletal hand to where its ear should ha(e been. Then its deterioratin# lips parted. G)hat did you sayDH 2 hadn>t spoken. The !ead ed#ed nearer* mummified feet lappin# a#ainst the #round. G)hatDH it repeated* sta##erin#. Still* 2 hadn>t spoken. )ith rotten (o al ords* hollow and #hostly* it ou#hed out a final Fuestion. G)ho is Bu ky !ennisDH O N Tra in# the footsteps of the ro(in# horde* 2 followed the !ead 3an* the talker* down a trail of dismemberment. @ost fin#ers* shinin# fillin#s* slews of rotten teeth and hair all marred the pa(ement. Thou#h re(oltin#* 2 felt like a rubberne k on the hi#hway spyin# for #ore as 2 rolled

past at four miles plus. The odd feller was farther #one than the others walkers* nearly disinte#rated. 5is skeletal* inFuisiti(e head bobbed from side to side like a kind of marionette* starin# throu#h a(ernous so kets at e(ery house* orner shop* and tree as we drew loser to town. 8or what 2>d known about 0ombies* he was stran#ely alert. G)hat did you sayDH he asked a#ain* amidst the silen e. G!idn>t say nothin#* bud*H 2 replied* meekly. The !ead shru##ed and ontinued* turnin# the orner towards 4inny>s )onder )ash. The horde had #athered there* passin# beneath the spinnin# washers* spattered by those stanky sprinklers* disappearin# into the (oid with @loyd in the lead. The mindless lump #roped the air with one hand and slun# the a6 o(er his shoulder. 8loodli#hts from ro kin# ri(erboats and a dilapidated steeple* beamed si kly li#ht onto the #ra(el parkin# lot and the parlor porthole #lowed brilliantly. 'nd beneath the thump and whir of the washin# ma hines* 2 heard the distin t ti kle of piano keys. The dead (anished in the mist of spritsy suds. 'nd as he did* the ma hines eased and motors sputtered silent* all earthly li#hts went out. The musi swelled and beneath e(ery linkin# note* the hum of hoirs rose and fell with the ripplin# ri(er. ' horrible hymn of se(ered (o al hords and #ur#lin# death san# a son# of the damned. 2 for ed my on entration* drawin# out my shallow breaths* reinfor in# my falterin# oura#e. The sti ky heat and stillness on the air drummed my rawlin# skin. 2 needed a i#arette* maybe some Ja kie !. 2 approa hed the steps leadin# into the parlor* seemed more une(en than before. 2t was like someone had nailed the soles of my shoes to the steps. 3y feet were stone. G'lri#hty*H 2 muttered* #rippin# the ool do# ta#s beneath my shirt. The aluminum sli kness felt #ood a#ainst my swelterin# torso. G'lri#hty.H "all it a ode of honor mi6ed with the uriosity of stupid1ass man. But* @loyd was down there* fu ked up and freaky. 'nd 2 weren>t about to let my boy #et swallowed up by the de(ilish tunes of some honky tonk piano. So* 2 feathered ba k my hair* fi6ed up the musta he and said a 5ail 3ary before arefully slinkin# those sFueaky "i(il )ar era steps. God forsaken* hellish (oi es roaked like bad plumbin#. They san# the old* desperate son#s of the otton fieldsChopeful* yet dressed in a wreath of bitter a#ony. Thankless lashin# and shattered feet* bones split like herry wood. The rankin# #in* the Fuarters filth* and rotten opossum. 2 heard the Ein#lin# of spurs and the hollow hoot of a rider. The piano played the

ima#es o(er in my mind. 2t haunted me* a mo(in# pi ture in my brain: a (i(id* li(in# dream in my mind>s eye. !own on my belly* 2 ra ked the door and rawled* areful to stay unseen* stealthy. )hat 2 saw ne6t* 2>ll ne(er for#et. @ined up and hained* stood e(ery employee of 4inny>s )onder )ash* stooped forwards amidst a on#re#ation of li(in# dead. @loyd was sFuat and rooked* leathery in skin* with a distorted fa e* ruel.. Teeth like a #ator* fists like an(ils* and poppin# boils like fleshy #eysers. 5e ushered ea h entran ed employee towards the li(in# piano. "halky* white powder swirled from the keys as they played themsel(es. )ood panelin# ra ked and shifted* hea(in# in and out. 't the piano>s base* a wet* red mound of what 2 ould only suspe t were body parts were obs ured by a soakin# sheet. 's for the employees* ea h miserable bastard approa hed the piano and bathed in the powdered like they was #ettin> deloused in "ounty. 4oodoo spores louded the room markin# anyone that tou hed them with boils and #rowths* and undeathly #oop. Seemed to me that on e they han#ed* a de(ilish hun#er o(er ame them* be ause ea h 0ombie immediately rea hed for the mound of but hered flesh...and ate. 2 palmed my fa e* rubbin# my eyes and blowin# my nose. 5ell* 2>d played that fu kin> piano tooL Got the 0ombie power all o(er meL But for whate(er reason 2 was '19kay* un han#ed. 5ell* maybe 2>d shit it out or maybe it was the half1assed and hasty 5ail 3ary. 2 blew my nose a#ain for #ood measureClookin> ba k* that was stupid. GBi# Jin# Jumbee wonda why da wolf1killin> white mon #one all snee0y.H @loyd>s per(erse (oi e shook my rib a#e and fli ked my heart like a marble. G5eebee warned. !on>t step onda ant hill when dey be swarmin>* boy.H G2 don>t see no ants. Just some 0ombied up lo als.H 2 stood up with the sho(el. GSniff da snuff and Eoin den*H @loyd replied* Eewels of puss openin# on his hin. G2>d rather honey up my balls and toss a fist full of fire1breed on Aem.H 2 swallowed hard* mufflin# my hokin# fear. G7>all better snap out of it* or 2>m #ettin#> mean.H GBi# Jin# Jumbee say you inda way. 'nd Jumbee still hun#ry.H 's the reature spoke* 2 spied one of the newly mind1fu ked 0ombie1 ar washers lift up the blood1soaked tarp. The remainin# pie es of 4inny @aGuardia Fui(ered with in(oluntary mus ular response. "learly he was fresh. Some snapped bones were sta ked riss ross like @in oln @o#s and his #nawed skin

was folded neatly as a "hristmas sweater. The !ead man turned to me from the orner of the room. 5e>d been apparently fittin# himself with an old "onfederate uniform* slowly buttonin# the tarnished* brass buttons. G)ho is Bu ky !ennisDH he asked. Teeth in @loyd>s bottom Eaw pier ed his upper lip* unnaturally lon# and sharp. @ooked like a de(il1tou hed wartho#. Gray milky* slud#e spilled like a drunken prom Fueen spewin# in a afeteria trash an after downin> too mu h party pun h. But* those bri#ht eyes #lared with hideous intent: to #naw my bony ass to bits. But* Bu ky !. don>t #o down easy. The 0ombie>s fist smashed into the bar* splatterin> fine whiskey and shattered #lass all o(er. 2 do(e* rollin# into a dummy wearin> a 7ankee uniform* holdin# the fla# for the Q&st 3assa husetts. Jin# Jumbee>s se ond fist au#ht my left arm* spinnin# me like a top into the puddle of 4inny. Standin#* 2 slipped in the rimson sli k. 2 thou#ht for sure the other man1eatin> dead1 heads would sink their teeth ri#ht into my brainCbut the other 0ombies didn>t seem to are one way or another if 2 ruined their #ory feast. Jumbee hollered* (omitin# #ray mud as split timbers and paintin#s shook from the walls. 2 leapt and limboed under a red (el(et rope. But Jumbee plum ripped the rope>s stand ri#ht from the #round and swun# hard* bashin# and rushin# the #lass* kno kin# all the e6hibits onto the floor. Then he brained me with the iron truss post. 2 dropped the sho(el* spit blood* and ollapsed into a blanket of broken #lass. The undead mask of the reature>s fa e a kled. G@loyd*H 2 stammered. 5e was lo ked up somewhere beneath the festerin# horror loomin# abo(e me. 2f 2 ould only rea h him* 2 thou#ht* pullin# a molar from my #ums. G@loyd* man. 2t>s Bu kyL "ome on* now. 2>m your Bu k* dudeL Simmer downLH 2 tired* but there weren>t no stoppin> him. 2 was down and out* belly to the #round* #lass bitin# e(ery soft* pink part of my body. 3y blurred (ision fo used on a sprawled #lass ase with purple (el(et ba kin#* rowned by a bron0e pla ard. There it wasCloaded for o(er a hundred years. Primed and ready* lo ked and o ked. G2>ll be damned.H The pla ard read: ,arriet T#"man!s -olt (odel ./0/ Perc#ssion 1rmy %evolver$ G5ooah.H GBi# Jin# Jumbee>s all dats inda bo6* mon. Sed one day* a lon# time ba k* 2>d be kno kin> wit da !e(il. -ow da day omeLH

G7ou were at my weddin#* bud. Best man. 7ou don>t remember thatD 5ell* you pulled me out of that 5uey. 2 was busted up pretty darn #ood. Sa(ed my ass Eust to snuff meDH The pistol bo6 was lo ked. G2 don>t think so* bud. 'rmy oath* you knowD 5ooah.H Then 2 saw @loyd>s eyes* peekin# from behind the ha0e of fo##y* #ray death. Jumbee or not* boils or noC@loyd was my friend. G5oah*H 2 said a#ain. 5e stopped. !ead in his tra ks. GJumbee*H was all he said* lookin> sFuare and unflin hin# at that damned self1playin# 0ombie powder spittin#* demonia piano. GJumbeeKH @loyd stru##led. G7eah* man. Jumbee. That ain>t you.H 5e was in there* alri#htClost somepla e* but 2>d find him. G2t>s the piano isn>t itDH 's 2 spoke* @loyd stamped his feet and har#ed the piano like a bull with a !e(il dan in> between its horns. The i(ory keys dan ed off of the board* poundin# and Eumpin# like 3e6i an beans. @loyd* Jumbee stared lon# and hard at the keys* dusted by 4oodoo dander. The 0ombies shifted my way. GThat>s it* @loydCyou #ot Aim.H 2 ner(ously eyed the 0ombies. The talker approa hed me proudly in Johnny Reb re#alia* his rusty saber drawn. G)hat did you sayDH G"ome on out* manLH 2 fo used on @loyd. The musi was deafenin#. 2n the ne6t instant* Bi# Jin# Jumbee lifted up the a6 and was an in h from lea(in# my hand lean from my wrist. GShitLH -o hesitation* 2 smashed the #lass of 5arriet Tubman>s smoke wa#on and skinned it. @o ked* o ked* Ban#L 2 planted a .;; aliber slu# in Bi# Jin# Jumbee>s left shoulder. 3i#ht as well ha(e hit him with a ity bus. 8u ker went down Fui k. The blast smoked up the parlor and the piano started bu00in#* li kin#* hissin#* and spittin# up maho#any wasps. Red stin#ers swarmed like a Bibli al pla#ue* nippin# at me* burnin# my already tender skin with (enom. Thank the @ord 2 wasn>t aller#i * but the mumps alone were killer. 2 let the piano ha(e it. 8our more slu#s. But that didn>t stop it from playin#. Jin# Jumbee stirred and #runted* bleedin# #ray* hunky blood from both ends of the bullet wound. 2 #a(e him the boots and snat hed up the hat het. Raisin# the bloody a6 o(er my head* @loyd blinked. G)ake upLH "hoked up* tears flooded my si#ht. The piano musi wouldn>t stop and the 0ombies approa hed* kno kin# a#ainst one

another. The Talker>s saber wa(ered in the air. G)ake upLH 2 s reamed. G)hat did you sayDH Ra#e took o(er and my arms a ted without instru tion from my brain. 2 hopped. 5a ked. Splintered the piano to pie es and splintered the splinters* rushin# and stompin# until little more than a heap of rooked toothpi ks remained. The keys s ree hed. Strin#s moaned. )ood howled and lattered. 9ne minute the hornets fren0ied* the ne6t they dropped dead from the air. Three more wha ks and the piano stopped playin# entirely and a der(ish of powdery debris burst. The #ust of fetid wind rushed o(er me* tussled my perfe t hair and stunk up the pla e with moss and fish. 3a##ots spilled from the e(il instrument>s innards* olle tin# into a wri##lin# mound. GB1Bu kyDH @loyd>s familiar (oi e himed like hur h bells. 5is skin was lean* eyes normal. 5ell* he looked like a slippery million bu ks. )ell* e6 ept for the .;; aliber hole 2 planted in him. GBu kKH he repeated faintly. G@ook outKH The horde mo(ed on me* slow as molasses but in numbers. ' nubby hand pummeled me. 'nother tore my shirt. ' Fui ker feller with one1eye #ummed my arm* but ouldn>t break the skin. 2 put out his remainin# eye with the barrel of 5arriet Tubman>s pistol* and with one ba kwards swin# of the a6* 2 dispat hed two more. 2 was on hi#h* man. "hoppin#* wha kin#* hoppin#* ha kin#. Bathin# in the ada(erous i hors of twenty dead men. G5ow you like that* you 4oodoo )i0ard 5onky TonkLH 2 hollered for Jesus and his fat1bellied an#els. That>s ri#ht* but before 2 ould #loat like an idiot in the #ra es of my own dumbass* bullshitCSee* the 0ombies was finished* but the ruined piano* well* he answered ba k. G799 BEE- 3E!!@2-> 2-!' !'RJ P@'"ES* BI"J7 !E--2S* )9@81J2@@'5L 52G5 T23E B2G J2-G JI3BEE )'JE IP '-! GET "932->L S9I@S -EE! ST2"J2-G* @2TT@E S)EET2E 8E@@' )2T ' GI-LH The (oi e re(erberated into a hoir of ten thousand (oi es* pit hed hi#h and tearin#. 'nd from the splintered remnants of the piano* ma##ots #athered up* wrin#in# and writhin# into an unholy braid of worm. )e>re talkin> one bi# ass honkin> #rub* babe. 2f there were any shit left in me* 2>d ha(e messed myself. -o doubt. O S 2 hea(ed the a6 at what 2 ould only #uess was the ne k. -o di e. The a6 swept lean

throu#h the #hastly hi(e. @ur hin# with fan#s of splintered wood fra#ments* Ea##ed and ruel* the reature rolled loser* impossibly fast for its #irth. GShit on me.H There wasn>t any time for thinkin#. So* 2 did the ne6t best thin#. GRunL @loyd* #et he hell out of hereLH 2 pulled @loyd from his mu k sprawl. G@et>s #o* bud. 2 #ot ha.H S ramblin# up the stairs* out of the parlor* we hi#htailed it. The )onder )ash s rubbed phantom ars a#ain* the diesel purred like a pussy. 2 don>t know what possessed me* but 2 started for the wash. Sure enou#h* Bi# Jin# Jumbee slid from the dark* shamblin# up the parlor stair ase on a million ma##ot le#s. G899@L 799 "'--9T ES"'PE. -9B9!7 G9T T5E @I"J* SPE"2'@@7 ' )52TE1 !E42@* 59-J7 3'ST'5 @2JE 799LH The worm skidded a ross the wet* pa(ement* a lot faster than you>d think a sFuirmin#* pat hwork horror ould. G2 ain>t nobody>s master but my own* babe.H 2 rapped on the diesel drum. 8ull and #u00lin# away at se(enty odd #allons. GSweet* Te6an petrol.H 2 popped the ap* tore off my shirt* and stuffed it inside. The fumes burned my throat* watered my eyes* but my shirt soaked in se onds. GG9--' BIR7 37SE@8 R2G5T 2-!' SJ2- '-! -2BB@E T9 T5E B9-ELH Bi# Jin# Jumbee sFuirmed up the wash and per hed on the fuel tanks* poised to strike. G2>@@ SI"J 79IR 3'RR9)LH G7eah* well. 2>d eat me ookedLH 3y li#hter fli kered flame. Shiftin#* the ma##ot urled around me* a tendril of putrid* arrion filth. Tossin# the li#hter* my shirt went off like a Roman andle followed by a deafenin# blast. ' diesel fireball boomed* hurlin# me like a ra#doll* ro ketin# my harred body throu#h the ool* wash of the sudsy spinner as a million ma##ots si00led and pooped in the immense heat. Shriekin# only for a moment before the fire washed lean any remains. 2 shook like a wet do# and hurried to safety as 4inny>s )onder )ash ollapsed into a sunder. The ele tri al sparked and blew* showerin# hot sparks. G2s* uh. 2s that thin# deadDH @loyd looked strai#ht up. 2 breathed in real deep* filled up the lun#s with moist* Southern air. The ri kets fiddled and somewhere off 2 heard an owl hoot. G8u ker>s ooked.H @loyd nodded. G-i e ni#ht otherwise* huhDH G7eah* Eust lookin> at the stars.H 2 said. They twinkled. G7ou remember anythin#DH G7ou shot me* ri#htDH he asked* nursin# his arm.

G7eah 2 did.H @u kily it blew lean throu#h* plus he was stron#. G7ou #oodDH @loyd #lan ed at the wound. G7eah* looks it.H )e wat hed the stars. -o shooters* but the dipper #littered like pearls on bla k sa k loth. @loyd tou hed my arm. -o words or nothin#. GPretty* ain>t itDH 2 rolled 5arriet>s ool ni kel hamber with a dirty thumb. G7ou>ll ne(er #uess whoseC.H 8rom the smokin# pyre a burnin# skeleton emer#ed. Iniform abla0e* wieldin# a droopin#* red1hot saber. The !ead talker* rumbled to its knees. G)hose is Bu ky !ennisD )ho is heD )hat did you sayD )ho is Bu kyCDH 2 raised 5arriet* pulled ba k the hammer and fired. Smolderin# skull blasted into the wet pa(ement* hissin# as the ashy shards lattered. The saber urled into a heap of oran#e metal* steamin# in the water* until its twisted blade faded into bla k. G2>m Bu ky !ennis. 2 didn>t say nothin>.H ***** T5E I-SETT@2-G* I-"'--7* I--ER42-G* STR'-GEST +and only, RE"9R!E! "'SE 98 S9IT5ER- E?I2@'TER'@ '-! 'B9R2G2-'@* "'--2B'@ P7G37 S52T1 82E-! TERR9R2R'T29-S '-! 4'3P2R2" J2!-'PP2-GS T9 5'4E E3ERGE! 8R93 5I-TS42@@E +in 4erney "ounty* 3ississippi,* !IR2-G T5E @'TTER 5'@8 98 T5E &=S% @E'P 7E'R* IP9- )52"5 89IRTEE- SPR7* S9IT5ER- 79IT5S )E-T 32SS2-G 2- T5E @'4'T9R7 98 T5E 5ERS5'@@ T. )ET89R! STREET 7.3.".'. 9T5E -2G5T 98 "9@9-E@ P52@@2P 2S''" @EB9)2TR>S RET2RE3E-T 8R93 T5E "IST9!2'@ ST'88 98 S'2! EST'B@2S53E-T* )5ERE'TER 3R. BI"J7 S9@939- !E--2S )'S S)9R- 2- 'S 52S REP@'"E3E-T* 2T BE2-G -9TE! T5'T T5E '89RE3E-T29-E! SI""ESS9R )'S 2- -9 )'7 S5'PE 9R 89R3 2-49@4E! )2T5 T5E !2S'PPE'R'-"ES 9- )52"5 T52S P2E"E 98 S59RT -'RR'T24E "E-TERS IP9-* T99J RES2!E-"E 'T 4ER-E7 "9I-T7>S 9-E '-! 9-@7 79I-G 3E->S "5R2ST2'- 'SS9"2'T29- '-!* !2! !IT28I@@7 '-! '!32R'B@7 PER89R3: "@E'-2-GS 98 T5E S2-JS* T92@ETS* '-! IR2-'@S* 'S )E@@ 'S 89"ISE! 'TTE-T29- T9 ST9"J2-G 98 P'PER T9)E@S '-! 4E-!2-G

3'"52-ES* 2-"@I!2-G +but not limited to,: ' 8'-T'* 3E-T59@ "2G'RETTE* '-! B2G B2@@7>S SI-!'7 @9TTER7 T2"JET !2SPE-SERB T52S )'S R9IT2-E* I-T2@ T5E E4E-TS 98 8R2!'7* 8EBRI'R7 $%th +a date that will ne(er be for#otten amon#st the townspeople of 5unst(ille,* )5E- RE4ERE-! 3'RT2- ). "R99- )'S 89I-!* E3'"2'TE! '-! S'@@9) 8R93 3'SS24E 5E'! TR'I3' '-! @9SS 98 B@99! '-! B9!2@7 8@I2!S* 2- T5E S'I-' '8TER 5'42-G P'SSE! '- I-8@IS5E! 394E3E-T 98 T5E B9)E@ 2- T5E @'!2ES @'4'T9R7 'T T5E 5ERS5'@@ T. )ET89R! 7 +this not bein# out of the ordinary as the men>s room had been losed for ser(i e in response to the pre(ious in idents,B 52S B9)E@ 394E3E-T )'S TESTE!* "9-82R32-G T5E T23E 98 ETPI@S29- T9 BE N:%%P3 +"entral Standard Time, )5ERE'S RE4. "R99->S T23E 98 !E'T5 )'S !ETER32-E 'T N:&;P3 +"ST, B7 3E'-S 98 @'"ER'T29- T9 T5E "R'-2I3* ETP9SIRE 98 T5E 8R9-T'@ @9BE* and 3'SS24E P@'S3' @9SS* 7ET -9 RES2!I'@ +or E6 ess, 8@I2! )'S 89I-! 'T T5E S"E-E* )52"5 )'S B'88@2-G@7 "@E'- 98 '-7 3ESS 9R -EE! 89R @2"E-SE!* B9-!E!* '-! 2-SIRE! ST'TE B295'R'R! "@E'-IP PERS9--E@B T9 '492! ' RI"JIS '-! JEEP -E'RB7 RES2!E-TS* P'TR9-S* '-! 4'R29IS 79IT5 9RG'-2R'T29-S 2- SESS29- )2T5 8I@@ ISE 98 T5E PR9PERT7 '-! 8'"2@2T2ES* T5E '89RE3E-T29-E! 3R. BI"J7 !E--2S )'S* T5ERE'8TER* E-@2STE! T9 S"RIB !9)- T5E S'I-' )2T5 "93ET +amon# other o(er the ounter* household leansers, 2- '- E889RT T9 3'2-T'2- 8'"E '-! PREST2GE 89R T5E 4'@IE! "933I-2T7 EST'B@2S53E-T* '-! T5E 52ST9R2"'@ 82GIRE +author of "onfederate 'utomatons,* 8R93 )52"5 "93ES S'2! EST'B@2S53E-T>S -'3ES'JE* PR98ESS9R 5ERS5'@ T. )ET89R! BE2-G ' PR932-E-T "242@ )'R 2-4E-T9R* RESPE"TE! '-! 59-9RE! -9T 9-@7 'S ' GRE'T T52-JER* S"2E-T2ST* '-! P52@9S9P5ER* BIT '@S9 'S ' @E'!ER 2- T5E 82E@! 98 P'R'-9R3'@* 9""I@T* '-! 3ET'5I3'- RESE'R"5 2-T9 @ESSER J-9)-* '@"5E32"'@ '-! E"T9P@'S32" S"599@S 98 T59IG5T* S93E 98 )52"5* 3R. !E--2S 9-"E* "IRRE-T@7* '-! )2@@ "9-T2-IE T9 BE I-)2@@2-G@7 8'32@2'R )2T5* BIT )59SE "92-"2!E-T'@ P'R'@@E@S 5'4E -9 "9--E"T29- T9 T5E E4E-TS "9-"ER-2-G T5E "'--2B'@ P7G37 S52ET1 82E-!* 9R T5E !2S'PPE'R'-"ES 98 T5E PRE429IS@7 RE8ERE-"E! 89IRTEE-

S9IT5ER- T)EE-S* 98 )593 T)E@4E 3'-G@E!* SJ2--E!* !R'2-E!* !2S3E3BERE!* !2SE3B9)E@E!* '-! !EB9-E! "9RPSES )ERE RE"94ERE! 2T5E 9@73P2"1S2RE! S)2332-G P99@* 9- SI""EE!2-G !'7S B7 9-E 3'RT5' @E-9RE GREE-BERG1ST2R3 'T <:%%'3 +"ST,* PR9"EE!2-G T5E P.R.S.@.B.". +Puerto Ri an Senior @adies Badminton "lub, !'2@7 REG23E 98 )'TER J9GG2-G* R93'- )'TER "5'2RS* '-! @EG S?I'T 2-TER4'@S* 98 )52"5 RE"E-T@7 RET2RE! "9@9-E@ P52@ @EB9)2TR 5'! BEE- -9TE'B@7 89-! 98 2- T5E @'TTER 5'@8 98 52S E3P@973E-T 'S T5E 5ERS5'@@ T. )ET89R! "IST9!2'@ 'SS9"2'TE* '-! 8IRT5ER39RE* 'SJE! T9 RES2G- 94ER* 5'42-G "RE'TE! '- I-P@E'S'-T E-42R9-3E-T 89R T52RT7 9!!* S"'-T2@7 "@'! '-! E@!ER@7* PIERT9 R2"'- B'!32-T9- "5'3PT29-S +Si6 time hampions at "ity* State* "ounty* and Southern Re#ionals,B IP9- @EB9)2TR>S RES2G-'T29-* BI"J7 !E--2S -9T 9-@7 REP@'"E! 523* BIT 9- 9""'S29-* )'S 2-42TE! 'S ' GIEST T9 'SS2ST 2- T5E TE'"52-G 98 B'"J15'-!E! S5ITT@E"9"J TE"5-2?IE* 'S 3R. !E--2S )'S ?I2TE @E'R-E! 2- T5E P@'78I@ 'RT 98 B'!32-T9-* 5'42-G !E4E@9PE! ' T'STE 89R T5E G'3E !IR2-G T5E SE"9-! 98 T)9 T9IRS 2- T5E 42ET-'3 )'R* '-! T59IG5 52S TE'"52-G )'S 2-8RE?IE-T 'T BEST* 5E )'S* 2-!EE! SE'S9-E!* )E@@1@2JE!* '-! PRE8ERRE! '39-GST 3'-7 98 T5E 49@I-TEER 2-STRI"T9RS* )59 98 @'TE* -9 @9-GERE! 'PPE'RE! -9R '-S)ERE! ?IER2ES* '-! '8TER ' PER29! 98 89IR !'7S* )ERE !E"@'RE! 32SS2-G B7 @9"'@ "9I-T7 'IT59R2T2ES '-! @2-JE! T9 T5E 59RR282"* I-8'T593'B@E* '-! 2-!ES"R2B'B@7 GRIES93E !E'T5S 'TTR2BITE! T9 T5E S'3E "'--2B'@* P7G37 S52T182E-! 5'I-T2-G... *****

&&&THE HE%SH LL T& #E'FO%D Y

O & 3y perspe ti(e han#ed the moment 2 noti edC2 weren>t bothered by the stink of another man>s shit. 5ell* 2>d be the first to admit there must>(e been a whole stampede of #enius sons of

bit hes e6pandin> their ons iousness on the por elain throne. 7ou don>t Eust wake up and split the atom* you knowD 7ou pop a (ein and pin h that su ker off. 's for me* Bu ky !.D )ell* there 2 was pushin> a so##y* fe al1matted mop* wonderin# Eust why in holy hell these assholes ouldn>t pin h into the bowl. )asn>t always that #ross* thou#h. That>s for darn tootin>. See* folks were s ared to use the men>s room at the 5ershall T. )e6ford 7.3.".'. be ause of all the killin#s. Sheriff )ade Be(erly and his bu#1eyed* sla k1Eawed deputies didn>t seem to ha(e a lue. 8ourteen boys* a librarian* a priest* and the two rookie dete ti(es from Ja kson(ille they sent to monitor the pla e at ni#htCall dead from some way or another* sometimes not all in one pie e. The ase went serial when the dete ti(es bit the dust* so the 8B2 flew in from !.". with fan y suits and hats. They left two months later* when the handbook and omputer pro#rams pulled up donut. Tru kloads of -ational Guard boys* s anners* trippers* ameras* e(en a de(i e that tra ked pheromonesCstill nothin#. 2n the end* the suits alled it a town matter. 9rdered the pla e losed. "losed until about a year a#o. 2t was de ided the killer used the 7.3.".'. like a trophy room* that the on entration of the murders was elsewhere. ElsewhereD 5ell* 4erney ain>t #ot but two thousand people. 5ere* there* or a ross the streetCwhat>s the differen eD -aturally the killer followed the patrons out* did his #rim business* and arted the bloodless* #narled bodies ba k into the bathroom. 'nyhow* thin#s had been Fuiet for a while. That>s about the time they started hirin# staff a#ain. 3e. 2 ran# out the mop and hosed off the linoleum floor with a hefty helpin# of bri#ht blue leanser. Stuff ate away the #rime like a id* potent. 2 #ot nosebleeds whene(er 2 whipped out the industrial fluid. -ose it hed too. 3y yellow #lo(es were too soapy* so 2 s rat hed the s hno00le on my slee(e. @ookin# in the mirror* my hair>d ne(er been worse. 2>d been rowned with eternal bed1head sin e 2 took that fu kin> Eob. But* 5ell 2 needed the money* man. "ops still had my ><= "har#er impounded and damn it* dudeC2 needed to ruise. Parole kept me an hored in the "ounty* but that was up in a year. Soon* 2>d hi#htail it out of that 3ississippi misery and roar my en#ine o(er to )i hita. 3aybe #et me some. G!ennisL 7ou>re paid to mop the shit* not stare at itDH That was "layton the boss man. Sto ky* little uss about half my a#e with hair like a sprin# hi kenB "lay (olunteered. 7eah* that>s ri#ht: a (olun1fu kin>1teer that lo(ed #ettin> up in my business e(ery damn day. G'nd trim that musta he if you>re #onna sport it* okay* !ennisD 7ou ro#er that* !ennisDH G)il o* sir. @oud and lear.H 2t was true too. !amn. 3y Asta he and hops #rew to#ether.

