gamomcemloba `nakaduli 1988w.

mTargmneli neli amaSukeli

ana frankis dRiuri

12 ivnisi, 1942 1 agvisto, 1944
germanulidan Targmna, winasityvaoba da SeniSvnebi daurTo neli
amaSukelma
winasityvaoba
am wignze mSralad da Cveulebrivi miudgomlobiT laparaki SeuZlebelia,
radgan metad uCveuloa misi damweris bedi. oTxkedelSua gamoketili 13 wlis
gogona ori wlis manZilze gulwrfelad aqsovda dRiurSi sakuTar gancdebs,
fiqrebs, imedebs, wuxils, SiSs, xan emociis gamomwvev, xanac Rimilis momgvrel
STabeWdilebebs. Cveulebrivi bavSvuri uSualobiT dawyebuli dRiuri, erTsa da
imave adamianebTan yoveldRiuri urTierTobiT da yofiTi wvrilmanebiT
SezRudul, mZime, saxifaTo garemoSi, gogonas uaxloesi megobari da mesaidumle
gaxda. ararsebul megobars anam kiwi daarqva da misgan eloda nugeSsa da
Semweobas. Tu sikvdils ver gaeqceoda, anas undoda, misi dRiuri masTan erTad
daRupuliyo, magram moxda ise, rom ana daiRupa, dRiuri ki gadarCa.
gadarCa mxolod dRiuri, kacobriobis istoriaSi erT-erTi usaSinlesi
drois mamxilebeli dokumenti. germanelma faSistebma totaluri saxelmwifos
Seqmnisa da msoflioSi gabatonebis ideas msxverplad moutanes yvelaferi
adamianuri. faSistebi gegmianad, meTodurad spobdnen ara marto xalxs, aramed
kacobriobis zneobriv monapovarsac. es iyo dro, roca evropaSi milionobiT
udanaSaulo adamianis sisxli iRvreboda da sakoncentracio banakebSi
krematoriumebi bolavda. swored am TavaSvebuli rbevis, Zaladobisa da
masobrivi mkvlelobis msxverpli gaxda patara ana.
anas mama, oto franki, daibada germaniaSi, mainis frankfurtSi;
universitetis damTavrebis Semdeg komerciul saqmianobas mihyo xeli.
monawileobda pirvel msoflio omSi. 1933 wels, rogorc ki germaniaSi
faSisturi reJimi damyarda, oto frankma ojaxi holandiaSi gadaiyvana da
faSistebis risxvas ganerida. amsterdamSi, prinsengraxtze, saxli daiqirava da
firma gaxsna. axlad dawyebuli cxovreba TiTqos mSvidad, normalurad
mimdinareobda, magram germanelebma holandia daipyres da kvlav daiwyo
ebraelTa sastiki devna. anas mamam germanelebis xelSi Cavardnas damalva arCia;
1942 wlis zafxulSi, holandieli TanamSromlebis daxmarebiT, firmis Senobis
ukana nawili saTanadod moawyo da, roca mis ufros qaliSvils, margos,
gestapodan uwyeba mouvida, col-Svili winaswar momzadebul `TavSesafarSi~
gadaxizna. amave TavSesafarSi gadmovida kidev erTi ojaxi, van daani coliTa
da vaJiSviliT. bolos maT `ojaxs~ merve wevri, kbilis eqimi duseli Seemata.
amgvarad rva adamiani iatakqveS aRmoCnda da TavSesafris mkacr reJims
daemorCila.
patara ana xalisianad, ndobiT, udardelad Sescqeroda cxovrebas;
celqobda, keklucobda, alerssa da yuradRebas moiTxovda. uecrad bedma gare
samyaros moswyvita, oTx kedelSi gamoketa, dRis sinaTle da haeri moanatra.
amieridan is mxolod qurdulad, fardis WuWrutanidan uyurebda cxovrebis
ulazaTo dinebas, xolo TavSesafarSi Zalauneburad erTad Seyrili adamianebis
ubadrukobas, angariSianobas da kinklaobas xedavda. am sulis SemxuTav
garemoSi TiTqos unda damWknariyo, daClungebuliyo jer kidev moumwifebeli
goneba da grZnoba, magram moxda piriqiT; swored aq gaiSala, naadrevad
momwifda da gamomJRavnda anas niWi.

dauokebelma cnobismoyvareobam, STabeWdilebaTa Rrma gancdam, rTulma,

winaaRmdegobebiT savse bunebam, sakuTari Tavisadmi da gare samyarosadmi
kritikulma damokidebulebam gauRrmava anas aRqmis unari, xedvas SeaCvia da
ufaqizesi grZnobis gadmocema aswavla.
ana Zalze saxifaTo da daZabul momentebSic ki amCnevs cxovrebis
sasacilo movlenebs. misi ironia erTsa da imave dros javSanicaa da adamianuri
sisustisa da yofiTi wvrilmanebisadmi Semwynarebloba da siyvarulic.
damoukidebeli, kritikuli xedvis unari dRiTi dRe Rrmavdeba da
miukerZoeblobisa da simarTlisaken swrafvas verc axlo naTesauri
damokidebuleba axSobs da verc pirveli siyvaruli. ane gacilebiT mets amCnevs
da ukeTesadac, vidre TavSesafris danarCeni mkvidrni, ufro realurad uyurebs
cxovrebas, met uSualobas iCens adamianebTan urTierTobaSi da cdilobs
gaerkves sakuTar grZnobebSi, amaRldes, daZlios SiSi, gaTavisufldes eWvebisa
da meryeobisagan, ipovos mtkice sayrdeni, Rirseulad Seegebos damcirebasa da
sikvdils. magram rac ufro izrdeba gonebrivad, miT ufro rTuldeba cxovreba.
ana grZnobs sakuTar gaorebas, Sinagan winaaRmdegobas gare samyarosTan da
bolos im daskvnamde midis, rom maTi morigeba an sasurveli mimarTulebiT
warmarTva mis Zal-Rones aRemateba. misTvis bevri ram aris amqveynad bneliT
moculi da gaugebari, magram erTi ram yovelTvis cxadia: adamiani
Sromismoyvare, keTili da faqizi unda iyos.
axla zedmeti da Znelicaa imaze laparaki, Tu ra gziT ganviTardeboda
anas niWi da ras SesZenda literaturas, magram ase naTlad gamokveTili
mxatvruli alRo, msjelobis unari, mignebebi da saTqmelis mokled, ZiriTad
StrixebSi gadmocemis niWi mis asakSi bevr did mweralsac ar hqonia. SeiZleba
amas dromac Seuwyo xeli. ebraelTa sastikma devnam, darbevam, wamebam, mTeli
eris mospobis saSiSroebam, omiT gamowveulma siduxWirem, adamianTa dakninebam
da binZuri, veluri instinqtebis zeimma igi Zalauneburad miiyvana im
aucileblobamde, rom TviTon garkveuliyo movlenaTa viTarebaSi, gaeazrebina
yvelaferi, rac mis irgvliv da qveyanaze xdeboda. ori wlis ganmavlobaSi anaam
bevri ram Seigno, gadaafasa, uaryo da miiRo, magram bavSvuri sibrZniT
ganWvretili cxovrebisa da adamianobisaTvis arasodes ar uRalatnia. igi
gulxeldakrefili rodi eloda sikvdils; mecadineobda, Sromobda, werda,
gulaxdilad esaubreboda ucnob megobars da am adamianuri iaraRiT ebrZoda
araadamianur Zaladobas, romelic miuxedavad sikvdilisa, mainc ukuagdo da
daamarcxa.
ori weliwadi elodnen ltolvilebi sikvdils an Tavisuflebas da
bolos Tavisuflebas isev sikvdilma daaswro.
1944 wlis 4 agvistos gestapom TavSesafari aRmoaCina da yvelani
daapatimra. faSistebis risxva Tavs daatyda agreTve ebraelebis mfarvel
holandielebsac. oto frankis TanamSromlebis da megobrebis eli vosenis, mip
da henk van santenebis Tavdauzogavi zrunva amao aRmoCnda, maT ver ixsnes
ganwirulni. kraleri da koophoisi ki, rogorc firmis mmarTvelebi,
ltolvilebTan erTad daapatimres. mZime avadmyofi koophoisi cixidan male
gaaTavisufles, xolo kraleri amersfortis banakSi moxvda, saidanac germaniaSi
upirebdnen wayvanas, magram gaqceva moaxerxa da omis damTavrebis Semdeg colSvils daubrunda.
anas Segnebuli hqonda, Tu ra mZime tvirTi awva maT holandiel megobrebs
da maTi bediT Sewuxebuli werda: `gana damalvas da amdeni saSinelebis
gadatanas sikvdili ar jobda. maSin arc Cvens mfarvelebs CavagdebdiT
safrTxeSi~.
dapatimrebuli ebraelebi cixidan vesterborkis gamanawilebel banakSi
moxvdnen. 3 seqtembers anas ded-mama da van daanebis ojaxi osvencimSi gagzavnes,
30 oqtombers ki margo da ana bergen-belzenis sakoncentracio banakSi
gadaiyvanes. am banakSi ana Sexvda Tavis skolis megobars lis goosens, romlis
Sesaxebac 1943 wlis 27 noembers werda: `guSin saRamos... Tvalwin naTlad
warmomidga lisi. idga Cems win dakonkili, gamxdari, ybebCacvenili; misi didi

sevdiani Tvalebi sayveduriT micqerdnen, TiTqos meubnebodnen: ana, ratom

mimatove, damexmare, mixseni am jojoxeTidan! ...ratom unda gadavrCe me, is ki
sadRac Cakvdes?~. magram anas varaudi ar gamarTlda. lisi gadarCa da bergenbelzenSi anasTan Sexvedras ase igonebs: `anas ZonZebi ecva. sibneleSic ki Canda,
rogor gamxdariyo. loyebi Cascvenoda, Tvalebi kidev ufro gafarToeboda...
oriveni vtirodiT, videqiT da vtirodiT erTmaneTs ekliani mavTulxlarTebi
gvaSorebda~.
osvencimSi daiRupnen anas deda, col-qmari van daanebi, peteri da duseli.
1945 wlis TebervalSi bergen-belzenSi SimSilisagan gardaicvala margo,
gazafxulis damdegs anamac dalia suli.
ltolvilTagan gadarCa mxolod anas mama. igi ixsna sabWoTa armiam,
romelmac osvencimi daikava da visac suli edga, mzrunveloba ar moaklo.
ganTavisuflebis Semdeg oto franki holandiaSi dabrunda, magram
maxlobelTagan cocxali veRaravin ipova. damwuxrebuls elim da mipma anas
dRiuri gadasces, romelic saxlis gaCxrekis Semdeg uwesrigod dayril Zvel
wignebsa da Jurnal-gazeTebs Soris aRmoaCines da Seinaxes.
ra icoda saidumlo policiam, rom uyuradRebod migdebuli bavSvis
rveuli mTel msoflios aaRelvebda. ana frankis dRiuri aTjer gamoica
holandiaSi, ocze met enaze iTargmna da msoflioSi milioniani tiraJiT
gavrcelda. am dRiuris mixedviT Seqmnes piesebi da kinofilmebi. wignze mravali
gamokvleva daiwera.
ra kuTxiTac unda miudgeT anas dRiurs, umTavresi mainc misi gonebrivi
ganviTarebis procesi da cxovrebisadmi damokidebulebaa. anam icoda, rom
cxovrebam igi ori ukiduresobis zRvramde miiyvana an sikvdili, an
gamarjveba; magram icoda isic, rom zogjer wamebiT sikvdili igive gamarjvebaa,
momavlis sakeTildReod gamarjveba. amitom SerCa mas bolomde Sinagani
Tavisufleba da sakuTari Rirsebis Segneba. ai, ras ambobs de viki, romelic
anasTan erTad vesterborkis banakSi iyo: `ana franksa da peter van daans
yoveldRe vxedavdi. mudam erTad iyvnen... anas Tvalebi ubrwyinavda... da ise
Tavisuflad eWira Tavi, iseTi pirdapiri gamoxedva hqonda, rom Cems Tavs
veubnebodi: igi xom aqac bednieria!~
neli amaSukeli
am wignis Sesaxeb
(germanuli gamocemidan)
am Semzarav cxovrebiseul dokumentSi erT mTlianobadaa qceuli devnili
ojaxis bedi da uCveulod niWieri da mgrZnobiare bavSvis sulieri cxovreba.
arsebobis simZimem da sikvdilis mudmivma muqaram gaamZafra gogonas sulisa da
gonebis gancdebi da grZnobebis gamoxatvis iseTi unari SesZina, romelmac misi
dRiuri naadrevad mowifulTa sakuTrebad aqcia. SeuZlebelia, daiviwyo bavSvi,
romelic misi ojaxis TavSesafris sazarel sxvenze aparula, raTa
varskvlavebiT moWedil zecas ucqiros.
sapyrobileSi, sadac adamianebma Seagdes, ana franki wers: `rodesac
axloblebze fiqrob, tirili gindeba, SeiZleba mTeli dRe itiro. amitom isRa
grCeba, rom RmerTs Seevedro, saswauli moaxdinos da zog maTgans sicocxle
SeunarCunos! da me suliTa da guliT vloculob~.
dRiuri
12 ivnisi, 1942
imedi maqvs, SemiZlia gando Sen yvelaferi, gando ise, rogorc aqamde
aravis mivndobivar, imedi maqvs, Sen Cemi didi nugeSi iqnebi.

kvira, 14 ivnisi, 1942

paraskevs dilis eqvs saaTze gameRviZa. es gasagebicaa, Cemi dabadebis dRe
iyo. magram ase adre adgomis ufleba ar mqonda da sanam Svids TxuTmeti
daakldeboda, cnobismoyvareoba unda dameokebina. met xans veRar gavZeli.
gaviqeci sasadilo oTaxSi, sadac Cveni patara kata, morheni, Zalze alersianad
Semomegeba. rva rom daiwyo, mSoblebs mivakiTxe da maTTan erTad sastumro
oTaxSi gavedi: mindoda, saCuqrebi menaxa da amomelagebina. yvelaze adre Sen
daginaxe, Cemo dRiuro, da es marTlac saucxoo saCuqari iyo. damxvda agreTve
vardebis Taiguli, kaqtusi, tyis yayaCos ramdenime Sto. es iyo yvavilebis
pirveli salami, Semdeg ki ufro meti momarTves.
mamam da dedam ra ar maCuqes, megobrebmac Zalze gamanebivres. sxvaTa
Soris miviRe `Camera Obscura~1, ( bneli kamera (laT.) holandiaSi Zalian
gavrcelebuli wigni. (SeniSvna yvelgan mTargmnelisaa) TavSesaqcevi da
Tavsamtvrevi saTamaSoebi, uamravi sasusnavi, gulis qinZisTavi, iozef kohenis
`holandiuri sagebi da legendebi~, kidev erTi mSvenieri wigni: `dezis
saardadegebo mogzauroba mTebSi~ da fuli. am fuliT mere berZnuli da
romauli sagmiro Tqmulebebi viyide. SesaniSnavia!
Semdeg lisim gamomiara da skolaSi wavediT. jer maswavleblebsa da
Tanaklaselebs kanfetebiT gavumaspinZldi1, ( aseTi wesia holandiaSi dabadebis
dRes) mere swavlas SevudeqiT.
jer es iyos. ra mixaria, Sen rom gamiCndi!
orSabaTi, 15 ivnisi, 1942
SabaTs, nasadilevs, dabadebis dRis aRsaniSnavad wveuleba mqonda.
stumrebs vaCveneT filmi `Suquris daraji~ (rin-tin-tinis monawileobiT);
suraTi Cems megobar gogonebs Zalze moewonaT. bevri vicelqeT, uzomod
kmayofilni viyaviT. wveulTa Soris bevri gogo da biWi iyo. dedaCems yovelTvis
ainteresebs, am biWebidan romelze visurvebdi gaTxovebas momavalSi.
vfiqrob, Zalze gaukvirdeboda, rom gaego es ymawvili peter veselia,
radganac, roca masze sityvas Camomigdebda, mudam gulubryvilo
gamometyvelebas vRebulobdi. lis goosenssa da sane houtmans didi xania
vicnob da aqamde Cemi saukeTeso megobrebi iyvnen. magram am bolo dros
ebraelTa liceumSi iopi van der vaali gavicani. Cven xSirad varT erTad da
axla is aris Cemi saukeTeso megobari. lisi axla sxva gogonasTan megobrobs,
sane ki sxva skolaSi dadis da iqa hyavs Tavisi megobrebi.
SabaTi, 20 ivnisi, 1942
ramdenime dRea, araferi damiweria; jer mindoda, seriozulad
gavrkveuliyavi dRiuris arssa da mizanSi. ucnauri grZnoba maqvs, amieridan
dRiuri unda vwero. da ucnauria ara mxolod imitom, rom dRemde araferi
`damiweria~. me mgonia, momavalSi arc me da arc sxvas ar dagvainteresebs
cameti wlis moswavle gogonas gulwrfeli aRsareba. Tumca amas ra
mniSvneloba aqvs. me minda vwero da, rac mTavaria, Cemi gulis nadebi gamovTqva.
`qaRaldi adamianze amtania~. ase vfiqrobdi xSirad im dReebSi, roca
msubuqi melanqolia Semipyrobda, roca xelebze Tavdayrdnobili vijeqi da ar
vicodi, ra momexerxebina sakuTari TavisTvis. xan Sin darCena mindoda, xan
sadme wasvla, magram kvlav imave adgilas vijeqi da fiqrs ganvagrZobdi. diax,
qaRaldi amtania. me ar ganmizraxavs, odesme vinmes vaCveno es sqelydiani
rveuli maRalfardovani saxelwodebiT `dRiuri~, da Tu vaCveneb, mxolod
megobar vaJs an qals, radganac sxvebs igi arc daainteresebs. da ai, me ukve
vTqvi, ram maiZula dRiuri vwero: me ara myavs megobari qali!
axsna-ganmartebis gareSe veravin gaigebs, ratom grZnobs martoobas 13
wlis gogona. ucnauri ambavia, myavs kargi, sayvareli mSoblebi, 16 wlis da, da
Tu yvelas CamovTvliT, ocdaaTamde nacnobi, anu egreT wodebuli megobari,

Tayvanismcemlebis mTeli amala, romlebic TvalebSi miyureben da gakveTilze

manamde aTamaSeben sarkes, sanam Cems Rimils ar daiWeren. myavs naTesavebi,
SesaniSnavi biZebi da bicolebi. gvaqvs mSvenieri saxli. araferi maklia, garda
megobari qalisa. nacnobebTan mxolod sisuleleebiT virTob Tavs da yovelgvar
wvrilmanebze vlaqlaqeb. guli veravisTvis gadamiSlia. iseTi grZnoba maqvs,
TiTqos erTianad SemboWes. SeiZleba es Cemi naklia, SeiZleba meti ndobiT unda
vekidebode adamianebs, magram, samwuxarod, es asea da me arafris Secvla ar
SemiZlia. ai, ratom mWirdeba dRiuri. me minda didixnis nanatr megobars Cems
fantaziaSi xorci Seesxas da amitom dRiurSi marto mSral faqtebs ar Sevitan,
rogorc amas bevri akeTebs; me minda, es dRiuri Cemi megobari gaxdes da am
megobars erqmeva: kiwi!
yvelas gauWirdeboda gageba, pirdapir rom gameba saubari kiwisTan,
amitom movyvebi Cem biografias, Tumca sruliadac ar mexaliseba.
roca Cemi mSoblebi daqorwindnen, mama 36 wlisa iyo, deda 25-isa. Cemi
da margo 1926 wels daibada mainis frankfurtSi, me ki 1929 wels movevline
qveyanas. Cven ebraelebi varT da amitom 1933 wels, rogorc emigrantebi,
holandiaSi wamovediT, sadac mama saaqcio sazogadoeba `travi~-is direqtori
gaxda. es firma muSaobs `kolen da kompaniasTan~ mWidro kavSirSi da amave
firmis SenobaSia moTavsebuli.
sxvebiviT Cvenc ar gamogvelia sadardebeli cxovrebaSi, radganac
germaniaSi darCenili naTesavebi ver ascdnen hitleruli kanonebis klanWebs.
1938 wels, ebraelTa darbevis Semdeg, dedaCemis orive Zma amerikaSi gaiqca.
bebiaCemi CvenTan Camovida. maSin is 73 wlisa iyo. 1940 wlidan JamTa siavem
iZala. jer omi dagvatyda Tavs, mere kapitulacia, germanelebis SemoWra. axla
ki daiwyo Cveni sacodaoba. diqtatoris brZanebas brZaneba mosdevda.
gansakuTrebiT ebraelTa mdgomareoba gauaresda. ebraelebs unda etarebinaT
yviTeli varskvlavi, CaebarebinaT velosipedebi, ekrZalebodaT tramvaiT
mgzavroba, avtomobilebze xom laparakic zedmetia. raimes yidva mxolod
samidan xuT saaTamde SeeZloT isic mxolod ebraelTa savaWroebSi. saRamos
rva saaTis Semdeg ara marto quCaSi gamosvlis, aramed baRSi da aivanze
gaCerebis uflebac aRar hqondaT. ebraelebs aukrZales Teatrsa da kinoSi
siaruli, verc sxva gasarTob adgilebSi Sedgamdnen fexs. maT ekrZalebodaT
curva, CogburTisa da hokeis TamaSi, saerTod, sportis yvela saxeoba.
ebraelebs aRar hqondaT ufleba qristianebs swveodnen. ebrael bavSvebs ebraul
skolebSi unda eswavlaT. ase mozRvavda gankargulebebi. amieridan mTeli Cveni
cxovreba amgvari Zaldatanebis qveS moeqca. iopi mudam ambobs: veRaraferi
gamibedia, sul imis SiSi maqvs, akrZaluli ar iyoso. ama wlis ianvarSi bebiko
gardaicvala. aravin icis, rarig miyvarda da rogor damaklda. 1934 wels
montesoris skolis sabavSvo baRSi mimabares, Semdeg ki amave skolaSi damtoves.
ukanasknel wels Cemi klasis damrigebeli iyo skolis direqtori qalbatoni k...
wlis damlevs erTmaneTs gulTbilad gamoveTxoveT da oriveni cxare cremliT
vtirodiT. 1941 wlidan me da margo ebraelTa skolaSi (liceumSi) SevediT,
margo meoTxe klasSi, me ki pirvelSi.
jerjerobiT Cven oTxs ara gviSavs ra. da ai movatane dRevandel dRemde
da ricxvamde.
SabaTi, 20 ivnisi, 1942
Zvirfaso kiwi!
axlave unda daviwyo. irgvliv saocari siCumea. deda da mama Sin ar arian,
margo megobarTan wavida ping-pongis saTamaSod. bolo dros mec didi
siamovnebiT vTamaSob ping-pongs. radganac Cven, ping-pongistebs, Zalian gviyvars
nayinis Wama, gansakuTrebiT zafxulobiT, TamaSi Cveulebriv ebraelTaTvis erTerT xelmisawvdom kafeSi, `delfSi~ an `oazisSi~ gaseirnebiT Tavdeba. imis
dardi ar gvawuxebs, savse gvaqvs safule Tu carieli. sakonditroebi mudam
gaWedilia xalxiT. maT Soris yovelTvis moiZebneba romelime keTilismyofeli

Cveni nacnobebidan an Tayvanismcemeli, da imden nayins gvTavazoben xolme, rom

erT kvirasac ver moerevi.
warmomidgenia, rogor gikvirs, Cems asakSi rom Tayvanismcemlebze
vlaparakob. samwuxarod, Cvens skolaSi es gardauvali senia. rogorc ki
romelime biWi uflebas mTxovs, velosipediT saxlamde gamacilos, me ukve vici,
rom xsenebul biWs TavdaviwyebiT vuyvarvar da Tvals ver maSorebs. mcire xnis
Semdeg siyvaruli uneldeba, gansakuTrebiT maSin, roca arafrad vagdeb
Seyvarebulis gamoxedvas da mxiarulad vatrialeb pedalebs. zogjer Tu vinme
Zalian miwyalebs guls, velosipedze odnav Sevtortmandebi, CanTa mivardeba, da
zrdilobiani ymawvili iZulebulia velosipedidan Camoxtes. sanam CanTas
momawvdides, gonzec modis. aseTi Tayvanismcemlebi yovlad ucodvelebia, magram
arian iseTebic, romlebic haerovan kocnas migzavnian da Tavs mabezreben. CemTan
amgvari ram ar gadis. maSinve Camovxtebi velosipedidan da warbSekruli
vucxadeb, rom mis gverdiT yofna ar msurs, ase vTqvaT, Seuracxyofili var da
vurCev Sin wabrZandes.
ase, Cemo kiwi! Cvens megobrobas safuZveli Caeyara! xvalamde!
kvira, 21 ivnisi, 1942
Zvirfaso kiwi!
mTel Cvens klass cieb-cxeleba sWirs: pedagogiuri sabWo karze mogvadga.
naxevarma klasma sanaZleo dado vis gadaiyvanen da vin darCeba. me da mip de
iongi siciliT vkvdebiT Cveni ori mezoblis Semyure, romelTac naZlevSi
mTeli jibis fuli waages. `gadagiyvanen, dagtoveben, xo, ara...~ ase grZeldeba
dilidan saRamomde. Cveni mezoblebi verc mipis mavedrebelma mzeram moiyvana
gons da verc Cemma energiulma aRmzrdelobiTma RonisZiebebma. me rom mkiTxon,
naxevari klasi dasatovebelia, iseTi zarmacebi arian. marTalia, maswavleblebi
yovlad Wirveuli xalxia, magram, vin icis, iqneb Cvenda sasikeTod arian
Wirveulni.
me kargi urTierToba maqvs yvela maswavlebelTan. sul cxra
maswavlebeli gvyavs, Svidi kaci da ori qali. batoni kepleri, moxuci
maTematikis maswavlebeli, erT dros Zalian gabrazebuli iyo Cemze, radgan
ganuwyvetliv vybedobdi. man araerTxel gamafrTxila da bolos damsaja
damavala, damewera Txzuleba Temaze `ybedi~. hm, ybedi! aba ras dawer amaze?
magram didad ar Semiwuxebia Tavi. davalebebis rveuli CanTaSi Sevinaxe da
vcade pirze klite damedo. saRamos, roca sxva gakveTilebs movrCi, kepleris
davaleba momagonda. avtokalams vRrRnidi da vfiqrobdi, ra damewera. raRacis
dawera da striqonebis aWreleba yvelas SeuZlia, magram didi xelovnebaa,
monaxo damajerebeli sabuTi ybedobis sasargeblod. vfiqrobdi, didxans
vfiqrobdi da uecrad goneba gaminaTda. mocemuli sami gverdi sulmouTqmelad
gavavse, saqme gaiCarxa. sabuTad is moviyvane, rom ybedoba qaluri Tvisebaa,
magram me, cxadia, Sevecdebi Tavi Sevikavo, rom dedaCemic CemsaviT bevrs
laparakobs da rom memkvidreobiT gadmocemuli Tvisebebis aRmofxvra,
samwuxarod, TiTqmis SeuZlebelia.
baton keplers gaecina Cems axsna-ganmartebaze. magram roca gakveTilze
isev gavabi laqlaqi, meore Txzulebis dawera damavala: `gamousworebeli
laqlaqa~. es davalebac Sevasrule da or gakveTilze sanimuSod viqceodi.
mesameze kvlav metismeti momivida: da ai, anem isev miiRo sasjeli Txzuleba:
`yi, yi, yi, froilain yiyina~. mTelma klasma gadaixarxara. mec gamecina, Tumca
Cemi SemoqmedebiTi niWi laqlaqTan dakavSirebuli Txzulebebis weraSi
amowurulad mimaCnda. unda mepova raime axali, originaluri. Cemma megobarma
sanem, SesaniSnavma poetma, leqsis dawera mirCia da daxmarebac aRmiTqva. me
aRfrTovanebuli viyavi. keplers undoda abuCad avegde, magram me mas ormagad,
sammagad gadavuxdi samagieros, Tavad gavxdi sasacilod.
leqsi daiwera da didi warmateba xvda wilad. gavleqse deda batis, mama
gedisa da sami Wukis ambavi; mamam Wukebi bevri yiyinis gamo sasikvdilod
dakortna. sabednierod, kepleri mimixvda xumrobas da leqsi xmamaRla waikiTxa

komentarebiT CvenTanac da sxva klasebSic. mas Semdeg Tavisuflad SemiZlia

vilaqlaqo. kepleri aRar msjis, magram xSirad damcinis amis gamo.
ana
oTxSabaTi, 24 ivnisi, 1942
Zvirfaso kiwi!
autaneli sicxea, yvela qSinavs da oflad iRvreba. me ki am papanaqebaSi
sul fexiT davdivar. mxolod axla davrwmundi, Tu ra sasiamovno ramaa
tramvai, gansakuTrebiT ki Ria vagonebi. magram es siamovneba ebraelebisaTvis
aRar arsebobs. ra gaewyoba, sakuTari fexebiTac iolad gavalT. guSin
SuadRisas, Sesvenebaze, kbilis eqimTan unda wavsuliyavi, ian-liukenstraatze.
Cveni skolidan sakmaod Sorsaa. gza qalaqis baRs mihyveba. ise daviRale, rom
bolo gakveTilebze kinaRam CameZina. kidev kargi, keTili adamianebi bevria
qveynad, wyals mainc mogawvdian. kbilis eqimis asistenti qali ebraelebisadmi
TanagrZnobiTaa ganwyobili.
Cven ufleba gvaqvs visargebloT mxolod erTaderTi transportiT, patara
naviT, romelic iozefizraelskadesTan dgas. rogorc ki vTxoveT menaves,
maSinve meore napirze gadagviyvana. ra holandielebis bralia, ebraelebi rom
aseT dReSi varT. netav skolaSi siaruli ar mWirdebodes! saaRdgomo
ardadegebze velosipedi mompares, dedaCemis velosipedi ki mamam nacnobebs
miabara Sesanaxad. sabednierod ardadegebi axlovdeba, kidev erTi kvirac da
aRaraferi miWirs.
guSin diliT iseTi ram moxda, rac Zalian mesiamovna. roca im adgils
Cavuare, sadac Cveulebriv velosipedi medga, viRacam damiZaxa. movtrialdi da
davinaxe simpaTiuri ymawvili, romelsac wina saRamos Cemi skolis amxanagTan,
evasTan, Sevxvdi. ymawvili odnav darcxvenili Canda, Tavisi gvari da saxeli
miTxra: hari goldbergi. cota ar iyos gamikvirda, ver gamego, ra undoda. male
yvelaferi gairkva. skolamde surda gavecilebine. `Tu gza aqeT gaqvs, wamodi~,
vupasuxe me da gverdiT gavyevi. hari ukve 16 wlisaa da SesaniSnavad yveba
aTasgvar ambebs. am diliT isev melodeboda, amieridan, albaT, ase gagrZeldeba.
ana
samSabaTi, 30 ivnisi, 1942
Zvirfaso kiwi!
dRemde ver movicale SenTvis, mTeli xuTSabaTi nacnobebTan gavatare.
paraskevs stumrebi gvyavda da ase grZeldeba aqamde. me da hari am erT kviraSi
davuaxlovdiT erTmaneTs. man bevri ram miambo Tavis Tavze. Turme marto
Camosula holandiaSi bebiasTan da babuasTan, mSoblebi ki belgiaSi hyavs. adre
hari erT gogonasTan, fanisTan, dadioda. me vicnob fanis. Tvinierebisa da
mowyenilobis gansaxierebaa. magram mas Semdeg rac me gamicno, hari mixvda, rom
fanis gverdiT lamis CaeZinos. etyoba me gamovacocxle. arasodes ar ici, vis
raSi gamoadgebi!
SabaTs iopim CemTan gaaTia Rame, kviras ki lisisTan wavida. saSinlad
mowyenili viyavi.
saRamos hari unda mosuliyo. eqvsze damireka.
hari goldbergi gaxlavarT, Tu SeiZleba sTxoveT anas.
ana var, hari.
saRamo mSvidobisa, ana, rogor xar?
gmadlobT, kargad.
samwuxarod, am saRamos ver moval, magram SenTan salaparako maqvs.
SegiZlia aT wuTSi dabla Camoxvide?
kargi, Camoval.
tansacmeli swrafad gamovicvale da Tma gaviswore. Semdeg ki
fanjarasTan videqi da vRelavdi. bolos hari movida: moxda saocari ram kibe
kisristexiT ar Camirbenia, mSvidad videqi da velodi, rodis darekavda zars.

xolo roca zaris xma gavigone, dabla Cavedi. hari ise Semovarda saxlSi, rom
karis gaReba arc ki macala.
momismine, bebiaCems miaCnia, rom Sen CemTan SedarebiT bavSvi xar.
meubneba, lursebTan unda iaroo. etyoba mixvda, rom fanisTan urTierToba aRar
minda.
ratom, gana Sen da fanim iCxubeT?
ara, piriqiT, magram vuTxari, rom erTmaneTisaTvis Seufereblebi varT
da xSirad SenTan yofna ar minda, vuTxari isic, rom SegiZlia Tavisuflad
iaro CvenTan stumrad da zogjer me gestumrebi-meTqi. garda amisa, me megona,
fani sxva ymawvilebTanac megobrobs, magram Cemi varaudi ar gamarTlda da axla
biZaCemi meubneba: bodiSi mouxadeo. me ki ar minda, amitom gadavwyvite, sul aRar
Sevxvde. bebiaCemi mainc mTxovs fanisTan viaro da ara SenTan, magram maTTan
loliavisaTvis ar mcalia. moxucebs zogjer dromoWmuli Sexedulebebi aqvT.
marTalia, me damokidebuli var bebiaze, magram ramdenadme isic aris
damokidebuli Cemze. oTxSabaTobiT Tavisufali var, bebias da babuas hgoniaT,
xelobas vswavlob, me ki sionistTa krebebze davdivar. Cven sionistebi ara
varT, magram mainteresebda gamego, ras warmoadgenen sionistebi. bolo dros
raRac ar momwonan da aRarc vivli maTTan. ase rom, SegviZlia oTxSabaTs da
SabaTs dRisiTac SevxvdeT erTmaneTs da saRamosac, kviras ki naSuadRevs,
SeiZleba ufro xSiradac.
mismine, hari, Tu Sens bebias da babuas Cveni Sexvedra ar surT, Sen ar
unda eurCebode maT!
siyvaruls win veravin aRudgeba!
Cven wignebis maRazias gavcdiT da quCis kuTxesTan gavuxvieT, iq davinaxe
peter veseli viRac or biWTan erTad. ardadegebis Semdeg ar menaxa da Zalze
gamexarda. me da harim ramdenjerme SemoviareT mTeli kvartali. bolos
SevTanxmdiT, xval saRamos Svids rom xuTi wuTi daakldeba, mis saxlTan
davelodebi.
ana
paraskevi, 3 ivlisi, 1942
Zvirfaso kiwi!
guSin CvenTan hari movida Cemi mSoblebis gasacnobad. viyide torti, keqsi
da tkbileuloba. davlieT Cai, magram me da haris saxlSi jdoma mogvbezrda da
saseirnod wavediT. cxris aT wuTze ukanve momacila. mama saSinlad gajavrda,
gvian rom davbrundiT. ebraelTaTvis rva saaTis Semdeg Zalze saxifaToa quCaSi
siaruli. piroba miveci, rva saaTisaTvis mudam saxlSi viqnebi-meTqi.
xval harisTan var dapatiJebuli. Cemi megobari iopi ganuwyvetliv
damcinis haris gamo. me sruliadac ara var Seyvarebuli. nuTu ar SeiZleba
megobari gyavdes. ra aris cudi imaSi, rom megobari, anu rogorc dedaCemi
ambobs, kavaleri gyavdes. evam miambo: amas winaT hari yofila masTan da evas
ukiTxavs, vin ufro mogwons, fani Tu aneo. mas upasuxia: es Seni saqme araao. am
Temaze meti aRar usaubriaT, magram wasvlisas haris uTqvams: ra Tqma unda ana,
magram nuravis etyvio da oTaxidan gavardnila.
me vamCnev, haris TavdaviwyebiT vuyvarvar da mravalferovnebisaTvis
momwons kidec es ambavi. margom Tqva: `kargi ymawviliao~. mec ase mgonia. ara,
kargze ufro metia. deda aRfrTovanebulia: `mSvenieri axalgazrdaa, sandomiani,
zrdilio!~ mixaria, hari rom mTel ojaxs moewona, masac moswons yvela.
mxolod esaa, rom Cemi megobari gogonebi bavSvebad miaCnia da amaSi
marTalicaa.
ana
kvira, 5 ivlisi, 1942
Zvirfaso kiwi!
paraskevs gimnaziis wliuri aqti Cinebulad Catarda. Cven Semdeg klasSi
gadagviyvanes. cudi niSnebi ara maqvs. mxolod erTi `susti~ mirevia. xuTi myavs

algebraSi, or sxva saganSi eqvsianebi, danarCenebSi Svidianebi da bolos ori

rviani1. (1 holandiis skolebSi aTbaliani sistemaa. 10 saukeTeso niSania.) Cvenebi
kmayofilni darCnen. Tumca Cemi mSoblebi sxvebs ar hgvanan. maincdamainc did
yuradRebas ar aqceven kargsa da cud niSnebs, upiratesobas `wesier~ qcevas,
janmrTelobas da keTilganwyobilebas aniWeben. oRond aq iyos yvelaferi
rigze, danarCeni TavisTavad mova. me ki piriqiT, guliT mindoda, kargi mowafe
vyofiliyavi. me pirobiT mimiRes liceumSi, radgan montesoris skolis
ukanaskneli klasi ar damimTavrebia. raki moxda ise, rom yvela ebraeli
moswavle ebraelTa skolebSi unda gadasuliyo, direqtorma xangrZlivi
molaparakebis Semdeg me da lisi pirobiT migviRo. ar minda imedi gavucruo.
niSnebi Cemma dam, margomac moitana, rogorc yovelTvis, brwyinvale. jildo rom
arsebobdes, uTuod miiRebda da Semdeg klasSi qebis sigeliT gadavidoda, iseTi
Wkuis kolofia!
bolo dros mama xSiradaa saxlSi, kontoraSi veRar dadis.
saSineli grZnobaa, roca uecrad zedmeti aRmoCndebi. `travisi~ Caibara
batonma koophoisma, xolo batonma kralerma firma `koleni da kompania~,
romlis Tanamonawile mamac iyo. amas winaT, roca me da mama erTad
vseirnobdiT, `TavSesafarze~ Camomigdo sityva. miTxra, rom cudi dRe
dagvadgeba, Tu mTel qveyanas movwydebiT. vkiTxe, ratom ambob amas-meTqi. Sen
ici, miTxra man, rom ager erTi welia, rac tansacmeli, aveji da sursaTsanovage nacnob-megobrebTan gadagvaqvs. ar gvinda, germanelebma miiTvison Cveni
qoneba da miT umetes ar gvinda, Cven TviTon CavuvardeT maT xelSi. amitom
Tavad gaveclebiT, sanam Segvipyrobdnen.
mamas iseTi seriozuli saxe hqonda, rom SemeSinda.
rodis?
es nu gawuxebs, Svilo, mova dro da gaigeb. manamde ki isargeble
TavisuflebiT.
es iyo da es.
ah, neta Sors, Zalze Sors iyos is dRe!
ana
oTxSabaTi, 8 ivlisi, 1942
Zvirfaso kiwi!
kvira dilidan dRemde TiTqos wlebma ganvlo. imdeni ram moxda, TiTqos
dedamiwa ayiravda. magram, kiwi, jerjerobiT cocxali var da, rogorc mama
ambobs, mTavari swored esaa. diax, me jer kidev varsebob, magram nu mkiTxav, sad
da rogor. dRes, albaT, sruliad ar gesmis Cemi. amitom jer imas mogiyvebi, Tu
ra moxda kviris Semdeg.
sam saaTze (is iyo hari wavida da mogvianebiT isev unda mobrunebuliyo)
zari darekes. me araferi gamigonia, radgan aivanze nebivrad movikalaTe
Sezlongze da wigns vkiTxulobdi. uecrad karebs SeSinebuli margo moadga.
ana, mamas gestapodan uwyeba mouvida, miTxra man CurCuliT, deda baton
van daanTan gaiqca. me SiSma amitana. uwyeba... yvelam icis, ras niSnavs uwyebis
miReba: sakoncentracio banaks... Tvalwin warmomidga cixis sakani nuTu mama
iq unda gavuSvaT! ra Tqma unda, mama ar wava, Tqva margom mtkiced. Cven ukve
sastumro oTaxSi visxediT da dedas velodebodiT. deda van daanebTan wavida,
unda gadawyviton, gadavalT Tu ara xval `TavSesafarSi~. CvenTan erTad van
daanebic wamovlen. sul Svidni viqnebiT... irgvliv siCume sufevda. laparaks ver
vaxerxebdiT. vfiqrobdiT mamaze. is cuds arafers moelis, ebraelTa
TavSesafarSia wasuli davrdomilebis sanaxavad, romelTac mfarvelobas uwevs.
velodiT dedas... sicxem da sulierma daZabulobam sruliad dagvamunja.
uecrad zari darekes. `es haria~, wamoviZaxe me. `ar gaaRo~, SemaCera
margom, magram SiSi amao aRmoCnda. Cvenamde moaRwia dedisa da baton van daanis
xmam, romlebic haris elaparakebodnen. hari male wavida. deda da batoni van
daani ki saxlSi Semovidnen da karebi gadarazes. zaris yovel darekvaze me da

margo Cumad miviparebodiT dabla, rom gvenaxa, mama xom ar movida.

gadavwyviteT, sxva aravin SemogveSva saxlSi. me da margo oTaxidan
gagvistumres. van daans pirispir surda dedasTan saubari. rodesac oTaxSi
marto davrCiT, margom miTxra, rom uwyeba mas mouvida da ara mamas. margo
Teqvsmeti wlisaa. nuTu am xnis gogonebi marto unda gaasaxlon?.. sabednierod,
Cven mas arsad gavuSvebT. ase Tqva dedam, mamac uTuod amas gulisxmobda, roca
TavSesafarze melaparakeboda.
TavSesafari! sadaa netav? qalaqSi, soflad, romelime SenobaSi Tu qoxSi,
rodis wavalT, ra gziT, sad? ufleba ara mqonda am kiTxvebiT mimemarTa
vinmesTvis, magram gamudmebiT miRrRnida tvins.
me da margo SevudeqiT saskolo CanTebSi yvelaze saWiro nivTebis
Calagebas. pirveli, rac xelSi momxvda, es sqelydiani rveuli iyo. Semdeg
yvelaferi uwesrigod airia erTmaneTSi: bigudi, cxvirsaxocebi,
saxelmZRvaneloebi, savarcxeli, Zveli werilebi. vfiqrobdi, rogor
davimalebodiT da, RmerTma icis, ras ar vyridi CanTaSi. magram ar vnanob,
mogonebebi CemTvis kabebze ufro Zvirfasia.
xuT saaTze, rogorc iqna, mama dabrunda. mamam baton koophoiss daureka
da sTxova saRamos Semoevlo CvenTan. batoni van daani mipis mosayvanad wavida.
male mipi movida. fexsacmelebi, tansacmeli, paltoebi, cota TeTreuli da
windebi CemodanSi Caalaga da Segvpirda, saRamos isev movalo. saxlSi siCume
Camowva. arc erTs ar gvSioda. jer kidev Zalian cxeloda da yvelaferi metad
ucnaurad gamoiyureboda.
Cvens zemoT didi oTaxi daqiravebuli aqvs vinme baton goudsmits.
colTan gaSorebulia. ocdaaT wels iqneba mitanebuli. etyoba kvira dRes saqme
ar hqonda da aT saaTamde ijda CvenTan. verafriT ver movicileT. TerTmet
saaTze mipi da henk van santeni movidnen. mipi mamis kontoraSi 1933 wlidan
muSaobs da igi da misi axladgamoCekili qmari, penki, Cveni erTguli megobrebi
gaxdnen. mipis CemodanSi da penkis Rrma jibeebSi kvlav gauCinarda
fexsacmelebi, windebi, wignebi da sacvlebi. Tormetis naxevarze mZimed
datvirTulni gamogveTxoven. ise daviRale, rom arafris Tavi aRar mqonda.
Tumca vicodi, rom ukanasknelad vwvebodi sakuTar sawolSi, mainc imwamsve
CameZina. meore dRes, eqvsis naxevarze, dedam gamaRviZa. sabednierod,
guSindeliviT aRar cxeloda. mTeli dRe Tbili wvima scrida. oTxivem ise
Tbilad CavicviT, TiTqos macivarSi vapirebdiT Ramis gaTevas. magram Cven rac
SeiZleba meti tansacmeli unda wagveRo Tan. Cvens mdgomareobaSi veravin gabeda,
mZime CemodnebiT datvirTuli gamosuliyo gareT. mecva ori perangi, ori wyvili
winda, sami qveda sacvali, kaba, zed gadacmuli qvedatani, Jaketi, sazafxulo
palto, Cemi saukeTeso fexsacmeli, botebi, mexura qudi, zevidan kidev Sali da
raRac-raRacebi. kinaRam saxlSive davixrCvi, magram CemTvis aravis scaloda.
margom saskolo CanTa saxelmZRvaneloebiT gatena, velosipedze dajda da
mips CemTvis ucnob Soreul mxareSi gahyva. me jer kidev ar vicodi, romeli
saidumloebiT aRvsili adgili Segvikedlebda... Svidis naxevarze Cvenc
gamoviketeT kari. erTaderTi, visac gamovemSvidobe, Cemi sayvareli patara kata
morheni iyo. igi axali kargi patronis, Cveni mezoblis, xelSi rCeboda. baton
goudsmits amasTan dakavSirebiT baraTi davutoveT. samzareuloSi, magidaze,
katisTvis erTi girvanqa xorci davdeT. WurWeli aulagebeli dagvrCa, sawolebi
gausworebeli. yovelive es iseT STabeWdilebas tovebda, TiTqos
Tavqudmoglejilni gaviqeciT. CvenTvis sul erTi iyo, ras ityodnen sxvebi.
mxolod is gvindoda, droze gavclodiT aqaurobas, mSvidobianad migveRwia
daniSnul adgilamde.
danarCens xval mogwer!
ana
xuTSabaTi, 9 ivlisi, 1942
Zvirfaso kiwi!

ase mivrbodiT TavsxmaSi mama, deda da me, xelSi TiToeuls piramde

gatenili portfeli da xelCanTa gveWira. adrianad samuSaoze mimavali muSebi
TanagrZnobiT gviyurebdnen. saxeze etyobodaT, rom wuxdnen da vebralebodiT,
radgan amdeni tvirTi Tavad unda gvezida, transportiT sargeblobis ufleba
ki ar gvqonda. yvelas TvalSi xvdeboda yviTeli varskvlavi, rac sakmarisad
metyvelebda Cvens bedze. gzaSi mSoblebma dawvrilebiT miambes, rogor
SeimuSaves gaqcevis gegma. Tveebis manZilze saimedo adgilas gadagvqonda Cveni
aveji da tansacmlis nawili. axla yvelaferi mzad iyo da 16 ivliss TviTonve
vapirebdiT gaqcevas, magram uwyeba aTi dRiT adre movida da unda SevrigebodiT
im garemoebas, rom Senoba jer ar iyo saTanadod SekeTebuli. TavSesafari mamis
kantoraSia mowyobili. gareSe pirTaTvis es Zneli gasagebia, amitom ufro
dawvrilebiT agixsni. mamas mosamsaxureTa mcirericxovani Stati hyavda
yovelTvis: batoni kraleri, batoni koophoisi, mipi da eli voseni, ocdasami
wlis stenografisti. Cveni adgilsamyofeli yvelam icis. saidumlo ar gavandeT
mxolod elis mamas, romelic sawyobSi muSaobs da mis or xelqveiT muSas.
saxlis gegma aseTia: pirvel sarTulze didi sawyobia, aqvea
saeqspedicioc. sawyobis karis gverdiT saxlSi Sesasvleli karia, romelic
ormagia da patara kibemde miyavxar. Tu am kibes ahyvebi, miadgebi mqrqalminian
kars, romelzedac odesRac Savi asoebiT ewera `kontora~. es mTavari kontoraa,
Zalze didi da Zalian naTeli, mudam xalxiT gaWedili. dRisiT aq muSaoben
mipi, eli da batoni koophoisi. gasasvleli oTaxis gavliT, sadac dgas
sxvadasxva zomis karadebi, didi bufeti da seifi, moxvdebi naxevrad bnel ukana
oTaxSi. aq adre baton kraleri da batoni van daani isxdnen, axla ki mxolod
kraleri darCa. am oTaxSi derefnidanac SeiZleba Semosvla minis karis
meSveobiT, romelic Signidan advilad iReba, garedan ki gaWirvebiT. kraleris
oTaxidan derefans gahyvebi, oTxsafexurian kibes aivli da saukeTeso oTaxSi
aRmoCndebi. esaa direqtoris kabineti muqi, didebuli avejiT, noxebiT mofenili
linoleumgadakruli iataki, radiomimRebi, Zvirfasi, moxdenili lampebi,
yvelaferi saukeTeso xarisxisa da iSviaTi naxelavia. kabinetis gverdiT, didi
farTo samzareuloa, sadac dgas Tbili wylis rezervuari `titani~ da
gazis ori qura. iqvea sapirfareSoc. aseTia pirveli sarTuli.
grZeli gasasvlelidan xis kibiT adixar wina oTaxSi, romelic derefanSi
gadadis. marjvniv da marcxniv karebia. marcxena kari uerTdeba Senobis mTavar
nawils, sadac sawyobis saTavsoebia, sakuWnao, mansarda da sxveni. meore mxridan
Senobas aqvs kidev erTi grZeli, metismetad cicabo, namdvili holandiuri
kisrismosatexi kibe, romelic quCis meore mxares gamavali karisken gagiyvans.
marjvena kari Cveni TavSesafrisaa. aravis mouva azrad, rom am ubralo,
nacrisfrad SeRebili karis ukan amdeni oTaxia ganlagebuli. erT safexurs
aivli da maSinve TavSesafarSi aRmoCndebi. am Sesasvlelis pirdapir cicabo
kibea. marcxniv momcro derefniT Sedixar im oTaxSi, romelic frankebis ojaxis
sasadilo da sawoli iqneba. gverdiT kidevaa erTi, SedarebiT patara oTaxi.
frankebis ori norCi mandilosnis sawoli da samuSao oTaxi. kibidan
mxarmarjvniv ufanjro oTaxia, sadac mowyobilia pirsabani da calke
gamoyofili sapirfareSo. am oTaxsa da me da margos sawols Soris karia
datanebuli. roca kibes zeviT ahyvebi da kars gaaReb, gakvirvebs is ambavi, rom
am Zveli saxlis ukana nawilSi aseT did, lamaz da naTel oTaxs waawydi. am
oTaxSi dgas gazis qura da WurWlis sarecxi magida (Cvens gadmosaxlebamde aq
firmis laboratoria iyo). axla aq iqneba samzareulo, sasadilo da van
daanebis kabineti da sawoli oTaxi. pawia, gasasvlel oTaxs peter van daani
daeufleba. rogorc saxlis wina nawilSi, aqacaa sxveni da mansarda. ai, ukve
gagacani mTeli Cveni TavSesafari.
ana
paraskevi, 10 ivlisi, 1942
Zvirfaso kiwi!

iqneb saSinlad mogabezre Tavi Cveni TavSesafris gauTavebeli aRweriT,

magram xom unda icode, sad gamomriya talRam! da radganac jer yvelaferi ar
miambnia, ganvagrZob. mivaRwieT Tu ara prinsengraxtamde, mipma maSinve agviyvana
zeviT, TavSesafarSi, kari mogviketa da martoni davrCiT. margo velosipediT
gacilebiT adre mosuliyo da ukve gvelodeboda. ara marto Cveni, aramed sxva
oTaxebic ZvelmanebiT movaWris sakuWnaos gavda. SeuZlebelia amis aRwera!
mTeli muyaos yuTebi da Cemodnebi, romlebic Tveebis ganmavlobaSi aq
gadmohqondaT, uwesrigod eyara irgvliv. patara oTaxi Weramde aevsoT
sawolebiT da qveSagebliT. Tu saRamos wesierad gawyobil sawolebSi
vapirebdiT Zils, axlave unda SevdgomodiT dalagebas. dedas da margos
arafris Tavi ar hqondaT. gunebamowamlulni iyvnen da leibebze miwvnen. me da
mamaCemi, Cveni ojaxis ori `damlagebeli~ maSinve SevudeqiT saqmes. bargi
gavxseniT, mivalag-movalageT, vferTxeT, vwmindeT, vrecxeT da saRamos
saSinlad daRlilebi mkvdrebiviT daveyareT sufTa sawolebze. mTeli dRis
ganmavlobaSi cxeli saWmeli ar Cagvsvlia pirSi. Tumca es arc iyo saWiro.
dedas da margos zedmeti nervulobisagan Wama ar SeeZloT, me da mamas ki
amisTvis ar gvecala. samSabaTs dilidan kvlav saqmes movkideT xeli. elim da
mipma Cveni sasursaTo baraTebiT raRaca gviyides, mamam SuqSeniRbva moagvara,
bolos jagrisiT movrecxeT samzareuloSi iataki, erTi sityviT, yvelani
dilidan saRamomde vmuSaobdiT. oTxSabaTamde sruliad ar mqonda dro mefiqra
im did gardatexaze, romelic Cems cxovrebaSi moxda. TavSesafarSi mosvlis
droidan mxolod oTxSabaTs vcade pirvelad gavrkveuliyavi mTel am ambavSi,
meambna SenTvis yvelaferi, rac SegvemTxva da rac SeiZleba SegvemTxvas
amieridan.
ana
SabaTi, 11 ivlisi, 1942
Zvirfaso kiwi!
mama, deda da margo verafriT ver SeeCvivnen vesterturmis zaris rekvas,
romelic yovel meoTxed saaTSi gaismis. me ki SeveCvie da momwons kidec,
gansakuTrebiT RamRamobiT rogorRac mamSvidebs. albaT, Zalian ginda icode,
rogor momwons Cveni TavSesafari. marTali rom giTxra, jer Tavadac ar vici,
ase mgonia, aq verasodes ver vigrZnob Tavs ise, rogorc saxlSi. amiT imis Tqma
ki ar minda, rom aqauroba Semzaravi da uRimRamoa. zogjer iseTi grZnoba maqvs,
TiTqos raRac saocar pansionSi aRmovCndi. TavSesafris aseTi aRqma ucnauria,
ara, Sen ras ityvi? Tumca saxlis is nawili, sadac Cven vimalebiT, idealuri
TavSesafaria, ra vuyoT, rom nestiani da cota mibrecil-mobrecilia. aseT
moxerxebul samalavs verc amsterdamSi ipovi da albaT verc mTel holandiaSi.
aqamde Cveni oTaxis kedlebi sruliad SiSveli iyo. sabednierod, mamas
mTeli Cemi kinovarskvlavebisa da peizaJebis koleqcia wamoeRo da funjisa da
webos daxmarebiT kedlebi avaWrele. axla Cveni oTaxi Tvals axarebs. roca van
daanebi movlen, sxvenze dawyobili ficrebisagan ganjinebsa da sxva saWiro
nivTebs gavakeTebT.
margo da deda Tavs ukeT grZnoben. guSin dedam pirvelad gadawyvita,
muxudosagan wvniani moemzadebina. magram qveviT Cavida, laparaks Sehyva da
sadili sruliad gadaaviwyda. wveni amoSra, muxudo danaxSirda, verafriT ver
amovfxikeT qvabidan. mwyins, rom Cvens maswavlebels, keplers, am ambavs ver
vuambob... memkvidreobis Teoria!
guSin saRamos yvelani kabinetSi CavediT. gvindoda inglisis
radiogadacema mogvesmina. me saSinelma SiSma amitana, megona romelime mezobeli
SegvamCnevda da vemudarebodi mamas, isev zeviT avsuliyaviT. deda mimixvda da
isic gamogvyva. saerTod, yvelas gvawuxebs is ambavi, rom SeiZleba vinmem
dagvinaxos an Cven saubars mohkras yuri. pirvel dResve SevkereT fardebi.
sinamdvileSi es mxolod sxvadasxva formisa da feris nakuwebia, romlebic me
da mamam SevakowiweT. Cveni iSviaTi naxelavi knopebiT fanjrebis CarCoebze
davamagreT da, sanam aq viqnebiT, ar CamovxsniT. Cveni saxlis gverdiT didi

kontoraa. marcxniv avejis saxelosno. am SenobaSi samuSao dRis damTavrebis

Semdeg aRaravin rCeba, magram xom SeiZleba xma gavides. margos, romelic
saSinlad gaciebulia, Rame daxveleba avukrZaleT. sabralom dausruleblad
kodeini unda ylapos.
maxarebs is ambavi, rom samSabaTs van daanebi gadmovlen. ufro myudrod
viqnebiT, aRarc aseTi siCume iqneba. siCume Zalze manerviulebs, gansakuTrebiT
saRamoobiT da RamiT. ras ar mivcemdi, erT-erTi Cveni mfarveli rom CvenTan
aTevdes Rames. ver SevCvevivar im ambavs, rom sruliad ar SegviZlia quCaSi
gasvla, meSinia. iseTi grZnoba maqvs, TiTqos aRmogvaCenen da dagvxvreten.
amgvari fiqrebi guls miRrRnis. dRisiTac Zalian Cumad unda viyoT. ar
SeiZleba bakuniT siaruli da Cveni xma rom dabla, sawyobSi ar gaigonon,
TiTqmis CurCuliT gvixdeba laparaki. viRac meZaxis!
ana
paraskevi, 14 agvisto, 1942
Zvirfaso kiwi!
erTi Tvea, xma ar gamicia SenTvis, magram raime axali da mniSvnelovani
yoveldRe ar xdeba. camet ivliss van daanebi gadmovidnen. Tumca pirobis
Tanaxmad ToTxmetSi velodiT, magram germanelebi im dReebSi sul ufro da
ufro met ebraelebs iZaxebdnen. saerTod, didi areulobaa. amitom sabediswero
dagvianebas amjobines erTi dRiT adre gadmosuliyvnen. diliT, aTis naxevarze,
roca, Cven jer kidev vsauzmobdiT, peter van daani mogvadga. 16 wlis ymawvilia,
sakmaod mosawyeni da morcxvi, romlis mezoblobisagan bevrs arafers veli.
naxevari saaTis Semdeg gamocxaddnen col-qmari van daanebi: colma saqude
yuTiT Ramis qoTani moitana, ramac saerTo mxiaruleba gamoiwvia. `ar SemiZlia
am WurWlis gareSe arseboba~, ganacxada man da saWiro sagani maSinve sawolis
qveS moaTavsa. marTalia, qmars Ramis qoTani ar moutania, magram iRliaSi
dasakeci magida hqonda amoCrili. pirvel dRes yvelani erTad visxediT
myudrod, sami dRis Semdeg ki iseTi grZnoba gvqonda, TiTqos mudam erT did
ojaxad gvecxovros. TavisTavad cxadia, im erTi kviris ganmavlobaSi, romelic
van daanebma adamianebs Soris gaatares, bevri ram ganicades da yvelaferi
gviambes. Cven yvelaze metad gvainteresebda Cveni binisa da baton goudsmitis
ambavi.
batonma van daanma gviambo: orSabaTs, dilis cxra saaTze, goudsmitma
damireka da mTxova Semevlo masTan. maCvena baraTi, romelic Tqven dautoveT
(werdiT, visTvis mieca kata). goudsmits Zalze eSinoda saxlis gaCxrekis,
amitom magida avalageT da iqauroba odnav movasufTaveT. uecrad frau frankis
saweri magidis kalendris furcelze raRac warweras movkari Tvali.
maastrixtis misamarTi aRmoCnda. me imwamsve mivxvdi, rom es Segnebuli
`daudevrobaa~, magram gakvirvebuli saxe miviRe da SeSinebuli vemudarebodi
baton goudsmits sabediswero kalendris furceli daewva. sanam iq viyavi,
mxolod imas vuCiCinebdi, rom araviTari warmodgena ar mqonda Tqvens
ganzraxvaze. da uecrad, TiTqos es-esaa movisazre, raSia saqme, veubnebi: `batono
goudsmit, mivxvdi, visicaa es misamarTi. daaxloebiT naxevari wlis winaT
CvenTan kontoraSi Semovida gavleniani germaneli oficeri, romelic batoni
frankis bavSvobis megobari aRmoCnda. dapirda, Tu aq SenTvis saxifaTo
mdgomareoba Seiqmneba, dagexmarebio. am oficris samxedro nawili maastrixtSi
idga. SeiZleba dapireba Seasrula da frankebis ojaxi belgiaSi gadaiyvana,
iqidan ki maT naTesavebTan SveicariaSi. es ambavi SegiZliaT gaandoT frankebis
yvela karg nacnobs, Tu maT moikiTxaven, oRond gTxovT, maastrixts nu
axsenebT~. me male wamovedi. axla es ambavi Tqveni nacnobebis umravlesobam
icis. am versiam Cemamdec bevrjer moaRwia sxvadasxvanairad.
van daanebis naambobma aRtacebaSi mogviyvana, gulianad vicineT, ras ar
warmoidgens xalxi. Turme erTi ojaxi amtkicebda, TiTqos dagvinaxa, rogor
mivqrodiT dilaadrian yvelani velosipedebiT. xolo viRac qalbatoni imasac
ki yveboda, TiTqos SuaRamiT samxedro manqanam wagviyvana.

ana
paraskevi, 21 agvisto, 1942
Zvirfaso kiwi!
Cveni TavSesafari namdvil samalavad iqca. baton kralers brwyinvale
azri daebada, amogveqola kari, romelic Cveni saxlis ukana nawilSi gamodis da
winidan rame migveSenebina. am bolo dros velosipedebs eZeben da xSirad
Cxreken saxlebs. gegma batonma vosenma ganaxorciela: gaakeTa moZravi Taro,
romelic erT mxares kariviT iReba. cxadia, amis gamo misTvisac unda gagvendo
saidumlo da axla mzadaa, yvelaferSi dagvexmaros. roca qveviT Cadixar, jer
unda daixaro da mere gadaxte, radgan safexuri moxsnilia. sami dRis Semdeg
yvelas saSineli kopebi gvajda Sublze. daxra gvaviwydeboda da SubliT dabal
kars vexeTqebodiT. bolos karis Tavze burbuSeliT gatenili baliSi mivaWedeT.
vnaxoT, ra samsaxurs gagviwevs.
cotas vkiTxulob, jerjerobiT isic ki gadamaviwyda, rac skolaSi
maswavles. cxovreba aq erTferovania. batoni van daani da me xSirad vCxubobT.
misi azriT, margo Cemze ufro sandomiania. deda ise meqceva, rogorc patara
bavSvs, me ki amas ver vitan. arc peteri uqnia RmerTs. baiyuSia, mTeli dRe
usaqmurad goravs sawolze, Cxirkedelaobs, xandaxan raRacas Tlis da mere isev
Tvlems. namdvili Zilis gudaa! amindebi Tbilia da sxvenze gatanil
Sezlongebze vnebivrobT.
ana
oTxSabaTi, 2 seqtemberi, 1942
Zvirfaso kiwi!
batonma da qalbatonma van daanebma saSinlad iCxubes. aseTi ram jer ar
minaxavs cxovrebaSi. deda da mama arafris gulisTvis ar Seuyvirebdnen ase
erTmaneTs. Cxubis sababi imdenad umniSvnelo iyo, rom amaze laparakic ki ar
Rirs. Tumca yvelas erTnairi xasiaTi rodi aqvs. peterisTvis or cecxls Sua
dgoma saSinelebaa, magram mas angariSs aravin uwevs, radgan zarmaci da
zlozniaa. guSin ena mTlianad gaulurjda, saSinlad aRelda, magram silurjem
male gauara. dRes ki yelze sqeli Sali Semouxvevia da ambobs, Wvlebi maqvs,
filtvebi, guli da Tirkmelebi mtkivao. ras ar moigonebs es biWi, namdvili
ipoxondrikia (mgoni, amas ase hqvia, ara?).
qalbaton van daans verc deda ewyoba maincdamainc: saamisod uamravi
mizezi aqvs. Tundac erTi magaliTi: TeTreulis saerTo karadaSi qalbatonma
van daanma mxolod sami zewari Cado yovlad keTilSobiluri ganzraxviT, rom
Cveni TeTreuli exmara da sakuTars gafrTxileboda. erTob gaukvirdeba, roca
gaigebs, rom dedam mis karg magaliTs mibaZa. qalbatoni ganuwyvetliv javrobs
imis gamo, rom mis WurWels vxmarobT da ara Cvensas, sul imis cdaSia, Cvens
faifurs miagnos da warmodgena ara aqvs, ra axlos zis masTan! servizi sxvenze
SevinaxeT sxvadasxva reklamebis qveS. da sanam aq viqnebiT, isic iq ideba. Zalze
marcxiani xeli maqvs. guSin maTlafa gamivarda. gacofebulma qalbatonma iyvira:
`o, frTxilad! meti araferi gamaCnia!~ magram batoni van daani ratomRac
melaquceba.
am diliT deda Wkuas didxans marigebda. amas ver vitan. Cveni
Sexedulebebi Zalze gansxvavdeba erTmaneTisagan. mama sul sxvanairia, Cemi
esmis, maSinac ki, roca xuTiode wuTiT gamibrazdeba.
wina kviras erTi ambavi moxda. sababi qalebze dawerili wigni... da peteri
iyo. saWiroa icode, kiwi, rom margos da peters ufleba aqvT waikiTxon yvela
wigni, romelic baton koophoiss biblioTekidan moaqvs, magram am wignis
wakiTxvis ufleba arc erTs ar misces.
cxadia, peters cnobismoyvareoba aReZra, albaT, fiqrobda, ra unda
eweros wignSi, romlis wakiTxvasac ukrZalavdnen. wigni Cumad mopara dedamiss
da nadavliTurT sxvenze daimala. or dRes simSvide sufevda. dedamisma
yvelaferi gaigo, magram ar gasca. uecrad saqmeSi mamamisi Caeria. gabrazda,

peters wigni waarTva da amiT sakiTxi amowurulad CaTvala. magram man ver
gansazRvra, Tu rogorma cnobismoyvareobam Seipyro misi vaJi. peteris azriT,
mamis energiuli moqmedeba sruliad ar niSnavda imas, rom sakuTar ganzraxvaze
xeli aeRo. daiwyo fiqri, Tu rogor Caegdo kvlav xelSi `idumalebiT savse~
wigni. qalbatonma van daanma dedaCems rCeva hkiTxa. dedam uTxra, es wigni
margosTvisac Seuferebelia, Tumca sxva wignebis sawinaaRmdego araferi maqvso.
qalbatono van daan, margosa da peters Soris didi gansxvavebaa,
ganagrZo dedam, jer erTi, gogonebi metwilad biWebze ufro adre
mwifdebian, meorec, margo Zalian bevrs kiTxulobs da icnobs Rrma, seriozul
nawarmoebebs, xolo mesame, margo peterze ufro ganaTlebuli da
gonebagaxsnilia. margom TiTqmis daamTavra liceumi.
principSi qalbatoni van daani daeTanxma dedas, magram mainc ganacxada,
rom araferi saWiroa, axalgazrdebs igive wignebi mivceT, romelTac ufrosebi
kiTxulobeno.
wignis xelSi Casagdebad peteri mxolod xelsayrel SemTxvevas eloda.
meore saRamos, roca mTeli ojaxi direqtoris kabinetSi ijda da
radiogadacemas usmenda, peterma wigni moipara da sxvenze aZvra, cxris
naxevarze dabla unda Camosuliyo, magram kiTxvam ise gaitaca, rom dro
gadaaviwyda, da sxvenidan im dros CamoZvra, roca mamamisi oTaxSi Sevida.
SegiZlia warmoidgino, ra ambavi atyda... mogvesma gamayruebeli silis lawani,
xelis kvra, wigni magidisaken moisroles, peteri ki, albaT, oTaxis kuTxisaken.
col-qmari marto gamovida savaxSmod. peteri aravis mohgonebia, uvaxSmod
datoves, mSieri unda dawoliliyo. gadavediT dRis wesrigze, e. i. SevudeqiT
vaxSmobas. uecrad moisma yurTasmenis wamRebi stvena. gavqvavdiT, gafiTrebulni
SevyurebdiT erTmaneTs, dana-Cangali xelidan gagvivarda. magram am dros
Rumlis milidan mogvesma peteris xma:
tyuilad ggoniaT, rom dabla Camoval.
batoni van daani wamovarda da WarxaliviT gawiTlebulma iyvira:
ara, es ukve metismetia!
mama baton van daans xelebSi swvda, eSinoda peters cudi araferi
damarToso da zeviT erTad avidnen. gaSmagebuli winaaRmdegobisa da saSineli
xmauris Semdeg peteri Zirs Camoiyvanes da Tavis oTaxSi Caketes. gulkeTil
dedikos surda SvilisaTvis buterbrodi gadaenaxa, magram mamamisi ulmobeli
aRmoCnda.
Tu axlave bodiSs ar moixdis, sxvenze daiZinos!
Cven yvelam protesti ganvacxadeT da vamtkicebdiT, rom uvaxSmod
datoveba sakmarisi sasjelia. sxvenze SeiZleba gacivdes, xolo aq eqimsac ki
ver moviwvevT.
peterma bodiSis moxda ar indoma da sxvenze avida. baton van daans Tavi
ise eWira, TiTqos Svilis dardi ar hqonda, magram meore diliT darwmunda, rom
mis vaJiSvils sakuTar sawolSi eZina. Svid saaTze peteri isev sxvenze avida.
mamamisma xangrZlivi Segonebis Semdeg, rogorc iqna, daiyolia, Zirs
Camosuliyo.
sami dRis ganmavlobaSi yvela moRuSuli dadioda da jiutad dumda.
Semdeg yvelaferi Zveleburad warimarTa.
ana
oTxSabaTi, 21 seqtemberi, 1942
Zvirfaso kiwi!
dRes yoveldRiur wvrilmanebze minda giambo. qalbatoni van daani
autanelia. yovel wuTs mTaTxavs imis gamo, rom bevrs vlaparakob. raRacas
moigonebs da sicocxles gvimwarebs. xan ityvis WurWels aRar gavrecxavo da Tu
mainc garecxa, qvabis Zirze darCenil saWmels CvensaviT minis TefSze ki ar
amoiRebs, aramed Sig tovebs, afuWebs. amis gamo margos orjer meti WurWlis
garecxva uxdeba da am dros es qalbatoni eubneba:
Cemo margo, Sen marTlac bevri saqme gaqvs.

