Selfishness vs.

Selflessness
"For all seek their own, not the things which are Yeshua ha Mashiyach's."
by Hatzair (a.k.a. Jerry Williams)

Most folks are accustomed to the idea that if you're not being obnoxiously selfish, then you're O.K. A
person who habitually puts his or her own interests first, without any regard for the inconvenience (or calamity)
they may bring upon others, is generally classified as selfish; but those who avoid such obviously self-centered
actions are rarely considered to be selfish. However, such a definition of selfishness is far from satisfactory,
from a scriptural point of view. The Word of Elohiym calls us, not to passive indifference but to active selfless
service. According to the message of the New Testament, it is not enough merely to avoid overtly living for
ourselves at the expense of others. Instead, it can be stated that those who are not laying down their lives in
devotion to Elohiym, and in service to others, are guilty of "seeking their own." This type of selfishness mostly
gets unnoticed, though, because we have been raised up in such a "Me Generation" society. So, rather than
spending time on the obvious examples of self-centeredness, let us call attention to the subtle ways in which
people are being selfish, living unto themselves.
Not uncommonly, we hear people who profess Christianity justify something they do, or desire to do,
with the statement, "I don't see anything wrong with that." Often this is due to failure to take the Scriptures
seriously: they enjoy their sin, and will not be deterred by a few biblical passages. Sometimes, however, it is
true that the particular action they are referring to, in and of itself, is not necessarily wrong. The problem is that
their lives, even in the best examples, consist almost exclusively of things that "aren't necessarily wrong," in and
of themselves. There is nothing blatantly contrary to Scripture about living in a house, working with your
hands, taking a trip to another state, learning about a particular subject, enjoying music, passing time with
certain types of hobbies, or keeping company with like-minded people. The goal, the very target of Evangelical
churchfolk, is to have a life made up of such things. Nevertheless, if your life consists of little more than this, it
isn't much of a Christian testimony. When the best that a believer can say about his life is merely that the vast
majority of his time is taken up in activities that "aren't necessarily wrong," he is exhibiting a prime example of
what the Scriptures call being "lukewarm" towards Yeshua. (See Revelations 3:15,16)
Nowhere in the New Testament are we taught that Christian life consists of doing whatever we want as
long as it is not violently contrary to Scripture. The primary focus of a true follower of Yeshua is not about
answering the question, "Is what I wish to do necessarily wrong?" Rather, it is about answering the question,
"Is what I wish to do something that Elohiym delights in?" The Holy Scriptures make clear the sorts of things
in which our heavenly father delights (e.g., purity, kindness, study of the Scriptures, prayer, sharing our faith,
service, etc.); the actual goal and target of a Christian is to have one's life consist largely of these types of
things.
In Matthew 11, some disciples of John the Baptist came with a message from John, essentially asking if
Yeshua was the Messiah. Instead of just saying, "Yes; that's me," which anyone could have done, Yeshua
pointed out that He was doing things that, to those who knew the Scriptures, would identify Him clearly to be
the Mashiyach (referring to Isaiah 35:3-6 and Isaiah 61:1). He then added, "And blessed is he, whosoever shall
not be offended in me." (Matthew 11:6)
It would be an understatement to say that many people were offended at Yeshua, but we tend to forget
this fact. After nearly 2,000 years, being trained by society to picture a Christ who is something like Mr.
Rogers, it is easy to miss that Yeshua was "despised and rejected," and eventually killed, for what He taught.
(see Isaiah 53) Multitudes came to be healed by Him, and to hear Him; but in the bitter end, before the
Resurrection, only a small number counted themselves as His disciples. Apparently, then, most people were
offended at Yeshua, for some reason or other.
Few would have been offended at the Messiah if He had come preaching only that we need to change
some of our beliefs, spend a few hours of the week differently from what we are accustomed to, and abstain
from obvious vices, such as intoxication, brawling, or cheating on one's spouse. Religions of the world,
whether Catholic, Protestant, Muslim, Hindu, Buddhist, or otherwise, are content to require little more than
these types of things. A quiet, normal life of religious complacency would have suited people just fine, as it has
since time immemorial. But Yeshua's words came smashing into people's worlds with something new and
radical--and this was offensive. He called upon people to go way beyond the complacent norms of society, and
live out selfless devotion. Yeshua spoke hard sayings about denying ourselves and taking up the cross to follow
Him, about dying to ourselves, about selling out and leaving all behind, about suffering wrong without fighting
back, and about obeying His commandments even if it means losing our own families. The Messiah claimed
authority as Master and Adon (Luke 6:46; John 13:13); He taught that we should, indeed must, be willing to
confess Him before men, to bear affliction and persecution for Him, and even to die for His sake. (Mark 13:9-
13)
In short, Yeshua's message and example call upon us to give up our lives in service to our Creator.