8ull beard. 'in>t proud* but life weren>t no bree0e. Gi(e it another month and 2>d be olle tin# strays two by two. GJust finishin> up in here.H G9h* and !ennisDH "lay s rat hed his head and e6amined the empty stall. G7ou e(er find that toilet seatDH G-ope.H 2 wheeled the sFueaky bu ket to the supply loset beside the pool. 8ather @ouis and Rabbi )einenbaum stewed in the hot tub* #ossipin# like usual. Those two troublemakers ame e(ery 3onday for a soak. 3ostly Eust told dirty Eokes* albeit tame Eokes. -i e fellers. GE(enin> Bu k*H they hailed. G8ather* Rabbi.H 2 nodded ba k. G5a(en>t seen you in hur h lately*H 8ather @ouis always asked. G9r temple*H Rabbi )einenbaum always added. They lau#hed* thou#ht is was funny as he k. GSo* you two ats makin> 5oly water or whatDH 8ather @ouis did a Fui k si#n of the ross and the Rabbi took a swi# of his Perrier. GPea e be with y>all*H 2 said and #a(e Aem Spo k>s li(e lon# and prosper fin#er1fork. Turnin# the orner* 2 unloaded my art and slipped out of my o(eralls. God* 2 hated that Eob. But when 2 lo ked out it meant 2>d be headed home. 'nd 2 hated home e(en worse. O $ 8rid#e was on the frit0* so 2 had my Bud warm. Pi kle Ear was empty* e## arton li#ht as a feather. GPork and beans it is*H 2 said. The able fluttered in and out and the only thin# the motel mana#er maintained was his fake tan. 7eah* 2 said motel. Eddie Pea o k>s Roadside 2nn. Sat outside of town* spittin# distan e from the Ja kson(ille Spa#hetti 8a tory. !amn* 2>d ha(e #i(en anythin# for spa#hetti o(er those ran id ass beans. 3y answerin# ma hine flashed. Eddie Pea o k wantin# his rent 2 presumed. 2 i#nored it and dialed what 2 thou#ht was her number. 2 always kid myself that 2>d for#otten itCbut 2 didn>t. 5er man pi ked up. G"hrist.H GSorryDH he Fueried. G5ey* bud. Bu ky here. "an 2 talk to herDH 2 asked* real ni e like. GShe>s out*H he said* breathin# hard. G2>ll tell her you alled.H G)ait* hold on* now. )hat about the kidsDH 3innie and 3ay* my beauties* my twin #irlsC

the real reason 2 alled. G"an 2 say hi orDH GThey>re out in the pool with some friends*H he said. G7eah*H he paused* G-ow>s probably not the best time* Bu k. )e>re about to open presents.H GJust a Fui k 5appy Birthday. Just one minute* man.H 3y tears already welled but you an bet your ass there wasn>t a Fui(er in my (oi e. G7eah* yeah. 2 know.H 5e talked real Fuiet. G"all ba k a bit later* huh. 2t>ll be better.H GBetter. 9kay. Ri#ht. JustC.H The refri#erator sputtered. GSay that a#ainDH GJust tell Aem their daddy alled* will yaDH 'nd that was that. )hen 2 hun# up the phone the little din# knelled like a funeral bell. 2 dra##ed my menthol i#arette down to the filter and put it out on my boot. G"all ba k later*H 2 repeated. 3y fin#ertips felt stran#e* #hostly and 2 shru##ed off the pan#s of loneliness. The bu00in# radio wasn>t any kind of help either. Bu ky !ennis really was a GPil#rim of Sorrow.H O : Gutter duty at the 5ershall T. )e6ford 7.3.".'. was tou#h. See* a moderately trained master of the ustodial arts an handle anythin#. E(en three stories. !irty and ta6in# on the ba k* the duty meant 2>d be sleepin> on the floor to strai#hten out* but 2 had me a new system in(ol(in# pool leanin# tools. 'nd shit* bud* it almost made the #utter sweeps fun. 2>d take them lon# ass poles and du t tape a #arden trowel to the end of it sidewaysCuse that to s rape lean all the lea(es and Eunk. E(ery on e in a while 2>d ha(e to toss out a sFuirrel skeleton. )ell* that or a mummified pi#eon ar ass. 3ostly sti ks and #unk thou#h. But on that parti ular day* 2 needed me a whole new strate#y. GSon of aC.H Tried to wat h my lan#ua#e around the kids. They played foursFuare in the tennis ourt. GC#un*H 2 finished. The trowel #ot hun# up and lanked around. "limbin# the latter* 2 noti ed a sli(er of missin# tar on the roof and the pole was au#ht in the #ap. Gra(el tri kled* rattlin# o(er my shoulders like offee beans from a tin an. Small* 2 thou#ht* Easy pat h Eob. 2 e6amined the rift. Tar dripped from the eilin#. 9dd* but 3ississippi did #et damn hot* e(en in early autumn. Peerin# throu#h the portal* 2 noti ed s rewed up rafters* ra ked down the middle* but holdin#. 5ershall T. )e6ford was an older buildin#* prewar and hadn>t had a de ent

retro1fit sin e the &=<%s. )ouldn>t ha(e #i(en the dama#es another thou#htCnot with the rest of the rap that was wron# with the damn pla e. But the law marks perked my interest. !eep* sharp #roo(es tattooed support beams. 2 sFuee0ed throu#h the #ap* my blue o(eralls bla k with sti ky tar. 2 sat on a led#e* lookin# down into the 9lympi swimmin# pool. Some kids in floaters played 3ar o Polo. G)hat we #ot hereDH 2 said* eyein> 3iss 3olly>s lea(a#e and tra in# the marks with my fin#ers. !ried blood hipped away. GRa oons a#ain.H ' shadow on the other side of the #ymnasium* up a#ainst he aluminum air du t shifted in the midmornin# sunli#ht. 2 in hed o(er the beam arefully. Reminded myself twi e if 2 fell 2>d splash into the hot tub with 3iss 3olly. The shadow at the end of the beam swun# ba k and forth sli#htly* a pendulum. Probably a loose timber* maybe a broken air du t. ' flat* wooden led#e brid#e the beams* nailed sturdy. 8ootin# weren>t a problem* so 2 ed#ed loser onfidently* that was* until 2 met the dark. )afts of rank methane filled my nose and stunk like a ho# house. 8lies lun# on my arms. )ithout a flashli#ht 2 ouldn>t see nothin#. 2 sparked my li#hter. GSon of a bit hLH 2 spit the words out like a flat beer. G)hat in the hellDH 2t hun# upside1down* far as 2 ould tell* swin#in# from se(ered ele tri al ablin# like a ada(er in the #allows . Pointy ears* flat snout* and 2>ll be damned if that missin# toilet seat wasn>t around its ne k like a ollar. GJesus 5oudiniLH 2 yelled like the dumbass that 2 was. But* when 2 took the @ord>s name in (ainCshit* manCthe Thin# weren>t> too pleased. Red* beady eyes flashed open* fren0ied and foul. )hite* leathery win#s stret hed and fan#s spat inky fluid onto my shirt. 2 flipped* dudeClost my footin# and slid ba kwards off of the platform* nuttin# myself on the beam* then down* down* down* plummetin# three stories into the hot tub. Splash was so bi# it left the tub half1empty. 2 looked up* e6pe tin# to see that rapid hell1win#ed heathen barrelin# like a boo0ed up Jamika0e. But it was #one* disappeared in a plume of swampy* #reen #as. 2 listened for it* but heard nothin# o(er the lau#hter of kids. G9h* GodL 3r. !ennis* you alri#htDH 3olly>s tits bobbed in the water like buoys. G!idn>t kno k your head did youD "ould>(e #otten a on ussion.H 3olly>s lisp was endearin#. 'nd she was ute as a daisy. )ell* ute as a daisy with a lisp. G2 feel like an ornery mule>s been rammin> my aC.H 3iss 3olly frowned.

GButt>s a little sore* that>s all.H O ; 7>all that knew me ba k then* knew Bu k !ennis had seen some shit. 2 ain>t talkin> A-am* neither. See* there>s the world we know and the world as it is. 8i(e years a#o* 2>d ha(e e6plained Eust about e(erythin# away to the Shit 5appens !o trine. But years ti k by* people #et old and sil(er knits the beard. 7ou #et to thinkin#* 5ell* e(ery damn thin# in a man>s life an>t be halked up to shit happenin#. 3ust be purpose. So* 2 de ided to make some. Purpose. -ot shit. @loyd re((ed up the en#ine of his &=<: Pontia Tempest as we pulled into the only (isitor spa e at 4erney "ounty "ommunity "olle#e. G7ou feel that shimmyDH @loyd said* furlin# his brow and bitin# his pink ton#ue. G2 feel a bit of a bump when she shifts*H 2 said with my ear to the dash like a "herokee listenin# for buffalo. G-ah* 2 don>t think feel it.H @loyd was an old 'rmy buddy. 5ooah. Sa(ed my life in A-am and 2 returned the fa(or at 4inny>s )onder )ash about a year earlier. Ised to man a 5uey and ki ked ass for the I.S.'. -owD Shit* bud. -ow 2 pushed a fu kin> mop and @loyd mi6ed sau e for Rao>s "rayfish "urry 5ouse. GSo* where is this !o "horbDH @loyd pi ked his 'fro in the mirror. G@ady on the phone said he tea hes in !onald Pearse 5all. The buildin# with the ta o stand in front.H 2 folded up my a(iators* brushed up my hops and musta he and sli ked ba k my hair. 2 may>(e been pushin> forty* but 2 still had the harmin> looks of Johnny "ash. ASides* you #ots to look #ood for them youn# uni(ersity type ladies* know what 2 meanD 2 hadn>t been intimate with a women in three years. Ten minutes and two ta os later @loyd and 2 stepped into the Roolo#y offi e in sear h of some answers. Stuffed bad#ers* birds* li0ards* and a shit load of bu#s pinned to bulletin boards lined the walls* oddly paired with al ohol safety posters. Jars of formaldehyde and ritter orpses #limmered u#ly* spyin# from dead* #oo#ly eyes with ton#ues unfurled. They>d seen better days* hief. GIm* an 2 help you* #entlemenDH ' urly haired dude with hops and a holiday sweater peeked out from a book loset. G2>m lookin> for !o "horb. The animal #uyDH 3y #a0e was stu k on a bullfro# in a Ear. 2 think it blinked.

G2>m !wayne "horb.H The little feller stru##led to mo(e a stron# bo6. 2 sat at one of the desks. G!o * y>all know about ritters. Ri#htDH 5e nodded. G?uite a bit* yes. Please* all me !wayne. 'nd uh* you areDH G5ey* man. Sorry about that.H 3y manners were shot. G-ame>s Bu ky !ennis* 5ershall T. )e6ford 7.3.".'. "ustodial 'sso iate. This is @loyd* "hief Sau ier at Rao>s "rayfish "urry 5ouse.H !wayne stood o(er the stron# bo6. G'ndKyou>(e #ot some Fuestions about wild lifeDH 5e lifted a small* framed aterpillar ada(er from the stron# bo6. )e knelt in for a better look. G)e ordered a few hundred spe imens form Papua -ew Guinea this year. This #uy arri(ed yesterday. 2t>s been really e6 itin#.H "horb studied it* openin# a leather Eournal where he tra ed his fin#ers o(er some notes and drawin#s. GSo* you>re like* Eust a bu# #uy orKH 2 bit my own lip* stupid thin# to say. G-o* no. 2>m a tually fo used in the mammalianCbut 2 an>t help my e6 itement o(er new spe ies. 2>m a bit of a rypto0oolo#ist* you see. -o body thou#ht these little fellas were real until about a year a#o.H GSo you ould* you know* identify stuff.H G7es*H he said* abruptly. GGreatL See* 2 found this bi#* beefy* weird ass bat1lookin> thin# at the 7Cway up in the rafters abo(e the pool.H 2>m ertain the bullfro# blinked. G' #iant batDH The professor s rat hed the tip of his nose with his pen* doodlin# on his fa e a identally. GSure* bats roost around here all the time. "arry diseases too.H G2t ain>t normal. This bastard>s the si0e of a S hwinn* man. 'll white* leathery* burnt up lookin> with hu#e* red eyes* and ornery as a #ator. 8an#s like forks* know what 2 meanDH !wayne "horb didn>t respond and @loyd put his hand on my shoulder. G3aybe 2 was mistaken*H 2 said. "learly* the !o had himself better thin#s to do. 3aybe he was hun#ryC#oin# to fry his brand new aterpillar on its pushpin and #et lun hin#. G)ait* now. 2>m not dis reditin# anythin# that you say you>(e seen. @ots of people see mutant strains of animals they an>t e6plain. "hupa abras for e6ample are simply man#e1ridden oyotes. 't least that>s my theory.H GSo you>re thinkin> we>(e #ot a ro#ue* mutant* #i#anto1bat han#in# Around the 7.3.".'.H 2

tapped out a i# and lit her up. G4ery unlikely*H he barked* urtly. "horb adEusted his #lasses and ran his fin#ers throu#h his urly hair. G@ots of mutant strains pop up* you know. 2n the &S=%s a olle tor found a stran#e* #iant eared bat in -ew Guinea. -e(er found a spe imen like it sin e. 2t was likely to be a stran#e (ariant of a nati(e spe ies. GThis hum weren>t a lo al* !o .H ' lon# dra# of menthol swirled from my mouth and 2 took three steps out the door. G)ait* 3r. !ennis 2 didn>t mean toC.H "horb betrayed a smu# tone* stuffy as the !uke of Pumperni kel. G7eah.H 2 didn>t look ba k. G@loyd* lets roll* babe.H O Q "layton wouldn>t listen about the bat. 5is thin lips sma ked o(er the sti ky "lark bar* ho olate smud#es at the orners of his mouth. Guess he was too pissed off to eat lean. 8ar as "lay was on erned* and the rest of the world for that matter* disappearan es had ended. The poli e finished their report. 5ell* e(en arrested a nut Eob in Geor#ia* 2 heard. SFuirrelly lookin> #uy with a left lip and a la0y eye that apparently tar#eted youn# men and had a thin# for the ma abre. "ase losed. -ope. "lay wanted me worryin# one thin#: the poolside puke that needed moppin# before 3olly>s ne6t swim lass. 2 si#hed. 8at kid runnin# by the pool a#ain* must>(e been the fifth time 2>d leaned up his arrots hunks and up ake. )ho>s feedin# their kid that may arrots anyhowD GBu k* 2 don>t are if you saw "aesar>s #host. 'll you #otta do is keep the pla e lean and tidy* #ot itDH "layton slowed to a rawl. 5e looked me sFuare in the eye* sober as a prea her. G@ook* Bu k. 2f you an>t shape upKyou>re #one. 2t isn>t e6a tly hard to find a #uy to push a mop* okD 2t>s not. Get your fu kin> a t to#ether* okD 2t>s nothin# personal.H G7eah*H 2 said. 'nd he was ri#ht. Bein# useless ain>t personal. That>s for other folks to de ide. O < 2 ran out of Ja kie !aniels halfway throu#h dialin# her number for maybe the twentieth time. The tele(ision blared a op showB a Gwho done itH pro#ram with this o(er wei#ht pri(ate

eye #uy huntin# ounterfeiters. 2 wat hed it most of the ni#ht* all the while thumbin# the dial of my 3innesota 4ikin#s telephone. Pullin# the wheel around* listenin# to the bin#* 2 didn>t noti e the redits rollin# on the tube. Gumshoe didn>t sol(e the aper for me. 8ish sti ks ra kled in the o(en and some left o(er urried rayfish bubbled on the sto(e. -othin# tasted ri#ht thou#h. 'round midni#ht 2 made the all. !on>t know what 2 was thinkin#* really. Just wanted to talk to the #irls. See if they #ot their birthday #ifts. The phone ran# for two minutes. -o ma hine. 'nd no pi ked up either. The bottle of Ja k !aniels was hea(y in my hand. 5ell* 2 was hea(y. 2 smashed the son of a bit h a#ainst the wall. )oke the nei#hbor>s do# and #ot 3iss 5adly ursin# a#ain. 'fter 2 leaned up the broken #lass from the arpet sha#* 2 didn>t sleep. 'nd the ne6t thin# 2 knew* 2>d walked throu#h the doors of 5ershall T. )e6ford in my ski((ies. 2 sta##ered to my lo ker and thou#ht 2 heard the pool>s heat pump hu##in#. 2 wobbled o(er* steppin# on my own feet. 3aintainin# a pool was work. 7ou>(e #ot to be aware of e(ery1 damn1thin#: hlorine le(els* temperature le(els* water le(els. Sometimes rats #et man#led in the pumps: mi e* (armints and birds* tooC#ets pretty #narly. But* it wasn>t the heat pump hollerin#. 2t was "lay. 3y tool belt lattered as 2 stumbled into the pool area. "lay s reamed* all tore up to hell. 't first #lan e* 2 thou#ht it were his lothes that were torn* but 2 soon re o#ni0ed the flounderin# pink and red. 8lesh from his arms and hest hun# off of the mus le like strips of ba on and a #ood si0ed tuft of his blonde urly s alp flapped to the ri#ht side of his mauled fa e. )hen he tried to speak his (o al ords sounded knotted up. S reams e hoed off of the walls* rattlin# in the shadowy orners of the pool hall. 2 ran to him* #rippin# my res ent wren h like a rosary when t emer#ed* swoopin# from the dark re esses of the rossed rafters. )hite leathery win#s beatin#* breath stinkin# of wet iron and fun#us. The man1eatin# fiend stru k* tearin# the rest of "lay>s s alp lean off* #nawin# on the urly strip like "openha#en hew. 2 hurled the wren h* strikin# the reature>s forehead. The monstrosity hooked its head* a #lowin# #a0e of horror peered throu#h me. 3y heart drummed like a tribal timpani. Thump. Boom. Thump. Boom. The reature presented itself* proudly. 2t wasn>t a bat at allCno bat 2>d e(er seen. 3ore like

a win#ed1mid#et imp with spidery limbs. 4ampy>s fa e seemed human enou#h* but elon#ated with fan#s protrudin# from two swollen* albino lips. Tusks hun# like si kles #rinnin#. The hybrid1py#my1(ampire s ree hed and rea hed for me. 8u ker had thumbs* too. @on#* horrible thumbs with oily* bla k nails aked with tiny* wet pie es of "layton. G@et>s #o* bud. 2 #ot ha.H 2 hoisted "lay o(er my shoulder and made for the door. The steam of the sauna at the end of the orridor pooled like marsh #as on the floor. 2 leapt o(er inner tubes and foam noodles* but lost my footin# on a slippery boo#ie board. G"rapLH "lay whee0ed* heart beatin# faintly a#ainst my ba k. Then suddenly* as if woken from a ni#htmare* "layton ried out. 5e Eerked and #ur#led* then nothin#. Still. 4ampy>s putrid stink flooded my nose. "lay>s insides spilled to the floor* snarin# me with fe al1pa ked intestines. 2 swear on 3ama>s birthstone 2 heard 4ampy hu kle with wi ked1ass #lee as it fluttered up into the darkness with "lay>s lower half. Blood spilled from the rawlspa e* splashin# #ory mist like a bloody waterfall. The pool turned pink. 'lone a#ain* 2 lost ons iousness to the rhythmi lullaby of "lay>s left1o(er foot plu##in# the filter. O N 7eah* 2 had me a rap sheet. -ot too lon#* but marked with the bi# 3. 7ou know* 3urder. !id 2 do itD Sure did. )as it murderD 2f murder>s lubbin# a se(en1foot tall 5ound of 5ell into a kit hen floor with a an of spa#hettiC2>m #uilty as sin. But in the end* after all the hot li#hts* sweaty re orded serenades* and a mean ass Jud#eCpoli e dropped the har#es. Still lost two #ood years in "ounty thou#h. 'nd they impounded my !od#e. G7ou #onna tell us what happened* 3r. !ennisDH !ete ti(e 8at 'ss asked with a mouth full of burrito. 5e stared me down with a la0y eye* s rat hin# that Ei##lin# belly of his. 8at 'ss fired down a thousand year old hurro and hased it with old offee. G)ellDH he added* i#norin# the beans lumped on his tie. G)hen does Sheriff Be(erly #et inD 2>d like to talk to a man with some sense.H 2 needed to take a rap* man. 2>d been in the bo6 too lon#. G2t>s a 5unts(ille matter* !ennis. Be(erly>s in )i hita anyhow.H 8at 'ss pi ked at the wa6 in his ear. G7ou #ot the wron# #uy up in Geor#ia. That>s for damn sure*H 2 told Aem strai#ht. The interro#ation room felt like a smokehouse. Good thin# my lun#s were a ustomed to it.

Shit man* 2 ima#ined they were two shri(eled up* #arba#e ba#s fillin# and emptyin# o(er and o(er* waitin# for the day they>d up and tear. !idn>t used to smoke thou#h. Pi ked up that habit in 4ietnam. 8i#ured 2>d Fuit for my babies* but 2 ne(er seen Aem. Those days smokin# kept me e(en* a little #ift to myself. Besides* my perspe ti(e on mortality had han#ed. G3ind if 2 bum a i#DH 2 asked. G)hen you start talkin#* maybe.H 8at 'ss> stoma h #rumbled. G)ork must be hard to find these days.H G7ou #onna hold me another two years* manD 2 told you. "lay was mul hed when 2 found him.H The Ja k lin#ered on my breath* knew they ould smell it too. G!runk. )anderin# to work in the dead of ni#ht lookin# for odd EobsD 2 don>t buy it* !ennis.H 8at 'ss sat down and drummed his pud#y fin#ers on the table. GBein# a drunk di(or ee ain>t a rime in 3ississippi if 2 re all.H That must of stirred some pity. 5e handed me a i#arette* lit it. Three minutes later they pulled the plu#. 2 was Eust a middle a#ed* burnt out* e61 on moppin> shit and puke anyhow. 2>d Eoined the rank of -obodies* a whole slew of worthless souls li(in> under#round. @ike them blue fellers in Time 3a hineClike the sad fellers hun hed o(er #reasy Reuben sammies at the dinner bar on Sunday afternoons. 2t>s hard to wat h Aem hat up waitresses with names like: 8lo* Blan h* and 3au(e. They ain>t #ot nothin>. 'nd 2 had less. )hen 2 stamped out the i#arette ashes sparked bri#ht as the sun. Butt* shit man. Bu ky !ennis didn>t spark like that no more. O S SFuattin# under my one* offee stained lamp* 2 loaded 5arriet>s si61round ylinders with .;; aliber ustom hollow powder balls. 7ou see* 5arriet was an &S;S "olt Per ussion 'rmy Re(ol(er* so 2 ast my own bullets and powdered ba#s to stuff down the hambers with a leather flask. 2 said me a 5ail 3ary for ea h round. -amed Aem too* after my folks* my dau#hters* 3rs. Tubman of ourse* and "lay. 7eah* "lay di ked me Eust about e(ery damn day* and was #rade ' for asshole to bootCbut he paid my rent* sto ked my Afrid#e* and earned me an honest keep. 3y sil(er 4erney 5i#h "lass Rin# twinkled as 2 polished her. 'nd 2 kissed 3ama>s birthstone. G3ama* look at your boy now.H !idn>t ha(e no #arli * so 2 substituted #arli lo(es for some #arli sau e from Benny "hon#>s -oodle 5ut. "hon#>s #a(e me the burpin> turds fier e* but damn ould they fried sFuid

#ood. 2 supposed albino* mid#et (ampires didn>t di# sFuid1#arli * neitherD 't least they didn>t in the !ra ula pi tures. 3y phone ran# off the hook. Sheriff>s offi e. 2 i#nored it while 2 pumped #arli sau e into a handful of ondoms and water balloons. 2 sure didn>t need Aem* know what 2 meanD 2>d #ained about ei#ht pounds* so sFuee0in# into my best orduroys was like tryin# to fit my di k into a bottle of 7oohoo. 3y 2talian boots didn>t fit ri#ht either. But when those bree hes snu##led up a#ainst my assD 5ell* 2 looked #ood* babe. Bu ky !. sure wasn>t #oin# shabby to his funeral. 5ope @loyd #ets a maria hi band with yellow tu6edos. 5oped that if 2 did die my e6>d be there with the #irls. @et Aem see their dad did somethin> well. @et Aem see. 2 didn>t take no #uff. -ot from man or the !e(il>s mid#et blood1su ker. O = Before dawn* somewhere in the sti ks* a lone rooster lamented all the hi kens other #ettin# fired. By the soundin# of the o k>s row* 2 knew my time>d ome. So* 2 mana#ed to shimmy throu#h the first twenty feet of 5ershall )e6ford>s air onditionin# du t until it widened enou#h to shuffle on my knees. 5arriet at the ready* 2 flashed my li#ht into the shadowy* sil(er orridor. GGot ha now* buddy boy.H 3y (oi e re(erberated. )hat better way to #rab a sna k than skitter abo(e while folks make in the Eohn. Sure* "lay bou#ht it at the pool and Re(erend "roon in the Sauna* but 4ampy ertainly had his way with them fourteen boys in the la(atory. 4iolet* #lass1spe kled insulation bedded the rawlspa e. 2 minded my mouth* but my hands it hed. The sten h of fish stew and dun# lun# to the wooden panelin#. The little bastard wasn>t dan#lin#. G7eah*H 2 muttered and #a##ed a bit* steppin# o(er a hunk of #nawed heel. "lay>s other foot no doubt* #ooey red #elatine on an o(ersi0ed* hewed1up pen il. G)here the hell are you* 4ampyDH 2 whispered* flashli#ht illuminatin# the po kets of darkness in the eilin#. ' hissin#* whee0in# sound e hoed in the rafters. GThere you are.H 5arriet>s hammer li ked ba k with the tou h of my thumb. 2 readied a pit h* #rippin# one of my #arli sau e balloons. The reature didn>t stir in the artifi ial li#ht. Snorin#* hubby* and thirst slated by the Eui y meat of #ood folks. 2t ro ked ba kwards with white* webby win#s hea(in# up and down* their leatherin# pinions pumpin#. )ide1set eyes were sealed shut and its fan#ed mouth blubbered as it

e6haled rotten breath. 2 aimed arefully. GPea e out* babe.H "li k. "la k. Ban#L SFuare throu#h the eyes with a flash of fiery powder. The py#my erupted from its unholy slumber* head wound #ushin# bla k* inky fluid. 4ampires don>t drop that easy. 2 wound up a fastball but hoked. Stron#* #narly laws tore my orduroys like tissue paper and ripped for my meatballs. 2 stru k ba k* burstin# the #arli balloon o(er its toothy maw. Purple fire blasted* li kin# my beard and eyebrows. G7o*H 2 shouted at the top of my lun#s* holdin> ti#ht to my meat and (e##ies. G7ou #o for a man>s ta kle. 7ou #et burnedLH 2 planted two more slu#s and hurled another balloon. 2t dod#ed* Fui k as a whip and s rat hed up the wall like a o kroa h. G)here the hellDH 2 mouthed* flashli#ht beam Eumpin# from shadow to shadow. GGone.H The whispery patter of ink dabbled my shoulders from the eilin#. Shit weren>t tar neither. G@ook>s like 4ampy sprun# a leak.H Gun smoke and sulfurous (iolet steam pumped out of the #ap in the room. 2 ed#ed onto the support beams* slidin# o(er the pool and bubblin# hot tub. G)hy the 5ell do you smell like fishDH 2 asked myself. Spidery fin#ers sna##ed my ankle. Splinters raked my fa e* lod#in# into my musta hed as the (ampire pulled me ba k into his a(e and down into the aluminum air du t. )ed#ed like sardines* the two of us wrestled* sFueakin# into the tube until we busted a eilin# #rate. )e splashed into the handi apped toilet bowl* rashed throu#h the stall door. 5arriet slid alon# the wet linoleum and my last balloon e6ploded in the sink. The rot hety fiend hobbled towards me* hissin# broken words: G3anu(al haka kishik isis murshturshLH The (ampire s ree hed* a hoir of demons tearin# from its unholy throat. 2 faded left. 8aded ri#ht. 'nd #a(e Aim the fi(e fin#ered Bui k. 4ampy o ked its battered head and sneered. G'shaka 3anu(al* an#lish ek )aheeLH 2 #rabbed Aim* perfe t headlo k* and bashed his u#ly ass mu# into the sink maybe fi(e times. G-o speaketh bullshit* hombre. Eat por elainLH Sharp pain rippled down my le# and into my toes. Broken ankleCbad too. 3y foot swelled up like a honeydew* metatarsals shiftin# in bruised meat. @imp in my arms* 2 dropped the py#my with a splash and rea hed for the spinnin# re(ol(er. Slippin# a ross the floor 2 snat hed it. G@i#hts out you son of aC.H

4ampy rasped* beatin# its si kly win#s towards the pool. !i00iness swept o(er me as 2 hobbled after him. Emer#in#* The pool #lowed* sparklin# under a sin#le sli(er of dayli#ht. G)here you atDH The e ho arried into the (aulted eilin#. Sharp teeth s raped my skull* rippin# a #ood portion from my s alp as the hellish beat of win#s lifted my heels from the floor. Blood dripped into my eyes. The rimson urtain dropped wet and hot. 3y whole life flooded o(er me* drownin# my lun#s* it burned like hlorine. Bu ky !ennis was pin hed. Pin hed and flushedC(anishin# from the world like a whirlin# turd. 5ardly a memory. ' muffled (oi e drew out into a faint e ho. GGood mornin#DH 2t was 8ather @ouis. Then the Rabbi ou#hed. G5elloLH Sounded like he was ya kin> up a bone. G'nyone hereDH The (ampire #rinned ruelly. GThok RabbaLH 2>ll be damned if that blood1su kin#* man1eatin#* bat1fu ker was #onna ha(e his way with a holy man. Time to owboy up. 2 ki ked the bastard* kno kin# his flappin# win# rooked and we both splashed into the pool. Ghastly rimson li#ht illuminated water. 2 hoked* spittin> teeth and #aspin#. Bla k fin#ernails raked my shoulder* di##in# throu#h my ribs* e6plorin# my Fueasy insides for my beatin# heart. 5is slender* pale ton#ue li ked my nose with demoni deli#ht. @osin# ons iousness 2 spied the bubblin# hot tub. G"an you swim* su kerD "an you swimLDH Bear hu##in# the monster* 2 leapt* plun#in# into the ripplin# water. 'nd damn* babe* you ain>t ne(er seen a splash like that. The water (apori0ed and the blast ame with su h in redible for e* 9ld 8aithful>d be put to shame. Purple flames s reamed from the rim as steam blasted upwards* plasterin# me three stories into the air. 'nd when 2 ame downD 2 landed sFuare in a hot tub of warm* purple #oop and slippery #unk. There weren>t nothin> left of the bat but a artload of (ampire soup. To be honest 2 didn>t #et out ri#ht away. 2 sat* stewed* and bled like a stu k du k in a ro kpot. GBu kyDH 8ather @ouis and Rabbi )einenbaum stood in towels with on erned looks. G8ather* Rabbi*H 2 said* still out of breath. G)hat aKwhat in the worldDH G're you all ri#ht* sonDH They looked like pi#eons* bobbin# their heads all on erned like.

!idn>t ha(e words for them* Eust a thou#ht that 2 shared. GThanks for the blessin#.H O &% "o(ered in annibal* (ampire and nursin# a sore ankle* 2 hobbled home. The e(i tion noti e taped onto the doorframe of room &$ of Eddie Pea o k>s Roadside 2nn didn>t help my mood. Three strikes* man. 2 mean* sure. 2>d done a ser(i e for the #ood folks at 5ershall* but louds didn>t part and there weren>t no hoir of fat bellied herubs strummin# Ri kenba kers. The phone ran# off the hook. 9(er and o(er. Sheriff )ade* 2 was sure. 2 rumma#ed throu#h my shithole room and olle ted my thin#s. )arm Bud went down smooth* 5ell e(en the beans tasted like nature>s honey. 3y life weren>t mu h different from a Ei00 stain. 'nd about fifty rin#s in* 2 me enou#h. G7eahL Shit* dude. Bu k hereLH G!addyDH Two sweet (oi es ooed from the other side. G71yeah* babies.H Tears welled as 2 heard their #i##les e ho a thousand miles into my heart. G7eah* sweeties. 2t>s !addy.H 'nd 2>ll tell ya* it weren>t no hoir of an#els. But* hell. 'n#les ain>t #ot nothin> on my #irls. *****

!UDDY( BLOODY !IDNIGHT

O & Got a dumbass* ho# shit* 5allmark ard from Sally today. 2t tore me up somethin> fier e Eust seein# her damn name in printCink smud#es too. The messa#e wasn>t (ery profound either. 9ne of them* G5ope your life ain>t shit ause mine>s Eust fine*H sort of letters. 2 don>t know why she>d e(en send it. Probably some B. S. self1impro(ement assi#nment to make her feel better about lettin> me down. To think 2 e(er thou#ht 2>d hit a home run... Tou#h ro ks* babe. Bu ky !ennis had himself a atfish to at h and nothin> on God>s #reen earth or the de(il>s burnin> basement was #onna yank that from me. So* 2 tossed the yellow en(elope in the ri k and strolled down to !elmar>s Bait -. Ta kle Shoppe* shirt stu k to my ba k* hops dishe(eled* and the handlebar Asta he twit hin> for a new

#lob of wa6. 8elt like hell* honestly. But the bir h trees swun# their bespe kled limbs la0ily abo(e me and the #litter of li#htnin# bu#s lit up the twili#ht sky o(er -at he0* 3ississippi. Si#ht like that really makes a man feel small. But* hell* small ain>t always as bad as people make it. 's 2 rounded the bend on the old trail* a ri ket symphony fiddled their miniature hearts out. See* 2>d always lo(ed fishin> and all those submer#ed roots from the rainy season left po kets of mud holes* all stuffed to the brim with whiskered fish. 'nd boy* wasn>t &=S$ a wet year for the #ood folks of 4erney "ounty. ' hefty* bald feller at the tru k stop two miles ba k told me !elmar>s was the pla e for bait Cni#ht rawlers the si0e of your wan#* babe. 'nd after Sally>d himed in* hell* 2 fi#ured 2 needed me a breather. The s reen door swun# open on a sin#le rusty hin#e. Skeeters bu00ed up a storm around the si00ilin> por h li#ht. !elmar>s leaned (iolently to the ri#ht* the sha k>s foundation sinkin# into the ri(erbank. Jeepin# my balan e alon# the wooden planks wasn>t easy. G7ou>ll ha(e to wat h your step* son. She>s sinkin# faster these days.H ' one le##ed man tapped his ri kety rut h a#ainst the table. 5is fa e wrinkled when he spoke* dark and #narled as 'labama lay. 5e s rat hed his s ruffy* white whiskers. 'nd 2>ll be damned if that smile ne(er left his fa e. Gospel musi played out of the bo6y* &=;%s radio. The old man ro ked in his hipped wi ker hair and tapped his one #ood le#. G!on>t mind the musi * now.H 5e turned it down with a roll of his bi# toe. GJust a little soul in the e(enin> time.H G2t don>t bother me at all* sir. 7ou !elmarDH 2 liked him immediately* somethin> about that smooth smile. "ool as water. GPretty soon you>ll be fishin> for mullet out the window* thou#h.H !elmar lau#hed deep and rela6ed ba k into his hundred year old ro ker. G7essir* son. This here sha k of mine>s been sinkin> a lot of years* but she ne(er #i(es way. Sure must be tearin> up that de(il. But this here>s a #ood foundation.H !elmar smiled warmly and 2>ll be damned if 2 didn>t feel like 2>d known him for years. G2 hear you>re the man to see about worms.H 2 browsed the dusty shel(es. They were sto kpiled with anned food* and dusty Ears of oli(es* arti hokes* and a whole slew of fishin> ta kle and fly #ear. 9ld stuff. Thirties* maybe forties. G)ell* that>s what they tell me. 7ou lookin> to #et in a midni#ht astDH G8i#ured 2>d pit h a amp way out by the flooded bank. @ots of mud out there* #ood for

atfish.H 2 stopped and took in a breath. G8ind me a little Fuiet* maybe.H 's we talked* the old man pro ured a moist* wooden rate. "rawlers wri##led in the bla k soil. G?uiet>s a fine thin#* son. 7ou>ll find we #ot a whole lot of it out here*H he said. G)hat is it you #ot drummin> in those ears that brin#s you to -at he0 Tra eDH G)ell* 2 ain>t one to kiss and tell. But* it has to do with lots of tellin> and less of the kissin>.H GGot yourself a woman pullin> on those heart strin#sDH The old man s ooped the earth #ently and pla ed the worms in a tin. G5ow>s thatDH 2 Eust wanted her out of my mind* you know what 2 meanD Gotta #et alon# with life and be. E(en that sweet feller had my bad side brewin#. G2 #ot me one #ood le# and 2>m old as the 3ississippiCbut 2 ain>t blind.H 2 didn>t reply. 2 didn>t ha(e anythin# to say. G)ell* you knowDH he ooed* G)hate(er>s #ot you torn up. Just remember it all works out fine. 7ou take these worms and sit by the ri(er. She>ll sin# those sorrows away dire tly. @ordy* she will.H G5ow mu hDH 2 thumbed open my wallet* had nine dollars and a Ean#le of han#e. Times were tou#h as tin. 3y A<= "har#er still lan#uished in the poli e impound. 'nd those days* 2 drifted from one motel to the ne6tChaulin> my bony ass by foot* ferry* and bus all o(er 4erney "ounty. 9dd Eobs. G2 pay my way. 5ow mu h* old timerDH G8or the wormsD Son* worms ome from God>s earth.H !elmar ro ked ba k in his hair and turned up the old radio. !arn pretty musi too: have a right to the Tree o) Li)e+ Lord 2es#s said he died, he died and have a right to the Tree o) Li)e$ 3, that sweet Tree o) Li)e$' 5ummin# to the musi with a wide ass smile* the old man smirked. GGod>s earth* son. 5e don>t har#e a dime. 'nd 2 ain>t about to either.H 2 took the worms and rattled a bo6 of "ra ker Ja ks. GThese belon# to God too thenDH G-ope*H he said. GThose>ll run ya forty fi(e ents.H O $ The kids s ree hed into the dusty lot* spillin# out of the soft1topped* red Jeep like a youn# and stupid pla#ue upon the land. ' ouple of #irls with sorority letters* two #uys. En#ine still hummin#* the dri(er hopped out and poked a mo kin> fin#er my way. G5ey* 3ike* he k out the lo als*H he said* sneerin# with a sla k1Eaw. Jo key Boy wore the

