Its about that time again.

Weve come across the middle of the season and its time for
another midseason report. It might not be exactly the middle of the season but its been
long enough to let things settle into place. For one thing, Im in first place as per usual.
This is no surprise. For another thing, Kuney is the bottom of the barrel. This is also no
surprise. What IS a surprise is that Chris is 4-1. Congrats Chris! You should feel good
about yourself. Just like you should have felt good about yourself a couple years ago
when your team started 5-0. You then proceeded to lose 5 or so straight and not even
make the playoffs.

Heres a personalized grading of everyones team, starting with the best and going from
there:

#1. Jeffalo Bills Me
The Jeffalo Bills are primed and ready to make it official Bills status and make four
consecutive Super Bowls and lose them all. With a stellar lineup and depth, the Jeffalos
crafted its team by taking chances on injury prone players such as Gronkowski, Julio
Jones, and Jay Cutler. Clearly, the Jeffalo Bills dont believe in the whole injury prone
BS and understand that injuries in the NFL are mostly due to chance.

#2. Master Beaters Jeff Senior
Second place also belongs to another Jeff Henderson. However, one has to wonder
what third grader gave him the idea for his team name. One would then need to wonder
why he is consulting third graders. Anyway, Master Beaters draft strategy was quite
brilliant. Heres how he planned it all out:
Step 1) Forget what email you used for the league and realize it a half hour before the
draft
Step 2) Figure out yahoo login info about 7 minutes before the draft
Step 3) Figure out that you have to click the big blue DRAFT PLAYER button just a
second or two before your first pick is autopicked.

#3. Sacko Recipient #2 Chris
Once again Chris you should feel good about yourself now because its only a matter of
time before you suck. Thanks for the $50 though, we all appreciate it.

#4. Franks Freaks Frank
The league champ started off with a rough go of it but has since turned it around.
Couple of great draft picks in Marshawn Lynch and Antonio Brown anchor its squad. Ill
be looking to avenge my SB loss to you in the playoffs.

#5. Winer Diner 49er Bhupen
Bhupen I just looked at your roster and cant believe how awful it is. Forte and Julius
Thomas must be doing some work for you to be 3-2. Bhupen has never made the
playoffs in this league. It wont be long before the lights go out early on your season
just like they did in Vegas on a particular Saturday night

#6. Trestmans Fanny Pack John
With the most points in the league, John is set for another playoff run. Thats about all I
have

#7. Forte Shades of Jay Thomas
Thomas took an early pick on Andrew Luck that has shown to be wise as he has a
comfortable lead in QB points.

#8. Insane Clowney Posse Miller
Millers team is just boring. Lets move on.

#9. Touchdown Teddy Luke
Jared Cook is your starting tight endThat sucksBut to be honest, Kyle Rudolph was
a bust anyway. Luke hasnt had a strong start in his short two year stint in the league
but thats what happens when youre a homer filled team from Minnesota.

#10. Suck a Ditka Berry
Berry you win for leagues best nick name. Thats about all you go going for you. What
happened to being the most mediocre of mediocre? I suppose its karma for taking the
entire offseason to ship the trophy to the new winner. Perhaps your team will take a
similar approach and finally kick in come consolation bracket time. Cuz lets face it,
thats all you have hope for at this point.

#11. Big D Adam
Adam once again made a splash in the draft at taking Aaron Rodgers with the third
overall pick. As it stands now, a better pick would have been Jay Cutler.

#12. Fuck Jeffafa Kuney
Fuck Jeffafa, formerly known as NOT LAST sits comfortably in last place. Just to think
a year ago he was awarded with the Yahoo best draft of the league preseason award.
Clearly that didnt work out so he tried a different strategy this year. Such as drafting his
starting tight end that wasnt even on an NFL team. It was a bold move.

Lets play a game. Its called, guess what tight ends are playing better than the one
Kuney drafted:

Better Tight Ends Employer Season Points
Ryan Hewitt Cincinnati .6
Michael Hoomanawanui New England .6
Harold Hoskins Miami .7
Michael Jensen Jacksonville .8
Vance McDonald San Francisco .9

Kuneys Tight End Employer Season Points
Jermichael Finley Super Suds 0

You get the point. Kuneys an idiot.