me da mamam SesaniSnavi TavSesaqcevi movnaxeT. vadgenT Cveni ojaxis

genealogias da drodadro yovel winaparze raRacas miambobs. me maTTan
erTgvar kavSirs vgrZnob. yovel or kviraSi baton koophoiss moaqvs
gogonebisaTvis gankuTvnili ramdenime wigni. aRtacebuli var `iop-ter-heulis~
seriiT, amasTan erTad Zalian momwons cisi fon maksfeldis nawarmoebebic.
`mxiaruli zafxuli~ ramdenjerme wavikiTxe da axlac vicini, roca sasacilo
adgilebs vawydebi. kvlav SevudeqiT swavlas. yoveldRe xuT uweso zmnas
vizepireb da saRamoTi mondomebiT vswavlob franguls. peteri inglisurs
CasCiCinebs da xvneSis. miviReT axali saxelmZRvaneloebi; rveulebis, fanqrebis,
warwerebis, saSlelebisa da amdagvaris maragi saxlidan gamogvyva.
xSirad vismen `oranes~ gadmocemas. axlaxan laparakobda princi
bernhardi da gamogvicxada, rom ianvarSi isev elodebian memkvidres.
yvelas ukvirs, ratom miyvars ase holandiis samefo ojaxi.
ramdenime dRis win vsaubrobdiT imaze, rom jer kidev bevri ram maqvs
saswavli da amitom gaorkecebuli gulmodginebiT Sevudeqi zuTxvas. aba ra
saxalisoa momavalSi yvelafris Tavidan dawyeba. aRiniSna isic, rom am bolo
dros xeiriani araferi wamikiTxavs. deda axla kiTxulobs wigns, romlis
saTauria `batonebi, qalbatonebi da mosamsaxureebi~. am wignis wakiTxva CemTvis
ar SeiZleba. jer iseTive ganaTlebuli unda gavxde, rogoric Cemi Wkviani,
niWieri daa. visaubreT agreTve filosofiaze, fsiqologiasa da fiziologiaze
(rom vicode, rogor iwereba es Zneli sityvebi, leqsikonSi Cavixede), razedac
jerjerobiT araviTari warmodgena ar maqvs. imedia, momaval wels cotaTi mainc
Sevavseb am xarvezs!
Cemda samwuxarod aRmovaCine, rom zamTrisaTvis mxolod erTi
grZelsaxeloiani kaba da sami Salis Jaketi maqvs. mamam neba damrTo cxvris
TeTri matylisagan puloveri momeqsova. matyli Tumca uxeiroa, magram Tbilia.
Cven uamravi tansacmeli gvaqvs gabarebuli nacnobebTan, magram misi wamoReba
mxolod omis damTavrebis Semdeg SeiZleba da isic Tu raime gadarCeba.
swored im dros, roca qalbaton van daanze raRacas vwerdi, igi oTaxSi
Semovida. dRiuri, ra Tqma unda, maSinve davxure.
oh, ana, wamakiTxe Tu SeiZleba!
ara, qalbatono van daan, ar SeiZleba!
Tundac ukanaskneli gverdi?
ara, arc ukanaskneli!
Zalian SemeSinda, swored am gverdze ewera arcTu ise sasiamovno ram
qalbaton van daanze.
ana
paraskevi, 25 seqtemberi, 1942
Zvirfaso kiwi!
guSin isev avedi zeviT, `vestumre~ van daanebs, waviWoraveT. zogjer
maTTan yofna sasiamovnoa. mivirTviT `naftalinis keqsi~ (keqsiani kolofi ido
tansacmlis karadaSi, sadac blomad eyara naftalini) da limonaTi davayoleT.
vlaparakobdiT peterze. vTqvi, rom xSirad Tavs mabezrebs, me ki es ar
momwons, radgan ver vitan biWebs, romlebic `xelebs afaTureben~. maT, rogorc
mSoblebs sCveviaT, mkiTxes: xom ar visurvebdi ufro metad davaxloebodi
peters, radganac aSkarad Zalian movwonvar. `rogor ara~, gavifiqre me, magram
vTqvi: `o, ara~. peteri morcxvi da mouqnelia, rogorc yvela biWi, romelsac
naklebad uvlia gogoebTan.
Cveni samalavis `iatakqveSa komiteti~ Zalze moxerxebuli aRmoCnda. yuri
damigde, ai ra gamoigones am vaJbatonebma! Zalian undaT, batonma van diikma,
`travisis~ firmis mTavarma warmomadgenelma da Cvenma kargma nacnobma,
romelsac bevri ram mivabareT, miiRos Cvengan raime cnoba. am mizniT ziuivSflandernis erT meafTiaqes misweres werili, sadac raRacas ekiTxebodnen.
pasuxisaTvis werilSi Cades konverti, romelsac mamam sakuTari xeliT daawera
Cveni firmis misamarTi. roca es werili ukan mova, meafTiaqis pasuxs amoiReben

da mis magivrad mama Tavis werils Cadebs. ase gaigebs van diiki, rom mama
cocxalia. arCevani SeaCeres zeelandze. romelic belgiis sazRvarTan
mdebareobs da amitom iq advilad SeiZleba werilis kontrabandiT gagzavna.
ana
kvira, 27 seqtemberi, 1942
Zvirfaso kiwi!
dedasTan usiamovneba momivida da es ukve meramdened am bolo dros! Cven
xSirad ar gvesmis erTmaneTis, verc margosTan vaxerxeb saerTo enis gamonaxvas.
Cvens ojaxSi, ra Tqma unda, arasodes ar gaimarTeba iseTi scenebi, rogorc
zeviT, magram me arc Cveni urTierToba momwons. me sul sxva xasiaTi maqvs,
vidre dedas da margos. zogjer ukeT mesmis Cemi megobari gogonebis, vidre
sakuTari dedis. o, rarigad mwyins!
qalbatoni van daani kvlav ucnaurad iqceva. cdilobs, rac SeiZleba meti
gadamalos da Caketos im nivTebidan, rac ojaxs sWirdeba. kargi iqneba, dedac
rom aseve moiqces!..
etyoba, zogierT mSoblebs gansakuTrebul siamovnebas hgvris ara marto
sakuTari Svilebis aRzrda, aramed nacnobebisac. swored aseTebi arian van
daanebi. margos aRzrda ar sWirdeba. igi siyvarulis, sikeTisa da gonierebis
gansaxierebaa. magram is, rac mas Warbad aqvs, me Zalze maklia. CemTvis
araerTxel mouciaT SeniSvnebi sufrasTan, me ki Tavs ver vikaveb ukmexi da
gamomwvevi pasuxebisagan. mama da deda mudam Cems mxarezea, ar vici, ra
meSveleboda uimaTod! `zemourebi~ Zalian xSirad misayvedureben, bevrs
laparakob, yvelaferSi erevi, Tavmdabloba gakliao, magram me mainc Zvel
Secdomebs vimeoreb. mama rom ase momTmeni ar iyos, me albaT didi xania
davkargavdi gamosworebis imeds. Tumca is, rasac Cemgan Cemi mSoblebi
moiTxoven, Zneli gansaxorcielebeli araa.
bostneuli ar miyvars. Tu bevr kartofils da cota bostneuls
gadmoviReb, van daanebi, amas `ganebivrebas~ aweren da saSinlad javroben.
cota kidev daimate bostneuli, meubneba im wamsve qalbatoni van
daani.
ara, gmadlobT, me marto kartofili minda.
bostneuli Zalian margebelia, xom xedav dedaSenic amasve ambobs,
gadaiRe kidev! daJinebiT moiTxovs igi da ase grZeldeba manamde, sanam mama
ar Caereva.
CvenTan unda ecxovra, ambobs gacxarebuli qalbatoni, CvenTan
aseTi ram ar gauvidoda! es ra aRzrdaa! ane saSinlad ganebivrebulia! Cemi
qaliSvili unda yofiliyo!
sayvedurebis niaRvars mudam am sityvebiT amTavrebs. ra bednierebaa, rom
misi qaliSvili ara var!
davubrundeT isev aRzrdis sakiTxs. guSin, roca qalbatonma van daanma
enis tartali moaTava da dumili Camovarda, mamam ai, ra uTxra:
me mgoni, ana kargadaa aRzrdili. imasac ki mixvda, rom jobia Tqven
gauTavebel qadagebas yuradReba ar miaqcios, xolo rac Seexeba bostneuls, me
mxolod erTi ram SemiZlia vTqva: `Vice versa!~1 (1 piriqiT (laT.))
axla ki gvarianad moxvda qalbaton van daans. Vice versa imas niSnavda, rom
TviTonac cota bostneuls miirTmevs. Tavs imiT imarTlebs, Zilis win bevri
bostneuli mawyinariao. rac unda is qnas, oRond Tavi damanebos! sasaciloa,
roca xedav, ra advilad wiTldeba qalbatoni van daani. me es ar momdis da
amazec javrobs.
ana
orSabaTi, 28 seqtemberi, 1942
Zvirfaso kiwi!
guSin bevri ram mqonda kidev dasaweri, magram iZulebuli gavxdi
Semewyvita. minda mogiyve erTi Cxubis ambavi, magram manamde ai, ra unda giTxra.

me mezizReba da Tanac ar mesmis, roca ufrosebi xSirad, raRac umniSvnelo

wvrilmanebis gamo, uecrad aReldebian da Cxubs iwyeben. aqamde megona, Cxubi
mxolod bavSvebis saqmea da ufrosebs ar axasiaTebs. Tumca zogjer marTlac
arsebobs Cxubis mizezi, magram gamudmebuli kinklaobis atana SeuZlebelia.
kacma rom Tqvas, aqamde unda SevCveodi am ambavs, radgan Cxubi maT ojaxSi
lamis Cveulebrivi movlenaa, magram araferi gamomdis. `diskusiebi~ (ase
uwodeben aq Cxubs) mudam Cems irgvliv trialebs. yovelmxriv maqiaqeben,
yvelafers msjelobis sagnad xdian, Cems xasiaTs, qcevas, TavdaWeras. yvelafers
mikritikeben da miwuneben. adre me ar vicodi, ras hqvia uxeSi sityva da
yvirili, axla ki yvelaferi unda avitano. me es ar SemiZlia. fiqradac ar
momdis daTmobaze wavide. me maT vaCveneb, rom ane franki is aRar aris, rac
guSin iyo! SeiZleba Tavad mixvdnen amas da ena gaaCeron. aRsazrdelebi TviTon
arian da ara me. maZrwunebs amgvari usaqcieloba da sibriyve (qalbatoni van
daanisa), magram male amasac SeveCvevi da maSin ki, icocxle, vetyvi Cems
saTqmels. nuTu me marTla ise uzrdeli, cnobismoyvare, abezari, briyvi da
zarmaci var, rogorc `zemourebi~ amtkiceben? me kargad vici, rom bevri nakli
da susti mxare gamaCnia, magram `zemourebi~ mainc usaSvelod aWarbeben.
rom icode, kiwi, rogor miduRs SigniT yvelaferi ganuwyveteli lanZRvaginebisagan, magram rodisme Cemi boRma gadmoinTxeva.
SeiZleba Tavi mogabezre, magram mainc unda gadmogce erTi saintereso
saubari, romelic sufraze gaabes. sityva Camovarda pimis (mamis saalerso
saxelia) did Tavmdablobaze. es imdenad naTelia, rom yvelaze briyvi adamianic
ver uaryofs. uecrad qalbatonma van daanma, romelsac yvelaferi Tavis Tavze
gadaaqvs, ganacxada: mec Tavmdabali adamiani var, Cems qmarze bevrad
Tavmdabalio! baton van daans undoda Seerbilebina misi SeniSvna da Zlier
wynarad Tqva:
me arc minda zedmetad Tavmdabali viyo, radgan Tamami adamianebi met
warmatebas aRweven cxovrebaSi.
mere ki me momibrunda: nu iqnebi zedmetad Tavmdabali, ana, da
gacilebiT met warmatebas miaRwev.
dedam baton van daans dauWira mxari, magram qalbaton van daans xom unda
daesxa cecxlze navTi. amjerad me aRaraferi miTxra da Cems mSoblebs
miubrunda.
rogor eqceviT anas, amgvari araferi minaxavs. Cven ase ar gvzrdidnen.
aseT rames, garda Tqveni Tanamedrove ojaxisa, axlac versad SexvdebiT.
mxedvelobaSi hqonda dedaCemis Sexedulebebi aRzrdaze, razedac xSirad
daobdnen. qalbatoni van daani WarxaliviT gawiTlda. roca moTminebidan
gamodixar, advilad marcxdebi.
dedas, rogorc yovelTvis, undoda bolo moeRo kamaTisaTvis da mSvidad
Tqva: qalbatono van daan, mec im azrisa var, rom zedmeti Tavmdabloba ar
varga. Cemi qmari, margo da peteri zedmetad Tavmdabalni arian. marTalia
Tavmdabloba arc Cven gvaklia, magram Tqven, Tqveni qmari, me da ana Tavs aravis
davaCagvrinebT!
me Zalze Tavmdabali adamiani gaxlavarT, qalbatono frank! rogor
SegiZliaT amis uaryofa?
deda: me ar miTqvams, rom sruliad ar gagaCniaT Tavmdabloba, magram
ar SeiZleba iTqvas, rom zedmetad Tavmdabali brZandebiT.
qalbatoni van daani: minda vicode, rodis maklda Tavmdabloba. me rom
aq Cems Tavze ar mezruna, albaT, SimSiliT movkvdebodi. me swored iseTive
Tavmdabali var, rogorc Tqveni qmari!
am briyvulma Tavisqebam deda gulianad gaacina, `sabralo~ qalbatoni
vani daani ki ise gajavrda, rom gaCereba veRar SeZlo da sul laparakobda.
bolos sakuTarma mWevrmetyvelebam daabnia, saTqmeli veRar moaTava,
Seuracxyofili wamodga da wasvla daapira. uecrad me gadmomxeda. samwuxarod,
roca igi wasasvlelad Sebrunda, me TanagrZnobiT da ironiulad Tavi gavaqnie,
ufro Cemda uneburad, vidre ganzrax. igi ukanve Semotrialda da msuqani, beberi

meTevzis coliviT sazizRrad da uxeSad ayvirda. saintereso sanaxavi iyo. xatva

rom SemeZlos, swored am saxiT ukvdavvyofdi am Cia, sasacilo models. erTi
ram SemiZlia giTxra: Tu ginda adamiani gaicno, erTxel mainc unda waeCxubo,
mxolod amis Semdeg SeZleb mis Sefasebas.
ana
samSabaTi, 29 seqtemberi, 1942
Zvirfaso kiwi!
CvenTan yovelTvis xdeba raRac iseTi, risi moyolac Rirs. aq Cven abazana
ara gvaqvs da varclSi vbanaobT. qvemoT kontoraSi (ase veZaxi pirvel sarTuls)
Tbili wyali modis da Cven Svidive, rigrigobiT CavdivarT dabla. radgan
yvelas sxvadasxva xasiaTi gvaqvs, erTi ufro morcxvia, vidre meore, amitom
sabanao adgils yvela Tavisi gemovnebis mixedviT irCevs. peteri banaobs
samzareuloSi, Tumca mas minis kari aqvs. banaobis win yvelas afrTxilebs da
sTxovs, naxevari saaTis ganmavlobaSi karebTan nu gaivliTo. mamamisi zeviT
banaobs, sakuTar oTaxSi; oRond myudrod moewyos da Tbili wylis zeviT atana
ar ezareba. qalbaton van daans aqamde ar ubanavia. igi jer sabanaod
moxerxebul adgils eZebs. mama kabinetSi ibans tans, deda samzareuloSi,
Rumels amofarebuli. me da margom didi kontora varCieT da saabazanod
vaqcieT. yovel SabaTs, nasadilevs, fardebs CamovuSvebT da naxevrad bnel
oTaxSi vbanaobT. erT-erTi Cvengani banaobs, meore ki fardebs Soris darCenili
WuWrutanidan gareT iyureba da erToba gamvlelTa sasacilo manWva-grexiT.
magram gasuli kviridan es sabanao oTaxi aRar momwons da ufro
komfortabelur adgils veZeb. peters kargi azri mouvida: winadadeba momca Cemi
sabanao mowyobilobiT gadavbargebuliyavi did sapirfareSoSi, romelic
kontoras ekuTvnis. sapirfareSoSi marto viqnebi, CavrTav sinaTles, davketav
karebs da wyals sxvis dauxmareblad gadavaqcev. dRes sazeimod gavxseni axali
`saabazano~ da Zalze kmayofili davrCi.
guSin saxlSi wyalsadenis ostati movida. qveda derefanSi unda SeefuTa
milebi, romlebic Cvens wyalsadens da sapirfareSos uerTdeba. es aucileblad
unda gagvekeTebina, rom milebi ar gayinuliyo Tu Zalian civi zamTari
dadgeboda. am kacis stumroba CvenTvis arc ise sasiamovno iyo, radgan verc
wyals viRebdiT da verc sapirfareSoTi vsargeblobdiT. iqneb amis Txroba
sasiamovno araa, magram mainc unda giamboT, ra movigoneT, gansacdeli rom
Tavidan agvecdina. me ara var imdenad morcxvi, rom aseT rameze laparaki
miWirdes. me da mamam winaswar vizruneT da yoveli SemTxvevisaTvis qilebi
movimarageT. axla gamogvadga, mxolod esaa, rom mTeli dRe oTaxis kuTxeSi
gvedga. magram es kidev araferi, gacilebiT Znelia mTeli dRe Cumad, xmis
amouReblad jdoma, gansakuTrebiT iseTi enatartalasaTvis, rogoric me var.
Cven xom isedac mxolod CurCuliT vlaparakobT. magram Cumad, gaunZrevlad
jdoma TiTqmis autanelia. sajdomi gamibrtyelda, ise momeTela, rom sami dRe
mtkioda.
saRamos vivarjiSeT. aman gviSvela!
ana
xuTSabaTi, 1 oqtomberi, 1942
Zvirfaso kiwi!
guSin usazRvro SiSi ganvicade. rva saaTze zari darekes da me yvelaze
saSineli ram warmovidgine Sen ici, razedac vlaparakob. yvela marwmunebda,
zari quCaSi moxetiale biWebma darekeso da me nel-nela davmSviddi.
dReebi duned miizlazneba. dabla, samzareuloSi muSaobs farmacevti,
batoni levini, romelic firmisaTvis qimiur cdebs atarebs. es kaci mTeli
saxlis ganlagebas icnobs da zogjer gveSinia, zeviT, yofil laboratoriaSi
amosvla ar moisurvos. Cven Zalze Cumad varT. vin ifiqrebda sami Tvis winaT,
rom mousvenari ane saaTobiT ijdeboda erT adgilas da xmas ar gaiRebda.

29-Si qalbaton van daanis dabadebis dRe aRvniSneT. didi zeimi ar

mogviwyvia. mivarTviT yvavilebi, umniSvnelo saCuqrebi da sadilad sagangebo
kerZi. qmarma wiTeli mixakebi uZRvna ojaxuri tradiciaa. marTla, minda
raRac giTxra qalbaton van daanze. mudam imis cdaSia, rom mamaCems gaearSiyos
da me es saSinlad mabrazebs. rogorc ki SesaZlebloba miecema, an loyaze
moucacunebs xels, an Tavze gadausvams. siamovnebiT aCens Tavis `lamaz~ fexebs,
enamaxvilobs, erTi sityviT, yvelafers akeTebs imisaTvis, rom pimis yuradReba
miiqcios. magram pims igi arc lamaz qalad miaCnia da arc sasiamovno adamianad.
misi kurkuri sruliad ar aRelvebs. me veWvianob, ubralod ver vitan aseT
rames. amas winaT pirSi vuTxari: `me mgonia, deda, Tqvens qmars ar ekeklucebameTqi~.
peteri zogjer Zalian sasaciloa. orives gviyvars gasarTobad
tansacmlis gamocvla da amiT Tavs viqcevT. amjerad dedamisis viwro kaba
Caecva, Tavze ki qalis qudi Camoefxata. me misi kostiumiT gamovcxaddi da
misive qudi davixure. ufrosebi siciliT ixocebodnen da Cvenc aranakleb
vimxiaruleT.
elim me da margos maRaziaSi qvedatani gviyida. qsovili metismetad
uxarisxo da Zviria. samagierod Zalze sasiamovno rame gvelis. elim margo, me
da peteri stenografiis dauswrebel kursebze Cagvwera. momaval wels
SesaniSnavi stenografistebi viqnebiT. urigo rodia aseTi `kriptografiis~
codna!
ana
SabaTi, 3 oqtomberi, 1942
Zvirfaso kiwi!
guSin isev saSineli Setakeba moxda. dedam mamas mTeli Cemi codvebi
gadauSala da Tanac Zalze gaazviada. deda tiroda, cxadia, mec vRrialebdi.
saSinlad amtkivda Tavi. me mamikos gamovucxade, rom yvelaze metad miyvars.
pimma mipasuxa, momavalSi yvelaferi Seicvlebao, magram me es ar mjera. dedas
rom mSvidad velaparako, Tavs Zala unda davatano. mama moiTxovs dedas
movuaro, roca Tavs cudad grZnobs, magram araferi gamomdis.
mondomebiT vswavlob franguls da vkiTxulob `La belle Nivernaise~.1 (1
`mSvenieri nivernezeli qali~, alfons dodes romani.)
ana
paraskevi, 9 oqtomberi, 1942
Zvirfaso kiwi!
dRes bevri usiamo da samwuxaro ambavi gavige. bevri Cveni nacnobi da
megobari ebraeli daapatimres, gestapo maT ar eloliaveba. dapatimrebulebs
saqonlis gadasazid vagonebSi yrian da ebraelTa sakoncentracio banakSi,
vesterborkSi mihyavT. saSineli adgilia. uamravi xalxia Tavmoyrili, arc
dabanis saSualeba aqvT da arc fexsadgilebi hyofniT. amboben, banakebSi teva
araa da kacebs, qalebs da bavSvebs erTad sZinavTo. gaqceva SeuZlebelia.
patimrebs advilad scnoben gadaparsuli TaviT Tu wminda ebrauli garegnobiT.
Tuki holandiaSi ase cudadaa saqme, ra saSineleba eliT maT iq, sadac
mierekebian. inglisis radio iuwyeba, rom maT gazis kamerebSi amoaxrCoben. iqneb
es mospobis yvelaze swrafi saSualebaa. mipi saSinel ambebs gviambobs da
TviTonac Zalze Relavs. amas winaT misi saxlis win koWli dedaberi
Camomjdara. dedaberi gestapos manqanas ucdida, romelic gzadagza krefda
xalxs. moxuci qali SiSisagan caxcaxebda.
sazenito qvemexebi quxda, proJeqtorebis Suqi sibneles apobda, inglisis
TviTmfrinavebis gugunis gamoZaxili saxlidan saxls exeTqeboda. mipma ver
gabeda dedabris saxlSi Seyvana. germanelebi amis gamo mkacrad sjian yvelas.
elic mdumare da mowyenili dadis. misi megobari germaniaSi gagzavnes
iZulebiTi begaris mosaxdelad. eSinia bombardirebis dros ar daiRupos.
ingliseli mfrinavebi milionobiT kilogram yumbarebs yrian. me Zalian

uadgilod da uxeSad mimaCnia amgvari oxunjoba: oh, mTeli milioni mas xom
ar moxvdeba, anda: erTi yumbarac ikmarebs. marto dirki xom araa am dReSi,
cxadia, ara. yoveldRe axalgazrdebs vagonebSi yrian da germaniaSi agzavnian
iZulebiT samuSaoze. zogi gzidan garbis, zogi droze imaleba, magram aseTebi
Zalze cotaa.
Cemi sevdiani simRera jer ar damTavrebula. gagigonia raime mZevlebis
Sesaxeb. germanelebma daxvewili wameba moigones. ufro saSineli, vidre sxva
yvelaferi. udanaSaulo moqalaqeebs ganurCevlad apatimreben da cixeebSi
amwyvdeven. xolo roca sadme `sabotaJs~ aRmoaCenen da damnaSaves ver ipovian,
mZevlad wayvanilTa nawils xvreten. Semdeg amas gazeTebSi aqveyneben da
mosaxleobas afrTxileben. ra xalxia es germanelebi! odesRac mec maT
vekuTvnodi, Tumca didi xani gavida mas Semdeg, rac hitlerma kanongareSe
gamogvacxada. qveynad ar arsebobs ufro didi mtroba, vidre amgvar
germanelebsa da ebraelebs Sorisaa Camovardnili.
ana
paraskevi, 16 oqtomberi, 1942
Zvirfaso kiwi!
uamravi saqme gamiCnda, axlaxan vTargmne erTi Tavi `La belle Nivernaise~-dan
da amoviwere yvela ucnobi sityva. Semdeg uZnelesi ariTmetikuli amocana
gadavwyvite, bolos daviswavle sami gverdi frangulad. amocanebis gadawyveta
ar miyvars da davalebas xSirad gverdze gadavdeb xolme. amocanebis gadawyveta
mamasac uWirs; zogjer me ukeTesad viyvan, magram mainc gviWirs da
dasaxmareblad margos veZaxiT. stenografiaSi yvelas gavaswari. guSin
davamTavre `dampyroblebis~ kiTxva, kargi wignia, magram ioop ter heuls ar
Seedreba.
SenTvis bevrjer miTqvams, rom cisi fon maqsveldi SesaniSnavad wers.
momavalSi Cemma Svilebma aucileblad unda waikiTxon yvela misi wigni. mamam
kerneris piesebi momca wasakiTxad: `bremeneli biZaSvili~, `guvernanti qali~ da
`mwvane domino~. kargi mweralia.
me, deda da margo isev SexmatkbilebiT vcxovrobT da es yvelafers
jobia. guSin saRamos margo CemTan iwva. Zalze viwrod viyaviT, magram
araCveulebriv myudroebas vgrZnobdiT. margom mkiTxa: SeiZleba Seni dRiuri
wavikiTxoo mxolod zogi adgili, vupasuxe me. Semdeg misi dRiuri
movikiTxe. dampirda wagakiTxebo. vlaparakobdiT momavalze; vkiTxe, ra ginda
gamoxvide-meTqi. am ambavs igi saidumlod inaxavs. me yuri movkari, TiTqos
maswavleblobas apirebs. da me mgoni, asec unda iyos. Tumca amden
cnobismoyvareobas ar unda viCende.
am diliT peteri sakuTari sawolidan wamovagde da Tavad wamovweqi.
peteri gacecxlda, magram me misTvis yuradReba ar mimiqcevia. kacma rom Tqvas,
ufro Tavazianad unda mepyrobodes, radgan guSin saRamos vaSli vaCuqe.
margos vkiTxe: rogor ggonia, gonji var? sasacilod gamoiyurebi,
magram lamazi Tvalebi gaqvso, mipasuxa man. gaurkveveli pasuxia, Sen rogor
fiqrob?
naxvamdis!
ana
samSabaTi, 20 oqtomberi, 1942
Zvirfaso kiwi!
Tumca mas Semdeg ori saaTi gavida, magram iseTi SiSi ganvicade, rom
xelebi axlac mikankalebs. saxlSi hkidia xuTi cecxlmqrobi `minimaqsi~. aravis
gaufrTxilebivarT, rom maT asavsebad movidodnen. amitom sanam winkaridan
CaquCis xma ar momesma, gansakuTrebul sifrTxiles ar vicavdi. megona durgali
movida da gavafrTxile eli, romelic CvenTan sadilobda, rom axla Zirs
Casvla ar SeiZleba. me da mama kars ukan CavsafrdiT da yurs vugdebdiT, rodis
morCeboda is kaci muSaobas da wavidoda. meoTxedi saaTis Semdeg man iaraRi

karadaze dado da Cvens karze daakakuna. oriveni gavfiTrdiT, nuTu rame SeniSna
da gadawyvita Seamowmos, ra imaleba kars ukan. mgoni asec iyo, radgan kakuni,
karis gamoweva, jajguri da biZgebi ar wydeboda. kinaRam guli Semiwuxda imis
gafiqrebaze, rom Cvens mSvenier TavSesafars viRac gadamTieli aRmoaCens. ase
megona, mTeli saukune gavida, sanam baton koophoisis xma ar gavigone: gaaReT,
me var. kari maSinve gavaReT. Turme, saketi, romliTac kari Signidan iketeboda
da romlis gaReba garedanac SeeZlo saidumloebagandobils, raRacas
gamosdeboda, amitom droze ver gagvafrTxiles, rom xelosani movidoda. roca
muSa wavida, koophoisma elis gamoZaxeba gadawyvita, magram mbrunavi kari ver
gaaRo da xmauri atexa. gulidan uzarmazari tvirTi momwyda. kaci, romelic
CvenTan unda Semosuliyo, Cems warmodgenaSi swrafad izrdeboda da bolos
uZlevel goliaTad iqca. axla ki SegviZlia vTqvaT, rom bedma ar gvimtyuna,
yvelaferi keTilad damTavrda!
orSabaTs bevri vimxiaruleT. mipma da henkma CvenTan gaaTies Rame. me da
margo ded-mamasTan `gadavsaxldiT~, col-qmars ki Cveni oTaxi davuTmeT.
SesaniSnavad visadileT. Tumca am dRes uxifaTod mainc ar Cauvlia. mamis
magidis lampaSi mokle CarTva moxda da erTbaSad bnelSi aRmovCndiT.
eleqtromricxveli, romelSic mcveli ixraxneba, sadRac sawyobis boloSi
hkidia da arc ise sasiamovnoa bnelSi xelis faTuri, magram bedma gagviRima da
dazianebuli xazi aT wuTSi SeakeTes. axla ukve SeiZleboda sanTlebisagan
mowyobili iluminaciis Caqroba. diliT adre avdeqiT. henki cxris naxevarze
unda wasuliyo da gvindoda myudrod gvesauzma. gareT saSinlad wvimda.
mixaroda, rom aseT amindSi quCaSi gasvla ar mixdeboda. me da mamam yvelaferi
mivalageT da franguli zmnebis dazepirebas Sevudeqi. mere vkiTxulobdi
SesaniSnav wigns `tyeebi marad mRerian~. mwyins, rom male vamTavreb.
Semdeg kviras eli CvenTan gaaTevs Rames!
ana
xuTSabaTi, 29 oqtomberi, 1942
Zvirfaso kiwi!
ver visveneb. mama avadaa. didi sicxe aqvs da raRacam gamoayara, rogorc
wiTelam icis. warmoidgine, eqimis gamoZaxebac ki ar SegviZlia. deda uvlis.
bevri ofli adenina. iqneb sicxem dauwios.
diliT mipma gviambo, rom van daanebis bina germanelebs gauZarcvavT.
qalbaton van daanisaTvis araferi gviTqvams. bolo dros igi Zalze nervulobs
da Cven sruliad ar gvainteresebs saaTobiT visminoT, ra saucxoo WurWeli da
Zvirfasi aveji darCa saxlSi. Cvenc xom yvelaferi Zvirfasi bedis anabara
mivatoveT. Civili am saqmeSi verafers gviSvelis.
am bolo dros mec momces ufleba mozrdilTaTvis gankuTvnili zogierTi
wigni wavikiTxo. vkiTxulob niko van suxtelenis `evas siymawviles~. kacma rom
Tqvas, me ver vxedav did gansxvavebas am wignsa da gogonebis sakiTxav wignebs
Soris. mxolod esaa, rom am wignSi zogjer qalebi sakuTari sxeuliT vaWroben
da ucxo mamakacebisagan bevr fuls iReben. me, albaT, sircxviliT movkvdebi,
ucxo mamakacTan marto rom davrCe. Semdeg weria, evas `avadmyofoba~ daewyoo.
mec Zalian minda damewyos, radgan vici, raoden mniSvnelovania es. mamam
karadidan goeTesa da Sileris dramebi gadmoiRo da apirebs saRamoobiT
xmamaRla gvikiTxos yvelas. daviwyeT `don karlosiT~. dedam mamis magaliTs
mibaZa da locvani maCuqa. wigni zrdilobis gamo gadavikiTxe. TiTqos momwons
kidec, magram arafers maZlevs. ratom cdilobs deda iZulebiT gamxados
morwmune?
xval pirvelad gavaCaRebT Rumels. albaT, gabolil oTaxSi mogviwevs
jdoma. didi xania sakvamuri ar gauwmendiaT.
ana
SabaTi, 7 noemberi, 1942
Zvirfaso kiwi!

deda Zalze nervulobs da es CemTvis saxifaTo meCeCia. nuTu SemTxveviT

xdeba, rom Cemi mSoblebi arasodes ar uwyrebian margos da yovelTvis mxolod
me mxvdeba? magaliTad, guSin saRamos margo lamazad ilustrirebul wigns
kiTxulobda. mere zeviT avida, wigni ki gverdze gadado, raTa mobrunebuls
kiTxva ganegrZo. radgan saqme araferi mqonda, wigni aviRe da suraTebs
vaTvalierebdi. margo dabrunda. roca dainaxa, `misi~ wigni xelSi meWira, Subli
Seikra da wignis warTmeva daapira. me ki Zalian mindoda bolomde
dameTvalierebina. margo gabrazda. dedam miTxra: wigns margo kiTxulobs da
axlave daubruneo.
oTaxSi mama Semovida. Tumca man araferi icoda, magram gadawyvita, rom
margos usamarTlod Cagraven da miTxra: rodisme margoc wagarTmevs wigns
da vnaxoT, rogor moiqcevio!
me Tavi aRar gamomidvia. wigni davde da oTaxidan gavedi. maT egonaT,
guli momivida, magram me arc guli momsvlia da arc Seuracxyofilad migrZvnia
Tavi. mxolod sevda Semomawva gulze.
mama usamarTlod moiqca, roca arc ikiTxa, raSia saqme da ganaCeni
gamoitana. mSoblebi rom ar Careuliyvnen da margosTvis ar daeWiraT mxari, me
ufro male davubrunebdi wigns. CemTvis gasagebia, rom deda margos gamoeqomaga,
isini mudam erTmaneTs uWeren mxars. me ise SeveCvie am ambavs, rom gulgrilad
aRviqvam dedis tuqsvas da margos mouTmenlobas. me isini imitom miyvars, rom
deda da margo arian. rac Seexeba mamas, masTan sul sxvagvari
damokidebuleba maqvs. roca mama margos upiratesobas aniWebs, aqebs, yvelafers
uwonebs da alersianad eqceva, SigniT raRac mRrRnis, radgan mama CemTvis
yvelaferia. mamaa Cemi naTeli ideali da yvelaze metad miyvars amqveynad. magram
mamas ar esmis, rom margos sul sxvanairad eqceva, vidre me. margo misTvis
yvelaze Wkviani, yvelaze lamazi da yvelaze ukeTesia, magram mec xom maqvs
ufleba seriozuli damokidebuleba moviTxovo. ojaxis azriT, me jambazi da
uqnara var, rac ormag usiamovnebas mayenebs: jer erTi, mudam sayvedurebiT
mavseben, meorec, sakuTar Tavs ver verevi. me aRarc zerele alersi
makmayofilebs da aRarc egreT wodebuli `seriozuli saubari~; me raRac iseTs
moveli mamisagan, risi mocemac mas ar SeuZlia. ara, me ar veWvianob margoze,
arc misi silamaze mWirdeba da arc misi Wkua. me mxolod erT rameze vocnebob:
namdvilad, guliT vuyvarde mamas da ara rogorc sakuTari Svili, aramed
rogorc adamiani, vuyvarde me, ana.
mamas imitom veWidebi ase, rom mxolod igi minarCunebs ojaxisadmi
siyvaruls. mamas ar esmis, rom CemTvis xandaxan aucilebelia dedaze laparaki
da azris gamoTqma. mas ar surs, dedis uaryofiT mxareebs Seexos. am Temaze
yovelgvar saubars gaurbis. me ki dedis damokidebuleba mZime tvirTad mawevs.
xSirad Tavs ver vikaveb da pirSi veubnebi, ramdenad gulgrili, damcinavi da
mkacria, radgan marTlac ara var yovelTvis damnaSave.
saerTod, me da deda sruliad sxvadasxva adamianebi varT da amitom
mogvdis xSirad usiamovneba. me ar vmsjelob mis xasiaTze, aq msajulad ar
gamovdgebi, mxolod ise vuyureb, rogorc dedas. magram igi araa iseTi deda,
rogoric me mWirdeba. amitom me TviTon unda viyo Cemi deda. me maT sruliad
gamoveTiSe Sinaganad da Cemi gziT mivdivar. vin icis, romel napirs mivadgebi?
gonebaSi mesaxeba dedisa da qalis ideali, magram am qalsa da im adamians
Soris, visac dedas veZaxi, veraviTar msgavsebas ver vpoulob.
mudam vcdilob Tvali avarido dedis uaryofiT mxareebs, minda mxolod
kargze gavamaxvilo yuradReba da CemSi ganvaviTaro is, rac mas aklia. magram
yovelTvis rodi gamomdis ase. yvelaze cudi ki isaa, rom arc mamas da arc
dedas ar surT dainaxon, ra maklia cxovrebaSi da amis gamo Zalze nawyeni var
maTze. nuTu mSoblebs arasodes ar SeuZliaT samarTlianad moepyron sakuTar
Svilebs.
xandaxan vfiqrob: iqneb RmerTi mcdis? me TviTon unda mivide
srulyofamde, yovelgvari misabaZi magaliTisa da daxmarebis gareSe.
samagierod, momavalSi Zlieri da amtani viqnebi.

Cems garda vin waikiTxavs odesme am werilebs? vin damexmareba? o, rogor

mWirdeba daxmareba, da nugeSi. xSirad suliT vecemi da ver vaxerxeb viyo iseTi,
rogoric minda. me vici es da yoveldRe vcdilob daviwyo Tavidan, gamovsworde.
magram Zalze usamarTlod mepyrobian! erT dRes mozrdil adamianad
mTvlian da ufleba maqvs yvelaferi vicode, meore dRes ki Zveleburad
meqcevian: ane jer kidev briyvi batkania, hgonia, wignebidan bevri ram iswavla,
magram cxadia, jer araferi esmis. sinamdvileSi me arc ZuZumwovara bavSvi var
da arc ganebivrebuli Tojina, romliTac erTobian, Tumca jer ar SemiZlia amis
sityvebiT gamoTqma, magram me Cemi idealebi, azrebi da gegmebi maqvs. ah, ramdeni
eWvi mipyrobs saRamoobiT, roca marto var, an dRisiT, roca am gamomwyvdeul
adamianebs Sevyureb, romelTac saSinlad momabezres Tavi, radgan arc Cemi
esmiT da arc is, rac me mawuxebs. amitom bolos isev Cems dRiurs vubrundebi.
mudam amiT viwyeb da amiT vamTavreb. kiwi yvelafers iTmens da mec pirobas
vaZlev, rom yvelafers gavuZleb, davZlev Cems mwuxarebas da gzas gavikafav,
magram ra did siyvaruls momgvrida warmateba, rogor minda mosiyvarule
adamiani mxarSi amomidges, gamamxnevos, momealersos!
nu gamkicxav! gamige, rom zogjer SeiZleba mec damekargos moTmineba. ana
orSabaTi, 9 noemberi, 1942
Zvirfaso kiwi!
guSin peteris dabadebis dRe iyo, mSvenieri saCuqrebi miiRo, maT Soris
saintereso saTamaSo, eleqtrosamarTebeli da sanTebela. ara imitom, rom
mwevelia, aramed aseT saCuqars Tavisi Sno aqvs.
magram yvelaze saocari ram batonma van daanma gvacnoba: ingliselebma
tunisSi, kasablankaSi, alJirsa da oranSi desanti gadasxeso es dasasrulis
dasawyisia, Tqva yvelam, magram CerCilma, inglisis premierma, romelsac, albaT,
inglisSic xSirad smenia aseTi azri, Tavis gamosvlaSi ganacxada:
desantis gadasxma uaRresad didmniSvnelovani etapia, magram nuravin
fiqrobs, rom es dasasrulis dasawyisia, ufro swored es dasawyisis
dasasrulia.
didi gansxvavebaa, ara? magram optimizmisaTvis safuZveli mainc arsebobs.
germanelebma jerac ver aiRes ruseTis didi qalaqi, stalingradi, romelic
ager ukve sami Tvea, rac alyaSemortymulia. axla ki yoveldRiur ambebs
davubrundeT: roca Cvens TavSesafarze vlaparakobT, isic unda giTxra, Tu
rogor gvamarageben sursaTiT. Sen unda icode, rom `zemourebi~ namdvili
Rormucelebi arian. purs gvawvdis Zalze keTili mepure, koophoisis nacnobi.
cxadia, imdeni ara gvaqvs, ramdenic saxlSi gvqonda, magram mainc sakmarisia.
sasursaTo baraTebs CvenTvis yiduloben Sav bazarze. maTi fasi ganuwyvetliv
izrdeba. am pawia qaRaldis naglejSi adre 27 guldens vixdidiT, axla ki
ocdacamets.
saxlSi rom konservebis garda raime maragi gvqondes, viyideT 270
girvanqa cercvi da lobio, rac axla tomrebiT hkidia derefanSi mbrunav
karTan. simZimisagan tomrebi ramdenime adgilas gairRva da gadavwyviteT
zamTris maragi sxvenze agvetana. tomrebis gadazidva peters daavales. eqvsi
tomridan xuTi mSvidobianad gadaitana, magram rogorc ki meeqvses mohkida
xeli, qveda nakeri gairRva da kibeze yavisferi lobio wvimasaviT wamovida,
wvima ki ara, setyva iyo. Zirs darCenilebma ifiqres, Zveli saxli Tavze
gvengrevao. sabednierod, kontoraSi ucxo aravin iyo... peters Zalian SeeSinda,
magram roca daminaxa kibis qveda safexurze Tavze lobiogadayrili da
koWebamde lobioSi Cafluli, gamayruebeli xarxari morTo. daviwyeT lobios
akrefa, magram marcvlebi ise patara da ise srialaa, rom TiTebs Soris
gvisxlteba da RreWoebsa da xvrelebSi cviva. axla, roca vinme am kibeze adis,
yovelTvis poulobs lobios da qalbaton van daans abarebs.
kinaRam damaviwyda umTavresi: mama gamojansaRda.
ana

P. S. es wuTia radiom gamoacxada, rom alJiri aiRes. maroko, kasablanka

da oranic ukve ramdenime dRea ingliselebis xelSia. male tunissac aiReben.
samSabaTi, 10 noemberi, 1942
Zvirfaso kiwi!
ambavi, romelic axla unda gacnobo, epoqaluri mniSvnelobisaa. gvinda
merve `iatakqveSeli~ SemovixiznoT. xSirad gvifiqria, rom aq erTi kacisaTvis
adgilic ikmarebs da sakvebic. Cven mxolod imitom vikavebdiT Tavs, rom
kraleris da koophiosis zedmetad Sewuxebas veridebodiT. magram Cvenamde
ebraelTa gasaxlebasTan dakavSirebis saSineli ambebi aRwevda da mamam scada
gaego, ra azris iyvnen Cveni megobrebi. maT Zalian mogviwones ganzraxva: gind
Svidni yofilxarT, gind rvani, safrTxe igivea, daaskvnes maT sruliad
marTebulad. raki saqme aqamde mivida, daviwyeT Cvens nacnobebs Soris iseTi
martoxela kacis Zebna, romelic Cveni `iatakqveSa~ ojaxisaTvis Sesaferisi
aRmoCndeboda. aseTi kacis povna Zneli ar iyo. mas Semdeg, rac mamam uaryo van
daanebis yvela winadadeba Semogvexiznebina romelime maTi naTesavi, arCevani
xvda erT-erT Cvens nacnob kbilis eqims, albert dusels, romlis coli
sazRvargareT wavida. amboben, sasiamovno kaciao, Tanac Cven da van daanebi
keTilad varT misdami ganwyobili. mipi am kacs kargad icnobs da yvelafers
gaakeTebs. albert duseli margos adgils daiWers Cems oTaxSi, margo ki Tavisi
dasakeci sawoliT mSoblebTan gadabargda.
ana
xuTSabaTi, 12 noemberi, 1942
Zvirfaso kiwi!
duseli sixaruliT cas ewia, roca mipma uTxra, rom misTvis TavSesafari
eguleba. urCia, rac SeiZleba male gadmosuliyo CvenTan, umjobesia zego.
duseli yoymanobda. jer erTi, Tavisi karToteka wesrigSi unda moeyvana, meorec,
ori pacienti mieRo da yovelgvari angariSebi gaesworebina. yovelive es am
diliT mipma gviambo. Cveni azriT, ajobebda, saqme ar gaeWianurebina. yovelgvari
samzadisi axsna-ganmartebas moiTxovs, Cven ki gverCia, aravis araferi scodnoda.
mipma kidev erTxel urCia dusels SabaTs gadmosuliyo, magram man uari
ganacxada da mxolod orSabaTs gadmova. sasaciloa, rom igi maSinve ar moeWida
amgvar SesaZleblobas. xom SeiZleba SemTxveviT Seipyron quCaSi da maSin verc
karTotekas moiyvans wesrigSi, verc angariSs gaasworebs da verc pacientebs
miiRebs. Cemi azriT, mamam tyuilad dauTmo! jerjerobiT axali sxva araferia.
ana
samSabaTi, 17 noemberi, 1942
Zvirfaso kiwi!
duseli CvenTanaa. yvelaferi keTilad damTavrda. mipma igi mTavar
fostasTan daibara. duseli zustad daniSnul droze movida. koophoisi,
romelic mas saxiT icnobda, miuaxlovda da uTxra, TiTqos is kaci, romelmac
igi daibara, mogvianebiT mova da manamde mipTan, kontoraSi daicadeTo.
koophoisi tramvaiT gamoemgzavra, duseli ki fexiT wamovida da Tormetis
naxevarze ukve kontoraSi iyo. yviTeli varskvlavi rom ar daenaxaT, duselma
palto gaixada, damlageblis wasvlamde koophoisis kabinetSi icdida. cxadia,
ar icoda, ra mizeziT alodinebdnen. bolos mipma kabinetSi TaTbiris dawyeba
moimizeza da zemo sarTulSi amoiyvana. enaCavardnili duselis win mbrunavi
kari gaiRo da oriveni SeumCnevlad amovidnen CvenTan.
yvelam zeviT, van daanebTan, moviyareT Tavi. axalmosuls yava da koniaki
davaxvedreT. mipma igi Cvens oTaxSi Semoiyvana. duselma maSinve icno Cveni
aveji, magram azradac ar mosvlia, rom Cvenc aqa varT. mipma yvelaferi uambo.
magram man mainc veraferi gaigo. bolos gaognebuli zemoT amoiyvana. duseli
skamze daeca, rigrigobiT yvelas dagvaSterda, da mainc sakuTar Tvalebs ar
ujerebda. rogorc iqna, xma amoiRo, borZikiT aluRluRda: ki magram... ara...

gana Tqven belgiaSi ara xarT? nuTu oficeri ar Camovida? manqana? nuTu gaqceva
ver moaxerxeT?..
maSin vuambeT, rom zRapari oficrisa da manqanis Sesaxeb TviTonve
gavavrceleT xalxisa da gansakuTrebiT germanelebis mosatyueblad, cxadia, im
SemTxvevisaTvis, Tu Zebnas dagviwyebdnen. duseli aseTma gamWriaxobam daamunja,
xolo roca Cveni moxdenili, eSmakurad mowyobili TavSesafari vaCveneT,
gaocebisagan aRar iyo. yvelam erTad visadileT, Semdeg duselma cota daisvena,
mere Cai davlieT, da bolos igi Tavisi avla-didebis amolagebas Seudga.
duseli male gaSinaurda, gansakuTrebiT mas Semdeg, rac `iatakqveSelTa~
Sinaganawess gaecno (van daanma Seadgina).
TavSesafris prospeqti da gzis maCvenebeli
ebraelTa da maT msgavsTa droebiTi sacxovrebeli dawesebulebis
Sinaganawesi.
Riaa mTeli wlis ganmavlobaSi. moxdenili, wynari, utyeo adgili
amsterdamis centrSi. transporti: tramvai #17 da 13, avtomobili da
velosipedi, xolo visac germanelebma yovelgvari saxis transportiT
sargebloba aukrZales, fexiTac moaRwevs.
binis qira. ufaso.
cximgaclili dieturi sakvebi.
gamdinare wyali: saabazanoSi (abazana ar dgas) da, samwuxarod, zogierT
kedelzec.
mozrdili sawyobi yovelgvari saqonlis Sesanaxad.
sakuTari radiosadguri: uSualo kavSiri londonTan, niu-iorkTan, telavivTan da mraval sxva sadgurTan. radiomimRebi mdgmurebis gankargulebaSia
saRamos 6 saaTidan.
dasvenebis saaTebi: Ramis aTi saaTidan dilis rvis naxevramde, kviraobiT
dilis aT saaTamde. TavSesafris mmarTvelobis gankargulebiT gansakuTrebul
pirobebSi dasvenebis saaTebi SeiZleba dawesdes dRisiTac. sayovelTao
uSiSroebis uzrunvelsayofad miTiTeba zustad unda Sesruldes!..
ardadegebi: jerjerobiT gauqmebulia.
salaparako ena: yvela kulturuli ena... oRond CurCuliT.
tanvarjiSi: yoveldRe.
mecadineoba: stenografia, kviraSi erTi saaTi (weriTi samuSao),
inglisuri, franguli, maTematika da istoria dRis yovel dros.
sakvebis miRebis dro: sauzme yoveldRe 9 saaTze, kvira dReebisa da
dResaswaulebis gamoklebiT.
sadili 115-dan 1 45 saaTamde.
vaxSami civi an cxeli, sxvadasxva dros. damokidebulia ukanaskneli
cnobebis gadmocemaze.
valdebulebani sursaTiT mommaragebeli komisiis winaSe: mudam mzad unda
viyoT kontoris saqmis warmoebaSi dasaxmareblad.
tanis dabana: `abazana~ yovel kvira dRes dilis 9 saaTidan yvela
mobinadris gankargulebaSia: tanis dabana SeiZleba sapirfareSoSi,
samzareuloSi, kabinetSi da kontoraSi visac rogor urCevnia.
alkoholiani sasmelebi nebadarTulia mxolod eqimis rCeviT.
ana
xuTSabaTi, 19 noemberi, 1942
Zvirfaso kiwi!
rogorc velodiT, duseli marTla Zalze sasiamovno adamiani aRmoCnda.
Tumca gulaxdilad rom giTxra, arc ise sasiamovnoa, roca ucxo kaci Sens
oTaxSi cxovrobs da yvelafers xels hkidebs, magram keTili saqmisaTvis zogi

ram unda daTmo. mTavaria, adamians uSvelo, yvelaferi danarCeni wvrilmania,

ambobs mama da marTalicaa.
duselma pirvelsave dRes dawvrilebiT gamomkiTxa yvelaferi, magaliTad,
ra drosaa kontoraSi damlagebeli qali, rodis SeiZleba sapirfareSoTi
sargebloba, sad jobia banaoba. Sen, albaT, gecineba, kiwi, magram TavSesafarSi
yovelive amas didi mniSvneloba aqvs. qveviT xSiradaa iseTi xalxi, romelTac
Cveni saidumlo ar gavandeT da amitom, roca kontoraSi ucxo adamiania,
gansakuTrebuli siCume unda davicvaT. Cven viciT, ra dros ra xdeba.
dusels yvelaferi mSvenivrad avuxseni, magram gamakvirva misma
mousazreblobam. yvelafers or-orjer mekiTxeboda da mainc ver imaxsovrebda,
albaT, gaocebisagan jerac ver gamorkveula, magram TandaTan esec mogvardeba.
sxva mxriv yvelaferi rigzea.
duselma bevri ram gviambo gare samyaroze, romelsac karga xania
movwydiT. Zalze samwuxaro ambavi gvamcno. uamravi nacnobi da megobari sadRac
garekes da axla sasowarkveTilni saSinel dasasruls elian. yovel saRamos
quCebSi mwvane da nacrisferi samxedro manqanebi dahqrian. germaneli `eseselebi~
mwvane manqanebSi sxedan. holandiis faSisturi policia ki SavSi da ebraelebs
daeZeben. Tu sadme erTi kaci aRmoaCines, mTel ojaxs apatimreben. yvela karze
akakuneben da Tu veravin ipoves, meore saxls miadgebian. zogjer Tan daaqvT sia
da vinc siaSia `aRniSnuli~, mihyavT. aravis ar ascdeba es xvedri, Tu droze ar
daimala. zogierTs gamosasyids axdevineben. mSvenivrad ician, ra qonebis
patronia maTi msxverpli.
yovelive es ise gamoiyureba, rogorc Zvel droSi monebze nadiroba.
xSirad aseTi suraTi midgas Tvalwin: ramdenime sazareli arseba cemiTa da
wamebiT mierekeba wesier udanaSaulo adamianebs, romelTac atirebuli bavSvebi
mihyavT, mierekebian manamde, sanam muxlebi ar moekecebaT. aravis ar indoben, arc
moxucebs, arc ZuZuTa bavSvebs, arc fexmZime qalebs, arc avadmyofebs da arc
xeibrebs. yvela, yvela CauTreviaT am sasikvdilo ferxulSi.
Cven ki ra kargad, ra mSvidad movewyveT. mTeli es ubedureba odnavadac
ar Segvawuxebda, imaTi javri da SiSi rom ar gvklavdes, vinc CvenTvis
Zvirfasia, vinc Tavs ver uSvela.
xandaxan Cemi Tavi mejavreba. me aq Tbil loginSi vwevar, Cemi saukeTeso
megobrebi ki sadRac Ria cisqveS qarsa da wvimaSi saSinlad itanjebian da zogi
albaT daiRupa kidec. usazRvro SiSi mipyrobs, roca vigoneb imaT, visTanac
axlo urTierToba mqonda, da romlebic axla yvelaze sastik jalaTebs
Cauvardnen xelSi, jalaTebs, romelTa msgavsi istorias ar axsovs. da mxolod
imitom, rom ebraelebi arian!..
ana
paraskevi, 20 noemberi, 1942
Zvirfaso kiwi!
marTali giTxra, cota ar iyos, yvelani davibeniT. adre Cvenamde naklebad
aRwevda cnobebi ebraelebze, iqneb jobda kidec, rom ase dawvrilebiT ar
vicodiT yvelaferi. roca zogjer mipi gviyveboda raimes nacnobebis samwuxaro
bedze, deda da qalbatoni van daani mudam tirodnen da mipma gadawyvita,
aRaraferi eambna. magram dusels maSinve uamravi kiTxvebi daayares da imdeni
sazareli da barbarosuli ram gviambo, rom Zneli mosanelebelia. roca es
mogonebani gauferuldeba, nuTu isev SevZlebT sicilsa da udardelad
mxiarulebas? magram Tu samudamod davmwuxrdebiT da Cvens TavSesafars Wmunvis
savaned gadavaqcevT, verc sakuTar Tavs gamovadgebiT da verc gareT darCenilT.
rasac unda vakeTebde, Cemi fiqrebi mudam imaTTanaa, vinc waiyvanes. sakmarisia
uzrunvelad gavicino da maSinve SiSi mipyrobs, Cems Tavs vusayvedureb
mxiarulebas. magram nuTu mTeli dRe damwuxrebuli unda viyo? me ase ar
SemiZlia, mgoni uguneboba gamivlis.
am sadardebels Cemi piradi usiamovnebac erTvis. marTalia, im did
ubedurebasTan SedarebiT, razedac es wuTia gwerdi, piradi gancdebi sruliad

araferia, magram mainc minda giTxra, rom am bolo dros saocar martoobas
vgrZnob. CemSi sicariele damkvidrda. adre amaze ar vfiqrobdi, garToba da
megobrebi avsebdnen Cems fiqrebs, axla ki rTuli problemebi mawuxebs. gavige
isic, rom mamasac ki, romelic yvelaze Zalian miyvars, ar ZaluZs, mTeli Cemi
uwindeli samyaros magivroba gamiwios.
Sen albaT ggonia, rom Zalze umaduri var, ara, kiwi? zogjer iseTi
grZnoba maqvs, TiTqos didxans ver gavuZleb amgvar cxovrebas. gesmodes mTeli
es saSineleba, gawuxebdes sakuTari sadardebeli da amave dros yvelasTvis
xelwamosakravi iyo.
ana
SabaTi, 28 noemberi, 1942
Zvirfaso kiwi!
bevri eleqtroenergia davwviT da limiti gadavxarjeT. axla ukiduresi
momWirneoba gvmarTebs, Torem SeiZleba deni gamogviTiSon da 14 dRe
usinaTlod dagvtovon. oTxidan Tu xuTis naxevridan kiTxva aRar SegviZlia,
amitom sxvadasxva gasarTobs vigonebT da dros ase vklavT. veubnebiT erTmaneTs
gamocanebs, vvarjiSobT sibneleSi, vlaparakobT inglisurad an frangulad,
vmsjelobT wakiTxul wignebze, magram gaWianurebuli yvelaferi
mosabezrebelia. axla me axali gasarTobi vipove, savele binokliT mezoblebis
ganaTebul fanjrebSi viWvritebi. dRisiT erTi santimetriTac ki ar SeiZleba
fardis gadaweva, magram saRamos arc ise saxifaToa. adre ar megona mezoblebis
cxovreba Tu ase sainteresoa. zogs sadilobisas vakvirdebodi, erT ojaxSi
kinofilmi gauSves, mopirdapire saxlSi moxuci kbilis eqimi mSiSara dedabers
mkurnalobda.
marTla, kbilis eqimis gaxsenebaze! batoni duseli, romelzedac
ambobdnen, SesaniSnavad eqceva bavSvebs da Zalian uyvars patarebio,
dromoWmuli SexedulebebiT yofila savse da mudam zrdilobiani qcevisa da
TavdaWeris Sesaxeb qadagebs. rogorc cnobilia, maqvs saeWvo `bedniereba~ am
`didad pativcemul~ vaJbatonTan erT oTaxSi cxovrebisa da radgan Cveni
mozardi sameulidan me yvelaze uzrdelad mTvlian, mudam imis cdaSi var, rom
Tavidan avicilo dausrulebeli sayvedurebi da Wkuis darigeba, an Tavi
moviyruo. magram amas rogorme gavuZlebdi, es kaci rom aseTi `mabezRara~ ar
iyos da yovel wuTSi maincdamainc dedasTan ar garbodes saCivlelad. jer
kidev misi sayvedurebi ver mominelebia, am dros modis deda da cecxlze navTs
asxams, xolo Tu bedi gansakuTrebiT mwyalobs, xuTi wuTis Semdeg qalbatoni
van daani mibarebs da axla is mebuzRuneba.
asea, kiwi! advili nu ggonia, roca cudad aRzrdili arseba mudam
kritikulad ganwyobili iatakqveSeli ojaxis dausrulebeli sayvedurebis
mTavar obieqts igulisxme, mexamrids warmoadgen! saRamos, roca sawolSi
vwevar, im uamrav codvebze da danaSaulze vfiqrob, romelTac maweren.
saCivrebis siuxve imdenad mabnevs, rom xSirad vtiri, anda vicini, gaaCnia, Cems
Sinagan ganwyobilebas. Semdeg ki CameZina yovlad WkuisSemSleli fiqrebiT,
saxeldobr: iseTi ki ar unda gavxde, rogoric me minda, aramed sul sxvanairi,
anda me sul sxvanairi var da ara iseTi, rogoric minda viyo, ise ki ar unda
gavakeTo yvelaferi, rogorc me msurs, aramed sxvanairad. minda, sul sxvanairi
gavxde da ara iseTi, rogoric var, radgan me sul sxvanairi var da ara iseTi,
rogoric minda viyo...
da ai, Senc dagabnie! nu gamijavrdebi! me ar amovSli arafers, rac aq
SaviT TeTrze weria. axla, roca ase Wirs qaRaldis Sovna, furclis amoxevac
codvaa! amitom SemiZlia, mxolod rCeva mogce: nuRar waikiTxav ukanasknel
winadadebas da nu ecdebi gaigo, Torem ise daibnevi, Tavs veRar gaarTmev!
ana
orSabaTi, 7 dekemberi, 1942
Zvirfaso kiwi!

wels xanuka1 (1 ebraelTa saSobao dResaswauli (Zv. w. 164 wlis 25.XII iuda
makabevelma ierusalimSi xelaxla akurTxa antioqos IV mier wabilwuli
taZari)) da wminda nikolozis dRe2 (2 holandielebi wminda nikolozis dRes
ufro zeimoben, vidre Sobas.)) TiTqmis erTmaneTs emTxveva. xanukas aRsaniSnavad
mxolod sanTlebi davanTeT da isic aTi wuTiT, radgan sanTlebi axla Zneli
saSovaria, xolo roca simRera gaisma, namdvili sazeimo viTareba Seiqmna!
batonma van daanma lamazi xis Sandali gamoTala.
magram SabaTs wminda nikolozis dRe meti zeimiT aRvniSneT. Cven Zalian
gvainteresebda, raze eCurCulebodnen eli da mipi mamas, roca zeviT amodiodnen.
vgrZnobdiT, rom raRacas gvimzadebdnen. da ai, rva saaTze grZeli derefnis
gaswvriv kibeze daveSviT da patara gasasvlel oTaxSi aRmovCndiT. me SiSma
Semipyro da mxolod imas vnatrobdi, rom uvnebeli davbrunebuliyavi ukan!
radgan am oTaxs fanjrebi ar hqonda, sinaTle aanTes. mamam kedlis didi
ganjina gamoaRo: o, ra lamazia, wamoiZaxa yvelam. ganjinaSi idga didi
kalaTi Wreli qaRaldiT lamazad morTuli da `Savi peteris~ simboluri
niRbiT damSvenebuli. kalaTi mSvidobianad avitaneT zeviT da yvelam Tavisi
saCuqari miiRo; mas saTanado leqsic axlda. Sen kargad ici, rogori leqsi
iwereba amgvar SemTxvevebSi da amitom aq aRar momyavs. maCuqes namcxvris didi
Tojina. mamam wignis qvesadgami miiRo, dedam kalendari, qalbatonma van daanma
tomara mtvris Cvrebis Sesanaxad, batonma van daanma saferfle. yvelas SeurCies
sasiamovno saCuqari. Cven pirvelad vizeimeT wminda nikolozis dResaswauli da
vTvliT, rom premieram warmatebiT Caiara.
cxadia, Cveni `qvemoTa~ megobrebisTvisac movamzadeT saCuqrebi im
nivTebidan, rac Zveli ukeTesi droidan SemogvrCa. swored dRes gavigeT, rom
saferfle baton van daanisaTvis da wignebis qvesadgamebi mamaCemisTvis batonma
vosenma TviTon gaakeTa.
ana
xuTSabaTi, 10 dekemberi, 1942
Zvirfaso kiwi!
batoni van daani xorcis, Zexvis da sabaylo ganyofilebas ganagebda.
firmam igi miiwvia, rogorc am saqmis saukeTeso specialisti. da axla, Cvenda
sasixarulod, man Tavi gamoiCina, rogorc `Zexvis~ ostatma.
Cven bevri saZexve xorci SevukveTeT (cxadia, Sav bazarze), gadavwyviteT
Savi dRisTvis Zexvi mogvemaragebina. saintereso sayurebelia:L xorcs jer sakep
manqanaSi gaatareben or-samjer, Semdeg Seaneleben, kargad azelen da bolos
milakis meSveobiT nawlavebs avseben. Cven ukve mivirTviT sadilad Semwvari
Zexvi kombostos mwniliT. magram Sebolili Zexvi rom damzaddes, kargad unda
gamoSres. amitom Zexvi WerqveS Zelze gaWimul Tokebze Camokides. yvela, vinc
oTaxSi Semodis, WerqveS moqanave Zexvebs xedavs da icinis. marTlac sasaciloa.
oTaxSi saSineli aurzauri iyo. batoni van daani (colis winsafari
Semoexvia da ufro sqeli Canda, vidre sinamdvileSi iyo) TavgamodebiT
dastrialebda xorcs. gasisxlianebuli xelebi, gaoflianebuli, alewili
pirisaxe da dalaquli winsafari namdvili yasbis iers aZlevda. qalbaton van
daans, Cveulebriv, yvelafris erTbaSad gakeTeba surs: swavlobs
saxelmZRvanelodan holandiurs, urevs wvnians, Tvalyurs adevnebs xorcs da
amave dros kvnesis, radgan nekni stkiva. ai, ra xdeba, roca pativmoyvare, xanSi
Sesuli (!!) mandilosnebi sqeli ukanalis gasaxdomad yovlad saxifaTo
tanvarjiSs mimarTaven. dusels Tvalis anTeba aqvs, mTeli dRe RumelTan zis
da Tvalze kompress idebs. fanjarasTan Camomjdar mamas mzis nazi sxivi
dahnaTis. albaT, isev revmatizmi stanjavs, radgan moxrili zis da sacodavi
saxiT adevnebs Tvals baton van daanis saqmianobas. peteri daarbeninebs oTaxSi
katas (katas muSi hqvia). me, deda da margo kartofils vfcqvniT, magram am
saqmes meqanikurad vakeTebT da monusxulebiviT SevcqeriT baton van daans.
duselma, rogorc kbilis eqimma, praqtika ganaaxla. moganiWeb siamovnebas
da mogiyvebi, rogor Seudga mkurnalobas. deda auTovebda, roca qalbatonma van

daanma ganizraxa, pirveli pacienti gamxdariyo. qalbatoni van daani Sua oTaxSi
dadgmul skamze dajda, duselma ki saqmianad da mSvidad amoalaga
instrumentebi; sadezinfeqciod odekoloni moiTxova, xolo cvilis nacvlad
vazelini.
amis Semdeg qalbaton van daans pirSi Caxeda, ukana kbilebi gausinja.
daakakuna, moCxrika. qalbatoni wamdauwum tokavda, TiTqos tkivilisagan suli
exuTeboda da yovlad ucnaur bgerebs gamoscemda. xangrZlivi Semowmebis Semdeg
pacients ase egona, Torem sinamdvileSi mxolod ori wuTi Tu gavida
duselma gadawyvita, gamoxruli kbili amoewminda. magram amaze fiqric ki
zedmeti iyo! qalbatoni van daani veluriviT iqnevda xelebs da wixlebs
isroda, ase rom, duseli iZulebuli Seiqna xeli SeeSva kauWisaTvis, romliTac
kbils uwmendda. qalbaton van daans kauWi kbilSi gaeCxira. axla ki aiwyvita
eSmakma! kbilSi kauWgaCrili qalbatoni aqeT-iqiT awydeboda da cdilobda
rogorme amoeZro, magram kidev ufro Rrmad irWobda kbilSi. doinjSemoyrili
duseli sruliad mSvidad idga iqve da am speqtakls uyurebda, danarCenebi
vxarxarebdiT. Cveni mxriv, es simdable iyo: albaT, mec gvarianad viRrialebdi.
bolos, saSineli garjis, oxvrisa da kvnesis Semdeg qalbatonma kbilebSi
gaCxiruli iaraRi amoiZro da duselma isev ganagrZo muSaoba, TiTqos aq
araferiao. muSaobda swrafad. pacients dro aRar rCeboda, raime moemoqmedebina.
dusels albaT arasodes ar hyolia amdeni TanaSemwe. me da batoni van daani
asistentebi gaxldiT da yvelani erTad uTuod ise gamoviyurebodiT, TiTqos
gacocxlebuliyos Suasaukuneebis naxati `Sarlatanebi muSaoben~.
bolos da bolos pacientma moTmineba dakarga da ganacxada, sadils unda
mivxedoo. erTi ram cxadia: qalbatoni van daani ase male aRar miakiTxavs
kbilis eqims.
ana
kvira, 13 dekemberi, 1942
Zvirfaso kiwi!
didi kontoris fanjarasTan myudrod movikalaTe da sqel fardebs Soris
darCenili WuWrutanidan vuTvalTvaleb, ra xdeba gareT. Tumca bindi Camowva,
magram, imisaTvis rom Sen mogwero, sinaTle kmara.
ucnauri sayurebelia, rogor darbian adamianebi quCaSi! ase mgonia,
saSinlad eCqarebaT sadRac da lamisaa sakuTar fexebs gamoedon. velosipedebs
ise miaqroleben, rom Zneli gasarCevia, vin zis zed, qali Tu kaci.
Cveni raioni tipuri muSaTa ubania. umravlesobas siRaribis daRi azis,
bavSvebi ki iseTi WuWyianebi arian, rom mxolod sakeciT Tu Seexebi. namdvili
wvintliani quCis bavSvebia, romlebic Znelad gasageb dialeqtze laparakoben.
guSin, roca me da margo tans vibandiT, aseTi azri damebada: ra kargi
iqneboda, rom SemeZlos am patara sazogadoebidan ramdenime bavSvis ankesiT
daWera, zeviT amoyvana, abazanaSi Casma, dabana, sufTad gamowyoba da saTamaSod
quCaSi gaSveba, maSin... xval iseTive WuWyianebi da Camofxrewilebi irbenen,
Semawyvetina margom.
gareT sxvac bevria saintereso: avtomobilebi, kaparWebi, wvima. mesmis
tramvais borblebis RrWiali da aTasgvar ambebs vTxzav. Cveni fiqrebi iseve
naklebad icvlebian, rogorc Cven TviTon, mudam erT wreSi trialeben:
ebraelebi saWmeli, saWmeli politika, xolo politikidan... raki
ebraelebi vaxsene, ai ra unda giTxra: guSin, roca WuWrutanaSi vicqirebodi,
quCaSi orma ebraelma gaiara. ucnauri grZnoba mqonda, TiTqos me isini gaveci
imiT, rom aq vzivar da maT ubedurebas vuyureb.
zustad Cveni saxlis pirdapir sacxovrebeli barJa dgas. barJaze
cxovrobs mezRvauri Tavisi ojaxiT. hyavT patara ZaRli, romelsac yefiT
vcnobT da romlis kuds mxolod maSin vxedav, roca qimis gaswvriv darbis.
isev dauSva wvimam, adamianTa umravlesobam qolgebs Seafara Tavi. axla
mxolod sawvimarebi da aqa-iq kapiuSonebi moCans.

dasanaxi meti arc araferia. me isedac kargad vicnob am qalebs, mwvane da

wiTeli makintoSebiT rom Caivlian xolme. gacveTili quslebi, mklavze
Camokidebuli gaxexili CanTebi, SeSupebuli, damZimebuli sxeulebi, radgan sxva
saWmeli ara aqvT da kartofils eZalebian. zogs sacodavi gamometyveleba aqvs,
zogs kmayofili, albaT imisda mixedviT, Tu ra xasiaTzea qmari.
ana
samSabaTi, 22 dekemberi, 1942
Zvirfaso kiwi!
TavSesaframde sasixarulo ambavma moaRwia: saSobaod yvelas damatebiT
100 gram karaqs dagvirigeben. oficialurad naxevar girvanqas iZlevian, magram
es exeba im bednier momakvdavT, romlebic gareT Tavisuflad cxovroben, Cven,
ltolvilebs ki rva kacze mxolod oTxi baraTi gvaqvs da 100 gramic gvaxarebs.
Cven gvinda am karaqiT rame gamovacxoT. me gamovacxob puris kverebs da or
torts. sanam saojaxo saqmes ar movrCebiT, deda arc kiTxvis uflebas gvaZlevs
da arc mecadineobisa. neknnatkeni qalbatoni van daani sawolSi wevs, dilidan
saRamomde moTqvams da Cvenda uneburad unda movuaroT. waramara kompresebs
vadebT, magram mainc sul ukmayofiloa. mirCevnia, fexze idges da sakuTar
saqmes TviTon mixedos. erTi ram unda vaRiaro: igi Zalze Sromismoyvarea, xolo
roca sulierad da fizikurad kargad grZnobs Tavs, mxiarulic.
is ar kmara, rom mTeli dRe maCumeben `su, su~-o, aqaoda Zalze xmamaRla
vlaparakob, axla Cems pativcemul mezobels dasCemda Ramec misisinos. mas rom
hkiTxo, Rame sawolSi gadabrunebac ki ar SeiZleba. me Tavi ise miWiravs, TiTqos
verafers vamCnev, magram dReidan, rogorc ki momaZaxebs `su, su~-o, mec aseTive
sisiniT vupasuxeb. isedac gabrazebuli var masze. kviraobiT uTenia dgeba,
sinaTles anTebs da varjiSs iwyebs. ase mgonia, TiTqos varjiSi saaTobiT
grZeldeba. amave dros Zalian mouridebelia, waramara ejaxeba skamebs,
romelTac sawolis dasagrZeleblad viyeneb, da sabolood mafxizlebs. vdgebi,
magram Zili maklia, siamovnebiT daviZinebdi kidev ramdenime xans. xolo roca
`siZlierisa da silamazisaken~ mimavali gza iwureba, duseli Cacmas iwyebs.
nifxavs dawolis win kauWze kidebs, amitom jer iqiTken midis, Semdeg ki ukan
brundeba. ra Tqma unda, aviwydeba halstuxi, romelic magidaze devs. axla isev
iqiT-aqeT darbis, Tanac skamebs ejaxeba. mSvidobiT, Cemo kviris tkbilo Zilo!
magram ra azri aqvs sasacilo moxucebze Civils? xandaxan xelebi
meqaveba, minda raime oini movuwyo: davuketo kari, amovxraxno naTura, davumalo
tansacmeli?! Tavs mxolod imiT vikaveb, rom ar minda sanatreli simSvide
davarRvio.
oho, me Wkua memateba! aq yvelaferi gonivrulad unda gaakeTo: enas kbili
daaWiro, sxvebs gaugono, zrdilobianad, Tavazianad moeqce, dauTmo da kidev
ramdeni ram. Wkua, romelic isedac cota maqvs, albaT, aq Zalian Cqara
Semomexarjeba da omis Semdgomi droisaTvis aRaraferi damrCeba.
ana
oTxSabaTi, 13 ianvari, 1943
Zvirfaso kiwi!
dRes isev sazizRar gunebaze varT, ar SegviZlia mSvidad jdoma da
muSaoba. qveyanaze raRac saSineleba trialebs. sabralo xalxs dRe da Rame
sadRac mierekebian da, garda zurgCanTisa da cotaodeni fulisa, Tan arafris
waRebis uflebas ar aZleven (Semdeg amasac arTmeven).
ojaxebs ancalkeveben, bavSvebs ded-mamas aSoreben. zogjer skolidan
dabrunebul bavSvs Sin mSoblebi aRar egebebian, savaWrod gasul qals bina
daluquli xvdeba, xolo ojaxi gasaxlebuli.
axla qristianebs Sorisac didi mRelvarebaa. axalgazrdebs, vaJiSvilebs,
germaniaSi agzavnian. yvela dadardianebulia!
yovel Rame holandiis gavliT asobiT TviTmfrinavi mifrinavs germaniis
qalaqebis dasabombad. ruseTsa da afrikaSi yovel saaTSi aTasobiT adamiani

iRupeba! mTeli msoflio gagiJda, yvelgan ngreva da sikvdilia. cxadia,

mokavSireebi axla ukeTes mdgomareobaSi arian, magram am ambavs bolo mainc ar
uCans.
Cven ra gviWirs, milionobiT adamianze ukeT vcxovrobT. vsxedvarT
CvenTvis mSvidad, saimedod, SegviZlia omis Semdgom gegmebzec vifiqroT,
gvaxarebs axali tansacmeli da wigni. ukeTesi iqneboda gvefiqra imaze, Tu
rogor davzogoT yoveli centi da tyuilubralod ar gadavagdoT, radgan unda
gadavarCinoT yvela, visi gadarCenac ki SeiZleba da daxmareba aRmovuCinoT.
Cveni ubnis bavSvebi Txeli bluzebis amara, upaltood, uqudod,
uxelTaTmnod datantaleben, fexze xis qoSebi acviaT. kuWi carieli aqvT,
stafilos RrRnian, civi binidan svel quCaSi gamorbian (quCaSi qari qris),
skolaSi midian da gayinul, nestian klasSi sxedan. holandia iqamde mivida, rom
bavSvebi quCaSi gamvlelebs puris natexs sTxoven. SemiZlia saaTobiT
vilaparako imaze, Tu ra ubedureba moaqvs oms, magram me es kidev ufro metad
maRonebs. Cven isRa dagvrCenia, rom mSvidad da gulmagrad velodoT, rodis
miiwureba Savi dRe. elis yvela, ebraeli da qristiani, elian xalxebi da mTeli
msoflio da... bevri sikvdils elis!
ana
SabaTi, 30 ianvari, 1943
Zvirfaso kiwi!
lamis gavcofde, magram Tavi unda Sevikavo. minda fexebi vabakuno,
viyviro, deda SevanjRrio da ar vici, meti raRa vqna im damcinavi mzeris,
boroti sityvebisa da braldebebis gamo, romelTac yoveldRe ise mayrian,
rogorc isrebs magrad daWimuli mSvildidan. minda vuyviro dedas, margos,
dusels, van daanebs da mamasac ki: Tavi damanebeT, momasveneT! gana ase
aucilebelia yovel Rame cremliT dasvelebul baliSze dameZinos dasiebuli
TvalebiT da damZimebuli TaviT. nu momekarebiT, minda yvelas gagecaloT,
Tumca umjobesia saerTod gavecalo am qveyanas! magram araferi gamomdis. maT
warmodgena ara aqvT, rogor warmekveTeba sasoeba, ar esmiT, ra tkivils
mayeneben.
maT TanagrZnobasa da ironias sruliad veRar vitan! ise var gamwarebuli,
lamis vibRavlo.
sakmarisia, piri gavaRo da maT ukve hgoniaT, TiTqos raRaca zedmeti
vTqvi. roca Cumad var, ecinebaT; yoveli Cemi pasuxi ukmexad eCvenebaT,
gonivruli azri cbierebad, Tu daviRale, zarmacs meZaxian, Tu erTi zedmeti
kovzi gadmoviRe egoists. ras ar maweren: mxdalic var, angariSianic, eSmakic
da a. S. mTeli dRe mxolod imazea laparaki, Tu ra autaneli arseba var. Tumca
me vicini da ise miWiravs Tavi, TiTqos yvelaferi fexebze mkidia, magram
sinamdvileSi srulebiT ar aris ase.
RmerTs vTxovdi, iseTi xasiaTi moeca CemTvis, romelic yvelas Cems
winaaRmdeg ar aamxedrebda, magram vici, rom amas araferi eSveleba. bunebam
aseTi Semqmna. Tumca me vgrZnob, rom cudi ara var. maT odnavadac ki ver
warmoudgeniaT, rogor vcdilob vasiamovno yvelas. Cemi Rrma mwuxareba rom
davmalo, maTTan erTad vicini. ramdenjer mimixlia dedisaTvis pirSi, roca
usamarTlod momqcevia: CemTvis sul erTia, Tqvi, rac ginda, oRond Tavi
damanebe, xom xedav, rom gamousworebeli var-meTqi!
amis Semdeg meubnebian, Tavxedi xaro da meore dRes zed ar miyureben.
Semdeg yvelafers iviwyeben da mapatieben. me ki ar SemiZlia erT dRes adamians
vesiyvarulebode, velaqucebode, xolo meore dRes mZuldes! umjobesia, avirCio
saSualo xazi, Cemi fiqrebi CemTvis Sevinaxo da maT iseve agdebulad moveqce,
rogorc me meqcevian. netav ki SemaZlebina!
ana
paraskevi, 5 Tebervali, 1943
Zvirfaso kiwi!