Ini(ersity of 3ississippi olors and a ponytail. GThink his folks were ousinsDH 3ike sFuawked* eyes shifty. 5is o(erbite was distra tin# but he had the build of a lineman. 7eah* Rebels football was written all o(er himCbi# letters too. Ba k in my day 2>d ha(e #otten torn up tryin> to pull a blit0 under 3ike>s wat h. G7ou didn>tLH Pony Tail lau#hed it up. GEw* Re##ie. !on>t be meanLH s offed the utesy* blonde. But she still #a(e me the stink eye. GThere aren>t other people sharin# the ampsite ri#htDH 5er urly hair boun ed ba k and forth as she helped Re##ie unload the ar. GSusan* help me with the tent.H Susan was a redheadCfre kles and all. 2 had a thin# for redheads. Good lookin> ones were rare as a winter rose. Jnow what 2 meanD Sure* you #ot your few assorted Red 5otties. But most of them look like they>d been beaten fier e with a strawberry #olf lub. 2 played it ool and #ot a Fui k peek at her ba ksideClike two Geor#ia pea hes* babe. 'nd she had her a ti#ht* little body to mat h. Pan#s of #uilt* a#e* and a need to breed splashed o(er me dry as delousin# powder. She ouldn>t ha(e been more than twenty* yet there 2 was #awkin> like a slea0e. )hen did 2 #et so damn oldD G)hy don>t you take a pi ture* buddyDH 3ike stared me down like a bob at. 2 played it ool as 2 ould* but man ali(e was it sure like #ettin> so ked in the fa e by a prea her. G7>all stayin> at the ampsite by the ri(er orDH G3aybe.H Blondie helped Re##ie unload the ooler. G're youDH G-o* sir. 2>ll mosey up stream and hit the mud banks.H !amn kids Eust #rinned* hammin> up the so##y* sorry misfortune of old Bu ky !. GSay* there>s #ood fishin> this time of year if you>re lookin> to ast.H Red Susie>s lus ious bounty kept on burstin# from her yellow tube top. Soft* fair skin #limmered in the twili#ht* beads of sweat drippin# down her lea(a#e like #litterin# #ems. 2 wished 2 hadn>t lost my lu ky a(iators. 3odern man>s mira le method for s opin> the breasts of an attra ti(e woman laid in the se rets of I4 oated and tinted #lass. Shit man* time was runnin# out. 5ell* if 2 did the math* 2>d ha(e whatD Twenty years* topsD 2 smoked* drank* ate fried food like a foolChadn>t e(en been #ettin# any bedroom ardio. S opin> olle#e tots was Eust about all 2 had left. )ithout e(en a knowled#in# that 2>d spoken* Re##ie and 3ike strapped on their pa ks and made down the ampsite trail. G@et>s #o* #irls.H

GThanks* mister*H said Susie with a smile. G7eah. Thanks.H Blondie hortled and they all disappeared throu#h the attails and stit h #rass. 2 heard lau#hin# for a #ood amount of time while 2 stood in the empty lot. The sun soon fell asleep and !elmar>s last lantern #ot huffed out. The neon 9pen si#n fli kered dark. 'nd so* 2 de ided to mosey on. O : Ba k in A-am we fished a lot. 't least* in my unit we did. 7ep* if you weren>t on patrol you sat your ass ri(erside with one of the ompany and waited for nibbles. E(en after the muddiest* bloodiest days you>d find us su kin> old* foamin> brew and huffin> #anEa with a rod and reel. The weed ne(er almed my ner(es but 2>d be lyin> if 2 told you fishin> didn>t. 2 waded into the loudy* brown water up to my knees in my ski((ies. The bait wri##led on the hook as 2 ast my line into the root1wo(en mud bank of the 3ississippi. 3y only li#ht was the ra klin# ampfire beside my pup tent. The hot* dewy air filled my lun#s and my shoulders went limp. 2 stood for hours* lettin> my trouble li k away with the reel* dreamin> of those whiskered atfish #lidin# below. ' woman an bob sideways in your mind for years before you finally ri#ht yourself. 'nd in that one moment* probably the only moment that 2 ould learly remember* Sally didn>t e6ist at all. The reel ti ked. G)hat ha(e we #ot hereDH 2 whispered to myself. 2 sloshed throu#h* up to my torso* areful not to spook Aim. The line shook and the bobber leapt up out of the water like a bree hin# whale. GGot yaLH 2 hooted. Bi# one too* twenty in her maybe* but he fou#ht like a fifty. 2 reeled and the line 0ipped and san#. 'nd Eust as 2 #ot him within four feet or so* a stron# tu# pulled me under. 2 splashed up. G!amn*H 2 hu kled* but it wasn>t funny. The line went ri#id and pulled me deeper. 2 tu##ed hard. 3y Popeye forearms burned. But whate(er wrestled me on the other end of that line was a whole lot stron#er. G"ome on now* you son of aC.H The line snapped and my momentum plun#ed me forward strai#ht into a tree. The water whirled and bubbled. Then my monster was #one. 2 sat by the fire* dryin> my so ks* soppin# to the bone* and s arfin# an an ient bo6 of "ra ker Ja ks. 2t weren>t mu h* but a bite>s a bite on the bayou. 'nd before lon#* 2 found myself

fantasi0in# about that Susie #irl. 2n my mind she wore perfume and looked damn #ood bent o(er in them !aisy !>s. G3mm* mm.H 2 popped a "ra ker Ja k and shook the pri0e free. GPorky Pi# "ompass* huhD )ell alri#ht. That>s a fineC.H ' s ream shattered my fo us and "ra ker Ja ks flew e(erywhi hwhere. G)hat in the hellDH Between the hootin> and hollerin>* 2 made out mad lau#hter and whoops. "olle#e kids were funnin>. Probably hi#h as kites or drunk as skunks. Ba k in A-am* s rewin> around like that only #ot you one thin#: wa6ed. -oise at ni#ht* i#arette smokeCdead #i(eaway for a "harlie sniper it hin> to pound two in hes of lead throu#h my skull. 2 laid ba k. GThis ain>t 4ietnam*H 2 said aloud. Either way* those damn kids were ha(in> more fun than 2 e(er would a#ain. Best let Aem. So* 2 finished my Ja ks* rubbed one out and bedded down. O ; 2 woke at midni#ht. Bran hes broke* twi#s snapped* and there was splashin# in the water. "ri kets eased to sin#. @i#htnin# bu#s went dark. 'nd there wasn>t a toad>s ribbit for miles. 2 stoked the fire and looked into the trees. GSomebody helpL PleaseLH 5ere (oi e was faint in the bo#. G)ho>s thereDH 2 alled. -o answer. G5elloD "ome on* nowLH ' hilly shi(er rippled up my le#s. Silen e thundered in my ears. -o sound at all* not e(en skitterin# swamp ratsCEust an eerie stillness and the stink of a mu##y 3ississippi midni#ht. G5elpLH Susie s reamed* tumblin# out of a thorn bush* le#s and arms all ut to hell. GPleaseL PleaseLH She shook all o(er* wet with perspiration. She #ripped my pant le#s* pullin# me away* s ramblin#. G)e ha(e to #oLH G"alm down. Tell Bu ky what>s what* #irl.H 2 tried to pi k her up but she fou#ht me* wri##lin> like a fish. G-o* no. -9. -9. -o.H G2 #ot ha* now. "ome on. 7ou>re alri#ht.H 8ear welled in my belly and bubbled up into my spee h. G)1we>re alri#ht.H GThey>re dead. She>s in the water. She>s really in the waterLH G)hoDH Susie>d ob(iously #one off the deep end. That or she was tuned to a radio that weren>t broad astin#. G2 don>t know. The old woman. She>s in the water. Re##ie>s deadLH Susie lawed at my

shirt* sprin#in# buttons. G)e #otta #o* ome on. )e #otta #oLH Tears fell like rain drops and her makeup ran until her fa e looked like har oal. G)hat about the othersD They dead tooDH 's 2 spoke we hurried o(er to my amp. 8ire still burned. That was #ood. But 2 ouldn>t find my knapsa k. G2 don>t know*H she hoked out. G2 heardK2 heard @u y s reamin#.H G@u y>s the blonde*H 2 said. G)hatDH Susie yelled* slappin# my shoulders. G"ome on* 3isterLH 2 fished throu#h my fanny pa k* little tie dyed thin# 2 #ot in San 8ran is o. GGot it*H 2 said* relie(ed to unholster 5arriet* my .;; aliber mistress of ki k1ass. She was a ool two hundred years old* rusty* but maintained with lo(e. GSti k lose. 7ou #ot pals out there* well we ain>t lea(in> nobody behind. Got itDH Susie Eust ried* #raspin# my wrist. 2n the distan e 2 swore 2 heard a 5uey>s hopper blades uttin# the wind. 3y head throbbed and 2 snapped ba k. 3ore bran hes ra ked and 2 hurried down the bank and towards the kid>s amp. Ra in# throu#h the brush and fallen trees* the anopy si#hed and Susie tried her best to stop my e(ery step. The amp was in si#ht. The fire roared* looked like one of the tents #ot slashed and went up like a powder ke#. GPlease*H she said* shi(erin#. G2 don>t want to dieLH 2 o ked 5arriet. G@ook. 7ou know what this isD 2t>s an &S;S "olt model per ussion re(ol(er. 2t belon#ed to 5arriet Tubman. )ho knows who that wasDH Susie nodded* perple6ed. G)1where did you #et itDH G2 lifted it from a )onder )ash "ar )ash and "i(il )ar 3useum. See theseDH 2 pointed to the hambers. GThese are si6 reasons why you don>t need to worry none. A"ause whate(er the hell is on the business end of theseCwell* they ain>t #oin> to the prom* babe.H Susie nodded a#ain. Bra(e #irl after all* ool as an i eber#. G7ou #oodD Be ause 2 need you.H 2 looked her sFuare in those blue eyes. GStay ri#ht here and wat h my ass. 2>m #onna he k thin#s out and see if we an>t find your friends.H 2 used my trainin# to enter the amp without sound. 2 in hed throu#h the lea(es like an 'pa he. 2f some oked up* psy ho swamp lady was out kno kin> off oeds* she>d ne(er know what hit her. 5ooahL The heat blistered* hun#ry for the dry tree limbs that laid hapha0ardly around the ampsite.

'n iron kettle swun# la0ily from two metal posts* but there weren>t no #rub. 2 ed#ed towards the remainin# tent. Ripper was torn lean off and a streak of #ore painted the side. 2 ouldn>t see past the smoke* but somethin# mo(ed on the inside. G7>all ome out or 2 start shootin>.H 2 aimed for the smoky portal* pokin# the barrel throu#h the flutterin# tent door. But there weren>t no answer. '#ainst my better Eud#ment 2 rept in and at the far end of the tent floundered a human heart* pulsin# amidst a Fui(erin# pile of wet entrails. @i(er* spleen* lun#sCe(ery or#an of the damn body throbbedCstill ali(e. GJesus 5oudini "hrist.H 2 stumbled from the tent* narrowly a(oidin# the bla0in# rin# of fire. Sharp points du# into my palms. 2 thou#ht they were ro ks* but when 2 looked down 2 saw bloody teeth* heaped into i(ory piles. G)hat is itDH Susie shambled from the bushes. Before 2 answered we heard a man s reamin# in a#ony* be##in# for someoneCor somethin# Cto stop. )e ran towards the ri(erbed as the fire onsumed the amp behind us. The woods were dead. -o mosFuitoes. 'nd somewhere* way off in the distan e* faint whispers and the smell of roastin# flesh smoked like a demon>s ookout. O Q The #reen ri(er stirred and a ri kety wooden do k bobbed in the urrent ten yards onto the water. 2f it weren>t for the burnin# amp there>s no way we>d see throu#h the milky darkness. -o moon* no stars* not e(en shimmerin# swamp #ases from the marsh would>(e lit our way. Susie>s pink hand was bolted to my ri#ht le#* #rippin# me like a #orilla. 2 held my pistol steady* eye fi6ed down the iron si#ht as my feet planted on the wobbly do k. Somethin# floated in the water* a brown lump. G7ou hear anythin#DH 2 asked Susie. She didn>t answer as she wiped away two strawberry lo ks that had fallen from a pink s run hie. 2 ed#ed out onto the do k and the water sloshed beneath the planks. G!1do you see anyoneDH Susie whispered. The water went still as bla k tar* but a ross the ri(er 2 saw mo(ement on the bank. Shadowy and obs ured by the ni#ht* a #aunt fi#ure stooped amidst the reeds. GShit* man.H 2 was startled*

spooked by the u#ly* tattered lothin# and pale skin. 3uddy* nappy hair hun# from the fa e like a #rim* weddin# (eil. G5ey youLH 2 shouted. G2 see youLH G)1what is itDH Susie stamped her feet in pla e* #lan in# ba k at the burnin# amp and a ross the ri(er. Then* before 2 ould answer* one of the boys e6ploded from the water* soppin# and pani ked. The sho k nearly sent me sailin#* but 2 mana#ed to #rab the kid and haul him in. G5elpLH he ried* #aspin# and rawlin# into the wooden blanks. 2t wasn>t Atil 2 pulled him halfway to shore that 2 noti ed the blood spurtin# from his footless ankles like a busted fire hydrant. 5is wrists limped up. Susie damn near passed out at the si#ht of it. 2 ripped my slee(es and stit hed a makeshift tourniFuet to stop the bleedin#. 3ike was da0ed* eyes rolled ba k* body in sho k. 5is flesh was torn at the shins* hiped and ripped like he>d stepped into a bear trap. ' ross the ri(er the ri kety fi#ure wasn>t in the reeds. That spooked me too* but there weren>t no time for it. G5old on* dude. 7ou>re #ood.H 2 tied him off lean and looked to the amp. GSusie* #o on and #et a bran h and li#ht her up. )e>(e #ot to auteri0e him ri#ht Fui k.H Susie didn>t hesitate* not e(en for a wink. She rushed up the hill and brou#ht ba k a bran h* fire li kin>. G-ow* this>ll pin h* ompadre. But it>ll pat h you up.H 2 upped my hands and tossed water onto the wounds before toastin> him. GReadyDH 3ike #rima ed* hompin# his bottom lip. 2 drew the flame near his wet stumpsB they si00led and popped. The #ory flesh ooked* smokin# like @ouisiana hotlinks and somewhere abo(e me* 2 thou#ht 2 heard that damn 5uey a#ain. The noise drummed my ears. G7ou wat hin> the ri(er or whatD 2 don>t want some 4" pe kerwood in a patrol boat poppin> shots at me*H 2 said* eyein# the dark hori0on. )here was the damn 5uey. 2 heard it lear as Johnny "ash>s steel #uitar. G)at h my si6* God damn itLH Susie didn>t bud#e. Typi al youn#blood. -o sense out in the bush. G2 said wat h my si6* Pri(ate. )e>(e #ot to #et this bastard to 3edi(a .H Then 2 heard it. "harlie patrol boat* en#ine purrin# like a 7okohama 3ama. G)hat are you talkin# aboutDH Susie ried out* Earrin# somethin# loose in my mind.

Before 2 answered* the ri(er stirred behind me. 5ard to make out* but 2 saw a murky shadow bubble up from the #loom. GShitLH 2 howled as an ei#ht1foot #ator slid up the bank with a #hastly* #apin# mouth of teeth. Green* leathery hide rolled o(er my le#s and stubby laws du# into my al(es* bone deep. "hunks of wri##lin# pink flesh spilled from the #ator>s mouth and before takin# a bite of meCit ha ked up a half di#ested* slime1ridden foot. Jaws snapped like toothy ymbals. "laws dred#ed throu#h the bla k mud. The #ator mo(ed faster than 2 ould and #ot a firm #rip on my toes. GSon of a bit hLH The bastard nipped my three smallest lean off and kept on omin#* thirst slate for the blood of Bu ky !ennis. )ith a shaky hand 2 steered 5arriet>s hea(y* ebony butt and fired. The ra k of the per ussion ap shook the trees and smoke flooded the ri(erbank like a death fo#. ' sti ky* hot splatter of brain and teeth sprayed my fa e. The #ator>s skull split like a rotten Ea k o> lantern and Susie>s (oi e went a mute as a mime. She ro ked in the mud* radlin# 3ike>s limp and pale head. G5e>s dead.H 8a(orin# my #ood foot* 2 hobbled into a thi ket of bushy attails. The ni#ht smelled like la(ender too* li ori e* and ooked pork. GGet up and mo(e*H 2 said* pushin# on. G"an>t sa(e him. But you still #ot your #al pal out there. 7ou #ot itD 7ou fu kin> listenin> to meDH She nodded. G-ow* let>s #et the hell out of !od#e.H O < 5ip deep in The Shit* 2 he ked my spinnin# hambers: fi(e shots and one pistol butt left to wa6 that nappy bit h sFuattin> in the reeds. Blood stains soaked my shredded denim. The milky* bla k mu k of -at he0 Tra e lun# to my len hed fists like tar. 2>d seen worse ni#hts in 4ietnam. 5ad the toes on my left foot ba k then* but 2>d seen worse. Starless ni#hts like that were lonely as the surfa e of the moon. Espe ially when you>re waitin> on E(a . )hen Susie>s friend @u y s reamed for help* e hoin# and distant amon# the willow ypress trees. )ell* it weren>t the only time 2>d heard some poor son of a bit h lost and dyin# in the dark. G)hat were you talkin# about ba k thereDH Susie said* alm and e(en. G@ook* we>ll #o ba k for his body. But we>(e #ot to se ure the perimeter*H 2 told her

strai#ht. GThat>s what 2>m talkin# about. 're you wha ked* 3isterDH 2 holstered the .;; in my belt and took bi# helpin#s of wet mud into my fists. 2t felt #ood on my arms* ool and earthy. Smooth as butter. G!o you e(en know where you areDH she said* mo kin#ly. Sad thin# was* sometimes 2 did and sometimes 2 didn>t. 2t ain>t an easy thin# to e6plain war to folks that>d ne(er seen itCThe Shit. -o sense to it. The Shit* that is. 2t>s more a state of mind than a pla e. But the pla e ertainly helps put you there* know what 2 meanD "an you think ba k to a time when you were #rippin# a slippery 31&< in the Eun#le beneath the shower of endless* whisperin# rainD 9r maybe* elbow deep in the #ra(e of a "ommie tunnel rat* flashin# spe li#hts into the eyes of a Ea ked up 4iet "on# whose wired with two pounds of plastiFue. The whole damn world shrinks to the si0e of a ta ti al helmet and the only other person you #ot in lifeD The #uy ne6t to youCunder his. G7eah. 2 know where we>re at*H 2 said. GThe Shit.H 2 streaked the lay o(er my fa e* maskin> my mu# but for the sparklin# whites of my eyes. G-ow* listen up. 2 need some intel. Tell me the deal. )hat in holy hell is #oin# onDH G)e wanted to see if the story was true.H Susie>s lips Fui(ered. G)hat storyDH G7ou>(e heard of @ewis and "larkD The e6plorers.H 9f ourse 2 had. G7eah* those 7ankee boys that #ot fresh with Sa aEawea.H G)ell* yes. Spe ifi ally* 3eriwether @ewis. 5e ommitted sui ide on the -at he0 Tra e* out by Grinder>s Stand se(enty miles or so from -ash(ille.H G2 fi#ured he>d be a pretty famous feller*H 2 said. G)hy>d he #o and off himselfDH G-obody knows for sure. But le#end has it he e6perien ed somethin# terrible on -at he0 Tra e road* near the )it h !an e Pi ni 'rea.H Susie kneaded the mud with her fin#ers and toes as she spoke. She absentmindedly braided her red hair* rubbin# it down with her filthy fin#ers. G)it h !an eDH GThe "ho ktaw and "hi kawa tell stories about it. The pat hes of s or hed earthCno plant life will #row there to this day.H Susie blinked and two tears streamed down her fa e. 5ollow lau#hter lattered in the woods like stones skippin# in a Fuarry. GJesus 5oudini.H 3y heart fluttered* missin> beats like a drunken Ea#les o(er band.

Susie whimpered as she ontinued the story. G2ndians told @ewis about a haunted #lade of dead #rass. They told him a o(en of old ha#s dan ed there by the li#ht of the moon and that hildren went missin#.H G'nd let me #uess. 7>all thou#ht you>d #i(e yoursel(es a #anEa tokin> s areC ampin> out at a haunted Pi ni 'rea in -at he0 Tra e -ational Park.H 2 ouldn>t belie(e what 2 was hearin#* that>s for darn tootin>. But* 2>d seen her* that ha#* reakin# in the stalks like a s are row. G)hat>s with you damn olle#e kids* anywayDH G2ts not our faultL 5ow ould the stories be trueD Stories like that aren>t true. They an>t be. They an>tLH Susie spread mud onto her sweet* fre kled lea(a#e and o(er her fa e. GBabe* if there>s one thin# 2>(e learned it>s that there ain>t no story e(er told that don>t #ot some truth in it.H 2 pi ked Susie up by the middle and brushed lea(es from her shirt. 5er body was sprin#y and youthful* soft and (ulnerable. GTruth>s in the eye of the beholder* know what 2 mean. 'nd 2ndians don>t lie about what they>(e been beholdin#. They ain>t #ot no ton#ue for it.H G)e>re #oin# to die aren>t weDH Susie>s words ame at me like a frei#ht train. Skin old* she shi(ered (iolently. G-o* we ain>t #ot time to die*H 2 said. The Porky Pi# dire tion dial on my ompass read north1west. G)e>re headed to -ash(ille. Same as 3eriwether @ewis.H G)here did you #et thatDH Susie asked. G)hatD ThisDH 2 held up the ompass. G9ld ass "ra ker Ja k bo6* babe. )hen they #a(e out useful shitCyou know* before the fu kin> temporary tattoo re(olution.H 2 sear hed my po kets for anythin# else 2 ould use: fishin# line* #randdaddy>s po ket knife* and a ro k1hard sti k of Bi# Red. 2 #a(e the #um to Susie. G"hew this. 2t>ll taste like normal and alm those ner(es.H G3isterDH She pursed her lips. G)hat>s your story* anywayDH G'in>t no story. 2>m Bu ky !ennis. 2 don>t take #uff.H O N Best way to ri# a whip trap is to use bamboo: stron#* pliable* and Fui k. )eren>t no bamboo on the bayou* so a youn#* #reen willow limb had to do. Tri k to #et a solid kill was to keep the trap under the thi k folia#e* nestled deep in a fern or a pat h of swit h #rass. Really low like* but Eust hi#h enou#h for a strike to the thi#h. ' ni e hit sent a fi(e1in h wooden spike into the

femoral artery. Pun ture himD 7ou>re #one in minutes. 2 sharpened up some twi#s with Pappy>s knife and stit hed them to the tip like shark>s teeth. 8ishin# line made for a tau#ht* in(isible tripwire. Susie and 2 set a whip trap e(ery hundred yards or so alon# a 0i#0a# pattern. )e took the harder trails too* wea(in# a ross ro ky paths* areful to keep lear of the waterfront. G@u yLH Susie alled into the ni#ht. 5er (oi e e hoed a do0en times* boun in# off the ro ky anyon that lead into the main trail of the -at he0 Tra e. G?uiet now*H 2 said. G)e>(e #ot to keep radio silen e. 'nd no i#arettes.H G!amn it* Bu ky* we don>t ha(e a radio*H Susie ried. G9r i#arettesLH G7ou want to #i(e our position awayDH Stupid kid didn>t know a damn thin#. G)e stay Fuiet and keep mo(in#.H 2 tied off more fishin# line and set a new trap. 3y fin#ers were red and swollen* my muddy arms dried up like sandpaper. G@u yLH she alled a#ain* but this timeCno e ho. G@u yLH '#ain* no e ho. GShut the hell up* SusanLH 2 o(ered her mouth. G@isten.H G2 don>t hear anythin#.H GThat>s what 2 mean.H The e hoin# ro ks fell silent. -o fro#s either. Then* from two hundred yards behind us* a whip trap tri##ered with a snap. Then another and another. SnapL "run hL ThwipL G2ts behind us*H she whispered. "ra kL G'nd in a bi# hurry.H )ithout another word we ran to the lip of the anyon. GShit. 2t>s too steepLH Susie leapt wildly from the ed#e of the liff and rolled down the slope. 2 lost si#ht of her* obs ured by the tumblin# a(alan he of pebbles and #ranite dust. 2n the impossible dark 2 saw the trees bend and fold onto themsel(es as a shadowy horror tri##ered our last trap. 8ishin# line shone like sil(er thread and 2 fired two deafenin# shots into the ni#ht. !esperate* 2 Eumped after Susie and fell hollerin# into the abyss. 's lu k would ha(e it* 2 didn>t break my damn spine* but Susie wasn>t so fortunate. 2 found her limpin# on a sprained ankle* foot bleedin# pretty bad too. The trees si#hed abo(e us but our hunter wasn>t there. Just wind and lea(es* floatin# onto us like dry* dead snow flakes. GShe>s toyin# with usLH Susie ried* shakin# o(er her busted foot.

G7eah*H 2 said* eyes fi6ed on the liff>s ed#e. GBut we>(e #ot an ed#e.H Susie o ked her head like a pu00led kitten. G)hat ed#e is thatD 7ou ra0y fu kLH Then 2 saw it. ' #litterin# sli(er of li#ht and shadow lur hed amon# the reeds and roots* whisperin# dark* ro(in# li#ht and spe tral forms. G2s thatDH ' blurry* white apparition lin#ered o(er a si kly pat h of #rass beside the main arm of -at he0 Tra e trail. 2t was a man in uniform. 5is fa e was #aunt and troubled. GThat>s 3eriwether @ewis.H Susie in hed ba kwards into my arms. @ewis ho(ered in pla e* displa in# a tan#le of weeds. 5e looked at us for a few moments then spoke. G!on>t wat h her dan e with the hildren. 2t will brin# only sorrow.H )ithout flin hin#* the #host drew a fo##y musket from his holster* pla ed the #un in his mouth and fired. Spirit smoke lit the darkness like a flare* astin# wa(erin# li#ht o(er a ruined otta#e. Stone bri ks rumbled from the walls and the dusty* rotten shin#les hun# like moss from the ollapsed rafters of the roof and eilin#. Sti ky fun#us sprun# from the foundation* and all around the empty* bla k doorway* piles of lea(es* sti ks* bones* and eroded animal skins. 8lies 0ipped around the broken ar ass of a dismembered bu k* his yellow antlers nailed to the ar h of the door. G2 don>t want to be here*H Susie said flatly. ' foul #ust (omited from the house stinkin# of some nameless putres en e. 8le ks of for#otten (ileness spe kled the ni#ht air like rooked* motionless mosFuitoes hun# on the wind like ornaments. 'nd upon loser e6amination* it appeared they were Eust that: mosFuitoes* win#less and dead. They floated in pla e* impossibly still. GSusie is that youDH @u y>s faint (oi e arried from the otta#e doorway. GSusieD 5elp me* Susie.H 2 fro0e with my nuts nailed to the floor. The tremendous dark thundered from the doorway* pit hin# midni#ht bla kness so empty 2 Fuestioned e(er knowin# the #low of a filament bulb or shine of the western sun. GBu ky* 2 an>t #o in there.H GTake my hand.H Stale air flooded my nose as 2 stepped into a dit h of obwebs and hi ken feathers. GSusieD "an you hear meDH @u y rumbled like a #on# and the shadowy doorway rippled. GSusie* help me. She>s #ot me in the basementLH

Somethin# s ree hed in the treetops. The bran hes shook. 2 let out a holler and Eumped for the otta#e* passin# throu#h the (oid. The old* inky doorway lun# to my lothes like a sli k of i y oil. 2 barreled throu#h like a blind moth bu00in# into a burnin# barn. 3y heart thumped. Then with brash* fear1swallowin# folly* 2 disappeared with Susie into the ruin. )e found oursel(es inside a pristineCand 2 mean imma ulateCreprodu tion of nineteenth entury raftsmanship. 8loral ro heted linens dressed a fully laid banFuette table and in the orner a pipin# hot* potbellied sto(e ra kled with fresh oal. ' stone stairway lead into the basement* narrow and shrouded in darkness but for a sin#le* si kly andle burnin# at the bottom. G!oor>s lo ked.H 2 smashed my shoulder into the oak and iron lat hed door* but no amount of stren#th ould e(en bud#e it. The hin#es were ast and bolted with thi k* sFuare1top nails. GShit. Pla e is buttoned up ti#hter than the 'lamo.H G)here are weDH Susie sFuee0ed me soft and supple like. GBa k in older times. 9r at least it>s made to look like as mu h.H 5arriet had two rounds left in her. 2 didn>t remember takin# the shots. GSusieD 2s that youDH @u y>s (oi e lamored up the stairs. GJesus* Bu kyC.H GShut up and wait a se ond* will yaDH ' kettle on the sto(e whistled and 2 lifted it lear of the heat. 3y nose #ot a swift rush of roasted pork from the o(en. Smelled damn #ood: honey #la0ed* walnut mash* maybe thyme* basil. GSmells #ood don>t itDH GShe>s downstairs. )1we don>t ha(e to #et her.H Susie took a few steps ba kwards. GPlease ome with me. 9kayDH 5er pani set in like somebody>d turned up the no00le on her menstrual y le and stole a Sni kers ri#ht out of her hand. 5er lea(a#e beaded wet with perspiration. 'nd damn* mon frerChe>d ha(e been hot as habanera if she weren>t ryin# and s ared. G'h* hell. Sure* we>ll res ue her* Eust let meKH Peerin# into the o(en* my words fell from my mouth like loose teeth. Two human feet basted in buttery broth* stewed in three in hes of boiled arrots. Toenails si00led and Eui ed o(er the fire. 2 shut the sto(e abruptly* tastin# my own sour ass up hu k. G)hat is itDH Susie leaned o(er my shoulder. G@et>s #o downstairs*H 2 said* and took her by the hand. The andle below dripped honey1 olored wa6 into little rusty pools. GReady* nowDH 2 pulled the hempen loop dan#lin# from the

rotten* wooden door. 's the ri kety thin# swun# open* we heard her. @u y moaned and whispered words 2 ouldn>t make out. @i#htless* 2 pulled a andle from the wall and led us into the #loom. The muddy floor #ummed up our shoes and lay walls #a(e under the wei#ht of our hands as we leaned for balan e. The basement narrowed into a ata omb>s hall. Slots in the walls were filled with tarnished po ket wat hes* antiFue eye#lasses* and them funky three pointed* olonial hats. GSusieDH @u y>s strawberry lotion and teenybopper perfume masked the sten h of a foul* stewin# permeation from in front of us. G)e>re here* darlin>.H 3y (oi e was nearly inaudible. "andle wa6 burned my fin#ertips and dried stiffly to my fin#ernails. 2 held the fli kerin# flame aloft* illuminatin# the tiny* mud1pa ked sFualler. 2t was ompletely empty but for a sin#le* sau er tub with @u y>s pink skeleton soakin# in a old bath of blood. 5er kidneys* li(er* and lower intestines bobbed in the #ory stew like apples in a barrel. Eye balls s ooped out like #elato* heart and lun#s wrapped neatly with belt si0ed strips of skin. The horror of @u y>s floatin# orpse made my worst day in 4ietnam look like an episode of @o(e Boat. G)ait* Susie. !on>tLH But Susie #ot herself too #ood of a look. She spit up a warm helpin# of mun hed s>mores all o(er my #ood foot* hea(in# yellowy hunks until her belly was empty. G@u yDH 2 Fueried at the wet skull* eyein# tufts of blonde hair knotted into her skeletal fists. But there weren>t no answer but for the lank of the door shuttin# behind us. )e spun like tops. 3y tri##er fin#er it hed. The sweat pooled. 'nd from the shroud of the ata omb* a wispy* nameless silhouette spoke with a (oi e like broken #lass. GSheKdidn>t likeKto dan e.H The ha# rasped from the darkness and @u y>s skeleton rumbled* splashin# into the bloody tub. G!o youDH Susie stumbled in mud* lawin# at the walls* fearful mad. 3y own heart leapt into my throat* beatin# on my 'dam>s apple like a pri0efi#hter poundin> for the hea(ywei#ht title. 2mpossibly fast* the rone slithered from liFuid shadow and snat hed Susie>s ankle. She sFuealed* lin#in# to the doorway* until her fake nails broke and she slid into the bla k hall. GSusieLH She was #one before my fin#er ould sFuee0e ba k 5arriet>s tri##er. Shakin# and s ared* 2 stood beside the bloody* bubblin# bathtub. 2 eyed the Fuiet (oid leadin# upstairs into the otta#e. Thin#s #ot a mite fo##y. 3y feet slipped with e(ery step and 2 swore 2 heard "harlie hatterin> o(er the radio. 2

ouldn>t find my helmet or rifle. 9n my hands and knees* 2 probed the floor* drippin# wa6 ploppin# onto the damp #round as the andle burned low. G!amn it* "hristL 8u kL Jris Jrin#le* this is Easter Bunny* o(er. !o you read* o(erD Enemy hostilesL Repeat: we ha(e enemy hostiles in se torKH )hat se tor was 2 inD 2 smelled sour noodles brewin# down the hall. 2 tasted the humidity. The hatter hummed like inse ts swirlin#* around my head. 2 swatted them* but they didn>t #i(e up. There aren>t words enou#h to des ribe the terror. The Shit had its own way. 2t swit hes off the li#ht* bends you ba kwards and pumps your ass Atil you>re batty. That and stinks. GBu ky* help meLH a youn# lady>s (oi e drummed. 4' -urseD Red "ross maybeD 8u kin> "on#. GThis is Easter Bunny. Jrin#le do you opy* o(erDH @ow on ammo* 2 sear hed the ata ombs. 7ou find stran#e stuff in A-am. !o0en dusty books all s ribbled in 8ren h* a wooden pe# le#* and a sa k full of opper rin#sCdisappointin#ly* nothin# you ould #ut a man with. Then 2 #ripped it* a weird* robust pie e. 2 pulled a ast iron flintlo k wed#ed in the muddy shelf* beneath some tattered blankets. 9ld* shitty* and e(en more obsolete than my "olt A;S hand anon* the flintlo k was dry as least. 2 powdered it up usin# one of them old horns they had ba k in older times. -o ammo thou#h. 2 rammed it full with about a dollar>s worth of ni kels and dimes. Those 4" sons of bit hes were smart and resour eful. )ell* hellCso was 2. 5ooah. GBUn sV khWn# bao #iX #iYt tWi* du ma mayL BUn sV khWn# bao #iX #iYt tWi* du ma mayLH The andle went out on the stairs* but the kit hen still #lowed. The wit h must>(e known 2 was omin#* but she didn>t e(en lay punEi sti ks. 2 shook my hair like a wet do#. GSober up*H 2 said. Bree hin# the doorway* 2 saw Susie tied to a hair with strips of pink and red ribbon. She sFuirmed and spit a#ainst the leather #a# that fasted her head to the hair. 5ere eyes were #lossy* starin# bri#ht as headli#hts at 3ike>s roasted feet. The table was set for three. G)here is sheDH 2 mouthed the words* pistols in ea h hand. 2n the mirror 2 looked like Swamp Thin#* muddy war paint o(erin# all but my peepers. Susie shifted in her seat* blinkin# wildly. G)hereDH 2 repeated silently. Susie>s muffled s ream spooked me. She ro ked and rattled the hair* kno kin# the floorboards and #esturin# with her whole* bound body towards the mirror. Glan in# ba k* 2 spied my refle tionCbut 2 wasn>t alone. The #aunt fi#ure of the -at he0

