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The Dowry

Co-Authors: Madam Zahira batool, Mr. Shahid Javed

The psychological, social and religious perspective of Dowry.

Marriage in Islam is not a private and personal affair of an individual, but this is a matter of
concern for the society, he belongs. This custom has become so important that without dowry it
is difficult to think of marriage. In many cases parents have to sell their property or borrow the
money. Sometime even they have to adopt the unfair means to fulfil the demand of dowry.

The dowry has become a curse particularly for low and middle class people; dowry consists of
ornaments, garments and male female outfits, furniture, utensils, embroidery works, animal and
other material possessions as well as cash. It is specially given form the side of female family. It
is the property, which is given to her at her marriage by her family. With the passage of time
dowry has become a more necessary, which is observed at the time of marriage. The idea behind
the custom has changed now. It has become a sign of business status and prestige.

It was originated in Rome as a wedding gift to a daughter from her family (money, cloth or
jewellery). If the marriage failed the dowry was given back to wife and in case of death the
dowry was given to her inheritors. It is also a kind of insurance in case of mistreatment by her
family.

Islam says nothing about dowry custom. “Quran and Hadith” are daughters about it. In Hadith
dowries of Holy Prophet’s daughters are mentioned. Our Holy Prophet (PBUH) gave dowry to
his loveable daughter Hazrat Fatima (RA) according to his capacity. But now-a-days dowry has
become the curse for the people specially lower and middle class people. Because poor people
cannot fulfilled the demands of their daughters in-laws.

In Pakistan per capita income is less. Dowry system is not only an economic problem but also a
psychological strain. Dowry has become a serious problem for remaining unmarried for the poor
families’ girls, because poor girls do not bring expensive articles. Dowry has become a business
in our society. Groom’s families demand a lot of articles, the in-laws of those girls who bring
fewer dowries. They abuse them and torch them from different ways and sometimes, the in-laws
and husbands throw the girls outside the houses.

Dowry, narrowly defined, a dowry is the goods given by a bride’s family to the family of her
groom. More broadly a dowry is all the goods jewellery, money, household items, animals or
other valuables, a bride brings with her at her marriage.

In India, dowries have been declared as illegal, in the past, because of a tendency of some
families to view the birth of a daughter as an unwelcome financial burden and to treat girls
accordingly. Yet a dowry is still a part of many Indians marriages especially among the poor, it
may pay for the wedding itself rather than enrich the groom's family or purchase basic household
necessities for the married couple.

Once upon a time, a woman, inviting in Africa, was invited to attend a wedding. Upon learning
that the bride's and groom's families had negotiated the value of the match and that the groom's
family had agreed to pay the bride's a total of two bulls and four milking cows, one with a calf, at
the time of the wedding.

"Anthropologists use the terms bride-wealth, bride-service and dowry to distinguish among the
goods and services".

Bride-wealth (bride-price) is property transferred from a groom's family to the bride's on the
occasion of a marriage. Animals, money, houses, jewelry of clothing, virtually anything
considered of valuable in a society can constitute bride-wealth. The number and quality of ideas
involved may depend on the wealth of the groom's family, their prestige relative to that of their
new affine and the social importance of the particular marriage.

Bride-service occurs when a son-in-law works for his father-in-law to compensate him for the
loss of his daughter's services. Sometimes, the son-in-law's labor is a limited period of time
perhaps until his wife gives birth to their first child. Sometimes, it last until the old man dies.

In Islam instead of dowry, there is a concept of "Dower" or "Mehr". Mehr is a kind of gift which
is given by the bride-groom to the bride at the time of marriage or afterwards, difference between
dowry and Mehar is that the former has no legal or religious basis, while the latter has religious
and legal standing.

According to Islam, women have right in parental property. A daughter inherits half of what the
brother inherits, in the event of death of either parent.

Islam does not like to display things especially unnecessary goods among people. But societies,
especially under-developing societies like Pakistan, it is common that people like to display
dowry at the time of marriage. In this way people copy to each other and try to give dowry to
their daughter contrary their prestige so that is why dowry has become a cause in our society.

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