Cxubsa da kinklaobaze didi xania SenTvis araferi momiweria, Tumca am

mxriv araferi Secvlila. batoni duseli pirvelad tragikulad aRiqvamda
yovelgvar uTanxmoebas, magram bolos SeeCvia amas da cdilobs ar Caerios.
margosa da peterSi `axalgazrduli~ araferia, orive wynaria, Tavs Segawyenen.
ra Tqma unda, me maTgan gamovirCevi da wamdauwum mesmis: aiRe magaliTi
margosa da peterisagan, isini arasodes ar iqcevian SensaviT! ra saZaglobaa!
unda gamogityde, rom arafris gulisTvis ar minda viyo iseTi, rogoric margoa.
Cemi azriT, igi Zalze modunebuli da uniaToa. yvelas gavlenis qveS eqceva,
yvelas uTmobs. adamians xom unda hqondes sakuTari azri! jobia, gavCumde da es
Teoria aravis gavuziaro, Torem damcineben.
sufraze mudam igrZnoba daZabuloba. igi mxolod maSin klebulobs
odnav, roca kontoridan stumrebi gvewvevian, romlebic erTi TefSi wvnianis
Sesaxvrepad amodian CvenTan.
dRes, sadilze batonma van daanma kvlav aRniSna, rom margo Zalian cotas
Wams. albaT gasuqebis eSinia, geslianad dasZina man. dedam, romelic mudam
TavgamodebiT icavs margos, xmamaRla miaxala: me veRar vitan Tqvens
sulelur SeniSvnebs! qalbatoni van daani WarxaliviT gawiTlda. darcxvenili
van daani ki erT wertils miaSterda.
zogjer yvelani bevrs viciniT. amas winaT qalbatonma van daanma Zalian
gagvamxiarula. gviambo, rogor arSiyobda axalgazrdobaSi da ra marjved
`atyuebda~ mamas. Tu axalgazrda kaci xelebis faTurs dagiwyebs, marigebdao
mama, Sen unda uTxra: `batono Cemo, me wesieri qali gaxlavarT!~ da igi imwamsve
mixvdeba, visTan aqvs saqme! Cven ise vicinodiT, TiTqos Zalze gonebamaxvili
xumroba movismineT.
Tumca peteri Zalian wynaria, magram zogjer mainc davciniT da amiT
verTobiT. misi susti mxare ucxo sityvebia, romelTa mniSvneloba metwilad ar
esmis da zogjer ise uadgilod xmarobs, rom didi sisulele gamodis. erT
dRes kontoraSi xalxi iyo da sapirfareSoTi sargebloba ar SeiZleboda,
magram peters gauWirda, moisaqmiana da ar Carecxa. Cvens gasafrTxileblad ki
karebze qaRaldi miakra da zed waawera `Sil vous plait, gazebia!~ cxadia mas
undoda eTqva `frTxilad, gazebia!~ magram egona franguli ufro zrdilobianad
JRers da Cans warmodgena ar hqonda, rom `Sil vous plait~ niSnavs `inebeT, geTayva~.
ana
SabaTi, 27 Tebervali, 1943
Zvirfaso kiwi!
yoveldRe veliT mokavSireTa jarebis gadmosxmas. CerCils filtvebis
anTeba hqonda, magram axla ukeTaa. gandim, romelic indoeTis
ganTavisuflebisaTvis ibrZvis, es ukve meramdenejer gamoacxada SimSiloba.
qalbatoni van daani gvarwmunebs, rom fatalistia. magram vis acaxcaxebs
yvelaze metad srolis dros? ra Tqma unda, mas, petronelas.
henkma mogvitana episkoposis mimarTva mrevlisadmi, romelsac sajarod
kiTxuloben yvela eklesiaSi. mimarTva didebuli da aRmafrTovanebelia.
`niderlandelebo, gul-xeli nu dagikrefiaT! SeiaraRdiT da ibrZoleT xalxisa,
Tavisuflebisa, samSoblosa da sarwmunoebisaTvis. daexmareT erTmaneTs,
nurafers daiSurebT erTmaneTisaTvis, nu miecemiT sasowarkveTilebas!..~ ai ras
qadagebs episkoposi. moitans ki Svebas amgvari qadageba? CvenTvis,
ebraelebisaTvis, cxadia, ara.
rom icode, ra moxda. Cvenma saxlis patronma saxli gayida ise, rom arc
batoni koophoisi gaufrTxilebia da arc batoni kraleri. erT diliT
moulodnelad gamocxadda saxlis dasaTvaliereblad arqiteqtorTan erTad.
madloba RmerTs, batoni koophoisi kontoraSi iyo. mosulebs yvelaferi aCvena,
garda saxlis ukana mxarisa. TiTqosda Sida karis gasaRebi saxlSi darCa. maT
araferi ukiTxavT. imedi maqvs, rom saxlis ukana mxaris sanaxavad aRar movlen.
CvenTvis es saSineleba iqneboda.

mamam axali kartoTeka gvaCuqa sufTa baraTebiT. amgvarad, me da margos

wignebis katalogi gveqneba. Cven viwerT yovel wigns, romelic wavikiTxeT da
aRvniSnavT ara marto avtoris gvarsa da wignis saTaurs, aramed Cvens
SeniSvnebsac. ucxo sityvebisa da gamoTqmebisaTvis calke rveuli SeviZine.
am bolo dros me da deda ukeT vewyobiT erTmaneTs, magram namdvili
ndoba Cvens Soris arasodes ar iqneba. margo sul ufro xSirad miwyreba, mama
ki gulCaTxrobili gaxda, etyoba, raRac awuxebs. miuxedavad amisa, igi mainc
yvelaze ukeTesia.
CvenTan SemoiRes karaqisa da margarinis ganawilebis axali wesi.
TiToeuls TefSze udeben mTeli dRis ulufas, Cemi azriT, van daanebi
sindisierad ar anawileben, magram Cems mSoblebs mobezrdaT yoveldRe maTTan
kinklaoba da arafers ar amboben. me ki mgonia, aseT xalxs samagiero aseve unda
gadauxado!
ana
oTxSabaTi, 10 marti, 1943
Zvirfaso kiwi!
guSin saRamos isev moxda mokle CarTva, sinaTle Caqra, gareT ki
sazenito qvemexebi quxdnen. verafriT ver damiZlevia SiSi, romelsac CemSi
srola da sahaero Tavdasxma iwvevs. TiTqmis yovel Rame mamis sawolSi
mivZvrebi. iqneb, Seni azriT, aseTi saqcieli bavSvobaa, magram aba erTi TviTon
gamoscade!
qvemexebis quxilSi sakuTari xmac ki ar gvesmis. qalbatoni van daani,
Cveni fatalisti, TiTqmis tiroda da CurCuliT ambobda: `o, ra saSineli
srolaa!~ gana ar jobda pirdapir eTqva: `o, rogor meSinia?!~ diliT ise ar
meSinia, rogorc Rame, bnelSi. akankalebuli, Cemda uneburad vyvirodi,
vemudarebodi mamas sanTeli aenTo, magram mama ulmobeli aRmoCnda da
sibneleSi dagvtova. uecrad tyviamfrqvevis kakani atyda, rac sazenito
qvemexebis quxilze uaresia. deda sawolidan wamoxta da sanTeli aanTo, pimi
Zalian gajavrda. xolo roca sayvedurebze gadavida, dedam mtkiced upasuxa:
`ane SensaviT nacadi jariskaci araa!~ amiT gaTavda yvelaferi.
nuTu ar mogiyevi, ra Savi dRe daadga qalbaton van daans? Sen yvelaferi
unda icode, rac Cvens TavSesafarSi xdeba. erTxel qalbaton van daans
sxvenidan fexis xma moesma, egona qurdebi ariano da ise dafrTxa, rom qmari
gaaRviZa. amasobaSi xmauri Sewyda, baton van daans, mxolod fatalistis gulis
Zlieri bagabugi esmoda. `ah, puwi!~ (baton van daanis saferebeli saxelia),
`albaT, Zexvi da lobio mogvpares. Cveni peteri? peteri cocxalia?~ `peters
aravin moiparavs, nu geSinia, damaZine!~ ris Zili, SeSinebuls mTeli Rame Tvali
ar mouxuWavs. ramdenime dRis Semdeg idumalma xmaurma kvlav gamoaRviZa mTeli
ojaxi. peterma jibis farani aiRo, sxvenze avida da roca gaanaTa, frrrr!
virTxebis mTeli jogi daafrTxo. amgvarad gavigeT, vin iyvnen qurdebi da
sxvenze muSi davtoveT dasaZineblad. daupatiJebeli stumrebi jerjerobiT ar
gamoCenilan, yovel SemTxvevaSi RamRamobiT siwynarea, magram ramdenime dRis
winaT SeRamebisas peteri sxvenze avida (rvis naxevari iyo da jer ar bneloda)
Zveli gazeTebis Camosatanad. roca ukan brundeboda, liuks moeWida da xeli
ise daado ficars, rom arc ki dauxedia... uecrad SiSisa da tkivilisagan
kinaRam kibeze dagorda. virTxam magrad ukbina xelze, piJama sisxliT hqonda
mosvrili. mitkaliviT gafiTrebuls muxlebi ukankalebda. gasakviri araferia!
gulis asarevad isic kmara, rom virTxas mokido xeli da Tu kidec gikbina... ra
sazizRrobaa!
ana
paraskevi, 12 marti, 1943
Zvirfaso kiwi!
neba miboZe warmogidgino deda franki, axalgazrdebis qomagi! karaqis
damatebiTi ulufa ai, Tanamedrove axalgazrdobis saWirboroto problema.

deda mudam gveqomageba me, margos da peters da xangrZlivi davis Semdeg Tavisi
gaaqvs.
gagvifuWda erTi qila dakonservebuli ena. muSis da mofis didebuli
sadili eqnebaT. marTla, Sen jer ar icnob mofis. igi aq iyo `iatakqveSelTa~
mosvlamde. cxovrobs kontorasa da sawyobSi, afrTxobs virTxebs. misi
politikuri saxelis axsna ar aris Zneli. adre firmas ori kata hyavda, erTi
sawyobSi, meore sxvenze. rogorc ki erTmaneTs Sexvdebodnen, saSineli Cxubi
iwyeboda. Cxubis Tavi sawyobis kata iyo, magram gamarjvebuli mudam sxvenis
kata gamodioda. saxelebic maTi xasiaTis Sesaferi Searqves. sawyobis kata iyo
germaneli, anu mofi, sxvenis kata ki ingliseli, anu tomi. tomi viRacisaTvis
uCuqebiaT, mofi ki axlac aq aris da, roca Zirs CavdivarT, gveTamaSeba.
es-esaa mamam gviTxra, rom metismetad SeSfoTebulia. ra sevdiani Tvalebi
aqvs, sabralo mama!
ver movwydi ina budier-bakeris wigns `karze dakakuneba~. saojaxo romania,
saocrad aqvs aRwerili adamianebis urTierToba. sxva yvelaferi, rasac igi
exeba omi, qalTa sakiTxi, mwerlebi, naklebad momwons da, gulaxdilad rom
giTxra, naklebad mainteresebs.
bombdamSenebma saSinlad dabombes germania.
batoni van daani cud gunebazea. mosawevi araferi aqvs. dava imis Sesaxeb,
SevWamoT Tu ara axla bostneulis konservebi, Cveni partiis sasargeblod
gadawyda. maRali saTxilamuro fexsacmelebis garda, veRarafers vicvam, saxlSi
ki ase siaruli Semawuxebelia. erTi wyvili Calis sandlebi erT kviras meyo,
mere isev fexSiSveli aRmovCndi. iqneb mipma miSovos rame Sav bazarze. mas Tma
aqvs Sesasworebeli. marwmunebs, ise kargad mkreW, sxva parikmaxerTan
aRarasodes wavalo. kargi iqneboda, yursac rom ar vaTlide xSirad.
ana
xuTSabaTi, 18 marti, 1943
Zvirfaso kiwi!
TurqeTi omSi Caeba. yvela aRelvebulia. mouTmenlad veliT
radiogadacemas.
ana
paraskevi, 19 marti, 1943
Zvirfaso kiwi!
sixaruls imedis gacrueba mohyva, rac Zalze usiamoa! TurqeTi ar
Cabmula omSi! iqaur sagareo saqmeTa ministrs mxolod is uTqvams, rom Cvens
neitralitets male bolo moeRebao. gazeTis gamyidveli ki damis1 (1 moedani
mefis sasaxlis win.) moedanze yviroda:
`TurqeTi ingliselebs miemxro!~
ase gaCnda es Wori da Cvenamdec moaRwia.
500 da 1000 guldeniani qaRaldis fuli gaauqmes. didi zarali naxes
spekulantebma da `Savi~ fulis mflobelebma; magram dazaraldnen is
adamianebic, romlebic imalebian. roca 1000 guldenians axurdaveb, unda
daamtkico, saidan gaqvs, Tumca am kviris bolomde SeiZleba maTi gamoyeneba da
gadasaxadebis gadaxda.
duselma xelis bormanqana miiRo da male Cems mkurnalobas Seudgeba.
`uklebliv yvela germanelis fiurerma~ daWril jariskacebs sityviT
mimarTa, Semdeg ki `esaubra~. maTi saubari Semzaravi mosasmeni iyo. magaliTad:
hainrix Sepeli gaxlavarT!
sad daiWeri?
stalingradTan!
sad xar daWrili?
moyinuli maqvs orive fexi, marcxena xelis maja ki motexili!
zustad ase gadmoscems radio marionetebis am sazarel scenas. daWrilebi
TiTqos amayoben kidec xeibrobiT. aqao da, rac ufro uaresad grZnob Tavs, miT

ukeTesi! erTi kia, roca mas fiurerma CamosarTmevad xeli gauwoda (Tuki xeli
saerTod SerCa), ise daibna, rom xmis amoReba ver SeZlo.
ana
xuTSabaTi, 25 marti, 1943
Zvirfaso kiwi!
guSin dedam, mamam, margom da me myudrod movikalaTeT. uceb peteri
Semovida da mamasTan CurCuli gaaba. me mxolod amas movkari yuri: `sawyobSi
kasria gadayiravebuli~ da `karebTan viRac faTurobda~. es margomac gaigona,
magram me damiwyo damSvideba, radgan, mama myisve peters gahyva, me ki usazRvro
SiSisagan carciviT gavfiTrebulvar.
visxediT da velodiT, oriode wuTis Semdeg qalbatoni van daani
gamocxadda. igi kabinetSi radios usmenda, magram mamas uTxovia, radio
gamoerTo da Cumad amosuliyo zeviT. roca Zalian frTxilob, metwilad
araferi gamodis. qalbaton van daans egona, mis fexqveS Zveli kibis safexurebi
saSinlad Wrialebda. gavida xuTi wuTi... bolos gafiTrebuli mama da peteri
dabrundnen da gviambes, rac naxes. jer kibeze Camosxdnen da smenad iqcnen,
magram araferi ismoda. uecrad gaigones ori Zlieri dartyma, TiTqos viRacam
saxlSi karebi gaijaxuna. pimi fexis erTi dakvriT zeviT amovarda, peteri ki
duselTan Sevida. oTaxidan gamosvlamde duselma gulmodgined Caalaga Tavisi
bargi-barxana. fexze gavixadeT da yvelani zeviT, van daanebTan avediT.
gaciebuli van daani sawolSi iwva. Cven mis sawolTan SevquCdiT da, cxadia,
Cveni eWvebi CurCuliT gavuziareT. roca van daani xmamaRla axvelebda, me da
misi coli SiSiT vkvdebodiT. viRacas brwyinvale azri daebada, gadavwyviteT,
van daanisaTvis kodeini migveca. xvela maSinve Seuwyda.
Cven velodiT, velodiT dausruleblad... da radgan karga xans aRaraferi
ismoda, gadavwyviteT, uTuod qurdebma gamoyruebul saxlSi fexis xma gaigones
da gaiqcnen. saubedurod, skamebiT garSemortymuli radiomimRebi inglisis
radiosadguris talRaze iyo momarTuli da yvelas SeeZlo efiqra, rom
oTaxidan es-esaa gavidnen, xolo Tu karebi Semomtvreulia da haersawinaaRmdego
dacvis guSagebi SeamCneven, policias Seatyobineben da amas SeiZleba Zalze
usiamo Sedegi mohyves. miuxedavad avadmyofobisa, batoni van daani mainc
wamodga, tanze Caicva, qudi daixura da mamasTan erTad kibeze daeSva. peteric
maT gaedevna da safrTxisagan Tavis dasacavad CaquCiT SeiaraRda. qalbatoni van
daani, deda, me da margo sulganabulni velodiT. xuTi wuTis Semdeg kacebi
dabrundnen da mogvaxsenes, rom saxifaTo araferia; SevTanxmdiT, onkani ar
mogveSva da sapirfareSo ar Cagverecxa. magram SiSisagan yvelas muceli
astkivda da SegiZlia warmoidgino, ra suni idga erT adgilas, mas Semdeg, rac
yvelam moisaqma.
magram usiamovnebas Cveulebriv kidev ufro meti usiamovneba mosdevs. asea
aqac. jer erTi, vestertumis zarma rekva Sewyvita. me ki Zalian momwonda,
TiTqos mamSvidebda am zaris rekva. meorec, Tumca vicodiT, rom batoni voseni
guSin saRamos Zalian adre wavida, magram ar vicodiT, misi wasvlis Semdeg
gasaRebi elim waiRo Tu ara. iqneb daaviwyda karebis daketva. marTalia, rva
saaTidan TerTmetis naxevramde aRaraferi gagvigonia, magram mainc vRelavdiT.
roca davmSviddiT, CavukvirdiT am ambavs da sakmaod daujereblad mogveCvena,
rom qurdi karebis Semomtvrevas cdilobda ase adre, roca quCaSi amdeni
xalxia. viRacam gamoTqva varaudi, mezobeli saxlis sawyobSi SeiZleba jer
kidev muSaobeno. xolo roca saxls aseTi Txeli kedlebi aqvs, SeiZleba ver
gaigo, saidan modis xma. ras ar warmoidgens adamiani, roca Zlier Relavs.
bolos davweqiT, magram mSvidad aravis eZina. mama, deda da duseli waramara
wamovardebodnen sawolidan. SeiZleba cotas vaWarbeb, magram arc me momixuWavs
Tvali.
diliT Cveni mamakacebi qveviT Cavidnen. undodaT gaegoT, gareTa kari Ria
xom ar iyo, magram yvelaferi rigze aRmoCnda. mTeli es ambavi, romelmac
amdeni SiSi gvaWama, dawvrilebiT vuambeT kontoris personals. Tu fexi

dagicda, dacinvas ar dagakleben, magram roca safrTxe gaivlis, sicili

advilia. mxolod eli Sexvda gancdebs seriozulad.
ana
SabaTi, 27 marti, 1943
Zvirfaso kiwi!
stenografiis kursi davamTavre. axla Cven siCqareSi vvarjiSobT da male
wuTSi marcvalTa sarekordo ricxvs mivaRwevT. minda ukeT icode, rogor
vcdilob drois mokvlas (es gamoTqma specialurad movigone, radgan aq
yvelafers mxolod imitom vakeTebT, rom rac SeiZleba metad SevavsoT dro,
sanam TavSesafarSi yofna mogvixdeba): gatacebuli var miTologiiT. yvelaze
metad ki mainteresebs Tqmulebebi berZnul da romaul RmerTebze. Cvenebi
fiqroben, rom es droebiTi gatacebaa, radgan arasodes smeniaT, gogona
miTologiiT yofiliyos gatacebuli. keTili! me viqnebi pirveli!
batoni van daani gaciebulia, ufro sworad, xma aqvs CaxleCili da amis
gamo aliaqoTi atexa. yelSi raRacas ivlebs, gvirilas nayens svams, morenis
tinqturas icxebs, cxviris, yelis, sasisa da enis malamoebs xmarobs da amave
dros... saSinlad Wirveulobs.
rauterma, holandiaSi erT-erTma maRali Tanamdebobis germanelma
moxelem, sityva warmoTqva: pirvel ivlisamde germaniis mTeli samflobelodan
ebraelebi unda aRigavono. pirveli aprilidan pirvel maisamde utrextis
provincia unda gaiwmindos (TiTqos saubari samzareulos wmendas exebodes).
pirveli maisidan pirvel ivnisamde Crdilo da dasavleT holandia. sneuli
da upatrono pirutyvis msgavsad, garekaven ubedurebs sasaklaoze. jobia,
gavCumde. roca amaze vfiqrob, koSmarebi maxrCobs...
am xnis ganmavlobaSi sasixarulo ambebic moxda. sabotaJis mizniT
germaniis Sromis birJas cecxli waukides. ramdenime dRis Semdeg ki
samisamarTo biuro gadawves. germaneli policielebis formaSi gamowyobilma
adamianebma guSagebi Sekres da mTeli mniSvnelovani kartoTeka gaitaces. ase
rom, axla germanelebs gauWirdebaT vinmes moZebna da gamoZaxeba.
ana
xuTSabaTi, 1 aprili, 1943
Zvirfaso kiwi!
Tumca dRes pirveli aprilia, magram xumrobis xasiaTze ara varT! Cvenze
axla zedgamoWrilia aseTi andaza: `win wyali da ukan mewyeri~. jer erTi, Cvens
mfarvel koophoiss guSin Zlieri sisxlisdena hqonda kuWidan da sul cota
sami kvira gaunZrevlad unda iwves; meorec, eli gripiT gaxda avad; mesame,
batoni voseni momaval kviras saavadmyofoSi wveba. mgoni kuWis wyluli
aRmoaCnda da operacia unda gaikeTos.
firmam mniSvnelovani saqmiani molaparakeba unda awarmoos da mamam baton
koophoisTan erTad yvelaferi gaiTvaliswina. kraleris momzadeba da
informireba ase swrafad ar moxerxdeba. mamas acaxcaxebs, roca molaparakebis
msvlelobaze fiqrobs.
neta SemeZlos daswreba, ambobs igi, qveviT Casvla rom SemeZlos.
daweqi iatakze da yvelafers moismen, TaTbiri xom kabinetSi eqnebaT,
mamas saxe gaunaTda. TerTmetis naxevarze margom da mamam iatakze msmenelTa
pozicia daikaves. erT wyvil yurs ori wyvili jobia. magram molaparakeba
sadilobamde ver daamTavres, nasadilevs ki mamam veRar SeZlo iatakze wola,
uCveulo mdgomareobam rogorRac moTela. samis naxevarze, roca kvlav mogvesma
qvemodan laparaki, mamis adgili me davikave, male margoc SemomierTda. saubari
grZeli, mosawyeni meCvena da uecrad civ da magar linoleumze gawolils
CameZina. margom ver gabeda xeli ekra CemTvis an daeZaxa, radgan eSinoda, qveviT
araferi gaegonaT. naxevari saaTi mainc meZina da roca gamomeRviZa, swored is
damaviwyda, rac mTavari iyo. sabednierod, margo Cemze yuradRebiani aRmoCnda.
ana

paraskevi, 2 aprili, 1943

Zvirfaso kiwi!
kvlav saSineli codva Cavidine. guSin saRamos, rogorc yovelTvis,
velodi mamas, romelic saRamoobiT CemTan erTad loculobs da wasvlisas
meubneba: `Zili nebisa~. magram amjerad movida deda, damijda sawolze da
moridebiT, gaubedavad mkiTxa: ane, mama jer ver mova, ginda erTad vilocoT?
ara, deda, ar minda, vupasuxe me.
deda wamodga, mcire xans Cems sawolTan SeCerda, mere ki nela wavida
karisken. uecrad Semotrialda da saxeareulma miTxra:
ara, ar giwyrebi, ana, siyvaruli ZaliT ar iqneba! roca oTaxidan
gadioda, saxeze cremli Camougorda.
Tumca gaunZrevlad viweqi, magram imwamsve vigrZeni, ra didi simdable
Cavidine, roca ase uxeSad vkari xeli dedas. ra vqna, sxvanairad moqceva me ar
SemeZlo. ar SemiZlia pirferoba. ar SemeZlo, Cemi survilis winaaRmdeg
wavsuliyavi da dedasTan erTad meloca.
mebraleba deda, didad mebraleba, radgan pirvelad vigrZeni, rom Cemi
damokidebuleba misTvis sul erTi araa. roca miTxra, siyvaruli ZaliT ar
iqnebao, mis saxeze sevda da mwuxareba amovikiTxe. Znelia simarTlis Tqma da
mainc simarTles versad gaeqcevi: dedam TviTom mkra xeli. misi bralia, rom
CemSi aRarafers iwvevs misi siyvaruli, misi utaqto SeniSvnebi; ra rjida, roca
uxeSad masxrobda imaze, ris masxrad agdebasac me ver vitan. o, rogorc me
mekumSeboda SigniT yvelaferi, roca sastikad meqceoda, aseve mas ekumSeba axla
guli, roca mixvda, rom Cvens Soris siyvaruli gaqra.
dedas naxevari Rame tirilSi gautarebia da TiTqmis ar uZinia. mama zedac
ar miyurebs, xolo Tu Semomxedavs, mis TvalebSi sayvedurs vkiTxulob: `rogor
SegiZlia aseTi boroti iyo da dedas amdeni tanjva miayeno~.
Cemgan bodiSis moxdas elian, me ki ar SemiZlia, radgan simarTle vTqvi
da dedas adre Tu gvian mainc unda gaego es ambavi. me mgonia, axla ufro
gulgrilad vitan dedis cremlebs da mamis sayvedurebiT savse mzeras. da
marTlac es asea. maT mxolod axla igrZnes is, rac me gamudmebiT mawuxebs.
SemiZlia TanavugrZno dedas, magram Cveni urTierTobis gamosworeba misi saqmea.
me dumils varCev, kvlav gulgrili viqnebi da simarTles ar SevuSindebi. jobs,
droze Tqva, rac saTqmelia.
ana
samSabaTi, 27 aprili, 1943
Zvirfaso kiwi!
yvela naCxubaria: me da deda, van daanebi da mama, deda da qalbatoni van
daani; yvela gabrazebulia erTmaneTze, sasiamovno atmosferoa, ara? anas
codvebis grZel sias kvlav ixilaven dawvrilebiT!
batoni voseni saavadmyofoSi dawva, batoni koophoisi ki ukve fexzea.
sabednierod, kuWidan sisxlis dena amjerad ufro swrafad SeuCeres, vidre amas
winaT. koophoisma gviambo, rom policiis samisamarTo biuro axlaxan momxdari
xanZris dros didad dazaralda. saxanZro razmma, nacvlad imisa, rom cecxli
Caeqro, mTeli Senoba wyliT aavso, ramac cecxlze meti ziani miayena am
dawesebulebas.
karlton-oteli mTlad daingra, cecxlgamCeni yumbarebiT datvirTulma
inglisis orma TviTmfrinavma swored am oficerTa klubze miitana ieriSi da
veicelstraate-zinelis mTeli kuTxe erTianad gadabuga.
RamRamobiT mosveneba aRar gvaqvs. uZilobisagan Tvalebi amomiRamda.
sakvebi gauaresda: sauzmeze gamxmari puri da yavis surogati, sadilad, ager
ukve ori kviraa, xan salaTa gvaqvs da xan ispanaxi, damatebiT oci santimetris
sigrZis mowiTalo da tkbili kartofili. visac gasuqebis eSinia, Cvens
TavSesafarSi unda gadmosaxldes. `zemourebi~ gauTaveblad wuwuneben, magram
Cven es ambavi tragediad ar migvaCnia.

yvela mamakacs, vinc xuTdRian omSi monawileobda, an mobilizebuli iyo,

iZaxeben, rogorc `samxedro tyves~, da germaniaSi agzavnian, rom
`fiurerisaTvis~ imuSaon. mokavSireTa jarebis gadmosxmis SemTxvevisaTvis axal
gamafrTxilebel zomebs mimarTaven!
ana
SabaTi, 1 maisi, 1943
Zvirfaso kiwi!
roca Cvens aqaur cxovrebaze vfiqrob, mudam im daskvnamde mivdivar, rom
im ebraelebTan SedarebiT, romelTac damalva ver moaxerxes, Cven samoTxeSi
vcxovrobT. miuxedavad amisa, odesme, roca aqaur cxovrebas gavixseneb, albaT,
gamikvirdeba, rogor daveSviT da CaviqnieT xeli bevr rameze. magaliTad, rac aq
varT, jer ar gamogvicvlia magidaze gadafarebuli muSamba da xSiri
xmarebisagan igi, cxadia, ukeTesi ar gamxdara. vcdilob sveli Cvris, Cvris ki
ara, ZonZis saSualebiT odnav mainc gavaprialo, magram bevrs verafers vaRwev.
van daanebma mTeli zamTris ganmavlobaSi ver moaxerxes gasarecxad miecaT
leibis pirebi, radgan sapnis fxvnili cotaa da arc varga. mama SemocveTili
SarvliT dadis, xolo halstuxi mTlad gaecrica. dedas korseti TiTqmis
daeSala, margo ki ori nomriT patara lifs atarebs. dedas da margos mTeli
zafxulis ganmavlobaSi sami perangi hqondaT, romelTac orive xmarobda, me ki
ise gavizarde, rom Cemi perangebi Wipamde mwvdeba. jer kidev ara gviSavs, magram
sasowarkveTili vfiqrob im droze, roca yvelaferi gagvicvdeba, dawyebuli Cemi
fexsacmlis lanCebidan, mamis gasasapni funjiT gaTavebuli. rogorRa
davubrundebiT Zvel mdgomareobas.
dRes isev saSineli srola atyda, gansakuTrebiT RamiT. me mTeli Cemi
avladideba SevaquCe da saWiro nivTebi dRisiT Cavalage `gasaqcev CemodanSi~,
magram dedam swori SeniSvna momca: `sad apireb gaqcevaso?~
mTel holandiaSi damsjeli razmebi daZrwian. yvelgan sabotaJia.
SemoRebulia saalyo mdgomareoba. yvelas daakles karaqis TiTo ulufa. ase
gaugonar bavSvebs sjian!
am saRamos dedas Tavi davbane. aq arc esaa ioli saqme. jer erTi, saponi
webovani da blantia, meorec, sqeli Tmis davarcxna dedas uWirs, radgan Cvens
saojaxo savarcxels aTi kbiliRa SerCa.
ane
samSabaTi, 18 maisi, 1943
Zvirfaso kiwi!
Cven Tvalyurs vadevnebdiT ingliselebisa da germanelebis sahaero
brZolas: samwuxarod, inglisis ori TviTmfrinavis ekipaJs paraSutiT
gadmoxtoma mouxda. Cvens merZeves, romelic harlemidan Sua gzaze cxovrobs,
oTxi kanadeli Sexvedria. erTi maTgani Turme Tavisuflad laparakobda
holandiurad da papirosis mosakideblad cecxli uTxovia. uTqvams, Cveni ekipaJi
eqvsi kacisagan Sedgeboda, sabralo piloti albaT daiwva, maTi meeqvse amxanagi
sadRac damalula. amasobaSi `mwvane~ policia movida da mfrinavebi daatyvevao.
ra saocaria aseTi simSvide da mxneoba, isic amgvari naxtomis Semdeg.
Tumca ukve Tbila, magram dRes mainc davanTeT Rumeli. davwviT
nafcqvenebi da nagavi. veridebiT damlageblebs da sanagve yuTSi arafers ar
vyriT. yoveli umniSvnelo daudevroba SeiZleba sabediswero aRmoCndes.
yvela studenti valdebulia xeli moaweros gancxadebas, rom
loialuradaa ganwyobili da saokupacio xelisulebis RonisZiebebs eTanxmeba.
mxolod amis Semdeg eZlevaT ufleba swavla ganagrZon, magram 80%-ma ar isurva
sakuTari sindisis winaaRmdeg wasvla da rwmeniT vaWroba. protests Sedegic
maSinve mohyva. yvela students, vinc xeli ar moawera gancxadebas, germaniaSi
gzavnian iZulebiT samuSaoze. Tu ase gagrZelda, raRa darCeba holandieli
axalgazrdobisagan?

Rame dedam fanjrebi daxura, kvlav autaneli srola iyo. me pimis sawols
Sevafare Tavi, uecrad gavigoneT, rogor gadmoxta sawolidan qalbatoni van
daani, TiTqos gvelma ukbinao, Semdeg Waxani mogvesma... me momeCvena, TiTqos
cecxlgamCeni yumbara pirdapir sawolTan Camovarda da avyvirdi: `Suqi, Suqi!!!~
pimma amomrTveli gadaatriala, megona sadacaa oTaxSi ali avardeba,
magram amis msgavsi araferi momxdara. yvelani zeviT avcvivdiT, gvindoda
gvenaxa, ra moxda. Turme van daanebs Ria fanjridan cecxlis anarekli
daunaxavT. qmars ufiqria, xanZari sadRac Cvens gverdiTaao, colma ki
gadawyvita, cecxli Cvens saxls ukidiao. roca Waxani gaisma, qalbatoni van
daani sawolidan wamovarda da mTeli taniT caxcaxebda. sanaxavi da gasagoni
aRaraferi iyo da Cven isev sawolebs davubrundiT. TxuTmeti wuTis Semdeg isev
agruxundnen qvemexebi. qalbatoni van daani im wamsve sawolidan wamovarda,
kibeebze Tavqve daeSva da duselTan Sevarda. etyoba, masTan eZebda mfarvelobas,
romelic sakuTarma qmarma ver aRmouCina.
duseli aseTi sityvebiT Seegeba: `daweqi Cem sawolSi, Cemo patarav!~
yvelas saSineli xarxari agvityda da amjerad SiSi gadagvaviwyda.
ane
kvira, 13 ivnisi, 1943
Zvirfaso kiwi!
mamam dabadebis dRes iseTi SesaniSnavi leqsi momiZRvna, rom ar SemiZlia
ar gagiziaro. jer imas ajamebs, rac gasul wels ganvicade, Semdeg ki
ganagrZobs:
Sen umcrosi xar ojaxSi
magram aRar xar patara,
SenTvis Znelia amdeni
Wkuis swavlebis atana;
suyvela imis cdaSia,
SegonebebiT gawamos,
rogorme, ramenairad
dagarigos da gaswavlos:
`SeiTviseo Cvengan!
Cven mogvbaZeo marto!
Cven ukeT viciT av-kargi,
gamocdilebi varTo!~
mZimea sxvisi Secdoma,
sakuTars vervin xedavs,
da fiqrob: saSvels mogcemdnen,
dagexsnebodnen netav!
sul cota, dReSi aTasi
SeniSvna giwevs, Svilo,
da yvela girCevs raRacas
maswavleblobas cdilobs,
zogSi iqneba styuian,
magram aRivse rwmeniT:
sjobs cxovrebaSi iaro
moTminebiTa SeniT;
damjeri iyav, bevri ram
Senc gijobs, yurad iRo,
tkbilsasurveli mSvidoba
Tu gsurs ojaxSi iyos...
ukanaskneli weli,
ukanaskneli xani
Sen Zalze wamoizarde
da aiyare tani;

bevri ikiTxe wigni,

kargi swavliT, da garjiT
ar gaikare mowyena
gulmxiaruli darCi;
Tumc, tansacmelze swuxar
da SekiTxvebiT gvavseb:
ra Cavicvao fexze?!
ra Cavicvao tanze?!
damimokldao kaba!
perangi Wipze mwvdeba!
fexsacmels nuRar ikiTxav
usaSveloda cvdeba...
saSinelia, mozards,
oriod gojze gazrdils,
tani da fexi pirdapir
aRaraferSi Cagdis!~1 (1 leqsebi Targmna murman lebaniZem.)
leqsi margomac dawera sxvadasxva saWmelze, magram riTmebi Zalze
moikoWlebs da amitom aq ar momyavs.
saerTod, bevri SesaniSnavi saCuqari miviRe. maT Soris sqeltaniani wigni,
elinuri da romauli miTologia, Cemi gatacebis sagani. arc tkbileuloba
damakles. yvelam Tavis xeluxlebel marags mimarTa. rogorc iatakqveSelTa
ojaxis yvelaze umcrosi naSieri, ufro metad gamanebivres, vidre vimsaxureb.
ana
samSabaTi, 15 ivnisi, 1943
Zvirfaso kiwi!
axali ambavi bevria, magram zogjer mgonia, rom Cemi mosawyeni titini
sakmaod mogbezrda da amgvari werilebis miReba aRar gainteresebs. amitom
mokled gadmogcem yvelafers. baton vosens kuWis operacia ar gaukeTes. eqimebma
gakveTes da kibo aRmoaCnda, romelic, samwuxarod, ise mosdeboda organizms,
rom operacia verafers uSvelida. amitom Wriloba daxures da sami kviris
mkurnalobis Semdeg gamoweres. Zalian mebraleba, gansakuTrebiT ki is mawuxebs,
rom gareT gamosvla ar SemiZlia, Torem xSirad vinaxulebdi da iqneb cotaTi
gamerTo. samwuxaroa, rom Cveni keTili voseni veRar mogviyveba, ra xdeba da
raze laparakoben sawyobSi. SesaniSnavad gviwyobda xels, misi zrunva
gulisamaCuyebeli iyo. Zalian gvaklia TvalSi.
momaval TveSi albaT radiomimRebis Cabareba mogviwevs, magram baton
koophoiss saxlSi `liliputi-mimRebi~ aqvs da, Cveni didi `filipisis~ nacvlad,
am patara aparats mogvitans. samwuxaroa aseTi mSvenieri radiomimRebis Cabareba,
magram TavSesafarSi, sadac ltolvilebi Sexiznulan, yovelgvari Tavgamodeba
saxifaToa da jobia, arafriT miviqcioT `xelisufalTa~ yuradReba. patara
radiomimRebs zeviT amoitanen. damalul ebraelebs, romlebic yvelafers Sav
bazarze yiduloben, akrZaluli radiomimRebic eqnebaT. yvela cdilobs sadme
iSovos Zveli radiomimRebi da sakuTaris nacvlad Caabaros. radio axla
erTaderTi kavSiria gare samyarosTan. roca ganwyobileba `down~1, (1 ecema
(ingl.).) eTeridan mosuli saocari xma gvSvelis, simxneves gvmatebs,
CagvCurCulebs: `aswieT Tavi, kvlavac dadgeba ukeTesi dro!~
ana
kvira, 11 ivlisi, 1943
Zvirfaso kiwi!
es ukve meramdenejer vfiqrob aRzrdaze. unda giTxra, rac SemiZlia
vcdilob dauzareli, damTmobi, maamebeli da keTili viyo, ase rom am bolo
dros sayvedurebisa da darigebebis niaRvarma iklo. magram araCveulebrivad
Znelia, kargad eqceode adamianebs, romelTac ver itan. amas ukeT maSin vaxerxeb,

roca vTvalTmaqcob da Zveleburad aRar vaxli yvelas pirSi simarTles (Tumc

amas aravin arafrad agdebs).
magram zogjer sakuTar Tavs ver verevi. yovelgvari usamarTloba
macofebs da Semdeg mTeli kvira gaiZaxian, ufro uzrdeli gogo qveyanaze ar
moiZebnebao. nuTu ar gecodebi? kidev kargi, rom sxvebiviT ar vwuwuneb, Torem
daZmarebul gunebaze viqnebodi da xalisiani ganwyobileba gamiqreboda.
gadavwyvite, droebiT xeli aviRo stenografiaze. jer erTi, meti dro
damrCeba sxva samuSaosaTvis, meorec, Tvalebi mtkiva. sakmaod arasasiamovno
ambavia. am bolo dros Zalian axlomxedveli gavxdi da saTvale mWirdeba
(albaT, bus davemsgavsebi), magram Sen xom ici, ris ufleba aqvs iatakqveSelebs,
an ukeT, ris ufleba ara aqvT...
yovel SemTxvevaSi, guSin saubris Tema mxolod Cemi saTvale iyo. dedam
gadawyvita, qalbaton koophoisTan erTad Tvalis eqimTan gamgzavnos. roca es
ambavi Sevityve, Tavbru damesxa. xumroba xom araa: quCaSi unda gavide,
warmogidgenia, quCaSi! pirvelad SiSisagan kinaRam movkvdi, mere ki gamexarda,
magram am saqmis ganxorcieleba arc ise advilia. jer yvelaferi unda agvewondagvewona, yovelgvari safrTxe da siZnele gagveTvaliswinebina, magram is
instanciebi, romelTac amgvari sakiTxebis gadawyveta evalebaT, male rodi
SeTanxmdnen. mips undoda, im wamsve waveyvane eqimTan, me kidec gamoviRe
karadidan Cemi nacrisferi palto, magram ise dammoklebia, TiTqos umcros das
eTxovebinos. cnobismoyvareobisagan aRar var, marTla wamiyvanen, Tu ara.
SeiZleba es ganzraxva gadaidos.
amas winaT ingliselebi siciliaSi gadmosxdnen da mama fiqrobs, rom omi
male damTavrdeba. eli me da margos Tavis gasakeTebel samuSaos gvaZlevs. Cven
siamovnebiT vuwevT am samsaxurs da elis saqmec ukeT midis. korespondenciebis
Cakereba da saSemosavlo wignis Sevseba yvelas SeuZlia, magram Cven amas ufro
keTilsindisierad vakeTebT.
mipi lamis welSi gawydes. mudam sasapalne cxeniviTaa datvirTuli.
TiTqmis yoveldRe Soulobs sadRac bostneuls, did CanTas gatenis da
velosipediT moaqvs CvenTan. zrunavs imazec, rom biblioTekidan yovel SabaTs
xuTi axali wigni gamoitanos. amitom yoveli SabaTis dadgomas im patara
bavSvebiviT veliT, romelTac ician, rom saCuqars miiReben. adamianebi,
romlebic normalurad cxovroben, verc ki warmoidgenen, ras niSnavs wigni
CvenTvis, gamomwyvdeulebisaTvis. kiTxva, mecadineoba da radio ai, mTeli
Cveni samyaro!
ana
samSabaTi, 13 ivlisi, 1943
Zvirfaso kiwi!
guSin nasadilevs, imis Semdeg, rac mamas nebarTva vTxove, dusels vkiTxe:
xom araferi eqneba sawinaaRmdego (zedmiwevniT zrdilobiani viyavi), kviraSi
orjer oTxidan eqvsis naxevramde Cvens oTaxSi dadgmuli magida gamoviyeno.
axla me mxolod samis naxevridan oTxamde vmuSaob am magidasTan, anu manamde,
sanam baton dusels sZinavs, Semdeg ki magida da oTaxi CemTvis akrZaluli
zonaa. nasadilevs saerTo oTaxSi iseTi xmauria, rom muSaoba SeuZlebelia,
garda amisa, zogjer mamasac sWirdeba Tavisi saweri magida. ase rom, moTxovna
sruliad safuZvliani iyo da SekiTxvas mxolod formaluri xasiaTi hqonda.
rogor fiqrob, ra mipasuxa didad ganswavlulma batonma duselma? `ara~ da
`ara~! aRvSfoTdi, ase advilad ver mogeSvebi, gavifiqre me da vkiTxe, ra
mizeziT meubneba uars. duselma civi wyali gadamasxa:
rogor ggonia, me ara maqvs samuSao? da Tu nasadilevs oTxis Semdeg
magida ar damiTmes, rodisRa unda vimuSao. me Cemi gegma maqvs da saqmes imitom
ki ar movkide xeli, rom ase ucbad mivagdo. Sen xom seriozuls arafers akeTeb!
ras warmoadgens Seni miTologia! muSaoba arc qsova da kiTxvaa. ara, magidas
ver dagiTmob! amaze laparakic zedmetia. me vupasuxe: Cemi samuSao me

seriozul saqmed mimaCnia. nasadilevs saerTo oTaxSi muSaoba miZneldeba,

amitom gTxovT, kidev erTxel dafiqrdeT-meTqi.
am sityvebis warmoTqmis Semdeg, Seuracxyofili ana Semobrunda da iseTi
gamometyveleba miiRo, TiTqos mis winaSe eqimi ki ara, araraoba yofiliyos.
brazmoreuls SigniT yvelaferi miduRda, duseli Zalze uzrdel adamianad
mimaCnda (da iyo kidec), Cemi Tavi ki zrdilobianad. saRamos, rogorc ki pimi
xelSi movigde, vuambe, ra Sedegi mohyva Cems Txovnas da movilaparakeT, rogor
movqceuliyavi. cxadia, me daTmoba ar mindoda da gadavwyvite, Tavad
momegvarebina es saqme. mamam daaxloebiT maswavla, saidan momevlo
duselisaTvis da mirCia, erTi dRe Semecada, radgan Zalze gacecxlebuli var.
magram rCeva yurad ar viRe da rogorc ki WurWeli davrecxe, maSinve
davudarajdi dusels. mama mezobel oTaxSi ijda da misi siaxlove gambedaobas
mmatebda.
batono dusel, vTqvi me, Cemi SekiTxva, albaT, Tqvens yuradRebas ar
imsaxurebs, magram me kidev erTxel gTxovT!
incidenti amowurulia, magram mzad var am Temaze gesaubro,
mipasuxa man uaRresad Tavaziani RimiliT.
Tumca igi waramara mawyvetinebda, me kidev erTxel gavumeore Cemi
mosazrebebi: batono eqimo, roca Tqven aq gadmobrZandiT, Cven zustad
SevTanxmdiT, vin ra dros isargeblebda oTaxiT, radgan oTaxi orives
gvekuTvnis. maSin davTqviT, rom sadilobamde imuSavebT Tqven, nasadilevs ki me,
magram mTel dros arc axla vTxoulob. dameTanxmeT, kviraSi ori saRamo bevri
araa da amis sruli ufleba maqvs.
duseli gvelnakbeniviT wamovarda.
uflebebze Sen saerTod ar unda laparakobde. sad mibrZaneb wasvlas?
sxva gza ar damrCenia, unda vTxovo baton van daans, iqneb rame saZaRlis
magvari amiSenos sxvenze. yovel SemTxvevaSi, adgili mainc meqneba CemTvis. aq
mSvidad muSaobis saSualebas ar maZleven, vxedav, Sen manamde ar moisveneb, sanam
gulze ar gaxeTqav kacs. Sen das margos rom eTxova, romelsac amisTvis meti
safuZveli aqvs, maSinve davuTmobdi, magram Sen... isev miTologias, qsovasa da
kiTxvas gadaswvda, ane Rrmad Seuracxyofili iyo, magram ar SeimCnia es da
kvlav duselis sayvedurebs ismenda: ra unda gelaparako. saSineli egoisti
xar. Sen oRond Seni gaitano da sul ar genaRvleba, sxvebs ra mouva. Cems
sicocxleSi ar minaxavs aseTi bavSvi! magram bolos da bolos unda dagiTmo,
Torem ityvian, ane franki imitom CaiWra gamocdaze, rom batoni duseli magidas
ar uTmobda da mecadineobis saSualebas ar aZlevdao.
laparakobda ganuwyvetliv, gauTaveblad, rogorc CanCqeri. aRar SemeZlo
mosmena. jer aseTma azrma gamielva: `kargi iqneba, ise Semovkra, rom es beberi
matyuara kedels gaekras~, Semdeg ki gavifiqre: `jobia davmSvidde, es tipi
amdeni nervebis moSlad ara Rirs~.
bolos, rogorc iqna, laparakiT guli ijera da, roca oTaxidan gavida,
misi saxe erTdroulad risxvas da triumfs gamoxatavda. rogorc yovelTvis,
jibeebi gamotenili hqonda produqtebiT, romelic mips Cumad mohqonda misTvis.
me mamasTan gavedi. mindoda yvelaferi meambna, magram, albaT, TviTon gaigona,
rac iTqva.
pimma gadawyvita, im saRamosve molaparakeboda dusels da asedac moiqca.
saubari naxevar saaTs gagrZelda. mamam dusels moagona, rom erTxel maT ukve
hqondaT laparaki am sakiTxze da maSin mxolod imitom dauTmo, rom ufrosi
umcrosTan ar gaemtyunebina, Tumca marTali arc maSin iyo. uecrad duselma
brZana, TiTqos me meTqvas, rom daukiTxavad SemoiWra CvenTan da cdilobs
yvelafers daepatronos. mamam gadaWriT uarhyo misi braldeba, radgan TviTon
gaigona yvelaferi da icoda, rom amaze krintic ar damiZravs. ai, ase daobdnen,
mama micavda, amtkicebda, rom egoisti ara var da Cemi samuSao sisulele araa,
duseli ki ukmayofilod buzRunebda da ilanZReboda. bolos daTmo. gadawyda,
rom kviraSi orjer xuT saaTamde magida Cems gankargulebaSi iqneba. amgvarad
duseli damarcxda. ori dRe zed ar miyurebda da sakuTari uflebebis

gansamtkiceblad suleli biWiviT iqceoda: zedmeti naxevari saaTi gangeb ijda

magidasTan.
Tu 54 wlis kaci aseTi pedanti da wvrilmania, etyoba, bunebas aseTi
gauCenia da aRarc Seicvleba.
ana
paraskevi, 16 ivlisi, 1943
Zvirfaso kiwi!
kviras isev gvestumrnen qurdebi, magram amjerad namdvili! rogorc
yovelTvis, diliT peteri sawyobSi Cavida da SeniSna, rom sawyobisa da quCis
karebi Riaa. im wamsve pimTan moirbina. pimi jer kabinetSi Sevida, germaniis
radiosadgurze momarTuli mimRebi gamorTo. kari Caketa, mere ki oriveni zeviT
amovidnen. aseT SemTxvevebSi Sinaganawesi gvikarnaxebs: ar mouSva wyali, daicavi
sruli siCume, rva saaTamde yvelaferi moaTave da sapirfareSoSi aRar Sexvide.
yvelas gvixaroda, rom Rame magrad gveZina da araferi gagvigonia. batoni
koophoisi mxolod Tormetis naxevarze movida da gviambo, rom qurdebs jer
quCis kari SemoumtvreviaT, mere ki sawyobis. sawyobSi bevri veraferi aRmoaCines
da gadawyvites bedi Semdeg sarTulze ecadaT. waiRes patara seifi, romelSic
40 guldeni da Seuvsebeli Cekis wignakebi iyo. magram yvelaze samwuxaro isaa,
rom Tan gahyvaT mTeli Cveni Saqris baraTebi, daaxloebiT 150 kg-is. batoni
koophoisi amtkicebs, rom es igive qurdebi iyvnen, romlebmac am 6 kviris winaT
karis Semomtvreva scades, magram ver moaxerxes. am axalma ambavma mTeli Cveni
TavSesafari kidev erTxel SeaSfoTa. etyoba, sensaciebis gareSe ar gvecxovreba.
kidev kargi, rom sabeWdi manqanebi da salaro yovel saRamos zeviT amoaqvT da
saimedod malaven Cvens karadaSi.
ana
orSabaTi, 19 ivlisi, 1943
Zvirfaso kiwi!
kviras amsterdam-nordi Zlier dabombes. iqauroba, albaT, saSinlad
dangreulia. mTeli quCebi RorRis grovebad iqca. didi dro dasWirdeba imaT
amoTxras, vinc nangrevebis qveS mohyva. ukve registrirebulia 200 mokluli da
uamravi daWrili. saavadmyofoebi gaWedilia. bavSvebi quCebSi daZrwian da
mSoblebs nangrevebis qveS eZeben. me axlac sisxli meyineba, roca maxsendeba
yru guguni da gruxuni, romelic ganadgurebis moaxloebas moaswavebda.
ana
paraskevi, 23 ivlisi, 1943
Zvirfaso kiwi!
elim kvlav ipova iseTi maRazia, sadac rveulebs da, rac mTavaria,
kontorisaTvis saWiro wignebs yidian. es wignebi margos sWirdeba, radgan am
bolo dros buxhalterias swavlobs. im maRaziaSi sxva rveulebic iyideba da
sasaqonlo baraTs ar Txouloben. magram xarisxze nurafers mkiTxav: qaRaldi
nacrisferia, xazebi damreci, sul raRac Tormeti gverdia da amave dros
usaSvelod Zviria.
axla ki minda cota gagarTo da giambo, Tu ris gakeTebas apirebs
TiToeuli Cvengani, upirveles yovlisa, roca aqaurobas gaecleba.
margo da batoni van daani Tbili wyliT piramde savse abazanaSi Cawvebian
da naxevar saaTs mainc inebivreben. qalbatoni van daani maSinve romelime
sakonditros miaSurebs da tortiT gamoZReba. dusels mxolod erTi survili
aqvs: naxos coli, Tavisi loTheni. dedas erTi finjani yava enatreba. mama
pirvel rigSi baton vosens inaxulebs. peteri qalaqSi gavardeba da kinos
naxavs. me ki?? bednierebisagan arc ki mecodineba, ra gavakeTo, riT daviwyo.
Cemi yvelaze didi survili isaa, rom kvlav Cvens saxlSi aRmovCnde, sadac
yvelafris gakeTeba SeiZleba. minda agreTve Tavisuflad viaro yvelgan, sadac

momesurveba, minda damexmaron, xelmZRvaneloba gamiwion swavlaSi, minda

wesierad davdiode skolaSi.
elis Sav bazarze xilis Sovna SeuZlia, magram fass nu ikiTxav. yurZeni 5
guldeni Rirs, xurtkmeli 70 centi, erTi atami 50 centi, 1 kg nesvi
gulden naxevari. gazeTSi ki yoveldRe msxvili asoebiT weren: fasebis zrda
gadamyidvelebis braliao.
ana
orSabaTi, 26 ivlisi, 1943
Zvirfaso kiwi!
guSindeli dRe iseTi mZime iyo, rom mosveneba davkargeT da jerac ver
davmSvidebulvarT. Tumca SegiZlia mkiTxo: Tu erT dRes mainc Cauvlia CvenTan
mSvidad. roca sahaero Tavdasxmis mauwyebeli sayvirebi awivldnen, Cven
vsauzmobdiT. jerjerobiT uSualo safrTxe ar gvemuqreboda, radgan
gamafrTxilebeli sayvirebi mxolod imas gvauwyebdnen, rom mtris Tvimfrinavebi
zRvis sanapiros uaxlovdebian. sauzmis Semdeg mivweqi. saSineli Tavis tkivili
mqonda. mogvianebiT Zirs Cavedi. daaxloebiT dRis ori saaTi iqneboda. samis
naxevarze margom kontoris saqmeebi moaTava. jer wignebic ar hqonda
alagebuli, roca isev atyda gangaSi, amjerad ukve namdvili. Cven kvlav zeviT
avediT da swored drozec. xuTi wuTis Semdeg iseTi saSineli gruxuni
mogvesma, rom derefnis kuTxeSi Cvens bombsafars mivaSureT. mTeli saxli
qanaobda, cxadad gvesmoda, rogor feTqdeboda yumbarebi. me Cemi `gasaqcevi
CanTa~ iRliis qveS amoviCare gaqcevis mizniT ki ara, mindoda rames CavWidebodi.
sul erTia, aqedan fexs ver movicvliT da Tu ukidures SemTxvevaSi mainc
mogviwevs gaqceva, quCa CvenTvis bombardirebaze nakleb saxifaTo araa.
naxevari saaTis Semdeg sahaero Tavdasxma Sewyda da Cvenebi
gamococxldnen. peteri sxvenidan, Tavisi sameTvalyureo punqtidan Camovida.
batoni duseli did kontoraSi yofila, qalbaton van daans yvelaze uSiSar
adgilad kabineti miuCnevia. batoni van daani ki samercxulidan uTvalTvalebda
sahaero Tavdasxmas. bolos yvelam zeviT moviyareT Tavi da navsadguris Tavze
cxadad davinaxeT kvamlis sqeli bolqvebi. male Cvenamde namwvis sunmac
moaRwia. ase gvegona, TiTqos qalaqs sqeli nisli daawva.
saSinelebaa aseTi didi xanZari. Cven kmayofilni viyaviT, rom CvenTvis
yvelaferi keTilad damTavrda da TiToeuli Tavis saqmes Seudga. vaxSmobisas
kvlav gaisma sahaero gangaSi! kerZi gemrieli gvqonda, magram sayvirebis wivilSi
mada damekarga. Tumca amjeradac araferi momxdara da TxuTmeti wuTis Semdeg
gangaSi Sewyda. atyda saSineli srola, Cveni saxlis Tavze uamravi
TviTmfrinavi Segrovda. TiToeuli fiqrobda: `RmerTo, es ukve metismetia~,
magram fiqri ras gviSvelida. wamovida yumbarebis wvima, axla ukve sxva mxares
(Sipholis1 (1 amsterdamis aeroporti.) Tavze), rogorc inglisis radiom
gviwinaswarmetyvela. mfrinavebi dabla eSvebodnen, maRla adiodnen, isrodnen,
haeri gugunebda. sul imis SiSi mqonda, rom TviTmfrinavs Camoagdebdnen.
unda gamogityde, rom saRamos 9 saaTze, roca dasaZineblad vemzadebodi,
fexze Zlivs videqi. Rame gamomeRviZa. zustad 12 saaTi iyo. isev TviTmfrinavebi.
duseli tanze ixdida, magram amas CemTvis mniSvneloba ar hqonda. rogorc ki
srola gaisma, sruliad gamofxizlebuli sawolidan wamovvardi. ori saaTis
ganmavlobaSi Tvimfrinavebi mouSoreblad dagvtrialebdnen Tavze da me
mamasTan davrCi. bolos srola Sewyda da isev Cems oTaxSi gadavbargdi. samis
naxevarze CameZina.
Svid saaTze gulgaxeTqili wamovvardi. van daani mamasTan iyo. yvelaferi
gavigone me. `qurdebi~, gamielva TavSi da megona, qurdebma yvelaferi waiRes.
magram ara! SesaniSnavi cnoba gadmouciaT, iseTi, rogoric didi xania, SeiZleba
mTeli omis manZilze ar mogvismenia. musolini gadadga, mmarTveloba italiis
mefem aiRo xelSi.
gvixaroda guSindeli saSinelebis Semdeg aseTi kargi ambavi da... imedi,
ganTavisuflebis imedi! mosalodneli mSvidobis imedi!

es wuTia, kraleri movida da gviTxra, fokeris1 (1 TviTmfrinavebis

mSenebeli germanuli firma.) qarxana TiTqmis sul daingrao. Rame kvlav gangaSi
atyda, uamravi TviTmfrinavi mofrinda. Semdeg isev sayvirebis gamafrTxilebeli
wivili. damaxrCo amdenma gangaSma. gamoZinebas ver vaswreb da wesierad
mecadineoba aRar SemiZlia. Zils mRelvarebac da imedic gvifrTxobs, iqneb
male, iqneb wels damTavrdes yvelaferi.
ana
xuTSabaTi. 29 ivlisi, 1943
Zvirfaso kiwi!
qalbatoni van daani, duseli da me WurWels vrecxavdiT. me Cumad viyavi,
rac iSviaTi movlenaa da maTac eniSnaT. cnobismoyvareTa mzera da zedmeti
kiTxvebi rom Tavidan amecilebina, saubrisaTvis Tavisufali Tema avirCie da
Sevexe wigns `henri zRvis napiridan~. magram angariSSi movtyuvdi. Tu qalbatoni
van daani ar Semomedaveba, duseli aucileblad gamoidebs Tavs. saqme ase iyo:
duselma sagangebod gvirCia aRniSnuli wigni. me da margom SesaniSnavi veraferi
vipoveT masSi. marTalia, Wabuki mSvenivradaa aRwerili, magram danarCeni...
jobia, gavCumde. me mxolod Cemi azri gamovTqvi da imwasve maxeSi gavebi. `Sen ra
gesmis mamakacis sulieri cxovrebis? bavSvze rom iyos laparaki, maSin
gasagebia! jer kidev patara xar aseTi wignebis sakiTxavad. amis gageba zogierTs
oci wlis asakSic ki uWirs~. (Tu asea, ratomRa gvirCia ase saguldagulod misi
wakiTxva me da margos?). uecrad orivem aiwyvita!
`Sen Zalze bevri ram ici, risi codnac SenTvis jer adrea. cudad
gzrdian. gaizrdebi da veraferSi ver hpoveb sixaruls da siamovnebas. maSin ki
ityvi: ah, aseTi rame me ukve 25 wlis winaT wavikiTxe wignSi. Tu gaTxovebas
apireb, an guliT ginda Seiyvaro vinme iCqare! mere aRaravin mogewoneba.
Teoriulad yvelaferi ici, magram praqtikulad yovelive es sul sxvagvarad
gamoiyureba~.
maT iqneb hgoniaT, rom kargi aRzrda Svilis mSoblebis winaaRmdeg
amxedrebaa, rasac didi siamovnebiT akeTeben kidec. aseTive brwyinvale meTodia
isic, rom Cemi xnis gogonebs `mozrdilTa~ Temaze ar esaubro, magram aseTi
aRzrda xSirad saSinel Sedegebs iwvevs!
amgvari sasacilo manWva-grexisaTvis orives didi siamovnebiT gavawnidi
silas. ise gavmwardi, rom Tavi aRar maxsovda. netav, rac SeiZleba male
gavecalo maT. qalbatoni van daani namdvili... ai, visgan unda aiRo magaliTi!
diax, magaliTi imisa, rogoric araviTar SemTxvevaSi ar unda iyo!
mas yvela icnobs, icnobs rogorc utifars, egoists. vireSmakas, Zunwsa da
yvelafriT ukmayofilos. am qalbatonze SemiZlia tomebi davwero da, vin icis,
iqneb davwero kidec. misi garegnuli bzinva male xundeba, misi Tavazianoba da
alersi, rasac gansakuTrebiT mamakacebis mimarT iCens, yalbia. dedas imdenad
sulelad miaCnia, rom misTvis sityvebs ar imetebs, margo araraobad Tvlis, pimi
ki ambobs, maxinjiao (rogorc pirdapiri, aseve gadataniTi mniSvnelobiT). me
mikerZoeba ar mCvevia, magram xangrZlivi dakvirvebebis Semdeg im daskvnamde
mivedi, rom yvela Tvalsazrisi sworia da igi aTasjer uaresia. imdeni cudi
mxare aqvs, rom ar ici, riT daiwyo?
ana
P. S. Zvirfas mkiTxvels vTxov gaiTvaliswinos is, rom es werili cxel
gulze davwere.
samSabaTi, 3 agvisto, 1943
Zvirfaso kiwi!
politikuri ambebi kargad midis. italiaSi faSistebis partia akrZales.
sxvadasxva raionSi faSistebis winaaRmdeg xalxi aRdga, am brZolaSi
jariskacebic ki monawileoben. rogorRa SeuZlia am xalxs, ingliselebs eomos?
aqauroba ukve mesamed Zlierad dabombes. kriWaSekruli vamxnevebdi
sakuTar Tavs. qalbatoni van daani, romelic aqamde gaiZaxoda: `dausrulebel

lodins yvelaze saSineli dasasruli jobso~, Cvens Soris yvelaze laCaria. am

diliT verxvis foToliviT TrToda, Semdeg ki cremlebi waskda. col-qmari
mTeli kviris ganmavlobaSi ZaRli da katasaviT Wamdnen erTmaneTs da axlaxan
Serigdnen. qmari alersianad amSvidebda cols. am didebuli scenis Semyures
SeiZleboda guli aCuyeboda.
kataze gamaxsenda. muSim daamtkica, rom katas marto sargebloba ar
moaqvs! yvelas rwyilebi dagvesia da Cveni wameba TandaTan Zlierdeba. batonma
koophoisma yvelafers daayara yviTeli fxvnili, magram etyoba, rwyilebs
arafers vnebs. yvelas dagvawyda nervebi. yvelgan rwyili melandeba, yvelaferi
mefxaneba, xan xeli, xan fexi. xan sxeulis sxva nawili. yvela igrixeba,
sasacilo pozas Rebulobs, cdilobs patara mwamebeli daiWiros. amave dros
sxeulis umniSvnelo moZraobac ki mtkivneulia, Cven gavxevdiT, radganac Zalian
cotas vvarjiSobT da amave dros Tavs ar vuvliT.
ana
oTxSabaTi, 4 agvisto, 1943
Zvirfaso kiwi!
mas Semdeg, rac am TavSesafarSi varT gamoketilebi, erT welze meti
gavida. Sen ukve sakmaod bevri ram ici Cvens cxovrebaze. zogi ram Zneli
gadmosacemia. aq yvelaferi Zalze rTuli da sul sxvagvaria, vidre gareT,
magram sruli warmodgena rom Segeqmnas, drodadro rames mogiyvebi Cveni
cxovrebidan. daviwyeb imiT, Tu rogor vatarebT saRamos da Rames.
saRamos cxra saaTze iwyeba gacxovelebuli Zilis wina samzadisi:
skamebis midgma-modgma, sabnebisa da baliSebis gadmolageba, loginebis gaSla.
im adgilas, sadac dRisiT yvelaferi es awyvia, aRaraferi rCeba. me mZinavs
patara Sezlongze, romlis sigrZe daaxloebiT metrnaxevaria, da romlis
dasagrZeleblad skamebia saWiro. dRisiT Cemi pliumo, sabani, baliSi da zewari
duselis sawolze alagia.
gverdiTi oTaxidan ismis damaxasiaTebeli Wriali da WraWuni: margo
Tavis dasakec sawols Slis da saidanRac sabnebi da baliSebi amoaqvs.
Tu ar ici, rom qalbatoni van daanis sawols fanjrisken miaTreven,
SeiZleba ifiqro, zeviT quxso. vardisfer Ramis perangSi gamowyobilma `misma
udidebulesobam~ fanjarasTan unda daiZinos da axlo manZilidan isunTqos
sufTa ozoni Tavisi lamazi, patara cxviriT! saaTis cxraze, roca peteri
dabanas morCeba, `saabazanoSi~ mivdivar da saguldagulod viban. xSirad Cemi
banaoba romelime rwyils sicocxlis fasad ujdeba. Semdeg vixexav kbilebs,
vixvev kululebs, viwmend frCxilebs da vewevi sxva wvrilman saqmianobas, rac
saidumloebaa... yvelaferi es naxevar saaTSi unda movaswro.
aTis naxevari: sabanao xalaTs vicvam. cal xelSi saponi miWiravs, meoreSi
Tmis samagrebi, bigudebi, bamba, iRliaSi sacvlebi maqvs amoCrili da gavrbivar.
magram xSirad ukan mabruneben, radgan pirsabani Cemi mSvenieri Savi TmiT
damimSvenebia, rac Cems momdevnos maincdamainc ar moswons.
aTi saaTi: vuSvebT SuqsaniRbav fardebs. Zili nebisa! TxuTmeti wuTis
Semdeg ismis sawolis Wriali da damtvreuli, moSlili zambarebis kvnesa.
bolos, Tu zeviTa wyvili ar daobs, siCume mkvidrdeba.
Tormetis naxevari: iReba `saabazanos~ kari da iatakze sinaTlis viwro
zoli wveba. ismis fexsacmlis flatuni. gamocxaddeba uzomod grZel xalaTSi
gaxveuli duseli, romelic aqamde kraleris kontoraSi muSaobda. aTiode wuTi
oTaxSi daflatunobs, qaRaldebs aSrialebs, sakvebs inaxavs, saqmianad Slis
logins, mere mcire xniT isev ikargeba, sapirfareSodan ki drodadro saeWvo
xmebi ismis.
sami saaTi: patara saqmis gamo, Cveulebriv, adgoma mixdeba. Tunuqis
kolofs, romelsac am mizniT viyeneb, qveS dafenili aqvs fexsafenis naWeri im
SemTxvevisaTvis, Tu Jonvas daiwyebs. vcdilob, sunTqva Sevikavo, Tunuqis
kolofi ki ise xmaurobs, TiTqos kenWebze wyaro mirakrakebs. amis Semdeg TeTr

perangSi gaxveuli arseba (margos mudmivi dacinvis sagani `ras gavxar am

Ramis perangSi!~) kvlav sawolSi miZvreba.
TxuTmetiode wuTi isev Ramis xmaurs vusmen, jer erTi, qurdebi xom ar
Semoparulan, meorec, ras akeTeben Cemi yovelmxriv ganlagebuli mezoblebi.
aqedan advilad SegiZlia daaskvna, Tu ra temperamentis adamiania TiToeuli
maTgani. zogs magra sZinavs, zogi Zilfxizlobs; Zalze usiamoa, roca batoni
duseli Zilfxizlobs. jer ismis SesunTqva, TiTqos Tevzi gaWirvebiT ylapavs
haers da ase aTjer mainc, mere enis wklapuniT tuCebs isvelebs, brunavs,
borgavs, baliSs awvalebs da ase grZeldeba manamde, sanam myudrod ar
moikalaTebs. mTeli es procedura mcire SesvenebiT samjer mainc meordeba.
bolos batoni eqimi Zils miecema.
RamiT, pirvelsa da oTx saaTs Soris, xSirad ismis sazenito qvemexebis
srola. jer ver gamigia, ra moxda da mainc naxevrad gamofxizlebuli ukve
vdgavar Cemi sawolis gverdiT. zogjer mesizmreba uweso zmnebi da Cems zeviT
mcxovrebi col-qmris Cxubi. aseT SemTxvevaSi mogvianebiT vxvdebi, rom kargad
meZina da srolis xma gamomepara, magram ufro xSirad sawolidan wamovvardebi,
baliSs da cxvirsaxocs xalaTSi vaxvev da fostlebSi fexgayrili mfarvelobis
saZieblad mamasTan gavrbivar. es margom Cemi dabadebis dRis aRsaniSnavad
daweril leqsSi ase gamoxata:
rogorc ki RamiT gangaSi tydeba
da qvemexebis grgvinva mogoravs,
gulgaxeTqili wamovardeba
da mamis sawols eZebs gogona.
Tu saSineli srola araa, sanam mamasTan var, pirvel SiSs vZlev.
Svids rom TxuTmeti aklia: wkrrr, zeviT maRviZara saaTma daiwkriala.
qalbatonma van daanma saaTi gaaCera. qmari dgeba. gvesmis misi xma, igi wyals
uSvebs da pirveli Sedis `saabazano~ oTaxSi. naxevari saaTis Semdeg mas duseli
cvlis. rogorc iqna, marto davrCi. vdgebi, fardebs vxsni da TavSesafarSi
axali dRe iwyeba.
ane
xuTSabaTi, 5 agvisto, 1943
Zvirfaso kiwi!
dRes unda giambo, ra xdeba CvenTan, roca kontoris mosamsaxureebi
Sesvenebis dros sasadilod amodian.
pirvelis naxevari: Cvenma virTxebis sorom Tavisuflad amoisunTqa.
damlageblebi wavidnen. zevidan mtversasrutis xmauri ismis. qalbatoni van
daani gulmodgined wmends Zvirfas `nivTs~ xaliCas. iRliaSi wignebamoCrili
margo odnav gonebaClung mowafesTan, duselTan modis, romelic Znelad
iTvisebs holandiurs. pims Zalian uyvars dikensi da myudro kuTxes eZebs, raTa
kiTxviT datkbes. deda zeviT mieSureba, rom niadag mofusfuse diasaxliss
moexmaros. me ki `saabazano~ oTaxSi Sevdivar, saWiroa, iqauroba mivalago da
Tavi odnav wesrigSi moviyvano.
pirvels TxuTmeti aklia: rigrigobiT Semodian stumrebi: van santeni,
batoni koophoisi an kraleri, eli da xSirad mipic.
pirveli saaTi: sulganabuli vusmenT bi-bi-sis gadacemas. esaa erTaderTi
dro, roca Cveni TavSesafris binadarni ar daoben, radgan iseTi vinme
laparakobs, visac batoni van daanic ki ver Seubrunebs sityvas.
oris TxuTmeti wuTi: meored sauzmis droa. TiToeuli Rebulobs erT
finjan wvnians da, Tu gvaqvs, raime Sesatanebelsac. henk van santeni kmayofili
zis savarZelSi, xelSi gazeTi uWiravs, gverdiT kata uzis, win ki wvniani kerZi
udgas. yovelive es simyudrovis aucilebeli atributebia. batoni koophoisi
gviambobs, ra xdeba qalaqSi. informaciis SesaniSnavi wyaroa. kibeze bakabukiT
amorbis kraleri, karebze ramdenjerme akakunebs, Semdeg Semodis da xelebs

ifSvnets. xan karg xasiaTzea, mxiaruli gamometyveleba aqvs, xanac

damwuxrebuli saxe aqvs da dums, gaaCnia, ra gunebaganwyobilebazea.
ors TxuTmeti aklia: stumrebi gvemSvidobebian: yvela Tavis saqmes
ubrundeba. deda da margo WurWels recxaven. batoni da qalbatoni van daanebi
dasaZineblad midian, peteri Tavis oTaxSi imaleba, mama wveba, unda cotaTi
Tvali moatyuos, duselic amas apirebs, me ki vwer da vkiTxulob. saukeTeso
droa, yvelas sZinavs. xels aravin miSlis.
dusels saxeze vamCnev, rom gemrieli saWmeli esizmreba, magram didxans
sacqerad ar mcalia. dro Cqara gadis da rogorc ki xuTs erTi wuTi
gadascdeba, es pedanti kaci Tavze damadgeba da ukmayofilo gamometyvelebiT
momTxovs, magida gavuTavisuflo.
ana
SabaTi, 7 agvisto, 1943
Zvirfaso kiwi!
Cveni cxovrebis aRwera droebiT unda Sevwyvito. am ramdenime kviris
winaT moTxrobis wera daviwye, raRacas vTxzav da es imden sixaruls maniWebs,
rom `Cemi kalmis naSierni~ sakmaod momravldnen. radgan dagpirdi, rom Cemi
gancdebis Sesaxeb yvelafers gulwrfelad da patiosnad giambob. minda vicode:
rogor ggonia, moewonebaT Cemi moTxrobebi bavSvebs?
fiso
fiso Cveni mezoblis gogonas hqvia. karg amindSi fanjridan vxedav,
rogor TamaSobs baRSi. kviraobiT fisos Rvinisferi xaverdis kaba acvia, sxva
dReebSi ki Salis lurji kaba. fisos aqvs qera, magrad dawnuli, ganze
gaSverili nawnavebi da lurji Suqmfeni Tvalebi. deda SesaniSnavi hyavs, mama ki
ara hyavs. fisos deda mrecxavia, dRisiT xSirad exmareba ojaxis diasaxlisebs,
romelTac mTeli saxli aqvT dasalagebeli, saRamos sxvis sarecxs recxavs da
mere ki daRamebamde TeTreuls fens, sabnebs ferTxavs da tansacmels wmends.
fisos hyavs eqvsi da-Zma. yvelaze patara mtiralaa da, roca deda
bavSvebs dasaZineblad eZaxis, dis kalTas efareba. hyavs agreTve zangiviT Savi
kata, romelsac kargad uvlis da yovel saRamos eZaxis: `fiso, fisunia, fiso,
fiso, fiso!~ amitomac daarqves fiso. sinamdvileSi, albaT, sxva saxeli hqvia,
magram Serqmeuli saxeli yvelaze metad uxdeba, garda amisa, hyavs ori baWia,
erTi TeTri, meore yavisferi. skup, skup, sasacilod daxtian baWiebi ezoSi,
zogjer ki saxlis zRurblamdec midian. xandaxan fiso sxva bavSvebiviT cudad
iqceva, magram es mxolod maSin xdeba, roca ZmebTan Cxubi mouva. o, ra saSineli
gabrazeba icis am dros, icemeba, wixlebs isvris, ikbineba kidec! magram Cxubi
didxans ar grZeldeba. Zmebi Ronier das eridebian. `fiso, gaiqeci maRaziaSi!~,
dauZaxebs zogjer deda, magram fiso yurebs TiTebiT icobs, Semdeg ki dedas
eubneba, araferi gamigoniao da arc tyuis. fisos Wiris dResaviT ejavreba
raimes sayidlad wasvla. magram arc tyuilis Tqma uyvars. fiso arasodes ar
tyuis. mis lurj TvalebSic Cans. fisos ufrosi Zma, peteri, Teqvsmeti wlisaa,
da Segirdad muSaobs. mas Tavis Tavze didi warmodgena aqvs da umcrosebs
mbrZaneblurad eqceva. mas fisoc ki verafers ubedavs, radgan sakuTari
gamocdilebiT icis, ra ficxia, Tumca isic icis, rom Tu gamgoni iqneba, Zma
kanfets miscems. tkbileuloba ki fisosac Zalian uyvars da, cxadia,
umcrosebsac.
kviraobiT, roca zarebis Zlieri, sazeimo rekva xalxs salocavad uxmobs,
fiso dedasTan da patarebTan erTad eklesiaSi midis. fiso jer zecaSi myof
mamas avedrebs RmerTs, Semdeg ki dedas, da sTxovs janmrTelad amyofos. mere
yvelani saseirnod midian. fiso mouTmenlad elodeba kvira dRes da seirnobs.
midian parkSi, zogjer zooparkSic, Tumca zooparkSi seqtemberSi dadian, roca
bileTi ufro iafi Rirs. fisos dabadebis dResac SeuZlia zooparkSi wasvla.
es misi saCuqari iqneba, radgan Zvirfasi saCuqrisaTvis dedas fuli ar yofnis.
zogjer, mZime muSaobis Semdeg, deda daRlilia da tiris, magram fiso mas

anugeSebs da pirdeba yvelafers, razedac TviTon ocnebobs. Zalian unda male

gaizardos, fuli iSovos da TavisTvis kabebis, xolo patarebisaTvis peteriviT
tkbileulobis yidva SeZlos, amisTvis ki bevri unda iswavlos da didxans
iaros skolaSi. deda apirebs meojaxeobis skolaSi miabaros, magram fisos
araviTari survili ara aqvs. ar wava mosamsaxured. urCevnia fabrikaSi imuSaos,
im mSvenieri gogonebis msgavsad, romlebic yoveldRe maTi saxlis win dadian.
fabrikaSi uamravi xalxia. xmis gamcemi mudam eyoleba. fisos musaifi uyvars.
marTalia, igi kargad swavlobs, magram skolaSi zogjer kuTxeSi ayeneben,
radgan ena ver gauCerebia. maswavlebeli Zalian uyvars. metismetad Wkviani da
lamazia. saSinlad Znelia gaxde iseTi, rogoric maswavlebelia, magram SeiZleba
momavalSi cotaTi mainc daemsgavsos. deda eubneba, bevri ram Tu ar gecodineba,
ver gaTxovdebio, rac mas ar moswons. fisos guliT unda bavSvebi hyavdes,
magram ara iseTi, rogoric misi umcrosi debi da Zmebia, aramed ufro lamazi,
ufro mimzidveli. mis bavSvebs mSvenieri wablisferi kululebi eqnebaT,
rogorc keTilSobilebs Seefereba da ara qera. araviTari Worfli, fisos
mTeli saxe WorfliT aqvs dafaruli. mas arc imdeni bavSvi eyoleba, ramdenic
dedas hyavs, ori an sami kmara; magram jer kidev bevri unda icados, orjer meti
xnis unda gaxdes! `fiso~, eZaxis deda, `aba Cqara daiZine! sad xar aqamde? isev
ocnebebma gagitaca!~.
fiso Cumad oxravs... ra kargia momavalze ocneba!..
katrinte
katrinte glexkacis saxlis win did lodze mzeSi ijda da daZabuli
fiqrobda. Cumi, winsafarafarebuli gogona aravis ar eubneboda, raze fiqrobda,
aravis ar uziarebda gulisnadebs, radgan Zalze uSno da gulCaTxrobili iyo.
megobrebi ar hyavda, albaT verc iSovida. deda ucnaur bavSvad Tvlida,
TviTonac grZnobda, rom sxva bavSvebs ar hgavs. mamamiss, namdvil glexs, bevri
saqme hqonda da erTaderTi qaliSvilisaTvis ver iclida. amgvarad, katrinte
sakuTari Tavis anabara iyo. martooba mas ar awuxebda, miCveuli iyo.
magram zafxulis am mSvenier saRamos, roca Tavi aswia da mindvrebs
gaxeda, mZimed amoioxra. ra kargia albaT tolebTan TamaSi! rogor darbian,
icinian, rogor mxiaruloben, ufro da ufro axlos modian... ra undaT Cemgan? o,
ra borotebi arian, imisTvis mividnen, rom abuCad aigdon. garkveviT esmis,
rogor eZaxian metsaxels: `dondlo, dondlo!~. o, rogor ezizReba mas es
saxeli! isini ki sul ufro xmamaRla yvirian! o, ra ubeduria! saxlSi Sesvla
mainc SeeZlos, magram maSin sul aRar moasveneben... sabralo gogona, es
SemTxveva ukanaskneli rodia, jer kidev bevrjer igrZnob martoobas cxovrebaSi
da bevrjer SegSurdeba sxva gogonebis!
katrinte, Semodi saxlSi, sadilobis droa! katrintem Rrmad
amoioxra da wamodga. urCobas ver ubedavda dedas.
Sexede erTi, ra kmayofili saxe aqvs Cvens qaliSvils, ra mxiaruli
bavSvia! wamoiZaxa dedamisma, roca Cveulebrivze ufro moRuSuli katrinte
nela Sevida oTaxSi.
ra dagemarTa, damunjdi? uyvira dedam, misi xma ufro uxeSi da
mkacri iyo, vidre undoda, magram misi qaliSvilic naklebad hgavda im mxiarul
da sicocxliT savse bavSvs, romelzedac ocnebobda.
gismen, deda, Zlivs gasagonad Tqva gogonam.
raRa miWirs. mTeli dRe sadRac daeTrevi, arafris maqnisi ara xar! sad
iyavi aqamde?
aqve, maxloblad. katrintes iseTi grZnoba hqonda, TiTqos yelSi
xeli wauWires. bavSvis dabnevam deda daaeWva da meti cnobismoyvareobiT dauwyo
gamokiTxva: garkveviT miTxari, sad iyavi, minda vicode, sad daeTreodi, gaige?
o, ra dondloa, amis atana SeuZlebelia! rogorc ki dedam saZulveli
metsaxeli warmoTqva, katrintem Tavi veRar Seikava da mwared atirda.