"rone sulked o(er my shoulder* fa e obs ured by lon# strands of dirty bla k hair. 5er skin hun# from her bones like loose wool* pale and spe kled with moldy spots. 'nd 2 ould taste the red* iron drippin# fin#ernails as she rea h for my throat. Spinnin# like a dradle* 2 brou#ht 5arriet>s hammer down and flooded the room with .;; smoke. But the bit h wasn>t there. G2 thou#ht you wanted to dan e* God damn itLH Plun#in# from the liFuid mirror* two ada(erous hands hoked me* sFuee0in# like a noose. @ifeless eyes of emerald #lass peered into my soul from a sallow* raisin death mask. 5er Eaw li ked open and her rotten worm1filled mouth spit the words* GGod doesn>t do the damnin#.H Eyes asunder. G2 do.H 2 #asped helplessly under her steel #rip. Shit1 aked nails du# into my soft flesh as she pulled me loser. The mirror splashed like pond water. 3y arm plun#ed inside. 2 stru##led to wrestle free. 3y le#s ki ked wildly from the mirror. 2 weren>t stron# enou#h. 'nd she pulled the rest of me throu#h* torn from world* into the whirlin# (oid. O S )hisperin# shadows dan ed in a shimmerin# rin#. 8in#ertips ombed throu#h my hair. The sensation of fallin# o(erwhelmed me despite my feet firmly set on solid #round. 3y #uts in knots* 2 losed my eyes amidst all that darkness and did somethin# 2 hadn>t done in a lon#* lon# time. 'nd 2 did it the best 2 knew how. G!amn you* you o ksu kin> rat1bastard. Get me out of this and 2 swear 2>ll shape up.H God and me* we went way ba k. 2 felt spidery hands drift o(er my body. ' soft* dry kiss ti kled my ne k. ' ton#ue like sandpaper tasted my hin. Shallow breath skipped from my throat* nearly suffo ated by her mummified perfumes. G7ou>re so handsome*H she said. GStrappin# and stron#.H But then that dried1up ha# made a mistake: she tou hed the Asta he. S rat h that. She tou hed the Asta he with ill intent. 2n the bla kness my fin#er pulled ba k strai#ht away on the flintlo k. The balst of firin# oins lit the dark and sent the wit h flounderin# throu#h the shattered. Susie kno ked her head a#ainst the sto(e and spillin# fiery oals o(er the wooden floor. The pla e au#ht like a oil ri#.

2 tu##ed Susie free of the hair and arried her to the door. G"an you walkDH 5er le#s wobbled. G71yeah*H she said* #ro##ily. The lat h Ean#led. 8u kin> thin# was lo ked and sturdy as a sailor>s boner on 3ardi Gras. 2 lined myself up for a 4erney 5i#h 8ootball blit0* but the wit h blit0ed me first. She had the stren#th of a !allas offensi(e lineman and tossed me a ross the room like an ei#ht1pound sa k of salt. 2 pistol whipped with the butt of my .;;* bashin# in her wart1ridden nose. 2t rumbled like ashy paper* lea(in# a #apin# skeletal hole. G!amn*H 2 said* liftin# ba k my fist for another #o* but 2 wasn>t fast enou#h. 8i(e ra0or1sharp nails ripped a ross my upper lip* sli in# off a tuft of my handlebar musta he. The (iolent blow lo ked me onto my ass with a thump. 2 tasted the metalli blood and au#ht a #limpse of the dama#es in a shard of broken mirror. G5oly God*H 2 said* stunned. G@ady.H 2 stru##led to form senten es. G@ady* you done fu ked up my handlebarKH -ow* its one thin# to kill a man* hop him up* and s arf him like a bu ket of hi ken. But it>s another thin# entirely to disfi#ure a Southern man>s Asta he. G'lri#ht* bit h. 'lri#htKH 2 tell ya* fire must>(e flared from my nostrils. G7ou wanna dan eD 5uhD 7ou wanna mamboD 2s that ri#htD 7ou wanna fu kin> mamboDH 5er #hastly skin urled ba k as if in(isible fin#ers pulled the orners of her undead mouth to fei#n smilin#. 5ideous* the orpse mask was a rude and terrible puppet. 2 #ripped her by one of her sa##in#* #rimy tits and sho(ed that u#ly fa e into the sto(e. 5ot oals bel hed and hair fi00led. Eyes swelled and popped. 5er skull hattered and wailed. 2 hammered shut the iron sto(e door. 9(er and o(erCopen* shut. GThis is a fun dan e* ain>t itD 7ou ha(in> fun yetD 7ou filthy* murderin> bit hL 8ire spilled onto my knu kles* but the blisterin# heat didn>t fa0e me. 2 smashed and smashed* ra kin# the wit h>s skull to white hot* smolderin# splinters until her flailin# boney le#s Eerked still. 'nd the moment she went limp* the otta#e darkened like someone>d huffed out the li#ht and we a#ain found oursel(es in the wilderness of the -at he0 Tra e. Susie and 2 shi(ered and panted amidst rainin# debris. The ruined otta#e was fallin# onto itself* rumblin# into a rin# of stony foundation. Shin#les loosened and split. Timbers #round to dust. 'nd in a swell of stael air* the house released a li(in# si#h and disinte#rated as we do(e free of the ollapse.

Susie laid sprawled o(er me. 5er heart throbbed a#ainst mine. 5er breasts hea(ed* sFuishin# my middle a#ed hest. 5er pouty lips pressed firmly a#ainst my ne k. 2>ll admit it was a hell of a time to #et frisky* but 2 sure felt it* babe. GSallyD 7ou alri#ht* #irlDH Shit* 2 thou#ht. 5er name weren>t Sally. She didn>t answer and her breathin# was weak. GSusieDH 2 talked louder* you knowD @ike she misheard me. -o answer. GShit*H 2 said* rollin# her o(er. 5er eyes #linted #reen and her fa e ontorted #rimly into a familiar smirk. GJesus 5oudini "hristLH G-o JesusL -9 JESISLH the wit h rowed throu#h Susie>s sweet lips* her body shi(erin# and fin#ers bent like meat hooks. The nails stabbed* deep* tearin# my shoulder mus les. G-9 JESISLH GThat>s enou#hLH 2 ried* slappin# Susie>s possessed body ri#ht a ross that rosie* fre kled heek. 'nd instantly* the enemy spirit dispersed. Those e(il* emerald eyes faded ba k to rystal blue. Susie pulled a#ainst my torn shirt sleepily* nu00lin# my ne k on e more. Gentle as a sprin# fawn* her eyelashes batted a#ainst me like butterflies. G're we okDH she said. 2t was my turn to be silent. Soak it in* man. So* 2 smiled and took in the moment with that beauty in my arms. Bullfro#s roaked near a tri klin# ri k out yonder and li#htnin# bu#s flittered in the tall #rass. The woods woke* the wind blew* and ool* sil(er starli#ht bathed the -at he0 Tra e* washin# lean all that un ertain dark and all that un ertain old. O = !elmar loun#ed in his hair* o(erlookin# the 3ississippi and puffin# on a orn ob pipe. 5is dark shone bri#ht in the mornin# li#ht as Susie and 2 sauntered up the bank towards the parkin# lot. G'in>t it a fine mornin>DH !elmar blew smoky rin#s. GThou#h 2 suppose e(ery mornin#>s fine somepla e.H 2 wanted to slap him too* but 2 reali0ed it was true. 2t was a fine mornin#. Sunny* fresh* and kissed with sparklin# dewChell* in A-am mornin#s were what we looked forward to. )hether

you shipped out* shaped up* off #ot off patrol* e(erythin# we knew and li(ed for re(ol(ed around that last bad day and a wake up. Susie opened the passen#er door and in(ited me in. The en#ine purred for a few minutes and we Eust sat there Fuiet like. !idn>t say a thin#. Then Susie looked o(er with those eyes* hair tussled* oran#e like the 3ississippi sun. 'nd she said* G2>ll do whate(er you want.H 2 swallowed hard. G)hatDH G'nythin# you want. 2>ll do it for you.H Susie* ed#ed loser and the leather seat sFueaked. -ow* there omes a time when a hoi e is made. 'nd 2 made it. 5ell* Susie>s apri ot ass ould ra k a rayfish and fry it tooCbut she was mi#hty youn# for an old* s ra##ily antlered bu k. G3a>am*H 2 started* sheepishly. GTo be honest a ride into town would be #ood.H 2 burned her hard. Saw it in her fa e. The adrenaline #ot to her. Passion. 2nstin ts ruled and she needed a stron# man to #i(e her the kielbasa. She opened her mouth* paused before speakin#. !on>t say it* 2 thou#ht. !on>t bullshit me like Sally did. 5ell* we didn>t e(en know ea h other for "hrist>s sake. G're you sure you don>t want anythin#DH 5er rosy ton#ue wetted her lips. 2 nodded* yes* my pe ker at full attention. G9h* thank God*H she said with a si#h. 2 sunk ba k into the passen#er seat before truly hearin# her damn response. GThank GodD )hat the hell is thatDH )hatD 2 ain>t #ood enou#h nowD Shit* Susan. 7ou Eu##lin> my stones or whatD Thank God* she says.H 'nd that was that. Susie dro(e me into town and o(ered the bill at the !enny>s. 2>ll tell ya* se6 is #ood* but a Grand SlamD Babe* y>all an>t beat a Grand1fu kin#1Slam. *****

EIDOLON
O & Told myself if 2 e(er woke up from 4ietnam* first thin# 2>d do was buy me a &=<= !od#e "har#er. Swore it on my ma* ursed it on my pa* and fi#ured 2 deser(ed it. )ith two tours ser(ed

and my lu ky ass on a plane home to Ja kson1E(ers 2nternational* 2 walked the thirty odd miles to 4erney* 3ississippi before 2 finally found me a ride. Ed>s 'uto 3an Emporium hustled ars sin e &=$; and that parti ular day he show ased my sparklin#* 4S* year1end beauty. 'nd so* with a half1 entimeter hunk of twisted shrapnel still stuffed up the swollen ra k of my ass* 2 wri##led onto leather seats and pulled my new "har#er onto I.S. ;Q. 2 bou#ht a hotel frid#e* #reen label Ja k !aniels to hristen her and sa(ed the empty bottle in the #lo(e bo6 for lu k. But that was se(enteen years a#o. Before my life tripped o(er its shoela es. Before my wan# went limpCyou know* metaphori ally. 'nd as 2 upped my last of fi(e pin#1pon# balls at the 4erney "ounty 8airC2 put it all out of my mind. A"ause if 2 didn>t toss that little white ball into that God damned #oldfish bowl* 2 weren>t ne(er #onna #et my sweet ><= out of impound. 8irst pri0e for fi(e out of fi(e balls was a ool si6 hundo* Eust enou#h to sFuare my debts and #et my !od#e the hell out. See* 2>d lost her some years ba kChad a run in with the law and a bad habit of bein> pushy. 2t>s all water under the brid#e now* but damn* did 2 need to sink that pin#1pon# ball. G7ou #onna toss or whatDH The arnie #u00led his "olt ;Q. G7eah* yeah. 2>m on entratin#*H 2 said* aressin# the i(ory orb* doin# my best to a ommodate for wind speed and humidity. G)ind ain>t ri#ht.H GThe windDH "arnie roaked. G)ho are youD GeronimoDH 2#norant fool>d ne(er been a G. 2. They tea h you thin#s* hone your shootin# and polish your form. )ind speed meant your ass in the field. !amn i(y spit1fu k. GJesus* 3ister.H G'lri#ht* bud. )at h how it>sC.H The ball parted from my hands and landed pin#in# from bowl to bowl* boun in# like a Eumpin> bean* until it ri o heted into the mud. GThat>s itKH 2 muttered* strokin# my handlebar musta he and mutton hops. G!amnit.H GTou#h ro ks* pal. 5ey* at least you win the Se ond Pri0e.H "arnie rifled throu#h a bo6 spillin# foam peanuts. G8east your eyes*H he said. GJno k yourself out. This beauty>s authenti .H 5e handed me a 45S Tape of S&lash starrin# Tom 5anks and !arryl 5anna. 2>d seen it at the pi tures. G)hat>s thisDH 2 asked* pointin# to a si#nature s ribbled onto the o(er. GSi#ned by Eu#ene @e(y. Real deal. 2 met him at a #arli festi(al in Gilroy* "alifornia.H

GEu#ene @e(y* huhDH 5is name was ir led on the ba k and e(erythin#. G)ell* son of a bit h.H 2 hun# around and sulked. 8inally* 2 de ided to hit the funnel ake art. ' feller o(erin> Johnny "ash son#s strummed his steel #uitar as sparklers lit the ba k up sin#er>s tiara. Bri#ht li#hts from the 8erris wheel twinkled like rainbow stars* shimmerin# onto the oran#e #ame1tents and astin# a warm* olorful #low o(er the happy folks at the 4erney "ounty 8air. Jids ridin# ponies tied to andy ane ribbons* eyed my funnel ake. 9ne of the #irls reminded me of my own out in 8lorida. 2 had twins* see* 3innie and 3ay* my beauties. The e6 took Aem with her in the di(or e. 'm 2 repeatin# myselfD Boy they>d a liked this little shindi#* 2 thou#ht* as fireworks popped in the Southern sky. The #irl on the pony smiled. 2 winked and sallied by. -i#ht air swept o(er me like the hush of a 5uey. 2 re lined onto a park ben h with an Ed 5erbert for 3ayor ad(ertisement. 2 snu k a swi# of Ja kie !. from my hipflask and Eust basked beneath the old hi kory tree outside ity hall on 3ar(in Street. 8unny how Fuiet it #ot in town when there was a arni(al on. The bell to Ray>s Books himed and an older* odd1feller stumbled out in a hurry. 5e #lan ed my way. 2 offered a friendly wa(e but the #uy didn>t wa(e ba k* Eust hurried into the alley between Ray>s pla e and 3ar(in>s Salty !o#. That>s ri#ht* damn street was named after him and his world famous frankfurters. Just as 2 polished off the funnel ake* 2 #ot an it h for a do#* but a sudden shout startled me. GGet ba k* heathenL 7ou an>t ha(e itLH Jo##in# around the orner 2 heard a li k and saw the sil(er flash of a swit hblade. ' tall man loaked in a bla k duster and fedora was poised to strike with a si61in h sti ker. The old man from Ray>s Books owered* #rippin# ti#htly to a leather tube. G5eyL 2 see you* assholeLH 2 shouted* thumbin# my @e(is for my po ketknife. 2 0ipped her open. GTwo tours in A-am* hombre. 5ooahLH 2 oa6ed the oward with my fin#ers. 5is swit hblade stared darkly beneath his hat* then strikeL @ike a pit (iper* he pier ed the old man>s ribs twi e and slashed him a ross the belly. GJesus 5oudini*H 2 #asped. Before 2 sFuared myself* Swit hblade had already s aled a fire1 ladder. )rithin# in the on rete* the old man rasped. G)1wait. !1don>t #o.H Blood pooled* soakin# his kaki suit and alli#ator shoes.

G)hat>s you>re name* manD 2 #otta all you an ambulan e. Get the poli e out here.H 3y knees slid into the red pool and 2 immediately laid down a hundred and ei#hty pounds of pressure onto the wound. G5eyLH 2 ried. G)e>(e #ot a man down o(er hereLH GShhh. -1not important*H he ou#hed. The old man released the leather tube from his #rip. Slippery* warm life emptied onto my Eeans. GE(oLH ' sli k youn#ster with a milky white bu00 ut pushed me aside. G2saa KH E(o whispered* but his breath ran out. 2>d seen it all before* when the lun#s deflated ompletely. 2n the 'rmy we>d wonder whi h end of a ompass a man>s soul wound up. )as it a si#h of relief or was it a#onyD GE(oDH 2saa the kid replied with a Fui(erin# lip. Tears welled* but didn>t fall. 5e Eust #rima ed and turned to me. G@ea(e.H G2saa is itD !ude* your bud was Eust atta ked. )e #otta rin# the authorities.H ?uiet ra#e washed o(er the albino>s fa e turnin# his pasty omple6ion red as a baboon>s ass. G2>ll take are of itLH Eyes narrow* 2saa >s bellow summoned two men from the still runnin# ar. 5e paused* stru##lin#. G2>m sorry. Thank you. 7ou an lea(e. )e>ll take are of it.H 3en bumped me aside. 'nd not lon# after* 2 found myself wanderin# home alon# 3ar(in Street* drunk as a sailor su kin> off a skunk. Then it hit me. The leather tubeL Shit* 2 had it tu ked under my sweaty ass arm. 2 kno ked o(er the trash bin outside of the Shipley !onuts and a mess of #ooey fritters spilled e(erywhi hway. 2 felt my boots slide* but the pa(ement* they 2 didn>t feel omin> at all. 2 bit the dust and rolled into the alley like a whiped out surfer. -o one was there. E(o and his boys were #one with the wind and the street>d been mopped lean* tra eless as a Ei00 sFuirt in your piMa olada. O $ 2 woke feelin# like the entire western 3ississippi 5i#hway Patrol was hasin# me. 9r at least it sounded like how it mi#ht in the pi tures. 3y nei#hbor li ked his banEo like an ornery 90ark and no matter how mu h 2 wrestled with my sheets 2 Eust ouldn>t #et ba k to dreamin#. -ei#hbor>s name was Ted 8ord. 5e had a kna k for fast plu kin#. But 2>ll be damned if 2 didn>t want to kno k his blo k off after a ni#ht of hea(y drinkin#. The Rainbow menthol lit smooth and 2 took a dra# so hard the filter ra kled. 2 lit another

and washed my mouth out with a flat Bud. G2>(e #ot to take a shit*H 2 said* tryin# to rub the heada he out of my ears. )ide1eyed* 2 looked myself o(er in my se ond1hand (anity mirror. G"hrist and his 'postles.H 3irrors eased bein> #entle on my self1esteem in the mid &=N%s. The only time 2 e(er used one was when 2 sha(ed. But why botherD 3y hops bushy* Asta he unkemptB 2 took my time plu kin> stra##lin# #rays nestled in my beard. 8i#ured 2>d let myself #o for a while* natural as Gri00ly 'dams. The kit hen stunk fier e of rotten apples and mold1ridden oatmeal. The shower wasn>t mu h better. Just standin# under the steamin# water seemed like enou#h* but the sten h of my pla e lun# like a lee h. 2 li(ed in an abo(e #ara#e loft in a trailer park Eust outside of 4erney. 3y (iew was an abo(e #round septi tank and Ted>s dead )inneba#o. Swit hin# on the radio to drown out the banEo* 2 peeled a banana and peered out the window at Ted>s trailer. "reden e "learwater on(in ed the hell out of my ass to take a road trip to @odi. G7ou know 2>ll (isit*H 2 said aloud. GSoon as my "har#er>s a free #irl.H 3ade me some instant offee and sipped whilst peepin# Ted and his wife !eb* smoo hin# under their he kered )inneba#o shade. Between her oran#e s or hed* urly hair and his shiny baldness* they looked like two haloed an#els in the mornin# sunli#ht. "ute ouple thou#h* e(en for se(enty. 2 thou#ht* )ill that be meD 5a0elnut aroma filled my nose as 2 unlat hed the leather tube and snu k a peek at E(o>s treasure. 2nside* rolled up ti#ht and tied with yarn was this old* weird lookin> ow hide map. The illustrations were burned onto the hide in some pla esCin others bur#undy ink shone (i(idly and perfe t a#ainst the de#enerated leather par hment. GS oundrel.H Ted had !eb>s shirt half way o(er her head* stumblin# into the otta#e. GTed* you ras al. Se(enty fu kin> years on this earth and he>s still #ettin> fresh.H Returnin# to the map* the ontinents weren>t the ri#ht shape. They was mashed up. )here the map>s key should ha(e been was a letter sFuare* some kind of a stone a#e Sudoku. The lan#ua#e s ribbled alon# the orners ertainly weren>t En#lish. -ot 8ren h* neither. 't least* it didn>t remind me of the little 2>d pi ked up in 4ietnam. ' lot of the "on# spoke 8ren h* you knowD "ertainly not Spanish or German* maybe it was @atinD 5ell* 2 didn>t knowCbut the thin# appeared to be worth a pretty penny. 'nd if a dead man and his fellers didn>t want itD Shit* man. 2 needed the #reen.

Ted>s trailer ro ked like a shrimp boat in a sFuall as 2 rolled up the map and fi6ed to #et me some dou#h at E(erett>s Pawn. G7ou still wearin# rubbers* TedD Should be.H 2>ll admit* 2 en(ied the old timer when without warnin#* his )inneba#o e6ploded. 8ire blasted the sewa#e tank. 3y windows shook and my instant offee mu# shattered in my hands from the sho kwa(e. Sewa#e spewed onto my windowpane. 2 unra(eled his #arden hose franti ally and sprayed the flames* tryin# desperately to ontain Aem until the department s reamed in. 2 s reamed for Ted or !eb* but 2 knew from ba k in A-am Cthere weren>t no sur(i(ors. 3y ti#hty whities lun# to my ass ra k with wet ash. "inders swirled in the air like soot1washed moths. The rin# of fire roared and heat flooded the air in blurry wa(es. But from a short distan e* and only briefly* 2 spied a bla k fedora bobbin# lear of the billowin# smoke. O : 2>ll tell it strai#htCno bull pu kyCpeople had been tryin> to wa6 my u#ly ass for years. 'nd by wa6 2 mean kill* not a dainty tu# and spit polish from Bra0il. The life of Bu ky Solomon !ennis was trouble with a apital R. T plue Rubble* duder. 'nd when ya>ll #ot troublesD Pa k heat. That>s why 5arriet* my &S;S .;; aliber per ussion re(ol(er was lo ked* oiled* and on ealed dis retely within my three dollar fanny pa k. )a6 my ass* huhD 7>all #o ahead and try. 'in>t nobody #onna plu k the fluff of this yeti. E(erett>s Pawn had all sorts of treasures shel(ed on dusty hi kory. Twel(e #enerations of Bibles* muskets from pla es like 7orktown* sabers from Bull Run* and one sandy 3& from the bea hes of -ormandy. 8ifteen hundred Pe0 ma hines lined the top of a #lass ase filled with bundles of "onfederate ash* a Babe Ruth homer with missin# stit hes* and one of 8.!.R>s polio bra es. G)hen you #onna sell me that pistolDH E(erett wheeled himself from the ba k room with a nine1in h sto#y* smolderin# from his toothless mouth. GGet somethin# more modernD 't least #et a pie e that uses bullets* for "hrist sake.H G2 like astin# my own*H 2 said. GSuit yourself* Bu k. There>s somethin# an be said for a man that sharpens his own sword. -ow* what ha(e you #ot for meD 'nd don>t say a 3or#an sil(er dollar. 2>(e #ot more of those than a monkey>s #ot hair on his nuts.H E(erett hewed the i#ar and adEusted his white* otton

eye1pat h. 9lder An hell* E(erett was a (eteran of the Battle at Saint13ihel and one tou#h son of a bit h. G'ntiFue map. @ooks like 3i helan#elo inked it. 8i#ured 2>d see what 2 ould #et.H 2 popped open the ase and unrolled the map onto the ounter. E(erett>s smoke poured o(er the animal skin. G7ou still after that sweet* A<= "har#erDH GBet you>re ass* old timer.H 2 pointed to the word pu00le. GThat Portu#uese or somethin#DH G5rm. 2t>s not a map* really. )ell* not like you keep in the #lo(e bo6*H he said with a #runt and pro ured a ma#nifyin# #lass from the drawer beneath the re#ister. 5e sFuinted with one #ood eye and blinked. G2t>s alled a 3appa 3undi. Generally medie(al* reli#ious. The lan#ua#e here>s similar to @atin* but not Fuite.H G)hat about thatD @ike a riddle orDH GThat>s a word sFuare* from way ba k. Ised to keep se ret messa#es in Aem. 7eah* bit like a riddle. )ay ba k. Ba k in antiFuity.H 5e poked the burned letters. GBurned and inked. Inusual. )here>d you find itDH G8eller in the alley left it behind.H That>s all 2 was ready to tell. G7ou lookin# to pawn or sell itDH GSell it* bud.H 2 only had twel(e dollars in my po ket and 2 weren>t due another pay he k until Thursday of the ne6t week. G5ow>s the "row>s -est treatin> youDH 'h* Jesus. The "row>s -est. 2 worked shu kin> oysters o(er there for nearly a year. @i(in> off three fifty an hour and barely enou#h tips to o(er my Rainbow menthols. G8ine as wine. 7ou know what the map>s worth or whatDH GBu k* to be honest 2 don>t ri#htly know what the (alue may be. Gi(e me a day or so and 2>ll rin# my ollea#ue in "orinth. 7ou still at 5atter ParkDH G7eah. 7ou hear about Ted and !ebbieDH GShame* ain>t itD 8ire !epartment said #as leaked from the sto(e. 5ell of a shame.H E(erett it hed beneath his eye pat h and rolled the map ba k up. G)ell* they li(ed a full one* know what 2 meanD Suppose that>s Eust the way of thin#s.H 5e handed me the map and patted my rear. G7ou ome ba k tomorrow* Bu k.H The old timer smiled and his la k of teeth made his hin seem enormous. The bell Ein#led and 2 bumped a tall feller on the way out. The man sli ked and #reased his obsidian hair and

wore slender* rimless #lasses abo(e an ar hed nose. ' harsh s ar rea hed from his lower lip to the ed#e of his hin. Gi(in# me the stink eye* the man hoked up some words. GPardon me*H he said in hea(y* tinhorn German. 8irst thin# 2 thou#ht was* !amn* he looks meaner than me. 2 lit a i# outside and took a puff. 2 didn>t noti e it when we>d s run hed throu#h the doorway* but #lan in# ba k at the German* 2 witnessed him fid#et with a midni#ht1bla k fedora in his hands. GSon of a bit h.H 3y i#arette dan#led from my mouth and the German bolted. The bell din#ed as 2 busted throu#h* ra in# a ross the store towards the ba k room. G5ey* what in holy hellDH E(erett ried. Bookshel(es toppled and #lass ornaments shattered on the floor. The German made it to the s reen door* but it was lo ked. 5e pun hed throu#h the s reen and sFuirmed throu#h the mesh. In0ippin# my fanny pa k* 2 #ripped 5arriet and pulled ba k the hammer. G9ne step and you>re pi00a* hief.H 5e heard the li k and fro0e. G)e are but shadows* Bu ky !ennis. 'nd soon those shadows shall be illuminated and we shall ease to be.H G5ow in the hell do you know my nameDH 2 pressed my pistol into the meat of his spine. G7ou better flap them #ums* bud.H G8oolish 'meri an owboy* 2 ould ha(e stopped themLH The German turned and pointed to the map. G2 must destroy it while 2CLH E(erett shrieked as the #lass of the storefront shattered. Two pineapple #renades rolled onto the arpet and lanked to#ether. GE(erybody dowCLH The on ussion shook the shop. Glass and fire plumed like a pea o k>s tail* kno kin# us throu#h the drywall and into Shipley>s !onuts. !eputy Jonah sipped his offee with wide eyes. The !eputy rea hed for his side arm* but ma hine#un fire tore up Shipley>s* blastin# the ounter to splinters. The German pushed me lear of the first barra#e and du ked low beside me. Brass and lead rained like hellfire. Three whole lips from an 'J1;N was my #uess. 7ou don>t for#et that sound* not after 4ietnam. 'in>t another thin# like it. The firestorm Fuieted* a #hostly lull* when suddenly two blue steel* thunderbolts blasted

from a double1barreled Remin#ton. The shots ran# from E(erett>s Pawn as the bloodied* rot hety* hundred year old* hard ass wheeled into the street after the sound of sFuealin# tires. G5ooli#an o k1su kersLH Empty shell asin#s linked a#ainst on the on rete. GThink an old timer an>t rumbleDH Shoonk. Shoonk. BlastL The shot#un e hoed and blood splattered the passen#er side window. Rubber fumes louded the street. 2 ounted my nuts and peered o(er the table. !eputy Jonah Fui(ered like a fish on a line. GE(erettL 7ou alri#htDH 5e slumped in his roller hair. G-o*H 2 whispered. Three belly wounds soaked his shirt and stained the ratty blanket o(er his le#s. !eputy alled in an ambulan e* but we all knew the s ore. Gut shot and a ouple of red pints were already on the pa(ement. GE(erett* you>re #ood* bud*H 2 lied. G!on>t lie to me* boy. 2>m done. 2t>s fine thou#h. 2t>ll all be fine.H E(erett faded* eyes rolled ba k. )e all stood there* e(en the German. G!amnit* old man.H 2 held my breath. Poor bastard Eust ouldn>t stay lear of a fi#ht. 5ad too mu h hound in Aem. Too mu h #rit. The German lowered his head in respe t. 2t almost pissed me off. 5e broke the silen e by rumma#in# throu#h some loose rubble. 5e pro ured the map and ase from a disEointed* smolderin# timber. G3y name is Simon*H he said* blue eyes pier in# without emotion. G2 know you an>t understand. But* 2 need you to listen. 2>m sorry for your friend. But thisD This is the end.H O ; Pine trees outside the ity limits #rew snu# as i#ars in a bo6. So ti#ht in some spots it was hard to see into the wilderness. 3ississippi twili#ht peeked throu#h the bran hes* #litterin# on the sil(er rear(iew mirror of Simon>s ar. The German dro(e out of town alon# East "unnin#ham for nearly an hour* stoppin# at turnouts* lettin# ars pass when they sped behind too lose. -ow* 2>ll admitC2 didn>t trust the oil1sli k Jraut* but he sa(ed my s rotum. 'nd if a man sa(es your s rotumD 5e #ets his word in. Simon didn>t speak. -ot a peep until we pulled into a roadside bed and breakfast. "ute little