(Matthew 16:24,25) As the apostle Paul put it, we are to offer up our bodies to Elohiym as a living sacrifice.
(Romans 12:1) To become a Christian means to no longer live unto one's self, but unto Mashiyach. (2
Corinthians 5:15) He is telling us, not to merely make a few alternations in our schedule and beliefs, but to
totally and radically change virtually everything about our life, and become "new creatures." (2 Corinthians
5:17)
In this light, suddenly the "not necessarily wrong" lifestyle is exposed as, in fact, all wrong; it is a life
inherently and thoroughly selfish. The parable Yeshua spoke in Luke 12:16-21 illustrates this point clearly.
Here we have a man who worked long and hard, and received abundantly for his labor. Yeshua did not say that
the man was dishonest. He made no mention of him keeping wages back from any workers. From society's
view, it would be very difficult to point out anything he had done that was "necessarily wrong." Yet, Elohiym
was greatly displeased with him, and the reason is that all his work was for himself. The modern version of this
parable is known as the "American Ideal," a life centered around careers and possessions. It is the very epitome
of living unto one's self: planning and working and saving and investing, with the goal of obtaining things for
self. Though considered so normal, even admirable, through the lens of Yeshua's message it is seen as
selfishness, pure and simple. The New Testament message is about giving, the American Ideal is about getting.
Yeshua taught self-denial, and self-sacrifice for the good of others; the American Ideal stresses self-
preservation. The New Testament calls us to live by faith in an invisible Provider; the American Ideal exhorts
rather to depend on visible securities such as material assets and armed defenses. The Christian life is about
seeking first the kingdom of Elohiym, being willing to suffer affliction, and being content even when
experiencing necessities (see 2 Corinthians 6:4, 2 Corinthians 12:10); the American Ideal, as promoted by its
Evangelical church world, advocates spending large amounts of time pursuing comforts and pleasures for self.
And while the early Christians strove to perfect holiness in the fear of Elohiym (2 Corinthians 7:1), modern
believers often justify their lives by saying that the things they do, even in their most optimistic opinions, are
merely "not necessarily wrong."
To those content to live a typical, complacent life of self-preservation, Yeshua's message has always
been greatly offensive. It threatens their entire world--it's too scary, too precarious, too radical, and requires
way too much of them. This is precisely what happened to the young rich ruler. (see Mark 10:17-21; Luke
18:18-23) Rather than letting his life fall on the Rock of Yeshua and be broken (Matthew 21:44), his self
preservation prevailed upon his heart to become offended. He concluded that the cost of discipleship was too
high. Many others have come to this same conclusion; and this trend continues even today. Although many are
willing to make some changes in their life for the sake of their faith, most are not in any way planning to lay
down their lives, goals, plans, and careers in order to commit themselves to selfless, Christ-like service and
devotion to Elohiym. Instead, they are busy charting out their course of society's normal, typical, predictable,
secure, lukewarm, selfish lifestyle. To them, a selfless Gospel like the one Yeshua preached is simply
offensive.
Consider two outstanding examples in the New Testament, the apostles Peter and Paul. (Other non-
apostolic examples could be cited, such as Timothy or Titus, but these two apostles will serve the purpose.)
Neither was content with a quiet, complacent life, one considered normal by society's standards. Instead, they
gave their lives to carry the Gospel to the world--they were both determined to live for others. Indeed, this was
what first century Christianity was all about: "by love serve one another" (Galatians 5:13); "I will very gladly
spend and be spent for you" (2 Corinthians 12:15); "neither count I my life dear unto myself, that I might finish
my course with joy, and the ministry, which I have received of the Adon Yeshua, to testify the Gospel of the
grace of Elohiym." (Acts 20:24) And it's a good thing, of course, that they were willing to live for others rather
than live a quiet life for themselves, or else we may never have heard about the Gospel today.
It is by understanding this message of selflessness that we can grasp the meaning of the New Testament
exhortations to prefer one another (Romans 12:10), to esteem others better than ourselves (Phil 2:3), and to take
the lower seat (Luke 14:10,11). Yeshua Himself did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give His life as
a ransom for many. (Matthew 20:28) Paul echoes this by saying that he had made himself servant unto all. (1
Corinthians 9:19) His reason for this, he stated, was to win others to Yeshua. Paul's focus--and the focus of
first century Christians in general--was not on merely avoiding actions that are "necessarily wrong," but on
dedicating one's life for the salvation of others, and to be able to help as many souls as possible.