 ra iyo, ra moxda? vis hgavs aseTi mxdali! ar SeiZleba pirdapir

miTxra, sad daeTreodi, iqneb saidumloa?
magram gogonas arafris Tqma ar SeeZlo, radgan cremlebi axrCobda.
uecrad wamoxta, skami gadaayirava da tiriliT sxvenze avarda. kuTxeSi
tomrebze damxobili didxans qviTinebda gulamoskvnili... dedamiss Svilis
saqcieli ar gakvirvebia, mxrebi aiCeCa da sufra aalaga. misi qaliSvili xSirad
iqceoda ase sulelurad da jobda, yuradReba ar mieqcia. sul erTia, misgan
mainc verafers gaigebs, cremlis RvraSi ki badali ara hyavs. rogor SeiZleba,
Tormeti wlis glexis gogo aseTi iyos!
katrinte sxvenze odnav damSvidda da Cafiqrda. undoda, dabla Casuliyo,
dedisTvis eTqva, qvaze vijeqio da moeTavebina is saqme, romelsac aqamde Tavi
ver gaarTva. deda darwmundeboda, rom uqnara araa. Tu deda hkiTxavs, ratom
ijda mTeli dRe usaqmod qvaze, etyvis, rom erTi mniSvnelovani sakiTxi unda
gadaewyvita. saRamos, roca kvercxebs waiRebs gasayidad, dedas axal saTiTes
uyidis, lamaz vercxlis saTiTes, romelic didebulad brwyinavs. amdeni fuli
ki aqvs. maSin deda darwmundeba, rom igi dondlo araa. katrinte kvlav
Cafiqrda, fiqrobda, rogor moecilebina saZulveli metsaxeli da aseTi azri
daebada: fuliT, romelic saTiTis yidvis Semdeg morCeba, erT park kanfets
iyidis da xval skolaSi gogonebs daurigebs. maSin masac daimegobreben,
eTamaSebian. yvela darwmundeba, rom masac SeuZlia TamaSi da metsaxels aRar
dauZaxeben. katrinte moridebiT Camovida dabla, magram derefanSi deda daxvda
da hkiTxa: `SegaSra cremlebi?~ katrintem xmis amoReba ver gabeda, ver auxsna,
sad iyo am diliT; nacvlad amisa, saCqarod Seudga fanjrebis wmendas, undoda,
daRamebamde moeswro.
mze Cadioda, roca katrintem xelSi kvercxebiT savse kalaTa aiRo da
gzas gaudga. naxevari saaTi irbina, bolos pirvel myidvelamde miaRwia,
romelic aivanze idga da xelSi faifuris WurWeli eWira.
`momeci, geTayva, 10 cali~, alersianad uTxra qalma. katrintem kvercxebi
CauTvala, gamoemSvidoba da gza ganagrZo. sam meoTxed saaTSi misi kalaTa
dacarielda. katrinte Sevida maRaziaSi, sadac sxvadasxva saqonels yiddnen.
lamazi saTiTe da mTeli parki kanfetebi kalaTaSi Cado da ukan gamobrunda.
jer Sua gzac ar eqneboda gavlili, rom Soridan dainaxa is ori gogona,
romlebic am diliT dascinodnen. yvelafers erCia sadme damaluliyo, magram
gulSekumSulma mainc ganagrZo gza.
`Sexede, vin modis, dondlo, dondlo, WkuaTxeli~. katrinte SiSisagan
gafiTrda. saqcielwamxdarma da sasowarkveTilma gogonebs mTeli parki kanfeti
gauwoda. erT-erTma maTganma parki xelidan gamostaca da gaiqca, magram sanam
mosaxvevSi miimaleboda, ukan Semobrunda da katrintes ena gamouyo.
dardis, umweobisa da martooobisagan guldamwvari katrinte iqve gzis
piras balaxebSi Caemxo da tiroda, tiroda daRamebamde, sanam Zal-Rone ar
gamoecala. bolos wamodga, gadabrunebuli kalaTa aiRo da saxlisken gaswia...
balaxebSi ki vercxlis saTiTe brwyinavda.
ana
orSabaTi, 9 agvisto, 1943
Zvirfaso kiwi!
vagrZeleb Cveni yoveldRiuri cxovrebis aRweras.
sadili: kerZs pirvelad baton van daans miarTmeven xolme da Tu moewona,
blomadac gadaiRebs. yvelas elaparakeba, yvelaferSi ereva, yvelaferze Tavis
azrs gamoTqvams, xolo Tu rames ityvis, veRar gadaaTqmevineb. brali misi, vinc
mas SeekamaTeba. katasaviT Cxavis da Tu kacma erTxel ukve iwvnia aseTi
siamovneba, meorejer frTxilad iqneba. misi Tvalsazrisi yvelaze sworia!
yvelaferi yvelaze ukeT icis! marTalia, mas bevri ram unaxavs cxovrebaSi, amas
ra jobia, magram saocrad qedmaRalia.
qalbatoni van daani: jobia, gavCumde. kargi iqneboda, sul ar vxvdebode,
gansakuTrebiT, roca ugunebod brZandeba. yovelgvari dava da kamaTi misi

bralia, oRond ar gegonos, TviTon daobdes an kamaTobdes. masTan davas yvela

erideba, igi mxolod wamqezebelia. misi xeloba sxvisi wakidebaa! umTavresad ki,
qalbatoni frankisa da anesi. mamasa da margos ase advilad ver miudgeba, sababs
ar aZleven.
qalbatoni van daani arc sufraze ibneva, Tumca darwmunebulia, rom
Cagraven, yvelaze dabrawuli kartofili me, yvelaze gemrieli lukma me,
yvelaferi, rac gemrielia, me-o, ai, misi devizi. amave dros enas ar aCerebs.
misTvis sul erTia, usmenen Tu ara, ainteresebs vinmes misi azri Tu ara. igi
darwmunebulia, rom yoveli misi sityva oqrod Rirs da yvelas did siamovnebas
aniWebs.
keklucad iRimeba, ise iqceva, TiTqos yvelaferi icis. yvelas rCevadarigebas aZlevs, yvelas erTgvar dedur mzrunvelobas uwevs da ase hgonia,
yvela moxiblulia misiT. sinamdvileSi ki dids arafers warmoadgens.
pirveli Sromismoyvareoba, meore mxiaruli xasiaTi, mesame
keklucoba da amasTan erTad sikoxtave da Tavis movla uyvars. ai aseTia
petronela van daani.
sufris mesame wevri: misi xma TiTqmis ar ismis. batoni van daani-umcrosi
metwilad Cumadaa da aravis yuradRebas ar aqcevs.
misi kuWi namdvili danaidebis kasria. sadilis Semdeg, roca uamrav
saWmels gadasanslavs, seriozuli gamometyvelebiT amtkicebs, erT amdens kidev
SevWamdio.
sufris meoTxe wevria margo: cotas laparakobs da CitiviT ikenkeba.
erTaderTi, rasac igi ase Tu ise miirTmevs, bostneuli da xilia. van daanebis
azriT, `ganebivrebulia~, Cven ki vfiqrobT, rom `haeri da moZraoba aklia~.
sufris Semdegi wevria deda: kargad Wams, laparakobs bevrs da
xalisianad. masze aravin ar ityvis: ai, am saxlis diasaxlisi, ris xazgasmac ase
uyvars sakuTari Tavis mimarT qalbaton van daans. riT gansxvavdebian isini?
qalbatoni sadils amzadebs, deda ki qvabebs xexavs da WurWels recxavs.
meeqvse da meSvide wevri: mamaze da sakuTar Tavze bevrs arafers vityvi.
pimi yvelaze moridebulia, pirvelad imas uyurebs, sxvebs Tu eyofao. mamas
arasodes araferi ar unda. Tu raime kargia, bavSvebs. pimi sikeTisa da
didsulovnebis gansaxierebaa, xolo mis gverdiT vzivar me, Cveni TavSesafris
namdvili nervebis kona.
eqimi duseli: kerZs ise gadmoiRebs rom arc ki daxedavs. miirTmevs uxmod.
magram Tu saubari aucilebelia, ki batono, oRond laparakobs mxolod
saWmelze. yovel SemTxvevaSi es Tema konfliqtebs mainc ar iwvevs, SeiZleba
vinmem cota waitrabaxos, esaa da es. Wama SeuZlia uzomod, araferze ar ambobs
uars, sul erTia, moswons Tu ara. Sarvals metismetad maRla iwevs, acvia
wiTeli qurTuki da Savi fostlebi, cxvirs muqi rqis CarCoebiani saTvale
umSvenebs. aseTia yvelgan: samuSao magidasTan, sufraze, dasasveneblad
wamowolili da maSinac ki, roca amoCemebul dawesebulebaSi sapirfareSoSi
mibrZandeba.
yoveldRe romelime Cvengani oTx-xuTjer mainc mouTmenlad iSmuSneba
sapirfareSos karebTan, fexidan fexze inacvlebs da grZnobs, rom metis moTmena
aRar SeuZlia. Sen ggonia, mas es ambavi odnav mainc awuxebs? sruliadac ara.
seansebi saaTiviT aqvs awyobili. rvis TxuTmeti wuTidan rvis naxevramde,
oridan samis TxuTmet wuTamde, oTxidan xuTis TxuTmet wuTamde da Tormetis
naxevridan Tormetamde. am ganrigs araviTar SemTxvevaSi ar daarRvevs. maSinac
ki ara, roca karebTan mdgomis marcxis momaswavebeli mudara esmis.
nomeri cxra: igi Cveni ojaxis wevri araa, magram Cveni saxlis da sufris
moziarea. elis kargi mada aqvs, saWmels ar arCevs, rasac miawodeb, yvelafers
siamovnebiT miirTmevs. mudam karg xasiaTzea, mxiaruleba uyvars, sandomiani da
dauzarebelia. erTi sityviT, SesaniSnavi TvisebebiTaa dajildoebuli.
ana
samSabaTi, 10 agvisto, 1943

Zvirfaso kiwi!
ai, Cemi axali idea. roca sufrasTan vzivar, sakuTar Tavs ufro
velaparakebi, vidre sxvas; amas ori upiratesoba aqvs: jer erTi, yvela
kmayofilia imiT, rom cotas vlaparakob, meorec, maTi msjeloba ar maRizianebs.
umetes SemTxvevaSi maTi Sexedulebebi sisuleled meCveneba, Cemi ki sworad,
Tumca jobs CemTvis Sevinaxo. asec viqcevi. roca iseT kerZs daamzadeben,
romelsac ver vitan, varwmuneb sakuTar Tavs, rom kerZi gemrielia da
SeumCnevlad yvelafers gadavsanslav. diliT, roca adgomis droa, rac me
Zalian ar msiamovnebs, sawolidan wamovxtebi da Cems Tavs veubnebi: `aba gabede
dawola!~ swrafad gadavwev `SuqsaniRbav~ fardebs, odnav SevisunTqav garedan
Semosul sufTa haers da iseTi grZnoba maqvs, TiTqos Zili arasodes ar
momsurvebia. xolo mere, roca logins vasworeb, dawolis araviTari survili
aRar maqvs.
ici, deda ras eZaxis amgvar moqmedebas? `cxovrebaSi msaxiobobas~.
sasacilo sityvaa, ara?
am kviris damdegidan warmodgena ar gvaqvs zust droze. Cveni sayvareli,
erTguli vesterturmis zari sadRac waiRes. albaT, gadaadnoben da qvemexebs
Camoasxamen. axla Cven arasodes ar viciT zustad, romeli saaTia. imedia, rames
moigoneben, rac mSvenieri zaris xmas Secvlis da mTel ubans misi dakargviT
gamowveul dards ganuqarvebs.
sadac unda gavCnde, zeviT Tu qveviT, yvela gaocebiT miyurebs fexebze.
axali, moxdenili fexsacmeli macvia. zamSis, Rvinisferi. sakmaod maRali,
msxvilqusliani fexsacmeli naxmaria da amitom mipma mxolod ocdaSvidnaxevari
guldeni misca. ise davdivar, TiTqos oCofexebze vidge da gacilebiT ufro
maRali vCanvar, vidre sinamdvileSi var. guSindeli dRe marcxiani iyo. marjvena
xelis TiTSi msxvili nemsi SemerWo yunwidan. amis Semdeg Cems magivrad margom
gafqcvna kartofili. mere SubliT karadis kars davejaxe da ise magrad, rom
kinaRam kibeebze davgordi. da radganac dajaxebam didi xmauri gamoiwvia,
momxvda kidec. Tan Sublze sveli tilos dadebac ki ver movaxerxe, radgan
wylis moSveba ar SeiZleboda. axla marjvena Tvals zemoT didi kopi mazis.
garda amisa, mtversasrutiT moviwewkve marjvena fexis neki. magram imdenad
viyavi dakavebuli, sxva usiamovnebebze imdens vfiqrobdi, rom am ambavs
yuradReba ar mivaqcie da ugunuradac moviqeci. Wriloba gamimizezda, fexi
Semixvies da veRar vicvam Cems mSvenier fexsacmels.
duselma misdauneburad kinaRam dagvRupa. man daavala mips (romelsac
araferi gaegeboda amisa), eyida akrZaluli wigni, pamfleti hitlersa da
musolinze. TiTqos gangeb, im diliT mips eseselTa motocikleti daejaxa. mipma
Tavi ver Seikava da miaZaxa: `ai, Tqve `mamaZaRlebo!~ sabednierod, yvelaferi
keTilad damTavrda da mipma gza ganagrZo. fiqric ki mafrTxobs, roca
warmovidgen, ra moxdeboda, mipi rom policiaSi waeyvanaT!
ana
oTxSabaTi, 18 agvisto, 1943
Zvirfaso kiwi!
dRes agiwer Cvens erTaderT yoveldRiur movaleobas kartofilis
fcqvnas.
erTs moaqvs gazeTi (nafcqvenebisaTvis), meores danebi (cxadia,
saukeTesos TavisTvis itovebs), mesames kartofili, meoTxes ki didi,
wyliT savse qvabi.
iwyebs batoni duseli. fcqvnis uxeirod, magram swrafad. kartofili
setyvasaviT cviva qvabSi, TviTon ki aqeT-iqiT iyureba da amowmebs: yvela masaviT
muSaobs Tu ara? Turme ara!
miyure, ane, xedav rogor miWiravs dana xelSi, vTli zemodan qvemoT,
ara, ase ara, ai, ase!
me ase ufro mexerxeba, vambob moridebiT.

 SeiZleba, magram damijere, rom ase gacilebiT ukeTesia. Tumca rogorc

ginda, CemTvis sul erTia.
ganvagrZobT Sromas. drodadro Cems mezobels almacerad gadavxedav.
duseli Tavs aqnevs, me misayvedurebs, magram TqmiT arafers meubneba. vmuSaob,
Sevcqeri mamas, romelic Cems pirdapir zis. misTvis kartofilis fcqvna ufro
saiuveliro samuSaoa, vidre garToba. kiTxvis dros Sublze Rrma naoWebi
uCndeba, xolo roca kartofilis fcqvnaSi, an cercvis da bostneulis
garCevaSi gvexmareba, irgvliv verafers amCnevs. am dros mas namdvili
`kartofilis~ saxe aqvs da manamde ar CauSvebs kartofils wyalSi, sanam
uzadod ar gafcqvnis. ar SeiZleba aseTi saxe gqondes da cudad fcqvnide!
bejiTad vmuSaob, magram drodadro irgvliv vixedebi da yvelafers
vamCnev. qalbatoni van daani cdilobs, duselis yuradReba miiqcios. saxeSi
misCerebia, magram dusels Tavi ise uWiravs, TiTqos verafers amCnevs. bolos
Tvali Caukra. duseli muSaobas ganagrZobs. Tvalis Cakvras sicili mohyva.
duseli misken ar iyureba. axla dedac icinis. qalbaton van daans araferi
gauvida da sxva gasarTobs eZebs.
puwi (es misi qmaria), winsafari aikari, Torem xval Seni kostiumi isev
gasawmendi meqneba, eubneba qmars.
ar davisvrebi. qalbatoni Cafiqrda.
puwi, ratom ar dajdebi?
me ase mexerxeba, roca kartofils vfcqvni, fexze dgoma mirCevnia.
erTxans siCumea.
puwi, xom xedav, SegeSxefa.
ara uSavs, Cemo kargo, frTxilad viqnebi. qalbatoni axla sxva
Temas eZebs.
miTxari, puwi, ratom aRar gvbombaven ingliselebi?
albaT, imitom, rom cudi amindia.
ki magram guSin mSvenieri amindi iyo da mainc ar mofrindnen.
nu imeoreb mudam erTsa da imaves.
nuTu azrTa gacvla-gamocvla ar SeiZleba?
ara!
ratom? geyofa, gaCumdi!
roca qalbaton franks surs raime icodes, batoni franki mudam wesier
pasuxs aZlevs.
baton van daans colis sityvebi ar moswons. es misi aqilevsis quslia. is
ebrZvis Tavis Tavs, ar unda ukmexi sityvebi wamoscdes, magram mcire xnis Semdeg
coli ganagrZobs:
mokavSireebi albaT saerTod ar gadmosxamen jarebs. qmari
sibrazisagan fiTrdeba, amis Semxedvare coli wiTldeba, magram ase advilad
xom ver moeSveba.
ingliselebs ki gulxeli daukrefiaT da arafers ar akeTeben!
yumbara afeTqda: daswyevlos eSmakma, bolos da bolos Caigde ena!
deda Zlivs ikavebs sicils. me Tvals varideb yvelas. Tu winaswar ver
moaswres waCxubeba, ase an amgvarad meordeba yoveldRe. winaswar waCxubebas ki
is upiratesoba aqvs, rom Semdeg orive Cumadaa.
kartofilis mosatanad sxvenze avdivar. peteri zeviTaa da did saqmes
Sesdgomia. katas... rwyilebs aclis... rogorc ki gamovCndebi, Tavs zeviT swevs
da Semomxedavs. kata grZnobs, rom xeli SeuSves da skup! Ria fanjaraSi xteba.
peteri ilanZReba. me vicini da dabla Cavdivar.
ana
paraskevi, 20 agvisto, 1943
Zvirfaso kiwi!
muSebi sawyobidan zustad eqvsis naxevarze midian da iwyeba Tavisufleba.
Tu am droisaTvis CvenTan eli amodis, es imas niSnavs, rom yvelaferi
rigzea da Cvenc cxovrebas vubrundebiT. Cveulebriv, eli jer zeviT amyavs,

sadac misTvis mudam gvaqvs Semonaxuli rame gemrieli. igi dajdomasac ver
aswrebs, rom qalbatoni van daani ukve TxovniT mimarTavs: `o, eli, rom icode,
rogor minda...~
eli Tvals mikravs, jer ar yofila SemTxveva, romelime zeviT amosuli
megobrisaTvis qalbaton van daans rame ar daevalebinos. amitom ar uyvarT
masTan asvla.
eqvss TxuTmeti wuTi aklia. eli midis. me ki ori sarTuliT dabla
veSvebi, jer samzareuloSi Sevdivar, mere kabinetSi, Semdeg ki muSis vuReb
sardafis kars, sadac naxSirs vinaxavT, da virTxebze sanadirod vuSveb. bolos
kontoraSi vbrundebi da kraleris savarZelSi vjdebi. batoni van daani axali
korespondenciis ZebnaSi yvela ujras da saqaRaldes qeqavs. peters sawyobis
gasaRebi miaqvs da muSi mihyavs. pimi sabeWd manqanas zeviT miaTrevs, margo
myudro kuTxes eZebs. kontoris saqmeebi aqvs gasakeTebeli. qalbatoni van daani
quraze wyliT savse did qvabs dgams. dedas kartofiliT savse qvabi Camoaqvs.
yvelas Tavisi movaleoba aqvs. peteri swrafad brundeba sawyobidan. upirveles
yovlisa, puri unda moitanos, romelsac yoveldRe kraleris kabinetSi
gvitoveben. dRes rogorRac daviwyebiaT! mas isRa darCenia, mTavar kontoraSi
gavides da aiRos. garedan rom ar dainaxon, daoTxili micocavs karadisaken,
purs iRebs da imaleba, ufro sworad damalvas apirebs, magram amasobaSi muSi
Tavze gadaevleba da saweri magidis qveS Zvreba. peteri yvela kuTxeSi eZebs
katas, bolos dainaxavs, epareba da cdilobs kudSi swvdes. kata Cxavis, peteri
oxravs. da ai muSi kmayofili zis fanjaraze da pirs ibans. peteri ukidures
saSualebas mimarTavs. katas puris naWers uwvdis da amiT yvelaferi Tavdeba.
muSi ankesze egeba. peters kata mihyavs. kari swrafad ixureba.
mTel am ambavs WuWrutanidan vucqeri, Semdeg ki muSaobas ganvagrZob.
mesmis kakuni. samjer meordeba, es ki imas niSnavs, rom vaxSamze meZaxian.
ana
orSabaTi, 23 agvisto, 1943
Zvirfaso kiwi!
ganvagrZob Cveni TavSesafris yoveldRiuri cxovrebis aRweras. saaTi
rekavs. dilis cxris naxevaria.
deda da margo nervuloben.
Cumad, mama... oto, Cumad... pim!
ukve cxris naxevaria, wyali unda davketoT!
Cumad iare!
ase afrTxileben mamas, romelic jer kidev ar gamosula `saabazano~
oTaxidan. zustad cxris naxevarze oTaxSi unda viyoT. amis Semdeg wylis
moSveba, sapirfareSoTi sargebloba da aqeT-iqiT sirbili akrZalulia. saxlSi
absoluturi siCume unda sufevdes.
roca qveviT kontoraSi aravin araa, xmauri ufro ismis da, cxadia,
sawyobamdec aRwevs.
cxris oc wuTze van daanebi kars aReben da iatakze samjer akakuneben:
`anes fafa mzadaa!~.
me aCqarebiT mivcocav zeviT da ZaRliviT viReb Cems ulufas. Semdeg
qveviT Camovdivar, vCqarob, yvelaferi unda movaswro: Tmis davarcxna, pot de
chambre1-is (1 Ramis qoTani (frang.).) gadaRvra, sawolebis gasworeba. Cumad, saaTi
rekavs!
zemodan ismis, rogor moipareba fostlebSi fexgayrili qalbatoni van
daani oTaxisaken. ukan qmari mohyveba, Semdeg ki sruli siCume mkvidrdeba.
axla SegiZlia datkbe Cveni ojaxuri idiliiT. me vkiTxulob an vwer.
amasve akeTeben deda, margo da mama. yvelas gvirCevnia, es wynari naxevari saaTi
kiTxvaSi gavataroT (mamas, ra Tqma unda, xelSi Tavisi sayvareli dikensi
uWiravs). Cumad zis Tavis gasaSlel WraWuna sawolze, romelzedac wesieri
leibic ki ar agia. leibis magivrobas ori Txeli pliumo eweva: `me arc es
mWirdeba, isedac iolad gaval!~, ambobs mama xSirad. rogorc ki wignis kiTxvas

Seudgeba, Tavs aRar swevs. zogjer Cumad icinis da cdilobs raRac waukiTxos
dedas CurCuliT. `axla ara, geTayva, amisaTvis ar mcalia~, eubneba deda. pimi
cota guldawyvetilia, magram cota xnis Semdeg isev ganagrZobs kiTxvas.
mogvianebiT kvlav aRmoaCens romelime gansakuTrebiT saintereso adgils da
kidev erTxel mimarTavs dedas: `ara, Cemo kargo, Sen es aucileblad unda
waikiTxo~!
sawolze Camomjdari deda an kiTxulobs, an qsovs, an keravs da amave
dros raRacas swavlobs. uecrad rame gaaxsendeba da aucileblad maSinve
gvetyvis: `ane, ici ra... margo, aba Caiwere! erTxans siwynarea. anazdad margo
wigns xmauriT xuravs. mamis warbebi rkalad ixreba da sasacilod miiwevs
zeviT, Sublze naoWebi uCndeba, magram gatacebiT ganagrZobs kiTxvas. deda da
margo CurCuleben. CemSi cnobismoyvareoba iRviZebs da yurs vugdeb, bolos
pimsac CaiTreven saubarSi... cxra saaTia, sauzmis droa!
ana
paraskevi, 10 seqtemberi, 1943
Zvirfaso kiwi!
yovelTvis, roca Sen gwer, raRac gansakuTrebuli unda moxdes, ufro
xSirad cudi, vidre kargi.
axla ki kargi ambavi unda gaxaro. oTxSabaTs (8 seqtembers) saRamos Svid
saaTze yvelam radios irgvliv moviyareT Tavi da gadacemas vusmendiT: `Here
folows the best news of the whole war. Itali has capitulated~.1 (1 gadmogcemT mTeli omis
manZilze yvelaze sasixarulo cnobas. italiam kapitulacia gamoacxada (ingl.).)
italiam xeli moawera usityvo kapitulacias!!!
rva saaTze `oranes~ gadmocema movismineT.
`Zvirfaso radiomsmenelebo! erTi saaTis win, roca Cveni morigi gadacema
davamTavre, SesaniSnavi cnoba miviRe. italiam xeli moawera kapitulacias.
moZvelebuli cnobebi udidesi siamovnebiT Cavyare saqaRalde yuTSi.
daukres inglisis, aSS-is da ssrk-s saxelmwifo himnebi. radiosadguri
`orane~ yovelTvis amxnevebs msmenelebs da amasTanave zedmet optimizmsac ar
iCens.
arc sazrunavi gvaklia. didad gvawuxebs batoni koophoisis mdgomareoba.
Sen kargad ici, ra Zlier gviyvars yvelas. miuxedavad imisa, rom xSirad
avadmyofobs, bevr tkivils itans, cot-cota unda Wamos, naklebi iaros da Tavs
gaufrTxildes, mainc mkvircxli, Tavaziani da saocrad mxne kacia.
`roca batoni koophiosi oTaxSi Semodis, iseTi grZnoba maqvs, TiTqos mze
amovida~. Tqva amas winaT dedam da marTlac asea. axla ki nawlavis mZime
operacia unda gaukeTon da sul cota oTx kviras mainc ver vnaxavT. unda
genaxa, rogor gamogvemSvidoba, TiTqos saavadmyofoSi ki ara, raimes sayidlad
midioda.
ana
xuTSabaTi, 16 oqtomberi, 1943
Zvirfaso kiwi!
rac ufro didxans grZeldeba Cveni aq yofna, miT uaresad veguebiT
erTmaneTs. sufrasTan veravin bedavs xmis amoRebas, radgan, rac unda Tqva,
mainc cudad CamogarTmeven an ukuRma gaigeben. depresia damewyo. valerianis
wveTebs vsvam, magram arafers mSvelis da dRiTi dRe sul ufro cud gunebaze
vdgebi. aTi patara TeTri abis gadaylapvas erTxel xmamaRla, Tavisuflad
gacineba ajobebda, magram aq sicils TiTqmis gadaveCvieT. zogjer imisic ki
meSinia, sanam es mZime dro gaivlis, davmaxinjdebi. piri mokumuli damrCeba,
saxeze ki mwuxarebis naoWebi gamiCndeba.
kidev erTi axali ambavi da isic usiamo. sawyobis erT-erT mosamsaxures,
vinme m.-s eWvi Seepara, rom saxlis ukana mxares raRac xdeba. Cven amas
yuradRebas ar mivaqcevdiT, didad cnobismoyvare da urwmuno rom ar yofiliyo.
da, rac mTavaria, ar viciT, ramdenad sandoa. erT dRes kralerma gadawyvita,

gansakuTrebuli sifrTxile gamoeCina. pirvels rom aTi wuTi aklda, qudi da

joxi aiRo da maxlobel saafTiaqo maRaziaSi Sevida. xuTi wuTis Semdeg ukan
gamobrunda da Cvens kibeebze qurdiviT amoipara, oris TxuTmet wuTze dabla
Casvla daapira, magram eli Semoxvda da SeaCera dabla kontoraSi batoni m.
ziso. kraleri zeviT amovida da oris naxevramde CvenTan darCa. bolos fexze
gaixada, fexsacmeli xelSi daiWira, windebis amara sawyobis wina karamde
miirbina, frTxilad ahyva kibes da kontoraSi quCidan Sevida. manamde elis
raRaca moumizezebia, batoni m. kontoridan gaustumrebia da kraleris
gamosaxsnelad CvenTan amovida, magram Cveni `jambazi~ ukve Zirs iyo. ras
ifiqrebdnen gamvlelebi, roca dainaxes, rom xanSi Sesuli darbaiseli kaci maT
Tvalwin fexze icvamda.
ana
oTxSabaTi, 29 seqtemberi, 1943
Zvirfaso kiwi!
dRes qalbaton van daanis dabadebis dRea. vaCuqeT xorcis, yvelis da
puris baraTebi, garda amisa, erTi qila muraba. qmarma, duselma da Cvenma
Zvirfasma mfarvelebma, yvavilebis garda, sursaT-sanovagec miarTves. ra
gaewyoba, aseTi droa.
am erTi kviris ganmavlobaSi elis nervulobisagan kinaRam sisxli Caeqca.
mTeli dReebi darboda, cdilobda CvenTvis rame eSova da amave dros xSirad
ukanve abrunebdnen, TiTqos da is ar eyidos, rac saWiroa. roca warmoidgen,
ramdeni samuSao aqvs kontoraSi (koophoisi avadaa, mipi gaciebulia da saxlidan
ver gamodis, Tavad elim fexi iRrZo), amave dros rogor itanjeba
siyvarulisagan (Tan saxlSi mama eCxubeba, misi arCevani ar moswons), maSin
advili gasagebia, rom mzadaa Rera-Rera daiglijos Tma. Cven igi vanugeSeT.
vurCieT mSvidad da gulgrilad ganacxados, rom ar scalia. maSin davalebaTa
sia aSkarad Semokldeba.
etyoba, van daanebTan kvlav raRac mogvixda. mama ratomRac saSinlad
gabrazebulia, ase rom, mosalodnelia qariSxali. netav me ar mesmodes yovelive
es, neta SemeZlos gavecalo aqaurobas. isini yvelas Wkuidan SegvSlian.
ana
kvira, 17 oqtomberi, 1943
Zvirfaso kiwi!
madloba RmerTs, koophoisi isev fexzea! Tumca jer kidev ferdakargulia,
magram samsaxurSi dadis da cdilobs van daanebis tansacmeli gayidos. Zalze
usiamoa, rom van daanebs fuli gauTavdaT. qalbatons tansacmeli bevri aqvs,
magram arafers ar imetebs, misi qmris kostiumi ki Zneli gasayidia, radgan
Zalian Zvirad afasebs. magram qalbatons mainc veraferi uSvelis. bewvis qurqs
unda gamoeTxovos! am qurqis gamo `zeviT~ saSineli Cxubi atyda, magram male
Serigdnen da axla wamdauwum isev gvesmis: `ah, Zvirfaso puwi!~, `diax, kerli,
Cemo saunjev!~
am bolo dros guls mirevs maTi gauTavebeli Cxubi da vulgaruli
lanZRva-gineba, romelic Cvens wesier saxlSi gaismis. mama kriWaSekruli dadis
da Tu vinmem rame hkiTxa, SekrTeba, TiTqos eSinia, kidev xom araferi moxda da
Cems Carevas xom ar saWiroebeno. dedas mRelvarebisagan wiTeli laqebi uCndeba
saxeze, margo Tavis tkivilebs uCivis, duselma Zili dakarga, qalbatoni van
daani mTeli dRe kvnesis da sruliad amovarda kalapotidan. zogjer
gvaviwydeba kidec, vin vis waeCxuba, vin visTan moaswro Serigeba. erTaderTi
gamosavali Sromaa da mec TavauRebliv vmuSaob!
ana
paraskevi, 29 oqtomberi, 1943
Zvirfaso kiwi!

`zemourebs~ isev saSineli Cxubi mouvidaT. da ai, risTvis: amas winaT

gwerdi, rom van daanebs fuli gauTavdaT. erT dRes koophoisma axsena Tavisi
megobari, qurqis ostati. batonma van daanma gadawyvita, colis qurqi gaeyida.
bocveris bewviani qurqi qalbatonma van daanma Cvidmeti weliwadi atara da
axla 375 guldenad gayides. es didi fulia! qalbatonma moindoma fuli Seenaxa
da Semdeg axali tansacmeli eyida. qmarma ris vai-vaglaxiT Seagnebina, rom
fuli ojaxisTvisaa saWiro. Sen ver warmoidgen, ra Cxubi atyda: ise iginebodnen,
rom SiSma Segvipyro. Cven oTxiveni kibeebze videqiT sulganabulni da
gadawyvetili gvqonda saWiroebis SemTxvevaSi moCxubrebi gagveSvelebina. aseTi
scenebi ise maRizianebs, rom saRamos cremlmoreuli vwevar sawolSi da
mixaria, rom bolos, rogorc iqna, marto davrCi.
batoni koophoisi kvlav saxlSi zis. kuWi isev awuxebs da jer kidev
gaurkvevelia, sabolood Seuwyda sisxlis dena Tu ara? ase Sewuxebuli
pirvelad vnaxeT. gviTxra, Tavs cudad vgrZnobo da saxlSi wavida.
me Tumca araferi mtkiva, magram srulebiT ara maqvs mada. waramara mesmis:
`ra cudad gamoiyurebi~.
unda giTxra, Cveni ojaxi arafers iSurebs imisaTvis, rom jansaRi da
Ronieri viyo. ras ar vRebulob: xan glukozas, xan safuars, xan kalciums da
xanac Tevzis qons. samwuxarod, nervebi sruliad aRar mivarga. kviraobiT amas
gansakuTrebiT mwvaved vgrZnob. kvira dRes mTeli saxli moSvebulia,
gunebawamxdari, ganwyobileba tyviasaviT mZime. arsaidan araviTari xma.
yvelafers gulisdamamZimebeli sevda awevs. am dros iseTi grZnoba maqvs,
TiTqos mZime lodi madevs kiserze da Rrma ufskrulisaken meweva.
aseT dReebSi mamis, dedis da margos mimarTac ki gulgrilad var
ganwyobili. davborialob mTel saxlSi, gavdivar oTaxidan oTaxSi, Cavdivar
kibeebze, mere isev zeviT amovdivar. Tavs ise vgrZnob, rogorc mgalobeli
frinveli, romelsac frTebi SeaWres da sibneleSi galiis wnelebs awydeba.
`gareT gamiSviT~, gahkivis CemSi yvelaferi, `menatreba haeri, sicili!~.
magram vici, rom pasuxs aravin momcems da dasaZineblad mivdivar. iqneb rogorme
movkla SiSiTa da dumiliT damZimebuli dro.
ana
oTxSabaTi, 3 noemberi, 1943
Zvirfaso kiwi!
mama mudam imaze fiqrobs, rogor gagvarTos da amave dros swavlisaTvis
saWiro pirobebi Segviqmnas. axlaxan erT-erTi dauswrebeli institutis
prospeqti gamoiwera. margom ukve mesamed gadaikiTxa es sqeli wigni, magram
saintereso veraferi aRmoaCina. fiqrobs, swavlis fuli TviTon gadaixados,
sakuTari jibis fulidan, magram yvelaferi Zalian Zviria. mamam SeukveTa
sacdeli leqcia: laTinuri damwyebTaTvis. margo gulmodgined Seudga saqmes da
mTeli kursi SeukveTa. samwuxarod miWirs, Torem mec siamovnebiT viswavlidi
laTinurs.
mama cdilobs mec gamiCinos saqme da koophoiss sTxova eSova sadme
sabavSvo saxareba, raTa axal aRTqmas gavecno.
rao, Sen ginda anes saxanukod saxareba aCuqo? hkiTxa margom
gaocebiT.
minda, magram ara... wminda nikolozis dRes ufro Sesaferia. qristes
araferi aqvs saerTo xanukasTan, upasuxa mamam.
mtversasruti gagvifuWda. amieridan yovel saRamos jagrisiT unda
vwmindo xaliCa fanjrebdagmanul, Rumelisagan daxuTul, xelovnurad
ganaTebul oTaxSi.
`ara, ase ar ivargebs~, gavifiqre me. da marTlac, haerSi dagubebulma
mtverma dedas Tavi aatkiva, xaliCas ki WuWyi mainc ar moscilda. mama gabrazda,
saxli daulagebeliao. adamianis xvedri amqveynad umadurobaa!
jerjerobiT Cxubi da kinklaoba miwynarda. mxolod duseli emduris van
daanebs. qalbaton van daans duseli aseTi sityvebiT amkobs: `gamosulelebuli

Zroxa~, an `beberi dekeuli~, qalbatoni ki am ucodvel, didad ganswavlul kacs,

romelsac yvelaferi swyins, `Sinaberas~ da `damwnilebul berbiWas~ eZaxis.
`virma virs didyura dauZaxao!~
ana
orSabaTi, 8 noemberi, 1943 (saRamo)
Zvirfaso kiwi!
Tu ki odesme Cems werilebs erTmaneTis miyolebiT gadaikiTxav, mixvdebi,
rom sxvadasxva ganwyobilebiTaa dawerili. sisulelea, rom aq, am TavSesafarSi,
amdenad var damokidebuli Cems ganwyobilebaze. magram marto me ki ara, yvela
asea. roca iseT wigns vkiTxulob, romelic Cemze did STabeWdilebas axdens,
sanam sxvebs davenaxvebode, cota unda davmSvidde, Torem ifiqreben, Seqandao.
Sen albaT SeamCnie, rogor mereva TandaTan sevdiani da damTrgunveli
ganwyobileba. Tavadac ar vici, ratom, mizezi ver gamominaxavs; SeiZleba
simxdalis bralia, rasac drodadro ver gavumklavdebi. am saRamos, roca eli
jer kidev aq iyo, zaris mkveTri xma gaisma. me mitkaliviT gavfiTrdi, muceli
amtkivda, guli amitokda, SiSisagan kinaRam movkvdi. saRamoobiT loginSi
yovelgvari saSineleba melandeba. xan sapyrobileSi var martodmarto
gamoketili, xan gzadabneuli davexetebi, xan Cveni TavSesafari iwvis, xanac Rame
Cvens wasayvanad modian.
yovelive amas ise ganvicdi, TiTqos cxadad xdebodes da yovel wuTSi
iseTi grZnoba maqvs, TiTqos raRac saSineleba mogvelis.
mipi xSirad meubneba, mSurs Tqveni, TqvenTan siwynareao. principSi
SeiZleba marTalia, magram aviwydeba, rom Cven mudmiv SiSSi vcxovrobT. me verc
ki warmomidgenia, rom qveyana iseTive iqneba odesme CvenTvis, rogoric iyo.
Tumca xSirad vambobT: `omis Semdeg!~ magram es sityvebi ise JRers, TiTqos
haerovan koSkze an iseT rameze vlaparakobdeT, rac arasodes ar iqceva
sinamdviled. xolo Cveni uwindeli cxovreba, saxli, megobari gogonebi, skola,
masTan dakavSirebuli sixaruli da mwuxareba, yvelaferi `adrindeli~ ise
magondeba, TiTqos es viRac sxvam ganicada da ara me.
iseTi grZnoba maqvs, TiTqos Cven, rva adamiani, wvimis bnel Rrublebs
Soris lurji cis naTel naglejze varT moqceuli. jerjerobiT mSvidad varT,
magram Rrublebi sul ufro mWidrovdeba. sul ufro metad ikvreba wre,
romelic aqamde moaxloebul safrTxes gvaSorebda. da bolos imdenad
dabnelda irgvliv, rom sasowarkveTilni uSedegod vawydebiT erTmaneTs da
vcdilobT Tavs vuSveloT, gaveqceT aqaurobas. Cven vxedavT, rogor ebrZvian
erTmaneTs adamianebi dedamiwaze da vixedebiT zecisaken, sadac simSvide da
bednierebaa. magram gzas gviRobavs sqeli, TvalSeuvali farda, romelic
gadaulaxavi kedeliviT gvartyia irgvliv da roca dro mova, gagvsress. me isRa
damrCenia, vevedro da vemudaro: `o, wreo, wreo, ganerTe da gaiTiSe, gagviSvi
gareT!~.
ana
xuTSabaTi, 11 noemberi, 1943
xotba Cemi avtokalmisa
`in memoriam~1 (1 mosagonari (laT.).)
avtokalami mudam Zvirfasi ganZi iyo CemTvis. didadac vafasebdi, radgan
oqros wveri hqonda da me mxolod aseTi kalmiT vwer kargad. Cemma kalmistarma
xangrZlivi, saintereso cxovreba ganvlo, amitom giambob mis ambavs.
roca cxra wlis viyavi, miviReT (bambaSi SefuTnili) avtokalami,
romelsac zemodan ewera `ufaso nimuSi~. es didebuli saCuqari Cemma sayvarelma
bebiam gamomigzavna. igi maSin aaxenSi cxovrobda. me gripiT viyavi avad da
viweqi, gareT ki Tebervlis susxiani qari qroda. tyavis wiTel budeSi Cadebuli
saucxoo kalami maSinve vaCvene Cems megobrebs da nacnobebs. me, ane franki, am
kalmis Rirseuli mflobeli gavxdi. roca aTi weli Semisrulda, neba damrTes,

avtokalami skolaSi wameRo. maswavlebelma ki ufleba momca gakveTilebze am

kalmiT mewera.
samwuxarod, momaval wels Cemi Zvirfasi ganZis saxlSi datoveba momixda,
radgan meeqvse klasis damrigebeli moiTxovda, mxolod saskolo kalmebiT
gvewera.
roca Tormeti wlis gavxdi da ebraelTa liceumSi gadavedi,
kalmistrisaTvis axali organyofilebiani bude maCuqes (erTi fanqrisaTvis),
romelsac moxdenili `elva~ Sesakravi hqonda. xolo roca cametis Sevsruldi,
kalmistari TavSesafarSi wamoviRe da erTgul samsaxurs miwevda Sromasa da
SenTan saubarSi. axla ToTxmetisa var da man CemTan ukanaskneli weliwadi
gaatara...
paraskevs, nasadilevs Cemi oTaxidan saerTo oTaxSi gavedi. mindoda
magidasTan davmjdariyavi da memuSava. magram mama da margo laTinurs
swavlobdnen da Seubraleblad gamomistumres. kalmistari magidaze damrCa. ane
magidis kuTxeSi unda miyuJuliyo da oxvra-vaebiT `lobio gadaerCia~, ese igi,
lobios yavisferi marcvlebisTvis obi moecilebina.
eqvss rom TxuTmeti wuTi aklda, iataki gamovgave da nagavi lobios
narCenebTan erTad RumelSi Sevyare. uecrad Zlieri ali avarda. me gamexarda,
rom TiTqmis Camqrali cecxli kvlav gaCaRda. amasobaSi `laTinistebma~ saqme
moaTaves. axla ukve SemeZlo mivjdomodi magidas da mecadineoba damewyo. magram
kalami arsad Canda. yvelaferi gadavqeqe, margoc momexmara, bolos deda, mama da
duselic SemogvierTdnen, magram Cemi Zvirfasi megobari ukvalod gaqra.
`iqneb lobios narCenebTan erTad RumelSi Seagde~, Tqva margom. `o, ara
mgonia!~ vupasuxe me. kalmistari saRamomde veZieT, versad aRmovaCineT da bolos
gadavwyviteT, rom daiwva, radgan celuloidi SesaniSnavad iwvis. Cveni varaudi
gamarTlda. meore dRes mamam nacarSi kalmistris buniki ipova. oqros
kalmisagan aRaraferi darCeniliyo. `etyoba, galxva da nacars Seeria~, Tqva
mamam. Tumc ra saTqmelia, magram erTi ram mainc manugeSebs:
Cemma kalamma kremacia ganicada, rasac Cems Tavsac vusurvebdi momavalSi!
ana
oTxSabaTi, 17 noemberi, 1943
Zvirfaso kiwi!
katastroful mdgomareobaSi aRmovCndiT. elis ojaxSi difteria
mZvinvarebs da eqvsi kviris ganmavlobaSi CvenTan ver mova! cxadia,
TanavugrZnobT elis, magram Zalze usiamoa isic, rom sakvebi da momarageba
mogvakldeba! batoni koophoisi isev wevs, rZisa da fafis mets verafers Wams.
kraleri Zlivs arTmevs Tavs saqmes!
margom laTinur enaSi davalebebi Seasrula, instituts gaugzavna da
gasworebuli ukanve miiRo. etyoba, maswavlebeli Tavaziani da Wkviani kacia.
albaT uxaria, rom aseTi niWieri mowafe gauCnda. mimowera elis saxeliT
warmoebs.
duseli rogorRac gamoicvala da aravin icis, ratom. daiwyo imiT, rom
baton da qalbaton van daanebs xmas aRar scems. es garemoeba yvelam SevamCnieT
da, radgan ramdenime dRe gagrZelda, dedam gadawyvita, dusels molaparakeboda,
eTxova, ar gaemwvavebina mdgomareoba. xom ici, qalbaton van daans emarjveba,
wvrilmanebze mTeli ambavi aagos. duselma ganacxada, rom pirvelad batonma van
daanma ugulebelyo igi da xma ar gasca, amitom mas araviTari survili ara aqvs
daarRvios dumili. guSin, 16 noembers, erTi weli Sesrulda, rac duseli
CvenTan gadmosaxlda. amasTan dakavSirebiT dedas yvavilebi miarTva, xolo
qalbatoni van daani, romelic yoveldRe eubneboda gadakvriT, aseT
SemTxvevebSi saCuqris mirTmeva miRebuliao, uyuradRebod datova da nacvlad
imisa, rom uangaro maspinZlobisaTvis madloba gadaexada, xma ar gaucia.
diliT, roca vkiTxe, mogilocoT Tu TanagrZnoba gamogicxadoT-meTqi, man
mipasuxa: CemTvis yvelaferi sul erTiao. deda apirebda, mSvidobis angelozis

keTilSobiluri roli Seesrulebina, magram veraferi gaawyo da yvelaferi

Zveleburad darCa.
`WkuiT didi kaci iyo,
saqmeebiT ki patara!~
ana
SabaTi, 27 noemberi, 1943
Zvirfaso kiwi!
guSin saRamos, roca daZinebas vapirebdi, Tvalwin naTlad warmomidga
lisi. idga Cems win dakonkili, gamxdari, ybebCacvenili. misi didi, sevdiani
Tvalebi sayveduriT micqerdnen, TiTqos meubnebodnen: `ana, ratom mimatove,
damexmare, mixseni am jojoxeTidan!~
me ki verafriT davexmarebi, SemiZlia mxolod Soridan vucqiro
adamianebis tanjvas da sikvdils da RmerTs Sevevedro, daifaros lisi, kvlav
Segvaxvedros erTmaneTs. me mgoni, gasagebia, ratom gamomecxada lisi da ara
sxva vinme. me masze arasworad vmsjelobdi, bavSvurad, ar mesmoda misi wuxili.
lisis Zalian uyvarda Tavisi megobari gogona da eSinoda, ar wamerTmia! rogor
ganicdida albaT amas, me vici, CemTvis nacnobia es grZnoba!
zogjer gakvriT vfiqrobdi masze, magram egoizmi mZlevda da isev Cems
sixarulsa da dards vubrundebodi.
ra cudad viqceodi, axla ki gafiTrebuli lisi sevdianad miyurebs
mudariT savse TvalebiT... o, rom SemeZlos daxmareba!
o, RmerTo Cemo, me aq TiTqmis yvelaferi maqvs, rasac ki movisurveb, is ki
muxTali bedis anabaraa mitovebuli! mas CemsaviT swamda RmerTi da yvelasaTvis
sikeTe surda. ratom unda gadavrCe me, is ki sadRac Cakvdes? ra gansxvavebaa
Cvens Soris? ratom dagvaSores erTmaneTs?
gulaxdilad rom giTxra, lisi ramdenime Tvea ar momgonebia, TiTqmis
erTi welia, magram arc damviwyebia. ver warmomedgina, Tu iseTi gaubedurebuli
iyo, rogorc momevlina.
eh, lisi, Tu oms gadaurCi, imedi maqvs, Cven gipatronebT. yvelafers
gavakeTeb SenTvis, yvelafers, rac dagakeli.
magram roca daxmarebis SesaZlebloba momecema, lisi albaT cocxali
aRar iqneba. netav Tu fiqrobs Cemze? netav ra grZnoba aqvs Cems mimarT?
RmerTo didebulo, mixede lisis, nu agrZnobineb, rom yvelam miatova,
uTxari, rom bevrs vfiqrob masze, miyvars da mebraleba. iqneb aman Zala Sematos.
ara, aRar SemiZlia amaze fiqri. mudam Tvalwin midgas misi sevdiani, Cemsken
mopyrobili Tvalebi.
Rrmad gaujda lisis rwmena gulSi, Tu mxolod ufrosebma Caunerges? me
es ar vici da arc arasdros mikiTxavs misTvis. lis, lis, neta SemeZlos Seni
dabruneba, netav momeces saSualeba gagiziaro yvelaferi, rac maqvs. ukve
gvianaa, Zalze gvianaa, veRarafers vuSveli da veRarc imas gamovasworeb, rac
droze xelidan gavuSvi! magram me mas arasdros ar daviviwyeb, RmerTs
Sevavedreb mudam!
ana
oTxSabaTi, 22 dekemberi 1943
Zvirfaso kiwi!
avad viyavi. gripi mqonda, amitomac ver gwerdi regularulad.
avadmyofoba aq TiTqmis katastrofaa. roca xvela amivardeboda, sabnis qveS
vZvrebodi da vcdilobdi Tavi Semekavebina. amis Sedegad ki xma mexliCeboda da
manamde ar gamivlida, sanam Taflian rZes anda xvelebis sawinaaRmdego kvers ar
momcemdnen. roca magondeba, rogor mmkurnalobdnen, Tvalebi axlac miWreldeba.
oflis dena, yelze kompresebi, sveli SefuTvna, mSrali SefuTvna, cxeli
sasmelebi, gaunZrevlad wola, yelSi gamovleba, yelSi amocxeba, saTburebi,
cxeli sabnebi da yovel or saaTSi sicxis gazomva. Sen rogor ggonia, SeiZleba
adamiani ase morCes? magram yvelaze uaresi is iyo, rom duselma eqimis roli

ikisra da pomadian Tavs SiSvel mkerdze madebda: xixini Tu ismiso. jer erTi,
misi Tma miRutunebda, meorec, im udavo faqtis miuxedavad, rom igi 30 wlis
winaT medicinas swavlobda da eqimis wodeba miiRo, mainc merideboda. ra saqme
aqvs am kacs Cems mkerdTan? Cemi Seyvarebuli xom ar aris! xolo imas, Tu ra
xdeba Cems gulSi da saRia Tu ara, mainc ver gaigebs. garda amisa, jer kargad
unda gamoiwmindos yurebi, radgan Cemi azriT, cota yurT aklia.
rogorc iqna movrCi! isev fexze var. erTi santimetriT gavizarde da ori
girvanqa movimate. Tumca jerac fermkrTali var, magram energia momemata da
muSaoba mominda.
am xnis ganmavlobaSi CvenTan axali araferi momxdara. marTla, uCveulo
ambavia, erTmaneTSi yvela SesaniSnavad varT. aravin ar Cxubobs, ager naxevari
welia, rac Cvens saxlSi aseTi simSvide ar yofila.
elis jer kidev ar SeuZlia CvenTan mosvla.
saSobaod yvelas daurigeben damatebiT zeTs, tkbileuls da jems purze
wasacxebad. maCuqes lamazi, savsebiT Tanamedrove ornaxevarcentiani monetisagan
gakeTebuli gulis qinZisTavi, romelic didebulad brwyinavs da krialebs.
duselma dedas da qalbaton van daans torti miarTva, romelic misi TxovniT
mipma gamoacxo. esRa aklda SromiT qancgawyvetils. mipisa da elisaTvis mec
maqvs raRac Senaxuli. TiTqmis ori Tvea vagrovebdi Saqars, romelsac fafaze
mosayrelad maZlevdnen da axla batoni koophoisi am Saqrisagan Saqaryinuls
gaakeTebinebs.
amindi Zils gvgvris, Rumeli bolavs, saWmeli kuWze gvawveba, rasac
naklebad esTetikuri bgerebi mowmobs.
TiTqos omic ar iZvris adgilidan...
ganwyobileba nulze dabalia!
ana
paraskevi, 24 dekemberi, 1943
Zvirfaso kiwi!
araerTxel miTqvams SenTvis, rom Cven aq didad varT damokidebuli Cvens
ganwyobilebaze. am bolo dros gansakuTrebiT mwvaved vgrZnob Tavs. ai, Cveni
mdgomareobis Sesaferisi gamoTqma: `xan zeciuri aRmafrena momicavs, xan Rrma
mwuxareba~. zeciuri aRmafrena maSin momicavs, roca vfiqrob, Tu ra kargad
movewyveT aq sxva ebraelebTan SedarebiT, Rrma mwuxareba ki... diax, aseTi
ganwyobileba meufleba, roca mesmis, rom Cveni kedlebis miRma cxovreba Tavisi
gziT midis. dRes CvenTan qalbatoni koophoisi iyo da gviambo, rom misi
qaliSvili kori sportiTaa gatacebuli, megobrebTan erTad naviT seirnobs,
warmodgenebSi monawileobs. Tumca me Suriani ara var, magram roca aseTi ram
mesmis, udidesi survili mipyrobs, kvlav aRmovCnde megobrebs Soris,
vimxiarulo sxvebTan erTad, udardelad da mxiarulad vicino! swored axla
iwyeba saSobao da saaxalwlo ardadegebi, Cven ki vsxedvarT aq, rogorc
gankicxulni. simarTle rom iTqvas, me arca maqvs ufleba amgvari ram mogwero.
albaT, umaduri mogeCvenebi. amave dros cotaTi vaWarbeb kidec, Tumca, rac
ginda, is ifiqre Cemze... ar SemiZlia, gulSi davitio yvelaferi. amitom erTxel
vTqvi da axlac vimeoreb: `qaRaldi yvelafers aitans!~
roca quCidan yinvisagan loyebawiTlebuli adamiani Semodis da mis
tansacmels qaris ganumeorebeli suni asdis, minda Tavze sabani wavifaro, rom
gaveqce Tavisuflebaze fiqrs: `rodis, rodis gveRirseba, gavideT gareT, sufTa
haerze!~
vici, damalva ar SeiZleba, piriqiT mamacurad, yoCaRad unda meWiros Tavi,
magram sakuTar azrebs ver verevi, tvins miRrRnian. merwmune, roca weliwadnaxevari gamoketili xar, uaresic mogiva, dae, vcdebode, merqvas umaduri, magram
grZnobebs xom versad gaeqcevi. minda vicekvo, vixtuno, davqrode velosipediT,
viyo Tavisufali, vixilo qveyana, davtkbe Cemi axalgazrdobiT! magram amas
mxolod Sen gwer, sxvebTan ver gamovamJRavneb. yvelam rom wuwuni movrToT da
daRvremili saxiT viaroT, sanamde mivalT?