spot alled 3urph Z 3au(e>s. Simon went hea(y on the brakes and parked behind a tin shed. @eanin# o(er my lap* he Ei##led the #lo(e bo6 and rustled a rinkled manila en(elope. ' walnut handled )alther .:S was inside. 5e hambered a round. G!oes your antiFue e(en fireDH GShe>ll pun h a fist1si0ed hole throu#h a steer*H 2 said* un0ippin# my fanny pa k. G7es* but how do you reload a hundred fifty year old per ussion re(ol(erD They manufa ture no ammunition.H )e opened our ar doors simultaneously* eyein# ea h other like ea#er bo6ers shootin> for hamp. )indier than usual for that time of year* Simon>s heap* European aftersha(e wafted my way. G3ake Aem myself. "ustom.H 2 followed him to his room under the tri kle of hot* lammy rain. Jeys Ein#led in his hand and the lo k li ked. G)hy not use a modern weaponDH G"ome on* dude. @ike that -a0i pea shooter>s modern.H Bu ky you asshole* 2 thou#ht. Stinky eyes #lared from a olorless fa e as Simon opened the door. The G-H word set him off in that Fuiet* submissi(e wron#1side1of1the1iron1 urtain kind of way. Inderstandable. 2 don>t re kon too many Germans want to sli e into that blood1soaked ake. But he kept his ool. G)hy not modernD 7our .:QN 3a#numD 't least somethin# more effi ientDH 2 lit a Rainbow menthol. GBe ause it ain>t this one* ompadre.H Simon smiled and bummed a i#arette. The spark of the mat hbook illuminated the dark room. The Jraut #estured towards my pistol* wri##lin# his pointer fin#er. G7eah* sure*H 2 said* handin# him my .;;. There>s more than a #un>s aliber when you>re on 5ambur#er 5ill. There>s #ood medi ine* babe. 'nd what better medi ine than 5arriet Tubman>s re(ol(erD Good lady. Good #un. 7ou do the #eometry. 5ooah* 5arriet. 5oo1the fu k1ahL G'meri ans ha(e interestin# sentimentalities*H Simon said* returnin# the pistol. GProud to be* babe.H 3y boots sFuished so##y arpetin# in the dank* dimly lit room. Books lined ea h wall* sta ked neatly and ar hed a#ainst ea h other into shapes like horseshoes. G-o money for shel(es* 2 #uess.H GThey are si#ils of power.H Simon dra##ed on the i#arette and stamped it into a offee mu#. G!o you belie(e in #hosts* 3r. !ennisDH 3y silen e was answer enou#h. 7eah* 2 belie(ed. Shit* man* you wouldn>t belie(e what 2 belie(ed. They say truth is in the eye of the beholderD )ell* 2>(e sure as shit beheld some thin#s

that would turn a ma#pie milky. 's for truthD 2>m ertain 2 weren>t hi#h. Just bu00ed. GGood* then you won>t be so fri#htened of what 2 ha(e to tell you.H Simon asually pulled the leather map ase from me and laid it out o(er the bed. GThis is a #host* 3r. !ennis. This map and all its markin#s.H That was about the time thin#s #ot weird. But 2 didn>t ha(e time. 2 needed answers and ri#ht Fui k. G@ook* man. 2 don>t trust you as far as 2 an throw your mother. But* before you start rattlin# off a bun h of spooky ho us po usCyou tell me strai#htCyou tell me trueCwhy>d you sa(e my life ba k there at E(erett>sD 'nd why>d you stab that fellerDH G7our stoppin# me from killin# that hereti was unfortunateCperhaps 2 should ha(e killed you too.H Simon wasn>t kiddin#* didn>t e(en smirk. G2 appre iate the sentiment* !i kweed.H 2 sneered. G7ou>re ob(iously a damned fool. ' brute la kin# any understandin# of what is happenin# around you. The world is not as you per ei(e it.H 5e tra ed the dark burned markin#s on the mappa mundi* e6plorin# the oddly shaped ontinent and the stran#e* slim fi#ures that de orated the borderin#. GThe world is old* han#ed now. @ittle more than a olle tion of fra#ments stit hed to#ether to tell a (ery old story. This map is a hapter in that story. 5a(e you heard of Babylon* 3r. !ennisD The an ient ityDH GSure* they was like E#ypt but not. Pyramids and all that Ea00.H G7es* they were mi#hty. The Babylonians alled them 0i##urats. The Tower at Babel was #reatest of them. But there were others alsoClon# lost by the shiftin# of the world.H Simon tapped the letters of the word sFuare and ontinued. G'borek. 5a(e you heard that name beforeDH G-ope. Th> hell you mean by the shiftin# of the worldDH 2 saw Simon>s lips ti#hte like they>d physi ally stalled him from makin# words. 5e leared his throat and ontiued* GPan#aea. The #rand ontinent. @on# a#o* in the time of the be#innin#* the world>s land masses were as one. 9(er the ourse of aeons they ha(e split* shifted* han#edCthe #reatest han#e omin# in the time of -oah. 're you familiar with -oahDH G7eah* yeah. 8olks had themsel(es a wrath of God type flood. The bi# drink.H G7es* e6a tly. The flood to wash lean the un lean. The -ephilim.H Simon shuffled towards an ar h of books and lifted the top most (olume from the unstable sta k. 3arked by a faded* (iolet ribbon* he opened the leather te6t and showed me one of those olden wood utsCused to

dip Aem in ink like stamps. Before rubber* you knowD GBu ky* are you listenin#DH G7eah* bud. Go on.H GThe -ephilim were #iants* monstrous spawn of an#els fallen and mortal women. 7ahweh>s messen#ers fell from hi#h for a se ond time. 2n the a#e where a #reat and terrible kin# ruled Babylon in the "ity of Rebub. 'nd his name was alled: Jhulukane00er. 'nd the horrors of his unholy rei#n are lon# sin e for#otten.H The fi#ure in the pi ture #ripped a massi(e* flat1headed spear. Towerin#* he stood abo(e lesser men in the wood ut* rownin# the summit of a pyramid* pointin# into a ra k in the earth. @o usts spilled in su h multitudes they looked as (is ous as Te6as rude. Jhulukane00er>s #aunt (isa#e housed two unblinkin#* hollow eyes. 2nk on paper or not* his eyes looked strai#ht at me and 2 swear on my mama>s birthstone...the fu ker winked. GSo* a half1an#el lunati named Jhulu1kawhat0it #ot himself washed away by God. Inderstood. But what>s the deal with the mapDH G7ou>re lookin# at the Jin#dom of Rebub as it stood a#es a#o. )ashed away. @ost. 'nd as the world shifted o(er ountless millennia* Pan#aea was pulled apart by wren hin# Fuakes and (ol ani drifts. -o tra e remainsCno tra e but this map.H Simon slumped onto the bed and the rain pattered the tin awnin# stret hin# o(er the front door. !ishes rattled in a sink somewhere in the bed and breakfast and a toilet flushed. G!oesn>t e6plain why you stabbed somebody for it.H 2 losed the book. G3y 9rder sent me.H The German fin#ered a rin# on his ri#ht hand* tarnished sil(er with no Eewel or defined insi#nia. G)hat 9rderD 7ou mean like the Shriners or some su h bullshitDH GThe 9rdo Iriel. 9f whi h* 2 am a sworn kni#ht and prote tor.H Simon patted his )alther . :S in the shoulder holster beneath his bla k oat. GThe man you so lumsily sa(ed from my bladeB his name is E(okob Jeroba. ' fanati * de(il worshipin# a olyte of 'borekL The 'n ient Babylonian 9rder of the Eye of Jhulukane00erL Jeroba is mad* obsessed with the map and the myth that surrounds it.H G"hrist* Simon. E(okobD That 2talian orDH G2t is -ephili L @an#ua#e of the Giants.H Simon s offed and rubbed the ar h of his nose. G7ou spoiled e(erythin#. 7ears of huntin#* s ourin# the #lobeLH

GGiantsD "ome on* now. 2>m up to my ears in myths* le#ends and wha k1Eob* o ultish so ial lea#ues.H 'n old refri#erator bu00ed by the ni#htstand. 2 popped her open and snat hed a brew. 8orei#n la#er* but 2 weren>t omplainin#. The German si#hed and polished his spe ta les. G7ou know nothin# of what is at stakeLH 5e stood silently* wat hin#. 5e suddenly kno ked the beer from my hand and the sudsy an errupted onto the already damp arpet. G'borek wants this map to find Rebub for some purpose that 2 an only ima#ineC.H Simon stopped. GShhhLH he hushed. Broken plates e hoed from anther room. ' lady s reamed. The sink stopped runnin#. 2 drew 5arriet and rolled the hamber. Simon followed suit* adEustin# his #lasses and o kin# his peashooter. G3y God. They>(e found me.H O Q Rain ontinued to beat the tin awnin# like war drums. )arm water tri kled into a muddy pool outside. 2 o(ered the door and eyeed the shed as Simon rolled up the map. G"ar>s lear*H 2 said. The door reaked open. G9n e we>re in* start Fui k and pun h her up to ei#hty.H G)ait*H Simon whispered and pulled a lawnmower #asoline an from beneath the bed. GTake it for a moment.H 5e #a(e me the map and poured diesel o(er his books and belon#in#s. Stron# fumes. G'lri#ht* let>s #o.H ' shamefully muddy* bla k Rolls Roy e purred at the inn>s main entran e. ' man #ripped the wheel with alfskin #lo(es. E6haust plumed darkly* obs urin# two more men e6itin# the buildin#* driftin# throu#h the wall of fumes like #hosts. ' blood splatter marred the tall one>s shirt and tie. The other man had a soakin#* red burlap ba# in one hand. @ord 'lmi#hty knows what was in it. Pa e slow* #uns ready* in hin# our way to Simon>s wheels* another ar pulled up: the bla k addy from E(erett>s shootout. The door lo ks li ked. )e eased into our seats. G)e>(e #ot the Eump on them.H 2 pressed 5arriet>s barrel a#ainst the window. GBetween the two of us* we ould pop Aem old* bud.H G)e annot risk them #ettin# the map. 7our friend will be a(en#ed* we need onlyC.H 's Simon started the ar a man in a leather oat tapped the windshield asually with the mena in#

barrel of an 'J1;N. 5e was dark skinned* #ray hair bu00ed* with a #narly pink burn on his ne k and ollarbone. G5ey now*H 2 whimpered* pistol rollin# upside1down on my fin#er. G"ome on* now. )e>re #ood* hombre. !on>t sweat it.H GGet outLH The #unman barked* his (oi e muffled by the #lass. 5is words were wei#hted by a 3editerranean a ent. )e did what he said and two more eFually threatenin# fellers approa hed. They pa ked 'Js and a6es. Then 2 saw him. G2 know you* assholeLH The albino stood beside the Rolls* hands stuffed into the po kets of his thousand dollar oat. 3y hairy e##s Fui(ered from the bad (ibes. 2 half e6pe ted my balls>d shri(el to the si0e of Eellybeans and rawl up inside my stoma h. GThey will take their time killin# us*H Simon whispered. Starin# down the barrel of the So(iet stin#er* 2 motioned to Simon. GBud* y>all better hit the #as.H 2 wa(ed to the tall feller* real politely. G2 said pun h it* dude.H 'nd he did. The #unman>s skull popped as we sFuealed away. 'nd 3ississippi mud buried the #ory heap of knotted limbs. Rapid fire riddled the hrome bumper. Shattered #lass tore the seats. 9ne lu ky shot whisked throu#h my slee(e and rattled in the dash like a pinball ma hine. The Rolls and "addy s reamed up to ei#hty behind us* thunderin# down the slippery ba kwoods road. The new rain sli ked the tar and the wheels slid wildly. G8ast* man. 8u k the si#ns. 7ou>re on the 'utobahnLH 2 rolled the window down* unfastened the passen#er seatbelt and leaned into the rain. GThat>s enou#hLH 2 ried. The ra k of the .;; shook my arm* but landed sweetly into the #rill of the addy. Smoke spilled from the hood like a dra#on>s mouth and the "adilla swer(ed into the thi k of a two hundred year old tree* splittin# like a melon. 9ne bastard flew throu#h the windshield like a ra##edy paper doll* all ripped the hell. 2 winked to Simon. GThink he made itDH The ar blew* as adin# fiery debris into the wetlands. G)ooLH But the Rolls kept rollin#* dri(in# from the smoky (eil like a pissed off bull after a dumb ass matador. The albino emer#ed from the roof* railin# us with a double banana lip and radlin# a bulky* brutal So(iet GP1$Q #renade laun her. En ountered those sons of bit hes late in the war.

3ean* lean* and keen* babe. GSimon* bud. 7ou>(e #otta dri(e faster than you>re dri(in#.H 2 tried to fire a se ond shot* but )hitey had his rifle trained and tootin> dead on. Pinned. 2 peered o(er the seat like a mouse from a hole. G2n omin#LH Simon spun the wheel (iolently. 8oomL The #renade s reamed* impa tin# alon# the roadside* but the e6plosi(e on ussion shook us like a snow #lobe filled with #uts and #lass. 'utumn lea(es blew into the ar like someone hit the re(erse on a (a uum. GJesus 5oudiniLH The se ond blast ripped throu#h a pine tree and bran hes bit us like Geor#e )ashin#ton>s wooden teeth. The Jraut ould dri(e* but the wet road and e6plosions didn>t do mu h for impro(in# his handlin#. G)e ha(e to bail outLH he hollered. G7oLH Inbu kled and hi#h on adrenaline* both the lump in my throat and the one in my pants Eumped. G@ets doCLH 'nother #renade split the ar>s trunk in two and flipped us like a mattress. Sparks showered my fa e. Gra(el bit my heeks* ripped my shirt. The a6el snapped* a rubber tire sprun# in front of my eyes* and as the ar wrapped around the roots of a #randfather oak* a smoky urtain fell faster than 2 ould urse my lu k. O < 2 stirred in the #loom* fiery pain pumpin# from my fin#ertips like hot na ho heese from one of them hot na ho heese pump thin#s they #ot at the Get1n1Git. The fire burned hotter when 2 mo(ed my limp arm. !amn thin# broke in two pla es. 8ettered shards stru##led beneath my bruised flesh* #rindin# like halk. 3y whole body a hed like 2>d #otten a prostate e6am from an all too ea#er s rubber with his fin#er knu kle deep in my asshole. But hell* at least 2 sur(i(ed the rash. Slidin# up the wall* 2 rested a#ainst dank stone. GSimonDH 2 Fueried* fearful of breakin# that deafenin# silen e. G7ou still ki kin> or whatDH 2f he was there with me* he didn>t respondCor ouldn>t. The taste of hot* irony fluid mulled in my mouth and a flounderin# pie e of meat hun# loose in my heek. Rhythmi drips from a leaky eilin# e hoed in the bla kness. Pistol was #one of ourse*

fanny pa k too. 5ell* 2 didn>t e(en ha(e my do# ta#s on. 2 fumbled blindly throu#h my po kets* desperate for a i#. GPlease* baby. Papa needs a menthol*H 2 muttered* di##in# awkwardly with my one #ood arm. G'h* shitLH Bastards took my Rainbows* three Fuarters of a pa k too. But hey* they did me a solid by o(erlookin# the mat hbook. 2 stru k it* illuminatin# a laustrophobi 2 si#hed* snortin# blood. -o dis ernable marks alon# the walls* 2 tra ed my fin#er alon# the #roo(es that separated the stones* desperate for a weak spotB spot where they>d bri ked me up. G9wLH The flame fli kered out and blistered my thumb. G"hrist almi#hty.H ' red* lay bri k with no business linin# the wall stared out at me* marked by a familiar symbol: that 'borek word sFuare. 3aybe it was my an#le* all s run hed in the dark like a pret0el* but for whate(er reason* 2 saw somethin# in the sFuare 2 hadn>t before. 3r. E. Jeroba. Pri k* sure #ot his name around. 'nd E(okob was written twi e* JerobaCboth (erti al and hori0ontal. 'n ient Babylonian 9rder for sure. Those #iant1worshippin# ultists sure had a thin# for pu00les. GTh> hell you up to* E(oDH The thin# that really spooked me was that Jeroba spelled 'borek ba kwards. Shit* man* 2 should>(e been on Jeopardy. 2>d be su kin> ba k 3ar#aritas in "abo with my di k buried in a fine 3amasita. 2 fin#ered the orners of the 'borek bri k. )et on rete mi6 #obbed my rooked pointer* but 2 mana#ed to lean it out and slide the #rindin# stone from its pla e. 2 lit another mat h. GSimonD 7ou there* budDH ' blurry shape motioned in the shadows. 3y nose poked throu#h the wall like a hound do# sniffin# under a fen e. G2t>s me. Bu k. 7>all #ot a door on that sideDH ' blood dren hed hand rea hed from the shadows* palmin# at the wall. ' fa eless horror lur hed into the pale li#ht* #nashin# lipless teeth* starin# from empty eye so kets that sloshed with blood. 5is nose #nawed lean* hair in pat hesCThe Jraut>s #ooey skull said somethin# in German and slumped forwards. GSimonLH 2 ki ked in the wall* dislod#in# the loose stone. G5oly hell* buddy. )hat>d they doDH 2 radled the bastard in my arms. 5e was truly fa eless* skinned naked as #ummy red rabbit ready for a stew. 5e stared blindly in my dire tion* hokin# and #ur#lin#. G7ahweh willin#* 2 am soon dead.H 5e panted. hamber. -o door. -o #ate. Just bri k and moldy mortar sta ked from the floor to the four1foot eilin#. 'shes e(erywhere.

G@ordy* man.H G-o time. ?uiet. @isten.H Simon rea hed for my hand. GBore(e is the pla e where it ended and b1be#an.H 8luid ran between his Eaw and wri##lin# ton#ue. G9ra6or the speaker* they speak to#ether.H GSimon* 2 don>t understand.H 5is wet hand slipped from mine. GThe 9rder of the "ity speaks to re all him. They know where is Rebub.H ' bloody hand e6plored my musta he. GRe6oko is to re all him. E(okob is Jeroba. Jeroba is 'borek.H G7eah* it>s ba kwards. Palindromes or some shit. @ike ra e ar. But* re all whoD E(oD Re all himselfD @ike he>s #otta remember somethin#DH GRebub. Remember RebubLH The German>s breath be ame shallow* (oi e shrinkin#. GJhulukane00er.H )ithout so mu h as a shi(er* Simon stiffened and the mat h burned out. 3y mind in knots* 2 di#ested what 2 ould and belly rawled a ross Simon>s room towards the wall farthest from him. Rats skittered* a #ood si#n. The reek of wet ashes nearly o(erwhelmed me* but 2 found a narrow* offin1si0ed tunnel with rollers on it. They sFueaked as 2 brushed up a#ainst them. 2 was in a rematorium. ' ast1iron furna e door barred my easy e6it* but peerin# throu#h the bars 2 spied )hitey the albino down to his buster browns and easin# into a red* silken robe. )hitey had Simon>s )alther .:S tu ked in a white satin sash around his middle. The #renade1laun hin# 'J leaned a#ainst a metal foldin# hair. The albino sli ked his hair* #ummin# his hand with sali(a. 5e stepped towards the furna e and 2 heard a distin t li kCthen smelled a rush of propane and thou#ht* They tor h folks with propaneD G8u k*H 2 said aloud* #as poolin# around me so Fui k 2 felt faint in se onds. 2 mo(ed fastC with a swift push the iron #rate swun# open as )hitey strolled away. The lank e hoed in the stone room. The 'lbino #rabbed the pistol #rip Fui k* but 2 was Fui ker. 2 onne ted a blow to his Eaw and pin hed his wrist with my dan#lin# arm. GGot hya now* you stinkin>CLH )ith two #ood arms* )hitey tu##ed free* wren hin# my limp arm until 2 heard the tell tale ra k and pop. G8u kLH Pani ked* 2 twirled and fired a pun h to his solar ple6us. The blow onne ted with his #ut and he weren>t ready. 5e spit up lin#uini and ollapsed* kno kin# his head onto the hair.

The pistol spun. G-ot so tou#h without the ma hine #un are yaDH 2 winked #ro##ily as the propane flooded the tiny room* drippin# hot like demon spittle. !i(in# for the #un we bashed heads and the bastard beat me to it. Three shots 0ipped and rattled in the rematorium. GPitiful. 2s this the best Iriel ould musterDH )hitey hu kled* barin# stained teeth. G!ude* 2 don>t know what the hell you>re talkin> about.H 2 shook off the #as* but that tell tale sleepiness rept fero iously. GBut* 2>m #onna kno k you here to Sunday.H The albino paused and #i(e me a on e o(er. G7ou>re Eust some hi k lowlife aren>t youD 7ou>(e no idea what you>re into. Should 2 tell 2 wonderD )ould you e(en belie(e meDH "o kin# the pistol* )hitey smiled. The albino had too mu h rhythm on me. E(erythin# went in his fa(or. ' dumb lu k* butt1 fu k. G2 already don>t belie(e you*H 2 said with a smirk. GBut 2>ll tell you somethin# 2 do know.H G'nd what is thatD 7ou>ll swoop in and wrestle me to the #round with one armDH G7ou bein> a shootin> man should know. 2t>ll take more than a shot from Simon>s peashooter to slow me up. 'nd you must smell the propane.H )hitey stopped and sniffed the air autiously. G8ire that little beauty and we>ll both li#ht up like the 5indenbur#.H 5e smelled it all ri#htCthat deli mustard funk* boilin# abba#e (omitous fart that fuels new 'meri an barbeFue. The hi up 2 needed. Break in the rhythm. 'nd like a ballet dan er 2 dipped my body* foldin#* steppin#* until a fist full of albino nuts burst in my (i e #rip. The fu ker>s fa e looked like a blueberry. 8lailin# his #un hand* 2 laid into his wrist with lion>s teeth and sho(ed him headfirst into the furna e. The rollers did the work for me and )hitey #lided into the narrow darkness* wailin#. "link. "lank. 2 losed her off and hammered the starter. BoomL That bona fide* fu kwit* ult1lo(in> ommie fried like hi ken* e6tra rispy. O N The 'borek boys kept my thin#s stuffed in neon #reen tote ba#s up a lonely stair ase* the top of whi h was bri ked up like a #ra(eyard funhouse. 2 e6amined the dead end and found a dis#uised nook and passa#e where another set of stairs led into an e holess room. )alls were

pristine* freshly1dried* ity on rete. 2f it weren>t for the red* drippy andleli#ht 2>d ha(e thou#ht 2 were lookin# for my "har#er in a parkin# #ara#e and half e6pe ted the honk of a ar horn. 2 rifled throu#h the ba#s and tried my best to sober up and #et mean. )eak li#ht bent o(er the room. )a6 drooped from brass han#in#s* pointin# down a #loomy hall. 8rom what 2 ould tell* there weren>t any #uards. )hitey must>(e been the only one. -o worries there. 2 hu##ed the ool* flat wall and held fast the 'J1;N butt to my shoulder* eye on the steel rosshairs. 'fter all* 2 ain>t a fool. 2f totin# ma hine #uns and skinnin# folk was business as usual for those fu kosCthen hostile take o(er was s ribbled all o(er that lo ked* o ked* and ro ked So(iet banana lip. )ith e(ery step down the shadowy passa#e the andles dimmed and the hum of (oi es e hoed louder and learer. )hen 2 rea hed the end* a #rotesFue mouth shaped doorway barred my way with a bla k* (el(et urtain. 's 2 drew nearer* the urtain rippled unnaturally* like some twelfth entury de(il>s ton#ue. GThis is my life*H 2 mouthed to myself. GThis is my fu kin> life.H The portal weren>t made of no on rete. "hipped and hiseled from old #ranite* the #ar#oyle>s maw yawned rusty fan#s like s imitars. Teeth all bun hed up like rooked rebar. 2 swallowed harder. The de(il had two sau er1si0ed eyesClidless and unwinkin#Cthey followed me like tri k busts of 3ark Twain or So rates you>d see in haunted houses at the "ounty 8air. The din of #ibberish and ba kwards talk re(erberated a#ainst its ro ky esopha#us. The door moaned as 2 spread the urtain with the mu00le of the assault rifle. G'borek bore(e ora6or re6oko E(o ob JerobaLH The (oi es burbled. ' do0en loaked fi#ures stood o(er aluminum hairs* ro kin# and hantin#. The worshippers swayed in unison* red and bla k hoods whippin# like oked1up* Super @ube motori0ed* inflatable tube dudes. G'borek bore(e ora6or re6oko E(o ob JerobaLH they repeated. GThe 9rder of the "ity speaks to re all E(okob Jeroba.H Simon>s mappa mundi stret hed o(er the wall and was nailed to the stone with iron pins. )hat ould only be the 'borek head a olyte* stared up at the map and slou hed in his hair like a limp marionette. Two a olytes with finer raiments stit hed the slinkin# fi#ure furiously with shabby sewin# kits. -o one noti ed me reepin#. -o one noti ed my sFuinty eye tar#etin# throu#h the 'J>s iron si#htCthat is until 2 hambered a round.

Twel(e sets of sunken* pale eyes stared from the shade of their blood1 olored owls. Baffled at firstCthen ri#ht pissedCthe tallest of the ultists #nashed his teeth like a mad do#. -o one said nothin#. 2nstead* the leader>s aluminum hair s ree hed like nails on a 5emi and his #ra(ely* hollow (oi e strai#htened my short and urlies. G@ookin# to on(ert* son of 'brahamDH E(okob said* fa e sallow* bloodless* and bobbin# forwards. The two ultists ontinued to sew* stit hin# a festerin#* ma##ot1ridden wound on his belly. The liFuid #ore dabbled the stit hers> hands. Both of them #rinned as they li ked their master>s blood from their fin#ers tips* su kin# filthy Eui es from their thumbs. G2 remember you from before. 7ou>re the good man, are you notDH Jeroba lifted himself feebly from the hair* re(ealin# his nakedness and the horrible task to whi h his a olytes so dili#ently fo used. Simon>s se(ered fa e stared from Jeroba>s belly* but it wasn>t alone. 3y eyes de ei(ed me. 3y thou#hts unra(eled. 8a es stared from e(ery in h of the dema#o#ue>s body* o(erlappin# one another #rotesFuely* blinkin# and mouthin# silently* their lidless eyes dartin#* dire tionless. They were imprisoned souls* desperate to see the natural world* lon#in# for that whi h lay beyond their hellish prison. 3y hands trembled with the rifle. 3y mouth dried* throat sei0ed. G)on>t you Eoin usDH Jeroba be koned and the fa es yawned. G9ur time*H he said. G9ur time is almost upon us.H Ea h ' olyte returned their #a0e to the mappa mundi. G'oaooa br6 kboeoor (reekL 'oaooa br6 kboeoor (reekL 'oaooa br6 kboeoor (reekLH GShow us* @ordL 9* Jhulukane00er* Giant of BabylonL 2* your hi#hest priest* besee h thee. !eli(er unto us the wisdom of the tomb. The faithful return to RebubLH Jeroba ried out and the souls ried with him* spittin# (enomous* pink oo0e from their #apin# mouths and sheddin# tears of dead* bla k blood. G'oaooa br6 kboeoor (reekLH said the (oi es in his skin. GSimonKH )ords spilled from my mouth as my buddy>s lips* urled ba k. Behind him* the map>s an ient hide and ink rippled* shiftin# physi ally. 2nk be ame as blood* dark and murky as the abyss.

GSimonKH 5is fa e ontorted* a demoni tra#edy of mus le memory and pain. The map #rew* ontinents ollapsed unto themsel(es as ink slithered. 2 wat hed it redraw itself* s rappin# away old lines and pennin# new ones. The familiar shapes of ir les and sFuares haunted me. GJesus 5oudini "hrist*H 2 said. 2nk swirled and pooled* drawin# the #reat state of 3ississippi and her sweet ri(er rumblin#. @ouisiana followed* 'rkansas* 3issouri too. @i(in# ink s ribbled west towards Te6as and the Rio Grande. GE(oke not the @amb of -a0areth*H Jeroba said and shut his true eyes. GThe sa(ior is omin#.H Jeroba lifted his #an#ly arms. The other ultists did the same. GJhulukane00ar has returned unto usL ReEoi eL ReEoi eLH Jeroba>s head whipped. 2 heard his spine run h. The dema#o#ue>s flesh stret hed* pulled nearly apart* and the bones beneath sFuirmed like snakes. "ra kL 5is rib a#e busted* split into a sharpened a#e. 5is inside tied themsel(es in knots. SnapL 'rms floundered like tenta les* #rindin# bone on bone* ba kward and foldin# impossibly. Jeroba s reamed and his many #hastly fa es s reamed also. Spe kled eyelids blinked and like the sound of rippin# fabri * Jeroba>s throat tore and a bla kened* wet arm #rippin# an enormous eye e6pelled from the unsewn arpet of the dema#o#ue>s twisted mass. The "ult of 'borek prostrated themsel(es* di(in# to their bellies* pilin# onto one another like rats in a sewer. G5is Eidolon is omeLH The Eidolon>s wrist swi(eled my way and the eye stared ri#ht at me. 9r should 2 say* into me. 5ell* 2 felt its #a0e look deep. Real deep. !own into my darkest* for#otten memories* pi kin# at them like s abs. G5E hoose youDH ' thunderous (oi e rumbled* splittin# on rete and showerin# fle ks of debris from the eilin#. The eye tilted in onfusion. 2 didn>t answer. 2 ouldn>t answer. Shit* my mind wasn>t ri#ht. The eye knew me. Jnew thin#s 2>d for#otten. Giant fin#ernails s rat hed the inside of the skull* playin# at>s radle with my memories. Thou#hts fell throu#h the fin#ers like Babylonian sand. The eye saw all. 3y father. ' Prea her. 3an didn>t e(en say #oodbye... 2 shook my head. G)57 !2! 5E "599SE 79IDH The (oi eCthe eyeCJeroba but not Jeroba. The room Fuaked.

GPapaDH 2 said aloud. 5ead spinnin#* the on rete shrank around me. Red robes balled up to#ether and liFuefied* swirlin# into a sin#le amorphous form. G2 don>t know*H 2 stood on a flushin# drain. Blood and bone whirled into a siphonin# hasm beneath my shinin# 2talian boots. 3y father haunted the illuminated doorway* holdin# fast his alli#ator suit ase and Jin# James BibleCthe eye saw it* so did Jeroba and SimonCthe others. 3a ried into her polka dot slee(e in the kit hen. The o(en beeped. The toaster din#ed. ' kettle whistled. GTE@@ 3E )57DH The Eidolon boomed with desperation* but 2 ouldn>t hear his hereti ass o(er the freakin> whistlin# kettle. G2 @9-G T9 J-9) T52S. !2! 5E SPE'J T9 79IDH Steam whistles weren>t that loud. 3y eardrums near burst as it #rew louder and louder* until the blarin# wall of sound blasted like a thousand trumpets* shatterin# my unholy tran e* and se(erin# Jhulukane00er>s si#ht into my inner1most soul. 2 took two steps. The hideous mound of demoni eyes and teeth was de(ourin# ea h of the a olytes* rendin# mus le from bone as they hollered and prayed to him. The Eidolon i#nored me* its twisted attentions fi6ed upon a sin#le point in the li(in# map. ' town in -ew 3e6i oCsome pla e alled "himayo. Then* suddenly and uriouslyC2 smelled har oal and sweet* Tennessee pork. G2>m #onna su k out your fu kin# eyes* mother fu kerLH Smokin#* #ummy hands hooked my throat like a noose. The aroma of ooked meat rushed my nose and )hitey rea hed for the barrel of the 'J1;N with a harred hand. )ithout thinkin# 2 slun# the bastard o(er my shoulder and the skin on his arm peeled off like a #lo(e. 5e looked like a Baltimore pit roast and the poor bastard>s insides spilled onto my boots steamin#. 5e lawed my ankles* bitin# and thrashin#. So* 2 planted a mer y shot throu#h his dome* sprayin> the wall with barbeFued brains. The Eidolon>s shrill bellow thundered* G"523'79LH 8ast talkin> ain>t as useful as fast thinkin>. Talk>s a dra# anyway. So* 2 nutted up* kissed my rin# and he ked for one #renade in the hamber. 'imin# for the map* 2 held my breath. ThoonkL ' fireball onsumed the wall while the fleshy beast took the shrapnel. The on ussion ro ked me and tossed an aluminum hair into my thi#hCstun# like hell* but didn>t break my on entration. Shells linked onto the floor* rattlin# like de(il>s slei#h bells. @oad* lo k* o k. 2 fired off another #renadeCkno kin> myself onto my ass. 2 slid ba kwards* down the hall and

into a puddle of )hitey. ThoomL Smoke and ash spilled o(er me like #ray surf. 'nd the hamber was still. 2 ou#hed. GThat>s ri#ht* babe. 7>all an bit h and moan.H Brushin> lean* 2 slipped in red and pink #oop. G"an>t take the heatD Stay outta the kit hen* know what 2 meanDH The #rind of metal hairs a kled at me. 2t stirred beyond my si#ht* skulkin# within the smolderin# (eil. Then 2 saw itCthe lon#* bla k arm pullin# its own limp ar ass from the inders. Reminded me of 3ississippi tu#boat haulin> a supertanker. The Eaws and eyes #nashed and blinked* soaked with hellish* runny bile and bel hin# remnants of undi#ested body parts like a kind of annibalisti soup. Jostled by fear* 2 weren>t sure of what 2>d seen. "andles i#nited with white li#ht and pier in# beams illuminated the passa#e to the doorway* like refle tors on the hi#hway. 2 ran* areful and sure1footed. 'nd on e throu#h the threshold* 2 saw the lumberin# horror law nearly free of the de(il>s mouth. 5ot breath en(eloped me. 2 ki ked at the maw furiously* when abruptly the !e(il !oor woke. The shamblin# remains of Jhulukane00er shrieked as the de(il>s s imitar teeth fell mer ilessly upon the beast. The mouth #nawed and hewed* su kin# its demoni feast until the unholy portal lo ked shut into a prison of fan#s* unfor#ettably terrible and undeniably stoi . 2n the Fuiet* the faint words: G)hy youDH dripped from liFuid darkness. O S Ine(en stairs spit me out of a rusty mausoleum #ate. The smell of wet moss and fresh rain was wel ome. Sli(ers of twili#ht peaked from louds that broke apart* bleedin# blue. This ma#pie sFuawked at me* per hed way up on the swin#in# iron si#n. 2t rooked its ruffled head at me. SFuawked a#ain. G7ou and me both* hombre.H 2 fished for a Rainbow menthol. @it it with )hitey>s Rippo. 2 took a dra#* but it tasted like an armadillo>s #rundel. Two more ma#pies Eoined their rowin> omrade on the reakin# iron si#n. G5ell* 2>m in 5ayes "emetery.H 2>d leared weeds there for e6tra #reen* you know to #et the "har#er out of impound. 2 stamped out my i#arette in the ool mud and sFuished towards Jeroba>s slud#e1sparkly Rolls Roy e. 2t wasn>t my ><= !od#e "har#er* but sure as hell beat slo##in#.