When believers fail to see themselves as servants, both to Elohiym, and to all people, they tend to hold
themselves more highly in importance; and this produces little besides selfish attitudes and actions. Something
often associated with placing importance on one's self is putting great emphasis on being treated fairly. This
manifests itself as being quick to anger, a consistent demand for respect, and continual efforts to defend our
own reputation and to seek retribution when wronged. If such statements surprise you, they shouldn't. The
concern of Elohiym's people in the New Testament is not about "what is fair for me," but rather about what is
charitable and holy, and what makes for a truly Christian testimony. In the last 11 verses of Matthew 5, Yeshua
makes this point clear. Now, it is certainly true that Christians are not supposed to do wrong to others; but how
should a Christian respond when he is wronged? Are we to demand "fair" retribution?
In 1 Corinthians 6, Paul answers this question. Apparently, some in the church had wronged their
brethren; and those defrauded had reacted by taking them to court. This was "utterly a fault," something
horribly wrong that these brothers didn't just bear it and forgive. "Why do ye not rather take wrong?" Paul
asks; "Why do ye not rather suffer yourselves to be defrauded?" Yeshua gave us an example of taking wrong
patiently and charitably (Luke 23:34, 1 Peter 2:19-23); and Stephen followed faithfully in his Master's steps.
(Acts 7:59, 60) Many would do well to remember more often the Scripture that tells us to not take heed unto all
words that are spoken. (Ecclesiastes 7:21,22) It is easier to be of this long suffering attitude when we are not
holding ourselves in great importance. There is, to be sure, a time and place to "warn the unruly" (1
Thessalonians 5:14) and instruct with meekness those who are erring. (James 5:19,20) However, our reason for
acting must spring from charity, out of a desire to restore someone in need (Galatians 6:1); it should not be out
of merely wanting to defend ourselves.
When self is on the throne, trifling matters best left ignored become grounds for offense, and even anger
and bitterness. "My opinion" becomes most important, "my way" is assumed to be the best way, "my
questions" are regarded as the ones needed to be answered first, and "my problems" are the most pressing.
Meanwhile, it becomes difficult to see anything as "my fault." When several people harbor such attitudes,
arguing and resentment are virtually inevitable. Further, in this selfish frame of mind, it is easier to be offended
at instruction and reproof than to receive them. It is with meekness that one receives the saving Word (James
1:21); and meekness isn't a characteristic of self-centeredness.
Selfishness is as well present in all desire for vain glory, which can quickly lead to envy and strife. (see
Galatians 5:26) It brings one to thinking much about self, talking about self, and being concerned about the
needs of self, rather than looking "on the things of others." (Phil 2:4) Each of us, of course, has needs; and our
Father wants us to ask Him for good things. (Matthew 7:11) However, when prayer time becomes little more
than presenting a wish list of items for self, it can hardly be denied that selfishness is involved.
The holy, upright love of Elohiym in a Christian's heart is something that leads away from seeking one's
own. (1 Corinthians 13:6) Charity is never selfish; it is too concerned about others to place much importance on
self. Selfishness is not upright--in fact, it is at the base of virtually every manner of sin. Paul was aware of this
connection; in 2 Timothy 3, he refers to those who are "lovers of their own selves," and lists numerous awful
things that are associated with that. Few have pointed out the connection between womanizing and selfishness;
but once considered, the association is inescapable: pursuing one's own desires without any thought whatsoever
for its effects on others. Similar statements can be made about theft and other forms of dishonesty, as well as
covetousness, murder, and many other sins.
Everyone who chooses the world over service to Elohiym is being selfish, particularly those who leave
Elohiym, and His people, to return to the world (as Demas did in 2 Timothy 4:10). The result is universally the
same: serving sin, being a hinderance and a stumblingblock to those who are trying to follow Yeshua, and
troubling others (in various ways) whom they should be seeking to help. And it is always for nothing else but
seeking temporal pleasures for self.
So, we can see that merely abstaining from certain things that are obviously contrary to the Scriptures is
not enough. Rather, a complete definition of selfishness manifests that if we are not actively being selfless--
giving our life in service to Yeshua, and for the good of others--then we are being selfish. If the best
justification that can be offered for nearly all of the activities in one's life is, "I don't see anything wrong with
it," such a life can be classified as thinly veiled selfishness. It is an attitude that seeks first its own will, not the
attitude of asking what will please Elohiym the most.
Are you willing to lay down your whole life for the sake of others?