zogjer vfiqrob:
`esmis ki vinmes Seni, iqneb ise giyureben, rogorc patara gogonas,
romelic mxolod garTobaze fiqrobs? SeiZleba, ar vici da verc veravis
vkiTxav, radgan im wamsve avqviTindebi... raoden Svebas vigrZnobdi, erTxel mainc
rom SemeZlos tiriliT guli vijero! vcdilob, ar SevimCnio es, yovelgvar
Teoriebs vTxzav da mainc yoveldRe sul ufro da ufro mwvaved vgrZnob,
rogor maklia namdvili deda, romelic gamigebda. amitom, rasac unda vakeTebde,
rasac unda vwerde, mudam erTi fiqri mitrialebs momavalSi Cemi
SvilebisaTvis viyo iseTi deda, rogorsac CemTvis vnatrob: `dediko~, romelic
yovel sityvas tragediad ar gadaaqcevs da seriozulad moekideba yvelafers,
rac mis Svils aRelvebs. vgrZnob, rom azri ise ver gamovTqvi, rogorc mindoda,
magram sityva `dediko~ yvelafers ambobs. ici, ra movigone! dedas rom rogorme
dediko davuZaxo? xSirad veubnebi `ged~, aqedan gamodis `gediko~, ese igi
damaxinjebuli `dediko~. ra siamovnebiT vityodi marTla dedikos `d~-ze
maxviliT. kidev kargi, rom deda verafers xvdeba, Torem guli etkineboda.
kmara! daufaravad giTxari, rac CemSi Rrma mwuxarebas iwvevs da mgoni
marTlac momeSva gulze.
ana
SabaTi, 25 dekemberi, 1943
Zvirfaso kiwi!
dRes Sobis pirveli dRea. ganuwyvetliv vfiqrob pimze, romelmac SarSan
Tavisi pirveli siyvarulis ambavi miambo. maSin me misi sityvebis mniSvneloba
ise ar mesmoda, rogorc axla. netav kidev erTxel melaparakos am sakiTxze,
rogorme mivaxvedrebdi, rom kargad mesmis misi.
Cemi azriT, pimi maSin imitom iyo gulaxdili, rom `yvelas gulis
mesaidumlea~ da zogjer masac uCndeba survili, sxvas gauziaros sakuTari
gulisnadebi. pimi Cveulebriv Tavis Tavze arafers ambobs da margos albaT
warmodgena ara aqvs, ramdeni ram ganucdia cxovrebaSi. sabralo pimi, ver
damarwmunebs, rom yvelaferi daiviwya. aseT rames adamiani verasodes daiviwyebs.
ufro TavdaWerili gaxda. minda cotaTi mainc davemsgavso mas, oRond ar minda
is gadavitano, rac man gadaitana.
ane
orSabaTi, 27 dekemberi, 1943
Zvirfaso kiwi!
Cems sicocxleSi pirvelad miviRe saSobao saCuqari. Cvenma orma megobarma
qalma koophoisTan da kralerTan erTad saucxoo siurprizi mogvimzades. mipma
Rvezeli gamoacxo da aseTi ram waawera: `mSvidoba 1944~. elim sadRac naxevari
kilo omamdeli namcxvari iSova. garda amisa, peters, margos da me TiTo boTli
kefiri mogvarTves, ufrosebs ki TiTo boTli ludi. yvelaferi lamazad iyo
SefuTvnili. yvela pakets Sesaferisi leqsi axlda.
Sobam swrafad gairbina.
ana
oTxSabaTi, 29 dekemberi, 1943
Zvirfaso kiwi!
guSin saRamos kvlav momeria sevda. Tvalwin bebiko da lisi warmomidgnen!
bebiko, Cemi Zvirfasi bebiko! ra cudad gvesmoda misi tanjva. mas ki yovelTvis
ecala CvenTvis, yvelafers xvdeboda, rac Cven gvawuxebda. maSin ukve mZime
avadmyofi iyo, iqneb icoda kidec es ambavi, magram, rom ar SevewuxebineT,
arafers ambobda. Cemi bebiko mudam keTili da alersiani iyo. aravin wasula
misgan ise, rom rCeva, nugeSi da daxmareba ar mieRo. maSin me saSineli
gaugonari viyavi, magram rac unda Camedina, yvelafers mounaxavda gamarTlebas.
Cemo bebiko, marTla Zalian giyvardi Tu Senc ar gesmoda Cemi! ar vici,
verafers vityvi: Tumca Cven erTad vcxovrobdiT, magram albaT mainc martoobas

grZnobda. diax martoobas, radgan, Tu gverdiT iseTi aravin gyavs, visac qveyanas
urCevnixar, SeiZleba bevrs uyvarde da mainc martoobas grZnobde. neta sad aris
lisi, cocxalia Tu ara? ra dReSia? RmerTo daifare da dagvibrune igi! lisi,
me Sens magaliTze vxedav, rogor SeiZleboda warmarTuliyo Cemi cxovreba da
Cems Tavs mudam Sens adgilze vayeneb. gana amis Semdeg aqauri ambebi ase
ubedurs unda mxdides, gana im wuTebis gamoklebiT, roca Senze da im
adamianebze vfiqrob, romlebsac aseTive xvedri xvda wilad, madlieri,
mxiaruli da kmayofili ar unda viyo?
magram mxdali da egoisti var! ratom melandeba mudam yovelgvari
saSineleba, ratom vfiqrob amaze imdens, rom mzad var xmamaRla viyviro?
imitom, rom CemSi araa WeSmariti rwmena! RmerTma imdeni momca, ramdenic ar
damimsaxurebia, me ki yoveldRe vakeTeb raRac iseTs, rac saWiro araa.
roca axloblebze vfiqrob, Tvalze cremli madgeba. sinamdvileSi
dilidan saRamomde unda vtirode. Cven mxolod erTi ram dagvrCenia: vevedroT
RmerTs, iqneb saswauli moaxdinos da zog maTgans sicocxle SeunarCunos. da me
vloculob, vloculob mxurvaled, mTeli guliT.
ana
kvira, 2 ianvari, 1944
Zvirfaso kiwi!
am diliT saqme araferi mqonda da Cemi dRiuri gadavikiTxe, aRmovaCine
iseTi werilebi, romlebSic RvarZlianad, TiTqmis aRSfoTebiT vlaparakob
dedaze. me SemeSinda da Cems Tavs vkiTxe: nuTu es Sena xar, ane, nuTu SenSia
amdeni siZulvili, nuTu es SesaZlebelia?
vijeqi skamze gadaSlili rveuliT xelSi da vfiqrobdi: rogor moxda,
rom CemSi amdeni RvarZli da siZulvili dagrovda. Sevecade Cavwvdomodi
maSindel anes da gamemarTlebina, radgan Tu ver agixseni, risTvis wavuyene
dedas amdeni braldeba, sindisi Semawuxebs. me yovelTvis viyavi da axlac var
ganwyobis adamiani. mxatvrulad rom vTqvaT, xSirad im myvinTavs vgavar,
romelsac wyalqveS yvelaferi damaxinjebulad eCveneba. yvelafers subieqturad
vudgebodi da sul ar vcdilvar dinjad gavrkveuliyavi sxvis naTqvamSi. maSin
iqneb ukeT gamego mowinaaRmdegis argumentebi da sxvagvarad moviqceodi,
daviokebdi Cems ficx xasiaTs da Seuracxyofas ar mivayenebdi sxvebs.
me mxolod Cems Tavs vxedavdi, Cem TavSi Cavikete da aravis dardi ar
mqonda, gwerdi Cems sixarulze, dardze, dagrovil geslze da guls
vimsubuqebdi. Cemi dRiuri axla CemTvis uzomod Zvirfasia, radgan mogonebebis
wignad iqca, Tumca SemiZlia bevri ram wavSalo, xazi gadavusva da qveS
mivawero: `warsuls Cabarda~.
xSirad gavbrazebulvar dedaze, xandaxan axlac vbrazob. marTalia, mas
Cemi ar esmis, magram, arc me mesmis misi. Cemi dedaa, nazad da kargad mepyroba,
magram xSirad usiamovneba mimiyenebia misTvis da ra gasakviria, Tu
gamibrazdeboda, ra gasakviria, Tu am ambavma da yvelaferma, rasac igi aq
ganicdis, nervebi auSala da ficxi gaxada. me amas ver vxedavdi, Seuracxyofas
vayenebdi, uxeSad veqceodi da mwuxarebas vmatebdi.
aman didi gaugebroba, didi usiamovneba gamoiwvia da orives vnebas
gvayenebda, magram axla yvelaferi es warsuls Cabarda.
advili gasagebia, ratom ar mindoda arafris danaxva da sakuTar Tavs
ratom vayenebdi tkivils. Cemi urCoba borotebis gadmonTxeva iyo, magram
Cveulebriv pirobebSi ganvmartovdebodi da mowmeebis gareSe rogorme
davZlevdi am nakls. Caviketebodi Cems oTaxSi, ramdenjerme magrad
davabakunebdi fexebs da dedis zurgs ukan movioxebdi guls.
wavida is dro, roca deda Cems gamo tiroda. me ufro gonieri gavxdi da
dedac cotaTi damSvidda. roca gajavrebuli var, enas kbils vaWer, dedac ase
iqceva da gacilebiT ukeT vcxovrobT. me ar SemiZlia miyvardes deda ise brmad,
rogorc es bavSvebs sCveviaT, CemSi raRac ewinaaRmdegeba amas, magram sindiss

imiT vimSvideb, rom jobs am qaRaldze vilanZRebode, vidre dedas vuxeTqavde

guls.
ana
oTxSabaTi, 5 ianvari, 1944
Zvirfaso kiwi!
dRes or rameSi unda gamogityde, rac, cxadia, did dros moiTxovs. vinmes
xom unda gadavuSalo guli da jobia isev Sen, radgan vici mudam, yovelgvar
viTarebaSi, dumxar. pirveli dedas exeba. Sen ici, ramdeni sayveduri miTqvams
dedaze. da mainc mudam vcdilobdi alersianad movqceodi. uecrad mivxvdi, ra
aklia mas Cems TvalSi. dedam TviTon gviTxra, megobrebad ufro mimaCnixarT,
vidre Svilebado. amas ra jobia, magram megobari dedis magivrobas ver gaswevs.
dedas unda mibaZo, idealad miiCnio. vgoneb margo am ambavs sul sxvanairad
uyurebs da ver gaigebs, rasac me aq vwer, mama ki yovelTvis gaurbis am Temaze
saubars. Cems warmodgenaSi deda pirvel rigSi unda iyos adamiani, romelsac
Zalian didi taqti aqvs, gansakuTrebiT Cemi asakis Svilebis mimarT da ar unda
iqceodes dedaCemiviT, romelic damcinis, roca vtiri, vtiri ara imitom, rom
raRac mtkiva, aramed ubralod guli maqvs damZimebuli.
SeiZleba ucnaurad mogeCvenos, magram erT rames verasodes vapatieb.
erTxel kbilis eqimTan damWirda wasvla. margo da deda Tan wamomyvnen da neba
damrTes velosipediT memgzavra. roca eqimis kabinetidan gamovediT, maT iqve
karebTan miTxres, rom qalaqSi apireben wasvlas raRacis sayidlad Tu
sanaxavad. axla zustad aRar maxsovs. mec mindoda wavyolodi maT, magram
velosipedi xels miSlida. guldawyvetilma tirili movrTe, maT ki sasacilod
amigdes. me ise gavcecxldi, rom quCaSi orives ena gamovuyavi. viRac mdabio
qals, romelmac gverdiT Camiara, SeeSinda. saxlSi velosipediT marto wavedi
da kidev didxans vbRaodi.
saocaria magram, sakmarisia gavixseno, ra Zlier gavbrazdi maSin, rom
tkivili, romelic dedam momayena, isev miaxldeba.
Zalian miWirs laparaki meore ambavze, romelic piradad me mexeba. guSin
wavikiTxe sis haisteris statia, romelSic aRwerilia, ra mizezis gamo
wiTldeba adamiani. iseTi grZnoba mqonda, TiTqos me mommarTavda. marTalia, me
advilad ar vwiTldebi, magram statia zustad Cemzea dawerili. avtori ambobs,
momwifebis periodSi qaliSvili ufro mSvidia, ufro Cafiqrebuli, TiTqos
akvirdeba im saswauls, romelic mis sxeulSi xdeba. am bolo dros ase
memarTeba mec da margosi da mSoblebis mrcxvenia. Tumca sxva mxriv margo Cemze
ufro morcxvia, magram am sakiTxSi ratomRac Cemi ar erideba. me mwvaved
vgrZnob garegnuli cvlilebebis saocrebas da kidev ufro metad Sinagan
cvlilebebs. da radgan veravisTan milaparakia imaze, rac maRelvebs, vcdilob
TviTon gaverkve.
roca `avadmyofoba~ mewyeba, aqamde samjer mqonda, tkivils,
usiamovnebas da uxerxulobas ganvicdi, magram iseTi grZnoba maqvs, TiTqos
sakuTar TavSi raRac sanukvar saidumloebas vatareb. miuxedavad siZneleebisa,
siamovnebiT velodebi im dros, roca kvlav ganvicdi amas. sis haisteri ambobs,
rom Cemi asakis qaliSvilebi jer kidev ar arian Tavis TavSi darwmunebulni,
mxolod mogvianebiT Seicnoben sakuTari arsebobis mniSvnelobas da
damoukidebeli azrebi, ideebi da Cvevebi uCndebaT. roca TavSesafarSi
gadmovediT, me mxolod cameti wlisa viyavi. cxovrebaze fiqri ratomRac sxva
gogonebze adre daviwye da vigrZeni, rom adamiani var, adamiani, romelic Tavs
aravis daaCagvrinebs. zogjer saRamoobiT ar SemiZlia, ar Sevexo Cems mkerds da
ar vigrZno, ra mSvidad, ra saimedod micems guli.
jer kidev adre, aq mosvlamde, amdagvari ram vigrZeni. erTxel megobar
gogonasTan gavaTie Rame. vkiTxe, Cveni megobrobis niSnad xom ar SevexoT
mkerdebiT erTmaneTs-meTqi. man uari ganacxada. me mudam msiamovnebda misi kocna
da xalisiTac vakeTebdi amas. roca SiSveli qalis, magaliTad, veneras

qandakebas vucqeri, eqstazi mipyrobs, misi mSveneba ise moqmedebs Cemze, rom
cremls Zlivs vikaveb, ah, neta myavdes megobari gogona!
ana
xuTSabaTi, 6 ianvari, 1943
Zvirfaso kiwi!
udidesi survili mqonda vinmesTan mesaubra, da ar vici ratom, avirCie
maincdamainc peteri. zeviT, peterTan mudam vpoulobdi myudroebas, magram igi
imdenad morcxvia, rom xelis SemSlelsac ki ver daiTxovs oTaxidan. amitom
adre ver vbedavdi didxans davrCeniliyavi masTan, megona moswyindeboda Cems
gverdiT yofna.
axla ki SeumCnevlad vcdilob, rac SeiZleba didxans davrCe masTan da
saubari gavaba. guSin kargi sababi momeca. am bolo dros peteri krosvordebis
maniiTaa Sepyrobili da mTeli dRis ganmavlobaSi mets arafers akeTebs.
gadavwyvite, davxmarebodi. da ai, Cven vsxedvarT magidasTan erTmaneTis
pirispir, peteri skamze, me ki divanze. yovelTvis, roca muq lurj TvalebSi
Cavxedav da vakvirdebi, rogor dasTamaSebs pirze Rimili, guli saocrad
mekumSeba. ase mgonia, mis suls vwvdebi da vkiTxulob. saxeze meryeoba, umweoba
da amave dros Tavisi mamakacuri Zalis Segneba aweria. misi morcxvoba ise
maTvinierebs, rom mudam mis Tvalebs veZeb. Zalian minda vTxovo: `nu geSinia,
miambe yvelaferi, rac SenSi xdeba~. saRamo miiwura, Cvens Soris ki araferi
momxdara. me mas mxolod sis haisteris statia gavacani, vuambe, ratom
wiTldebian adamianebi, Tumca ara ise, rogorc Sen mogwere. yovelive amas
imitom vambobdi, rom mindoda odnav gaTamamebuliyo.
saRamos sawolSi Cavufiqrdi yvelafers da ar mesiamovna, peteris
keTilganwyobilebas rom aseT did mniSvnelobas vaniWeb. sakvirvelia, ras ar
gaakeTebs adamiani, oRond Tavisas miaRwios. nimuSad SegiZlia me gamomiyeno.
gadavwyvite, xSirad mivakiTxo peters da vaiZulo, guli gadamixsnas. ar
gegonos, Seyvarebuli viyo, amaze laparakic zedmetia. van daanebs rom vaJis
nacvlad qaliSvili hyolodaT, me albaT masac davumegobrdebodi.
am diliT adre gameRviZa, Svidi saaTic ar iqneboda. im wamsve cxadad
aRdga Cems SegnebaSi wuxandeli sizmari. me vzivar magidasTan, Cems pirdapir
zis peteri... peter veseli. Cven ilustrirebul wigns vaTvalierebT. sizmari
imdenad cxadi iyo, rom suraTebic ki maxsovs. magram sizmari amiT ar
gaTavebula. Cveni mzera erTmaneTs Sexvda da me didxans vixedebodi mis
mSvenier Taflisfer, xaverdovan TvalebSi. bolos peterma Zlivs gasagonad
miTxra: `es rom mcodnoda, aqamde movidodi SenTan!~
am sityvebma ise amaRelva, rom maSinve piri vibrune. uecrad loyaze
peteris loya vigrZeni da raRac saocrad sasiamovno grZnoba dameufla. mis
loyas gaRviZebis Semdegac vgrZnobdi da ase megona misma mSvenierma Tvalebma
Rrmad Camxeda gulSi da amoikiTxa, ra Zlier miyvarda da miyvars. magram roca
momagonda, ra Sors iyo Cemgan, Tvalze cremli momadga da guli naRveliT
amevso, Tumca sixarulic mewvia, radgan vigrZeni, rom peteri mTeli guliT
miyvars. saocaria, ra cxadi sizmrebi maqvs aq. pirvelad sizmarSi bebia (mamis
deda) vnaxe da ise cxadad, rom mis saxeze naoWebs vamCnevdi. mere momevlina
meore bebia (dedis deda) mfarveli angelozis saxiT, Semdeg ki lisi, romelic
mTeli im ubedurebis simboloa, rac Cems megobar gogonebs da ebraelebs Tavs
daatydaT. roca misTvis vloculob, vloculob yvela ebraelisa da yvela
devnili da ubeduri adamianisaTvis.
axla ki myavs peteri, Cemi sayvareli peteri, ase cxadad me igi arasodes
daminaxavs, arafrad mWirdeba fotosuraTi. igi Cems mexsierebaSia aRbeWdili da
Zalian miyvars.
ana
paraskevi, 7 ianvari, 1944
Zvirfaso kiwi!

ra suleli var! aqamde azradac ar momsvlia, meambna SenTvis Cemi

gatacebisa da Cemi Tayvanismcemlebis ambavi.
jer kidev sul patara viyavi, mgoni sabavSvo baRSi davdiodi, roca karl
samsoni momewona. mas mama ar hyavda da dedasTan erTad deidasTan cxovrobda.
misi deidaSvili bibi, Wkviani, tanadi, Savgvremani biWuna, gacilebiT metad
moswonda yvelas, vidre Casuqebuli da sasacilo karli. garegnobas me
yuradRebas ar vaqcevdi da wlebis manZilze vmegobrobdi masTan. Cven didxans
viyaviT namdvili, kargi amxanagebi. Semdeg peters Sevxvdi da pirvelma bavSvurma
siyvarulma mTlianad damipyro. me axlac cxadad vxedav, rogor davdiodiT
quCaSi xelCakidebulni. peters tilos kostiumi ecva, me sazafxulo kaba.
male igi realur saswavlebelSi gadavida, me ki ufros mosamzadebel
klasSi Sevedi. xan is gamomivlida skolaSi, xan me gavuvlidi. peteri lamazi,
maRali, tanadi, warmosadegi ymawvili iyo da mSvidi, seriozuli, Wkviani saxe
hqonda. muqi Tma, RaJRaJa, mzemokidebuli loyebi, mSvenieri Taflisferi
Tvalebi da Txeli cxviri xatavda. gansakuTrebiT miyvarda misi sicili. am
dros bavSvuri gamometyveleba hqonda.
zafxulis ardadegebze qalaqidan gavediT. roca davbrundi, peteri sxva
binaSi gadasuliyo da masze bevrad ufrosi ymawvilis mezoblad cxovrobda.
miuxedavad amisa, isini ganuyreli megobrebi gaxdnen. etyoba im biWma uTxra
peters, rom jer kidev lifsita var da peterma Tavi damaneba. me ise miyvarda
peteri, rom didxans ar mjeroda es ambavi, magram bolos vifiqre, devna rom
davuwyo `mususs~ damiZaxeben-meTqi da moveSvi.
gadioda wlebi. peteri mxolod Tavis tol amxanagebTan megobrobda, me
arc ki mesalmeboda, magram mainc ver viviwyebdi. roca ebraelTa liceumSi
gadavedi, bevr Cems Tanaklasel biWs Sevuyvardi. me, cxadia, nasiamovnebi,
kmayofili viyavi, magram maTi yuradReba guls ar ekareboda.
mere TavdaviwyebiT Sevuyvardi haris, magram rogorc giTxari, me aRaravin
Semyvarebia.
amboben: `dro kargi mkurnaliao!~ mec ase megona. TiTqos daviviwye peteri,
guli avicrue masze, magram Cems qvecnobierebaSi mtkiced aRbeWdiliyo
sayvareli saxe da simarTles versad gaveqeci: ise veWvianobdi peteris yvela
nacnob gogonaze, rom mis Rirsebas gangeb vakninebdi da vcdilobdi gulidan
amomegdo.
am diliT ki isev davrwmundi, rom araferi Secvlila. piriqiT, rac ufro
memateboda xani da mowifuloba, miT ufro izrdeboda Cemi siyvarulic. axla
mesmis, rom peteri bavSvad mTvlida, magram mainc guli mtkiva, rom ase swrafad
damiviwya. me ise cxadad vxedav mas, rom vici: ase veRaravin daepatroneba Cems
fiqrebs.
sizmarma Tavgza amiria. am diliT, roca mamam makoca, kinaRam xmamaRla
viyvire: `ratom peteri ara xar! mTeli dRe vimeoreb CemTvis: `o, petel, Cemo
sayvarelo petel~!
vis SeuZlia damexmaros. minda kvlavac vicocxlo da RmerTs Sevevedro,
roca aqedan gaval, peteri mapovninos. igi Cems TvalebSi amoikiTxavs ra Zlier
miyvars da metyvis: `o, ane, rom mcodnoda, aqamde movidodi SenTan!~
erTxel, roca seqsualur sakiTxze vsaubrobdiT, mamam miTxra: `jer Sen
ver gaigeb, ras hqvia moTxovnileba~. me es maSinac vicodi, axla ki CemTvis
yvelaferi cxadia!
sarkeSi Cavixede da Cems Tavs davakvirdi. sul sxvanairad gamoviyurebi.
Tvalebs siRrme da naTeli moemata, Rawvebi ise Semefakla, rogorc karga xania
ar mqonia, piris moxazulobac ufro nazia. bednieri gamometyveleba maqvs,
magram Cems mzeraSi sevdaa Caqsovili da tuCebze Rimils miqrobs. me ar
SemiZlia bednieri viyo, radgan vici, rom peteri Cemze ar fiqrobs. Tumca isev
da isev vgrZnob Cemsken mopyrobil mSvenier Tvalebs da Cems loyaze mis gril,
rbil loyas.
o, petel, petel, rogor daviviwyo Seni saxe! gana vinc Sens adgils
daiWers, sacodavi ar iqneba? me Sen ise Zlier miyvarxar, rom siyvaruli gulSi

aRar meteva, cdilobs gadmoiRvaros, da mTeli siZlieriT Tvalwin

gadameSalos.
erTi kviris win, ara, guSinac rom vinmes ekiTxa, visze ginda gaTxovebao,
vityodi: `ar vici!~ axla ki mzad var viyviro: `peterze, mxolod peterze,
romelic mTeli guliT da suliT uangarod miyvars. magram zedmeti Jinianoba
ar unda gamoiCinos, me mas nebas vaZlev mxolod loyaze Semexos~.
dRes sxvenze avedi, fanjarasTan Camovjeqi da masze vfiqrobdi. mcire
xans visaubreT, Semdeg ki orive avtirdiT da me xelaxla vigrZeni misi tuCebi,
misi loyis uaRresad nazi Sexeba.
`o, peter, ifiqre Cemze da modi CemTan, Cemo sayvarelo, Cemo sanatrelo
peter!~
ana
oTxSabaTi, 12 ianvari, 1944
Zvirfaso kiwi!
ToTxmeti dRea, rac eli CvenTanaa. mipi da henki ori dRea ar gamoCenilan,
orives kuWi aqvs aSlili.
axali ambavi. gamitaca cekvam da baletma. saRamoobiT bevrs vvarjiSob.
cisferi maqmaniani qvedatanisagan dedam Semikera supermodernuli sacekvao kaba,
zeviT naoWayrili, mkerdTan SesakraviT, qvemoT ki didi bafTa aqvs mokerebuli,
magram Cemi sportuli fexsacmelebisagan sabaleto sandlebis gakeTeba
verafriT movaxerxe.
Cemi modunebuli saxsrebis gasaSlelad ukeTess verafers movigonebdi.
male iseTive moqnili viqnebi, rogoric adre viyavi. ai, erTi kargi varjiSi:
iatakze damjdari orive xeliT terfebs veWidebi da swrafad vwev fexebs zeviT.
magram Cemi sacodavi kudusuni rom metismetad ar gailaxos, qveS baliSs videb.
ufrosebi kiTxuloben wigns: `uRrublo dila~. dedas Zalian moswons.
wigni Tanamedrove axalgazrdobis problemebs exeba. me ironiulad gavifiqre:
`umjobesia, dainteresde im axalgazrdebiT, romlebTanac erT WerqveS cxovrob~.
me mgonia, deda fiqrobs, rom ukeTesi urTierToba, vidre me da margos
gvaqvs mSoblebTan, saerTod ar arsebobs da masze ufro aravin ar eloliaveba
sakuTar Svilebs. simarTle rom iTqvas, es mxolod margos exeba. Cemi azriT,
margos arc awuxebs is sakiTxebi da fiqrebi, romlebic me ar masveneben. me arc
vecdebi mivaxvedro deda, rom misi erT-erTi naSieri sul sxvanairia, vidre mas
warmoudgenia. mas mxolod sadardebeli moemateba, me ki minda, mwuxareba
avarido. amiT mainc araferi Seicvleba. deda grZnobs, rom margo ufro axloa
masTan, vidre me, magram amave dros darwmunebulia, adre Tu gvian yvelaferi
mogvardeba. Tumca am bolo dros Zalian yuradRebiania Cem mimarT, sul
sxvanairi, vidre aqamde iyo. qedmaRloba daiviwya, namdvili megobrebi gavxdiT.
axla aRar mivaCnivar im umniSvnelo arsebad, romelTanac seriozuli
urTierToba SeuZlebelia.
sakvirvelia, Cems Tavs zogjer ise vakvirdebi, TiTqos sxvisi TvaliT
vuyurebde. aseT SemTxvevaSi mSvidad vaTvaliereb anas da Cemi cxovrebis wigns
ise vfurclav, TiTqos sxvis mier ganvlili gza iyos. adre, roca Cvens saxlSi
vcxovrobdiT da amdeni fiqris Tavi ar mqonda, ase megona, dedasTan, margosTan
da mamasTan saerTo araferi maqvs, am ojaxis RviZli Svili ara var-meTqi.
zogjer Cems Tavs obol bavSvad warmovidgendi da manamde verTobodi amiT,
sanam cxadi ar gaxdeboda, rom sisulelea, Sens Tavs ubedur adamianad Tvlide,
roca ase kargad cxovrob. amgvari azrebis Semdeg mqonda iseTi periodi, roca
vcdilobdi keTili da alersiani vyofiliyavi. yovel diliT, roca vinme
amodioda kibeze, me vocnebobdi, rom es deda yofiliyo, Semosuliyo Cvens
oTaxSi da `dila mSvidobisa~ eTqva. maSin dedas tkbilad vesalmebodi,
mixaroda, rom nazad micqerda. magram zogjer ama Tu im mizeziT nakleb
alersiani iyo da im dRes gunebawamxdari mivdiodi skolaSi, xolo roca
skolidan vbrundebodi, vcdilobdi gamemarTlebina. masac xom bevri sazrunavi
aqvs, vfiqrobdi me da saxlSi mxiaruli da kmayofili Sevdiodi. dRis manZilze

gancdili gulSi ar meteoda, da mindoda yvelasaTvis meambna... Semdeg yvelaferi

Tavidan iwyeboda da me isev naRvliani da dafiqrebuli mivdiodi skolaSi.
zogjer gadavwyvetdi gamomemJRavnebina, rarig gamicruvda imedi, meTqva, rogor
gamityda guli, magram saxlSi dabrunebisas imdeni saambobi mqonda, rom
ganzraxva maviwydeboda da undoda Tu ara, dedas mainc yuri unda daegdo
CemTvis.
Semdeg iseTi dro dadga, roca aRar mainteresebda, ismis Tu ara kibeze
fexis xma, martoobas vgrZnobdi da baliSSi TavCarguli cxare cremlebiT
vtirodi. TavSesafarSi es grZnoba kidev ufro gamZafrda, Sen es ici. axla
RmerTma gaWirvebaSi myofs manugeSeblad peteri gamomigzavna! viReb medalions,
romelsac mudam Tan vatareb, nazad vkocni da vfiqrob: `ra saqme maqvs mTel am
aliaqoTTan? me myavs Cemi peteli da es aravin icis?!~
amaze fiqriT bevr rames gavumklavdebi. aravin icis, ra xdeba qaliSvilis
gulSi!?
ana
SabaTi, 15 ianvari, 1944
Zvirfaso kiwi!
azri ara aqvs, dawvrilebiT agiwero aqauri kinklaoba da Cxubi.
sakmarisia gacnobo, rom erTmaneTs gamoveyaviT. calke vinaxavT xorcs, karaqs,
cxims da CvenTvis viwvavT kartofils. am bolo dros mTeli dRis ulufas erTi
naWeri puric davumateT, radgan oTx saaTze ise gvSioda, rom kuWi gvewoda da
verafriT vaSoSminebdiT. axlovdeba dedaCemis dabadebis dRe. kralerma
cotaodeni Saqari moutana stumrebis gasamaspinZleblad, qalbatoni van daani ki
SuriT gaskda, radgan dabadebis dReze araferi aCuqes. arc ise sasiamovnoa,
ismende yoveldRe mis bRavilsa da autanel Rrials. unda gamogityde, kiwi, rom
misi mezobloba yelSi amogvivida.
dedam ganuxorcielebeli survili gamoTqva: netav or kviras mainc
mamyofa uvandaanebodo. me Cems Tavs vekiTxebi: nuTu yvela adamianTan mogiva
Cxubi, Tu erT WerqveS cxovrobT, an iqneb Cven bedi ar gvwyalobs? nuTu
adamianTa umetesoba egoisti da xarbia? uTuod kargia, me rom aq adamianis
buneba ukeT gavicani, magram kmara! omi jer isev grZeldeba da aravis ar
ainteresebs Cveni Cxubi, Cveni miswrafeba sufTa haerisa da Tavisuflebisaken.
amitom unda vecadoT `to make the best of it~.1 (1 yvelaferSi kargi mxare veZioT
(ingl.).)
kacma rom Tqvas, ra maqaqanebs? Tu didxans gagrZelda ase, lobios
gamxmar sars davemgvanebi, me ki gacilebiT mirCevnia, namdvili, cocxali gogona
viyo!
ana
SabaTi, 22 ianvari, 1944
Zvirfaso kiwi!
iqneb amixsna, ratom xdeba, rom adamianTa umravlesobas eSinia Tavisi
Sinagani bunebis gamomJRavnebisa, ratom xdeba, rom sazogadoebaSi sul
sxvanairad iqcevi, vidre saWiroa? vici, rom amis mizezebi uTuod arsebobs,
magram mainc gaugebrad mimaCnia, radgan uaxloes adamiansac ki ver endobi
bolomde.
me iseTi grZnoba maqvs, TiTqos im sizmris Semdeg gavizarde, ufro metic,
`pirovneba~ gavxdi. albaT, gagikvirdeba, magram axla van daanebzec vmsjelob da
maTTan davas da Setakebebs uwindeburad tuCabzekiT aRar vuyureb. ratom
Sevicvale ase?
ici, me bevrs vfiqrob amaze da mgonia, rom Cveni urTierToba sul
sxvagvari iqneboda, deda rom namdvili idealuri `dediko~ iyos. cxadia,
qalbaton van daanze ver ityvi, zrdilobiani adamianiao, magram deda rom
urTierTobaSi damyoli iyos da saubris gamwvaveba ar uyvardes, SeiZleboda
usiamovnebis naxevari mainc agvecilebina Tavidan. qalbaton van daansac aqvs

dadebiTi Tvisebebi, masTan molaparakeba SeiZleba. miuxedavad imisa, rom

egoistia da buzRuna, Tu ar gaaRiziane da ar SeuCiCxine, iolad daiyolieb.
marTalia, es `Tviniereba~ didxans ar gahyveba, magram Tu moTminebas gamoiCen,
SeiZleba Seewyo. kargi iyo, gulRiad da megobrulad gvemsjela masTan erTad
Cveni aRzrdis, ganebivrebis, kvebis da mraval sxva sakiTxze. maSin avcdebodiT
im ukiduresobas, roca erTmaneTSi mxolod uaryofiT Tvisebebs xedaven.
vici, kiwi, kargad vici, rasac metyvi.
`ana, nuTu es Seni azrebia? nuTu Sen ambob amas, Sen, romelzedac amdeni
cudi ram uTqvamT `zemourebs?~ Sen, romelsac amdeni usamarTloba ginaxavs
maTgan?~ diax, amas me vambob. minda me TviTon Cavwvde yvelafers, ar msurs
vicxovro Zveli naTqvamis mixedviT: `rogorc mama-papas sCveoda~... minda
davakvirde van daanebs da gamovarkvio, ra aris marTali da ra gadaWarbebuli.
xolo Tu imedebi gamicruvda, mec Cems mSoblebs mivemxrobi. magram SeiZleba
col-qmari ukeTesi aRmoCndes, vidre yvelas hgonia. maSin Sevecdebi Ziri
gamovuTxaro Cemi mSoblebis araswor warmodgenas maTze da Tu ver movaxerxe,
Cemi Sexeduleba da Tvalsazrisi mainc meqneba. yvela saSualebas gamoviyeneb,
qalbaton van daans sxvadasxva sakiTxze gavesaubrebi da vecdebi miukerZoeblad
gamovTqva Cemi azri. tyuilad xom ar meZaxian `froilain1 (1 qaliSvili;
germaniaSi ase mimarTaven gauTxovar qals.). yovlismcodnes~.
me sruliad ar vapireb Cveni ojaxis winaaRmdeg galaSqrebas, magram
amieridan Worebs aRar avyvebi. aqamde mtkiced viyavi darwmunebuli, rom
yvelaferSi van daanebi iyvnen damnaSave, magram nawilobriv, albaT, Cvenc
migviZRvis brali. SeiZleba principSi Cven yovelTvis marTali varT, magram
gonier adamianebs, da Cven xom aseTebad migvaCnia Tavi, moeTxovebaT, rom
yvela juris adamianebs Seeguon. raki aseTi keTilgonieri gavxdi, imedi maqvs,
momecema SesaZlebloba naTqvami cxovrebaSi ganvaxorcielo.
ana
orSabaTi, 24 ianvari, 1944
Zvirfaso kiwi!
saocari ambavi SememTxva. aqamde Cvens saxlSi sqesobriv sakiTxebze
idumali gamometyvelebiT laparakobdnen, skolaSi ki uxamsad da sazizRrad.
gogoebi mudam CurCulebdnen da Tu rames ver gaigebdi, masxrad agigdebdnen. am
sakiTxisadmi aseTi damokidebuleba ucnauri meCveneboda da vfiqrobdi:
`ratom laparakoben am Temaze ase farulad, anda sazizRrad?~ da
radganac arafris Secvla ar SemeZlo, gaCumebuli viyavi da am sakiTxze Zalian
axlobel megobars Tu davelaparakebodi zogjer. mere, roca TiTqmis yvelaferi
gavige da zogi ram mSoblebmac amixsnes, dedam miTxra: `ane, minda kargi rCeva
mogce, nurasodes nu elaparakebi biWebs am Temaze, xolo Tu TviTon
dagelaparakebian, maSinve Seawyvetine~.
Cemi pasuxi axlac kargad maxsovs: `ara, deda, cxadia ara, rogor
SeiZleba!~ da amiT gaTavda Cveni saubari.
pirvel xanebSi, roca aq gadmovsaxldiT, mama xSirad melaparakeboda iseT
sakiTxebze, rac merCia dedas aexsna. danarCeni wignebidan da saubrebidan gavige.
peter van daani am mxriv Zalian TavSekavebulia, mxolod erTxel Tqva raRac
amdagvari, isic ara im mizniT, rom pasuxi gamoetyuebina CemTvis.
qalbatonma van daanma erTxel ganacxada, rom peterTan am Temaze arc mas
ulaparakia da arc mis qmars. man arc ki icoda, ramdenad iyo peteri
gaTviTcnobierebuli.
guSin, roca margo, me da peteri kartofils vfcqvnidiT, saubari
Camovarda Cvens kataze, mofize:
Cven aqamde ar viciT, mofi mamalia Tu dedali, vTqvi me.
rogor Tu ar viciT, mamalia, ganacxada peterma.
raRa mamalia Tuki dRe-dReze knutebs elis, gamecina me. am
ramdenime kviris win TviTon peterma gvamcno, mofi imitomaa aseTi msuqani, rom
male knutebi eyolebao. magram mofi, etyoba, naqurdaliT gasuqda da muceli

gamoebera, radgan knutebi jerac ar Canda. peterma gadawyvita Tavi

gaemarTlebina.
SegiZlia wamoxvide da naxo, miTxra man, amas winaT veTamaSebodi
da Cemi TvaliT davinaxe, rom mamalia.
cnobismoyvareoba ver davZlie. peters sawyobSi Cavyevi. magram mofis
miRebis saaTebi ar hqonda da versad aRmovaCineT. cota xans velodeT da
radganac cioda, isev zeviT amovediT. saRamos gavigone, rom peteri qveviT
Cadioda. gambedaoba movikribe, carieli saxli gavirbine da sawyobSi Cavedi.
peteri mofis SesafuT magidaze eTamaSeboda, Semdeg sasworze dasva da undoda
aewona.
halo, ginda naxo? peters sruliad ar moridebia, marjved swvda
mofis TavSi, meore xeliT TaTebi SeuboWa, gadaabruna da daiwyo leqcia ai,
sasqeso organo, aq Tma aqvs, aq ki ukana gasavali!
uecrad mofi naxevrad Semobrunda da isev TeTr TaTebze dadga. vinme sxva
biWs rom ase eCvenebina CemTvis `mamakacis sasqeso organo~, TvalSi veRar
Sevxedavdi. magram peteri ise ubralod laparakobda am saCoTiro Temaze, rom
bolos mec momeCvena, aq gansakuTrebuli araferia-meTqi. Cven mofis
veTamaSebodiT, Tavs virTobdiT, uamrav sakiTxze vsaubrobdiT, mere ki
auCqareblad gaviareT didi sawyobi da zeviT amovediT.
xSirad SemTxveviT wignSi wavawydebi imas, rac Zalian minda vicode,
Senc ase mogdis? vkiTxe me.
ratom, me mSoblebs vekiTxebi, mamam bevri ram icis, ganaTlebuli kacia!
Cven kibeze videqiT da xmas ar viRebdiT. gogo rom yofiliyo, ase
ubralod ver davelaparakebodi am Temaze. albaT amas gulisxmobda deda, roca
mafrTxilebda, biWebTan aseT saubars erideo. roca sawyobSi gamarTul saubars
vixsenebdi, mTeli dRe rogorRac ucnaurad meRimeboda. Tumca imasac mivxvdi,
rom Seni xnis mopirdapire sqesis warmomadgenelsac SeiZleba elaparako
gonivrulad, yovelgvari suleluri xumrobis gareSe.
nuTu peteri marTla elaparakeba bevr rameze mSoblebs? nuTu marTlac
iseTia, rogoric guSin momeCvena.
ah, saidan unda vicode!
ana
xuTSabaTi, 27 ianvari, 1944
Zvirfaso kiwi!
am bolo dros didad gamitaca gvirgvinosanTa ojaxebis sagvareulo
genealogiam. roca kvlevas iwyeb, sul ufro metad eflobi warsulSi da bolos
friad saintereso ambebs awydebi.
yvela saganSi gulmodgined vmecadineob. axla ukve SemiZlia movismino
inglisis radiosadguris gadacema ingliselebisaTvis. kviraobiT Cemi
kinovarskvlavebis koleqciis gadarCevas da daxarisxebas vundebi. koleqcia
sakmaod gaizarda. batoni kraleri yovel orSabaTs maxarebs da CemTvis
kinoJurnali moaqvs. Cveni arcTu ise maRali sazogadoebis warmomadgeneli
mezoblebi amas fulis tyuilubralod flangvas eZaxian da gaocebulni arian,
rogor maxsovs gasul wels nanaxi filmis gmirebi. Tavisufal dReebSi eli
xSirad dadis kinoSi Tavis megobrebTan erTad, SabaTs meubneba, romeli filmis
naxvas apirebs da me maSinve CamovuTvli xolme yvela gmiris saxels da
movaxseneb, ra azrisaa kritika. amas winaT dedam Tqva, rom kinoSi siaruli aRar
damWirdeba, radgan winaswar vici filmis Sinaarsi, vin dadga da vin TamaSobs.
roca oTaxSi myofT sxvagvarad Tmadavarcxnili movevlinebi, yvela
gakvirvebiT miyurebs da mekiTxebian, romel kinovarskvlavs vbaZav. Cemi
mogonilia, vacxadeb me, magram aravis sjera. amgvari siamovneba naxevar saaTze
mets ar grZeldeba, me saabazanoSi gavrbivar da isev Cveulebrivad, sadad
vivarcxni Tmas.
ana

paraskevi, 28 ianvari, 1944

Zvirfaso kiwi!
am diliT Cems Tavs vkiTxe: xom ar veqcevi kiwis ise, rogorc Zroxas,
romelsac Zveli ambebis ReWvas aZaleben da am erTferovani sakvebiT
Tavmobezrebuli xmamaRla amTqnarebs da ocnebobs: iqneb anam raime axali
miambos. diax, kiwi, samwuxarod, mec vici, rarig mosabezrebelia Zveli ambebi,
warmoidgine, ukve mec mirevs guls. Tu sufrasTan politikaze an gemriel
saWmelze ar laparakoben, deda da qalbatoni van daani axalgazrdobis wlebs
igoneben, duseli ki raRacas mied-moedeba: xan Tavisi colis saucxoo
tansacmelze laparakobs, xan doRze, xan navebze, romlebSic wyali Sedis, xan
vunderkindebze, romlebmac ukve oTxi wlis asakSi icodnen curva, xan kunTebis
krunCxvaze, da xanac nervul pacientebze. saqme iqamde mivida, rom sakmarisia
romelime Cvenganma raRacis moyola daiwyos, meore maSinve CamoarTmevs sityvas
da ambavs ganagrZobs. Cven winaswar viciT, riT Tavdeba anekdoti da mTxrobelis
garda aRaravis ecineba. aTasjer gavaqiaqeT Cveni yofili diasaxlisebi,
mommarageblebi, yasbebi, vaWrebi, mepureebi da me aRar vici, ra SeiZleba iTqvas
Cvens TavSesafarSi axali. yvela ambavi grZelwveriania! amas rogorme avitandiT,
magram ufrosebs cudi Cveva gamoumuSavdaT: koophoisis, mipisa da henkis
monayols aTjer mainc gaimeoreben sxvadasxva sityvebiT da sakuTari
gamonagoniT Seavseben. aseT SemTxvevaSi magidis qveS Cems Tavs vCqmet, rom
gatacebiT molaparakes sityva ar Sevawyvetino. Cemi xnis bavSvebs araviTar
SemTxvevaSi ara aqvT ufleba ufrosebs xma gaakmendinon. maSinac ki, roca
usircxvilod tyuian da yovelgvar zRaprebs igoneben.
koophoisi da henki yovelTvis gvatyobineben, vin daimala an vin gaiqca.
maT ician, ra axlo migvaqvs gulTan amgvari ambebi, rogor ganvicdiT da
vitanjebiT im adamianebTan erTad, romelTac miagnes da rogor gvixaria
imaTTan erTad, vinc daWeras gadaurCa.
iatakqveS cxovreba da damalva axla iseTive yoveldRiuri movlenaa,
rogorc uwin mamis saSinao Custebi, zamTarSi rom RumelTan daxvdeboda.
iseTi organizaciebi, rogoricaa `Tavisufali niderlandebi~, yalb
mowmobebs amzadeben, saimedo TavSesafars pouloben da TavianT wevrebs
fuliTa da sursaT-sanovagiT amarageben, xolo qristiani axalgazrdebisaTvis,
romlebic `iatakqveS~ iwyeben cxovrebas, sando mewarmeebisagan samuSaos
Souloben, an sawarmoSi awyoben. saocaria, ramden rames akeTeben keTilSobili
uangaro adamianebi, romlebic sakuTar sicocxles safrTxeSi agdeben, sxvebs ki
exmarebian da bevric gadaarCines. amis saukeTeso magaliTia Cveni mfarvelebi,
romlebic aqamde gvexmarebian da imedia, keTilad migviyvanen bolomde.
winaaRmdeg SemTxvevaSi maT im adamianebis bedi unda gaiziaron, romlebic
ebraelebs mfarveloben. maT sityviTac ki ar ugrZnobinebiaT CvenTvis, Tu ra
mZime tvirTad vawevarT mxrebze da es marTlac asea! arc erT maTgans ar
wamoscdenia sayveduri imis gamo, rom Cveni gulisTvis amdeni davidarabis
gadatana uxdeba. yoveldRe amodian zeviT, mamakacebs politikaze da saqmeebze
esaubrebian, qalebs imaze, Tu rogor gaZnelda sursaT-sanovagis Sovna da
ojaxis gaZRola, Cven wignebsa da gazeTebze. gamometyveleba metad mxiaruli
aqvT, dabadebis dReze da sadResaswaulod yvavilebi da saCuqrebi moaqvT. da
yovelTvis mzad arian daxmareba gagviwion. Tumca omSi da mCagvrelTa
winaaRmdeg brZolaSi gmirebs ra gamolevs, magram Cven arasodes dagvaviwydeba
Cveni megobrebis Tavdadeba, megobrobisa da siyvarulis yoveldRiuri
dadastureba!
ras ar gaigoneb, lamis Wkuaze Sevcde da, rac mTavaria, monayoli
metwilad marTalia. koophoisma gviambo, gelderlandSi gaumarTavT fexburTis
matCi, sadac erT gundSi mxolod `iatakqveSelebi~ TamaSobdnen, meoreSi ki
adgilobrivi policielebi!
hilverzumSi axali sasursaTo baraTebi daurigebiaT. `iatakqveSelebi~
rom usursaTod ar darCeniliyvnen, adgilobrivma moxeleebma daniSnul droze

maTi `mfarvelebi~ gamoiZaxes da baraTebi dauriges. magram amgvari sagmiro

oinebi `mofebis~1 (1 germanelebis damcinavi saxelia.) yuramde rom ar mivides,
didi sifrTxilea saWiro.
ana
xuTSabaTi, 3 Tebervali, 1944
Zvirfaso kiwi!
uaxloes droSi mokavSireebis gadmosxdomas elodebian. Sen rom aq
yofiliyavi, albaT, Senzedac did STabeWdilebas moaxdenda es ambavi; magram
SeiZleba, masxradac agegdeT, radgan jer araferi momxdara, Cven ki Cvens
Wkuaze aRar varT. yvela gazeTi amaze wers da, roca kiTxulob, SeiZleba
marTlac SeiSalo:
`Tu ingliselebi holandiaSi gadmosxdebian, germaniis sardloba
holandiis dasacavad yovel Rones mimarTavs da Tu gaWirda, datboravs kidec~.
gazeTebi aqveyneben holandiis rukebs, sadac moxazulia is raionebi, romelTac
datborva elis. da radgan amsterdamis didi nawilic moxazulia, bunebrivia,
CvenTan aseTi kiTxva daisva: ra unda vqnaT, quCebSi rom wyalma erTi metriT
aiwios? aqve gaismis pasuxebi, yvela Taviseburad fiqrobs: fexiT an
velosipediT siaruli SeuZlebeli iqneba, amitom, rogorc ki wylis dineba
Sewydeba, foni unda movnaxoT.
ara, curviT unda gavideT. sabanao kostiumebiT da sayvinTi qudiT
SegviZlia didxans gavZloT wyalSi. veravin SeamCnevs, rom Cven ebraelebi varT.
ra sisulelea! warmomidgenia, rogor icuraveben Cveni qalebi, roca
virTxebi fexebSi swvdebian! (cxadia, romeliRac mamakacma ioxunja, magram
vnaxoT, vin ufro adre abRavldeba).
Cven verc ki movaswrebT saxlidan gamosvlas, sardafi imdenad
dampalia, rom wylis pirveli mowolisTanave saxli Tavze Camogvengreva.
xumrobis dro ar aris. vcadoT, iqneb sadme navi viSovoT.
ra saWiroa. TiToeulma aiRos sawyobidan Saqris didi yuTi, Cajdes
Sig, xolo niCbad CamCa gamoiyenos.
me oCofexebiT vivli, axalgazrdobaSi Cempioni viyavi.
henk van santens oCofexebi ar dasWirdeba, cols zurgze Seisvams da
mipi ukve oCofexebze iqneba.
ai, kiwi, mTeli Cveni saubari! xumroba advilia, sinamdvileSi ki
yvelaferi es sxvanairad moxdeba.
ar unda daviviwyoT kidev erTi sakiTxi, romelic agreTve gadmosxmasTanaa
dakavSirebuli. ra unda vqnaT, germanelebma rom amsterdamis evakuacia daiwyon.
SeumCnevlad gavyveT sxvebs.
araviTar SemTxvevaSi. aq unda davrCeT. germanelebi xalxs win
gairekaven da manamde ar moeSvebian, sanam yvela ar daiRupeba germaniaSi!
cxadia, aq davrCebiT. yvelaze saimedo adgilia. koophoisi unda
daviyolioT, rom ojaxianad aq gadmovides. tomrebs burbuSelaTi gavteniT da
maSin iatakzec SeiZleba daZineba. kargi iqneba, mipma da koophoisma winaswar
gadmoitanon aq sabnebi. 60 girvanqa fqvils cotas kidev davumatebT. henkma sadme
unda iSovos cercvi. axla saxlSi 30 kilogrami lobio da 10 klogrami cercvi
gvaqvs. garda amisa, 50 qila bostneulis konservi.
deda, aba CamoTvale sxva produqtebi!
10 qila Tevzi, 40 qila rZe, 10 kilogrami rZis fxvnili, 3 boTli zeTi,
4 qila karaqi, 4 qila xorcis konservi, 4 boTli marwyvis da 2 boTli xilis
wveni, 20 boTli tomati, 5 kilo Svriis burRuli, 8 girvanqa brinji, sul esaa!..
marags ara uSavs, magram Tu imasac gaviTvaliswinebT, rom stumrebi
gveyoleba Sesanaxi, xolo marags yovel kvira akldeba, maSin arc ise bevria.
naxSiri da sawvavi gveyofa, aseve sanTlebic. yvelam unda SevikeroT
gulze dasakidi toprakebi fulis Sesanaxad.
unda CamovweroT gaqcevis SemTxvevaSi aucilebeli nivTebis sia da
axlave CavalagoT zurgCanTebSi.

radgan saqme iqamde mivida, urigo ar iqneba, SevqmnaT sameTvalyureo

punqtebi, erTi sxvenze, meore saxlis Semosasvlel karTan.
ra unda movuxerxoT mTel Cvens sursaT-sanovages, Tu uwylod, ugazod
da usinaTlod dagvtoveben.
sadils Rumelze movxarSavT. wyals gavfiltravT da avaduRebT. unda
gavrecxoT ramdenime dawnuli boca da wyali movimaragoT.
ai, aseTi saubari mesmis mTeli dRis ganmavlobaSi. gadmosxdebian, Tu ar
gadmosxdebian, kamaToben, msjeloben SimSilze, sikvdilze bombebze,
sanTebelze, saZile tomrebze, ebraelTa gadasaxlebaze, sawamlav gazebze da ase
usasrulod.
Tu ginda icode, ra awuxebT Cvenebs TavSesafarSi, gadmogcem maT saubars
henkTan:
Cvenebi: Cven gveSinia, rom germanelebi ukan daxevis dros amsterdamis
mosaxleobas Tan waiyvanen.
henki: SeuZlebelia: sada aqvT amdeni transporti.
Cvenebi: transporti? nuTu Tqven ggoniaT, mosaxleobas matarebliT
gaamgzavreben? arc ifiqroT. fexiTac kargad ivlian. (per pedes apostolorom1, (1
viTarca mociqulni fexiT (laT.).) ambobs duseli aseT SemTxvevaSi).
henki: SeuZlebelia, Tqven yvelafers Sav ferebSi xedavT, risTvis unda
aTrion amdeni xalxi?
Cvenebi: gana ar iciT, ra Tqva gebelsma: Tu ukan daxeva mogvixda,
okupirebul teritoriaze arafers davtovebTo.
henki: magaT laparaks ra fasi aqvs!
Cvenebi: Tqven ra, fiqrobT, rom germanelebi metismetad keTilSobili
da humanuri xalxia da amas ar gaakeTeben? roca gauWirdebaT, ecdebian yvela
CaiTrion, vinc maTi gavlenis qveS imyofeba.
henki: rac gindaT is TqviT, magram me mainc ar mjera!
Cvenebi: Zveli simReraa. moaxloebul safrTxes aravin xedavs, sanam
piradad mas ar Seexeba.
henki: danamdvilebiT Tqvenc araferi iciT, es yvelaferi mxolod
Tqveni varaudia.
Cvenebi: Cven yvelaferi Cvens tyavze ganvicadeT, jer germaniaSi, mere
aq. gana ar iciT, ras sCadian ruseTSi?
henki: ebraelebze me arafers vambob. danamdvilebiT aravin icis, ra
xdeba ruseTSi. iqneb ingliselebisa da rusebis propaganda iseve gazviadebulia
rogorc germanelebis.
Cvenebi: ara xarT marTali. inglisis radio mudam simarTles
gadmoscems. davuSvaT, rom bevri ram gazviadebulia, magram faqtebi xom
Semzaravia. Tqven rao, uaryofT imas, rom poloneTsa da ruseTSi milionobiT
udanaSaulo adamiani gaziT amoaxrCves da mospes!
sxva saubrebis gadmocemiT aRar Segawuxeb. me mSvidad var da vcdilob,
rac SeiZleba cota ram gavigono. bolo dros im mdgomareobamde mivedi, rom
CemTvis ukve sul erTia, movkvdebi Tu cocxali davrCebi. qveyana uCemodac
iarsebebs, xolo istoriis gaCereba aravis SeuZlia. mosaxdeni mainc moxdeba,
manamde ki vimuSaveb, viswavli da imedi meqneba, rom yvelaferi bednierad
dasruldeba.
ana
SabaTi, 12 Tebervali 1944
Zvirfaso kiwi!
mze anaTebs, ca uZiro lurjia, sasiamovno sio qris. me ki... isev sevda
mipyrobs... yvelaferi menatreba... Tavisufleba, megobrebi... martooba. minda
laparakiT guli vijero, erTxel mainc momeces SesaZlebloba, Cems nebaze
vitiro! vici, tiriliT guls movioxebdi da Svebas vigrZnobdi, magram ar
SeiZleba. adgils ver vpoulob, davborialob mTel saxlSi, vCerdebi daxurul
fanjarasTan da vcdilob, CarCos WuWrutanebidan Semosuli sufTa haeri

SevisunTqo. vgrZnob sakuTar guliscemas, TiTqos meubneba: `bolos da bolos

gamiqarve sevda~.
albaT, gazafxulis bralia, vgrZnob, rogor iRviZebs gazafxuli, iRviZebs
Cems sxeulSi, Cems sulSi. rogorme unda davimSvido Tavi, sruliad moviSale,
aRarc kiTxva SemiZlia, aRarc wera da arc arafris gakeTeba. mxolod is vici,
rom sevdam Semipyro...
ana
kvira, 13 Tebervali, 1944
Zvirfaso kiwi!
guSindels aqeT CemTvis bevri ram Seicvala. da ai rogor:
danaRvlianebuli viyavi, me axlac naRvliani var, magram raRac mainc Seicvala...
swored am diliT SevniSne, da gulaxdilad geubnebi, am ambavma didad
gamaxara, rom peteri Tvals ar maSorebda, ise ki ar miyurebda, rogorc sxva
dros, aramed rogorRac ucnaurad. ar vici rogor, ver agiwer. adre megona,
peters margo uyvars, magram uecrad vigrZeni, rom saqme sxvanairadaa. mTeli
dRis ganmavlobaSi gangeb varidebdi Tavs, radgan Tu Sevxedavdi, isic
SemomaCerdeboda da maSin iseTi saamo grZnoba meufleboda, rom ar mindoda
xSiri ganmeorebiT daClungebuliyo.
o, rogor minda marto darCena, mama CemSi raRac cvlilebas amCnevs,
magram me ar SemiZlia yvelaferi vuambo. minda yvelas vuyviro: `momasveneT,
marto damtoveT~. vin icis, iqneb odesme ufro metad vigrZno simartove, vidre
es sasurvelia.
ane
orSabaTi, 14 Tebervali, 1944
Zvirfaso kiwi!
kvira saRamos, Cemsa da pimis garda, yvelam radiosTan moiyara Tavi.
germaneli kompozitorebis ukvdav nawarmoebebs ismendnen. duseli waramara
atrialebda aparats. peteri brazobda, brazobdnen sxvebic. naxevari saaTis
Semdeg peteri aenTo da gulmosulma dusels sTxova, moSveboda aparats.
duselma Cveuli sigoroziT upasuxa: `me vici, rasac vakeTeb!~
peteri gabrazda, wamovarda, mamamisma mxari dauWira da duseli
daTmobaze wavida. sul es iyo. TavisTavad TiTqos wvrilmania, magram, Cans,
peters Zalian moxvda gulze. am diliT, roca sxvenze wignebis yuTSi
viqeqebodi, peteri movida da mTeli es istoria miambo, me amis Sesaxeb araferi
vicodi da, roca peterma SeniSna, yuradRebiT vusmen, Tamamad alaparakda.
gesmis, daiwyo man, erTbaSad ver miTqvams yvelaferi, radgan
winaswar vici, rom azris sworad gadmocema miWirs, ena mebmeba, vwiTldebi da
xSirad sul sxva rames vambob da ara imas, risi Tqmac minda. bolos vCumdebi,
radgan sityvebi ar myofnis, guSinac ase momivida. mindoda raRac meTqva, is iyo
daviwye laparaki, magram uecrad avenTe. es ki yovelTvis cudia. uwin Zalian
uxeiro Cveuleba mqonda, romelsac zogjer axlac siamovnebiT gamoviyenebdi.
roca vinmes veCxubebodi, nacvlad imisa, rom sityvebiT mimemarTa, muStebiT
vumaspinZldebodi. vici, rom am gziT bevrs verafers miaRwev da amitom
aRtacebuli var SeniT. Sen kargi laparaki ici, pirdapir eubnebi xalxs, risi
Tqmac ginda da arasodes ar ibnevi.
Zalian cdebi, vupasuxe me. umetes SemTxvevaSi imas ver vambob,
risi Tqmac mindoda Tavdapirvelad, garda amisa, bevr sityvas vxmarob, bevrs
vlaparakob, es ki cudia!
gulSi Cems Tavze mecineboda, magram mas ar SevamCnevine, ramdenad
gaxarebuli var. mindoda meti elaparaka sakuTar Tavze, amitom iatakze baliSi
davagde, muxlebmokecilma zed myudrod movikalaTe da smenad viqeci.
me didad maxarebs is garemoeba, rom Cvens saxlSi aris kidev erTi
adamiani, romelic zogjer CemsaviT gacofebulia. peters aSkarad siamovnebda
CemTan saubari, SeeZlo sakadrisi sityvebiT Seemko duseli da arc imis SiSi

hqonoda, rom gauwyrebodnen. mec SesaniSnavad vgrZnobdi Tavs, radgan amxanagi

vipove. aseTi ram adre mxolod megobar gogonebTan urTierTobaSi ganmicdia.
ana
oTxSabaTi, 16 Tebervali, 1944
Zvirfaso kiwi!
dRes margos dabadebis dRea. pirvelis naxevarze peteri saCuqrebis
sanaxavad movida da karga xans darCa CvenTan, rac adre arasodes ar gaukeTebia.
sadilisaTvis yava movaduReT da Semdeg kartofilis mosatanad gaviqeci.
mindoda, weliwadSi erTxel mainc gamenebivrebina margo. roca peteris oTaxSi
gaviare, man maSinve akrifa kibeze dayrili qaRaldebi da gza damiTmo. vkiTxe,
sxvenze rom aval, liuki xom ar davxuro-meTqi.
ra Tqma unda, mipasuxa man, oRond roca ukan gamobrundebi,
damikakune da maSinve gagiReb. me madloba gadavuxade da zeviT avedi. aTiode
wuTi vafaTurebdi xelebs did kasrSi, wvril kartofils veZebdi, da manamde ar
gamovbrunebulvar ukan, sanam moxrils weli ar metkina da ar Semcivda. cxadia,
ar damikakunebia, liuki TviTonve gavaRe, magram peteri Semomegeba da
Tavazianad CamomarTva didi qvabi.
didxans veZebe, magram ufro wvrili ver amovarCie, vTqvi me.
did kasrSi Tu Caixede?
rogor ara, saTiTaod gadavarCie yvela.
me dabla videqi kibeze, is ki kritikulad dascqeroda qvabs, romelic
xelSi eWira. Zalian didi kartofilia, miTxra, roca qvabi gadmomca,
Tanac dasZina `SesaniSnavi!~ amave dros ise Tbilad da nazad Semomxeda, rom
gulis siRrmeSi raRac siTbo da sinaze vigrZeni. mivxvdi, rom undoda riTime
esiamovnebina CemTvis, magram saWiro sityvebi ver monaxa da Tavisi fiqrebi
mzeraSi Caaqsova.
me SesaniSnavad mesmoda yvelaferi da didad madlieri viyavi. axlac
sixaruls mgvris peteris sityvebi da gamoxedva, roca vigoneb.
Cavedi Tu ara qveviT, dedam miTxra, kartofili vaxSmisTvisac
dagvWirdebao. maSinve siamovnebiT avedi kidev erTxel zeviT.
peterTan Sevedi da bodiSi movuxade, rom xels vuSli. igi wamodga,
kedelsa da kibes Sua dadga da undoda ZaliT SeveCerebine.
me aval, miTxra man. ara, saWiro araa, axla wvrili kartofilis
amorCeva aRar momixdeba, vupasuxe me. Cemi naTqvami sarwmunod miiCnia da xeli
gamiSva. roca ukan vbrundebodi, liuki gamiRo da qvabi gamomarTva. sanam
oTaxidan gavidodi, vkiTxe:
sainteresoa, ras akeTeb?
franguls vswavlob, mipasuxa man.
SeiZleba vnaxo Seni davalebebi? vkiTxe me, xelebi gaviwminde da mis
pirdapir taxtze Camovjeqi.
jer ramdenime sityvis mniSvneloba avuxseni, Semdeg ki saubari gavabiT.
miTxra, vest-indoeTSi vapireb wasvlas plantaciebSi samuSaodo. momiyva, rogor
cxovrobda saxlSi, melaparaka spekulaciaze, miTxra, arafris maqnisi varo. me
vupasuxe, rom Zalze ganviTarebuli aqvs arasrulfasovnebis grZnoba. uecrad
ebraelebze daiwyo laparaki ramdenad ukeTesi iqneboda, qristiani rom
vyofiliyavi an omis Semdeg mainc SemeZlos gaqristianebao. davinteresdi, omis
Semdeg monaTvlas xom ar apirebda, magram arc es undoda. omis Semdeg aravis
ecodineba, qristiani var Tu ebraeli, miTxra peterma. gulSi raRacam
miCxvlita, samwuxaroa, rom mas aqamde SemorCa upatiosnobis raRac nasaxi.
Semdeg mamaze, adamianebis cnobis unarze da kidev bevr rameze
vilaparakeT. mxolod xuTis naxevarze wamovedi misgan.
saRamos isev sasiamovno ram miTxra. Cven erT-erT kinovarskvlavze
vlaparakobdiT, romlis suraTic odesRac vaCuqe da ager ukve weliwadnaxevaria kedelze ukidia. peterma Tqva, rom suraTi Zalian moswons. me sxva
kinovarskvlavebis suraTebi SevTavaze.

 ara, ara, jobs ase darCes. Sen naCuqar suraTs me yoveldRe vuyureb da
is Cemi megobari gaxda.
axla ki mesmis, ratom daaTrevs yvelgan muSis da efereba. masac enatreba
alersi. marTla, damaviwyda momewera, ai, kidev ra Tqva:
SiSiT me arafris ar meSinia, magram roca rame mtkiva, vnervulob,
Tumca amasac gadaveCvevi.
peters arasrulfasovnebis grZnoba saSinlad aqvs ganviTarebuli.
magaliTad, igi fiqrobs, rom Cven Zalian Wkvianebi varT, TviTon ki Zalze
suleli. roca frangulSi vexmarebi, aTasjer mixdis madlobas. male
aucileblad vetyvi: `Tavs nu isuleleb, samagierod, inglisursa da
geografiaSi Sen Cemze Zlieri xar~.
ana
paraskevi, 18 Tebervali, 1944
Zvirfaso kiwi!
roca zeviT avdivar, cxadia, mxolod erTi ganzraxva maqvs. `is~, vnaxo.
Cemi aqauri cxovreba bevrad ufro saintereso gaxda, raRac azri moeca,
sixaruli Seemata.
Cemi megobruli grZnobis `sagani~ mudam saxlSia da metoqeebis ar meSinia
(margos garda). ar ifiqro, Seyvarebuli var, ara, es ase ar aris, magram mtkiced
mwams, rom Cemsa da peters Soris lamazi grZnoba ganviTardeba, rac
dagvamegobrebs da erTmaneTis ndobas mogvipovebs. rogorc ki SesaZlebloba
momecema, maSinve masTan gavrbivar. axla aRar iqceva uwindeburad, roca ar
icoda, rogor Semoevlo CemTvis. piriqiT, maSinac ki laparakobs, roca TiTqmis
gasuli var oTaxidan. dedas maincdamainc ar moswons, me rom ase xSirad
avdivar zeviT. meubneba: nu awuxeb peters da moasveneo. nuTu ar esmis, rom es
Cemi Sinagani gancdebia? yovelTvis, roca peterTan avdivar, deda ucnauri
TvaliT miyurebs, roca iqidan CamovdivarT, mekiTxeba, sad iyavio. sazizRari
Cveulebaa, ver vitan.
ana
SabaTi, 19 Tebervali, 1944
Zvirfaso kiwi!
isev SabaTia da amiT TiTqmis yvelaferia naTqvami. dilam mSvidobianad
Caiara. cotaxans `zemourebs~ vexmarebodi, `mas~ ki mxolod gakvriT gavexmiane.
samis naxevarze sabani aviRe da qveviT kabinetSi Cavedi, mindoda magidasTan
davmjdariyavi da Tavisuflad mekiTxa da memuSava. mcire xnis Semdeg `momiara~,
xelebSi TavCarguli magidaze davemxe da mwared avtirdi. cremlebi Rvarad
Camomdioda. Tavs Zalze ubedurad vgrZnobdi. ah, neta movidodes `is~ da
manugeSebdes. oTx saaTze isev zeviT avedi. kartofili mqonda Camosatani da
vimedovnebdi, rom `mas~ iq Sevxvdebodi, magram sanam `saabazanoSi~ Tmas
vivarcxnidi, gavigone, rogor Cairbina sawyobSi mofisTan. cremlebi veRar
Sevikave, jibis sarkes xeli davavle da sapirfareSoSi Cavikete. gulmokluli
vijeqi da Cemi wiTeli winsafari Camodenili cremlebis muqi laqebiT daifara.
`ase verasodes ver movipoveb peteris ndobas~ gavifiqre me, `iqneb
arafrad magdebs. iqneb ar sWirdeba Cemi megobroba, iqneb mxolod sxvaTa Soris,
fiqrobs Cemze? kvlavac marto davrCebi umegobrod, upeterod. iqneb male
yvelaferi gamomecalos: imedic, nugeSic da molodinic!~
erTxel mainc momeces SesaZlebloba davayrdno Tavi mis mxars, iqneb
gamiqarwyldes uimedobisa da martoobis grZnoba. SeiZleba misTvis sruliad
arafers ar warmovadgen da yvelas ase alersianad uyurebs. SeiZleba Cemi
warmosaxvis nayofia, TiTqos misi mzera me mekuTvnis. o, peter, rom SegeZlos
daminaxo an momismino. magram me ver avitan simarTles, Tu mxolod gamawbilebs.
Tumca cremli jer kidev mdioda, magram imedi momeca da lodinis unari
damibrunda.
ana

kvira, 20 Tebervali, 1944

Zvirfaso kiwi!
rasac sxvebi mTeli kviris ganmavlobaSi akeTeben, CvenTan, TavSesafarSi
kvira dRes xdeba. roca sxvebi koxtad Cacmulni saseirnod midian, Cven mTeli
saxlis dalagebas viwyebT.
rva saaTi: duseli angariSs ar uwevs imaT, visac Zili uyvars. zustad rva
saaTze fexzea, jer `saabazanoSi~ Sedis, mere qveviT Cadis, male isev zeviT
amodis, Semdeg kvlav `saabazanos~ ubrundeba da iqaurobas wmends da fxeks. am
saqmes mTeli saaTi undeba.
aTis naxevari: SuqsaniRbavi fardebi ixsneba, inTeba Rumeli, van daanebi
dasabanad midian.
TerTmetis TxuTmeti wuTi: van daanebi gvikakuneben, `saabazano~
Tavisufalia. Cvenma Zilisgudebma mxolod axla wamoswies Tavi baliSidan.
magram axla ukve saqme swrafad midis: erTi, ori, sami, margo, me, da deda
rigrigobiT vrecxavT `did sarecxs~. Zalian civa da Cven gvixaria, rom grZeli
Sarvlebi gvacvia. Cvens Semdeg mamas rigia.
Tormetis naxevari: vsauzmobT. amis Sesaxeb arafers mogwer. CvenTan
isedac bevrs laparakoben Wamaze.
pirvelis TxuTmeti wuTi: yvela Tavis saqmes akeTebs. kombinezonSi
gamowyobili, muxlebze daCoqili mama ise gulmodgined wmends xaliCas, rom
oTaxSi mtvris korianteli dgeba. duseli sakuTar logins bertyavs da
beThovenis saviolino koncerts ustvens. deda sxvenze dadis, sarecxs fens, van
daani quds ixuravs da dabla Cadis. ukan Cveulebriv peteri mihyveba muSis
TanxlebiT. qalbatoni van daani irTveba: Salis Sav jemprs icvams, win grZel
winsafars ifarebs, Tavs Tbili wiTeli TavsafriT ikravs, xelSi sarecxis
fuTas iRebs, fexebs kaloSebSi hyofs da mrecxavi qalis kargad daswavlili
kniqseniT midis. me da margo WurWels vrecxavT da oTaxebs valagebT.
ane
oTxSabaTi, 23 Tebervali, 1944
Zvirfaso kiwi!
guSindels aqeT SesaniSnavi daria da me Cems Tavs ar vekuTvni. yovel
diliT avdivar sxvenze. minda, sufTa haeri visunTqo. aqve mecadineobs peteric.
amoCemebuli adgilidan vxedav lurji cis naWers, gaZarcul wablis xeebs,
romelTa totebze momcro cvris wveTebi brwyinavs. vxedav Toliebs, romlebic
moxdenilad navardoben da vercxlis feri gadahkravT.
peteri Zelze Tavmoyrdnobili idga, me iqve vijeqi, visunTqavdiT sufTa
haers, quCaSi vixedebodiT da vgrZnobdiT, rom Cvens Soris raRaca iseTi xdeba,
rac sityviT ar unda daafrTxo. didxans, didxans viyurebodiT quCaSi, xolo,
roca igi SeSis dasapobad koSkze adioda, me ukve yvelaferi vicodi, vicodi, ra
SesaniSnavi adamiania. peteri viwro kibes ahyva. mec gavyevi. meoTxedi saaTis
ganmavlobaSi, sanam muSaobda, xma ar amogviRia. vakvirdebodi, rogor
mondomebiT cdilobda kargad gaekeTebina saqme da CemTvis sakuTari Zala
daenaxvebina, da amave dros Ria fanjridan gavcqerodi amsterdamis zRva
saxuravebs, gaWimuls horizontamde, romelic ise CaZiruliyo cis laJvard
sivrceSi, rom mkafio xazs ver gaavlebdi: `sanam yovelive es arsebobs, sanam
sxivmfen mzes da mowmendil cas vxedav da vgrZnob, ufleba ara maqvs mwuxarebas
mivece~, gavifiqre me.
Tu adamiani sruliad marto, ubeduri an mwuxarea, yvelafers jobia,
gavides gareT, wavides sadme iseT adgilas, sadac igi marto iqneba cis,
bunebisa da RmerTis anabara. maSin, mxolod maSin igrZnobs, rom yvelaferi isea
mowyobili, rogorc saWiroa, rom RmerTs surs, adamiani bednieri ixilos
ubralo, mSvenieri bunebis wiaRSi. sanam es asea, da uTuod mudam ase iqneba,
me mjera, rom yovelgvar viTarebaSi yvela ubedurebas eSveleba da mtkiced
mwams, rom bunebas bevri dardis gaqarveba ZaluZs.