Brit ars #ot the dri(er seats on the wron# side. !umb* 2 thou#ht. But Jeroba>s keys still #littered in the i#nition. 2 #a(e her a turn and she #rumbled like "hur hill. 2 adEusted the mirror* fi6ed my musta he and the radio dial spun between my fin#ers. 2 tuned in somethin# with swin#. !addy san# bass and 3ama tenor. 2 settled into the tremblin# midni#ht leather interior like a liFuored up prom Fueen. Two miles from 4erney* 2 pulled into 7es* 3a>am !ri(e Throu#h to #et a orn do# and slaw* but my wallet was bone dry and the only thin# Jeroba>s Rolls had #oin# for it was a bad ass air onditioner. That>s when 2 popped the #lo(e bo6. G5ot damn.H ' boatload of BenEamin 8ranklins tumbled into my hands. Twenty thousands bu ks wrapped in plasti * risp and lean as a re(erend>s sheets* and it weren>t two blinks before 2 dit hed that bu k1toothed roadster. 8i#ured it was hi#h time to buyba k 'meri an. *****

THE FIFTH T%U!PET OF B DDON

O & There>s more sand in 'meri a than people think. The lonesome west is blanketed by it. 5ot* dry* li(in# #rit. 'nd like a man#y oyote* the damn stuff turns up e(erywhi hwhere. @un#s* en#ine* ra k of my ass. 7ou hate it and lo(e it. @ike womenCor boo0in#. But when you find yourself driftin> alone* out on the road* whistlin# by sleepy* dusty towns like "uyamun#ue C sand>s the only ompany you #ot. 2 brushed the passen#er seat lean* kno kin# pamphlets onto my '1Team floor mat. 3ost of it was tourism lit 2 pi ked up in 'marillo* nothin> da00lin#: kayak the Rio Grande and some shit about personal enli#htenment from a to#a totin> Papa @ama. 2 tussled my hair free of a hitterin# ri ket and tasted desert #rit spill from my dishe(eled musta he. The #as pedal eased beneath my shiny* new 2talian boot. 2 thou#ht about her new paintEob* my "har#er>s that is. Bla k with andy apple stripes* draped o(er the hood like silk. )ondered how she>d hold up under the sun. See* 2 was from 3ississippi and used to all the so##y* sti ky heat. -ot the bone1dry desolation of a -ew 3e6i an afternoon.

2 slowed the ar to a rawl and lifted my a(iators for a better look at a wre k hauntin# a roadside dit h. The white hippy1dippy 4) stood out like a #host in the ni#ht. Bus weren>t any older than my !od#e* but sure looked it. Thin# was a metal skeleton* blea hed and beaten* worse off than the dereli t pueblos spe klin# the a tus1thi k ountryside. 5ollow as an empty #ra(e* missin# #lass* mirrors* doorsCthe messa#e spray1painted to the hull read: Santiago!s Bi"le B#s 4 5aith -l#" bubbled almost ille#ible by the sun. The body and #rill was busted up pretty fier e* like a hain #an#>d taken sled#e hammers to it. 7ou ould tell nobody sur(i(ed. 2 started li#htin# a i#arette* but one of my tears put out the fli ker from my aluminum li#hter with a hiss. 2 pulled behind the wre k* twisted and tu##ed the key from the i#nition. )e>re sorry* they told me. )e>re really sorry* 3r. !ennis. )hy so sorryD ' t of God* ri#htD The wind san# throu#h the rooked sheets of bu kled steel. 3y teeth be#an to #rind and my knu kles turned white* wren hin# the steerin# wheel. 5ad myself a hard ry into my fist. 2 hoked for almost a minute before talkin# to the sky. G7ou an kiss my ass.H The antiFue pistol in the #lo(e bo6 rea hed for my hand and a hundred and ele(en de#rees of -ew 3e6i an heat drummed me. But my "oltD She was ool as "ab "alloway. 2 didn>t hear him omin#* but the 3a Tru k thundered and laid down on his two1#allon air horn. Good thin#* 2 thou#ht and eyed the loudless sky. 2 was pissed. "ertain as hell 5is almi#hty ass didn>t want me rappin# on Saint Peter>s s reen door Eust yet. 2 ursed my keys as if the damn thin#s suddenly didn>t belon# to my ar. 2 re((ed her twi e* lit a menthol and peeled ba k onto IS1S; -orth. O $ The road to "himayo was a windswept wonder of for#otten towns and for#otten folks. Jind of pla e where all the Gno onesH and GnobodiesH of the 3id1west #o to #et themsel(es for#otten. But then a#ain* that>s easy for me to say* bein# that 2 was one of them. The hi#hway makes owards bra(e like that. 5ell* ba k home in 4erney* 3ississippi 2 was the nobody. Shit man* 2 was the kin#1fu k nobody>s nobody: a sla k1Eawed* redne k* (armint eatin>* #ood ol> boy with a sour Atude and a mean ass* trash talkin> pie hole. 2 was Bu ky !ennis* the lonely shmo you didn>t want to be. Sundown pulled a (iolet urtain o(er the hori0on as 2 pulled into a tru k stop in El 4alle !e

'rroyo Se o. This little diner by name of Roy 5obb>s stood off the road a ways. Some ross ountry ri#s and a fifties pi kup were parked under a fli kerin# neon si#n6 ,ome o) the Lightning B#rger$ 2 ki ked the dust from my feet and sat slumped at the bar* s opin# the re#ulars. 2t was a lean enou#h pla e with dirty lientele. That throwba k* fifties style with red* (inyl seats and he kered ounter tops sure rubbed me ri#ht thou#hCyou know* the way a diner sho#ld look. G"offeeDH ' petite* dirty1blonde poked her pretty head from the kit hen nook. She rested slender arms on the ounter and handed me a menu. 'bout my a#e* the #al had a way about her. Ised to all it #ra e before the ei#hties hit and turned all the Grefined ladiesH into Gprofessional women.H G3a>am.H 2 nodded and tilted my up her way. She drew ba k her hair with steady hands and tied off her ponytail. She winked* bri#ht1eyed with an honest smileCEust the way a woman should look. G3u h obli#ed.H 3y offee was fresh. )hat a pla e* 2 thou#ht. GGentleman huhDH She smiled. G'in>t no other way to be. -ow* what>s this @i#htnin# Bur#erDH She hopped up on the lifted step behind the ounter and dipped her lus ious bounty. She was buttoned up* all onser(ati(e and su h* but that sweet perfume and sli(er of lea(a#e pan#ed my belly like a so k to the #ut. GThat>s the spe ial* habanera pepper bur#er. Pro"a"ly not too spi y for a man like yourselfDH She rolled her eyes* real friendly like. G3ississippians an take the heat* ma>am.H 2 sipped pipin# offee* playin> it ool as an i eber#. G3ississippi huhD 'nd you>re tra(elin# for (a ationD BusinessDH she asked* either unaware or areless of my muddy1ass mood. 9ne of the bikers han#in# ba k by the Eukebo6 started pumpin# Fuarters. 5e #a(e me a little salute. G"ome on now* stran#er. )hat>s your name thenD 9r should 2 #uessDH 3y business was my own* 2 thou#ht. Pla es to be and people to see. !idn>t matter how pretty or how polite she was. G2>ll Eust take a @i#htnin# Bur#er and a if you>(e #ot a fruit salad* that>d be #ood.H So* 2 han#ed the subEe t. Rude* 2 knew. 5ell* 2 felt my mama>s phantom1hand sma k me up side the Eaw. G'lri#ht.H The waitress shru##ed.

2 si#hed and looked up from my a(iators. GBu ky. -ame>s Bu ky !.H 5er dimples perked into a smile. G)ell* Bu ky !KH ' lo k of her hair bobbed like #olden ribbon o(er her #reen eyes. G7our business is your own. 2 don>t mean to pry.H She paused* s ribblin# into the mar#ins of her little booklet. G2>m Trisha by the wayCif you need anythin# let me know* hun.H GSure thin#* Trish.H G2t>s Trisha.H The #al smirked and pointed to her nameta#. 2t boun ed her bosom. !amn* she was ute as button* but 2 weren>t in the mood. G)hate(er*H 2 #rumbled* a(ertin# my eyes like a true Southern #entleman. G7ou play it tou#h* don>t youD But 2 know you>re really a ni e #uy at heart.H G7eahDH 2 s offed. G)ell* 2 hear they finish last.H She winked at me. G3aybe. But they finish.H Trisha topped off my offee and twirled throu#h the swin#in# kit hen doors. G)aitLH She stopped* turnin# ba k* nibblin# on the ap of her pen. G@et me #uess your si#n.H G3y si#nDH G7ou know* you>re Rodia .H GShoot* Te6.H 2 si#hed* leanin# ba k with my fin#ers la ed. G7ou>re tou#h as nails* maybe e(en a little brash.H Trish took my hand and stroked my palm. G'in>t this somethin> elseDH 2 asked* thinkin# of rystal balls and #audy Eewelry. She lau#hed* G5elps me #et the ri#ht (ibe.H 2 ouldn>t hold ba k a hu kle. GShhhLH She #i##led. GGosh* 2 know what you are.H G'nd what>s thatDH G@eo.H Trish winked at me a#ain. She had a habit of winkin> 2 #uessed. G)ell* twist my whiskers. 7ou sure know your stuff* 3a>am.H G!on>t 2D 7ou know* the stars are more than pretty sparkles in the sky. @east 2 think so. They tell a story.H G)hat story>s thatDH 2 asked* #enuinely interested. G9ur story.H Trish looked out o(er my shoulder. G7ou know* all of us.H "lear bla k sky stret hed fore(er o(er the desert* a riddle of darkness and twinklin#

meanin#fulness* 2 Eust ouldn>t #rasp. 2>d been in 3ississippi my whole life and 2 ain>t ne(er seen a sky like that one. GSo* what si#n are youDH 2 wondered. G'ries*H she said. G)e>re a perfe t mat h. Get two fire si#ns to#ether and thin#s really heat up.H 2>d be lyin# if 2 told you 2 didn>t feel my pants lump up Eust a hair. GThat ri#htDH The kit hen din#er himed like a hur h bell announ in# the birth of my @i#htnin# Bur#er. GSay* uh. 3a>amDH !on>t know why 2 kept on* but she didn>t hear me. 'nd about that time the biker pun hed up his pi k on the Eukebo6 and it whirred to life with a Ea00y* -ew 9rleans funeral romp. Jind of tune 2 wanted to hear at my own farewell. 5ell* maybe if 2 were lu kier* a se ond weddin#. O : 2n 4ietnam 2 had a lot of bad wake ups. 'nd 2 ain>t #onna su#ar oat a God damned thin# for you. Tunnel rat Tuesdays* firefi#ht 8ridays* and hefty helpin# of napalm on Sunday. 3ornin# time in 4ietnam as like wakin> up in an asshole>s asshole. 3ornin# meant trouble* babe. But 2>ll tell you strai#ht* that Roy 5obbs fire1eatin> son of a bit h and his @i#htnin# Bur#erD That thin# tore me up worse than the Tet 9ffensi(e. 3y sweaty* swollen* ra ker ass was stuffed with an 3S% o(ered in 'meri an heese. Shit bud* the de(il must>(e #rilled that fu ker himself. 2 shuffled a ross the dirt lot and #ro##ily pitied myself o(er another sleepless ni#ht of rollin# onto my mornin# wood in a bu ket seat. 3y peepers played tri ks on me and folks pullin# into the parkin# lot looked like blurry* pit hfork toatin> imps. @ittle demons all line dan ed* elebratin# the finest* fire1spittin# #round1beef this side of the San 'ndreas. G5ot 3amasita*H 2 said with a i#arette dan#lin# like a limp worm from my bottom lip. G2>m older than hell.H 2 #lan ed Trisha smilin# from the diner. Girl must>(e woke before dawn. She fin#er1painted the spe ials onto the door with #obs of olor o(erin# her hands. 2 smiled ba k* su kin# in my olon and firin# up the "har#er. 3y ar rolled in the dust and near the blisterin# tar of the road. 5eat wa(es rippled. 2 si#hed. Pullin# out onto the hi#hway* 2 eyed her in my rear(iew mirror and wat hed her small hands #lide o(er the #lass* wet with blue* white* and #reen* she looked pretty in the mornin#. Bri#ht beams #littered* dapplin# her hair with soft* li(in# li#ht.

G-ot a shadow of a doubt*H 2 said to myself. -ot e(en a wed#e of shadeCTrisha was the sin#le most beautiful reature 2>d e(er seen. The kind of #al that sti ks with you and lea(es a bi# hole in your middle. Guilt pan#ed my #uts* A ause 2 knew 2 ne(er felt that way about my e61wife. 2 mean my dau#hters were my beauties. 2>d #o to hell and ba k for my 3innie and 3ay. But the e61wifeD 2t>d been years sin e we>d spoken. Sure a all here or there* mostly to talk to the #irls. But that ain>t s&eaking. 2t ain>t nothin# at all. 3y heart sinkin#* 2 sniffed and spied my mirror. Trisha wa(ed from the por h with that new* thumpin# e6 itement a person #ets when they feel that little somethin# stir. "all it a spark. 2 wonder what she thou#ht. 3aybe that feller ain>t so bad* 2 hoped. 3y en#ine hu##ed. So* like it weren>t nothin#* 2 offered up a phony salute and rolled out of her life fore(er. )hat ifD 2 thou#ht* )hat if 2 was worth somethin#* somewhereD Shit man* 2 was Bu ky !ennis. 2>d been throu#h ri(ers of shit and ame outCwell* not leanCbut #i(en some pomade and a stiff musta he wa6* ertainly de ent enou#h for a date. 2 shook off as mu h nonsense as 2 ould bear and thou#ht* 8or "hrist>s sake. 2 don>t e(en know the #irl. But then a#ain* maybe 2 did. Some people Eust feel like home. !espite e(erythin#* 2 bra ed up and took a lon#* hard dra# on my menthol. Smoke drifted. Some rows lamored o(er a wooden shed with rotten shin#les. G2 dare not dream it*H 2 ou#hed. But 2 knew deep* deep as hell>s bubblin#* molten oreC2 knew that 2>d lo(e that fine lady for the rest of my sorry days. 'nd that was that. 2 let it #o. 3y 4S hummed. Tires sFuealed. 'nd wa(es of heat ebbed o(er the blisterin# hi#hway as 2 rolled on out to nowhere. O ; @ow on #asoline* 2 sputtered to a stop under the rusty* tin awnin# of !ale>s Gas. Two ne#le ted pumps awaited my thirsty "har#er and ola ma hine #ur#led like a ir ular saw with emphysema. ' old anythin# sounded mi#hty fine* so 2 moseyed o(er to the ri kety sha k hostin# the ar hai road si#n. ' yellow su tion1 upped o&en si#n be koned from oily windows. The first pump li ked and a tattered* sti k of a man left the store holdin# a sa k and instrument ase. The drifter sported a ratty bomber>s Ea ket and #a(e me a on e o(er.

2 wa(ed politely. The #rubby feller #rinned with rooked teeth and nodded like he knew me. )ithout di(ertin# his eyes* he unlo ked the trunk of his smoky sedan and tossed in his lu##a#e. Si6* bony rows stared like silent sinners from a bu00in# tele#raph wire. Twel(e beady eyes tra ed my steps into the store. !ale>s pla e was trashed* torn up as if a drunken #iant shook it like a paint an full of liFuor dimes. Reeked too* foul and fetid. Rotten e##s* hot (ine#ar* and burnt paper permeated like a demon>s hookah. Empty ola bottles linked in a bed of ash beneath my boots. GIh* ten bu ks on number twoDH 2 Fueried* areful to keep my elbows off of the dirty ounter. G7>all #ot a mess out here* bud.H 3ounds of salt pa ked e(ery ra k and floorboard. 2 snooped o(er the ounter. The re#ister drawer slid half way open* pa ked with #reen and sil(er. 2 rea hed for the ash when 2 noti ed more rystalline piles of loose salt. ' trail of the stuff sifted from the supply loset. Grains plinked like sands in an hour#lass. 2 nud#ed the doorknob and it reaked open la0ily* re(ealin# a room filled flat to the door with a sheet of solid* bra kish ro k. The rows out front piped up* honkin# and sFuawkin# like an or#an. GPopsD 7ou in thereDH 3y uttered words dribbled from my mouth as 2 brushed my fin#ers o(er the man1shaped ontours of the salty pillar. The fa e was buried in the sea1salt* mouth and eyelids drawn ba k with terror by the in(isible wires of a ada(erous marionette. ' ri ket skittered from his nostril. GJesus 5oudini "hristKH The ola bottles linked behind me as a shadow loomed* bendin# the li#ht in the room and ast a billowin# shade o(er me. GSaid you>d ome*H The stran#er said. 3y blood hilled and my heart Fui(ered as 2 turned to see the sallow1fa ed drifter rowdin# the entry. 5e held a sawed1off* double shot Remy. GSaid you>d see.H G)ho said what nowDH 2 swallowed. The shutters kno ked the oily #lass of the windowpane lan#uidly* rainin# desert #rit from the pat hwork roof. G)e knew you>d sta##er in sooner or later* didn>t weDH The drifter raised his shot#un. Ruffled feathers e hoed o(er the #as station. GSure we did.H 'nother (oi e himed* but 2 didn>t see the other bastard. G@ook* fellas. 2 don>t want no trouble. 2 ain>t #ot no money. 5ell* 2 don>t e(en ha(e a Eob.

7ou want my wheelsD Take Aem. 2 did two years in "ountyC2 ain>t a snit h.H 3y blood bubbled up to my ne k* my (eins popped. The drifter turned and #lan ed at my sparklin# !od#e "har#er. G)ell* you #onna twit h or dit hDH 2 asked. The drifter>s fin#er ed#ed e(er so sli#htly towards the tri##er of his shot#un. 8u k* 2 thou#ht and rea hed for my "olt. GShitLH 2 ursed myself. G7ou left your weapon in the #lo(e bo6* Bu ky*H the drifter said* eyes on the ar. G5ow the hell do you know my name* assholeDH 8ury ta##ed out fear in the a#e1mat h is was my brain. G)e know.H 5e smiled* lips ti#ht and eyes hollow as a wishless well. The li k of the tri##er roared loader than the #un blast. Shards of white* stin#in# ro k bit my shoulder as the shot shattered the pillar of salt. 2 do(e throu#h the windowpane* rollin# o(er a bed of hi ken wire. The se ond barrel trumpeted* ri o hetin# off of a sil(er propane tank in the yard. 2 almost prayed for it to blow. GJill himLH the drifter ordered* stormin# from !ale>s. 2 ranked the i#nition and rifled for my pistol. Peelin# out* another #unshot pin#ed my passen#er door. G8ast* mother fu ker*H 2 said* eyein# his Ealopy. 2 sear hed my mirrors* but his was the only ar followin# and fast too. That pie e of Eunkyard s rap kept pa e with my "har#er like nothin# 2>d e(er seen. God only knows how many horses pun hed under that rusty hood. 2 #ripped my one1of1a1kind &S;S "olt 'rmy Re(ol(erB a lassi pie e of 'meri an ki k1ass by any standard. -amed her 5arriet after her ori#inal owner. She shined like a 3ississippi sunrise and sure knew how to ool me off when life #a(e me the sweats. Si6* ustom ast* per ussion1 apped .;; aliber beauties #a(e 5arriet the stoppin# power of a runaway Inion Pa ifi . SFuealin#* the drifter>s ride ollided with mine. Tan#led metal sparked as both ars slid wildly from the road and disappeared into a whirlin# der(ish of smoky sand and a tus orpses. Tires burst* shreddin# into wri##lin# bla k* rubber strips. 3y head thumped the steerin# wheel* din#in# like a maul on a railroad spike. Throu#h a loud of swirlin# debris* 2 spied the drifter aimin# his shot#un with re kless abandon* i#norant of our steely knot of ei#hty1mile1per1our* automoti(e death. G)hat are you possessedLDH 2 du ked between my knees* tastin# the hot blast of #unpowder

o(er my ba k. ' (iolent Eolt Eostled me upri#ht to see the rapidly approa hin# ho# fen e. 2 bra ed myself a#ainst the wheel* at hin# a #limpse of the drifter>s sho k. 9ur snarlin# wre k demolished a rotten* timber fen e and our rippled hoods dunked into a muddy waterin# hole. 2 heard a wet run h and wat hed the drifter>s limbs disappear into a plume of splintered two1by1ei#hts. Rank* shit water and sti ky pellet feed splashed into my mouth. GSon of a bit h.H 3y tremblin# hands wouldn>t let #o of the wheel. Shallow oinks e hoed throu#h the twisted hassis. 2 peeled myself from the leather seat and onfronted the bulbous* snortin# snout of an inFuisiti(e sow. G"hrist.H 3y poor ><= "har#er weren>t e(er #onna see another sunrise that was for darn tootin>. GTh> hell you lookin> at* )ilburDH 2 pulled myself from the wre ka#e and slipped a ross the hood. 3y knu kles throbbed* white with the (i e1#rip 2 had on my re(ol(er. Pi# sFuallier marred my boots as 2 sloshed free. GSmokeDH 2 asked* passin# my menthol to Porky as 2 slumped forward* lu ky to be li(in#. )ater stirred* ebbin# red a#ainst my feet. The pi# oinked a#ain. G7ou said it. 5e>s lasa#na.H 2 spit out a molar. Bubbles hurned from the filth and two* rooked hands lawed up the muddy bank. The drifter>s Eaw li ked like a bad arburetor. -othin# but blood and spit drooled from his broken fa e. 5arriet>s iron si#ht marked his brow rid#e. G)ho are youDH 2 asked* ho kin# a red loo#ie. G2 amKH he #ur#led. 5is (oi e was stereophoni . The drifter had someone else in there with him* maybe two* maybe three more. G)e are*H he ontinued* (o al hords knotted and hummin# like a drunken barbershop Fuartet. G3ine is @e#ion.H GTh> hell kind of name is thatDH Ineasiness pin hed my sphin ter* Fuakin# my bowels. G3ine is @e#ion* for we are many.H ' slew of hokin# (oi es burbled from the drifter>s mouth. G)e are one that is si6 and si6 that are one.H G7eahDH 2 pulled my thumb ba k on 5arriet>s ni kel hammer. G)here>s your #an# atD 2 heard y>all s hemin#.H 2n my soul 2 knew we were alone* lost* and out of si#ht from any #ood1 willed God. )ho does that almi#hty son of a bit h think 5e is anywayD Rested on the se(enth

day my ass. 8u ker>s been out on disability for a hundred million years. GPleaseKH the demonia pleaded* writhin# in foulness. GSend us not into the 'byssLH G7ou killed a man. Turned him into so mu h #arnish. 8or whatDH !espite the desert* hilly wind rustled my hair and my insides urdled* sFuirmin# like worms doin> the 8ru#. The possessed didn>t respond immediately. 5is tone han#ed and only one (oi e spoke* deli ately and fri#htened. G3er yLH it said* G3er y of the @amb* ye Bu ky who was sent byCLH )ith unholy speed* the !rifter snat hed the pi#. 2t sFuealed. GPlease*H it ontinued* radlin# the pi# in its arms. G)hat lo(e ha(e you for 5imD 5e #i(eth nothin# but sorrow* bestow nothin# but demC.H GJesus*H 2 mouthed. The drifter frowned. The pi# s rambled* snortin#* but unable to break free. GC7et what reward do you re ei(eD )hat was your pri0e for embra in# the darknessDH 3y #un was hea(y* my heart a bri k of lead. GShut up*H 2 protested. G)e know* Bu ky !ennis.H The demonia smiled* strokin# the suffo ated pi#. G5e who #rants you nothin#* taketh all thin#s dearest. 9h yes. )e know. )e know.H The drifter>s many (oi es ra kled in unison. They were horrible and inharmonious. G7our dau#hters and lo(eless wife* e(en the man that took are of them when you ould notC.H GShut your mouth*H 2 whimpered. !ry heat rose up from the in(isible desert urrents. 2t flo##ed me like a hot iron* harrin# my flesh and searin# my mind> eye blind. GTheir bodies man#led* Bu ky. Inidentifiable in the warped sla#.H @e#ion re alled the ima#ery and made it real in my mind. G3ay was sli ed in two by the passen#er side door. 7our wife was rushed under the wei#ht of the en#ine. But 3innieD 3innie li(ed for si6 hours before they found her. "ompounded bones kept her body stit hed to#ether a lone time. 2ma#ine it. 2ma#ine hard.H 5is ruel smile s ored like a hot brand. G3er y* Bu ky.H 5e frowned. G3er y of the @amb.H 3y world shrank to the si0e of a sin#le pistol hamber. 5arriet>s burnt perfume ti kled my nose. 2 tasted it* bitter as an unfinished life. 2 saw my dau#hters lau#h in July of AS;* runnin# alon# the ri(erbed in polka dot sundresses* pink and yellow. Starli#ht twinkled and li#htnin# bu#s wisped throu#h the woods. Their olorful ribbons dan ed from their heads as they au#ht the flutterin# li#hts in marmalade Ears. She Ears shattered and 2 was in the anyon floor. Silent and stunnin#* the anyon walls were tra ed with

the deadly trails of s ored ro k and destroyed automobile parts. 't the bottom* down in the dark* belly of the liffs* the )inneba#o hissed with burnin# rubber* wi ked steel* and the silent stillness of death and star(ed fires. Tears fell* but 2 didn>t weep. G)e know* Bu ky. )e know.H The 8iend>s sympatheti frown was false. G3er y. 3er y of the @amb.H 2 eyed him with a stone1 old* i eber# of a stare. 'nd he knew what was omin#. G)aitCLH GTou#h ro ks.H 2 sFuee0ed the tri##er* unleashin# a thunderin# .;; aliber ra k and sendt the drifter>s unholy ass to hell with a rispy splatter. G2 ain>t no @amb.H 3y har#er sundered behind me* poppin# and #roanin# as steel folded in on itself. ' ool sheen blinded me* an obEe t. 2t sparkled in the sand not ten yards off. The drifter>s instrument ase was unlat hed with a shabby* brass trumpet inside. ' weathered look of a#e and ne#le t marked it like a tattoo. 2 pi ked it up* fin#ered the (al(es. They eased beneath my fin#ertips. ' ni e trophy* but 2 didn>t know how to play. O Q Takes three days to die without a drip of water. Two if you>re in the desert. 9ne if you>re a boo0in#* pretty boy from 3ississippi and spoiled by all that sweet* Southern humidity. 3y nomadi wanderin#s alon# the road to "himayo left me dry as a nun>s unt. )ithout so mu h as a passin# tru k or fleaba# pit stop* a swill of that shit1 urdled* bloodied1up* pi# water sounded mi#hty fine. "rows ir led o(erhead sin#in> that unner(in# hymn they do so well. @andin# in pat hes of dried orn husks* the bastards skittered behind my heels* bobbin# alon# the ornrows* waitin# real patient1like for me to perish. GGitLH 2 hollered* firin# a blind shot at the sky. They s attered* but not for lon#. G!amn youLH 2 fired until my hambers rolled empty and then some. GGit on nowL GitLH But it weren>t no use. 8eathery* doll1eyed shadows haunted my desolate footprints. 2 forwent thirst and sobbed without tears. 3y lips ra ked like ri e paper* #ums raw. 'round noon on the third day* my fa e bled. The skin on my heeks split and peeled* weltin# raterous sores. 3y eyes stun#* sealed nearly shut by the arid wind. 2 fi#ured 2 should walk at ni#ht* but 2

ould no lon#er dis ern the differen e. )ander as you will* 2 thou#ht* Either by the li#ht of the moon or the dark of a blindin# sun. 5arriet>s steel seared my #rip with e(ery a#oni0in# step. 2 barely held on with my noodley fin#ers. 'nd when my body #a(e* 2 fell at the base of a yellow all bo6. 2 dialed the fu ker* but like my whole damn life* nobody was on the other end. ' weak man would>(e #i(en up. 5e>d ha(e lasped his knobby hands and prayed like sinner. -ot me. -o prayers. -one. 2f that was to be my final momentD 3y meanin#less endD @et it be so. @et my pi kled li(er and bla ked lun#s return to 5is earth. @et 5im hoke on my bitter asshole. God* 2 #ot all riled up and readyCbut thenD Then the #odforsaken phone ran#. G7eahDH 2 rasped. G!id y>all Eust rin# from bo6 J1&1=D 7ou>re aware this is an emer#en y line* sirDH )oman on the other end was mi#hty perky and testy as a water mo asin. GThat>s ri#ht. 2 needC.H G"an you state the issue* sirDH G7eah* well 2>mC.H G"an we #et this resol(edD @ines are bu00in> off the hook* sir.H G9ff the hookD Th> hell you talkin> about ladyD 2 need somebody to #et on out here and pi k meC.H GPlease holdLH She swit hed me off. 2 tilted my a(iator sun#lasses and sFuinted o(er the hori0on. 3iles of ra ked tar slept soundly under blankets of ripplin# heat and desolation. G"all bo6 J1&1=. Please* des ribe the nature of the problemDH G2 need a ride. 2>(e beenC2>(e been on the road two days now.H GSir* we>re not a towin# ser(i e.H G8or fu k>s sake ladyLH G7ou need to mind your tone* sir.H 2 #roaned and wobbled to my feet. G7ou #ot a ar or somethin> an swin# byD There ain>t nobody out here.H 3y tearful* hokin# lau#hter made it diffi ult to speak. G7>all an either pi k me up or lean me up. 2>m fryin> like an e##.H O <

)ay ba k* when 2 was a snot1nosed hoodwink* my father played this #ame on the road. ' memory #ame. See* whene(er we>d sail down the hi#hway and spot a rest stop* 2>d ha(e to spell the name out loud* fast as 2 ould. 5e told me it stoked the oals under my brainpan* kept me sharp. GThere>s one*H he>d say. G@a BaEada Rest Stop.H 'nd 2>d s ramble. G@1'1B1'1J1'1!1'LH 2f 2 #ot it ri#ht he>d toss me a JuEube* #reen one. 2f 2 #ot it wron#D 5e>d put out his i#arette on my ne k and tell me to try a#ainCto think ba k hard Cto remember with perfe t larity what 2>d seen. @ookin> ba k 2 an>t re all the names of any of the rest stops* but 2>ll ne(er for#et how to play the #ame. G@a BaEada*H 2 said. G@1'1B1'1J1'1!1'.H 2 spelled. The tru k dri(er looked me o(er. GThat>s the pla e. Bus rolls in about e(ery three hours.H 5e was a bi# feller* said his name was John Tu keredClike the sleepyCbut e(eryone alled him Johnny the 'pa he. Johnny>s hard* leathery fa e was red as 3e6i an law and he wore bla k* horn1rimmed #lasses o(er a wanderin# fisheye. 8unky hulk or not* it sure was thou#htful of him to pi k me up with a seat full of burritos and bottled water. GSay* you wouldn>t happen to ha(e a smoke would you* JohnDH )eak and si kly* water was wel ome* but ni otineCdamn* 2 needed a dra#. GInfilteredDH 5e tapped the soft1pa k and shook out a stubby* bla k straw1lookin# smoke. G9r you on the Fuittin# side of the buttDH G2 ha(en>t Fuit nineteen times. Infiltered are fine by me* bud. )hat are these* i#arillosDH 2 pursed my lips* wa(in# the tip o(er Johnny>s 3ets li#hter. GJretek from Gudan# Garam. That>s 2ndonesia.H Johnny the 'pa he lit his own and slowed the tru k to a stop in the parkin# lot at @a BaEada. )e o(erlooked the hi#hway* how it steadily limbed into the hills* windin# and walled on either side by Ea ##ed ro ks and dead trees. G2>(e #ot asthma see*H Johnny said. G!on>t know a lot of smokers with asthma.H 2 tasted the smolderin# tar. G' tually* 2>ll take that ba k. 2 know more than 2 should.H Johnny lau#hed. G-o kiddin#. That>s why 2 puff kreteks. 8olks in the orient make #ood medi ine*H he said. G7ou mindDH Johnny unwrapped burrito foil and du# in. GThat>s a ni e trumpet.H