Cemi fiqrebi: Cven aq bevri ram gvaklia da kidev didxans gagrZeldeba ase.
es mec iseve vici, rogorc Sen. me ar vlaparakob materialur xelmokleobaze,
Cven aq sakmarisi gvaqvs yvelaferi, marto isa maqvs mxedvelobaSi, rac sulier
simSvides gvirRvevs. mec SensaviT mwyuria Tavisufleba da haeri, magram axla
mwams, rom rac dagvaklda, askecad agvinazRaurdeba. yovelive es am diliT
gavige uecrad, roca fanjarasTan vijeqi da Sinagan gancdebze vfiqrobdi.
avxede zecas, vigrZeni RmerTis siaxlove da bednieri, WeSmaritad bednieri
viyavi. o, peter, sanam CvenSi bedniereba suldgmulobs, bunebis xilvis,
janmrTelobis da bevri sxva ramis SegrZnebis bedniereba, sanam yovelive amas
Sens TavSi atareb, mudam, mudam bednieri iqnebi! yvelaferi SeiZleba dakargo:
simdidre, saxeli, gulSi Casaxuli bedniereba ki mcire xans Sesustdeba, magram
Semdeg kvlav aRdgeba da mTeli sicocxlis manZilze gagyveba. sanam SegiZlia,
uSiSrad axedo cas, sanam guli wminda gaqvs, bedniereba mudam SenTanaa.
ana
kvira, 27 Tebervali 1944
Zvirfaso kiwi!
gaTenebidan daRamebamde mxolod peterze vfiqrob. viZineb da Tvalwin
midgas, ZilSi mesizmreba, xolo roca viRviZeb, vgrZnob, rogor Semomcqeris
TvalebSi. me mgoni, me da peteri arc ise ganvsxvavdebiT erTmaneTisagan,
rogorc erTi SexedviT Cans da minda agixsna ratom: me da peters namdvili
deda gvaklia. dedamisi qarafSutaa, arSiyoba uyvars da misTvis, misi Sinagani
gancdebisaTvis maincdamainc Tavs ar iwuxebs. marTalia, dedaCemi did interess
iCens Cemdami, magram dedis gumani da mixvedriloba aklia.
orive vebrZviT Cvens grZnobebs. Cven jer gaubedavni, metismetad
moridebulni da mokrZalebulni varT imisaTvis, rom ufleba mivceT vinmes,
Cvens Sinagan samyaroSi SemoiWras. xolo roca amgvari ram mainc xdeba, Cemi
upirvelesi survilia `Tavis gamoxsna~. magram radgan SeuZlebelia, me Cems
grZnobebs vmalav da vcdilob, ise uxamsad moviqce, rom yvelam inatros: neta
male mocildebodes aqaurobaso.
peteri ki piriqiT, Tavis TavSi imaleba, TiTqmis arafers ambobs,
wynaradaa, ocnebobs da SeSinebuli gaurbis yvelas.
magram rodis da sad unda vipovoT erTmaneTi bolos da bolos? me ar
vici, ramden xans SeZlebs gonebiT Tavisi grZnobebis daokebas.
ana
orSabaTi, 28 Tebervali, 1944
Zvirfaso kiwi!
ar vici, ra momdis, mudam mis gverdiT varT da ar SemiZlia mivuaxlovde.
Tavi ise miWiravs, rom veraferi SemniSnos, vcdilob mxiaruli, Tavisufali
viyo, maSinac ki, roca sulis siRrmeSi yovelgvari imedi iwureba.
peter veseli da peter van daani erT peterad gadaiqca, alersian,
sayvarel peterad, romliskenac Zlier mimiwevs guli. deda autanelia, mama
alersiania da amis gamo kidev ufro autaneli, margo ki yvelaze autaneli,
radgan ginda Tu ara, gamicineo. me ki minda Tavi damanebos yvelam.
amas winaT sxvenze avedi. peteri ar movida CemTan. ratomRac gareT gavida
da raRacis keTebas Seudga. CaquCis yoveli dartyma mxneobis raRac nawils
maclida da ufro metad davnaRvliandi. sadRac kurantebi rekavdnen: `Tavi
maRla! guli gaimagre!~
vici, rom santimentaluri var, isic vici, rom saso warmekveTa da
goniereba davkarge.
damexmare! damexmare!
ana
oTxSabaTi, 1 marti, 1944
Zvirfaso kiwi!

erTma garemoebam piradi mwuxareba gadamaviwya. kvlav Semoamtvries karebi

da gagvqurdes. amdeni gaqurdva mosabezrebelia, magram ras izam, qurdebs aseT
did siamovnebas hgvris Tavisi stumrobiT pativi dasdon `kolen da kompaniis~
firmas. es gaqurdva ufro seriozuli aRmoCnda, vidre 1943 wlis 14 ivliss.
guSin diliT rvis naxevarze batoni van daani Cveulebisamebr dabla Cavida.
kraleris kabinetis Sua (minis) kari da kontoraSi Sesasvleli karebi Ria
daxvda. gakvirvebulma kontoraSi Seixeda da gaocda. yvelaferi areul-dareuli
iyo.
`aq uTuod qurdebi iyvnen~, gaifiqra man da kibe Cairbina. quCaSi
gasasvleli kari da avtomaturi klite xeluxlebeli iyo.
`etyoba, peterma da elim guSin saRamos daudevroba gamoiCines~, gaifiqra
man. erTxans kraleris kabinetSi ijda, Semdeg sinaTle Caaqro, zeviT amovida da
aRar ufiqria imaze, Tu ratom daxvda kari Ria da ratom iyo kontoraSi
yvelaferi areul-dareuli.
diliT adre peterma CvenTan daakakuna da arasasiamovno ambavi gvacnoba:
quCis kari yurTamde Riaa, xolo kedlis karadidan saproeqcio aparati da
kraleris axali portfeli gaqrao.. peters daavales, quCaSi gasasvleli kari
daeketa. batonma van daanma gviambo, rac guSin naxa. Cven Zalian SevwuxdiT. es
garemoeba mxolod ase SeiZleba aixsnas: vinaidan karebi Semomtvreuli ar iyo,
qurds, albaT, Tavisi gasaRebi hqonda. etyoba, saRamos adre Semoipara, kari
daketa da raki batonma van daanma xeli SeuSala, miimala. roca van daani
wavida, qurdi Tavisi nadavliT gaiqca da ise Cqarobda, rom karis daketva ver
moaswro. magram vis SeiZleba hqondes Cveni gasaRebi? ratom sawyobSi ar Sevida
qurdi? iqneb qurdi sawyobis erT-erTi muSaa da axla SeuZlia gagvces. cxadia,
van daanis fexis xmas gaigonebda da SeiZleba dainaxa kidec. SiSma Segvipyro,
radgan ar viciT, apirebs Tu ara qurdi kidev erTxel Cveni karis gaRebas da Tu
apirebs rodis? iqneb kacis danaxvam ise daafrTxo, rom aRar mogvekaros?
ana
xuTSabaTi, 2 marti, 1944
Zvirfaso kiwi!
dRes me da margo sxvenze avediT. magram masTan erTad zeviT yofna iseT
siamovnebas ara mgvris, rogorc Cems warmodgenaSi mesaxeboda, Tumca vici, rom
margo metwilad iseve grZnobs yvelafers, rogorc me.
dRes eli dedas da qalbaton van daans WurWlis recxvaSi exmareboda da
ugunebobas uCioda. ici, rogor anugeSes orivem? dedam aseTi rCeva misca:
ifiqros yvelaze, vinc dRes mTel msoflioSi iRupeba. magram ras giSvelis
sxvis ubedurebaze fiqri, roca TviTon xar sasowarkveTili? es azri me
xmamaRla gamovTqvi da aseTi pasuxi miviRe: `nu laparakob iseT rameze, rac ar
gesmis~.
ufrosebi xom briyvebi da gonebaClungebi arian. TiTqosda margo, peteri,
eli da me maTsaviT ar vgrZnobT yvelafers. aseT mdgomareobaSi mxolod
namdvili dedis, anu uaxloesi megobris siyvaruli Tu giSvelis. magram Cvens
dedebs sruliad ar esmis Cveni, dedaCems kidev ufro naklebad, vidre qalbaton
van daans. ra siamovnebiT vetyodi sabralo elis ramdenime Tbil sityvas, iseT
rames, rac sakuTari gamocdilebiT vici, rom nugeSis momgvrelia. magram am
dros mama movida da me zedmeti aRmovCndi. marTlac, ra sulelia yvela! Cven
ufleba ara gvaqvs, sakuTari azri viqonioT! da amave dros TavianTi Tavi
ultraTanamedrove adamianebad miaCniaT. ar gqondes sakuTari azri! SeiZleba
uTxra sxvas, gaCumdi! magram azrovneba aukrZalo, ara, ar SeiZleba. aravis ara
aqvs ufleba, aukrZalos vinmes azrovneba, Tundac igi Zalze axalgazrda iyos.
elis, peters, margos da me gviSvelis, siyvaruli, romelic oTxives gvaklia.
aravis ar esmis Cveni, gansakuTrebiT ki Cvens mozrdil idiotebs, radgan Cven
bevrad ufro mgrZnobiareni varT da bevrad ufro daxvewili azrovneba gvaqvs,
vidre maT warmoudgeniaT.

dedam isev usamarTlod misayvedura. etyoba, eWvianobs, radgan am bolo

dros qalbaton van daans ufro xSirad velaparakebi, vidre mas.
dRes nasadilevs, rogorc iqna, gamoviWire peteri. sul cota, sami
meoTxedi saaTi mainc visaubreT. peters uWirs sakuTar Tavze laparaki, magram
bolos mainc amoidga ena. miTxra, rom misi mSoblebi xSirad Cxuboben
politikis, sigaretis da yovelgvari umniSvnelo wvrilmanis gamo. roca amas
ambobda, Tavs uxerxulad grZnobda. axla me daviwye laparaki Cems mSoblebze.
peteri aRtacebulia mamaCemiT, `yoCaRi~ uwoda. vilaparakeT rogorc
`zemourebze~, aseve `qvemourebze~. peters gaukvirda, roca gaigo, rom Cven
maincdamainc ar gviyvars misi mSoblebi.
mismine peter, daviwye me, Sen ici, rom me gulaxdili adamiani
var, ratom ar unda giTxra yvelaferi. Cven xom viciT, ra nakli aqvT maT.
Semdeg ki aseTi ram vuTxari:
peter, Zalian minda dagexmaro, maZlev uflebas? Sen aq adgils ver
poulob da vici, rarig giWirs, Tumca amaze arafers geubnebi.
keTili, me mudam madlieri viqnebi daxmarebisaTvis.
iqneb jobda mamas moelaparako. mama arasodes ar gagcems. SegiZlia
daufaravad uTxra yvelaferi.
marTali xar, mamaSeni namdvili adamiania.
Sen xom kargad xar misdami ganwyobili? man Tavi damiqnia da me
ganvagrZe: isic Sendami, peter!
peteri yurebamde gawiTlda. Cemma sityvebma ise gaaxara, rom guli
amiCuyda.
Sen ase fiqrob? mkiTxa man.
ra Tqma unda, vupasuxe, es araerTxel msmenia misgan!
peteri yoCaRia, mamaCemiviT yoCaRi!
ana
paraskevi, 3 marti, 1944
Zvirfaso kiwi!
am saRamos sanTlebi1 (1 paraskevs saRamos ebraelTa ojaxebSi sanTlebs
anTeben.) aanTes. me isev gavmxiaruldi da davmSviddi. sanTlebis Suqze bebia
davinaxe, romelic mmfarvelobs da CemTvis mudam sixaruli moaqvs.
magram... Cemi fiqrebi sxvaganaa, peterTan. dRes roca zemodan kartofili
Camomqonda, man mkiTxa: `ras akeTebdi nasadilevs?~
kibeze Camovjeqi da saubari gavabiT. mxolod eqvsis TxuTmet wuTze
Cavedi dabla (kartofilis aRebidan zustad erTi saaTis Semdeg).
peters mSoblebze sityva ar dauZravs. Cven mxolod wignebsa da warsulze
vlaparakobdiT. SesaniSnavi biWia! kidev cota da albaT Semiyvardeba. saRamos
TviTon Seexo am Temas. roca kartofilis gafcqvna movaTave, masTan avedi.
Zalian Tbiloda da me vTqvi:
`me da margo temperaturis sazomad gamovdgebiT: roca civa, fermkrTalni
varT, roca Tbila, loyebwiTela~.
Seyvarebuli xar? mkiTxa man.
ratom unda viyo Seyvarebuli, vupasuxe me. Cemi xma sruliad
udardelad JRerda.
ratom ar unda iyo, miTxra man, magram am dros vaxSamze
dagviZaxes. neta ra undoda amiT eTqva? dRes, rogorc iqna, movaxerxe mekiTxa
misTvis, Tavi xom ar movabezre laqlaqiT? man mokled momiWra: `piriqiT, Zalian
msiamovnebs!~ ar vici, iqneb uxerxulobis grZnobam aTqmevina es. verafers vityvi.
kiwi, me namdvili SeyvarebuliviT viqcevi, romelsac, satrfos garda,
araferi axsovs. magram peteri marTlac oqroa! rodis momecema SemTxveva
vuTxra es? ra Tqma unda, mxolod im SemTxvevaSi, Tu misTvisac ramed vRirvar.
me xom iseTi knuti ara var, romelsac SeiZleba Sen nebaze moeqce. me es kargad
vici. mas ki imdenad uyvars martooba, rom arc ki vici, movwonvar Tu ara.

yovel SemTxvevaSi, Cven nel-nela vecnobiT erTmaneTs. magram Cemi

survilia, ufro gulaxdilni viyoT. vin icis, iqneb es dro ufro Cqara dadges,
vidre me vfiqrob. yoveldRe ramdenjerme Semomxedavs SeTqmuliviT, mec Tvals
vukrav da orive kmayofilni varT! Tumca sisulelea imis Tqma, rom peteri
CemsaviT bednieria, magram ratomRac mgonia, rom isic CemsaviT fiqrobs!
ana
SabaTi, 4 marti, 1944
Zvirfaso kiwi!
amdeni Tvis manZilze dRes pirveli SabaTia, roca arc mowyenili var, arc
naRvliani da arc guldamZimebuli. amis mizezi ki peteria.
dRes, roca sxvenze winsafris gasafenad avedi, mama iq damxvda (peters
amecadinebs yoveldRe) da mkiTxa, xom ar msurs maTTan erTad frangulSi
mecadineoba. Txovnis ganmeoreba ar dasWirvebia. jer frangulad vilaparakeT,
peters zogi ram avuxseni, Semdeg ki inglisurze gadavediT. mamam xmamaRla
wagvikiTxa nawyvetebi dikensis nawarmoebebidan da me araCveulebrivad bednieri
viyavi, radgan peteris gverdiT vijeqi, mamis skamze.
11 saaTze qveviT Camovedi, xolo Tormetis naxevarze roca kvlav zeviT
avedi, igi ukve kibeze idga da me meloda. Cven pirvel saaTamde visaubreT. Tu
yvelaferi rigzea da yuradRebas aravin gvaqcevs, nasadilevs, roca oTaxidan
gavdivar, meubneba: `jerjerobiT ane, Sexvedramde!~
ah, rogor mixaria! neta, Tu mogwonvar? yovel SemTxvevaSi, SesaniSnavi
ymawvilia da me vfiqrob, Cven mSvenivrad gavugebT erTmaneTs. qalbaton van
daans uxaria, roca me da peteri erTad varT. dRes ki gasaxeleblad mkiTxa:
Tu SeiZleba gendoT adamiani, roca iq, zeviT, martoni xarT?
ra Tqma unda, aRvSfoTdi me, Tqven me SeuracxmyofT!
dilidan saRamomde marto is maxarebs, rom peters vnaxav.
ana
orSabaTi, 6 marti, 1944
Zvirfaso kiwi!
peters saxeze vamCnev, rom isic iseve bevrs fiqrobs Cemze, rogorc me
masze. guSin saRamos, roca dedamisma xumrobiT `moazrovne~ uwoda, saSinlad
gavbrazdi, peters Sercxva da gawiTlda, me ki mzad viyavi saxeSi vcemodi!
ratom ver aCereben adamianebi enas? ver warmoidgen, ra Znelia, roca
xedav mis martoobas da verafers Sveli. me ise cxadad vgrZnob, ra
sasowarkveTilia, roca xedavs am kinklaobas, am sicarieles, TiTqos Tavad
ganvicdi. sabralo peter, ra Zlier gWirdeba siyvaruli!
guli mtkiva, roca misgan mesmis, rom araviTari megobari ar sWirdeba.
cxadia, cdeba! SeiZleba arc fiqrobs ase, magram CasWidebia moCvenebiT
gulgrilobas da aRar unda moeSvas arCeul rols, daanaxos vinmes Tavisi
namdvili grZnobebi. peter, sanamde unda gagrZeldes ase? iqneb am zeadamianur
daZabulobas saSineli afeTqeba mohyves?
o, peter, ufleba rom mqondes dagexmaro! orive erTad rogorme
davZlevdiT Cvens martoobas. me bevrs vfiqrob, magram yvelafers ar vambob.
mixaria, roca mas vxedav, gansakuTrebiT ki Tu am dros mzec anaTebs.
guSin Tavs vibandi da erT ambavSi viyavi. vicodi, rom is gverdiT
oTaxSia. ra gaewyoba, rac ufro wynari da seriozuli var Sinaganad, miT ufro
vyoyoCob. vin gaigebs amas sxvebze adre, vin Seamsxvrevs javSans. kidev kargi van
daanebs vaJi hyavT da ara qaliSvili! megobroba arasodes ar iqneboda ase Zneli
mosapovebeli, aseTi mSvenieri da gamabednierebeli, sqesTa
urTierTmiziduloba rom ar arsebobdes.
Sen ici, rom gulaxdilad gwer yvelafers. amitom unda gamogityde:
vsuldgmulob mxolod Sexvedridan Sexvedramde. neta vicode, isic Tu ase
melodeba! guls miCuyebs misi uxerxuli cda, rac SeiZleba SeumCnevlad

momiaxlovdes. masac CemsaviT unda gadauSalos vinmes guli, albaT, warmodgena

ara aqvs, rom me swored misi umweoba mizidavs.
ana
samSabaTi, 7 marti, 1944
Zvirfaso kiwi!
roca Cems 1942 wlis cxovrebas vigoneb, yvelaferi ararealuri meCveneba.
im cxovrebiT TiTqos sxva ane cxovrobda da ara is, romelic aq ase daWkvianda.
diax, SesaniSnavi cxovreba iyo! uamravi Tayvanismcemlebi, ociode megobari
gogona da nacnobebi. TiTqmis yvela maswavlebels vuyvardi, mSoblebi
manebivrebdnen, fuli sakmarisi mqonda, meti raRa ginda?
albaT ikiTxav, rogor movaxerxe amdeni adamianis gulis monadireba. roca
peteri ambobs rom es `charme~1-iTaa (1 momxibvleloba (frang.)) gamowveuli,
mTlad marTali araa. maswavleblebs moswondaT da arTobdaT Cemi moswrebuli
pasuxebi, sasacilo SeniSvnebi, mocinare saxe da kritikuli Tvali. es Tvisebebi
sainteresod da sasiamovnod miaCndaT da es asec iyo. saSineli arSiyi viyavi,
kekluci da mxiaruli, magram amasTan erTad dadebiTi Tvisebebic mqonda,
romelTa wyalobiT TiTqmis yvelas movwondi, saxeldobr, muyaiToba,
gulaxdiloba da gulkeTiloba. aravisTvis damiSlia, gadaewera Cemgan,
arasodes ar mqonia didi warmodgena Cems Tavze, yvelas guluxvad vurigebdi
tkbileuls. iqneb am sayovelTao aRtacebas qedmaRali gavexade? iqneb jobia,
rom Sua zeimidan gamomiyvanes da erTferovan, yoveldRiur cxovrebaSi
gadamisroles. magram erT weliwadze meti dro damWirda SevCveodi im azrs,
rom CemiT aRaravinaa aRtacebuli.
ras meZaxdnen skolaSi? yvela oinisa da eSmakobis `moTaves~. yvelgan
pirveli viyavi, arasodes ar vwuwunebdi da ar viRrinebodi. gasakviric araa,
rom yvelas siamovnebas hgvrida gavecilebine skolamde da Cems mimarT
yuradRebiani yofiliyo. uwindeli ane SesaniSnavi gogo iyo, oRond odnav
qarafSuta, dRes ki aRaraferi aqvs CemTan saerTo. peterma Zalian marTebulad
SeniSna:
`adre, roca quCaSi gxvdebodi, yovelTvis ori an sami biWi, anda gogoebis
mTeli jogi gaxlda, mudam icinodi, celqobdi da yuradRebis centrSi iyavi~.
raRa darCa uwindeli anesagan? sicils da moswrebul pasuxebs jer ar
gadaveCvie. iseve kargad, SeiZleba ukeTesadac verkvevi adamianebSi, miyvars
keklucoba... cxadia, roca survili maqvs. minda kidev erTxel, Tundac erTi
saRamo, ramdenime dRe, erTi kvira vicxovro maSindeli udardeli da mxiaruli
cxovrebiT. magram vici, rom erT kviraSi yvelaferi imdenad mombezrdeboda, rom
pirvelive Semxvedris madlieri viqnebodi, oRond seriozulad damlaparakeboda.
arafrad mWirdeba Tayvanismcemlebi, me ufro megobrebi mWirdeba, nu gamoiwvevs
aRtacebas Cemi momxibvleli Rimili, oRond daafason Cemi Sinagani buneba da
xasiaTi. vici, rom megobarTa wre daviwrovdeba, magram eg araferia, Tuki
ramdenime namdvili, gulwrfeli megobari SemrCeba.
Tumca arc im dros viyavi uSfoTvelad bednieri. xSirad martoobasac
vgrZnobdi, magram radgan dilidan saRamomde dakavebuli viyavi, amaze
fiqrisaTvis ar mecala da rac SemeZlo verTobodi. Segnebulad Tu Seugneblad,
vcdilobdi xumrobiT Semevso sicariele. axla minda, Cems uwindel cxovrebas
gadavxedo da muSaobas Sevudge. cxovrebis erTi monakveTi aSkarad
dasrulebulia: aRar damibrundeba skolis udardeli, uzrunveli wlebi. magram
me arc menatreba is dro, aRar Semefereba. mas Semdeg gavizarde. axla aRar
SemiZlia, mxolod udardelad vimxiarulo. Cemi erTi nawili xom mudam
inarCunebs seriozulobas.
Cems arsebobas 1944 wlamde ise vxedav, TiTqos gamadidebeli SuSiT
vuyurebde.
saxlSi mziT savse cxovreba, Semdeg 1942 weli, aq gadmosaxleba,
mkveTri cvlilebebi, Cxubi, braldebebi. me ar SemeZlo swrafad Sevguebodi

amgvar gardatexas, sayrdeni gamomecala da mxolod kadnierebiT vcdilobdi

winaaRmdegobis gawevas.
1943 wlis pirveli naxevari: cremli ar SemSrobia Tvalze, martooba,
TandaTan vxvdebi Cems Secdomebs da naklovanebebs, romlebic mniSvnelovania,
magram me kidev ufro mniSvnelovani meCveneboda. vcdilobdi yvelaferi amexsna,
pimi Cems mxareze gadmomebirebina, magram araferi gamomivida, marto aRmovCndi
rTuli amocanis winaSe: mindoda ise gadavkeTebuliyavi, rom aRar damWireboda
maTi rCeva-darigeba, rasac sasowarkveTilebamde mivyavdi.
amave wlis meore naxevari ukeTesi iyo: wamovizarde, ufro moridebiT
meqceodnen. mets vfiqrobdi, daviwye moTxrobebis wera da im daskvnamde mivedi,
rom sxvas araviTari ufleba ara aqvs, burTiviT aqeT-iqiT gadagisrolos.
gadavwyvite sakuTari nebiT, Cemive daxmarebiT Camovyalibebuliyavi. bolos im
Segnebamde mivedi, rom mama yvelaferSi ver iqneba Cemi mesaidumle. aravis ar
vendobi ufro metad, vidre sakuTar Tavs. axali wlis Semdeg daiwyo meore
didi cvlileba... gaxsovs, Cemi sizmari, mas Semdeg mivxvdi, rom megobari
mWirdeba, magram ara qali, aramed vaJi. mas Semdeg CemSi bedniereba aRmovaCine,
mivxvdi, rom Cemi Tavqarianoba, mxiaruleba mxolod javSania. Semdeg TandaTan
davmSviddi da sikeTisa da silamazisken ltolva vigrZeni.
saRamos loginSi locvas aseTi sityvebiT vamTavreb:
`o, RmerTo, madlobeli var yvelafrisaTvis, rac qveynad kargia da
SesaniSnavi, madlobeli var siyvarulisaTvis~. am dros CemSi yvelaferi zeimobs.
vfiqrob, ra aris `kargi~? kargia, rom Cven gadavrCiT, me rom gamovjanmrTeldi:
`siyvaruli~? siyvaruli peteria da is, rac CvenSi jer imdenad nazi da
mgrZnobiarea, rom Sexebasac ver vbedavT, is, rac odesme mova siyvaruli,
momavali, bedniereba. `SesaniSnavi~? SesaniSnavia samyaro buneba, xelovneba,
silamaze, yvelaferi, rac diadia da mSvenieri.
am dros vfiqrob im saswaulebriv mSvenierebaze, rac TavisTavad arsebobs
da ara ubedurebaze. ai, raSia ZiriTadi gansxvaveba Cemsa da dedas Soris.
damwuxrebul adamians deda ase arigebs: `gaxsovdes, ramdeni ubedureba
trialebs qveyanaze da madlobeli iyavi, rom Senc am dReSi ara xar~. me ki
vetyodi: `gadi gareT, sufTa haerze, gadi da eZebe bedniereba Sens sakuTar
TavSi da RmerTSi. ifiqre, ramdeni mSvenieri ram xdeba Sens sulSi, Sens
irgvliv da iyavi bednieri!~
Cemi azriT, dedis rCeva swori ar unda iyos, aba ra unda qna im
SemTxvevaSi, roca Senc gewveva ubedureba? maSin xom sul daiRupe. me ki
sawinaaRmdego azrisa var. rac unda ubeduri viyo, qveynad mainc arsebobs raRac
mSvenieri: buneba, mze, Tavisufleba da yvelaferi is, rac SenSia. amas unda
CaeWido da maSin sakuTar Tavsac ipovi, RmerTsac da wonasworobasac
SeinarCuneb.
xolo bedniers sxvisi gabednierebac SeuZlia. visac vaJkacoba da rwmena
aqvs, ubedurebaSi ar daiRupeba.
ana
kvira, 12 marti, 1944
Zvirfaso kiwi!
am bolo dros erT adgilze ver vCerdebi. siamovnebiT vesaubrebi peters,
magram mudam imis SiSi maqvs, Tavi ar movabezro. melaparakeba warsulze,
mSoblebze, sakuTar Tavze. me ki mainc yvelaferi mecotaveba.
mere Cems Tavs vekiTxebi ra ufleba maqvs meti moviTxovo. adre peteri
ver mitanda, verc me vitandi. axla me masze azri Semecvala, niSnavs ki es imas,
rom masac unda Secvloda Cemze azri?
me ase mgonia, Tumca es jer kidev imas ar niSnavs, rom Cven ganuyreli
megobrebi varT. me CemdaTavad mirCevnia, ase iyos, maSin ukeT avitandi
karCaketilobas. ar minda, zedmetad gaviRiziano Tavi. isedac bevrs vfiqrob
peterze, Sen raRad unda mogaxvio Tavs Cemi sevdiani fiqrebi.

SabaTs imdenad gamanadgura garedan Semotanilma cudma ambebma, rom

nasadilevs dasaZineblad wamovweqi. Zili, Zili, rom araferze vifiqro. 4
saaTamde meZina, mere mSoblebs mivakiTxe. verc dedas vupasuxe da verc mamas
avuxseni, ratom wamovweqi. bolos Tavis tkivili movimizeze. tyuili ar
miTqvams, Tavi marTlac mtkioda, mtkioda... sadRac SigniT, Rrmad!
normaluri adamianebi, Cemi toli normaluri qaliSvilebi ifiqreben,
cota Seqanebulia da imitom Civis amdenso, magram saqme isaa, rom yvelafers,
rac gulSi maqvs, Sen geubnebi, Semdeg ki mTeli dRe kadnieri, mxiaruli da
sakuTar TavSi darwmunebuli var, vcdilob Tavi avarido yovelgvar SekiTxvebs,
arc sxvebi Sevawuxo da arc sakuTari Tavi.
margo Zalian alersiania da did yuradRebas iCens Cemdami. albaT,
cdilobs Cemi gulis mesaidumle gaxdes, magram me ar SemiZlia yvelaferi
gavando mas. igi sayvareli, keTili da lamazia, magram cota akademiuri.
seriozul sakiTxebze saubrisaTvis ki ubraloebaa saWiro. me seriozulad
meqceva, Zalze seriozulad da albaT, bevrs fiqrobs Tavis Tavqarian daikoze.
rac unda vTqva, gamomcdel mzeras momapyrobs da fiqrobs:
`TvalTmaqcobs Tu marTla am azrisaa?~ Cven aq viwrod vcxovrobT,
erTmaneTs mudam fexebSi vedebiT, me ki mirCevnia, Cemi mesaidumle Sors iyos
Cemgan.
rodis davaRwev Tavs azrTa am qaoss? rodis daisadgurebs CemSi kvlav
simSvide da myudroeba?
ana
samSabaTi, 14 marti, 1944
Zvirfaso kiwi!
me ukve karga xania momwyinda amaze laparaki, magram iqneb Sen
gainteresebs, ra vWameT dRes. am wuTSi van daanebTan vzivar (qveviT
damlagebeli muSaobs) muSambagadafarebul magidasTan da cxvirTan
nelsacxebliT napkuri cxvirsaxoci miWiravs. surneleba cxvirsaxocs saxlidan
gamohyva. me mgoni, es mikibul-mokibuli ambavi ufro dagabnevs, amitom Tavidan
daviwyeb. vinc Cven sasursaTo baraTebiT da sxva saWiro ramiT gvamaragebda,
daiWires. axla aRarc sasursaTo baraTebi gvaqvs da aRarc cximi. mipi da
koophoisi avad arian. eli ki ver iclis da savaWrod ver midis. ase rom,
ganwyobileba cudia, aseve saWmelic. xvalisTvis erTi naWeri qonic ki aRar
gvaqvs, xolo karaqze da margarinze laparakic zedmetia. sauzmeze Semwvari
kartofilis nacvlad (Cven amiT puris ekonomias veweodiT) fafa mogvarTves da
radgan qalbatons eSinia, SimSiliT ar davixocoT, Sav bazarze mouxdeli rZe
ayidina. dRes sadilad gvaqvs kasridan amoRebuli lobio!! amitomac mivide
cxvirze cxvirsaxoci, rogorc sifrTxilis RonisZieba. lobio mTeli weli
kasrSi ido da raRac warmoudgenlad yars. oTaxSi erTmaneTSi areuli dampali
qliavis, sakonservo sunelis da laye kvercxis mkveTri suni trialebs. fu,
roca gavifiqreb, rom es saZagloba unda SevWamo, guli mereva. garda amisa,
Cvens kartofils raRac daavadeba gauCnda da `pomme de terre~1-is (1 kartofili
(frang.).) kalaTidan naxevars sanagve yuTSi vyriT. roca kartofils vfcqvniT,
daavadebis diagnozis dadgenas vcdilobT da verTobiT. bolos davadgineT,
yvelaze metad gavrcelebulia kibo, Savi yvavili da wiTela. arc ise advilia
iatakqveS cxovreba omis meoTxe wels. male mainc moeRos bolo am ubedurebas.
aq rom sxvamxriv cota ukeTesi pirobebi iyos, sakvebis uqonloba amis
naxevradac ar Semawuxebda. magram ZaRlis Tavi swored aqaa damarxuli. am
erTferovanma cxovrebam yvelas tvini Segviryia. ai, ras ambobs Cveni
TavSesafris xuTive ufrosi wevri Cvens cxovrebaze:
qalbatoni van daani: `didi xania mombezrda samzareulos ferias roli.
roca saqme araferi maqvs, mwyindeba, amitomac vamzadeb kerZs. magram kerZis
damzadeba ucximod SeuZlebelia! cudi suni guls mirevs. vSromob, madlobis
magier ki ukmayofileba da sayveduri mesmis. yvelasaTvis me var TeTri yvavi,
yvela me madanaSaulebs. garda amisa, darwmunebuli var, rom oms bolo ar

moeReba, SeiZleba germanelebma moigon kidec omi. saSinlad maSinebs is, rom
SimSiliT davixocebiT. ra gasakviria, Tu mudam karg xasiaTze ara var~.
batoni vand daani:
`minda movwio, movwio da kidev erTxel movwio. maSin yvelaferi asatania:
politikac, sakvebic da kerlis Wirveulobac. xolo roca mosawevi ara maqvs,
xorci mainc unda mqondes sadilad. Tu ara da cxovreba autanelia, yvelafers
viwuneb da yvelasTan vCxubob, kerli ki saocrad suleli qali mgonia.
qalbatoni franki: `sakvebi ar aris mTavari, magram saSinlad mSia da
erTi naWeri Wvavis puri menatreba. me rom qalbaton van daanis adgilze viyo,
didi xania gadavaCvevdi Cems qmars amdeni papirosis wevas, magram axla momeci,
geTayva, erTi sigareti, iqneb nervebi davimSvido... ingliselebs bevri Secdoma
mosdiT, magram frontze saqme mainc kargad midis. marTals Tu maTqmevinebT,
mixaria, rom poloneTSi ara var~.
batoni franki: `yvelaferi rigzea, me araferi ar minda. mTavaria simSvide.
dro jer wina gvaqvs. Tu kartofils maWmevT, savsebiT kmayofili viqnebi, oRond
Cemi ulufidan cota elis gadaunaxeT~.
batoni duseli: `droze unda davamTavro Cemi disertacia. politika?
didebulia! Cven aq aRmogvaCenen? SeuZlebelia!~ me, me, me...
ana
oTxSabaTi, 15 marti, 1944
Zvirfaso kiwi!
uh... oh... oh... mTeli dRe mxolod es ismis: `Tu esa da es moxda, namdvili
gaWirveba maSin naxeT... xolo Tu isic avad gaxda, qveyanaze momxedavi aRar
gveyoleba... da Tu kidev...~, erTi sityviT, gagrZeleba SegiZlia TviTon
warmoidgino. me mgonia, Sen am xnis ganmavlobaSi kargad gaicani yvela
`iatakqveSeli~ da ar gagiWirdeba mixvde, vin ras ambobs.
am `Tu, Tu~-s mizezi isaa, rom batoni kraleri Sromis begaris
mosaxdelad gaiwvies, eli gacivda, mips jerac ar mouxdia gripi, xolo baton
koophioss mZime sisxlis dena daewyo kuWidan da xandaxan guli uwuxdeba.
saSineli ambavia.
sawyobis mosamsaxureebi xval isveneben da Tu eli Sin darCa, Cven karis
gaRebas ver movaxerxebT. TagvebiviT gasusulebi unda visxdeT, rom mezoblebma
araferi gaigonon. pirvel saaTze henki mova, rom daxedos mitovebulebs da ase
vTqvaT, zooparkis darajis roli Seasrulos... dRes zogi ram gviambo
garesamyaroze. didi xania ar gvsmenia, ra xdeba am kedlebs iqiT; rom genaxa, ra
xarbad vusmendiT. aris aseTi suraTi `bebias zRaprebi~, imas vgavdiT.
jer erTi ambavi ar hqonda moTavebuli da meoreze gadadioda, cxadia,
sakvebzec vilaparakeT, bolos mipis mkurnal eqimze SeCerda:
`eqimi? eqimze nurafers mkiTxavT! am diliT davureke, rogorc iqna,
telefonTan asistenti movida. gripiani avadmyofisaTvis recepti vTxove da
iciT, ra mipasuxa: rvidan cxris naxevramde gamoiareT da waiReTo. Tu gripi
mZime formaSi gaqvs, telefonTan, albaT, TviTon eqimi modis da geubneba: aba,
gamoyaviT ena... TqviT a-aaa... yvelaferi gasagebia, yeli gaqvT gawiTlebuli,
recepts afTiaqs gadavugzavni, midiT da wamali wamoiReT. naxvamdis! wertili
dasmulia. rogor mogwonT amgvari mkurnaloba? momsaxureba telefonis
saSualebiT!~
Tumca didad ver vusayvedureb eqimebs, bolos da bolos TiToeuls
mxolod ori xeli aqvs, axla ki, samwuxarod, pacientebis ricxvi maqsimums
aRwevs, eqimebisa ki minimums. magram Cven mainc TavSeukaveblad vxarxarebdiT,
roca henkma eqimTan telefoniT saubari gadmogvca. advili warmosadgenia,
rogor gamoiyureba axla eqimis mosacdeli oTaxi. ufaso pacientebs axla zed
aravin uyurebs, xolo im adamianebs, romelTac seriozuli araferi sWirT da
mxolod wuwuni uyvarT, dRes, albaT, aseT rames eubnebian: `ra dagrCenia aq,
dadeqi boloSi, jer is unda gauSva, vinc marTla avadaa!~
ana

xuTSabaTi, 16 marti, 1944

Zvirfaso kiwi!
SesaniSnavi amindia, axlave aval sxvenze.
axla ki vici, ratom var peterze ufro mousvenari, mas sakuTari oTaxi
aqvs, sadac ocnebobs, fiqrobs da sZinavs. me ki oTaxidan magdeben. Cems oTaxSi
duseli cxovrobs, amitom verasodes ver vrCebi marto, Tumca marto darCena
saocrad minda. esaa erT-erTi mizezi imisa, rom mudam zeviT gavrbivar. mxolod
iq, zeviT, da SenTan saubarSi vpoulob kvlav sakuTar Tavs, kiwi! magram ase ar
unda moveSva, piriqiT meti mxneoba unda gamoviCino. sabednierod, veravin amCnevs
Cems gancdebs, mxolod esaa, rom dedis mimarT ufro gulcivi gavxdi, aRarc
mamas veqcevi Zveleburad, nazad, margos ki gulaxdilad aRarafers veubnebi.
Cems TavSi Cavikete, magram garegnuli TavdaWera aucileblad unda SevinarCuno.
aravin ar unda icodes, ra brZola mimdinareobs CemSi, Cems gonebasa da Cems
survilebs Soris. aqamde mudam goneba imarjvebda, magram iqneb odesme
mimtyunos. zogjer meSinia amis, zogjer ki vnatrob!
Zalian minda velaparako amaze peters, magram vici, rom pirvelad man unda
daiwyos. ra Znelia, roca saubars sizmarSi daiwyeb da gamofxizlebisas
gagrZelebis saSualeba ara gaqvs. ra samwuxaroa, rom sizmarSi gancdili
sinamdviled ar iqceva. diax, kiwi! Seni ane cotaTi Seqanda! magram me xom
aranormalur droSi da aranormalur garemoSi vcxovrob! sixaruls mxolod is
maniWebs, rom Cemi fiqrebisa da grZnobebis gadmocema SemiZlia, Torem sul
davixrCobodi.
neta peteri ras fiqrobs yovelive amaze? me mainc mjera, rom male am
sakiTxze gveqneba saubari. albaT bevr rames xvdeba kidec, radgan ane, romelsac
aqamde icnobda, ar moewoneboda. rogor SeiZleba, simSvidisa da siwynaris
moyvaruls Cemi daudegari, mousvenari xasiaTi moswondes! nuTu igi erTaderTi
kacia, romelmac Cemi qvis niRbis qveS pirvelma Seixeda? nuTu dainaxa, ra
imaleba mis ukan? marTals ambobs Zveli WeSmariteba: siyvaruls xSirad
TanagrZnoba iwvevs, xolo bolos orive erTmaneTs erwymiso. mec aseve momdis?
xSirad peteri iseve mecodeba rogorc sakuTari Tavi.
ar vici, marTla ar vici, rogor vipovo pirveli sityva. raRa qnas
peterma, romelsac Cemze ufro uWirs laparaki. neta miwera SemeZlos! maSin imas
mainc gaigebda, risi Tqmac minda, da rac ase Zneli gamosaxatavia sityvebiT!
ana
paraskevi, 17 marti, 1944
Zvirfaso kiwi!
TavSesafarma SvebiT amoisunTqa. kraleri gaanTavisufles, eli moeria
Tavis surdos da axla Zveleburad Tavs dagvtrialebs. yvelaferi rigzea,
mxolod esaa, rom margos da me Cvenma mSoblebma cota Tavi mogvabezres. cudad
nu gamigeb, xom ici, zogjer rogor miWirs dedasTan saerTo enis gamonaxva. mama
ki, mama winandeburad miyvars. margos erTnairad uyvars orive. magram Cvens
asakSi TviTon ginda iyo Seni Tavis ufrosi da dedis kalTas moscilde. Tu
zeviT avedi, mkiTxaven, ra gindodao. minda, kerZs marili davayaro, ar
SeiZlebao. yovel saRamos zustad cxris naxevarze deda mekiTxeba, gaxdas
ratom ar iwyebo. yovel wigns, romlis wakiTxva minda, jer TviTon
gadaaTvaliereben. marTali giTxra cenzura maincdamainc mkacri araa da
yvelafris wakiTxvis uflebas maZleven, magram kontroli, uamravi SeniSvnebi da
miTiTebebi orives mogvbezrda. gansakuTrebiT me maxasiaTebs bevri ram iseTi,
rac Cems mSoblebs ar eWaSnikebaT, magram me bavSvi aRara var. ar minda `aq
makoce, iq makoce~, arc bavSvis mosaferebeli saxelebi mWirdeba. es yvelaferi
metismetad daTafluli meCveneba. ase rom, mcire xniT siamovnebiT gaveclebodi
moyvarul, mzrunvel mSoblebs. guSin margom aseTi ram miTxra: `pirdapir
sasaciloa, sakmarisia, Tavi xelebze daayrdno, maSinve gekiTxebian: Tavi xom ar
gtkiva, cudad xom ara xar~.

Cven orive didad ganvicdiT, roca vxedavT, Tu ra darCa Cveni myudro

harmoniuli ojaxisgan. amis mizezi isaa, rom Cveni aqauri urTierToba
yovelmxriv arabunebrivia. me imis Tqma minda, rom Cven xSirad ise gveqcevian,
rogorc bavSvebs, sinamdvileSi ki Sinaganad bevrad gavuswariT Cvens tolebs.
Tumca me mxolod ToTxmeti wlisa var, magram Zalian kargad vici, ra minda,
vinaa marTali da vin mtyuani. maqvs sakuTari Tvalsazrisi, sakuTari aRqma,
principebi. iqneb mozardis amgvari gancxadeba zedmeti TavdajerebulobiT
axsnan, magram me adamianad ufro vgrZnob Cems Tavs, vidre bavSvad. vgrZnob, rom
sruliad damoukidebeli var yvelasagan, sul erTia, vinc unda iyos igi.
me vici, rom dedaze ukeTesad SemiZlia kamaTi da sakuTari mosazrebebis
damtkiceba, radgan masze ufro obieqturi var da maincdamainc ar miyvars
gazviadeba, masze ufro organizebuli, masze ufro marjve... SegiZlia icino,
ramdenic ginda! zogjer vgrZnob, rom dedaze bevrad maRla vdgavar. Tu vinme
miyvars, upirveles yovlisa, minda aRtacebuli viyo misiT, pativs vcemde!
yvelaferi kargad iqneboda, peteri rom Cemi megobari gamxdariyo. igi marTlac
iwvevs CemSi aRtacebas, saocrad sayvareli adamiania!
ana
kvira, 19 marti, 1944
Zvirfaso kiwi!
guSindel dRes didi mniSvneloba hqonda CemTvis. gadavwyvite, sanam
sadilad davsxdebodiT, gulaxdilad movlaparakebodi peters da CurCuliT
vkiTxe: saRamos stenografiaSi imecadineb?
ara, mipasuxa man.
salaparako maqvs SenTan.
Zalian kargi!
WurWeli davrecxe da zrdilobis gamo cota xans kidev vijeqi
mSoblebTan. Semdeg peterTan avedi. igi Ria fanjarasTan idga marcxniv. me
marjvniv gavCerdi. bevrad ukeTesia naxevradbnelSi saubari, vidre sinaTleze. me
mgonia, peteric ase fiqrobs.
Cven imdeni ram vuambeT erTmaneTs, imdeni, rom yvelafris dawera
SeuZlebelia. magram ra kargi iyo, ukeTesi saRamo aq gadmosaxlebis Semdeg ar
mqonia. zog rames mainc gadmogcem mokled. jer vsaubrobdiT Cvenebis
kinklaobaze, rasac me axla sul sxva TvaliT vuyureb, Semdeg mSoblebTan
Sinagan gaTiSulobaze. bevri ram vuTxari peters mamaze, dedaze, margoze da
sakuTar Tavze. uecrad man mkiTxa: roca erTmaneTs `Rame mSvidobisas~ eubnebiT,
aucileblad kocniT erTmaneTs?
ra Tqma unda, da ara erTxel! Tqvenc, ara?
ara, me jer TiTqmis arasodes aravisTvis mikocnia.
arc dabadebis dReze?
dabadebis dReze ki!
Cven aRvniSneT, rom sruli ndobiT ar vekidebiT mSoblebs. van daanebs
Turme didad swadiaT daimsaxuron Svilis ndoba, magram peters Tavi ganze
uWiravs. me vTqvi, rom mwuxarebas cremlebiT viqarveb baliSSi TavCarguli, is
ki Turme sxvenze adis da ilanZReba. vuTxari, rom me da margom namdvilad
mxolod axla gavicaniT erTmaneTi, magram bolomde gulaxdilni mainc ara
varT, radgan sul erTad gvixdeba yofna. raze ar vilaparakeT. TiTqmis
yvelaferze da is swored iseTi iyo, rogoric warmodgenaSi mesaxeboda.
mere gavixseneT 1942 weli. maSin Cven imdenad sxva adamianebi viyaviT, rom
axla TiTqmis veRar vcnobT Cvens Tavs. pirvelad ver vitandiT erTmaneTs.
peteri me mousvenar da usiamo arsebad mTvlida. kargs mec verafers vxedavdi
masSi. maSin me ar mesmoda, ratom ar mearSiyeboda, magram axla mixaria. miTxra
isic, Tu rogor ganudga yvelas. me ki vupasuxe, rom Cems cocxal bunebasa da
mis simSvides Soris arc ise didi sxvaobaa, rom zogjer mec Zalian menatreba
siCume, magram mxolod Cemi dRiuri maZlevs ganmartoebis saSualebas. Cven

gamovutydiT erTmaneTs: mas axarebs, rom Cemi mSoblebi aq Svilebianad

gadmosaxldnen, me ki misi aq yofna mgvris siamovnebas. axla me kargad mesmis
misi ganmartoebis mizezi, misi damokidebuleba mSoblebTan da siamovnebiT
davexmarebi.
Sen me isedac mexmarebi, miTxra man.
mainc riT? vkiTxe me.
Seni simxiaruliT!
ukeTess verafers metyoda! saocrad mesiamovna, peterma ukve iswavla Cemi,
rogorc kargi amxanagis, dafaseba da jerjerobiT meti araferi minda. sityvebi
ar myofnis imis gamosaTqmelad, Tu ra bednieri da madlieri var, magram SenTan
bodiSs vixdi kiwi, rom dRes Cemi stili Cveulebrivze uxeiroa.
davwere yvelaferi, rac enaze momadga. axla ki iseTi grZnoba maqvs,
TiTqos me da peters saidumlo gvakavSirebs. roca Semomcqeris, micinis an
Tvals mikravs, CemSi TiTqos Suqi inTeba. minda yvelaferi aseve darCes, minda
bevri, bevri bednieri saaTi gavataroT erTad!
Seni madlieri da bednieri ana.
orSabaTi, 20 marti, 1944
Zvirfaso kiwi!
am diliT peterma mkiTxa, saRamos Tu amoxvalo da Tan dasZina, namdvilad
araferSi ar miSli xels, Cems oTaxSi orive Tavisuflad daveteviTo. me ki
vupasuxe, rom yovel saRamos masTan asvla ar ivargebs, radgan danarCenebs
amdeni stumroba uwesobad miaCniaT. nu miaqcev maT laparaks yuradRebas, mirCia
man. davpirdi, SabaTs saRamoTi moval-meTqi da vTxove eTqva, rodis daiwyeba
mTvariani Rameebi.
`aucileblad~, mipasuxa man, `Cven dabla CavalT da iqidan davakvirdebiT
mTvares~.
magram Cems bednierebas uecrad Crdili moefina. me karga xania vfiqrob,
rom peteri margosac SesaniSnav ymawvilad miaCnia. ar vici, uyvars Tu ara,
magram me mainc ar msiamovnebs. yovelTvis, roca peterTan var, iseTi grZnoba
maqvs, TiTqos margos tkivils vayeneb. margos Tavi SesaniSnavad uWiravs da
arafers gvagrZnobinebs. me mis adgilas eWvianobisagan Tavs davkargavdi. margo
ki meubneba, nu Semibralebo.
me mgonia, lamazi araa, roca Sen CvenTan xelisSemSlel, mesame pirad
grZnob Tavs.
me amas SeCveuli var, mipasuxa man, Tan mis xmaSi mware naRveli
igrZnoboda. jer ver vbedav, es ambavi peters vuambo. SeiZleba vuTxra mere,
mogvianebiT. axla ki bevri salaparako gvaqvs. guSin dedam Semomkra. es me
davimsaxure. miuxedavad mis mimarT gulgrili damokidebulebisa, amdenad mainc
ar unda gavkadnierebuliyavi. vecdebi, ukeT daviWiro Tavi, rac unda moxdes,
alersianad moveqcevi, aRar mivcem SeniSvnebs, sul erTia, amas araviTari Sedegi
ar moaqvs.
pimic nakleb alersiania, cdilobs aRar momeqces ise, rogorc bavSvs da
amitom metismetad civia. vnaxoT, rogorc wava saqme!
kmara! aRarafris Tavi ara maqvs. mudam peters Sevcqeri TvalebSi da guli
sixaruliT mevseba!
margos sikeTis dadastureba: ai, ra miviRe dRes, 1944 wlis 20 marts: `ane,
guSin roca giTxari, ar veWvianob-meTqi, naxevrad marTali viyavi. saqme isaa, rom
me arc Senze veWvianob da ar peterze, magram guli mwydeba, rom aqamde ver
vipove da, albaT, verc vipovi iseT adamians, romelsac Cems fiqrebsa da
grZnobebs gavuziarebdi. mixaria, rom Tqven erTmaneTis ndoba moipoveT. Sen aq
isedac bevri ram gaklia iseTi, rac sxvebs aqvT da ver amCneven.
garda amisa, me vici, rom peterTan arasodes ar meqneboda amgvari
damokidebuleba, radgan adamianTan, romelsac yvelafers eubnebi, Zalian axlos
unda iyo. me unda vigrZno, rom mas usityvod esmis Cemi bolomde, igi sulierad
Cemze maRla unda idges, peteri ki aseTi ar aris. magram Seni da peteris

megobroba gasagebia. amitom, nu fiqrob TiTqos raRacas marTmev, TiTqos

mawyenine, ara, ase araa. Tqven ki Tqveni megobroba bevr sikeTes mogitanT!~
Cemi pasuxi:
`Zvirfaso margo!
Seni werili araCveulebrivad sasiamovnoa, magram me mainc ver davmSviddi
da albaT verc davmSviddebi verasodes.
iseT ndobaze, rogorsac Sen gulisxmob, Cemsa da peters Soris laparakic
ki ar yofila, magram bnelSi, Ria fanjarasTan ufro advilia saubari, vidre
dRisiT mzis sinaTleze. grZnobebis gamoxatvasac ufro CurCuli uxdeba, vidre
mTeli qveynis gasagonad yvirili.
me mgoni, peteri Senc giyvars daZmuri siyvaruliT da iseTive didi
siamovnebiT daexmarebodi mas, rogorc me. miuxedavad imisa, rom Tqvens Soris
ar aris iseTi ndoba, rogorsac Cven vgulisxmobT, SeiZleba odesme daexmaro
kidec, ndoba ormxrivi unda iyos. vfiqrob swored esaa imis mizezi, Tu ratom
veRar velaparakebi mamas gulaxdilad.
modi nuRar SevexebiT am Temas da gTxov, nuRarafers metyvi amaze. xolo
Tu raime kidev gaqvs saTqmeli momwere. mec werilobiT ufro mexerxeba Cemi
azrebis gamoxatva, vidre sityvebiT. Sen ver warmoidgen, ra aRtacebas iwvev
CemSi. imedi maqvs, rom odesme odnav mainc dagemgvanebiT Sen da mamas sikeTiT.
xolo am mxriv Tqven erTmaneTs gavxarT~.
ana
oTxSabaTi, 22 marti, 1944
Zvirfaso kiwi!
guSin saRamos margosagan es werili miviRe:
`Zvirfaso ane!
mas Semdeg, rac Seni guSindeli werili wavikiTxe, iseTi STabeWdileba
Semeqmna, TiTqos roca peterTan adixar samuSaod an salaparakod, sindisis
qenjna gawuxebs. magram saamisod araviTari safuZveli ar arsebobs. Cemi ndobis
mosapoveblad garkveuli urTierTobaa saWiro, amisTvis ki peteri ar gamodgeba.
mis mimarT me swored iseTi grZnoba maqvs, rogoric Sen aRniSne. peters TiTqmis
ise vuyureb, rogorc Zmas, magram... umcros Zmas! Cven rqebgamoSveril lokokinebs
vgavarT, romlebic SexebiT cdiloben gaarkvion, eyvarebaT Tu ara odesme
erTmaneTi daZmuri siyvaruliT, magram jer saqme aqamde ar misula.
amitom ar unda gebralebode. dastkbi im megobrobiT, rac moipove~.
cxovreba ki sul ufro mSvenieri xdeba. ici, kiwi! Cven am TavSesafarSi
namdvili didi siyvarulis gancda mogvelis, magram me ar vfiqrob imaze,
gavyvebi Tu ara odesme colad, radgan ar vici, rogori iqneba, roca gaizrdeba.
arc is vici, Tu gveyvareba erTmaneTi momavalSi ise, rom daqorwineba
movisurvoT. Tumca axla darwmunebuli var, rom movwonvar, magram ar vici,
rogor, rogorc kargi amxanagi, romelic enatreba, rogorc qali, Tu rogorc
dis magieri, amaSi me jer ver gavrkveulvar.
Zalian gamexarda, roca miTxra, rom CemTan erTad ufro iolad itans im
ayal-mayals, romelic maTTan xSirad xdeba. Cemi azriT, es ukve win gadadgmuli
nabijia Cvens megobrobaSi. guSin vkiTxe, ras izamda, aq rom aTiode ane iyos da
wamdauwum amodiodnen masTan. `yvela Tu SenisTana iqneba, rogorme avitandi~,
mipasuxa man.
peteri mudam stumarTmoyvarea da me mgoni, Cemi misvla axarebs. bejiTad
swavlobs franguls. saRamosac ki, aTi saaTis Semdeg, sawolSi. o, roca SabaTis
saRamo magondeba, Cveni saubari, Cveni ganwyobileba, am xnis manZilze mxolod
pirvelad var kmayofili sakuTari TaviT. arc erT Cems naTqvam sityvas ar
vnanob, rogorc es Cveulebriv xSirad xdeba. roca icinis, lamazia, xolo roca
wynaradaa, Zalian sayvareli da kargi. Cemi azriT, pirdapir gancvifrebuli
darCa, roca mixvda, rom me ara var amqveynad yvelaze qarafSuta gogo, rom mec

masaviT meocnebe arseba var, rom mec iseve ganvicdi yvela siZneles, rogorc
igi.
Cemi pasuxi:
`Zvirfaso margo!
yvelafers jobia, davicadoT, vnaxoT, ra moxdeba. ar SeiZleba, didxans
gagrZeldes ase, male Cemsa da peters Soris ase Tu ise yvelaferi gairkveva. me
ar vici, rogor ganviTardeba movlenebi da odnavadac ar vixedebi win, magram
erT rames mainc gavakeTeb ise, rom Sen arc ki gkiTxav: roca me da peteri
namdvilad davmegobrdebiT, vetyvi, rom Senc mogwons da Tu saWiro iqna,
yvelaferSi daexmarebi. ar vici, ras fiqrobs peteri Senze, magram aucileblad
vkiTxav. me mgoni, cudi azrisa ar unda iyos, piriqiT! SegiZlia Tavisuflad
moxvide CvenTan zeviT da saerTod yvelgan, sadac Cven viqnebiT. darwmunebuli
iyavi, xels ar SegviSli, radgan Cven xmisamouReblad SevTanxmdiT, rom
gulaxdili saubari gveqneba mxolod saRamoobiT, bnelSi. guls nu gaitex! mec
medgrad vdgavar, iqneb Seni droc movides. da ufro malec, vidre Sen fiqrob!~
ana
xuTSabaTi, 23 marti, 1944
Zvirfaso kiwi!
nel-nela yvelaferi mowesrigda. Cveni `spekulantebi~, sabednierod,
cixidan gamouSves! mipi guSindels aqeT kvlav CvenTanaa, elis xvelam gauara,
mxolod koophoiss mouwevs kidev didxans saxlSi jdoma. guSin Cvens Tavze
TviTmfrinavi Camoagdes, mfrinavebi gadarCnen, TviTmfrinavi ki skolas daeca.
sabednierod, bavSvebi skolaSi ar iyvnen, magram cecxli gaCnda da amboben,
msxverplic ariso. germanelebi umowyalod esrodnen mfrinavebs, romlebic
paraSutiT eSvebodnen. mosaxleoba gaacofa aseTma laCrulma sisastikem. Cven, me
vgulisxmob mSiSara qalebs, saSinlad SegveSinda. Cemi azriT, srola
saZaglobaa.
axla me xSirad avdivar zeviT peterTan da mis oTaxSi sufTa haeriT
vsunTqav. sasiamovnoa mis gverdiT jdoma da fanjaraSi yureba. roca oTaxidan
gavdivar, van daansa da dusels ar SeuZliaT, binZuri xumroba ar gamomayolon.
`anam meore saxli ipova~, amboben isini, anda: `gana wesia, axalgazrda kacma
axalgazrda qali saRamoobiT bnel oTaxSi miiRos?~ am `gonebamaxvilur~
SeniSvnebs peteri saocari gulgrilobiT Rebulobs. dedamissac ainteresebs,
raze vlaparakobT, siamovnebiT gamogvkiTxavda, magram gawbilebis eSinia. peteri
ambobs, ufrosebs SurT Cveni axalgazrdoba da guli mosdiT, rom yuradRebas
ar vaqcevT maT xumrobas. zogjer peteri CvenTan Camodis dabla, cdilobs Tavi
Seikavos, magram sircxvilisagan mainc kibosaviT wiTldeba da xmas ver iRebs.
albaT, Zalian usiamo grZnobaa!
mama ambobs, vipranWebi, magram marTali araa. me mxolod Zalian
pativmoyvare var. aqamde aravis ar uTqvams CemTvis, lamazi xaro, mxolod erTma
biWma miTxra skolaSi, roca icini, sasiamovno saxe gaqvso. guSin peterma
namdvili komplimenti miTxra da minda, Cveni saubari gadmogce. peteri xSirad
meubneba: `aba gaicine!~ es me meniSna da vkiTxe: ratom mTxov, gavicino?
imitom rom momwons. loyebze fosoebi giCndeba, netav risgan?
ara, es ar aris marTali!
rogor ara, me vici rom lamazi gogo ara var, arasodes ar vyofilvar
da arc arasodes viqnebi!
me srulebiTac ar vfiqrob ase, Cemi azriT, Sen lamazi xar!
tyuilia!
raki me vambob, SegiZlia damijero.
me, ra Tqma unda, vupasuxe, rom isic lamazi ymawvilia. yvela Cvens uecar
damegobrebaze laparakobs, magram Cven mSoblebis miTqma-moTqmas yuradRebas ar
vaqcevT. maTi yoveli SeniSvna uxamsobaa. nuTu Cvens mSoblebs axalgazrdoba

gadaaviwydaT? mgoni, marTlac asea! roca Cven vxumrobT, seriozulad gveqcevian,

xolo roca raimes seriozulad aRviqvamT, dagvcinian!
ana
orSabaTi, 27 marti, 1944
Zvirfaso kiwi!
`Cveni iatakqveSa cxovrebis istoriaSi~ didi adgili unda daTmoboda
politikas, magram me politika maincdamainc ar mainteresebs da uyuradRebod
mivatove. amitom minda mTeli werili am sakiTxs davuTmo.
TavisTavad gasagebia, rom am problemis irgvliv sxvadasxva, erTmaneTis
sawinaaRmdego azri arsebobs. gasagebia isic, rom am Cvens areul, omianobis
droSi gauTaveblad politikaze laparakoben. yvelaferi es logikuria, magram...
politikis gamo amdeni Cxubi da dava sisulelea.
dae, sanaZlo dadon, icinon, lanZRon, TaTxon erTmaneTi, rac undaT, is
akeTon, ra menaRvleba, kiseric utexiaT! oRond nu iCxubeben, radgan amas mudam
cudi Sedegi mosdevs. garedan Semosul adamianebs xSirad araswori ambebi
moaqvT. Cvens radios jer tyuili ar uTqvams, magram henki, mipi, koophoisi,
kraleri da eli movlenebs sakuTari ganwyobilebis mixedviT afaseben, xolo
maTi ganwyobileba metismetad cvalebadia, Tumca yvelaze naklebad mainc henks
ecvleba guneba.
Cveni TavSesafris politikuri ganwyobileba mudam erTnairia.
gauTavebeli kamaTi gadmosxdomaze, bombardirebaze, ministrebis mier
warmoTqmul sityvebze da a. S. amave dros gesmis sxvadasxvagvari Tvalsazrisi:
`SeuZlebelia!..~ `RmerTo Cemo, kidec rom daiwyon, rodisRa gaTavdeba?..~
`yvelaferi brwyinvaled mimdinareobs, SesaniSnavad, ukeTess verc isurveb~.
yvela dauRalavad gamoTqvams Tavis azrs, optimistebi, pesimistebi, da
rac mTavaria realistebi. da rogorc yovelTvis xdeba, TiToeuli maTgani
fiqrobs, rom marTali mxolod TviTonaa. Cveni qalbatoni gagulisebulia, rom
misi meuRle didi ndobiT ekideba ingliselebs. misi sayvareli meuRle ki cols
ujavrdeba, aqaoda, mis saTayvano ers dascinis da abuCad igdebs.
am dros arc is axsovT, Tu ras hqvia mowyena. me erTi utyuari saSualeba
movigone: minaxavs, adamians nemss uCxvleten da wamoxteba. zustad ase moqmedebs
Cemi saSualeba. sakmarisia, erTi sityva wamomcdes politikaze da mTeli ojaxi
maxeSia gabmuli.
TiTqos ar kmaroda germaniis sardlobis da bi-bi-sis gadacemebi, am bolo
dros SemoiRes specialuri gadacema `mdgomareoba haerSi~, rac Zalian
sainteresoa, magram xSirad guls gvitexs. ingliselebma TavianTi sahaero
Zalebi namdvil konveierad gadaaqcies, mofrinaven dRisiTac da RamiTac (ise
rogorc germanelebi tyuian dRec da Ramec). radios dilaadrian vusmenT, mere
yovel saaTs: saRamos 9 an 10 saaTamde, zogjer TerTmetamdec, rac imas
amtkicebs, rom Tumca ufrosebs moTmineba didi aqvT, magram mosazrebis unari
akliaT (aris gamonaklisic, magram ar davasaxeleb). me mgoni, savsebiT
sakmarisia, mousmino radios dReSi erTxel an ukidures SemTxvevaSi orjer!
isini ki jer gadacemis programas ismenen, Semdeg frank filipss `oranes~
radiosadgurebi, mere usmenen mis udidebulesobas dedofals. yvela gamodis
rigrigobiT da yvelas hyavs yuradRebiani msmenelebi. Tu Cvenebs ar sZinavT da
ar Wamen, radiosTan sxedan da saWmelze, Zilze da, rac mTavaria, politikaze
laparakoben. o, ra mosawyenia, ase SeiZleba damWknar dedabers daemsgavso!
ai idealuri magaliTi. sityvas ambobs uinston CerCili, romelsac
yvelani pativs vcemT.
kvira, saRamos 9 saaTia, Cai mzadaa da xufqveS dgas. Semodian stumrebi da
radiomimRebis irgvliv sxdebian. duseli marcxniv, van daani pirdapir, peteri
marjvniv, deda van daanis gverdiT, qalbatoni van daani maT ukan, pimi, me da
margo magidasTan. mamakacebi ewevian. peters daZabulobisagan Tvalebi exuWeba.
muq grZel xalaTSi gamowyobili deda da qalbatoni van daani kankaleben,
radgan miuxedavad CerCilis gamosvlisa, TviTmfrinavebi Tamamad mifrinaven

Cvens Tavze ruris olqis mimarTulebiT. mama Cais Seeqceva. me da margo

xelixelgadaxveulebi vsxedvarT, radgan orives kalTaSi mZinare muSi gviwevs.
margos Tmebi bigudebze dauxvevia. me mokle da viwro piJama macvia, irgvliv
sruli siCume, simSvide, ojaxuri simyudrove sufevs. diaxac, am saRamos asea.
Tumca me yovelTvis daZabuli velodebi, ra moxdeba. ufrosebs moTmineba ar
hyofniT bolomde moisminon sityva, mouTmenlad afratuneben fexebs. eCqarebaT
imsjelon imaze, rac CerCilma Tqva, da iqamde kbenen erTmaneTs, sanam Cxubi da
dava ayalmayalSi ar gadadis.
ana
samSabaTi, 28 marti, 1944
Zvirfaso kiwi!
SemeZlo meti meambna politikaze, magram dRes bevri ram unda gacnobo.
jer erTi, dedam kategoriulad amikrZala zeviT xSirad siaruli, radgan
hgonia, rom qalbatoni van daani Cemze eWvianobs. meorec, peterma margos sTxova,
CemTan erTad evlo masTan. ar vici, zrdilobis gamo, Tu marTla ase surs.
mesame, mamas vkiTxe, unda gavuwio angariSi qalbaton van daanis eWvianobas Tu
ara. mama fiqrobs, rom ara. rogor moviqce? deda javrobs da eWvianobs kidec
cotaTi. mama kmayofilia Cemi da peteris megobrobiT da uxaria, Cven rom ase
kargad veguebiT erTmaneTs. margosac peteri SesaniSnav ymawvilad miaCnia,
magram grZnobs, rom samSi ar SeiZleba imaze laparaki, rac mxolod ors exeba.
deda fiqrobs, rom peters vuyvarvar. gulaxdilad rom vTqva, me vocnebob kidec
amaze, maSin Cven Tanabar mdgomareobaSi viqnebodiT da ufro Tamamad da
gulaxdilad visaubrebdiT. deda imasac ambobs, rom peteri Tvals ar macilebs.
Tumca es marTalia. marTalia isic, rom Cven xandaxan Tvals vukravT erTmaneTs
da rom mas Cems loyebze fosoebis gamoCena ainteresebs! rogor ggonia, ra
SemiZlia gavakeTo aseT mdgomareobaSi?
saerTod ki cud dReSi var. deda Cems winaaRmdegaa ganwyobili, me ki mis
winaaRmdeg. mamas ar unda dainaxos Cveni usityvo brZola. deda Sewuxebulia,
radgan mainc vuyvarvar; me es naklebad mawuxebs, radgan vgrZnob, rom srulebiT
ar esmis Cemi. xolo peteri... peters veravis davuTmob. SesaniSnavi ymawvilia,
aRtacebas iwvevs CemSi. Cven SeiZleba saucxoo megobrebi gavxdeT. ra undaT am
`bebrebs~, ras Crian cxvirs yvelgan? sabednierod, me SeveCvie Cemi Sinagani
gancdebis dafarvas da ioladac vaxerxeb, ar SevamCnevino maT, Tu ra Zlier
miyvars peteri! nuTu arafers metyvis? nuTu arasodes ar vigrZnob misi loyis
Sexebas ise, rogorc maSin sizmarSi, petelTan? peteli da peteri! Tqven CemTvis
erTni xarT! maT Cveni ar esmiT. ver gaugiaT, rom Cven imiTac varT kmayofili,
roca xmaamouRebliv erTmaneTis gverdiT vsxedvarT, ar esmiT, ra gvizidavs
erTmaneTisaken. rodis gadavlaxavT mTel am dabrkolebas? da mainc kargia, rom
raRac gvaqvs gadasalaxavi, radgan bolo ufro kargi iqneba! roca peteri
xelebze Tavdayrdnobili da TvaldaxuWuli zis bavSvs hgavs, roca muSis
eTamaSeba Zalze alersiania, roca kartofiliT savse tomrebs an sxva rames
ezideba Ronieri, xolo roca qalaqis dabombvas uyurebs, anda bnelSi dabla
Cadis, raTa darwmundes, qurdebi xom ar Semoparulan, guladi. magram me
yvelaze metad maSin momwons, roca umweo da mouxerxebelia, maSin iseTi saTnoa.
me bevrad ufro msiamovnebs, roca is mixsnis rames, vidre roca me vaswavli. ra
Tqma unda, gacilebiT ukeTesi iqneboda, yvelafriT Cemze maRla rom idges.
rac unda is ifiqron Cvenma dedebma! oRond ki rame miTxras!
ana
oTxSabaTi, 29 marti, 1944
Zvirfaso kiwi!
guSin `oranes~ radiosadguriT ministri bolvenstaini laparakobda. omis
Semdeg am periodis dRiurebi da wignebi unda gamovceTo. yvela maSinve Cems
dRiurs eca. marTlac, ra saintereso iqneba, omis Semdeg rom gamovaqveyno

romani `TavSesafari~, Tumca saTaurs rom waikiTxaven, ifiqreben, deteqtiuri

romaniao.
ara, seriozulad. gana omis Semdeg, Tundac oci wlis Semdeg, adamianebi
daijereben im ambavs, Tu rogor vcxovrobdiT aq ebraelebi, ras vambobdiT, ras
vWamdiT. miuxedavad imisa, rom SenTvis bevri ram miambnia, es mainc Cveni
cxovrebis umniSvnelo nawilia. magram Sen ar ici, ra Zalian eSiniaT qalebs,
roca qalaqs bombaven, rogorc magaliTad kviras, roca inglisis 350-ma
TviTmfrinavma naxevari milioni kilogrami dinamiti daayara iumoidens, roca
afeTqebis talRa saxlebs azanzarebs, roca gesmis, rogori epidemiebi
mZvinvarebs qalaqSi. me mTeli dRe unda vwero, rom yoveli wvrilmani
Segatyobino. adamianebs bostneulisa da, saerTod, yvelafris sayidlad grZel
rigSi uxdebaT dgoma. eqimi avadmyofTan ver misula, radgan iparaven manqanebsa
(Tuki vinmes SerCa) da velosipedebs. yvelgan Zarcvasa da qurdobazea laparaki
da me Cems Tavs vekiTxebi: sad gaqra holandielTa saarako patiosneba. rvaTerTmeti wlis mozardebi amtvreven sxvisi binis fanjrebs da miaqvT yvelaferi,
rasac moixelTeben. veravin bedavs, Tundac xuTi wuTiT miatovos bina, radgan
sakmarisia, mcire xniT moscilde saxls da dabrunebuls aRaraferi dagxvdeba.
gazeTebSi yoveldRe beWdaven gancxadebebs, sadac patronebi gasamrjelos
pirdebian imaT, vinc daabrunebs moparul sabeWd manqanebs, sparsul xaliCebs,
eleqtrosaaTebs, sakabe da sapaltoe naWrebs da a. S. quCebSi did
eleqtrosaaTebs xsnian, jixurebidan telefonebi gaaqvT da mavTulsac ki ar
toveben.
cxadia, SeuZlebelia, mosaxleobis sulieri ganwyobileba kargi iyos.
sakvirao racioniT Sors ver waxval. mokavSireebis gadmosxdomas saSveli ar
daadga. mamakacebs germaniaSi ukres Tavi, bavSvebi SimSiloben, avaddebian.
yvelas cudad acvia da axuravs. fexsacmlis lanCa `Sav bazarze~ Svidnaxevari
guldeni Rirs. mewaReebi SekveTas ar Rebuloben, Tu miiRes, ori Tve unda
ucado, sanam SeakeTeben, amasobaSi SeiZleba dagekargos kidec.
Tumca, erTi mxriv, kargicaa: rac ufro cudia kveba, rac ufro mkacria
represiebi, miT ufro izrdeba sabotaJi okupantebis winaaRmdeg. sursaTsanovagis gamanawilebeli dawesebulebebis momsaxure personali xSirad
exmareba damalulebs, magram aris gamcemlobis SemTxvevebic da maSin yvelas
cixeSi amwyvdeven. sabednierod, mters mxolod niderlandelTa umniSvnelo
nawili uWers mxars.
ana
paraskevi, 31 marti, 1944
Zvirfaso kiwi!
jer kidev sakmaod civa, magram umravlesobas ager ukve erTi Tvea,
naxSiri ara aqvs. kargi saqmea, ara? ruseTis frontze gamarjvebam optimisturi
ganwyobileba gamoiwvia, saqme iq brwyinvaled midis!! Tumca politikur ambebze
cotas gwer, magram mainc unda gacnobo, sad arian axla rusebi: poloneTis
sazRvarze, rumineTTan pruTze gavidnen da oders miadgnen. yoveldRe elian
sagangebo oficialur cnobas. moskovSi saluti ise gaxSirda, albaT, mTeli
qalaqi gugunebs. ar vici, moswonT rusebs srola, rogorc frontis siaxlovis
mauwyebeli, Tu sxvagvarad ver gamouxatavT TavianTi sixaruli.
germaniis jarebma ungreTis okupacia moaxdines: ungreTSi milionamde
ebraeli cxovrobs, maT albaT mospoben.
CvenTan gansakuTrebuli araferi momxdara. dRes van daanis dabadebis
dRea. saCuqrad ori kolofi Tambaqo da mcireodeni yava (misma colma am
dRisTvis gadainaxa) miiRo. kralerma limonis punSi moutana, mipma sardinebi,
Cven odekoloni, iasamani da tulipi mivarTviT. aRarafers vambob Jolosa da
mocxaris murabian tortze, romelic uvargisi fqvilisa da karaqis gamo
ifSvneboda, magram mainc araCveulebrivad gemrieli iyo.
Cemze da peterze Woraobas ukles. Cven SesaniSnavi megobrebi gavxdiT,
xSirad varT erTad da qveynis ambebze vsaubrobT. ra kargia, rom Tavis Sekaveba

ar mixdeba, rogorc sxva biWebTan, roca saCoTiro Temaze Camovardeba saubari.

magaliTad, amas winaT sisxlis Semdgenilobaze vsaubrobdiT da menstruaciasac
SevexeT. misi azriT, Cven, qalebs bevris atana SegviZlia oh, oh, oh, viTomda
ratom?
Cemi cxovreba bevrad gaumjobesda, RmerTma ar damtova marto da arc
momavalSi damtovebs.
ana
SabaTi, 1 aprili, 1944
Zvirfaso kiwi!
da mainc metismetad miWirs. Sen xom ici, rasac vgulisxmob. menatreba
kocna. kocna, romelic amden xans ar meRirsa. nuTu igi mxolod ise miyurebs,
rogorc amxanags? nuTu misTvis ufro meti ara var. Senc kargad ici da mec,
rom Zlieri var, yvela gasaWirs gavuZleb da, saerTod, ar mCvevia, vinmes
Semweoba vTxovo. dedas arasodes CavbRauWebivar, magram axla siamovnebiT
davayrdnobdi peteris mxarze Tavs da gavisusebodi!
verasodes, verasodes ver daviviwyeb im sizmars, roca loyaze peteris
loya vigrZeni, roca yvelaferi momxiblavi da mSvenieri iyo. nuTu mas ar surs
igrZnos yovelive es? SeiZleba morcxvoba uSlis xels gamomitydes siyvarulSi?
maS ratom unda, rom mudam mis gverdiT viyo. ratom arafers meubneba? ara,
jobia, gavCumde, davmSvidde. Zlieri unda viyo, moTminebiT unda velodo da
yvelaferi amixdeba. magram... da swored esaa cudi: ise gamodis, TiTqos me
davdevde mas. is ki ar Camodis CemTan, mudam me avdivar zeviT. magram es xom
Cveni oTaxebis ganlagebazea damokidebuli da mas, albaT, esmis. o, mas kidev
ufro meti unda esmodes!
ana
orSabaTi, 3 aprili, 1944
Zvirfaso kiwi!
Tumca veridebi amaze laparaks, mainc minda dawvrilebiT mogwero, rogor
vikvebebiT, radgan Wama erT-erT uZneles problemad iqca ara marto
TavSesafarSi, aramed mTel niderlandebSi, evropaSi da, saerTod yvelgan.
21 Tvis manZilze, mas Semdeg rac aqa varT, kvebis rigi `periodebi~
gaviareT. `periodi~ moicavs im dros, roca yovelTvis erTi da igive kerZi da
erTi da igive bostneuli gvqonda. erTxans mxolod salaTas vWamdiT, xan
Saqarmoyrils, xanac uSaqrod. zogjer damatebiT gvaZlevdnen an kanianad
moxarSul, anda cecxlgamZle qvabSi Semwvar kartofils. amis Semdeg ispanaxis
jeri dadga. mas mohyva kolrabi, kitri, pamidori, kombostos mwnili da a. S. da
a. S. wlis drois mixedviT. aba, ra sasiamovnoa yoveldRe sadilad da vaxSmad
mJave kombosto, magram roca gSia, ras ar SeWam, yvelaze `ukeTesi~ periodi
axla dagvidga, radgan axali bostneuli aRar gvaqvs. Cveni yovelkvireuli meniu
aseTia: sadilad wiTeli lobio, cercvis naxarSi, kartofili comis gufTiT,
kartofilis piure, zogjer RvTis wyalobiT miwamxala an Sempali stafilo.
Semdeg ki isev wiTeli lobio. puris naklebobis gamo kartofils yovel ijraze
vWamT. sauzmes kartofiliT viwyebT. wvnians vxarSavT TeTri an wiTeli
lobiosagan kartofilisa da sayovelTaod cnobili koncentratebisagan:
Julienis, sadedoflo da wiTeli lobios wvniani. yvelaferSi wiTeli lobioa,
albaT, purSic. yovel saRamos wiTeli Warxlis salaTas vWamT da kartofils
SeTiTxnili sawebeliT. ramdenime sityva comis gundazec unda vTqva. gundas
`mTavrobis fqvilisa da safuarisagan~ vamzadebT. raRa Tqma unda, yvelafers
ewebeba, iweleba da kuWs qvasaviT awveba. araferia, amasac avitanT!
ici, ra iyo am kviris yvelaze didi movlena? gulRviZlis Zexvis naWeri
da povidloiani gamxmari puri. miuxedavad amisa, mainc cocxlebi varT da Cven
Raribul sakvebs xSirad gemrielad mivirTmevT.
ana

samSabaTi, 4 aprili, 1944

Zvirfaso kiwi!
am bolo dros aRar vici, risTvis vmuSaob. oms bolo ar uCans,
zRaprulad Sorsaa. Tu omi seqtembramde ar damTavrda, skolaSi aRar waval,
radgan ori wliT CamorCena ar minda. mTeli dReebi peterze vfiqrob, mxolod
peterze. is mudam CemTanaa, ZilSic, cxadSic, SabaTs ki vigrZeni, rom metis
atana aRar SemiZlia, rom saSinlad ubeduri var. jer peterTan vijeqi da
cremlebi maxrCobda, mere qalbaton van daanTan erTad limonis punSs vwrupavdi
da vxarxarebdi, agznebuli, aRelvebuli viyavi, magram rogorc ki marto davrCi,
vigrZeni, rom tiriliT guli unda vijero. Ramis perangis amara iatakze davemxe,
didxans vloculobdi gulmodgined, bolos TaviT xelebs daveyrdeni da
cariel iatakze muxlmoyrili, erTianad mokuntuli vtirodi.
gons isev Cemma saSinelma slukunma momiyvana. Cemi xma rom mezobel
oTaxSi ar gaegonaT, vcdilobdi, cremlebi Semekavebina. vamxnevebdi, vamSvidebdi
Cems Tavs, ganuwyvetliv vimeorebdi: `valdebuli var, valdebuli var,
valdebuli var...~
uxerxulad jdomam gamaSeSa da sawolis kideze daveci. gunebaamRvreuli
didxans vebrZodi sakuTar Tavs, xolo TerTmetis naxevarze loginSi Cavweqi.
yvelaferi gaqra! gaqra ukvalod... imisaTvis, rom ar gamovsulelde, ar CamovrCe,
Jurnalisti gavxde, unda vimuSao; Jurnalistoba ki Zalian minda. vici, rom wera
SemiZlia. ramdenime moTxroba kargi gamovida, Cveni TavSesafari humoristulad
aRvwere, Cems dRiurSic bevri ramaa saintereso, magram... mainc gamosarkvevia,
maqvs Tu ara talanti. Cemi saukeTeso zRaparia `evas sizmari~, xolo
yvelaferze ucnauri da gasaocari isaa, rom TviTonac ar vici, ram damawerina.
`gedis cxovrebaSic~ bevri kargi adgilia, magram mTlianad ar varga.
Cemi naweris saukeTeso da umkacresi kritikosi TviTon me var. vici, ra
aris kargad dawerili da ra ara. visac ar uweria, ver gaigebs, ra sasiamovnoa
wera. uwin imas vdardobdi, kargad ver vxatav-meTqi, magram axla usazRvrod
bednieri var, radgan wera mainc SemiZlia. da Tu sagazeTo werilebis da
wignebis dasawerad niWi ar meyofa, ra gaewyoba, CemTvis mainc davwer.
minda bevr rames mivaRwio. ver warmomidgenia, rogor SeiZleba ise
cxovreba, rogorc deda, qalbatoni van daani da sxva qalebi cxovroben,
romlebic Tavis saqmes akeTeben, magram amqveynad arafers datoveben da
ukvalod gaqrebian. me qmrisa da bavSvebis garda, kidev unda mqondes raRac
iseTi, rasac mTlianad mivecemi. me sikvdilis Semdegac msurs viarsebo, amitom
vemadlierebi RmerTs, romelmac momaniWa Zala ganmeviTarebina goneba da kalmis
meSveobiT gamomexata is, rac CemSi suldgmulobs.
roca vwer, yvelaferi TavisTavad irkveva, dardi mSordeba, mxneoba
memateba. magram CemTvis mainc mTavaria vicode, davwer Tu ara odesme raime
mniSvnelovans, SevZleb Tu ara, mwerali an Jurnalisti gavxde? vimedovneb, rom
SevZleb, mTeli guliT vimedovneb! roca vwer, yvelafris axsna SemiZlia, Cemi
azrebis, idealebis, fantaziis. karga xania `gedis cxovrebisaTvis~ xeli ar
mixlia. TiTqos kargad vici, ra unda moxdes Semdeg, magram roca kalams
mokideb xels, nawarmoebi arc ise iolad da swrafad miiwevs win. SeiZleba verc
davamTavro da xelnaweri saqaRalde kalaTSi an RumelSi aRmoCndes. amgvari
fiqrebi maincdamainc sasiamovno araa, magram Semdeg gadavwyvite: `ToTxmeti
wlis asakSi, roca TiTqmis araviTari gamocdileba ara gaqvs cxovrebaSi,
filosofiuri wignis dawera SeuZlebelia!~
ana
xuTSabaTi, 6 aprili, 1944
Zvirfaso kiwi!
Sen SemekiTxe, ra mainteresebs, ra mitacebs yvelaze metad da axla minda
gipasuxo. gafrTxileb, nu SeSindebi, uamravi ram.
upirveles yovlisa, wera, magram es ar SeiZleba Cveulebriv gatacebad
CaiTvalos.

amis Semdeg yvelaze metad samefo gvarebis genealogia mainteresebs.

cnobebi frang, germanel, espanel, inglisel, rus, norvegiel da holandiel
mefeebze Jurnal-gazeTebidan da wignebidan amovkrife da bevri ram ukve
sistematizebulia. didi xania damCemda, roca istoriuli an biografiuli
xasiaTis wigns vkiTxulob, mTel nawyvetebs viwer, ase, rom Cemi mesame gataceba
istoriaa. mamam bevri istoriuli nawarmoebi miyida. mouTmenlad veli im dRes,
roca Tavad SemeZleba sajaro biblioTekaSi wignebis gadaqeqva.
meoTxe berZnuli da romauli miTebiT gatacebaa da saTanado wignebic
bevri maqvs. garda amisa, gatacebuli var kinovarskvlavebisa da saojaxo
fotoebis SegrovebiT. Zalian miyvars wignebi da mainteresebs yvelaferi, rac
mwerlebs, poetebs, mxatvrebs da xelovnebis istorias exeba. SeiZleba
mogvianebiT musikamac gamitacos. garkveulad ar momwons algebra, geometria da
ariTmetika. sxva saskolo sagnebi mainteresebs, magram yvelaze metad istoria!
ana
samSabaTi, 11 aprili, 1944
Zvirfaso kiwi!
lamis Tavi gamiskdes. ar vici, riT daviwyo. paraskevs (vnebis paraskevs)
nasadilevs da SabaTs sxvadasxva gasarTobebiT viqcevdi Tavs. dReebi
uferulad, swrafad mihqrodnen. kviras eqvs saaTamde davrCiT maRla. Svidis
TxuTmeti wuTidan Svidamde radioTi mSvenier koncerts gadmoscemdnen
mocartis nawarmoebebidan, gansakuTrebiT momewona `patara Ramis serenada~. ar
SemiZlia musikis xeirianad mosmena sxvebis TandaswrebiT, radgan kargi musika
Zalian maRelvebs.
kvira saRamos me da peteri sxvenze avediT. moxerxebulad rom
vmsxdariyaviT, Cveni oTaxidan divnis baliSebi wamoviReT da yuTze
movkalaTdiT. siviwrovis gamo yuTebze zurgmiyrdnobilni erTmaneTs vekvrodiT.
meTvalyurec gvyavda, muSi Cvens sazogadoebaSi iyo. cxras rom TxuTmeti wuTi
aklda, batonma van daanma dagvistvina da gvkiTxa: baton duselis baliSi Tqven
xom ar wagiRiaTo. oriveni wamovxtiT, baliSebi avkrifeT, kata xelSi aviyvaneT
da baton van daanTan erTad qveviT CavediT. baliSis gamo mTeli ambavi
datrialda. batoni duseli saSinlad gabrazda, Cven Turme misi yurTbaliSi
wagviRia. eSinoda, Sig rwyilebi ar dabudebuliyvnen da raRac qeciani baliSis
gulisaTvis mTeli saxli Tavdayira daayena. me da peterma gadavwyviteT, Suri
gveZia da sawolSi ori magari jagrisi CavudeT. o, ramdeni vicineT am
intermecos gamo.
Cveni siamovneba didxans ar gagrZelebula. aTis naxevarze peterma
daakakuna, mamas sTxova, zemoT asuliyo da daxmareboda Zneli inglisuri
winadadebis TargmnaSi.
`raRac ambavia~, vuTxari me margos, `aSkarad tyuis!~
Cemi varaudi gamarTlda. Turme qurdebs sawyobis kari SemoumtvreviaT.
mama, peteri, van daani da duseli swrafad Cavidnen dabla. me, margo, deda da
qalbatoni van daani zemoT velodiT. oTx SeSinebul qals aba Cumad ra
gaaCerebs da Cvenc vlaparakobdiT, sanam qvemodan xmauri ar mogvesma. Semdeg
yvelaferi miwynarda. aTs rom TxuTmeti wuTi aklda, saaTma dareka. Cven feri
davkargeT, uxmod visxediT da Zalian gveSinoda. sad arian Cveni mamakacebi?
iqneb qurdebTan Cxuboben? 10 saaTze kibeze fexis xma mogvesma. Semovida
gafiTrebuli, aRelvebuli mama, ukan batoni van daani mohyveboda.
CaaqreT sinaTle da wynarad adiT zeviT. SeiZleba policia movides.
SiSis dro ar iyo. sinaTle Caaqres. me Jakets davavle xeli da yvelani
zeviT avediT.
ra moxda aseTi? gviTxari Cqara!
magram sadRa iyo mTqmeli. mamakacebi isev dabla Cavidnen. TerTmetis aT
wuTze oTxive zeviT amovida. ori peteris Ria fanjarasTan gaCerda sadarajod.
derefnis kari daketes, mbrunavi kari mixures, Ramis naTuras sviteri Semoaxvies
da Semdeg gviambes: `peterma ori Zlieri dartymis xma gaigona, qveviT Cairbina

da dainaxa, rom sawyobis kars marcxniv didi Tamasa aklia. Semdeg zeviT
amovida, Cveni ojaxis brZolisunariani wevrebi fexze daayena da oTxiveni
dabla Cavidnen. qurdebs swored maSin miuswres, roca iqaurobas Zarcvavdnen.
van daanma daufiqreblad iyvira: `policia~! mZarcvelebi SeSindnen da gaiqcnen.
policielebs rom xvreli ar SeemCniaT, mamakacebma momZvrali Tamasa Tavis
adgilze daamagres, magram garedan viRacam magrad daartya fexi da isev
moglija. aseTma Tavxedobam oTxives Tavzari dasca. batoni van daani da peteri
mzad iyvnen moeklaT aramzadebi. van daanma Ronivrad daartya culi iataks da
uecrad siCume Camovarda. kvlav ganizraxes momZvrali ficris miWedeba, magram
axla sxva dabrkolebam SeuSala xeli.
quCaSi mezoblad mcxovrebi col-qmari idga, jibis farnis Suqi mTel
sawyobs anaTebda.
`daswyevlos eSmakma~, CailuRluRa erT-erTma oTxTaganma da... uecrad
rolebi Seicvala policielebidan qurdebad iqcnen. Cveni kacebi Cumad
amovidnen zeviT. peterma swrafad gaaRo samzareulos da kabinetis kar-fanjara,
telefoni iatakze daanarcxa da bolos yvela SeniRbul kars ukan aRmoCnda.
aseTia pirveli nawilis dasasruli.
advili SesaZlebelia, col-qmarma policia gamoiZaxos. es ambavi kvira
saRamos, aRdgomis meore dRes moxda da kontoraSi aravin iyo. samSabaTamde
gaunZrevlad unda vmsxdariyaviT. warmoidgine, ra Znelia ori Rame da erTi dRe
SiSiT iyo Sepyrobili. araferze fiqris Tavi ar gvqonda, visxediT ukuneT
sibneleSi, radgan qalbatonma van daanma sinaTle Caaqro, vCurCulebdiT da
yovel gafaCunebaze vsisinebdiT: `su, su!~
gaxda TerTmetis naxevari, TerTmeti, Cami-Cumi ar ismis. mama da van daani
rigrigobiT Semodian CvenTan. uecrad, Tormetis naxevarze qveviT isev xmauri
atyda. TiToeuli Cveganis sunTqva ismoda, magram aravin ganZreula. nabijebi
saxlSi, kabinetSi, samzareuloSi, mere... Cvens kibeze! yvelas sunTqva Segvekra,
rva guls bagabugi gahqonda. nabijebi Cvens kibeze, mere viRac mbrunav karadas
ejajgureba. am wuTebis gadmocema SeuZlebelia.
`axla ki daviRupeT~, gavifiqre me da ukve warmovidgine, rogor mivyavarT
amaRamve gestapoSi. mbrunavi karada kidev orjer SeanjRries, Semdeg raRac
davarda Zirs da nabijebis xma TandaTan miwyda. jerjerobiT gadavrCiT. yvelas
kankali agvivarda. mesmoda viRacis kbilebis kawkawi, xmis amoRebas veravin
bedavda.
saxlSi xmauri aRar ismoda, magram moZravi karadis win sinaTle enTo,
imitom xom ar aanTes, rom karadam daaeWvaT? iqneb policielebs sinaTlis
Caqroba daaviwydaT? uecrad rom dabrundes vinme? yvelam ena amoidga. etyoba,
saxlSi aRaravinaa, magram xom SeiZleba Semosasvlel karTan modaraje
policieli idges.
SiSisagan akankalebulebs mogvinda... magram vedroebi sxvenze idga da
amitom peteris liTonis saqaRalde wavbilweT. pirveli van daani miadga, Semdeg
mama, dedas moerida da mamam WurWeli oTaxSi moutana. amiT me, margom da
qalbatonma van daanma siamovnebiT visargebleT, bolos dedamac. qaRaldze
moTxovnileba didi iyo, sabednierod, jibeSi medo ramdenime furceli.
WurWeli yarda, Cven vCurCulebdiT, saSinlad daviRaleT. Tormeti saaTi
gaxda.
daweqiT iatakze da daiZineT!
me da margos baliSebi da sabnebi mogvces. margo karadis maxloblad
dawva. me magidis fexebSua. iatakze naklebad yarda, magram qalbatonma van
daanma mainc moitana Cumad cotaodeni qlori. garda amisa, WurWels Zveli
Tavsaburi gadaafares.
saubari, CurCuli, myrali suni, SiSi, muclis yuyuni, waramara viRacas
uWirs, modi da daiZine! samis naxevarze ise daviRale, rom oTxis naxevramde
aRaraferi gamigia. gamomaRviZa qalbatonma van daanma, radgan Tavi fexebze
damado. `momeciT rame Casacmeli, mciva~, viTxove me da marTlac momces, magram
nu ikiTxav, ra. piJamaze gadavicvi Savi Salis Sarvali, wiTeli svitri, Savi

qvedatani, TeTri maRalyeliani da daxeuli mokle windebic Cavicvi. qalbatoni

van daani skamze Camojda. axla batoni van daani gaiWima iatakze da Tavi
fexebze damado. me aTas rameze vfiqrobdi da Tan ise vkankalebdi, rom van
daani ar davaZine. megona, policielebi dabrundebian da Cven iZulebuli
SeviqnebiT vaRiaroT, rom vimalebiT. Tu policielebi keTili holandielebi
aRmoCndebian, gadavrCebiT da Tu nacistebi movidnen, maSin fuliT unda
gamovisyidoT Tavi.
damale radiomimRebi, amoixvneSa qalbatonma van daanma.
sad waviRo, RumelSi Sevagdo?!. Tu Cven aRmogvaCenen, barem
radiomimRebic naxon, upasuxa qmarma.
cxadia, anes dRiursac ipovnian, Tqva mamam.
davwvaT dRiuri, Semoitana winadadeba yvelaze mSiSaram Cvens
Soris. es wuTi CemTvis aranakleb saSiSi iyo, vidre policielebis mier karadis
jajguri.
ara, dRiuri ara, Cemi dRiuri CemTan erTad daiRupeba!
madloba RmerTs, mamas araferi uTqvams.
azri ara aqvs im saubris gadmocemas, romelic Cems gonebas SemorCa. bevri
ram iTqva. vanugeSebdi SeSinebul qalbaton van daans. vlaparakobdiT gaqcevaze,
gestapoSi dakiTxvaze da imaze, rom meti mxneoba gvmarTebs.
Tavi ise unda gveWiros, rogorc jariskacebs, qalbatono van daan!
`orane~ mogviwodebs, mtkiced davicvaT dedofali, samSoblo, Tavisufleba,
simarTle da samarTlianoba, cxadia, Tuki yvelaferi es gvwams, yvelaze
saSineli mainc is iqneba, Tu Cvens mfarvelebs CaviTrevT am ubedurebaSi.
van daanma isev gaucvala cols adgili. mama Cems gverdiT dawva.
mamakacebi ganuwyvetliv eweodnen, drodadro Rrma oxvra ismoda, mere isev
mounda... viRacas da ase gauTaveblad. oTxi saaTi, xuTi, eqvsis naxevari. bolos
wamovdeqi da peterTan avedi. fanjarasTan Camomjdari ise axlos viyaviT
erTmaneTTan, rom erTmaneTis sxeulis caxcaxs vgrZnobdiT. xandaxan oriode
sityvas gavimetebdiT da daZabulad vugdebdiT yurs, ra xdeboda irgvliv.
mezobeli saxlis erT-erT fanjaras SuqsaniRbavi fardebi moxsnes.
Svid saaTze mamakacebma gadawyvites daerekaT koophoisisaTvis da
kontoraSi vinme gamoeZaxebinaT. maT Caiweres, Tu ra unda eTqva telefoniT.
safrTxe didi iyo, radgan Semosasvlel karTan gaCerebul darajs SeeZlo
gaegona telefonis zaris wkaruni, magram policiis dabruneba ufro did
safrTxes warmoadgenda, ai, ra unda gadaecaT koophoisisaTvis:
`kari Semomtvreulia. saxlSi policia iyo. mbrunav kars moadgnen, zemoT
ar amosulan.
mZarcvelebs etyoba xeli SeuSales. sawyobis kari Semomtvreulia,
mZarcvelebi baRSi gadaxtnen da gaiqcnen.
sadarbazo Semosasvleli daketilia. kraleri, albaT, meore kariT gavida.
sabeWdi manqanebi kabinetSi Sav karadaSia damaluli. scados henkis
gafrTxileba, gamoarTvas elis gasaRebi da movides kontoraSi im sababiT, rom
katas sakvebi unda misces~.
yvelaferi saukeTesod moewyo. koophoiss daurekes, sabeWdi manqanebi
(romlebic zeviT amovitaneT) Sav karadaSi Seinaxes. Cven ki magidis irgvliv
visxediT da henkis an policiis mosvlas velodiT.
peters CaeZina. me da van daani iatakze viweqiT. uecrad qvemodan mZime
nabijebis xma mogvesma. `henkia~, gavifiqre me da Cumad avdeqi.
`ara, ara, policiaa!~ momesma viRacis xma.
karze daakakunes. mipis stvena! qalbatonma van daanma amdeni veRar aitana
da mkvdariviT gafiTrebuli uRonod daesvena skamze. daZabuloba rom kidev erT
wuTs gagrZelebuliyo, guli wauvidoda.
henki da mipi Semovidnen. Cveni oTaxi saucxoo sanaxavi iyo, marto magida
rad Rirda. magidaze ido gadaSlili `filmi da Teatri~, momxibvleli
kinovarskvlavebis portretebi, gaTxupnuli murabiT da kuWis aSlilobis
sawinaaRmdego wamliT. iqve egdo murabis ori carieli qila, naxevari da mTeli

puri, sarke, savarcxeli, asanTi, ferfli, sigaretebi, Tambaqo, saferfle, qalis

triko, jibis naTura, tualetis qaRaldi da a. S. yvelaferi erTmaneTSi iyo
areuli.
cxadia, henks da mips sixaruliT da cremlebiT SevegebeT. henkma karze
momZvrali ficari miaWeda da imwamsve wavida. karis gatexa policiisaTvis unda
Seetyobinebina. mipma karis qveS Ramis darajis baraTi ipova, sadac ewera, rom
kari gatexili daxvda da policias Seatyobina. henks masTanac unda Seevlo.
naxevar saaTSi Tavi wesrigSi unda mogveyvana. jer ar minaxavs, am xnis
ganmavlobaSi rom ase gardaqmniliyo yvelaferi. me da margom iatakze dagebuli
logini avalageT, mere sapirfareSos mivaSureT, xel-piri davibaneT, kbilebi
gavixexeT, Tma davivarcxneT. oTaxi cota mivalag-movalageT da isev zeviT
avediT. magida moesufTavebinaT, Cven wyali movitaneT, yava da Cai avaduReT da
sauzme gavSaleT. mamam da peterma Ramis WurWeli gaitanes da cxeli wyliTa da
qloriT garecxes.
TerTmet saaTze henki ukve CvenTan iyo, sufras SemovusxediT da TandaTan
davmSviddiT. ai, ra gviambo henkma:
`Cveni darajis, slagteris colma miTxra (TviTon darajs eZina), rom mis
qmars Semovlis dros Semtvreuli kari aRmouCenia. gaqceula, policieli
mouyvania da masTan erTad mTeli saxli gauCxrekia. samSabaTs kralerTan
apirebs misvlas... unda acnobos, rac moxda. policiis ganyofilebaSi jer
araferi icodnen karis Semomtvrevis Sesaxeb, iqve Caiweres yvelaferi da isinic
samSabaTs apireben mosvlas~.
ukan gabrunebulma henkma SemTxveviT bostneulis movaWresTan Seiara da
uambo, rac moxda.
vici, vici, upasuxa man mSvidad, guSin saRamos colTan erTad
Tqvens saxls Cavuare da davinaxe, rom kari Semtvreulia. cols ar undoda
SeCerebuliyo, magram me jibis farniT gavanaTe iqauroba da qurdebma
mokurcxles. policiisaTvis aRar damiZaxia, radgan vici, rom ar
gesiamovnebodaT. cxadia, me araferi ar vici, magram zog rames mainc vxvdebi.
henkma madloba gadauxada da wamovida. albaT, mimxvdaria, rom Cven aq
vimalebiT, radgan kartofili yovelTvis sadilobisas moaqvs, etyoba, kargi
kacia!
henki wavida. Cven WurWeli gavrecxeT da pirvel saaTze yvelani
dasaZineblad davweqiT. sams rom TxuTmeti aklda, gamomeRviZa. batoni duseli
adgilze ar iyo. namZinarevi saxiT samzareuloSi Sevedi da sruliad SemTxveviT
peters wavawydi. davTqviT, qveviT SevxvedrodiT erTmaneTs. Tavi odnav wesrigSi
moviyvane da qveviT Cavedi.
`gabedav sxvenze asvlas?~, mkiTxa man. me uari ar miTqvams, baliSi aviRe
da zeviT avediT... SesaniSnavi amindi iyo, magram male sahaero gangaSi atyda.
Cven adgilidan ar davZrulvarT. peterma mxrebze xeli momxvia. mec movexvie da
oTx saaTamde mSvidad visxediT. oTxze margo movida da yavis dasalevad
wagviyvana.
SevWameT puri, davayoleT limonaTi da isev sicilisa da xumrobis
xasiaTze davdeqiT. saRamos peters madloba gadavuxade, radgan Cvens Soris
yvelaze mamaci aRmoCnda.
arasodes ar vyofilvarT aseT safrTxeSi rogorc am Rames. RmerTma
dagvifara. warmoidgineT, sinaTle enTo, Cveni karadis win policia idga da
mainc ver aRmogvaCines.
roca desantis gadmosxma da bombardireba daiwyeba, maSin yvela mxolod
sakuTar Tavze agebs pasuxs, magram jerjerobiT saqme exeba Cveni keTili
udanaSaulo mfarvelebis beds.
`gadavrCiT, kvlavac dagvifare RmerTo!~ Cven mxolod amas vTxovT
RmerTs!
am ambis Semdeg zogi ram Seicvala. batoni duseli saRamoobiT
saabazanoSi zis da ara kraleris kabinetSi. cxris naxevarze da aTis naxevarze
peteri mTel saxls aTvalierebs. axla Ramec aRar SeiZleba fanjrebis gaReba.

aTis naxevris Semdeg sapirfareSos Carecxva akrZalulia. am saRamos durgali

mova da sawyobis karebs gaamagrebs. yvela daobs: ki ara! aucilebelia
araviTar SemTxvevaSi! kralerma gvisayvedura, gaufrTxileblad moiqeciTo,
henkic ambobs, aseT dros dabla Casvlis ufleba ar gaqvTo. am ambavma kidev
erTxel Segvaxsena, rom Cven ltolvili, erT adgilze mijaWvuli ebraelebi
varT. rom Cven arafris ufleba ara gvaqvs, movaleoba ki aTasi. yvela grZnoba
unda daviokoT. mxneoba, vaJkacoba unda gamoviCinoT, udrtvinvelad SeveguoT
Cvens beds, unda vakeToT mxolod is, risi Zalac Segvwevs da RmerTis imedi
viqonioT. odesme xom gaTavdeba es saSineli omi, odesme Cven mxolod ebraelebi
ki ar viqnebiT, aramed adamianebic.
vin agvkida aseTi tvirTi! vin gamogvyo Cven, ebraelebi, sxva xalxebisagan!
vin gvyo iZulebuli mudam tanjvaSi vicxovroT! Cven RmerTma Segvqmna aseTebi
da RmerTi gvixsnis. da Tu Cven mTel am tanjvas gavuZlebT, isev ebraelebi
davrCebiT. iqneb, rodisme es ganwiruli xalxi yvelasaTvis sanimuSo Seiqnes. vin
icis, iqneb Cvenma sarwmunoebam yvela xalxs aswavlos sikeTe. tanjva marto
amisaTvisac ki Rirs. Cven ar SegviZlia viyoT mxolod holandielebi,
ingliselebi an romelime sxva eris warmomadgenlebi, amasTan erTad Cven
ebraelebic unda davrCeT da davrCebiT kidec.
iyaviT mxned! saWiroa SevignoT Cveni amocana da drtvinvas moveSvaT,
gamosavali yovelTvis moiZebneba. RmerTs arasodes miutovebia ebraelebi
gasaWirSi! maT yvela saukunes gauZles da cocxalni darCnen. yvela saukuneSi
itanjebodnen, yvela saukuneSi mxned eWiraT Tavi. sustni ecemian, magram
Zlierebi rCebian da ar iRupebian!!!
im Rames iseTi grZnoba mqonda, TiTqos unda movmkvdariyavi. velodi
policias da mzad viyavi, rogorc jariskaci brZolis velze. mindoda,
samSoblosaTvis Tavi gamewira, magram raki gadavrCiT, axla Cemi udidesi
survili isaa, rom omis Semdeg holandieli gavxde.
miyvars holandielebi, miyvars Cveni qveyana, misi ena da minda, aq vimuSao.
arafers ar moveridebi, sanam Cemsas ar mivaRwev, Tundac dedofalTan momixdes
werilis miwera.
rac dro gadis, sul ufro damoukidebeli vxdebi mSoblebisagan,
miuxedavad imisa, rom axalgazrda var, simxneve ar maklia da ufro swori
warmodgena maqvs samarTlianobaze, vidre dedaCems. vici, ra minda, maqvs mizani,
sakuTari azri, rwmena da siyvaruli. momeciT saSualeba, viyo iseTi, rogoric
var da bednierebisaTvis meti araferi minda. me vici, rom qali var, Sinaganad
Zlieri da mamaci.
Tu RmerTma cocxali damtova, gacilebiT mets gavakeTeb, vidre dedaCems
odesme gaukeTebia. me ar davrCebi SeumCneveli, me farTo asparezze gaval,
xalxisTvis viSromeb.
axla me vici, rom cxovrebaSi umTavresia simamace da sicocxlisadmi
trfiali.
ana
paraskevi, 14 aprili, 1944
Zvirfaso kiwi!
CvenTan jer kidev daZabuli mdgomareobaa. pimi Tavs Zlivs ikavebs.
qalbatoni van daani gaciebulia, loginSi wevs, imanWeba da Wirveulobs. misma
qmarma feri dakarga, radgan gamamxnevebeli sigaretebi ara aqvs. dusels myudro
kuTxe waarTves da gauTaveblad buzRunebs.
yvelaferi moiSala; sapirfareSodan wyali wveTavs, onkanis xraxni gacvda.
sabednierod, nacnobebis wyalobiT, erTsac da meoresac male SeakeTeben.
Tavad vici, rom zogjer zedmetad mgrZnobiare var, magram... zogjer
mizezic arsebobs amisaTvis. roca me da peteri erTmaneTs mikrulni,
xelgadaxveulni vsxedvarT xis magar yuTze, roca igi Cems kululebs eTamaSeba,
roca gareT Citebi WikWikeben, roca vxedav, rogor imoseba xeebi mwvaniT, roca

mze gareT mixmobs, xolo haeri laJvardovani da gamWvirvalea, o, maSin bevri

ram minda!
TavSesafarSi ki Cems irgvliv mxolod pirquSi da ukmayofilo
adamianebia. ismis oxvra, Civili, TiTqos uecrad Cveni mdgomareoba
mniSvnelovnad gauaresda. magram Tu vinme cudad grZnobs Tavs, amaSi TviTonvea
damnaSave. TavSesafarSi misabaZ magaliTs aravin iZleva, aq yvelam TviTon unda
mouaros sakuTar ganwyobilebas: `o, netav Cqara gaTavdebodes yvelaferi!~
mesmis yoveldRe.
me Cemi samuSao, imedi, siyvaruli da simamace mSvelis. yovelive amas
kmayofileba da bedniereba moaqvs CemTvis.
magram ici ra, kiwi! dRes cotas `vurev~ da ar vici, ratom. RmerTma uwyis,
ra davwere, araviTari kavSiri ar igrZnoba. zogjer arc is mjera, rom Cemi
najRabni odesme vinmes daainteresebs.
`ugunuri batis Wukis aRsareba~, ase daarqmeven mTel am sisuleles.
batonebi bolkenstaini da gerbrandi1 (1 holandiuri gamomcemlebis gvarebia.)
bevrs verafers ipovnian Cems dRiurSi.
ana
SabaTi, 15 aprili, 1944
Zvirfaso kiwi!
erT aurzaurs meore mohyva. netav, rodis moeReba bolo yovelive amas,
ekiTxeba sakuTar Tavs TiToeuli Cvengani. warmoidgine, ra moxda. peters
daaviwyda, gamoeZro urduli, romelsac yovel Rame Semosasvlel kars vadebT,
meore karis gasaRebi ki moSlilia. amitom kraleri da muSebi kontoraSi ver
Semovidnen. kralerma mezobeli Seawuxa, iqidan fanjara Semoamtvria da ase
Semovida saxlSi. Cveni keTilismyofeli gacofebulia, aseTi sisulele rogor
mogividaTo. unda giTxra, rom peters am bolo dros TavdaWerilobam umtyuna.
sadilad rom visxediT, dedam uTxra, mecodebio da peteri kinaRam atirda.
saerTod, yvelani varT damnaSave. Cveulebriv, mamakacebi yoveldRe ekiTxebodnen,
gamoaZro Tu ara urduli, magram amjerad yvelas daaviwyda. iqneb mere rogorme
vanugeSo, guliT minda davexmaro. axla mogiyvebi, kidev ra moxda am bolo
dros TavSesafarSi...
erTi kviris win mofi uecrad avad gaxda. sruliad miknavebuli iyo,
TrToda. mipis bevri ar ufiqria, kata TavsafarSi gaaxvia, CanTaSi Caisva da
veterinarul klinikaSi waiyvana. eqimma raRac wamali misca, etyoba, mofis
muceli stkioda. mas Semdeg mofi Zneli sanaxavia. dRe da Rame sadRac daeTreva,
albaT, Tavis SeyvarebulTan.
sxvenis fanjaras axla RamiT Ria toveben. me da peteri xSirad vsxedvarT
am fanjarasTan.
koophiosis da cotaodeni zeTis saRebavis daxmarebiT sapirfareSo kvlav
wesrigSi moviyvaneT. xraxngacveTili onkani axliT Secvales. am TveSi rva
sasursaTo baraTi SeviZineT. Cveni sasusnavi amjerad pikulia. Tu bedma
gvimtyuna, qilaSi mxolod ramdenime kitri aRmoCndeba mdogvis sawebliT.
bostneuli sruliad aRara gvaqvs, mxolod salaTa da salaTa. axla Cveni
sakvebi kartofilia surogatebisagan damzadebuli sawebliT.
qalaqs xangrZlivad da Tanac xSirad bombaven.
haagaSi yumbara ratuSas daeca da bevri dokumenti daiwva. holandielebma
axali pasporti unda miiRon. dReisTvis kmara!
ane
kvira dila, TerTmeti sruldeba,
16 aprili, 1944
Zvirfaso kiwi!
guSindeli dRe arasodes ar damaviwydeba, radgan Cems cxovrebaSi
yvelaze mniSvnelovani ram moxda, gana yvela qaliSvilisaTvis didi

mniSvneloba ara aqvs im dRes, roca pirvelad akoceben! hoda CemTvisac asea.
saTvalavSi ar miiReba is SemTxveva, roca bramma marjvena loyaze makoca da
arc mister uokeris xelze kocna. momismine, minda giambo, rogor makoces
pirvelad.
guSin saRamos, saaTis rvaze, me da peteri taxtze visxediT. uecrad
mxrebze xeli momxvia.
cota CaviwioT, vuTxari me, Torem yovelTvis TaviT yuTs
vejaxebi!
peterma Caiwia, ramdenic ki SeiZleboda, me mklavqveS xeli gavuyare da
mivekari. man kidev ufro magrad momxvia xeli. Cven adrec xSirad vmsxdarvarT
erTmaneTis gverdiT, magram ise axlos, rogorc am saRamos, arasodes. peterma
ise magrad mimikra mkerdze, rom guli amiCqrolda. rac dro gadioda, miT
ufro kargad vgrZnobdi Tavs. peteri sul ufro magrad mikravda gulSi da
bolos Cemi Tavi mis mxarze aRmoCnda, misi ki Cemsaze. xuTiode wuTis Semdeg
isev gavswordi, magram man swrafad momkida orive xeli Tavze da kvlav
mimizida. o, ra kargi, ra SesaniSnavi grZnoba mqonda, xmis amoReba ar SemeZlo,
mxolod am wuTebiT vtkbebodi. peterma rogorRac uxerxulad momisva xeli
loyaze, mklavze, eTamaSeboda Cems kululebs. erTmaneTs mikrulni adgilidan
ar viZrodiT.
kiwi, me ar SemiZlia agiwero is grZnoba, romelic dameufla.
araCveulebrivad bednieri viyavi, me mgoni iseTive grZnoba hqonda masac. cxris
naxevarze wamovdeqiT da peterma savarjiSo fexsacmeli Caicva. saxli unda
daeTvalierebina, da amitom sul Cumad unda evlo. me mis gverdiT videqi. Tavad
ar vici, rogor moxda. magram sanam qveviT CavidodiT, peterma loyaze makoca,
sadRac marcxena loyasa da yurs Soris. me ise Cavirbine kibe, rom ukan arc ki
momixedavs da... mouTmenlad veli dRevandel saRamos.
ana
orSabaTi, 17 aprili, 1944
Zvirfaso kiwi!
rogor fiqrob, moewoneba dedas da mamas, rom biWebTan erTad taxtze
vzivar da vikocnebiT, miT umetes, biWi ukve Cvidmeti wlisaa, me ki TxuTmetisac
ara var jer? Cemi azriT, dasaZraxi amaSi araferia, aq mxolod sakuTari Tavis
imediT unda viyo. me ise mSvidad, ise saimedod vgrZnob Tavs, roca mis
mklavebSi vocnebob, rom sunTqva mekvris. saSinlad vRelav, roca loyaze mis
loyas vgrZnob. ra kargia, roca ici, rom viRac gelodeba!
magram am ambavSi marTlac bevria `magram~. dajerdeba ki peteri yovelive
amas? marTalia, me ar damviwyebia misi dapireba, magram peteri mainc vaJia!
me kargad mesmis, rom yovelive es CemTvis naadrevia. TxuTmeti wlis
mxolod axla vxdebi da uecrad aseTi damokidebuleba. me TiTqmis
darwmunebuli var, rom margo arasodes ar akocninebda vaJs, sanam daniSvnaze an
qorwilze ar Camovardeboda laparaki. me da peters ki aseTi gegmebi ara gvaqvs.
me mgoni, arc dedas ar ukocnia aravisTvis, sanam mamas gahyveboda... ras
ityodnen Cemi megobari gogonebi, rom gaigon, rogor viweqi peteris mklavebSi,
rogor scemda Cemi guli mis mkerdze, rogor medo Tavi mis mxarze, mas ki
Cemsaze?
ah, ana rogor ar grcxvenia, magram marTali rom giTxra, sasircxvilos me
verafers vxedav amaSi. Cven aq Caketilebi varT, mowyvetilni mTel samyaros,
mudam SiSsa da avis molodinSi, gansakuTrebiT am bolo dros. ratomRa unda
gavurbodeT erTmaneTs, Tu erTmaneTi gviyvars? ratom unda vicadoT manamde,
sanam gavizrdebiT? ratom unda gvawuxebdes amdeni kiTxvebi?
me Tavad vikisre yvelaferi da me vageb pasuxs. igi arasodes ar momayenebs
tkivils, ar gamaubedurebs. da Tu asea, ratom ar unda moviqce ise, rogorc
guli mikarnaxebs, rom orive bednieri viyoT. miuxedavad amisa, Sen albaT amCnev,
kiwi, rogor vmeryeob. etyoba, Cemi Tandayolili patiosneba ver egueba aseT
kekemalulobas. rogor fiqrob, valdebuli var Tu ara, yvelaferi vuambo mamas?

rogor migaCnia, SeiZleba Cveni saidumloeba vandoT mesame pirs? maSin xom Cveni
nazi urTierToba gaqreba. gana aseTi gandoba sulierad ufro metad
damamSvidebs. unda movelaparako `mas~.
diax, bevri ram maqvs salaparako `masTan~, radgan marto alerss
araviTari azri ara aqvs. saWiroa meti ndoba, yvelafris gaziareba, xolo imis
Segneba, rom erTmaneTs vendobiT, kidev ufro Zliers gagvxdis!
ana
samSabaTi, 18 aprili, 1944
Zvirfaso kiwi!
yvelaferi rigzea. es wuTia, mamam gviTxra, rom oci maisisaTvis
mniSvnelovani operaciebia mosalodneli rogorc ruseTSi, aseve italiaSic da
dasavleTSic. rac ufro didxans vsxedvarT aq, miT ufro warmoudgenlad
mimaCnia Cveni ganTavisufleba. rogorc iqna, guSin me da peters Soris gaimarTa
saubari, romelsac ager aTi dRea ver movabiT Tavi. me mas Cveni, qaliSvilebis,
mTeli saidumloeba gavumxile da ar momridebia Sevxebodi yvelaze intimur
sakiTxebs. saRamo ormxrivi kocniT damTavrda, TiTqmis tuCebSi. es marTlac
SesaniSnavi grZnobaa.
iqneb rodisme avitano zeviT Cemi wignaki, romelSic Cawerili maqvs
yvelaferi, rac momwons da orive erTad ufro Rrmad CavwvdebiT brZnul
azrebs. me ar makmayofilebs marto xvevna. Zalian minda, isic CemsaviT
fiqrobdes.
zamTris cvalebadi amindebis Semdeg mSvenieri gazafxuli dadga. aprili
marTlac didebulia, arc Zalian cxela da arc Zalian civa, xandaxan wvima
cris. Cveni wabli TiTqmis sul gamwvanda, aqa-iq ukve gamoCnda patara
sanTlebi. SabaTs elim didad gagvaxara. mogvitana yvavilebi, nargizebis sami
kona da CemTvis SesaniSnavi cisferi hiacintebi.
naxvamdis, kiwi, algebras unda Cavujde.
ana
oTxSabaTi, 19 aprili, 1944
Zvirfaso megobaro!
(ase hqvia erT films dorit kreiseris, ida viustisa da harald
paulsenis monawileobiT).
ra SeiZleba iyos amaze uaresi, roca Ria fanjridan gascqeri bunebas,
gesmis Citebis galoba, grZnob loyaze mzis sxivebs da sayvarel ymawvilTan
xelgadaxveuli, mikruli, gasusuli dgaxar. ara mgonia, amgvari siaxlove cudi
iyos, radgan aseT dros siCume kargad moqmedebs Cemze. o, netav aravin
gviSlides xels, muSic ki ara!
ana
paraskevi, 21 aprili, 1944
Zvirfaso kiwi!
guSin dRis meore naxevarSi viweqi, yeli mtkioda. wola pirvel dResve
saSinlad mombezrda da, radgan sicxe mqonda, avdeqi. dRes mis udidebulesobas
iorkis taxtis memkvidres, mefis asuls elisabeds, 18 weli Seusrulda. bi-bi-sim
gadmosca, rom igi jer ar gamoecxadebinaT srulwlovanad, rogorc es saerTod
miRebulia samefo ojaxSi. Cven sul imis fiqrSi varT, Tu romel ufliswuls
gahyveba colad es mzeTunaxavi, magram Sesaferisi veravin aRmovuCineT. SeiZleba
misi da, mefis asuli margaret-roz, momavalSi belgiis ufliswuls boduens
gahyves colad.
CvenTan ki ubedurebas ubedureba mosdevs. es esaa, Semosasvleli kari
SevakeTeT, magram axla sawyobis muSa gamotyvra. rogorc Cans, kartofilis
fqvils iparavda da cdilobs yvelaferi elis gadaabralos. cxadia, mTeli
TavSesafari Relavs. eli sibrazisagan gaafTrebulia.

minda Cemi zRapari romelime Jurnals gavugzavno. iqneb dabeWdon. cxadia,

fsevdonimiT.
naxvamds, darling!1. (1 Zvirfaso (ingl.).)
ana
samSabaTi, 25 aprili, 1944
Zvirfaso kiwi!
aTi dRea, rac duseli van daans ar elaparakeba da mxolod imitom, rom
sawyobis karis gatexis Semdeg sifrTxilis mizniT rigi axali RonisZiebebi
gamoimuSaves, rac dusels xels ar aZlevs. igi gvarwmunebs, van daanma miyvirao.
`aq yvelaferi Cum-Cumad keTdeba~, miTxra man, `mamaSens unda
movelaparako~. dusels aukrZales SabaTs nasadilevs da kviraobiT qveviT
kontoraSi jdoma, magram mainc Cavida. van daani gacofda. mama duselTan
mosalaparakeblad wavida. cxadia, Tavis gasamarTleblad duseli raRacas miedmoedo, magram amjerad mamasTanac ki araferi gauvida. axla mamac aRar
elaparakeba, radgan duselma awyenina. Cven ar viciT, ra uTxra, albaT rame
Zalian cudi.
davwere SesaniSnavi moTxroba. davarqvi `bleri, samyaros aRmomCeni~. Cem
sam msmenels moTxroba Zalian moewona.
ise saSinlad var gaciebuli. surdo margos, mamas da dedasac gadavde,
peteri mainc gadaurCes! undoda ekocna CemTvis da `eldorado~ miwoda. ara,
Cemo kargo, araferi gamova! da mainc ra kargia!
ana
xuTSabaTi, 27 aprili, 1944
Zvirfaso kiwi!
qalbatoni van daani dilidanve cud gunebazea, xan gacivebas uCivis, xan
wveTebi ara maqvs, xan cxviris moxocva mombezrdao. dausruleblad wuwunebs:
mze ar anaTebs, jarebis gadmosxmas agvianeben, fanjaraSi gaxedva ar SeiZleba
da a. S. da a. S. misma Wirveulobam bevri gvacina da, radgan yvelaferi arc ise
cudadaa, isic agvyva.
vkiTxulob `karlos mexuTes~. wignis avtoria gioTingenis universitetis
profesori. 40 weli umuSavia am wignze. xuT dReSi mxolod 50 gverdi wavikiTxe.
metis wakiTxva SeuZlebelia. wigni 594- gverdiania da axla iangariSe, ramden
xans movundebi mis wakiTxvas. nu dagaviwydeba, meore nawilic aqvs... magram es
kia, rom Zalze sainteresoa!
moswavlis saqmianoba araferia imasTan SedarebiT, rasac me erT dReSi
vakeTeb. jer holandiuridan inglisurad vTargmne nawyveti nelsonis
ukanaskneli brZolidan, Semdeg Cavujeqi CrdiloeTis oms (17001721), axla
petre didi, karlos XII, avgust Zlevamosili, stanislav leCinski, mazepa,
brandenburgi, zemo pomerania, qvemo pomerania, dania saTanado
qronologiiTurT. amis Semdeg gadavedi braziliaSi, gavecani Tambaqos
plantaciebs, yavis Warb warmoebas, rio-de-Janeiros milionnaxevriani
mosaxleobiT, pernambukos da san-paulos, aRarafers vambob mdinare amazonze.
wavikiTxe zangebis, TeTrkanianebis, mulatebis, metisebis Sesaxeb, gavige, rom
mosaxleobs 50% wera-kiTxvis ucodinaria da am qveyanaSi malaria mZvinvarebs.
radgan cota dro kidev damrCa, Tvali gadavavle erTi samefo ojaxis
genealogias: daviwye ian ufrosiT, Semdeg mohyva vilhelm ludvigi, ernst
kazimiri, hainrix kazimir I-li da movedi patara margareT-franciskamde (daibada
1943 wels otavaSi).
12 saaTia: mecadineobas sxvenze ganvagrZob. pirvel saaTamde vswavlob
religiis istorias... brrr!
or saaTze sabralo bavSvi isev samuSaos Caujda (hm, hm). axla
viwrocxviriani da farTocxviriani maimunebis jeria. aba, kiwi, miTxari swrafad,
ramdeni TiTi aqvs hipopotams. maimunebis Semdeg vkiTxulob biblias: noes
kidobani, semi, qami, iafeti, mere isev karlos mexuTe. amis Semdeg peterTan

erTad inglisurs vswavlob: vkiTxulobT Tekereis `polkovniks~. peters

gamovkiTxe franguli vokabulebi da misisipisa da misuris SedarebiT
daxasiaTebaze vimsjeleT.
dReisaTvis kmara, adieu!1. (1 mSvidobiT (frang.).)
ana
paraskevi, 28 aprili, 1944.
Zvirfaso kiwi!
arasodes ar damaviwydeba sizmari peter veselze. sakmarisia, gavixseno da
isev vgrZnob misi loyis Sexebas, isev mipyrobs didebuli gancda. aseTi ram
aqaur peterTanac ganmicdia, magram iseTi siZlieriT arasodes, da ai... guSin
saRamos kvlav erTad visxediT taxtze xelgadaxveulebi. uecrad uwindeli ana
sadRac gaqra da misi daikava. meore anam, romelic arc mxiarulia da arc
didgula, mxolod siyvaruli da alersi unda.
vijeqi mis gverdiT, magrad vekvrodi da vgrZnobdi, rogor mevseboda
guli. Tvalze cremli momadga, saxeze Camomigorda da mis kurtaks daeca. ar
vici, SeamCnia man es Tu ara. ubralo moZraobiTac ki ar gaucia Tavisi Tavi.
netav isic Tu imas grZnobs, rasac me? sityva ar dauZravs. icis Tu ara, rom
gverdiT ori ane uzis. ramdeni kiTxvebia, pasuxi ki ar Cans!
cxris naxevarze wamovdeqi da mivedi fanjarasTan, sadac Cveulebriv
vemSvidobebiT erTmaneTs. me jer kidev vcaxcaxebdi, jer kidev meore ane viyavi,
peteri momiaxlovda. me kiserze xelebi movxvie da marcxena loyaze vakoce,
xolo roca marjvenaze vapirebdi kocnas, Cemi tuCebi mis tuCebs Sexvda.
mivewebeT erTmaneTs tuCebiT, kidev erTxel, kidev erTxel, dausruleblad!
rogor sWirdeba peters alersi! is mxolod axla mixvda, ra aris
qaliSvili, mxolod axla dainaxa rom am `qajebsac~ aqvT guli da roca maTTan
marto xar, sul sxvanairni arian. cxovrebaSi man pirvelad gaimeta megobris
grZnoba, sakuTari Tavi. aqamde mas arc vaJi hyolia megobari da arc qali. axla
Cven erTmaneTi vipoveT. arc me vicnobdi mas. mec ar myolia Seyvarebuli, axla
ki myavs.
mawuxebs erTi kiTxva! gana kargia, rom ase mivende, rom iseve savse var
vnebiT da ndomiT, rogorc peteri? me qali var da aseTi TavSeukavebloba ar
Semferis. am kiTxvaze mxolod erTi pasuxi arsebobs: `me didxans mRrRnida
sevda, didxans viyavi marto da uecrad nugeSi da sixaruli vipove!~ diliT
iseTebi varT, rogorc yovelTvis, dRisiTac, magram saRamos verafriT
dagviokebia erTmaneTisaken ltolva. ar SeiZleba ar ifiqro im netarebasa da
bednierebaze, romelic yovel Sexvedras moaqvs. saRamos mxolod erTmaneTs
vekuTvniT. yovel saRamos, gamosaTxovari kocnis Semdeg, minda gaviqce, aRar
vuyuro TvalebSi, gaviqce Sors, Sors, sruliad marto davrCe bnelSi!
magram sakmarisia, 14 safexuriT dabla Camovide da sul sxva garemoa:
gakaSkaSebuli oTaxi, sadac laparakoben, icinian, raRacas mekiTxebian da me ise
unda vupasuxo, rom verafers mixvdnen. guli jer kidev savse maqvs da ar
SemiZlia erTbaSad daviviwyo is gancda, romelic guSin saRamos dameufla.
nazi, damyoli ane iSviaTi movlenaa, magram miT ufro Znelia misi gareT
gagdeba. peteri ise Rrmad SemoiWra CemSi, rogorc aqamde aravin, mxolod
sizmarSi ganvicade erTxel aseTi ram. peterma mTlianad damipyro da Cemi suli
erTianad aaforiaqa. cxadia, amgvari gancdebis Semdeg adamiani unda damSviddes
raTa Sinagani wonasworoba aRadginos. o, peter, ra miyavi? ra ginda Cemgan? ra
iqneba Semdeg? o, axla ki mesmis elis eWvebi, mesmis, radgan Tavad ganvicdi
yvelafers. ufro didi rom viyo da peters Cemi SerTva undodes, netav ras
vetyodi? ane aRiare patiosnad! Sen mas colad ar gayvebodi, magram verc
advilad moSordebodi! peteris xasiaTi jer Camouyalibebelia, aklia energia,
vaJkacoba, Zala, is jer bavSvia da gonebiTac ar dgas Cemze maRla. yvelaferze
metad simSvidisa da bednierebisaken iswrafvis.
nuTu me mxolod ToTxmeti wlisa var? nuTu jer kidev suleli bavSvi
var, moswavle? nuTu sruliad gamoucdeli var yvelaferSi. magram me mainc meti

gamocdileba maqvs, vidre sxvebs, radgan me iseTi ram ganvicade, rac TiTqmis
aravis ganucdia Cems asakSi. meSinia sakuTari Tavis. meSinia, rom male avyvebi
vnebas da Tu es moxda, rogorRa moviqce momavalSi sxva ymawvilebTan? ra
Znelia yovelive es, guli da goneba mudam erTmaneTs ebrZvis. yvelafers Tavisi
dro aqvs, magram var ki darwmunebuli imaSi, rom swored SevarCie dro?
ana
samSabaTi, 2 maisi, 1944
Zvirfaso kiwi!
SabaT saRamos peters vkiTxe, rogor fiqrobs, xom ar unda vuambo
yvelaferi mamas. peteri odnav SeiSmuSna, magram mainc miTxra, saWiroao. me
gamexarda. es misi Sinagani siwmindis kidev erTi damamtkicebeli sabuTia.
rogorc ki qveviT Cavedi, mamas wylis mosatanad wavyevi da kibeze vuTxari:
mama, Sen cxadia, xvdebi, roca me da peteri erTad varT, erTi metris
daSorebiT ar vsxedvarT erTmaneTisagan. rogor ggonia, es cudia?
mamam maSinve ar mipasuxa, mere ki Tqva:
ara, ana, es cudi araa, magram am viwro sivrceSi frTxilad unda iyo...
man kidev Tqva raRac amdagvari, magram amasobaSi zeviT avediT. kvira
diliT Tavad damiZaxa da miTxra:
ane, me kidev erTxel Cavufiqrdi yovelive amas (me SiSma Semipyro),
da mivedi im daskvnamde, rom aq TavSesafarSi, es ar ivargebs! me megona, Sen
da peteri mxolod amxanagebi iyaviT. peters uyvarxar?
arc ufiqria amaze, vupasuxe me.
ai, ra, ana, Sen ici, rom me Zalian kargad mesmis Tqveni, magram mainc
TavSekaveba gmarTebs, zedmetad nu gaaTamameb. nu adixar ase xSirad zeviT.
amgvar ambebSi kaci ufro aqtiuria, qals meti TavSekavebis unari aqvs. gareT
sul sxvagvari viTarebaa, Tavisuflad cxovrob, sxva ymawvilebsa da gogonebs
xvdebi, SegiZlia sadme waxvide, gitacebs sporti da vin moTvlis, kidev ra.
magram Tu Tqven aq xSirad iqnebiT erTad, Semdeg ki guli agicruvdeba, maSin
yvelaferi bevrad ufro garTuldeba. Tqven xom isedac yoveldRe xedavT
erTmaneTs, frTxilad iyavi, ana, nu miitan am ambavs gulTan axlos.
me arc mimaqvs, mama. garda amisa, peteri Zalze wesieri da kargi
ymawvilia.
marTalia, magram susti nebisyofisaa da advilad eqceva rogorc kargi,
aseve cudi gavlenis qveS. imedi maqvs, rom bolomde kargi darCeba, radgan
ZiriTadad mainc wesieri adamiania.
Cven kidev bevri vilaparakeT da SevTanxmdiT, rom mama petersac
moelaparakeboda. kviras nasadilevs zeviT viyavi da peterma mkiTxa:
elaparake mamas, ana?
velaparake da Senc gadmogcem yvelafers, vupasuxe me. am ambavSi igi
cuds arafers xedavs, magram misi azriT, aq, am siviwroveSi SeiZleba advilad,
waveCxuboT erTmaneTs.
ki magram, Cven xom SevTanxmdiT, ar viCxuboT. me mtkiced maqvs
gadawyvetili, rom asec iqneba.
mec, peter, magram mama fiqrobs, rom aq yvelaferi sxvanairadaa, rom
Cven mxolod amxanagebi varT. Seni azriT, Cven ukve aRar SegviZlia viyoT
amxanagebi?
me mgoni SegviZlia, Sen rogor fiqrob?
mec ase mgonia. mamas vuTxari, rom Sen savsebiT gendobi. marTlac
gendobi, peter, gendobi mTlianad, iseve, rogorc mamas. me mimaCnia, rom Sen
ndobis Rirsi xar, xom asea?
imedi maqvs (igi gawiTlda da daibna).
me mjera Seni, mjera, rom kargi xar da cxovrebaSi bevrs miaRwev.
Cven kidev bevr sakiTxs SevexeT da bolos me vTqvi:
roca aqedan gavalT, albaT, CemTvis aRar Seiwuxeb Tavs.

igi aenTo: ara, ane, ara, marTals ar ambob! aseTi ram arasodes ar unda
ifiqro Cemze!
am dros damiZaxes...
orSabaTs peterma miTxra, rom mama masac elaparaka.
mamaSens miaCnia, rom amxanaguri grZnoba SeiZleba siyvarulSi
gadaizardos, magram me vuTxari, rom Tavisuflad SeuZlia gvendos.
axla mama Txoulobs, rom vuklo zeviT siaruls, magram me ase ar minda,
marto imitom ki ara, rom peterTan yofna msiamovnebs, aramed, imis gamoc, rom
mamas vuTxari, peters yvelaferSi vendobi-meTqi. diax, me mas vendobi da minda
es davumtkico kidec. rogorRa davumtkiceb, Tu undoblobis gamo qveviT
vijdebi.
ara, mainc vivli zeviT!
amasobaSi duselis dramac damTavrda. SabaTs saRamos sufraze man
holandiur enaze winaswar momzadebuli, mSvenieri sabodiSo sityva warmoTqva.
van daans maSinve moubrunda guli. etyoba duseli mTeli dRe swavlobda am
`gakveTils~. kviras misi dabadebis dRe iyo da mSvidad Caiara. Cven vaCuqeT 1919
wels Camosxmuli erTi boTli Rvino, van daanebma (axla maT ukve SeeZloT rame
mierTmiaT misTvis) erTi qila pikuli da samarTebeli, kralerma moutana
limonis jemi, mipma wigni, elim qoTniani yvavili. is ki yvelas TiTo
kvercxiT gagvimaspinZlda.
ana
oTxSabaTi, 3 maisi, 1944
Zvirfaso kiwi!
jer is axali ambebi, rac am kviraSi moxda. politikur sferoSi
ardadegebia, araferia axali, sruliad araferi, magram axla ki mjera, rom
jarebs gadmosxamen. yvelaferi rusebs xom ar unda gaakeTebinon. Tumca axla
imaTTanac araferi xdeba.
batoni koophoisi ukve yoveldRe dadis kontoraSi. peters taxtisaTvis
axali zambarebi uSova da amitom peterma avejis gadamkvrelis roli unda
ikisros, rac maincdamainc ar exaliseba. koophoisma mogvitana rwyilebis
mosaspobi fxvnilic. ho, marTla, SenTvis ar miambnia, rom mofi dagvekarga?
xuTSabaTs aqeT ukvalod gaqra, albaT didi xania katebis samoTxeSia da
romelime `cxovelTa megobarma~ gemrielad Sesansla. an iqneb misi tyavisagan
bavSvis qudi Sekeres. peteri Zalze damwuxrebulia.
SabaTs aqeT meored Tormetis naxevarze vsauzmobT. diliT erTi jami
fafis meti araferi gvaqvs. ase rom, erTi ijra mogvaklda. bostneuli Zneli
saSovaria. dRes gvqonda kolrabi, romelic cota Sempala. kolrabi, ispanaxi da
salaTa, sxva araferi gagvaCnia. amas daumate uvargisi kartofili SesaniSnavi
Sexamebaa ara?!
or Tveze metia, `avad~ ar vyofilvar. SabaTs isev damewyo. Tumca es
usiamo da uxerxulia, magram me mainc mixaria, rom yvelaferi ise mimdinareobs,
rogorc saWiroa.
Sen ar gagiWirdeba imis gageba, rom CvenTan xSirad gaismis
sasowarkveTilTa RaRadi: `ratom aris, ra saWiroa saerTod omi? ratom ar
SeuZliaT adamianebs mSvidad cxovreba? vis sWirdeba? vis sWirdeba es saSineli
gapartaxeba?~ TavisTavad kiTxvebi gasagebia, magram amomwuravi pasuxi aqamde
jer aravis miuRia. marTlac, ratom uSveben ingliselebi uzarmazar
TviTmfrinavebs, ratom akeTeben mZime yumbarebs da amave dros asawyob saxlebs
dangreulTa aRsadgenad? ratom xarjaven yoveldRiurad milionebs omis
saWiroebisaTvis, xolo medicinis, xelovnebisa da RaribebisaTvis erTi centic
ar emetebaT? ratom unda SimSilobdnen erTgan, roca sxvagan sursaTi lpeba?
ratom aris adamiani aseTi suleli?
ar mjera is ambavi, TiTqos omi mxolod xelmZRvaneli moRvaweebis,
mTavrobebisa da kapitalistebis bralia. ara, albaT, patara adamianebic arian

damnaSaveni, Torem mTeli xalxebi ar miiRebdnen omSi monawileobas, adamianSi,

albaT, imTaviTve gamjdaria miswrafeba ngrevis, mkvlelobis, Cexvisa da
mxecobisaken. sanam mTeli kacobrioba ar gardaiqmneba, arc omebi moispoba.
yvelaferi, rac aSenda, Seiqmna, gaizarda, yvelaferi gaiTeleba, moispoba da
kacobriobas yvelafris Tavidan dawyeba mouxdeba.
Tumca xSirad vyofilvar dadardianebuli, magram suliT ar davcemulvar.
Cven TavSefarebas ise vuyurebT, rogorc saxifaTo Tavgadasavals
romantikulsa da sainteresos. me erTxel da samudamod gadavwyvite, rom
sxvagvarad vicxovreb, vidre saerTod gogonebi cxovroben da ar SevizRudav
Tavs diasaxlisis uferuli cxovrebiT. axlandeli cxovreba kargi dasawyisia
da masSi bevri ramaa saintereso, yvelaze saxifaTo wuTebSic ki vamCnev
sasacilo mxareebs da uneblied mecineba.
me axalgazrda var da, albaT, maqvs gamouaSkaravebeli Tvisebebi. me
axalgazrda da Zlieri var. Segnebulad aRviqvam am uCveulo Tavgadasavals. ra
saWiroa mTeli dRe wuwuni? RmerTs bevri ram moucia CemTvis: laRi xasiaTi,
sicocxlisadmi trfiali, Zala. vgrZnob, rom yoveldRiurad vizrdebi
sulierad, vgrZnob, rom Tavisufleba axloa, vxedav, ra lamazia buneba, ra
kargi xalxi maxvevia irgvliv. ratom unda viyo imeddakarguli?
ana
paraskevi, 5 maisi, 1944
Zvirfaso kiwi!
mama ukmayofiloa, egona, Cveni saubris Semdeg yovel saRamos zeviT aRar
vivlidi. `xvevna-kocna~ ar gamagonoTo. ver vitan am sityvas! sakmarisia isic,
rom, saerTod, am sakiTxze visaubreT. magram ara, aucileblad unda wabilwon
yvelaferi. dResve movelaparakebi mamas. margom kargi rCeva momca. momismine, ai,
ris Tqmas vapireb:
mama, me mgoni axsna-ganmartebas eli da minda gulaxdilad gamovTqva
Cemi azri. etyoba, imedi gagicruvda, Sen xom Cemgan met TavSekavebas moelodi.
albaT, ginda, iseTive viyo, rogoric sxva ToTxmeti wlis gogonebi arian, an
unda iyvnen. magram cdebi!
mas Semdeg, rac aq varT, 1942 wlis ivlisidan ukanasknel dromde Zalian
miWirda. rom icode, ra xSirad vtirodi saRamoobiT, ra marto, ra ubeduri
viyavi, maSin gaigebdi, ratom mimiwevs guli maRla. erT dReSi ar xerxdeba imis
gakeTeba, rasac me mivaRwie, erTbaSad ver daiwyeb dedis an sxva adamianis
dauxmareblad cxovrebas. Cemi axlandeli damoukidebloba Zvirad damijda
bevri brZola da cremli dasWirda. SegiZlia damcino, ar damijero, magram amiT
araferi Seicvleba. me iseTi adamiani var, romelsac TviTon SeuZlia sakuTari
Tavis dacva, xolo Tqvens winaSe araviTar pasuxismgeblobas ar vgrZnob. me
mxolod imitom vambob amas, rom ar ifiqro, TiTqos raRac minda dagimalo.
yovel Cems nabijze me TviTon vageb pasuxs.
roca ukiduresad miWirda, Tqven yvelam, maT Soris Senc, Tvalebi
daxuWeT da arafris danaxva ar gindodaT. Sen me ar damxmarebixar, piriqiT,
yovelTvis marigebdi, uxeSad nu iqcevio. diax, Zalze uxeSad viqceodi, radgan
ar mindoda, Cemi ubedureba megrZno. wlinaxevris manZilze yoveldRiurad
komedias vTamaSobdi, ar vwuwunebdi. nakisri rolisTvis ar miRalatia. da vZlie
yvelafers. axla me suliTac da sxeuliTac damoukidebeli var. aRar mWirdeba
deda. brZolam gamakaJa.
da axla, roca sawadels mivaRwie, roca Cemi gavitane, me minda, Cemi gziT
viaro, im gziT, romelic sworad mimaCnia. ufleba ara gaqvs, ar unda meqceode
rogorc ToTxmeti wlis gogonas. mZime gansacdelma xani Semmata. Cemi saqcieli
arasodes gamixdeba sananeblad da ise moviqcevi, rogorc ufro sworad mimaCnia.
Sen ver damakaveb Seni Semwynarebluri gulkeTilobiT. an yvelaferi
amikrZale, anda mende yvelaferSi, oRond momeSvi!~
ana

SabaTi, 6 maisi, 1944

Zvirfaso kiwi!
guSin, sanam vaxSmad davsxdebodiT, mamas jibeSi werili Cavude, romelSic
yvelaferi ewera, rac guSin gagande. margom miTxra werilis wakiTxvis Semdeg
mama mTeli saRamo ugunebod iyoo (me zeviT WurWels vrecxavdi). sabralo pimi,
unda gameTvaliswinebina, ra Sedegs gamoiRebda es epistole! mama Zalze
mgrZnobiarea! me maSinve gavafrTxile peteri, rom aRaraferi hkiTxos, pimsac
CemTvis araferi uTqvams. sainteresoa, metyvis rames Tu ara?
TavSesafarSi yvelaferi Cveulebrivad mimdinareobs. Zneli
dasajerebelia, rasac fasebze da gareT darCenil adamianebze gviamboben.
naxevari girvanqa Cai 350 guldeni Rirs, erTi girvanqa yava 80 guldeni,
girvanqa karaqi 35, kvercxi 1 guldeni da 45 centi. 100 gram bulgarul
TambaqoSi 14 guldens ixdian, visac xeli miuwvdeba, yvela spekulantobs, yvela
raRaciT vaWrobs. Cvenma mepurem erTi koWi sakemsi Zafi 90 centad gviSova,
merZeves moaqvs sasursaTo baraTebi, mekuboe yveliT vaWrobs. yoveldRe gvesmis,
viRac gaZarcves, mokles, gaqurdes, da amas profesionali qurdebisa da
avazakebis garda, zogjer policielebic da darajebic sCadian. yvela cdilobs,
riTime gaivsos kuWi da, radgan xelfasis momateba akrZalulia, xalxi
yovelgvar TaRliTobas mimarTavs.
policia Tavs ver arTmevs arasrulwlovanTa saqmeebs. yoveldRe ukvalod
ikargebian TxuTmeti, Teqvsmeti, Cvidmeti wlis qaliSvilebi, zogjer ki ufro
didebic.
naxvamdis! (kacma rom Tqvas, aseTi gamoTxoveba swori araa. inglisis
radio mudam ase amTavrebs programas: Semdeg gadmocemamde, me ki unda vTqva:
Semdeg werilamde!)
ana
kvira, 7 maisi, 1944
Zvirfaso kiwi!
guSin mama didxans melaparaka. me saSinlad vRrialebdi, isic tiroda da
ici, ra miTxra?
`Cems cxovrebaSi bevri werili mimiRia, magram amisTana saZageli
arasodes. Sen, ana, Sen, romelic ase uyvarxar Sens mSoblebs, yovelTvis mzad
arian daxmareba gagiwion, mudam gicavdnen, Sen ambob, rom araviTar
pasuxismgeblobas ar grZnob Cvens winaSe da mitovebuli, martoxela xar? ara,
ana, Sens mxriv es didi usamarTlobaa. iqneb ase ar fiqrobdi, magram werilSi
ase weria. Cven amgvari sayveduri ar dagvimsaxurebia, ana!~
saSinlad Sevcdi, me mgoni, amaze cudi araferi Camidenia cxovrebaSi. Cemi
moTqma da cremlebi moCvenebiTi iyo, radgan mindoda mamasTvis Tavi
Semebralebina. marTalia, me bevri mwuxareba gadavitane, magram pimis
dadanaSauleba, romelmac amdeni ram gaakeTa CemTvis da axlac akeTebs,
aramzadoba da aramzadobaze metia. kargi qnes, rom miuwvdomeli simaRlidan
Camomagdes, Cems siamayes sila gaawnes. kargi qnes, radgan me adre Semeqmna didi
warmodgena Cems Tavze, xolo yvelaferi is, rasac froilain ana akeTebs,
sruliadac araa srulyofili. Tuki SegiZlia tkivili miayeno iseT adamians,
romelzedac yovelTvis amboben, miyvarso, da isic Segnebulad, es imas niSnavs,
rom sulmdabali, uaRresad sulmdabali xar! sircxviliT kinaRam movkvdi, roca
mamam sulgrZelad mapatia Cemi danaSauli da miTxra: werils RumelSi
Sevagdebo. ise alersianad, ise moridebiT meqceoda, TiTqos TviTon iyo
raRacaSi damnaSave. diax, ana, Sen jer kidev bevri ram unda iswavlo da jobia,
amiT daiwyo, vidre sxvebs zevidan dahyurebde an adanaSaulebde!
me bevri gaWirveba minaxavs, da gana yvela Cemi xnis bavSvsac igive ar
ganucdia. me xSirad vfarisevlobdi, magram es Seugneblad momdioda. cxadia,
martoobas yovelTvis vgrZnobdi, magram sasowarkveTilebamde arasodes
mivsulvar. unda mrcxvenodes da marTlac Zalian mrcxvenia!

rac moxda, moxda. amieridan mainc unda vecado, rom aseTi ram aRar
ganmeordes. daviwyeb cxovrebas Tavidan, albaT, ufro gamiadvildeba, radgan
peteri myavs. misi mxardaWeriT yvelafers SevZleb! axla marto aRar var. me mas
vuyvarvar, mec miyvars. maqvs wignebi, istoriuli naSromebi, dRiuri, gonji ara
var, arc suleli, vetrfi cxovrebas da minda kargi adamiani viyo.
diax, ane, Sen adreve icodi, rom Seni werili sastiki da usamarTloa,
magram mainc amayobdi amiT. dReidan ki isev mamis kvals unda gahyve da
aucileblad gamosworde.
ana
orSabaTi, 8 maisi, 1944
Zvirfaso kiwi!
miambnia rodisme SenTvis Cveni ojaxis istoria? me mgonia, ara. ase rom,
mismine. mamaCems Zalian mdidari mSoblebi hyavda. babuaCemma TviTon gaikafa gza,
bebiaCemi ki mdidari da warCinebuli ojaxidan iyo. axalgazrdobaSi mamac ise
cxovrobda, rogorc yvela mdidris Svili. yovel kviras mejlisebi, stumrebi,
dResaswaulebi, lamazi qalebi, nadimebi, wveulebebi... magram inflaciis dros,
romelic pirvel imperialistur oms mohyva, mTeli qoneba dakarges. mamam
brwyinvale aRzrda da ganaTleba miiRo da guSin bevri icina: 55 wlis manZilze
pirvelad amofxika qvabidan narCenebi.
dedac mdidari ojaxidanaa. Cven pirdaRebulni vusmenT, roca gviyveba
qorwilebze, sadac 250 kacisaTvis sufra iSleboda, mejlisebze, nadimebze. axla
Cvenze ar iTqmis mdidrebi ariano, magram imedebs omis Semdgom droze vamyarebT.
merwmune, me sruliad ar mainteresebs iseTi uferuli cxovreba, romelzedac
deda da margo ocneboben. siamovnebiT wavidodi erTi wliT parizSi, erTi wliT
londonSi, viswavlidi enebs, xelovnebis istorias. aba, miTxari, ra mosatania
amasTan margos survili, palestinaSi wavides da mowyalebis da gaxdes. me mudam
vocnebob lamaz kabebze, saintereso adamianebze. minda bevri ram vnaxo, bevri
ganvicado. me Sen yovelTvis geubnebodi amas. garda amisa, arc isaa cudi,
yvelaferTan erTad cota fulic Tu geqneba.
mipi qorwilSi iyo dapatiJebuli da am diliT yvelaferi mogviyva.
axaldaqorwinebulebi mdidari ojaxidan yofilan da qorwilic mdidruli
gadauxdiaT. Cven Suri aRgveZra, roca mipma gviambo, rogor gaumaspinZldnen:
bostneulisa da xorcis wvniani, Semwvari, puri da yveli, kvercxiT Sekmazuli
salaTa, rostbifi, namcxvari, Rvino, sigaretebi da amave dros yvelaferi
blomad (cxadia, sanovage spekulantebis daxmarebiT iSoves). mipma aTi Wiqa
Rvino dalia. erTi damixedeT am alkoholis mowinaaRmdeges. xolo Tu mipma
amdeni dalia, raRa iTqmis mis qmarze. albaT, blomad ylapa. cxadia, bevri
imxiarules. qorwilSi dapatiJebuli hyoliaT qalaqis policiis ori
TanamSromeli, romelTac yvelas suraTi gadauRes. etyoba, mips arasodes ar
aviwydeba `iatakqveSelebi~, orive policielis vinaoba da misamarTi Caiwera, im
SemTxvevisaTvis, Tu raime moxda da patiosani holandielebi dasWirda. mipma
agviwera gemrieli kerZebi. Cven, romelTac sauzmeze mxolod ramdenime kovzi
fafa gvaqvs da mere aRar viciT, SimSils ra movuxerxoT, Cven, romlebic
yoveldRe naxevrad mouxarSav ispanaxs (vitaminebis gulisTvis) da dampal
kartofils vWamT, Cven, romlebic cariel kuWebs mxolod salaTiT, kolrabiT
da ispanaxiT vivsebT; ispanaxi, mudam ispanaxi! iqneb amgvari kvebis Sedegad
odesme iseTive Zlierni gavxdeT, rogorc popeie1, (1cnobili multiplikaciuri
filmis gmiri.) Tumca raRac ar mjera.
mips rom Cven qorwilSi waveyvaneT, sxva stumrebs, albaT, araferi
darCebodaT! rom icode, rogor SemovexvieT mips, rogor vugdebdiT yurs,
TiTqos arasodes gvenaxos arc moxdenilad Cacmuli adamianebi da arc
gemrieli kerZebi. da es Cven, milioneris SviliSvilebs. rogor airia yvelaferi
am qveyanaze.
ana

samSabaTi, 9 maisi, 1944

Zvirfaso kiwi!
davamTavre zRapari `feria elen~, karg qaRaldze gadavwere, saTauri
wiTeli melniT gavaforme, koxtad avkinZe da axla mSvenieri sanaxavia. me minda,
es zRapari dabadebis dReze mamas vaCuqo, magram iqneb umniSvnelo saCuqaria? ar
vici. dedam da margom leqsebi daweres.
SuadRisas kraleri movida da gviTxra, rom orSabaTidan qalbatoni b.,
romelic firmis sareklamo ganyofilebas ganagebs, yoveldRe ivlis kontoraSi
swored im dros, roca sxvebs Sesveneba aqvT. Tu marTlac ase moxda, maSin
veRaravin amova CvenTan zeviT, kartofili sxva dros unda moitanon, eli
CvenTan ver isauzmebs, sapirfareSoSi ver SevalT, ganZrevasac ki ver gavbedavT
da a. S. da a. S.
yvelani vcdilobT gamovnaxoT raime sababi da qalbatoni Tavidan
moviSoroT. van daanma aseTi azri gamoTqva: CauyareT yavaSi kuWis asaSleli
fxvnili, iqneb aman gvixsnaso.
ara, wamoiZaxa koophoisma, ara, Tu RmerTi gwamT, maSin aRar
Camova taxtidan!
gamayruebeli xarxari atyda.
taxtidan? ikiTxa qalbatonma van daanma, ki magram ras niSnavs
es?
qalbatons auxsnes.
gana ase amboben? ikiTxa man gulubryvilod.
warmogidgenia, xiTxiTebda eli, bienkofSi1 (1univermaRia
amsterdamSi.) rom ikiTxos, sadaa aq taxtio!
Tu am moxdenil gamoTqmas vixmarT, duseli yovel dRe zustad
pirvelis naxevarze jdeba taxtze.
dRes me Tamamad davwere qaRaldis naglejze:
sapirfareSoTi sargeblobis ganrigi batoni eqimisaTvis!
diliT: 7. 15-dan 7. 30-mde.
dRisiT: pirveli saaTis Semdeg.
mere: survilisamebr!
qaRaldi karze swored maSin davamagre, roca duseli Sig ijda. kargi iyo
damematebina:
`kanonis darRvevis SemTxvevaSi kari daiketeba!~
Cveni sapirfareSos kari garedanac iketeba da Signidanac. oh, kiwi, ra
SesaniSnavi amindia, gareT gasvla rom SemeZlos!
anea
oTxSabaTi, 10 maisi, 1944
Zvirfaso kiwi!
guSin nasadilevs zeviT visxediT da franguls vswavlobdiT, uecrad
momeCvena, TiTqos Cems ukan wyali Cxrialebs. ra aris es? vkiTxe peters,
magram man araferi mipasuxa, radgan mixvda, raSic iyo saqme da sxvenze avarda.
sakmaod uxeSad daavlo xeli muSis, romelic jamis gverdiT Cacucquliyo da
Tavis adgilas dasva. atyda xmauri, magram amasobaSi muSim Tavisi saqme moaTava
da qveviT gaiqca. Turme muSi myudrod mokalaTebuliyo naxerxze, magram mis
mier dayenebuli `tba~ ficrebs Soris CamoiRvara da kartofilian kasrs daesxa.
kartofilic da burbuSelac, romelic mamam guSin saRamos moitana,
saSinlad yarda. sabralo muSi! aba saidan unda gcodnoda, rom torfi ar
iSoveba.
ana
xuTSabaTi, 11 maisi, 1944
Zvirfaso kiwi!
sasacilo ambavi moxda!