G)hatDH 2 weren>t listenin#. G7our trumpet. 7ou play #oodDH Johnny had ri e stu k to the orners of his mouth. G2 used to play when 2 was a kid.H 5e tuned the radio to a bo6y Ea00 station. G-ah*H 2 said. G'in>t mu h for musi makin#.H Johnny burped and took another bite. G'in>t e(erybody>s thin#. )ant another smokeDH G7ou really smoke those for medi ineD 2>d ha(e fi#ured a feller like you>d ha(e #ood medi ine too.H 3outh full* Johnny stopped. G)hy>s thatD Be ause 2>m 'pa heDH 5is eyes widened. G2 #et it* ri#htD 5i15ow1're17aL )e>re ti#ht with the Great SpiritD That itD 3e hewum a tus root and B'3L Gonorrhea>s #one.H 2* Bu ky Solomon !ennis* fu kwit and ass1hat* rin#ed Fuietly with a old burrito and 2ndonesian i#arette in my hand. Sat hel 3outh 'rmstron#>s trumpet hummed o(er the radio wa(es. 5ell* 2 didn>t mean nothin# by it* but then a#ain* maybe that>s the refle6 e6 use for a Jlansman. G7ou here for 2ndian wisdom* little white manD That what you>re doin# in the desertD -ibblin# peyote on your spirit FuestDH Johnny hu kled* snidely. G'h* fu k it. 2>m Eoshin#* brother.H 3y shoulders rolled down from my ears. GGot no insuran e. 2 smoke Aem for asthma. But really* 2 Eust di# Eastern ulture* you knowD "hina* Japan. 2 lo(e ninEas and shit.H 2 noti ed the wi##lin#* hula1Buddha on the dash. GThey>(e #ot swa##er for sure.H 2 sipped my water. G!id a ouple tours in A-am* myself. Pretty ountry. )ould>(e been prettier if 2 weren>t bein# shot at. But heyC5ooahLH G'men* brother. 8irebase Rip ord.H Johnny the 'pa he #a(e me a hi#h1fi(er* brandishin# his I.S. 'irmobile tattoo. G"urrahee*H he said* GStand to#ether alone.H G9n that*H 2 paused* Gthe por elain throne awaits.H 2 hurried to the toilet* searin# my soles on the ement. The restroom was trashed* as one ould ima#ine. 3atted* so##y paper with brown stains lumped into orners* leakin# pipes o(erflowin# sinks. 3y stream was weak and yellow as a wasp. The flores ent li#hts fli kered. The flush ran a lon# time as 2 stared blankly into the mirror and rinsed my fa e. Stains of blood dotted my ollarCfunny that Johnny didn>t noti e. 2 dried my hands with a Eunky air blower* notin# the fli kerin# li#hts dimmin# out. !idn>t

make no bones about it* but then the li#ht outside dimmed. "louds o(er ame the sun and dayli#ht sank into the ni#ht. The air blower whirred Fuiet and the toilet bowls flowed o(er with hunky* oa#ulated blood. GJohnnyDH ' bu00 swelled and shrank like a symphoni mo(ement outside. Sloshin# throu#h a rimson wake* 2 went on the lookout for Johnny>s tru k. 2t was still parked in the same spot* but the dri(er>s seat was empty. The radio droned and a few ri kets boun ed alon# the ement* lat hin# to my boots* some au#ht in the sti ky red syrup rushin# from the restroom door. G'h hell*H 2 said* sFuintin# to make out a dan#lin# fi#ure beneath a tree* thirty yards off. GJohnnyKH Poor bastard>s twisted orpse swun# like a pendulum. ' ri ket hopped to my shoulder. G!o you not seeDH the ri ket said to me. G!o you not see the an#elsDH The noon sky be ame as midni#ht* maskin# e(ery (esti#e of illumination sa(e for twinklin# stars whi h #lowed far lar#er and loser than what is natural to the world. Pale li#ht loaked me in shimmerin# robes. 3y 4erney 5i#h 8ootball Rin# #limmered. G5e fell and told us their names. 5e told us their storiesLH the ri ket said. G)ho>s thatDH 2 asked* eyes on Johnny>s dan#lin# feet. @o usts pri kled o(er his body like #oose pimples. 2 shooed Aem off instin ti(ely. GThe -inth )at her* Gri#ori and 8ather to -ephilimLH G7eahDH 2 wasn>t yet stron# enou#h to undo the knots in the rope. 3y si kly fin#ers fumbled* drained by dehydration and fati#ue. G5e who se ond fell and foretold the wisdom of the stars. BaraFielLH The ri ket fluttered* fiddlin# in the air. GBaraFielL BaraFielLH G)hy>d you kill* JohnnyDH 3y thumb fli ked the ri ket onto the #round. 2 raised my foot. GGet talkin> bu#.H G-ot 2L -ot 2LH it ried. G2>ll ask a#ain.H 3y boot ame down. Before the run h* another (oi e* distant and old* e hoed in answer. GTo be my (essel*H Johnny whispered* still han#in# from the tree. G7our friend eases but fore(er after 2 ontinue.H 2 stepped ba k and he ked 5arriet>s hamber. G7ou anythin# like that other #uyDH

GThe @e#ion is but the hand. Just as 2 am but the mouth*H BaraFiel said. 5is (oi e was #ra(ely as a spade s oopin# mud. Johnny>s eyes batted open* pupils like mirrors refle tin# the sky. G7ou>re sayin# you killed a de ent man to #i(e me a messa#eD 7ou ain>t makin> a (ery #ood ase. See* if 2 were youD 2>d beC2 don>t knowCphilosophi0in> pretty darn hard on ways to keep me from eradi atin# your unholy ass.H GBold. But* brash also. 5eed my wisdom. Go not to "himayo.H GTou#h ro ks*H 2 said. 3y palms lammed up. BaraFiel smiled* stret hin# Johnny>s fa e like a heap rubber mask. G7ou were born in the arms of Re#ulus* swaddled in the warmth of !enebola* rowned by 'l#iebaL Re(el in your #iftLH The words dribbled like (is ous #rease and lo usts fed upon that #rease* skitterin# throu#h his lothin# and loose skin. G-one of that amounts to a hill of beans to me.H 2 shaded my eyes from the blindin# li#hts beatin# down on me like a stiff 3ississippi rain. Stars drooped* meltin# like wa6. G!o it for Trisha the Ram*H the demon hissed and Johnny>s fin#ers Eerked stiffly. G)hat was thatDH 2 #ripped the pistol ti#hter. G7ou threatenin# her* budDH G7our twin fire burns not in "himayoLH BaraFiel motioned to the north. "ri kets swarmed into the tree>s anopy. -i#ht faded and the sun peeked throu#h the (anishin# loud of inse ts* lea(in# Johnny>s limp body swin#in# lifelessly from a reakin# limb. 2 said no prayers for Johnny. 5ell* 2 hardly knew the man. But* 2 found a sho(el in his tru and used it to di# a shallow hole. -o more than three feet* but 2 beat down the dirt ti#ht and flat when 2 filled him in. !idn>t take enou#h time for a #ra(estone* so 2 left my do# ta#s on a loose* lay bri k and stuffed his pa k of kretek>s in my shirt po ket. -ot mu h of a send out* but most satisfa tory for a burnt out fi#htin> man. G"urrahee*H 2 said. 8rail wind ki ked up a der(ish of powder and sand. 2 hardly heard the en#ine whir* hardly felt the Eolt of the #as under my foot. 2 dro(e north* absent of thou#ht and Fuiet but for the soundin# of @ouisiana trumpets on a dead man>s radio. O N There>s an old story my father told about an 'fri an prin e by name of 'madi in the time of

Sheba. 2t>s the only thin# aside from s ar tissue he left me after he died. Pop spun tall tales. )ild* outra#eous yarns and that filled my head with ad(entureCboth real and ima#inary. Slow* bitter ni#hts dri(in# the road* low on #as and hun#ry* we slept nu00led under heaps of Grandma>s Fuilts. 2 remember the embers of his i#arettes #lowin# in the bla kness of 'thens* "orinth* and )i hita. 2 woke e(ery day to a runnin# en#ine and dry wind. See* Pops was a prea her and he tra(eled all o(er reation. 9dd Eobs at hur hes kept him fed and any e6tra #reen nursed his sinful appetites. 3ean* dirtyCa heat* liar* and womani0in# thiefCthe bastard weren>t worth a name. But he did #i(e me one thin#. 3an #a(e me stories. 'nd the Tale o) Prince 1madi was my fa(orite. Story told of the dyin# Jin#dom of 9run1'iye* its dyin# ?ueen* and her son 'madi* whose name meant: Gdestined to die.H Bum rap for a know1nothin# newborn if you asked me. 5ell* e(en the Elders wrote him off as a weaklin#. Si kly* slow* too small for huntin>C'madi #rew up as pitiful as toothless ro odile. ' rube* So one ni#ht* the Elders #athered in se ret and planned a way to take 'madi>s i(ory rown for their own. 'nd like a star(in# murder of rows* the Elders s hemed that on 'madi>s ele(enth birthday he>d be sent on a hunt. The lion hunt. The hunt to pro(e his royal mettle. GThe Elders meant for 'madi to die* seeD Plottin> like "assius* those ornery bastards wanted him out of the way* son.H 3y father told as he swept the hur h with a wooden broom. GBut there was this one Elder* some an ient ha# with tits that kno ked to#ether like wre kin> ballsC she protested* re allin# a pro(erb so old* few folks e(en way ba k then re alled. GTwi e a man is born*H she said* GSo twi e a man shall die.H The Elders s offed and pi ked boar meat from their yellow teeth. G)e>ll see what the lions think.H The lau#hed like hyenas and slapped their boney thi#hs. 'lone in the wild* surrounded by thunderin# beast and beaten by an unfor#i(in# sun* 'madi held his prin ely spear. 8olk told of the spear. So sharp in fa t* the wind bled as he ran a ross the sa(annah. ?uiet and patiently* he rept amon# tall #rass where the water buffalo lapped thirsty ton#ues into pools of pre ious rainwater. 'madi drank beside them. 5e poised his shinin# point and walked autiously* hidden beneath the drummin# feet of lumberin# elephants. They sounded their trunks as he passed. 3any suns rose and fell and the moon1sli(er drank of the ni#ht sky until it was fat and round* #leamin# like a God>s eye. 9nly by

the li#ht of the moon did 'madi see the pride and their Jin#* baskin# beneath the starlit sky in a bed of whisperin# #rass. @ion saw 'madi and approa hed with barred fan#s. G2 am Jin#*H @ion said* G7et so are you.H G2 am*H 'madi said* markin# the lion with his spear point. G)hat are you alled* little Jin# who omes to take my rownDH @ion slumped in the dust* li kin# pink laws. G2 am alled 'madi*H he said* Gand thou#h 2 am little* 2 am fier e.H G5e speaks truth*H @ion #rowled* for many other lions had ome to listen. GRemember him. 8or thou#h he ame to meet his death* 'madi Jin# is #reater for it.H @ion roared* leapin# for the Boy Jin#. Teeth like sabers* a Eu##ernaut of fan#s and laws* @ion embra ed the boy with li(in# kni(es. G'madi bra ed with his ready spear* point all sparkly. But* with an effortless bite* @ion de(oured him* spear and allLH Pops roared with toba o1stained dentures* #larin# down at me with that la0y* #lass eye. G5e was eatenD !id he really eat himDH 2 sFueaked out the Fuestion. Pops brushed his broom a ross my fa e. 2 tasted the obwebs and lumps of lint and filth. GSure wasL Th> hell you think happened* boyD Goin> up a#ainst an 'fri an lionCshit* Bu k* y>all need more sense than that.H 3y father lau#hed* but didn>t think it was funny. This hidden emotion he had* it eked out as if some stran#e disappointment surfa ed. Somethin# he>d arried with him always. 3ade me feel smaller than 2 was. E(en years after* 2 barely understood it. 2 Eust felt small. G-ow* what do you think happened after thatDH 5e pla ed his hand on my shoulder* firm #rip sFuee0in# my ollarbone. GThink hard* sFuirt.H G-othin#*H 2 said. G)ron#* boy*H he said without humor. G)ron#* wron#* wron#. 'in>t no su h thin# as nothin#. 7a hearD 2f you>d been listenin# you>d know that. !umbass kid.H 2 remember noddin#* wishin# for 2 don>t know e6a tly whatC all it a happy endin#. GThe prin e ne(er lost hold of his spear. 5e held it damn ti#ht* ti#hter than this.H 3y father #ripped the broom handle* wren hin# it until wooden splinters stu k into his palms. G5e split the

lion>s belly and spilled from the #uts of the Eun#le that at.H 2 waited* ima#inin# @ion>s entrails slitherin# from a fury* yellow underbelly. GE(ery man>s born twi e. !ies twi e too.H 3y father handed me a i#arette. GThe Prin e went on to lead as a Jin# shouldCdidn>t die a#ain Atil he was a hundred and ninety1nine.H Pops spoke while polishin# the stained #lass window. @ooked like Jesus was listenin# too* but 2 knew he weren>t. 2n the Fuiet* 2 wat hed my father shine the olorful window meti ulously. 'nd after it was done he took a few steps down the stool and said* G!on>t #et your panties in a twist* Bu k. Pie e a shit like you>ll #et a se ond han e too.H O S The road to "himayo wound throu#h a #host town. 2 had no trouble findin# it. The shade of thirsty trees hun# o(er the split tar of ne#le ted streets. "hain1linked fen es stit hed with sti ks rea hed from par hed earth and ra ked pa(ement. Tiny* rainbow windmills sFueaked in dead #ardens. "ri kets hirped on sunken rooftops. 'nd my tru k skidded to a stop. ' la0y plume of dust swirled o(er my 2talian boots like a drunken der(ish. 2 adEusted my a(iators and tapped free a kretek from its rinkled* paper offin. ' dirt path lead to an ar h and #ate made from baked adobe and twisted rebar. Somethin# stirred at the foot of the iron portal. 2 rubbed my eyes. Si6 mummified Ea krabbits nibbled the fresh* stinkin# flesh of si6 bloated (ultures in front of that #ate. "heeks pa ked with ma##oty meat* the rabbits spit feathers and looked at me with empty eye so kets. 2 waited* half e6pe tin# them to speak. 2 loaded 5arriet with pint1si0ed ball bearin#s and the last of my home1made per ussion aps. 5er .;; aliber heft put me at ease like no prayer e(er ould. 2 aimed at the rabbits* but didn>t fire. Si6 rows per hed three by three on lopsided adobe steeples* stared like a Eury with their minds made up. Golden sunli#ht dipped into the west behind them. GGonna take more than 0ombie rabbits to turn me ba k*H 2 told Aem. The lar#est row honked in reply and 2 passed throu#h the #ate and into the silent ourtyard where muddy* salty footprints lead me to the hapel. The buildin# was a portrait of ruination. Indone by time* lay bri ks oo0ed beneath the wei#ht of brittle timbers. )hisperin# s rat hed the insides of my ears. 2 ouldn>t say what was bein# said. So 2

i#nored it* sho(in# the swin#in# door open with my shoulder. 2 hit the wooden (ault hard. !oor wouldn>t bud#e. G-ot allowed*H a ri ket hattered. G-ot allowed. -ot allowed.H GThis is 'meri a* bud. 2>m allowed whate(er the fu k 2 want.H G-ot 'meri a*H it said. GRebub.H GRebub.H 2n a blink* 2 was fi(e years ba k. )ashed up ri(er like a wayfarin> salmon a#ainst the flow. 3emories* mind* and soul mi6ed up like a bloody* toothy martini. 2n the shadow of the hapel 2 saw thin#s 2 wanted for#otten. !arkness yawned* red andles sparkedCthe rypt and mausoleum stink permeated like the musky ada(erous perfume at a owboy>s wake. The albino* his #ristly skin ooked beneath my noseCthen a s ream: G2>m #onna su k out your fu kin# eyes* motherfu kerLH The hapel shimmied. )alls flaked to pie es. G)ho>s thereDH 2 felt a #loomy presen e reep behind me. Breath patted my ne k and nails bit my skin. -ausea bubbled up and a kind of hilly si kness knotted my balls and di k. 3y spine stiffened. 2 hadn>t been that hi#h sin e 4ietnam. GThey were sear hin# for this pla e*H 2 said. TheyCthe ultistsC'borek. ' bitter tapestry unfurled in my mind>s eye. Stit hed in sinew o(er an easel of bones* 2 re alled him* the su kin# Eowls of putrid damnation* a haoti ma hine of blood* flesh* and teeth. GThey were sear hin# for Rebub.H G'nd they found it*H a wispy (oi e slithered from beneath my feet. The presen e 2>d sensed. There the ruined remains of a man writhed in a mound of mus le* skin* and ro k salt. Grains spilled from his mouth as he spoke. Raspin# and hokin# ea h a#oni0in# syllable* ea h word was an oun e of the man>s endin# life. GTheir prayers were answered. They found "himayo whi h was Rebub before the world was split.H The man>s nubby knees ki ked the powder. )ith weak hands* he tou hed my feet* but as he did his fin#ers rumbled away. GTheir prayers were answers* but mine ne(er were. 3ine ne(er were.H 5is body unmade* the man shifted unnaturally and his rosary rattled. GJesus "hrist*H 2 knelt beside the monk. G-ot allowedLH The ri ket bu00ed into the #loom* ho(erin# o(er bendin# hur h pews and dan in# shadowy pillars. G7ou>re not allowed.H G2 see your dau#hters*H the monk ha ked. GThey>re playin# by the ri(er.H

3y head leared. G7ou want help* partnerDH 2t>s damn diffi ult to lo k eyes with dyin# men. Jnew that from the war. @ots of boys burned out. 7ou ne(er for#et a thin# like that. People ain>t people at the end. Just empty lamps as dark as oal. G7>all want me toCDH The #lint of 5arriet ast a mark of li#ht onto the man>s fa e. The monk shook his head. G-o.H 2 #lan ed the unnatural darkness shroudin# the pews in the tiny hur h. The adobe walls leaned une(enly* si#hin# inward and e6halin# like naked lun#s. 2 shook my head lear to make the mo(ement stop. 2t did. Suddenly the monk>s Eaw li ked aEar* ton#ue lashin#* and eyes stri ken with pani . G)hat is that aseDH 2 hadn>t noti ed 2 was arryin# it. The trumpet. Shit* it weren>t e(en hea(y. G-othin#*H 2 said. G-ot a hornDH he Fueried* hair driftin# from his skull. G9r trumpet.H G-o*H 2 lied. G!on>t let him take it. The 5erald ser(es the musi * not the player.H G-o worries* old timer.H 2 a(erted my eyes. The monk>s fa e slowly peeled away* fle ks of ashy skin wafted into the still air like pollen. GTake this ross* my son.H 5e handed me a wooden rosary and his fin#ers disinte#rated. 9n the ross* a Star of !a(id was et hed in bron0e. G2t will lead youKH he hoked to silen e* but ontinued for efully* GKto a hill and beneath it.H The remains of the monk sifted throu#h my hands* powdery and white* lea(in# behind only a heap of loose ash and sea salt. The room ontinued to bend like a funhouse mirror* shamblin# and rollin#* stret hin# and sFuee0in#. 2 fumbled for the monk>s rosary. G'lri#ht* you sorry sa k of shit.H 2 was talkin# to myself* not the poor bastard on the floor. GSo mu h for fu kin# enli#htenment.H O = The hapel bell had fallen into the rear emetery ourtyard. 2t stood perfe tly in(erted atop of mound of undisturbed earth e6posin# its hollow mouth* whi h was not hollow at all. Shri(eled orpses of son#birds* mostly larks and Eays* spilled from the lip like an o(erflowin# "hampa#ne flute. 'side from the toppled bell* #ra(estones were sta ked on top of one another in odd*

spiralin# patterns* markin# the way into a ma0e of tall* offin walls. Beyond that ma0e rose a lonely hill. Some of the offins were sta ked into stair ases* while others ar hed o(er themsel(es and formed pie emeal tunnels and passa#es that wound into the soil deeply. 2 heard e hoes beneath my footsteps. The earth beneath them was hollow. ' li h#ate kno ked a#ainst an unfastened lo k at the farthest ed#e of the ourtyard. 2t sat sFuarely beneath the hill on the near hori0on* framed by two* tombstone obelisks. GGuess that>s the way in*H 2 said heerlessly* shakin# salt from 5arriet>s barrel. The #ate moaned like a (ampire whore* whisperin# its own hideous lan#ua#e of ne#le ted wrou#ht iron artistry. 2 pa ed between the tombstone towers and read the names of monks* priests* and one bishop. -ear by* toppled stones ar hed o(er empty pits where splintered offins bloomed like dead* wooden arnations. 2 tasted formaldehyde on the air. G9f ourse the damn #ra(es are empty*H 2 said with a si#h* more disappointed than afraid. @oosened soil made for tri ky footwork. GShit*H 2 murmured* heel slippin# into another man>s footprint. G!ouble shit* ass fu kin> fu k nowLH 3ore footsteps spe kled the emetery. 2 didn>t do nothin# else but si#h. Then 2 saw him* slou hed beside a wall of mismat hed #ra(es sta ked (erti ally. The rooked skeleton s ribbled Fueer poetry onto the tomb1wall. "lothed in moldy* but eerily sparklin#* seFuen ed haps and ropin# shirt* the skeleton #rinned under a wide1brimmed hat* the front of whi h was turned upwards like a ookie A;=er 3iner. 5is leather boots with rusty spurs ratttled as he worked* and on his hip he wore a mud1pa ked #un belt* an a e of lubs stamped on the holster. G7ou>re himDH the skeleton hattered. GSaid you>d ha(e a de ent musta he.H 2 nodded with my #un poised* mind fi6ated on the s rawls of unfamiliar symbols markin# e(ery a(ailable surfa e. G5olster it. 2>m a damned waste of ammo.H The skeleton drew his bony fin#er o(er his rib a#e. To my utter amusement it sounded e6a tly like a fu kin# 6ylophone. GSo*H 2 said* Gwhat>s your deal* Roy Ro#ersDH 3y fin#er it hed to pull the tri##er* but 2 weren>t about to shoot a man in the ba k. !idn>t matter how dead he already was. G-ame>s Perry "arleton.H 5e outstret hed his hand for a shake. GJimmy Stewart shot me in

AQ; on the set of The (an 5rom Laramie$' GJimmy Stewart shot youD )hat are you kiddin# meDH !espite e(erythin#* 2 lau#hed. G7ep. 9(er a hea(y woman named Blan h.H Perry turned from his labors and eyed me without eyes. ' moth fluttered in the shadow of his brow rid#e. G2 woke up about ten minutes a#o with all this hi ken s rat h on my mind.H The skeleton returned to s ribblin#. GSay* 3ister. 7ou #ot a i#aretteDH GJust kreteks*H 2 held up the pa k of bla k smokes. G)hat the he k>s a kretekDH Perry asked. G2t>s sort of a "hinese i#arette or somethin#.H G2 ain>t omplain>* 3ister. @ordy knows those 9rientals an ook a du k.H The skeleton sniffed the kretek. GGosh darnitLH Perry ried. G-othin#L "an>t smell a #ull darn thin#.H 5e sniffed a#ain. G7ou #ot a mat h or whatDH G7eah.H 2 lit him up. GSo* you knew 2 was omin#* huhDH G"ri ket told me. Guess 2 for#ot they ould talk.H G5e say anythin# elseDH GThat 2 was supposed to stop youCthat is* after 2 finished my hore here.H Perry>s skeletal hand la ked a#ainst the butt of his holstered re(ol(er. 'nother pale moth fluttered from one of the hambers and into the #apin# bla kness of an e6posed tren h. G7ou>re #onna shoot meDH Palm sweat dripped alon# the oak panelin# of my &S;S>s handle. 3y fin#er twit hed. G7eahC)ell* noC)ell* yesL But not ri#ht away. 2>(e #ot to finish s ribblin> the #ibberish*H Perry hu kled and tra ed the #lyphs with a dead fin#er. GSure looks like E#yptian to me.H G"an>t Eust let me pass* huhDH G)ish 2 ould* Partner. But 2 made a deal with the ri ket. !ro(e a pretty hard bar#ain too.H Perry shook his skull. Salt rattled from his rooked Eaw and he ontinued to hisel s ripts into stone. The #lyphs smoldered like stoked embers as he wrote them. 2 stepped away and sauntered towards the lankin# #ate up the ma0e of #ra(es. ' web of shadows obs ured the summit of the hill* but my belly told me somethin# stirred there. G)aitLH Perry hattered an#rily. G7ou an>t #o up thereLH The skeleton palmed his pistol and drew. Two booms e hoed in the emetery* but only one slu# onne ted* shatterin# Perry>s dusty

skull. 5is bones went ri#id and lattered into a pile. 'nd moths went on floatin# away. O &% The li h#ate yawned aEar and ruel* ast1iron bars #rinned. The sound of skitterin# inse ts wel omed my boots onto a run hy arpet of beetles. ' rat hissed under my heel. 2 asked myself* )hyD )hy>d 2 ome to "himayoD 5ad no answer thou#h. -o real Fuestions beyond the Why either. Th> hell is why anyhow. The only real Fuestion is WhenD 3aybe ,ow? 3ade no differen e to me as 2 passed further throu#h the labyrinth of twisted stone and li(in# floor. 9ddly* 2 heard the rush of lear water and smelled the sweet* mu##y summer of pure 3ississippi. 'nd then* as if from a dream* 2 woke up. G!adLH their little (oi es himed. @aid out on the Fuilt my mama made* 2 wat hed 3innie and 3ay splash ea h other on the shore. G7>all wat h for turtles* nowLH 3y words dan ed on the bayou bree0e like daylily pedals. G'nd there>s hi ken when you two #et pe kish.H 8or#ot 2>d pa ked the hi ken. 2 fished throu#h the basket for a drumsti k and a beer. !amn* 3iss @ee sure ould fry a bird and there weren>t nothin> like a old one in July. G)e>re skippin# stones* !adLH 3ay ried* ra in# alon# the water* twirlin# like a shot1putter. 5er auburn hair boun ed beneath the slinkin# bran hes of the trees. GGet a EarLH 3innie replied* eyes bri#ht. 5er fre kles bun hed up o(er her nose as she e6amined the plume of li#htnin# bu#s wea(in# throu#h the air. G2t>s like a hu# of bu#s* !ad.H She #i##led as they urled around her. 2 shuffled down the bank with my bree hes folded up. 2 dumped the pi kle Eui e from our only Ear and used my #randdad>s foldin# knife to pun h holes in the lid. G!on>t at h too many* now. Those little fellers need breathin> room.H G9kay* !ad*H the #irls said in unison. 2 held Aem both lose as we wandered* steppin# o(er driftwood and wat hin# the trees han#e as the sun fell down. Starli#ht twinkled in the water* peekin# out in the showerin# twili#ht. )e laid on the blanket to#ether and 2 told Aem the names 2 knew. GThere>s S orpio. 5e>s sorta like a bu# but with pin hers like a rayfish. 'nd there>s "asa de pita.H G"assiopeiaH 3innie nibbled from a bo6 of raisins.

GShe was 'ndromeda>s mom*H 3ay added* rea hin# for 3innie>s raisins. GShe made the o ean #uy mad ause she was really pretty*H 3innie ontinued. GThen Perseus sa(ed her from that one #uy. Jinda like the monster.H 3ay finished the raisins. G2s there ho olateDH 3y #irls were smarter than their old man by bounds of the #lobe. 2 fi#ured maybe 2>d finally li(ed up to the moment. ' man>s man. 5ell* a womani0in#* piss1ant like myself only #ot so many shotsCfi#ured 2>d taken mine and hit the tar#et deadeye* bi#. ' star plummeted. Blue li#ht streaked a ross the sky. The #irls wrestled in the blankets and tried their best to keep awake. 2>d done ri#ht by Aem. 2t was all so damned pi turesFue. 3y beauties. The ri(er. 2 ba kstroked a ross the sky* #lidin# abo(e the shimmerin# 3ississippi e(enin#. 3innie and 3ay blinked and tried their best to ount the stars. Before lon# we fell asleep beneath them. 'nd then* without so mu h as a horn or a whistle* 2 woke up on the hill o(erlookin# "himayo. !ry* flaky loam pressed under my heels as 2 ame upon a rater* s arred by a lon# and narrow pit. Smoke bel hed from ra k like a busted steam pipe and alls 2 ould think was* That don>t look natural. G2t surely isn>t. -atural.H 3y short and urlies unfurled themsel(es* strait as pipe leaners. The (oi e was #hastly. GBut then a#ain* what is natural* reallyDH 2t boomed like a tremendous bolt of thunder* swellin# and re edin#. @an#ua#e failed me. The words written in my brain all the years of my life had been suddenly unwritten. Erased. Emptied. 2 #ripped the ross in my hand* #ripped my re(ol(er e(en ti#hterCbut 2 ouldn>t remember her name. GThe pistol>s name is 5arriet.H 5e knew her name* but what was mineD 2 ouldn>t re all. 2t>d been told to me* repeated a thousand times. 3y name was #one* pulled into the smokin# well of sulfur and pumi e. )ithout words 2 asked him* )hat>s my nameD GThat 2 an>t say. 7ours is not written in the Book of @ifeCor the Book of !eath. 2 wonder*H he said and paused* Gwhat star are you that falls before meD "ome with my trumpet are youDH The ase was hea(ier. ' phantom hand pulled upon it.

GPerhaps it>s a #iftD 9r is it a le(er ployDH The shadows pooled. G2 think it>s a ploy. 2>ll permit that* little spark. But* 2 assure youCyou>ll fail.H ' fi#ure emer#ed darkly as a drawn owl. ' midni#ht shroud* obs ured by a inderin# loak of bla kened soot and amber fire. 5e was taller than me* mu h taller* with a bare hest* and tattooed by the familiar marks on the tomb1walls below. 2t wasn>t until he stepped loser that 2 noti ed folded win#s* bla k as a row* harred and smolderin#. GSpeak* 'n#el. 8or we are brothers.H 9ny6 pinions outstret hed as his bare1feet rested on shamblin# earth. G7ou aren>t familiar to me* yet you arry my instrument. "ome in 5is name no doubt. !on>t be bashful. Be Proud.H G2 an>t say*H 2 said. GTell me your name. 3ine is surely known to you.H 2 dropped the trumpet ase in the dust and raised my pistol. G2t sure ain>t familiar. )ho you supposed to beD 'nother wha k Eob munsterD @et me #uess* a fu kin> possessed hoirboyD 2 seen it all* bud. )hat the fu k is it nowDH 4eins of molten fire flashed amidst feathers of ash. G2 am the Jin# of Rebub. @ord of the 8lies* God of Ekron who was a sentinel of 5esperus and Bane to 5ebrew Jin#s.H The sky shrank to the si0e of a pinhead. GBy my word priests shall lust and tyrants shall rise. The hea(ens shall Fuake at the soundin# of my name. Jin#* 2 am eFual to @e(iathanKthou#h humbled only before 3ornin# Star. 2 am 'braham>s thirsty blade* 'ha0iah>s "oun il. 2 am the "arpenter>s -ails.H 2 paused. G-ope* it ain>t din#in#.H G3ine is Ba>al RebubLH 9n e twinklin# stars abo(e the hill at "himayo went dark and the midni#ht (ale of an e(erlastin# ni#ht re(ealed to me an utter emptiness. The world si#hed as thou#h weepin# for the whole of her lost flo k. 'nd 2 knew to my ore* to the pink ru# of my Fui(erin# or#ansC2 was in some deep ass shit. G2 tire* little sparkL )hat star are you that would hallen#eD 2 lon# to know thy name* that 2 may sin# it at thy fall.H G-ame>s Bu ky Solomon !ennis. 'nd 2>m a @eo* bud.H Ba>al Rebub lau#hed entirely to himself. G5e sends another manD 'nd not e(en a son.H 5is eyes narrowed* brilliant as baleful harms. G2 hate your name*H he said. GGi(e me the trumpet. The time is upon us to hasten the end of all thin#s.H

G)hat you want with it anywayD 7our ronies killed de ent folks* you knowDH 3y eyes lo ked the dusty ase. Ea h brass lat h snapped open. The lid flun# ba k and the trumpet was naked to the desert wind. GTry it* bud. 'nd 2>ll #rease the pa(ement with your brains. 2>ll show you what a man an do.H 2 played it bold. 8u k him and his unholy* pompous* bull pu ky. G7ou are not a man*H Ba>al Rebub ooed. G7ou>re a pillar of salt.H ' pan# of searin# heat s or hed my spine* onstri tin# my mus les and sFuee0in# my or#ans. 2>d ne(er felt my spleen before* nor my al ohol soaked kidneys or bla kened lun#s. They spoke to me then* and ea h one asked: G)hat the fu k is #oin# onDH 2 was a 3oloto( martini. Pain shook me like a paint mi6er on fire. G'in>t you #onna offer me a plea bar#ain or somethin#Csoul for a breakD ">mon nowLH 2 hoked* feelin# my fin#ers bend ba kwards. G-ot my department* 2>m afraid.H Ba>al Rebub>s #a0e turned to the #rubby trumpet. G-ow the instrument*H he said. G7our God has written your fate already and hidden it behind Se(en Seals. Se(en 4ials. 'nd Se(en Sterlin# Trumpets.H G!on>t look too sterlin# to me.H 3y #uts started to pi kle. 2 knew it be ause my breath smelled like (ine#ar. GE(en in death you>re defiant. 2 almost admire you himps. So brief* but so passionate.H The demon>s fin#er rea hed to the trumpet and it soared into his hands. G'in>t the end* yet. )orld>s not done. There>s lots a folks ain>t e(en seen 5awaii.H G2 hold in my hand the instrument of doom. Bask in the ruin of 5is work. @isten arefully* little spark. @isten to the )orld>s @ullaby* for it shall be the last that>s e(er heard.H Ba>al Rebub pursed his olorless lips and blew. 'nd the trumpet sounded* blarin# o(er the hill and into the sky* beyond the milky urtain drawn o(er the hea(ens and the earth. The sky be ame as a lookin# #lass and 2 peered beyond into a bri#htness 2 an>t dutifully des ribe. 'nd from that #lass an an#el ame and in his ri#ht hand he brou#ht a #olden key that burned bri#htly as the -ew 3e6i an sun. Salty spittle dribbled from my ottonmouth. 2 fired my .;;Ca wild* re kless shot into the blindin# luminosity. 3y bullet (anished. The sky went dark. But the an#el approa hed still* floatin# #ra efully as a flake of snow. Ba>al Rebub wat hed the an#el* but the an#el didn>t* or wouldn>t* look at him. 2nstead* the

an#el tilted his head to me* e6pressionless. 5e was the prettiest man 2>d e(er seen. @iftin# the #olden key with #reat effort* he pla ed it into the sulfurous fissure. The ra k bubbled. Ba>al Rebub tossed the trumpet. GInleash himLH he shouted. 'nd the an#el did. The bottomless pit yawned a arni(orous maw* smoke floodin# from it* and lo usts with tails like s orpions. Ba>al Rebub ushered them forth* ondu tin# with a bla k sword drawn from shadows ast by a tower of fire. G'baddon is omeL )at h* mortal. See the world onsumedLH Ba>al Rebub hided* eyes fi6ed on the an#el. But* the an#el didn>t speak* nor did he yet a knowled#e the demon>s #a0e. )hite robes drew ba k and i(ory win#s arried the an#el into a sparklin# as ension. God* 2 thou#ht* 7ou rat bastard* ill1mannered* son of a bit h. 3y bleedin# ton#ue wri##led like a worm on a hot sidewalk. 8u k off* 2 told 5im. Turn your ba k on meD See if 2 #i(e a damn. 8ate my ass. 'in>t no fate but what 2 make* babe. 8u k off* hief. This Eoker>s mine. @o usts (omited from the abyss* bu00in# in in omprehensible multitudes. Their s ream split the sky and #round my ears like ten* hundred million mul hed up offee beans. 2 dred#ed. 3y #ood fist #rasped the monk>s lu ky ross. 2 almost pit hed the damn thin#. 2 almost hu ked it into the horrible hasm. But a hoarse* lo(eless (oi e in the ba k of my mind stayed my hand. 2 don>t know if it were real or fabri ated* but 2 heard my daddy>s words. 'nd he said all #ruff1like* GPie e a shit like you>ll #et a se ond han e too.H The rosary beads rumbled my fist like hot* holy mara as and a #ood (ibe hit me* real sudden1like and without mu h warnin#. 2 #ot mean* real ornery* and my insides almed a bit. GGonna take more than a pin h of salt to kno k me out.H 2 smiled meanly* su kin# white #rit from between my len hed teeth. 3y knees kno ked to#ether in the wind and 2 dusted my hands lean. GThat all you #otDH The horror of antiFuity swi(eled his #hastly head* rowned by a halo of fire. 2 walked the rosary like a yo1yo. G5oly wood* babe.H 5e #awked at me. G-ow.H 2 paused for effe t. G7>all #onna man upD 9r ain>t you #ot the stonesDH The fallen fiend drew ba k win#s of blindin# flame and the foul* an#eli marks si00led in his

hest. The li#ht within his eyes went dark like two andles stamped out by wet fin#ers. 5is thunderin# feet split the earth. G3anD 3'-DH he bellowed. G3an*H 2 hooted* smirkin> like a rodeo lown. Ba>al Rebub mo(ed impossibly fast* fin#ers stabbin# into my throat* hot as fire1pokers. -o time to sti k up my mitts* no time for a su ker Eab* the demon meant business. 5e tossed me like a ra#doll* shakin# my limp body and whippin# me to the #round. Ribs ra ked* shoulder popped* and #lobs of blood blinded me in one eye. )hen he let #o* 2 felt the steamin# pressure of the burstin# abyssCa blisterin#* ra klin# rush of hell>s stinkin# breath. The lo usts skittered o(er me* ea h poised to stin#. 2 sFuinted towards Ba>al. 5e stared almost tenderly. GThat itD That all you #otDH 2 ho ked a bloody loo#ie. Ba>al Rebub sneered and with little effort the towerin# demon nud#ed me o(er the lip of the fall. 'nd 2 fell drownin# into (ol ani fury. 5ell swallowed me. Bu ky !ennis was little more than a flounderin# ma kerel in the mouth of a satani peli an. 2 an>t say how lon# it took. The fall seemed like fore(er. But e(entually* e(entually 2 hit ro k bottom. Stiflin# heat pressed my hest like the wei#ht of an in(isible an(il. !espite the s or hin# heat of the pla e* 2 saw no fire. Sharp pains in my ba k kno ked me like steel toe boots. Bones writhed* #rindin# to#ether beneath me. Stiff* skeletal fin#ers tore at my lothes. !arkness blanketed me like my dead mama>s Fuilt. Then 2 saw them* driftin# loselyCshort* shadowy spe ters. 3y dau#hters. G-o*H 2 wept. 3y tears e(aporated. G3y beauties. 7>all don>t belon# here. -ot here.H Skeleton Eaws #aped like be##in# do#s* #ummin# at my ankles* tu##in# at my bree hes* weak* wobblin#Cthey were a symphony of hopeless desperation. GBabies* y>all don>t belon# here.H 2>d ha(e shot myself* sure as 2 was shakin#. 2>d ha(e shot myself in the head and painted the floor with my mad mind. The skeletons s rat hed broken syllables* words unra(elin# like kite strin# into the sinkin# spiral of their min#lin# ada(ers. 3innie and 3ay were loser than they>d been in years. 2 smelled their hair* felt the ool tou h of tiny hands strokin# my soakin# fa e. They kissed my head and hands* held me. 2 wept*

my shamblin# body empty of reason* my Fui(erin# soul shrunken into a olorless pellet. 'nd then they spoke. GTake it* !addy.H 3ay kissed my hand. The skeletons lawed ea h other* pullin# furiously* rea hin#Cea h fi#htin# the other to stay aloft in the (orte6. The losest one mumbled* G)ho is Bu ky !ennisDH ' #lint birthed from the sinkin# mound. 2t was the #olden key. The skeletons sa rifi ed one another to keep the key from sinkin# into themsel(es* offerin# what little was left of themsel(es* #i(in# up the fleetin# reprie(e of the surfa e. GTake it* !addy*H 3innie ur#ed me. The key burned bri#htly* untarnished by the unyieldin# urtain of damnation. 2 rea hed for the blinkin# world abo(e* that brilliantly shrinkin# doorway. 2 was arried hi#her and found sure footin# on une(en #round. Skeletons wailed silently* embra in# one another* interlo kin# their shamblin# pie es into a #rim pu00le of steps. 2 pulled the key from the murk and my dau#hter>s (oi es were suddenly hushed by the turmoil of stormin# hellfire. 2 limbed the undead stair ase. The skeletons helped* pushin#* #i(in# their last efforts to me. The further 2 as ended* the more (iolently the key (ibrated. 2t hummed like a tunin# fork* rin#in# and sin#in#. 2n that shinin# instant* 2 limbed from the ultimate brink to the harrowin# brimC ba k into the world. The bottomless pit #roused and wret hed* drawin# in breaths of s ramblin# swarms. )ithout the key* the abyss hun#ered. !esperate ritters tore my boots off as the #apin# mouth de(oured them. The rift sealed and a #reat wei#ht lifted from me as the earth was sewn a#ainC that is before another #reat wei#ht damn near busted my ribs. GBeware my si#ht* filthy himp of 'brahamLH Ba>al Rebub #rowled. GSelf1ri#hteous fu kLH 2 sank into the #round* rushed into a sinkin# hole by the demon>s tremendous stren#th. Smolderin# toes seared my hest hair. 3y Asta he urled ba kward. G2>ll sow sorrows indes ribable and star(e your mind of sanity.H 5ot* innamon breath rushed my nose. GBehold hidden pla esL Realms maddenin#L 5ushed only by shallow #asps of despairLH Ba>al Rebub peered into my eyes. 2 saw only myself. 8i#hts 2>d been in* women 2>d shed like rattler skin. Boo0in#* heatin# at ardsC2 saw my foulest moments. 3y wife took the #irls. 2 saw the rashin# )inneba#o* hurled

like a mat hbo6 ar to a fiery* man#led mess of meat* steel* and Ple6i#las. GGa0e your refle tion in the (era ious pool. -e(er unsee your flesh throu#h the eyes of a 8allen God.H 2 stared into a (a uum of horrors beyond my ima#inin#. 3ountains fell* rumblin# like sand astles into the sea. The plains of 'meri a ra ked and 2 heard a million ries as the shadow of a lumberin# olossus sulked somberly o(er the dead west. Earth and soil disappeared into the plummetin# depths of hasms and Fuakes. 3en swun# from e(ery burnin# tree* dan#lin# like se(ered piano wire. They were dried up like mummies de(oid of life* de(oid of soul. ' smokin# skull a kled. ' #aunt hound howled. E(ery #ra(e sat empty. Tendrils of darkness wrapped around my thumpin# heart* slitherin# into ea h pumpin# hamber like parasites. Bloody seas bree hed the le(ies and spilled boilin# death onto the streets and into houses. The moonli#ht faded and trees toppled like dominoes. Tears showered me from the sky. ' lone hild sta##ered from an open hole with bloody feet and knees. G2 shall embra e you with kni(es*H whispered the 8allen. 5e s rat hed like an old timey radio. G'nd you shall thank me before the end.H 5oldin# my breath* 2 plun#ed into milky water. The depths sFuee0ed me* my lun#s filled with fluidC2 was drownin#* sinkin# into the nothin#ness from when e we>d all ame. 3y Eue(oes a hed. Then suddenly* 2 felt a stiff Eolt. 'nd like a sober offee sma kin> your ton#ue* 2 woke up. G2mpossible*H Ba>al Rebub muttered. Seethin# heat pumped my heart. 2 took a lon# breath. G8ilthy himpLH 5e who se ond only to the 3ornin# Star blinked tears of ash. G?uit allin> me himpLH Stren#th returned to my fists and with a ri#ht hook* 2 damn near #au#ed out the demon>s eye. 3y fi(e1fin#ered Bui k onne ted a#ain. Bla k blood spurted from Ba>al>s kisser. 5e let me #o. G!efiant and brashLH Ba>al Rebub raked my hest* sli in# fabri and drawin# life. 5e pummeled as hard as one of them hammer bell1din#ers at the fair. 2 dod#ed left and stepped up to bat like the late* #reat Bambino. 2 whirred up a swin# e6 ept it weren>t no @ouis(ille Slu##er in my hands* it was the shimmerin# Jey to the Bottomless Pit. The demon sFuinted* shieldin# his eyes as he thundered nearer. G2nsi#nifi ant fle11LH 2 swun# the key and motherfu kin> B993L )hat a hit. G5omerun* babe.H

Bla k feathers s attered as the fiend tumbled head o(er heels ba kwards towards the smokin# pit. 'stonishment painted his fa e* disbelief and utter perple6ity. 'n ient blood spilled onto the earth in si00lin# bursts of blue flame. )ith re kless abandon the demon stormed throu#h the hurri ane of hellfire and inse ts. The tumultuous #yre e6haled sulfurous spouts and skitterin# madness. Smokin# destru tion split the inderin# hill in two. G7ou ain>t so badLH 2 ried* swin#in# a#ain. B993L The demon>s arm snapped. Bla k bone broke* throu#h his olorless flesh and spilled unholy life into the pit. B993L B993L Ba>al Rebub roared* inhuman and monstrous* barin# fan#s of molten pit h. Swoopin#* he snat hed my arm. GEye for an eyeLH he said* and snapped my forearm like a Popsi le sti k. 2 yelped and lost my limp hold on the key. GGod* 'lmi#htyLH 2 moaned* rippled with pain. GGod won>t sa(e you* wormL 5e pokes and prods* but ne(er #ripsLH The demon took my other arm* wren hin# it with a pop from my shoulder so ket. G)here is your defian e nowD )here is the 3'-DH 'rms like noodles* 2 fin#ered the shinin# tooth of the keyB it (ibrated and hummed. G7ou>re spent.H The demon pier ed my heek with one of his nails. 2t bled and burned. GSo soft and brief. So flawed. 5ow ould your Trisha e(er lo(e su h a wret hed thin#DH GTh> hell did you Eust sayDH 9ne of my teeth wobbled in my Eaw. 3y musta he twit hed. 'nd my heart i#nited like an atom bomb* Eust twel(e in hes from where my brass balls la ked to#ether like pineapple #renades. G2>ll (isit her flesh for you. 2>ll #ripL 'nd 2>ll twistLH 5e broke my dan#lin# limb. Shards of bone tore mus le* ripped tissue* and damn near sprun# from my bruised skin. G'nd on e 2>(e spent herD 2>ll wear her supple skin like a loak and (isit youLH -o feelin# left in either hand* 2 ouldn>t feel my fists ball upConly my iron will told me they>d done so. 8ire s ored my ankles. The hill Fuaked to pie es beneath my toes. The sky warped* flounderin# like a ra##ed fla# as starless and sad as infinite spa e. 2n that moment the world ended amidst a maelstrom of ra(enous haos. 3y soul i#nited like a poolside sparkler* erupted like a roman andle* and blasted like an laymore mine on P"P. So* 2 ki ked up a fuss and #rabbed Ba>al Rebub by the ne k. G5eyLH 2 stared into his a(ernous pupils. G-ow you>(e really pissed me off.H

Throwin# him into the dust* his win#s rumpled* 2 fished for the #olden key and swun# like a wildman. 2 beat hard* fast* and furiousCstrikin# Ba>al Rebub>s wits out* ra kin# his left win# until it broke lean off in a flare of smolderin# soot. G)here you #onna fly nowD 7ou ain>t so badL 7ou ain>t so fu kin> badLH 2 lashed* rushed and blasted the fallen an#el ba k into the hokin# hasm. The demon looked himself o(er in the mirror finished of my a(iator #lasses. The fear of wrathful God refle ted ba k at him. 5is own damn fear. 'nd in that stiflin# instant Ba>al Rebub* Enemy of 'braham knew his #oose was ooked. The 8allen lawed the lip of the pit* s ramblin# desperately. G)aitLH he pleaded. @iFuid midni#ht oo0ed from his nose. G3er yL 3er y of the @aCLH 2 steadied myself and swun# away* astin# out the hollerin# horror. 5ell swallowed him and slurped the remainin# apo alypti swarm of 'baddon into the harrowin# inferno. 2 dropped to my knees. 3y breaths were few and fettered. G2 ain>t no @amb.H 2 laid ba k into the soft earth. G2 ain>t no @amb.H O && 3y lun#s filled too fast. They sputtered in my hest a(ity like deflatin# balloonsCfelt a lot like drownin#. Swallowin# ea h breath was like #ulpin# a fist full of nails. 2 tasted warm iron on my ton#ue and my sensation of tou h dulled. "ouldn>t feel my hands no more* pe ker neither. The summit was starless. 2 ra(ed a Rainbow menthol. Beer too* but 2 weren>t about to dream. 9ne bitter puff of a an er sti k* that tan#y mentholCthen maybe that hill wouldn>t ha(e seemed so damn old. )ell* 2 thou#ht. )hat to think about when your last moments ome haulin> inD 2 took ount of thin#s* deeds and su h. 5orrors too. )ound my self up with a fantasy about TrishCwearin# somethin# skimpy. 5ell* e(en food rawled in* a heapin# pile of "aEun rawdads. But really* 2 flushed myself lean of worldly pleasures ri#ht Fui k and fo used on my babies. 2n the distan e* past the emetery yard where the old hapel stood stoutly* the #entle strum of a steel #uitar wafted like a (el(et feather into my ear. 'nd 2 thou#ht* !amn* 2>m #oin> down and darkly. G@ooks that way* don>t itDH The silhouette of a tall man rose o(er the hill* ba klit by a dreamy* white sheen. GBut that>s alri#ht.H

2 nud#ed my a(iators off of my nose with a Eolt. G2s thatDH 3y heart fluttered. G're youDH "rin#in#* 2 sat up and leaned a#ainst a mound of lay. G3r. "ashDH Emer#in# from the #low* Johnny "ash plu ked a hord and sat down on an old stone beside me. !amndest thin# 2>d e(er seen. 5is perfe t hair wa(ed at me* framed by perfe t hops and a pearly smile. 5e wore a bla k suit* Te6as tie* and wielded a shinin#* sil(er #uitar. G2 ain>t Johnny "ash*H he said. G8i#ured 2>d pop in thou#h.H G7eahD Then who are youDH The man smiled. G7ou know. 't least you should* after all them shenani#ans.H Johnny "ash strummed* pointin# his i(ory frets towards the #olden key. G7ou did a man>s Eob* Bu k. 2>m darn proud.H G)hat are you doin> hereDH 2 strained for the softpa k in my rear po ket. GShit.H G)ell* the man omes around e(ery now and a#ain*H Johnny said* and at that time* 2 didn>t #et the Eoke. G5ow you doin>* ompadreDH G2 ould use a smoke.H 2 nodded in the dire tion of my Eeans. G7eahDH "uppin# my butt* 5e pulled the i#arette pa k free. 5e tapped it a#ainst a wrinkled palm and pla ed the filter in my mouth tenderly. GGod* damn it.H 2 sear hed for a li#ht. G7ou #ot aCDH Johnny "ash>s et hed pewter li#hter fli kered under his beEeweled thumb. G!on>t blaspheme* now*H he said* smilin#. G7ou feelin> alri#ht about thin#sD 7ou know* ir umstan es aside.H GShit* bud*H 2 mumbled* i# han#in#. G-o offense* but* th> hell you thinkDH Johnny lau#hed. G7eah* 2 hear you. Thin#s are tou#h. !on>t think 2 don>t know it. But @ife>s darn rewardin> when you>(e #ot the lyri s ri#ht.H The soft murmur of a hoir floated from abo(e us* like none 2>d e(er heard* like none 2>d hear a#ain. G)hat is thatDH 2 blew smoked into he li#htless sky. GThose are my ba k up sin#ers. Just doin> a little ditty for you* Bu k.H 3y hest bu kled* lun#s sloshin# with smoke and blood. GGod damn.H 2 hoked and spit red onto the dirt. Johnny "ash wiped my lips lean of blood with a white handker hief* but the stain didn>t take. G2>ll let that one slide* okayDH 5e was still nothin# but smiles.

G2>m dyin#*H 2 said* emotionless. Johnny knelt loser. G7eah* you are. But that>s okay.H 5is #entle strin#s sun# and an#els on hi#h a ompanied with a most perfe t harmony. G7ou wanna know one of my fa(orite se rets to the uni(erseDH 2 didn>t answer. G2t ain>t half bad* either. Promise.H Johnny "ash rossed his heart. GThis one always heers me up when 2>m blue.H 2 Eust listened* wat hin# his kind wrinkles sFuish and stret h as he sFuinted. GSee* there>s a whole lot of want. )hole lot of need. 'nd whole lot that don>t #o ri#ht for folksC#ood and bad alike*H "ash paused and played* his alloused fin#ers dan ed o(er the strin#s like attails strummin# the ri(er. GThe #reat thin# is*H he whispered* Fuieter than a mouse so as no one else would e(er hear. GE(erythin# works out in the endCE(ery little thin#.H Inder the #iant sky 2 stret hed* ontent beneath the sparklin# li#hts sprin#in# amidst the louds like andles. GGodKH 2 said* swept away by the elestial (i#il. G2>m listenin#*H 5e said. G2 want my family ba k.H G2 know you do.H The son# Fuieted. )hen 2 spoke a#ain there weren>t any words to follow. 2 fli kered out* no lon#er drownin#. 2 swam in deep* hauntin# waters as fresh as dew and warm as the summer. 8allin# sleepily into the silken darkness* 2 embra ed a blanketin# (astness 2 annot here des ribe. 'nd as the final piper piped and 5is #olden strin#s went still* 2>d be lyin# if 2 told you 2 didn>t see a li#ht. *****

OTHE%S ))))) D TE #ITH ED# %D HE%BE%T

Edward 5erbert ate his thumb* a thumb he>d had within a pie. The pie was older than his

apartment* thou#h not as old as the weather* whi h ould ha(e been debated* dependin#. 5is thumb was bulbous* #ourdish and tou#h: it looked rather like a turnip* thou#h not Fuite unlike a truffle. 2t was salty sweet* as turnips #o* thou#h bitter as a daisy. 5e wasn>t entirely sure of this howe(er* thou#h he>d eaten one of those in his youth. Edward>s hins shook wildly* all do0en1teen or so. They were pat hed with #rayin# stubble* some lon# some short* thou#h all unkempt and soiled. 2f he had ea#le>s eyes he>d be able to see them ti#htly urled about the arpet* imbedded like the roots of tiny trees planted firmly in fields of sha##y Jentu ky blue#rass. The re ord player skipped: 'in>t #ot a worry down in 4erny. 'in>t #ot a worry down in 4erny. The kno ker kno ked and Edward s uffled out of bed* the sheets like hains* floor like i e. 5is shoeless feet were swollen and smelled of fish and #arli powder. They were two enormous bass* the toes wa##lin# as they strode* flounderin# as thou#h 3r. 5erbert hadn>t ontrol o(er them in the least. 5is belly pressed a#ainst the door as a lonely beady eye peered throu#h the peephole. There was a woman* elder* trim* toothless* thou#h sportin#* what Edward always suspe ted to be* two of the falsest breasts to be implanted in a human bein#. They ould ha(e been ar(ed from edar and still maintain the effe t. 2n her arms she held a hild* round* pink* and wailin# like a banshee. Jno k. Jno k. Edward tapped ba k. 2t was a Eest of ourse* some modi um of humorB a pitiful attempt at flirtation with a woman* whose body had dwelled on the earth* undeniably* as lon# or lon#er than 2mhotep. She was not amused in the least* rather* she was haunted* and her fa e twin#ed as she smiled emptily. The smile was e(er so subtle* thou#h still enou#h to ra k the dried makeup on her fa e* as thou#h lar#e ra(ines and fissures had slid open by the work of some un#odly Fuake. She shifted in the doorway* her fa e distorted and orpulent as she peered into the miniature window holeB it was not unlike some tri k mirror lo ked deep in the belly of some arnies> beat up ford. Edward unlat hed the door and the hin#es stiffly reaked open. The battered e6terior of the door shone la(ender a#ainst the dim li#ht in the hall. The woman asked him to keep it down. She ursed him for wakin# the baby. 'nd said some other thin#s* and asked Fuestions. The burble of her (oi e strun# out in hi#h and low tones* as his droopy sunken eyes* wei#hted by desire* fell upon her plasti hest. They were painted* he ould see* like her fa e* but they were smooth and buoyant. 5e found himself be#innin# to tense as he losed the door on her1 she was still

hatterin# like an old row. Ei#ht di#its leftB and a pinkie. 5e ounted and swallowed. 5e tossed away the an of soup and opened another. 5e>d lon# disliked the taste of hot soup* or perhaps he simply didn>t are. The #as had not been on for nearly a month. The rumbs of ra kers amassed like a sandy shore on his belly* se(eral bo6es worth. 'nd as he slurped up the remainder of the se ond an* he sniffled and leared his throat. 5e pressed the red button on his re order and sat a moment. 5e thou#ht. 'nd he waited. 5e stood up and wobbled towards the windowsill. There was a plant there* lon# dead* a dried up shrub of some spe ies he>d ne(er know the name. 5e raised the re order to his mouth* and peerin# out of the dusty blinds he said nothin#. 5e looked down and e6amined the sta#nant water in the waterin# an* then he sat ba k down* this time on the ed#e of his bed. There was a pile of unopened mail and a lar#e par el wrapped ti#ht with a white ord. 9n it he read his name: 3r. Edward 5erbert. 5e lifted it up and put it ba k down* then lifted it a#ain. The wei#ht of it was hea(y* thou#h not unwieldy* yet still he ould not lift it for lon#. 5e shook it near his ear like some hild probin# beneath a "hristmas tree for a set of buildin# blo ks* or a pop #un. 5e listened to the rattlin# parts for some time* until at last his massi(e arm be#an to tremble and wobble like a #elatinous tendril. 5e dropped it on the bed and it boun ed and shook a moment. 5e then de(oured two middles* two fores* and a rin#. @oun#in# on his sofa* the onstant ooin# of pi#eons kept the orpulent man sleepless. The little monsters ne(er eased to roost beneath the #utters that shaded his bal ony. 5e despised the little thin#s* as they fluttered and defe ated* reprodu ed and a#ain defe ated. 2t was as thou#h* that pla e* luttered with old ma#a0ines and so##y ard board bo6es* had some otherworldly allin# to them. Edward ounted sheep for a while* but was unable to sleep. Sheep ountin# was an interestin# notion. 5e>d ne(er on e #i(en it thou#ht until that moment* when instead of sheep he de ided to ount pi#eons. )hat was the purpose of sheepD 5e didn>t know. 5e only knew that in the animal kin#dom* on a s ale of whi h he was unsure* sheep were (ery stupid. Pi#eons were stupid too. 5e pondered and s rat hed under his belly* probin# at an a#e1old s ab that ne(er healed. 9ne* two* three* fourKuntil at lon# last* he fell suddenly asleep. 5e dreamed of many odd and urious thin#s: of kin#doms* and andy* and soup. 5e was in a perfe t state then. 5e ould bend the dream to his will* and he ould hoose to de(our what he wished: and that>s a rare thin#. 5e ould dream himself strollin# in pastures and fieldsB he

ould dream himself makin# lo(e to whome(er. 5e ould dream himself flyin#* thou#h fallin# was mu h easier* and he ould dream in the dream until he>d died. Pi#eons* he re alled* ould dama#e the roofs of houses if not kept in he k. 'nd behold there stood a #ar#antuan bird* with a mane of white pluff (ibratin# at hi#h speeds in the wind. Edward #asped and looked into the demonia as it spoke in somethin# not unlike Spanish or Portu#uese. 5e hu kled* thou#h petrified* he stood* a stone* steadfast but not in oura#e* more in apa itated. 2t pe ked and probed and shat upon hu#e ma#a0ines with T.4. fa es and breastsB and it nested in monolithi so##y bo6es* where on e bi y le parts or a swin# set had been. 3r. 5erbert heard his name* 3r. Edward Phillip 5erbert. 5e replied but from that reply there ame no reply. The telephone needed pi kin# up. 5e rose from the sofa and near the ni#htstand* ne6t to an old an of soup* there ran# an older telephone. 5e looked at it and lifted it to his ear. 5e ould hear the shrill (oi e of a man on the other end. The man seemed as distant as thou#h he were speakin# from a dream. Edward didn>t respond to his Fuestions. 5e Eust listened* listened to see what the man may say. Trustin# stran#ers an be stran#er than trustin# dreams* unless of ourse it>s a stran#er>s dream* and that>s a stran#e idea. The man raised his (oi e and rambled for a time* and Edward hun# up. The himes of the athedral droned on and on for a minute or so* and oupled with the skippin# re ord* Edward 5erbert found himself out of hara ter. 5e was annoyed. 5e remo(ed the re ord and pla ed his hands o(er his ears. They were moist and oily* and they slid ba k and forth* in strife he plu ked them off and de(oured them. They were deli ious he noti ed* seemin#ly brimmin# with the essen e of thyme* but the #reatest* the most breathtakin# part was the silen e. Edward ould see the shakin# front door* he ould feel the (ibrations of the kno ker* thwa kin#* and la kin#. 5e probed the door with his remainin# fin#ers and peered out to see the putrid fa e. 5e ouldn>t hear himself tappin# ba k* and after a few moments past before he left the door and rept into his bed. The #rayin# wrappers of an ient andy filled the sheets like the feathery down stuffin# in a pillow* and as Edward 5erbert slid his body in* innumerable wrinkled wa6 papers fell onto the floor. 5e #lan ed down* seein# the mounds and then laid his head ba k upon his pillow. 9n the eilin# water spots and ra ks dan ed a ross the surfa e as he tu##ed the lamp li#ht off. The shadowy fi#ures made fa es at him and he felt fri#htened briefly. 5is stoma h rumbled as it did* and he passed wind. 2t made him hu kle* but he ouldn>t hear it.

5e opened a Ear of Spanish oli(es and put them on his fin#ers* lumsily. 5e su ked ea h one off* fin#er and all* and swallowed them whole. The salty (inai#rette taste lin#ered metalli * and he bel hed. The s ent was hideous and he felt ill so he ate his nose and shut his eyes ti#htly as he lay silent and distant. Sprin#s oiled so ti#htly that* on o asion they would rook and bu kle under his wei#ht. 2t happened more freFuently in the last few days and it seemed funny* if not a trifle sad. Edward looked at the eilin#* tryin# to listen to the sprin#s* and he probed with un anny effort beneath his enormous body to feel the sprin#s but ould not. 5e shifted* and shifted a#ain* his mo(ements playin# tri ks on the mind. Shadowy pi#eons fluttered abo(e him* feathers seamin# to float all about him. 5e ate his eyes* not unlike the oli(es and he felt at pea e a#ain* in the darkness. Salty sweet* (ine#ar pun#ent* metal mouth and brandy* fin#er li kin# -ew En#land #rade* Fuail>s eyes or monkeyD 5e ouldn>t Fuite make out the rollin# ton#ue within his hatterin# teeth* its tiny folli les1or somethin# else1were Fuestionin# his mind. 5e thou#ht on it* for a few minutes* wonderin# what breast milk was like* and tried to remember* thou#h there was no answer for that. 2t may be worms or somethin# earthy* somethin# (ile si k or foul: this was an interestin# feelin#. @ike li kin# blood from paper uts* or tin an lids* or from a shirt or wrist band* these were all possibilities. 2t was more interestin# than musi * he de idedB he was ontented. Edward Phillip 5erbert shi(ered and pulled phantom sheets filled with wa6y butterflies* up to his portly ne k. 5e tried to lean his teeth with his e6traordinarily stron# ton#ue* but it was little use. 5e mana#ed to dislod#e parti les of somethin#* plaFue or rud or somethin#* and he swallowed it down. 5e swallowed spittle o(er and a#ain* but soon the spittle ran dry. So* Edward 5erbert swallowed his ton#ue. *****

ON SOUTHE%N GOTHIC
*****

SOUTHE%N GOTHIC
Southern Gothi is the slow ooked* bloody1nosed mistress that #ets e(en with a pi k a6 and

a .;;. )at h her bubble up from @ouisiana swamps with #rime under her imma ulate fin#ernails. )at h her ki k1ass. She>s the blood* sweat* and su#ary #rits at the ass end of a train wre k* all wrapped up neatly by an intestinal ribbon of ma abre. 5er mummified remnants muddy up the waters of lassi 'meri an @iterature. 'nd for that reason* Southern Gothi is the sti ky* homey* soul food slitherin# down your throat in &%%1de#ree humidity. That>s what she means to me* anyhow. Iltimately* she>s the 'meri an #enre that isn>t afraid to wade knee1deep throu#h murky water. She limbs out onto perfe tly sturdy tree limbs and starts sawin# at the knot. Southern Gothi lets us #et damn personal with the anti1hero and e6perien e the hero>s Eourney from a profoundly flawed pla e. 'nd its flaws that make thin#s appealin#. 2mperfe tion is perfe tion. -ow* take Southern Gothi farther. )hir up a paint mi6er and sniff. 3i6 it #ood and let her ferment with #enres like 5orror* Pulp* and Splatterpunk. Then you>(e #ot Southern1fried Gothi with a #ator>s bite[a rotten* festerin# hunk of meat* spi ed up with a pin h of !i6ie and peppered by the uniFue tradition of the 'meri an South. heers* J. R. Parks

*****

SPECI L TH NKS
E(in )ol(erton* Jonathan 5uffman* 3oniFue 3onte0* @uke Sharkey* 3ike 4alentino* and the Buffalo Ri(er for inspirin# me. To my folks* my sis* my bro* and friends for their undyin# support and lo(e. *****

BOUT THE UTHO%

Born at &&:&& on the $$nd of September in the hot* dry town of 3ission 4ieEo* "alifornia* J. R. Parks was weaned on monster fli ks* #host stories* wi0ards* and li#htsabers. 5e>s seen Jaws

o(er a hundred times* an>t #et enou#h of "li(e Barker>s mad s rat hin#* and dreamt* from the be#innin#* of the day he>d take pen to paper and show those monsters what for. www.bu kydennis. om