peters Tma hqonda SesakreWi, parikmaxeris roli, rogorc yovelTvis,

dedamisma ikisra. peteri Tavis oTaxSi gavida da zustad rvis naxevarze TiTqmis
SiSveli gamocxadda; trusisa da sasporto Custebis meti araferi ecva.
didxans gelodo? hkiTxa dedamiss.
axlave, makratels veZeb!
peteric Seudga Zebnas da qalbaton van daanis magidis ujra gadaaqoTa.
nu amirie yvelaferi, peter.
ver gavige, ra upasuxa peterma, magram pasuxi, albaT, ukmexi iyo, radgan
dedamisma sajdomze Semohkra. peteric aseve moiqca, qalbatonma isev aRmarTa
xeli, magram peteri siciliT gausxlta.
kargi, wavideT, dedabero! uTxra peterma, magram qalbatoni van
daani adgilidan ar daZrula. maSin peterma Ronivrad CasWida xeli majebSi da
oTaxidan TreviT gaiyvana. qalbatoni tiroda, icinoda, ilanZReboda, wixlebs
isroda, magram araferi gauvida. peterma tyve qali kibemde miaTria, magram aq
ukve iZulebuli gaxda xeli gaeSva. qalbatoni van daani isev oTaxSi dabrunda
da xmamaRali oxvriT daeSva skamze.
sakuTari dedis gataceba, vixumre me.
ki magram, xelebi matkina!
me davxede mis gawiTlebul majebs da civi wyliT davusvele. kibeze
gaCerebulma peterma moTmineba dakarga da qamarmomarjvebuli mxecebis
momTvinierebeliviT Semovida oTaxSi, magram qalbatoni van daani mainc ar
gahyva. sawer magidasTan Camomjdari cxvirsaxocs eZebda.
upirveles yovlisa, bodiSi unda moixado!
keTili, bodiSs vixdi, radgan gviandeba.
dedamisma misdauneburad gaicina, fexze wamodga da karisaken wavida,
magram uecrad Tavi valdebulad CaTvala, axsna-ganmarteba moeca CvenTvis, e. i.
mamisaTvis, dedisaTvis da CemTvis. Cven am dros WurWels vrecxavdiT.
Cven saxlSi aseTi ram ar moxdeboda, Tqva man erTs ise Semovkravdi,
rom kibeze davagorebdi (!); ase Tavxedurad arasodes moqceula, radgan xSirad
vcemdi. ai, es aris Tanamedrove aRzrdis Sedegi, oh, es Tanamedrove bavSvebi!
rogor gavbedavdi ase movqceodi dedas. Tqven, batono frank, ase epyrobodiT
dedas?
qalbatoni van daani agznebuli darboda aqeT-iqiT, xan raRacas
gvekiTxeboda, xan gvixsnida da zeviT asasvlelad ar ecala, magram bolos
mainc mogvSorda. ar gasula xuTi wuTi da gaavebuli isev qveviT Camovarda.
vkiTxe, morCiT-meTqi gakreWas, magram man mipasuxa, qveviT meCqarebao da
Tavawyvetili daeSva kibeze. qveviT ki, albaT, Tavis puwis mklavebSi aRmoCnda.
col-qmari mxolod rva saaTze dabrunda. peteri moixmes da daiwyo Cveulebrivi
lanZRva-gineba. Cvenamde mxolod aseTi sityvebi aRwevda: `regveno, umecaro,
uxeiro magaliTs... ana xom... margo ase~... meti veraferi gavigone. xval isev
simSvide da siwynare Camovardeba.
ana
P. S. samSabaTs da oTxSabaTs radioTi Cveni sayvareli dedoflis sityva
movismineT. axla Turme isvenebs, rom ZalRone moikribos da kvlav holandiaSi
dabrundes. imedi maqvs, es male moxdeba. sxvaTa Soris, aseTi ram Tqva: `roca me
davbrundebi... axlovdeba ganTavisuflebis Jami... simamace da mZime gansacdeli...~
Semdeg movismineT ministris, gerbrandis sityva, bolos viRaca sasuliero
piris locva, romelic RmerTs sTxovda daxmareboda ebraelebs, sakoncentracio
banakebsa da cixeebSi gamoketil patimrebs da germaniaSi gandevnilebs.
ana
paraskevi, 12 maisi, 1944
Zvirfaso kiwi!
uamravi saqme maqvs da, Tumca es sityvebi sasacilod JRers, dro ar
myofnis Tavi gavarTva yvelafers. mogiyvebi mokled, ra maqvs gasakeTebeli:
xvalamde unda wavikiTxo galileis biografiis pirveli nawili, radgan wigni

biblioTekas unda daubrunon. daviwye guSin, magram rogorme moverevi. momaval

kviras wasakiTxi maqvs `palestina gzajvaredinze~ da galileis biografiis
meore nawili. guSin davamTavre karlos V pirveli nawili da saswrafod unda
davamuSao yvela amowerili SeniSvnebi da qronologiuri TariRebi. garda amisa,
sxvadasxva wignidan sam gverdze amoviwere ucxo sityvebi, da minda daviswavlo.
punqti meoTxe: kinovarskvlavebis koleqcia sruliad areul-dareulia, rogorme
unda movawesrigo, magram amas ramdenime dRe dasWirdeba, xolo profesor anas,
rogorc vTqvi, samuSao axrCobs; ramdenime xans qaosi qaosad darCeba. amis
Semdeg rigSi dganan Tezeusi, oidiposi, heleusi, orfeosi, iazoni da herkulesi.
maTi sagmiro saqmeebi Wreli ZafebiviT gadaexlarTa erTmaneTs gonebaSi.
kavSiri rom ar dairRves, arc mikenoisa da fidiasis daviwyeba SeiZleba.
TiTqmis aseTive mdgomareobaSia Svidwliani da cxrawliani omebis istoria.
yvelaferi erTmaneTSi ameria. ras izam, roca cudi mexsiereba gaqvs!
warmoidgine, ra gulmaviwyi viqnebi oTxmoci wlis asakSi. marTla, biblia! kidev
cota da mival im adgilamde, sadac susanas banaobaa aRwerili. ho, marTla, ra
codva awva sodomsa da gomoras? jer kidev bevri ram unda gavigo da viswavlo!
jerjerobiT lizelot pfalcelisaTvis sul ver movicale.
Tavad xedav, kiwi, lamisaa davixrCo!
da kidev erTi: Sen ici, Cemi didi xnis sanukvari ocnebaa, gavxde jer
Jurnalisti, Semdeg ki mwerali. dro dagvanaxvebs, ganxorcieldeba odesme Cemi
swrafva didebisaken, Tu es mxolod gandidebis maniaa. Tumca axlac bevri Tema
maqvs. yovel SemTxvevaSi, omis Semdeg gamovcem wigns saTauriT: `TavSesafari~.
ar vici, moxerxdeba es Tu ara, magram safuZvlad Cemi `dRiuri~ daedeba. garda
am wignisa, kidev bevr rameze vfiqrob, magram am fiqrebs mxolod maSin
gagacnob, roca garkveulad Camoyalibdeba.
ana
SabaTi, 13 maisi, 1944
Zvirfaso kiwi!
guSin mamas dabadebis dRe iyo. deda da mama 19 wlis win daqorwindnen.
kontoridan yvela wavida, damlagebeli qalic ki. qveviT aravin iyo. wels jer
ar yofila aseTi naTeli mze. Cveni wabli Ziridan kenweromde ayvavebulia da
ufro lamazia, vidre gasul wels iyo.
koophoisma mamas lineis biografia aCuqa, kralerma bunebismetyvelebis
istoria, duselma `amsterdami wyalze~, van daanma ki iseTi kalaTa, rom
saukeTeso dekoratoric ver gaakeTebda. kalaTaSi ido: sami kvercxi, erTi
boTli ludi, erTi boTli kefiri da mwvane halstuxi. Cveni jemiT savse qila
amasTan SedarebiT sacodavad gamoiyureboda, magram, Cemi vardebi mipisa da
elis mosakiTxTan SedarebiT saocrad surnelovani iyo. mixakebs suni ara aqvs,
Tumca Zalian lamazia. mama didad gaanebivra yvelam. moutanes 50 cali
namcxvari. SesaniSnavia! mama yvelas Taflis kverebiT gagvimaspinZlda. garda
amisa, mamakacebs ludi dausxa, Cven kefiri. didebulad vidResaswauleT!
ana
samSabaTi, 16 maisi, 1944
Zvirfaso kiwi!
radgan am Temaze didixania ar gvisaubria, gadmogcem umniSvnelo davas,
romelic guSin baton da qalbaton van daanebs Soris moxda.
qalbatoni van daani: germanelebma Zlier gaamagres atlantikis
sangrebi da yvelafers gaakeTeben imisaTvis, rom ingliselebi napirze ar
gadmouSvan. germanelebi uaRresad Zlierni arian!
batoni van daani: o, ra Tqma unda...
qalbatoni: diax, diax!
batoni: Tu germanelebi ase Zlierni arian, unda gaimarjvon kidec, ara?
qalbatoni: SeiZleba asec moxdes, me sulac ara var darwmunebuli, rom
piriqiT iqneba.

batoni: jobia, dageTanxmo.

qalbatoni: magram Sen yovelTvis medavebi, Tavs ver ikaveb!
batoni: Cems laparaks araviTari mniSvneloba ara aqvs.
qalbatoni: da mainc medavebi, ginda damimtkico, rom marTali xar.
magram Seni winaswarmetyveleba arasodes ar marTldeba.
batoni: aqamde yovelTvis marTldeboda!
qalbatoni: ara, marTals ar ambob. Seni varaudiT jarebi gasul wels
unda gadmoesxaT, fineTTan zavi unda daedoT, italias jer kidev zamTarSi
moReboda bolo, xolo rusebs lvovi unda aeRoT, o, ara, Sens
winaswarmetyvelebas arafrad vagdeb.
batoni: (dgeba) aba, girCevnia ena Caiwyvito, me Sen dagimtkiceb, rom
marTali var, rom Sen araferi gesmis. aRar SemiZlia amdeni bodvis mosmena.
kacma cxviri unda Cagayofinos Sensave nabodvarSi!
farda eSveba
P. S. Tavi veRar Sevikave, vxarxarebdi TavdaviwyebiT. icinoda dedac.
peteri Zlivs ikavebda sicils. ra sulelebi arian ufrosebi. jobia, jer
TavianTi Tavi aRzardon da mere mosTxovon bavSvebs amdeni!
ana
paraskevi, 19 maisi, 1944
Zvirfaso kiwi!
guSin Zalze cudad vgrZnobdi Tavs. guli mereoda, muceli mtkioda,
yovelgvari sisaZagle mWirda. erTi sityviT, uaresis warmodgena SeuZlebelia.
saSinlad mSia, magram wiTeli lobios Wamas isev uWmeloba mirCevnia. me da
peteri kargad vewyobiT erTmaneTs. sawyal biWs Cemze metad sWirdeba alersi.
yovel saRamos, roca kocniT veTxovebiT erTmaneTs, saSinlad wiTldeba da
memudareba, rom kidev erTi kocna gavimeto. iqneb me misTvis kata mofis magieri
var? Tumca arc ase vgrZnob Tavs cudad. igi Zalze bednieria, mas Semdeg, rac
icis, rom viRacas uyvars.
me didi gaWirvebiT movipove is, da axla mTlianad Cems xelSia. ar
ifiqro, rom Cemi siyvaruli Sesustda. peteri SesaniSnavi ymawvilia, magram Cemi
suli kvlav Caiketa da imisaTvis rom xelaxla gaiRos, Zlieri gasaRebia
saWiro.
ana
SabaTi, 20 maisi, 1944
Zvirfaso kiwi!
guSin dabla Cavedi da davinaxe, rom mSvenieri larnaki mixakebianad
iatakze egdo. muxlebze daCoqili deda iataks wmendda, margo ki Zirs dayril
Cems qaRaldebs krefda. `ra moxda?~ vikiTxe SeSinebulma da guli SemekumSa.
pasuxi saWiro ar iyo, isedac kargad vxedavdi, rac moxda. Cemi saqaRalde,
romelSic mefeTa genealogias vinaxavdi, rveulebi, wignebi, yvelaferi wyalSi
curavda. kinaRam avtirdi. ise vRelavdi, rom aRar maxsovs, ras vambobdi, magram
Semdeg margom miambo, rogor vluRluRebdi: `o, ra aunazRaurebeli zaralia, ra
saSinelebaa, yvelaferi moispo, yvelaferi daiRupa!~. da kidev raRac amdagvars.
mamam, margom da dedam xmamaRla gadaixarxares. me ki tirilis gunebaze viyavi.
ramdeni dro, ramdeni Sroma daiRupa. Tumca, roca davakvirdi, aunazRaurebeli
`zarali~ arc ise didi aRmoCnda. iatakze damjdari miwebebul qaRaldebs
erTmaneTs vacilebdi, vasworebdi, Semdeg ki gasaSrobad sarecxis Tokze
davkide. sasacilo sanaxaobaa karlos mexuTis gverdiT hkidia vilhelm
oraneli, xolo mas gverds umSvenebs maria antuaneta.
`es aris Rassenschande~1 moswrebulad Tqva van daanma. qaRaldebis
meTvalyureoba peters davavale da qveviT Cavedi.
romeli wigni gafuWda? vkiTxe margos, romelic Cemi wignebis
saganZuris gadaTvalierebas Sesdgomoda.

 algebris saxelmZRvanelo, miTxra man, magram, Cemda samwuxarod,

algebris saxelmZRvanelo didad ar dazianebula. vnanob, rom mTlianad ar
dalba wyalSi. arasodes ar migrZvnia wignebisadmi iseTi siZulvili, rogorc
algebris saxelmZRvanelosadmi. Tavfurcelze sul cota ocamde gogonas gvari
aweria, uwin ,albaT, maTi sakuTreba iyo. wigni sruliad gayviTlebula,
gacveTili da aWrelebulia uamravi SesworebiT. odesme cxel gulze nakuwebad
vaqcev am sazizRrobas.
ana
orSabaTi, 22 maisi, 1944
Zvirfaso kiwi!
20 maiss mamam qalbaton van daanTan sanaZleo waago xuTi boTli
kefiri. jarebis gadmosxma marTlac ar momxdara. Tamamad SemiZlia vTqva, rom
mTeli amsterdami, mTeli holandia, evropis mTeli dasavleTi sanapiro vidre
espaneTamde, dRe da Rame mxolod jarebis gadmosxmaze laparakobs, sanaZlos
debs da imedovnebs.
daZabuloba matulobs da TiTqmis autanelia. bevr `karg~ holandielsac
ki aRar swams ingliselebis. yvelas rodi miaCnia inglisuri `blefi~ nacad
xerxad, ara, adamianebs surT dainaxon saqme, didi, sagmiro saqmeebi! sakuTari
cxviris iqiT veravin verafers xedavs. aravin fiqrobs, rom ingliselebi
ibrZvian sakuTari interesebisaTvis, Tavisi samSoblosaTvis. TiToeuls hgonia,
rom ingliselebi valdebuli arian, rac SeiZleba male, rac SeiZleba ukeTesad
ixsnan holandia. magram ra movaleni arian ingliselebi Cvens winaSe; riT
daimsaxures holandielebma is sulgrZeli daxmareba, rasac ase mouTmenlad
elian? o, nu ityueben Tavs holandielebi. miuxedavad `blefisa~, ingliselebs
mainc ar dausxamT Tavslafi ise, rogorc amJamad okupirebulma didma da
patara qveynebma. ingliselebs araferi ar sWirT CvenTan bodiSis mosaxdeli,
radgan Tu imas vusayvedurebT, rom eZinaT, roca germania iaraRdeboda, iseve
eZina sxva qveynebsac, gansakuTrebiT germaniis mosazRvre qveynebs. siraqlemis
politikiT rom Sors ver wavalT, es inglissac esmis da mTel msofliosac.
axla ki mokavSireebi da aseve inglisic iZulebulni arian yoveldRiurad
msxverpli gaiRon. arc erTi qveyana ar moutans sakuTar xalxs msxverplad
meore xalxis interesebs. amas arc inglisi gaakeTebs. jarebis gadmosxmas,
ganTavisuflebas, Tavisuflebas odesme veRirsebiT, magram vadebs inglisi da
amerika daaadgenen da ara okupirebuli qveynebis xalxebi.
samwuxarod, Cvenamde aRwevs xmebi, rom ganwyobileba ebraelTa mimarT
Seicvala da axla antisemitizmi iseT wreebSic mZvinvarebs, romelTac uwin
amaze arc ki ufiqriaT. Cvenze es garemoeba saSinlad moqmedebs. ebraelebisadmi
siZulvili gasagebia, magram amgvari siZulvili dafuZnebulia gaugebrobaze.
qristianebi ebraelebs imas usayvedureben, rom ebraelebi germanelebis winaSe
Tavs imcireben, TavianTi mfarvelebis gacemas ar eridebian da amis gamo bevr
qristians mZime sasjeli atydeba Tavs. yvelaferi es marTalia, magram aqac,
rogorc yvela sxva SemTxvevaSi, medlis ukana mxaresac unda SevxedoT. gana
qristianebi Cvens adgilze sxvagvarad moiqceodnen? gana SeuZlia adamians, sul
erTia qristiani iqneba is Tu ebraeli, gauZlos germanelebis wamebas? yvelam
icis, rom es SeuZlebelia. maSin, raRa ebraelebisagan Txouloben SeuZlebels.
aralegalur wreebSi CurCuleben, rom holandiaSi emigrirebul da Semdeg
poloneTSi gagzavnil germanel ebraelebs holandiaSi dabrunebis uflebas
aRar miscemen. holandiam isini Seifara, magram, rogorc ki hitlers gandevnian,
isev germaniaSi unda dabrundneno. gesmis yvelaferi es da ekiTxebi sakuTar
Tavs: Tu asea, raRa saWiro iyo es mZime da xangrZlivi omi? Cven yoveldRe
gvesmis, rom yvelam simarTlisa, Tavisuflebisa da samarTlianobisaTvis unda
vibrZoloT. da ai, am brZolis procesSi iwyeba ganxeTqileba da ebraeli isev
yvelaze uaresia. samwuxaroa, Zalze samwuxaro, rom ager ukve meramdenejer
marTldeba Zveli naTqvami: `Tu qristiani raimes cuds sCadis, TviTon agebs
pasuxs, Tu ebraeli damnaSavea yvela ebraeli!~.

gulaxdilad rom giTxra, me ver gamigia, rogor moxda, rom

holandielebi, es patiosani da samarTliani xalxi, Cvenze ase msjeloben;
Cvenze, mTel msoflioSi yvelaze daCagrul da yvelaze ubedur xalxze. me
mxolod erTi ram maimedebs: Cvendami siZulvili gauvliT da holandielebi
dagvanaxeben, sinamdvileSi rogorebi arian. imedi maqvs, rom isini arc axla da
arc Semdeg ar uRalateben samarTlianobis grZnobas! antisemitizmi ki
usamarTlobaa!
me miyvars holandia. imedi mqonda, rom samSoblodakarguli aq vpovebdi
meore samSoblos. Tumca jer ar damikargavs imedi!
ana
xuTSabaTi, 25 maisi, 1944
Zvirfaso kiwi!
yoveldRe xdeba rame usiamovno! dRes diliT daapatimres Cveni keTili
memwvanile, Turme saxlSi or ebraels malavda. es CvenTvis mZime laxvaria da
ara marto imitom, rom sabralo ebraelebi ufskrulis piras dganan, aramed am
sacodavi kacis bedi gvawuxebs.
mTeli qveyana gagiJda. wesier adamianebs sakoncentracio banakebSi,
cixeebSi, karcerebSi amwyvdeven, xolo moxucsa da axalgazrdas, mdidarsa da
Raribs naZiralebi yvlefen da tyavs aZroben. zogs iWeren imis gamo, rom Sav
bazarze raRaca iyida, zogs ki imisaTvis, rom ebraelebs an iatakqveSelebs
malavda. aravin icis, ra elis xval. memwvanilis dapatimreba CvenTvis mZime
danaklisia. Cvens qaliSvilebs ar SeuZliaT da arc arian valdebulni TviTon
gvizidon kartofili. Cven mxolod erTiRa dagvrCenia, rac SeiZleba cota
vWamoT. vnaxoT, rogor movaxerxebT, amas mere mogwer, magram am ambavSi
sasiamovno araferia. deda ambobs, diliT sauzme aRar gveqnebao, sadilad
mxolod puri da fafa, saRamos Semwvari kartofili, xolo kviraSi orjer
salaTa an cotaodeni bostneuli. ase rom, viSimSilebT, magram yvelaferze
ufro saSineli mainc is iqneba, Tu aRmogvaCines.
ana
paraskevi, 26 maisi, 1944
Zvirfaso kiwi!
rogorc iqna, meRirsa. vzivar Cems magidasTan fanjris win, romelic
odnav gamoRebulia da minda yvelaferi, yvelaferi mogwero.
ise miWirs, rogorc didi xania aRar gamWirvebia. mZarcvelebis Tavdasxmis
Semdegac ki ar vyofilvar Sinaganad da garegnulad ase ganadgurebuli. erTi
mxriv: memwvanilis dapatimreba, ebraelTa sakiTxi, razedac Cvenebi
dausruleblad msjeloben, gadmosxmis gaWianureba, cudi sakvebi, daZabuloba,
naRvliani ganwyobileba, peterze gulis acrueba, xolo meore mxriv elis
daniSvna, stumrebi, cekvis dRe, yvavilebi, kraleris dabadebis dRe, tortebi da
saubari kinofilmebze, kabareze, koncertebze. yvelaze uaresi swored es
Seusabamobaa, es saSineli Seusabamoba; erT dRes CvenSi sicils iwvevs
yovelgvari situacia, rac iatakqveS cxovrebas Tan axlavs, meore dRes ki kvlav
SiSi gvipyrobs da yvela Cvenganis saxeze SegiZlia amoikiTxo SiSi, daZabuloba
da sasowarkveTileba. mipsa da kralers Cvens gamo uzarmazari tvirTi awevT
mxrebze. mipi bevrs muSaobs, kralers ki iseTi didi pasuxismgebloba akisria,
rom zojer veRar uZlebs amden nerviulobas da aRelvebas da laparaki uWirs.
koophoisi da elic did mzrunvelobas iCenen Cvens mimarT, magram zogjer,
ramdenime saaTiT, an ori-sami dRiT mainc vaviwydebiT. maT TavianTi sazrunavi
aqvT: koophoiss sakuTari janmrTeloba, elis ki jvariswera, rac arc ise
daubrkoleblad mimdinareobs. magram dro da dro maT SeuZliaT Tavi daaRwion
sazrunavs, wavidnen stumrad da, saerTod, maTi cxovreba Cveulebrivi gziT
midis. maTi daZabuloba droebiT mainc klebulobs, Cveni ki arasodes. ukve ori
welia, rac ase grZeldeba da ar viciT, ramden xans unda gavuwioT kidev
winaaRmdegoba am yoveldRiurad mzard, autanel wvalebas?

kanalizacia gamognesilia, wylis Casxma ar SeiZleba, an ukidures

SemTxvevaSi wveTwveTobiT; sapirfareSoSi Sesvla ar SeiZleba da Tu Sexval,
jagrisi unda waiRo Tan; WuWyian wyals minis did qilaSi vasxamT. jer kidev
araferi, magram ra gveSveleba, Tu ostatma dazianebuli kanalizacia ver
SeakeTa. Cvens ubanSi kanalizaciis kapitaluri remonti mxolod momaval kviras
daiwyeba.
mipma gamogvigzavna qiSmiSiani funTuSa da aseTi werili: `mxiarulad
gagetarebinoT sameba~. amgvari sityvebi dacinva ufroa. aba ra mxiarulebaze
SeiZleba laparaki, roca saSineli ganwyobileba gvaqvs da SiSiT varT
Sepyrobilni. mas Semdeg, rac memwvanile daiWires, Cven isev davSindiT. yoveli
mxridan ismis: `su, su, su~. da yvela cdilobs siCume daicvas. memwvaniles
policiam kari Seumtvria, amisgan arc Cvena varT dazRveulni. vTqvaT da uecrad
CvenTanac... ara, ar minda davwero, magram arc is SemiZlia, rom amaze ar
vifiqro; piriqiT: SiSi, romelic erTxel ganvicade, kvlav dameufla da Cems win
mTeli saSinelebiT aRimarTa.
guSin saRamos rva saaTze marto Cavedi sapirfareSoSi. dabla aravin iyo,
yvela radios usmenda. mindoda simamace gamomeCina, magram Zalian gamiWirda. aq
zeviT ufro Tavdajerebuli var, vidre qveviT, did mdumare saxlSi; zevidan
momdinare idumali bgerebi da quCidan SemoWrili manqanebis guguni marto
darCenils Tavzarsa mcems. Tu ar avCqardi da Seqmnil mdgomareobaze fiqri
daviwye, mTeli sxeuli miTrTis da akviatebuli azri ar mcildeba. gana
damalvasa da amdeni saSinelebis gadatanas sikvdili ar jobda! maSin arc Cven
mfarvelebs CavagdebdiT safrTxeSi, magram amaze fiqric ki gvafrTxobs. jer
kidev vebRauWebiT sicocxles, CvenSi jer kidev ar CaxSobila bunebis xma, jer
kidev vimedovnebT, imedi gvaqvs, rom momavali ukeTesi iqneba. oRond male,
Tundac dagvxvriton, magram male moxdes, rac mosaxdenia. gaurkvevlobaze ufro
Zneli asatani araferia. dae, damTavrdes yvelaferi, damTavrdes avad an kargad,
radgan is mainc gvecodineba, gavimarjveT Tu daviRupeT.
ana
oTxSabaTi, 31 maisi, 1944
Zvirfaso kiwi!
SabaTs, kviras, orSabaTs da samSabaTs ise Tbiloda, rom avtokalams
xeli ver movkide da amitomac araferi damiweria. paraskevs isev gafuWda
kanalizacia, magram SabaTs SeakeTes. naSuadRevs qalbatoni koophoisi gvestumra
da bevri ram gviambo korize, romelic iopisTan erTad hokeis klubis wevri
gamxdara. kviras movida eli, unda enaxa, kari isev xom ar SemoumtvreviaTo, da
CvenTan isauzma. orSabaTs (meore dRes) TavSesafarSi henk van santeni
morigeobda. samSabaTs neba dagvrTes, cotaTi mainc gamogveRo fanjara. aseTi
SesaniSnavi, Tbili, SeiZleba iTqvas, cxeli sameba iSviaTia, magram aq
TavSesafarSi sicxe saSinelebaa da warmodgena rom Segeqmnes, mokled agiwer im
cxel dReebs.
SabaTi: ra SesaniSnavi, ra didebuli amindia, Tqva yvelam diliT.
ra iqneba, rom ase ar cxelodes, amboben dRisiT, roca fanjrebis daxurvis
droa.
kvira: autaneli sicxea, karaqi dneba. mTel saxlSi gril kuTxes ver
ipovi. puri xmeba, rZe iWreba, fanjris gaReba ar SeiZleba. sxvebi gareT
daseirnoben. Cven ki, sabralo gankicxulni, vsxedvarT aq da vixrCobiT.
orSabaTi fexebi mtkiva, sazafxulo Casacmeli ara maqvs, ar SemiZlia
aseT sicxeSi WurWlis recxva! ambobs qalbatoni van daani. marTlac,
gagviWirda. sicxes verc me vitan advilad da mixaria, rom dRes qaric uberavs
da mzec anaTebs.
ana
orSabaTi, 5 ivnisi, 1944
Zvirfaso kiwi!

Cvens TavSesafarSi axali usiamovneba Camovarda. duseli gvemduris.

mizezi sruliad umniSvneloa: karaqis ganawileba. duseli dagvnebda. misi da
qalbaton van daanis urRvevi megobroba aRdga. isev pirze kocna, sandomiani
Rimili, arSiyoba. duseli gazafxulis cieb-cxelebam aitana.
mexuTe armiam romi aiRo. qalaqi ar ganadgurebula. ar daubombavT.
gvaklia bostneuli da kartofili. amindi cudia. didxans dauzogavad
bombavdnen pa-de-kales da safrangeTis mTel sanapiros.
ana
samSabaTi, 6 ivnisi, 1944
Zvirfaso kiwi!
`This is D.day~1, gamoacxada inglisis radiom 12 saaTze da marTalic Tqva!
This is the day2. jarebis gadmosxma daiwyo diliT rva saaTze. ingliselebma
gadmosces: Cvenma TviTmfrinavebma Zlier dabombes kale, buloni, havri, Serburi
da rogorc yovelTvis pa-de-kale. Semdeg ki mTeli mosaxleobis
gasafrTxileblad gamoacxades okupirebuli raionebis yvela mcxovrebi unda
elodes dabombvas sanapirodan 35 kilometris manZilze. Tu SesaZlebloba
miecemaT, ingliselebi erTi saaTiT adre Camoyrian gamafrTxilebel furclebs.
germanelTa cnobebis Tanaxmad, safrangeTis sanapiroze ingliseli
paraSutistebi daeSvnen. bi-bi-sis cnobiT germanelebis samxedro-sazRvao jarebi
ingliselebis sadesanto jarebs ebrZvian.
diliT 9 saaTze TavSesafarSi aseTi diskusia gaimarTa: iqneb sacdeli
desantia, rogorc es ori wlis winaT deepTan moxda?
aT saaTze daiwyo inglisis radiogadacema germanul, holandiur,
frangul da sxva enebze: `The invasion has degun!~1. (1 SemoWra daiwyo (ingl.).)
ase rom, namdvilad SemoiWrnen! Tormet saaTze inglisis radiogadacema
germanul enaze: sityviT gamovida mTavarsardali generali duait eizenhaueri.
12 saaTze inglisis radiogadacema inglisur enaze: `This is D.day~. generali
eizenhaueri mimarTavs frang xalxs:
`Stiff fighting will come now, but after this the victory. The year 1944 is the year of complete
victory, good luck!~.2 (2 Cven sastiki brZola mogvelis, magram win gvidevs
gamarjveba. 1944 weli sruli gamarjvebis welia! (ingl.).)
inglisis radiogadacema pirvel saaTze: 11 aTasi TviTmfrinavi
Seusvenebliv haerSia, gadahyavT jarebi, bombaven zurgs. 4000 sadesanto da
mcire moculobis sazRvao gemebs ganuwyvetliv gadahyavT jarebi da gadaaqvT
xmeleTze saomari masala Serbursa da havrs Sors, inglisisa da amerikis
jarebi ukve Caebnen sastik brZolaSi. sityva warmoTqves gerbrandim, belgiis
premier ministrma, norvegiis mefem da, ra Tqma unda, CerCilma.
TavSesafarSi dabneulobaa. nuTu marTla axlovdeba didi xnis nanatri
Tavisufleba, Tavisufleba, romelzedac amdens vlaparakobdiT. yovelive es
imdenad didebuli, imdenad zRaprulia, rom ara mjera, Tu odesme sinamdviled
iqceva. mogvitans ki gamarjvebas 1944 weli? Cven jer ar viciT es, magram imediT
vsuldgmulobT, Zala da mxneoba gvemateba. diax, Cven vaJkacurad unda
davZlioT SiSi, gaWirveba, mwuxareba. axla umTavresia simSvide da simtkice. rom
ar ayvirde, ufro magrad unda Seikra kriWa. tkivilisagan SeiZleba ayvirdes
safrangeTi, ruseTi, italia, germaniac ki, magram Cven ara gvaqvs amis ufleba.
o, kiwi, ra kargia, roca grZnob, rom megobrebi giaxlovdebian! am
saSinelma germanelebma imden xans gvawvales, imden xans eWiraT dana Cvens
yelTan, rom megobrebze da gadarCenaze fiqric ki rwmenas gvinergavs! axla
marto Cvenze, ebraelebze rodia laparaki, axla laparakoben holandiaze, mTel
evropaze. iqneb seqtemberSi an oqtomberSi isev wavide skolaSi, ambobs margo!
P. S. ukanasknel cnobebs dauyovnebliv gadmogcem:
Rame da gaTenebisas germanelTa zurgSi Tivisagan gakeTebuli fitulebi
da manekenebi CauSves, romlebic miwis SexebisTanave feTqdebodnen. daeSvnen
paraSutistebic. isini Savad iyvnen SeniRbulni, raTa RamiT ar SeemCniaT. diliT,

mas Semdeg, rac miwaze 5 milioni kilogrami yumbara Camoyares, daiwyo desantis
gadmosxma. dRes brZolaSi monawileobs 20.000 TviTmfrinavi. sanam desantis
gadmosxma daiwyeboda, germanelebis yvela sanapiro batarea mwyobridan
gamoiyvanes. Seiqmna momcro placdarmi. Tumca cudi amindia, magram mainc
yvelaferi kargad midis. armiac, xalxic `one will and one hope~1-iTaa (1 erTi
surviliT, erTi imediT (ingl.).) gamsWvaluli.
ana
paraskevi, 9 ivnisi, 1944
Zvirfaso kiwi!
jarebis gadmosxma brwyinvaled mimdinareobs! mokavSireebma daikaves baio,
sofeli safrangeTis sanapiroze. axla kaienisaTvis ibrZvian. amocana naTelia,
mosWran naxevarkunZuli, romelzedac Serburia gaSenebuli. samxedro
mimomxilvelebi yovel saRamos gviyvebian, Tu ra siZneleebs awydebian jarebi,
da ra zRaprul gambedaobasa da simamaces iCenen aRfrTovanebuli jariskacebi.
radioTi inglisSi dabrunebulma daWrilebmac ilaparakes. miuxedavad cudi
amindisa, sahaero Tavdasxma grZeldeba. bi-bi-sim gadmosca, rom Turme CerCilsac
surda jarebTan erTad monawileoba mieRo desantis gadmosxmaSi, magram
eizenhauerisa da sxva generlebis rCeva yurad iRo da inglisSi darCa. xedav, ra
mamaci berikacia, axla albaT samocdaaT welsaa gadacilebuli!
Cven cota davmSviddiT, vimedovnebT, rom omi am wlis damlevamde
damTavrdeba. droc aris!
qalbatoni van daanis metiCroba autanelia. radgan jarebis gadmosxmaze
laparakiT aRar SeuZlia tvini gviRrZos, axla cudi amindis gamo gviwyalebs
guls. minda, Tavi civi wyliT savse vedroSi Cavayofino.
garda van daanisa da peterisa, yvelam waikiTxa `ungruli rafsodia~,
kompozitorisa da virtuozis franc listis biografia. wigni Zalze
sainteresoa, magram me mgonia, avtori bevrs laparakobs qalebze. listi Tavis
droze ara marto didi da saxelganTqmuli pianisti iyo, aramed 70 wlamde
qalebis didi madevaric. hyvarebia mari dagu, Tavadis qali karolina
vitgenSteini, mocekvave lola montesi, pianisti agnes kingvorsi, sofia monteri,
Cerqezi Tavadis qali olga ianina. baronesa olga meiendorfi, msaxiobi lila...
gvari damaviwyda da a. S. da a. S. bolo ar uCans! magram wignis is adgilebi,
romlebSic musikasa da xelovnebazea laparaki, meti interesiT ikiTxeba. vin
araa moxsenebuli: Sumani, klara viki, heqtor berliozi, iohanes bramsi,
beThoveni, ioaximi, rixard vagneri, hans fon biulovi, anton rubinSteini,
frederik Sopeni, viqtor hiugo, onore de balzaki, kileri, humeli, Cerni,
rosini, kerubini, paganini, mendelsoni da sxva mravali.
listi kargi kaci iyo. Zalian didsulovani, Tavmdabali, magram saSinlad
amayi. exmareboda yvelas, yvelaferze maRla ayenebda xelovnebas,
Tavdaviwyebamde uyvarda qalebi da koniaki, ver itanda cremlebs. erTi sityviT,
namdvili jentlmeni iyo. uariT aravin gaustumrebia, arafrad agdebda fuls,
uyvarda maRali sazogadoeba da religiis Tavisuflebas aRiarebda.
ana
samSabaTi, 13 ivnisi, 1944
Zvirfaso kiwi!
Cemi dabadebis dRe ukan darCa. TxuTmetis gavxdi. sakmaod bevri ram
maCuqes: Springeris xelovnebis istoriis TxuTmettomeuli, sacvlebis
garnituri, ori sartyeli, erTi cxvirsaxoci, ori boTli kefiri, erTi qila
jemi, namcxvrebi, dedam da mamam botanikis saxelmZRvanelo momarTves, margom
oqros samajuri, van daanebma kidev erTi wigni, duselma biomalci, mipma da
elim rveulebi da tkbileuloba, kralerma wigni `maria-tereza~ da sami naWeri
namdvili yveli. peterma vardebis SesaniSnavi Taiguli. sawyali biWi, bevri
ecada, rame eSova CemTvis, magram veraferi moaxerxa.

miuxedavad saSineli amindisa, jarebis gadmosxma brwyinvaled midis, zRva

Zlier Relavs da kokispirulad wvims.
CerCili, smetsi, eizenhaueri da arnoldi guSin ingliselebisagan
ganTavisuflebul frangul sofels ewvivnen. CerCili Camosula satorpedo
kateriT, romlisTvisac napiridan cecxli dauSeniaT. am kacma, iseve rogorc
bevrma mamakacma, sruliad ar icis, ra aris SiSi. o, rogor mSurs!
Cveni TavSesafridan verc dainaxav da verc mixvdebi, Tu ra ganwyobilebaa
holandiaSi. cxadia, xalxi gaxarebulia, rom `arafris maqnisi~ (!) inglisi
bolos amoqmedda. erTi magrad unda SeanjRrio yvela, vinc ingliselebs
zemodan dahyurebs, lanZRavs ingliss, agdebiT ixseniebs mis mTavrobas,
ingliselebs mxdalebs uwodebs da amave dros germanelebi sZuls. iqneb maSin
maTi areuli tvini isev dalagdes!
ana
oTxSabaTi, 14 ivnisi, 1944
Zvirfaso kiwi!
imdeni survili, azri, braldeba da sayveduri mitrialebs TavSi, rom
yvelaferi erTmaneTSi airia. kiwi, me marTla arc ise didi warmodgena maqvs
Cems Tavze, rogorc sxvebs hgonia. me sxvebze ukeT vici, rom uamravi nakli maqvs
da usaqcielo var, magram gansxvaveba isaa, rom minda gamovsworde,
gamovswordebi kidec, ukve sagrZnoblad gamovswordi. xSirad vekiTxebi Cems
Tavs: ratom hgoniaT sxvebs, rom didi warmodgena maqvs Cems Tavze, ratom
mTvlian mouridebel adamianad? nuTu marTlac didi warmodgenisa var Cems
Tavze? iqneb TviTon arian aseTebi? raRac meSleba, magram am winadadebas mainc
ar amovSli, radgan arc ise areulia, qalbaton van daans, Cems mTavar
bralmdebels, yvela icnobs, rogorc uWkuos, pirdapir rom vTqva, rogorc
sulels; xolo suleli adamianebi ver ineleben, roca vinme maTze ukeT akeTebs
rames.
qalbatoni van daani mxolod imitom mTvlis sulelad, rom masaviT Steri
ara var, imitom meZaxis mouridebels, rom TviTonac utifaria. Cems kabebze
ambobs, mokleao, TviTon ki ufro mokle acvia. me Tavdajerebulad mTvlis,
TviTon ki mudam eCreba saubarSi da iseT Temebze msjelobs, razedac
warmodgena ara aqvs. erT-erTi Cemi sayvareli andaza aseTia: `yoveli sayveduri
nawilobriv simarTlesac Seicavs~. amitom winaswar vacxadeb, rom zogjer
marTlac var zedmetad Tavdajerebuli. erTi ubedureba mWirs, Cems Tavs sxvebze
metad me TviTon vakritikeb da vesayvedurebi. yovelive amas xSirad dedis
notaciebic emateba da imdeni qadageba mesmis, rom mgoni, amden Segonebas
verasodes davaRwev Tavs. amitom uxeSi da ukmexi vxdebi da uneburad veWidebi
`anes~ Zvel sayvarel frazas: `Cemi aravis esmis~. es sityvebi gamjdaria CemSi da
SeiZleba umarTebulo geCvenos, magram amaSi simarTlis raRac nawili mainc
aris. zogjer sakuTari Tavis gmoba iqamde midis, rom manugeSebeli xma
mWirdeba, romelic yvelafers aRadgens da Cems sulier samyaros Caswvdeba;
samwuxarod, bevri veZebe, magram aseTi adamiani jer ver mipovnia. vici, kiwi, rom
Sen am wuTSi peterze fiqrob! marTalia, mas vuyvarvar, magram ara rogorc
satrfo, aramed rogorc megobari. dRiTi dRe sul ufro meCveva, magram aris
Cvens Soris raRac idumali, CemTvis gaugebari, romelic orives gvabrkolebs.
zogjer mgonia, misi naxvis survils vazviadeb da arc ise menatreba, magram
sakmarisia, ori dRe ar vnaxo da ise gamiwevs guli misken, rogorc manamde
arasodes. peteri SesaniSnavi sayvareli ymawvilia, magram mainc unda vTqva, rom
bevri ram masze guls micruebs. uwinares yovlisa, rom belgias mTlianad
ganudga, meorec, misi laparaki Wamaze da sxva wvrilmanze sruliad ar momwons,
magram me mtkiced var darwmunebuli, rom pirobas SevasrulebT da arasodes ar
viCxubebT. peteri gulkeTili, Tavaziani da damTmobia. igi gacilebiT met
SeniSvnas itans Cemgan, vidre dedisagan. mondomebiT cdilobs wesrigi daamyaros
Tavis ojaxSi. magram ratom aris Caketili sakuTar naWuWSi, ratom ar maZlevs
uflebas Sevexo misi sulis simebs? marTalia, igi Cemze gulCaTxrobilia,

magram me sakuTari gamocdilebiT vici, rom yvelaze gulCaTxrobil

adamianebsac ki zogjer enatrebaT gulis mesaidumle. me da peterma wlebi
TavSesafarSi gavatareT da aq miveCvieT fiqrs. xSirad vlaparakobdiT
warsulze, awmyoze, momavalze, magram, rogorc giTxari, namdvili grZnoba
maklia da amave dros isic danamdvilebiT vici, aseTi grZnoba arsebobs.
ana
xuTSabaTi, 15 ivnisi, 1944
Zvirfaso kiwi!
iqneb imitom vgrZnob ase Zlier bunebas, rom amdeni xania, karSi cxviri ar
gamiyvia? me SesaniSnavad maxsovs, rom adre CemSi did aRtacebas arc Citebis
galoba iwvevda, arc gaSlili yvavilebi, arc sxivmfeni lurji ca da arc
mTvaris Suqi. axla yvelaferi Seicvala. magaliTad, samebas, roca Tbili
amindebi idga, didi gaWirvebiT vikavebdi Tavs, rom ar damZineboda da Tormetis
naxevramde martos mecqira fanjridan mTvarisaTvis. samwuxarod, Cemi msxverpli
amao aRmoCnda, radgan mTvare ise kaSkaSebda, rom fanjris gamoReba ver gavbede.
meore ambavi ramdenime Tvis winaT moxda. SemTxveviT zeviT avedi da fanjara
Ria damxvda. sanam oTaxs aniavebdnen, Zirs aRar Camovsulvar. bnelma, wvimianma
saRamom, qariSxalma da caze mocurave Rrublebma saSineli ZaliT gamitaca,
damipyro. wlinaxevris Semdeg pirvelad videqi RamesTan pirispir. im dRidan
yovelive amis kidev erTxel gancdis survili ufro didi iyo CemSi, vidre
virTxebiT, qurdebiTa da TavdasxmebiT gamowveuli SiSi. me marto Cavdiodi
dabla da kontoris an samzareulos fanjridan gareT viyurebodi. bevrs uyvars
buneba, bevrs Ria cis qveS sZinavs, patimrebi da avadmyofebi cixeebsa da
saavadmyofoebSi, ocneboben im dReze, roca gareT gavlen, datkbebian bunebis
cqeriT, magram cota vinmea CvensaviT Caketili sakuTar mwuxarebasTan erTad,
ase mowyvetili da izolirebuli yovelive imisagan, rac erTnairad ekuTvnis
mdidrebsac da Raribebsac. ar gegonos es mxolod warmodgenaa, ara, me marTlac
mamSvidebs cis, Rrublebis mTvarisa da varskvlavebis cqera. es bromze da
valerianis wveTebze ukeT moqmedebs, buneba maswavlis morCilebas, maCvevs,
medgrad Sevegebo bedis ukuRmarTobas.
samwuxarod, mtvriani, fardebCamofarebuli WuWyiani fanjrebidan unda
vuyuro bunebas da isic mxolod gamonaklis SemTxvevaSi. xolo fanjrebidan
yureba araviTar siamovnebas ar maniWebs, radgan buneba erTaderTia da
namdvilad ver itans veraviTar surogatebs.
ana
paraskevi, 16 ivnisi, 1944
Zvirfaso kiwi!
axali problemebi wamoiWra! qalbatoni van daani sasowarkveTilia,
mxolod SublSi tyviis daxlaze, sapyrobileze, CamoxrCobasa da
TviTmkvlelobaze laparakobs. eWvianobs peterze, imis gamo, rom me ufro
mendoba, vidre mas. gamwyralia duselze, radgan mis keklucobas yuradRebas ar
aqcevs. eSinia, misma qmarma bewvis qurqSi aRebuli fuli mTlianad ar
gaflangos. Cxubobs, ilanZReba, tiris, wuwunebs, icinis, Semdeg ki isev Cxubobs.
aba, ras mouxerxeb aseT sulelsa da mtiralas? aravin ar aqcevs yuradRebas!
araviTari Tavmoyvareoba ar gaaCnia: yvelas Tavs abralebs, aqeT-iqiT darbis,
RmerTma icis, ra acvia. yvelaferze cudi isaa, rom amis gamo peteri uxeSi
xdeba, van daani Riziandeba, dedas ki yvela ezizReba. SesaniSnavi garemocvaa,
ara! amgvar SemTxvevaSi kargad unda gaxsovdes erTi ram: yvelaferze icine da
nuravis gauwev angariSs! marTalia, egoisturad JRers, magram esaa erTaderTi
gamosavali, im adamianisaTvis, vinc TviTon unda inugeSos Tavi.
kralers isev mouvida uwyeba, oTxi kvira unda amuSaon. cdilobs eqimis
mowmobiT da firmis weriliT Tavi gaiTavisuflos. koophoisma kuWis operacia
unda gaikeTos. guSin 11 saaTze yvela kerZo telefoni gamorTes.
ana

paraskevi, 23 ivnisi, 1944

Zvirfaso kiwi!
gansakuTrebuli araferi momxdara, ingliselebi Serburgs uteven. pimisa
da van daanis azriT, 10 oqtombers ukve Tavisuflebi viqnebiT! am operaciaSi
rusebic monawileoben. guSin vitebskis mimarTulebiT daiwyes Seteva. sami wlis
win swored am dRes germanelebi Tavs daesxnen am qalaqs.
kartofili TiTqmis aRar dagvrCa, vapirebT, gadavTvaloT da yvelas
Tavisi wili davurigoT. yvelam ise gaitanos Tavi, rogorc SeuZlia.
ana
samSabaTi, 27 ivnisi, 1944
Zvirfaso kiwi!
ganwyobileba didebulia, yvelaferi SesaniSnavad midis. dRes Serburgi,
vitebski da Jlobini aiRes, tyve da nadavli bevria. SerburgTan xuTi germaneli
generali mokles, ori ki tyved Caigdes. axla ingliselebs navsadguri aqvT da
yvelaferi SeuZliaT gadazidon xmeleTze, rac ki sWirdebaT. erTi kviris
ganmavlobaSi naxevarkunZuli kotanteni mTlianad ingliselebis xelSi gadavida
didi gamarjvebaa! jarebis gadmosxmis Semdeg, am sami kviris ganmavlobaSi,
rogorc aq, iseve safrangeTSi yoveldRe wvimda da qariSxali boboqrobda,
magram cudma amindma ver daabrkola ingliselebi da amerikelebi gaeSalaT
TavianTi Zalebi da mere rogor! marTalia WUWA-s, (Wunderwaffe)1, (1 ase
uwodeben mfrinav yumbaras (germ.).) germanelTa am saswaulebriv iaraRs, yvelgan
iyeneben, magram aseT raketebs axla inglisisTvis mxolod umniSvnelo ziani
moaqvs, `mofebis~ gazeTebisTvis ki Tavsayreli masala. jer sad arian, ufro
metad aukankaldebaT muxlebi, roca TavianTi `mofriki~ SeatyobinebT, rom
`bolSevikuri safrTxe~ marTlac axloa.
yvela germaneli qali da bavSvi, vinc TavdacviT samuSaoebze ar
gamodgeba, sanapiro raionebidan gahyavT groningenSi, frislandiasa da
gerdellandiaSi. musertma2 (2 holandiis nacionalur-socialisturi moZraobis
xelmZRvaneli.) ganacxada: Tu aqac SemoiWrnen, samxedro formas Cavicvamo.
aqamdec SeeZlo wasuliyo ruseTis frontze! fineTma Tavis droze uari Tqva
SeTavazebul zavze da molaparakeba axlac CaiSala. ra sulelebi arian, mere
inaneben!
rogor fiqrob, ras mogvitans 27 ivlisi?
ana
paraskevi, 30 ivnisi, 1944
Zvirfaso kiwi!
amindi cudia, anu: bad weather at a stretch to the 30-th of Juno3. (3 30 ivnisamde cudi
amindia (ingl.).) sworia ara? o, me ukve sakmaod kargad vici inglisuri.
magaliTad, vkiTxulob `An udeal Husbend~4 (4 `idealuri qmari~) (leqsikonis
daxmarebiT). saomari operaciebi brwyinvaled mimdinareobs! aiRes bobruiski,
mogilevi, orSa, uamravi tyve Caigdes xelT. CvenTan yvelaferi ol rait,
ganwyobilebac ki. Cveni hiperoptimistebi zeimoben. eli Tmas sxvanairad
ivarcxnis, mipma erTi kviris Svebuleba aiRo. axali sxva araferia.
ana
xuTSabaTi, 6 ivlisi, 1944
Zvirfaso kiwi!
guli mikvdeba, roca peteri ambobs, rodisme an borotmoqmedi gavxdebi,
anda spekulantio. marTalia, amas xumrobiT ambobs, magram iseTi grZnoba maqvs,
rom mas TviTon eSinia sakuTari unebisyofobis. waramara mesmis xan margosagan,
xan ki peterisagan: `me rom iseTi Zlieri da gabeduli viyo, rogorc Sen, me rom
iseTive daJinebiT SemeZlos gavitano Cemi, rogorc Sen, me rom SensaviT amtani
viyo, eh, maSin...!~.

nuTu marTla sanaqebo Tvisebaa rom sxvisi gavlenis qveS ar veqcevi? gana
sworia, rom mxolod Cemi sindisis karnaxs vemorCilebi? marTali giTxra, verc
ki warmomidgenia, rogor SeiZleba kacma Tqvas: `me susti var~ da mainc susti
darCes. ki magram, Tu kacma icis, rom sustia, ratom ar ebrZvis sisustes, ratom
ar cdilobs nebisyofa gamoiwrTos? peterma mipasuxa: `ase bevrad ufro
advilia~. amgvarma pasuxma, cota ar iyos, damanaRvliana. advili! gana uqnaroba,
mudam sakuTari Tavis motyueba, advilia? o, ara, ar SeiZleba ase iyos, marTali
araa, ar SeiZleba, rom sizarmacem da... fulma ase swrafad garyvnas adamiani.
me didxans vfiqrobdi, ra pasuxi gameca, rogor STamenerga peterisaTvis
sakuTari Tavisadmi rwmena da, rac mTavaria, gamomesworebina. ar vici, SevZleb
Tu ara amas.
xSirad miocnebia, ra kargi iqneboda vinme rom bolomde gulaxdili
yofiliyo CemTan, magram mxolod axla mivxvdi, ra Znelia bolomde Cawvde
vinmes da amave dros rame urCio, miT umetes, roca cnebebi `fuli~ da `advili~
CemTvis sruliad ucxo da axalia. peteri ukve cdilobs me dameyrdnos, magram
es araviTar SemTxvevaSi ar unda moxdes. iseT adamianebs, rogoric peteria,
sakuTar fexebze dgoma uWirT, xolo Tu Segnebulad cxovroben, kidev ufro
uZneldebaT gzis gakvleva auracxel problemebs Soris. me axla ratomRac erT
adgilas vtrialeb. guliT ki minda Cavwvde am sazizRari cnebis Sinaarss
`advilia~. rogor gavagebino peters, rom rac axla advili da mSvenieri Cans,
mas iseT ufskrulSi CaiTrevs, sadac arc megobrebia, arc silamaze, arc
sayrdeni da saidanac verasodes veRar amoxval.
Cven yvelani vcxovrobT am qveyanaze, magram ar viciT, ratom da risTvis.
vcxovrobT im mizniT, rom bednierni viyoT, vcxovrobT sxvadasxvanairad da
mainc erTnairad. Cven samni karg pirobebSi gavizardeT, SegviZlia viswavloT,
mivaRwieT raRacas, samives gvaqvs safuZveli, ukeTesi cxovrebis imedi viqonioT,
magram... amis ufleba Cven TviTonve unda movipovoT; es ki arc ise advili da
ioli mosaxerxebelia. bednierebis mosapoveblad Sroma da sikeTisaken swrafvaa
saWiro da ara spekulantoba da sizarmace. es SeiZleba sasiamovno geCvenebodes,
magram kmayofilebas mxolod Sroma ganiWebs.
me ar mesmis im xalxis, romelTac Sroma ar uyvarT, magram peteri arc
aseTia. mas ubralod garkveuli mizani ara aqvs. Tavs sulel adamianad,
araraobad Tvlis da ar hgonia, rom rames miaRwevs. sabralo biWi, misTvis
ucnobia is sixaruli, rasac sxvisi gabedniereba iwvevs, magram me amas ver
vaswavli. mas araferi swams. RimiliT laparakobs qristeze, gmobs RmerTs.
marTalia, didi orTodoqsi arc me var, magram guli mtkiva, roca vxedav, ra
martosuli, urwmuno da Ratakia.
adamianebs, romelTac religia aqvT, unda uxarodeT, radgan yvelas rodi
aqvs unari iwamos zebunebrivi Zala. adamians ar unda aSinebdes sikvdilis
Semdeg sasjeli. salxinebeli, samoTxe da jojoxeTi iseTi cnebebia, romelTa
arsebobaSi bevrs epareba eWvi, magram miuxedavad amisa, esa Tu is religia, sul
erTia romeli, WeSmariti gzidan acdenis saSualebas ar aZlevs adamians.
umTavresi aq RvTis winaSe SiSi ki araa, aramed is, rom ar dasce sakuTari
Rirseba da sindisi. ra kargi iqneboda, yvela adamiani dawolis win
gaixsenebdes, rac mTeli dRis ganmavlobaSi moimoqmeda da awon-dawonides, ra
iyo kargi da ra cudi!
Tavisda uneburad ecdebodnen dRiTi dRe ukeTesni gamxdariyvnen. am
saSualebis gamoyeneba yvelas SeuZlia, radgan araferi Rirs da yvelasaTvis
xelmisawvdomia. xolo vinc ar icis, unda icodes, rom `sufTa sindisi adamians
Zalas matebs!~
ana
SabaTi, 8 ivlisi, 1944
Zvirfaso kiwi!
firmis mTavari warmomadgeneli, batoni b. bevervikSi iyo da xendro
iSova. Camoitana daaxloebiT ocdaoTxi yuTi rogorc CvenTvis, aseve mTeli

kontorisaTvis, xendro sul dasvrili iyo da qviSiT avsebuli. Cven maSinve

davakonserveT rva qila da Svidi qila jemi movxarSeT. mipi xval mTeli
kontorisaTvis jems moxarSavs.
pirvelis naxevarze saxlSi ucxo aRaravin iyo: quCis kari daketes da
yuTebi amoitanes. peteri, mama da van daani kibeze daaboteben. anes moaqvs Tbili
wyali titanidan, margo vedroebs moaTrevs, erTi sityviT, yvela saqmianobs.
roca dabla, kontoris samzareuloSi Cavedi, mucelSi TiTqos raRaca Camwyda.
mipi, eli, koophoisi, henki, mama, peteri erTi sityviT, yvelas aq moeyara Tavi,
ltolvilebsac da maT mfarvelebsac, da isic dRisiT-mzisiT.
quCidan veravin dagvinaxavda, radgan fanjrebze fardebia Camofarebuli,
magram roca xmamaRali laparaki da karebis jaxuni mesmoda, vkankalebdi. nuTu
isev vimalebiT, vkiTxe Cems Tavs. albaT, aseTi grZnoba aqvs adamians, roca
kvlav dRis sinaTleze gamodis. qvabi gaivso, aba Cqara, zeviT, ojaxis danarCeni
wevrebi Cvens samzareuloSi idgnen magidasTan da xendros recxavdnen. ufro
mets pirSi iyridnen, vidre vedroSi. dagvWirda kidev erTi vedro da peteri isev
qveda samzareuloSi Cavida. uecrad viRacam orjer dareka. peterma vedro dabla
dadga. da mbrunavi karis dasaxurad zeviT amovarda. mouTmenlad vcqmutavdiT
adgilze, radgan naxevrad garecxili xendro banaobas eloda, Cven ki onkani
davketeT; mudam mtkiced vicavT Sinaganawess: `Tu saxlSi ucxo piria, onkani
dakete, wylis xmauri saxifaToa~. pirvel saaTze movida henki da gviTxra,
fostalionma darekao. peteri imwamsve Cavarda qveviT. wkrr, dareka zarma.
marjvnisaken, zurgisaken! me jer mbrunav karTan gavCerdi, vinme xom ar modismeTqi, mere ki Cumad avedi zeviT. bolos me da peteri qurdebiviT gavisuseT
moajirTan da yurs vugdebdiT xmaurs, romelic qvevidan modioda. araviTari
ucxo xma. peteri Cumad Cadis kibeze, da naxevar gzaze gaCerebuli iZaxis: `eli~!
pasuxi ar ismis. kidev erTxel: `eli~! magram samzareuloSi iseTi xmauria, rom
peteris xma ikargeba. bolos igi samzareuloSi Cadis, me ki daZabuli vdgavar
kibeze da qveviT vicqirebi.
`peter, aba Cqara adi zeviT, revizori movida~, mesmis koophoisis xma.
peteri oxvriT emorCileba. mbrunavi kari iketeba. oris naxevarze CvenTan amodis
kraleri. o, RmerTo Cemo, yvelgan xendroa. sauzmeze xendro, henki Wams xendros,
koophoisi pirs itkbarunebs xendroTi, mipi xarSavs xendros, yvelgan xendros
sunia. aRar SemiZlia xendros danaxva. avdivar zeviT, magram o, RmerTo, aqac
xendros recxaven.
xendros narCenebs akonserveben. saRamos ori qila ukve agviduRda. mama
saswrafod xarSavs marmelads. meore diliT kidev ori qila, dRisiT
oTxi. damnaSavea van daani, radgan qilebs sterilizacia aklia. mama yovel
saRamos xarSavs marmelads. vWamT xendroian fafas, dos, purs, desertze
xendro, xendro SaqriT, Saqris fxvniliT. ori dRis ganmavlobaSi yvelgan
TvalSi mxvdeboda xendro, xendro, xendro... bolos maragi amoiwura, magram
cxra qila kidev dgas cxraklitulSi.
gesmis, ane, miyviris margo, memwvanilem, romelic aqve kuTxeSi
vaWrobs, 19 girvanqa cercvi gamogvigzavna! ra kargi kaci yofila, vTqvi me.
es marTlac kargia, magram muSaoba... oh!
SabaTs dilidanve cercvis garCevaSi momexmarebiT, ganacxada dedam
sadilze. da marTlac, am dilis sauzmis Semdeg, magidaze cercviT savse
mominanqrebuli didi Tasi gaCnda. cercvis garCeva Zalze mosawyenia, magram aba
gausinje gemo cercvis Wots. bevrma ar icis, ra gemrielia Woti, gansakuTrebiT
roca Txel kans Semoacli. aqvs kidev erTi didi upiratesoba, SegiZlia cercvze
samjer meti SeWamo. magram `kanis Semocla~ Zalze mosawyeni da sakirkito
samuSaoa. SeiZleba iseTi pedantebisaTvis, rogoric kbilis eqimebi da kontoris
wvrilfexa muSakebi arian, amgvari samuSao Sesaferisia, magram CemisTana
mozardi, daudegari gogonasaTvis namdvili wamebaa. daviwyeT aTis naxevarze,
TerTmetis naxevarze Sevisvene. erTi saaTis Semdeg ki kvlav Sevudeqi muSaobas.
sxva rom araferi, yurebi miwivis: yunwi motexe, kani fxianad gaaZre, garCeuli

cercvi TasSi Caagde da ase Semdeg! Tvalebi amiWrelda, yvelgan mwvane, mwvane
Wotebi, kanebi, dampali cercvi, yvelaferi mwvanea.
gamovSterdi, magram raRaca rom vakeTo, mTeli dRe yovelgvar sisuleles
vroSav, yvelas vacineb da amave dros iseTi grZnoba maqvs, TiTqos mowyeniloba
bolos momiRebs. yovelTvis rogorc ki cercvis kanis gaZrobas viwyeb, sul
ufro vrwmundebi, rom arasodes, arasodes viqnebi marto diasaxlisi!
bolos 11 saaTze vsauzmobT, magram pirvelis naxevridan oris TxuTmet
wuTamde muSaoba unda ganvagrZoT. axla ukve guli mereva, TiTqos zRvam mawyina,
da ara marto me, yvelas. mZinavs oTxamde, magram Zilis Semdegac ver movsulvar
gons am sazizRari cercvisagan.
ana
SabaTi, 15 ivlisi, 1944
Zvirfaso kiwi!
xelSi Cagvivarda biblioTekis wigni cnobismoyvareobis aRmZvreli
saTauriT: `ras fiqrobT Tanamedrove axalgazrda qaliSvilebze?~ minda dRes am
Temaze gesaubro. wignis avtori qalia. `Cveni drois axalgazrdobas~ Tavidan
fexebamde akritikebs, magram mTlianad ar uaryofs da arc im daskvnamde midis,
rom `arafris maqnisni arian~. piriqiT, igi im azrisaa, rom Tu axalgazrdoba
moindomebs, SeuZlia axali, didi da mSvenieri samyaro Seqmnas. mas saamisod
yvela monacemi aqvs, magram zerele ambebiTaa garTuli da cxovrebis WeSmarit
silamazes yuradRebas ar aqcevs. me mgonia, calkeuli adgilebi piradad me
mexeba. da amitom vecdebi bolomde gadagiSalo Cemi Sinagani samyaro da davicva
Tavi amgvari sayvedurebisagan.
Cemi xasiaTis erT-erTi ZiriTadi Tviseba, rasac yvela Cemi nacnobi amCnevs
TviTkritikaa. Cems saqciels gverdidan vuyureb, TiTqos Cem win ucxo
adamiani dgas. yovelgvari mikerZoebis, yovelgvari mogonili Tavis marTlebis
gareSe vdgavar am meore anes pirispir da vakvirdebi, kargad iqceva Tu cudad.
TviTdakvirveba arasdros ar mwyindeba da sakmarisia raime vTqva, rom imwamsve
vfiqrob: `ara, ase ar unda yofiliyo~, anda `ase jobia, ase ufro sworia!~
xSirad me Cems Tavs bevr rameSi vamtyuneb da ufro da ufro vrwmundebi, ra
marTalia mama, rodesac ambobs: `yovelma bavSvma TviTon unda aRzardos
sakuTari Tavi~. sxvebs SeuZliaT mxolod rCeva an miTiTeba miscen, magram
Tavisi xasiaTi adamianma TviTon, sakuTari xeliT unda Camoayalibos. amave
dros me vgrZnob, rom bevri energia maqvs, Zlieri, Tavisufali, axalgazrda var
da ase mgonia, yvelafris gakeTeba SemiZlia. roca yovelive es pirvelad
vigrZeni, gamexarda, da ara mgonia, bedis ukuRmarTobam, romelic yvelam unda
gamoscados, advilad gamtexos, Tumca amaze adrec bevri milaparakia SenTan.
axla vayeneb mTavar Teziss: `dedas da mamas Cemi ar esmiT~. mSoblebi Zalian
manebivrebdnen, kargad mepyrobodnen, micavdnen, erTi sityviT, akeTebdnen
yvelafers, risi gakeTebac SeeZloT. miuxedavad amisa, didxans vgrZnobdi
saSinel martoobas. vfiqrobdi, yvelam mimatova, Cemi aravis esmis. mama
yovelnairad cdilobda daewynarebina Cemi mborgavi suli, magram unayofod.
bolos me TviTon ganvkurne sakuTar Tavi imiT, rom Cemi saqcielisa da
zraxvebis sapirispiro mxare davinaxe. rogor moxda, rom mamam veraviTari
Semweoba ver aRmomiCina brZolaSi? ratom aRmoCnda uZluri dasaxmareblad
gamowvdili xeli? imitom, rom mamam swori gza ver monaxa, mudam ise
melaparakeboda, rogorc bavSvs, romelsac mxolod Tavisi bavSvuri dardi
awuxebs. es sityvebi ucnaurad JRers, radgan swored mama iyo yvelaze
gulaxdili CemTan, swored man Caminerga rwmena, rom me sakmaod bevri mesmis,
magram erTi ram mas mainc gamorCa mxedvelobidan: ar ufiqria imaze, rom CemTvis
yvelaze mniSvnelovani Cemi brZolaa, brZola imisaTvis, rom zedapirze
amovtivtivebuliyavi. ar SemeZlo aseTi gamoTqmebis gagoneba: `tipuri
movlenebi... sxva gogoebi... cxadia, gaivlis~... da ase Semdeg. ar mindoda
mompyrobodnen ise, rogorc yvela sxva gogos. msurda ane, pirovneba,
vyofiliyavi. pims es ar esmoda. saerTod ki me ver vendobi iseT adamians,

romelic Tavis Tavze cotas miyveba; da radganac me pimis Sesaxeb TiTqmis

araferi vici, amitom Cvens Soris namdvili siaxlove ar SeiZleba iyos. pimi
cxovrebas ufrosi adamianis TvalsazrisiT uyurebs, Tumca Tavis droze masac
eqneboda aseTi warmavali gatacebebi. da miuxedavad imisa, rom bevrs cdilobs,
mainc ar SeuZlia ise uTanagrZnos umcross, rogorc ufrosma amxanagma, masTan
erTad ganicados yvelaferi. amitom Cems Sexedulebebs, bolomde gaazrebul
Teoriebs me mxolod Cems dRiurs da zogjer margos vuziareb. mamas yvelafers
vumalavdi,
yvelafers, rac ki mawuxebda. arasodes ar gamiziarebia
misTvis Cemi idealebi, Segnebulad CamovSordi, sxvagvarad ar SemeZlo. me
moviqeci ise, rogorc grZnobam mikarnaxa, moviqeci ise, rogorc Cemi sulieri
simSvidisaTvis iyo saWiro. me rom vinmesTvis neba mimeca gaekritikebina es
naxevrad daumTavrebeli muSaoba sakuTar Tavze, kvlav davkargavdi simSvides
da Cemdami rwmenas, rac didi gaWirvebiT movipove. ra mkacradac unda JRerdes
es sityvebi, me amaze pimis gulisTvisac ki ver waval, radgan pimi araTu gavriye
Cemi Sinagani samyarodan, aramed Cemi TavSeukaveblobis gamo ufro da ufro
veTiSebi.
es sakiTxi yvelaze ufro mawuxebs: rogor moxda, ratom maRizianebs pimi
ase? ratom ar SemiZlia masTan mecadineoba, ratom meCveneba misi alersi
naZaladevad, ratom mirCevnia, momeSvas manamde, sanam sakuTari Tavisadmi meti
rwmena ar meqneba? me aqamde mRrRnis sircxvilis grZnoba im werilis gamo,
romelic gacecxlebulma davwere da gavugzavne. o, ra Znelia yvelgan da
yovelTvis Zlieri da mtkice iyo.
magram ufro didi gulacruebis mizezi sxvaa; mamaze metad peterze fiqri
mawuxebs. kargad vici, rom me vipove igi da ara man me; me Sevqmeni misgan
saocnebo xati, Cems warmodgenaSi igi wynari, sayvareli, mgrZnobiare ymawvili
iyo, romelsac alersi da megobari enatreboda. es me mqonda moTxovnileba
gadameSala guli cocxali adamianisaTvis, mWirdeboda megobari, romelic
grZel gzaze mxarSi amomidgeboda; da miuxedavad siZneleebisa, mainc mivaRwie
imas, rom peteri nel-nela, magram mTeli guliT momendo; xolo roca is
megobrulad ganvawye Cemdami, Cvens damokidebulebaSi TavisTavad Semoipara
intimi, rac axla gaugonar ambad meCveneba. Cven bevrs vlaparakobT
saidumloebiT mocul sakiTxebze, magram imaze, rac gulSi mqonda da axlac
maqvs, aqamde ar gvilaparakia. me jerac ar vici, rogoria peteri; iqneb
morcxvobis bralia, rom CemTanac zedmetad TavSekavebulia? magram erTi
Secdoma mainc davuSvi: me ar miveci mas saSualeba, sxvagvarad gamoexata Cemdami
megobroba da vcdilobdi, alersiTa da sinaziT dameaxlovebina. axla ki mas
siyvaruli swyuria da me vgrZnob, rom dRiTi dRe sul ufro da ufro metad
vuyvarvar. misTvis isic sakmarisia, rom Cems gverdiT iyos, me ki ar masvenebs
survili, kidev erTxel Cavwvde mis azrebs, Sevexo im sakiTxebs, romlebzedac
ase Zlier mwadia saubari. peters arc ki esmis, rom ZaliT daviaxlove da axla
orive xeliT mebRauWeba. jerjerobiT me veraviTar saSualebas ver vxedav, rom
mourideblad movwyvito Cems Tavs da sakuTar fexebze davayeno. me Zalian male
mivxvdi, rom peteri ver gaxdeba Cemi namdvili megobari, da vcdilobdi
naWuWidan mainc gamomeyvana; mindoda egrZno sakuTari axalgazrdoba:
`sinamdvileSi axalgazrda ufro martoa, vidre moxuci~. es fraza erT wignSi
amovikiTxe da, me mgonia, sworia.
rogor fiqrob, marTalia is ambavi, rom aq mozrdilebs ufro uWirT,
vidre mozardebs? ara, araa marTali! mozrdilebs yvelaferze aqvT Tavisi azri
da ician, rogor moiqcnen cxovrebaSi. Cven ki axalgazrdebs, gacilebiT gviWirs
davicvaT Cveni Sexedulebebi da isic iseT dros, roca yvela ideali ingreva da
nadgurdeba, roca adamianebi yvelaze binZur Tvisebebs amJRavneben, roca yvelas
eWvi epareba simarTleSi, samarTlianobaSi, RmerTis arsebobaSi!
da Tu vinme daiwyebs imis mtkicebas, TiTqos mozrdilebs ufro uWirT,
vidre Cven, mozardebs, etyoba, ar esmis, rogor gvawvalebs Cven uamravi
problema. SeiZleba Cven amgvari problemebisaTvis metismetad axalgazrdebi
varT, magram Tavs mogvaxvies da vcdilobT rogorme gadavwyvitoT, bolos

vpoulobT kidec pasuxs, magram faqtebTan dapirispirebas ver uZlebs, radgan

faqtebi sul sxvagvarad gamoiyureba. ai, ra aris yvelaze Zneli Cvens droSi:
Cven ar gagvaCnia idealebi, ocnebebi, naTeli imedebi da Tu gagviCnda, saSineli
sinamdvile maSinve anadgurebs.
saocari ambavia, rom me jer kidev ar damikargavs yovelgvari imedi, miT
umetes, rom mTeli Cemi imedebi uazro da ganuxorcielebeli meCveneba.
miuxedavad amisa, me maT mainc magrad vebRauWebi, radgan jer kidev mjera, rom
adamiani keTilia. me ar SemiZlia sikvdilze, ubedurebaze vifiqro da yvelaferi
amaze avago. vxedav, rogor iqceva samyaro TandaTan udabnod. sul ufro axlos
mesmis qariSxlis griali da Weqa-quxili, romelsac SeuZlia mogvspos, vgrZnob
milionobiT adamianis tanjvas da mainc, roca cas Sevyureb, vfiqrob, rom
yvelaferi ukeTesobisaken Semobrundeba, sisastikesa da daundoblobas bolo
moeReba da miwaze kvlav mSvidoba da siwynare daisadgurebs.
manam ki maRla unda vataro Cemi idealebi; iqneba momavalSi
ganxorcieldes kidec.
ana
paraskevi, 21 ivlisi, 1944
Zvirfaso kiwi!
isev gaiRviZa imedma, rogorc iqna, yvelaferi isev kargad midis! da mere
ra kargad! gaugonari cnobebi aRwevs Cvenamde! hitlers Tavs daesxnen, da ara
viRac komunisti ebraeli, aramed keTilSobili germanuli sisxlis generali,
grafi da Tanac axalgazrda! hitleri `RvTis gangebam~ gadaarCina da,
samwuxarod, didad samwuxarod, iolad gadarCa, mxolod ramdenime ganakawri da
umniSvnelo damwvroba aRmoaCnda. misi amalis ramdenime oficeri da generali
moklulia an daWrili. ai, imis damamtkicebeli sabuTi, rom bevr oficersa da
generals omi yelSi amouvida da siamovnebiT gagzavnidnen hitlers
mousavleTSi. misi mospobis Semdeg maT undaT daamyaron samxedro diqtatura,
mokavSireebTan zavi dadon, xelaxla SeiaraRdnen da oci wlis Semdeg kvlav
omi daiwyon. iqneb gangebam garkveuli mizniT daayovna hitleris sikvdili mcire
xniT, radgan mokavSireebisaTvis gacilebiT mosaxerxebeli da xelsayrelia, Tu
wminda sisxlis germanelebi erTmaneTs daerevian da mospoben; rusebsa da
ingliselebs naklebi samuSao darCebaT da ufro adre Seudgebian TavianTi
dangreuli qalaqebis aRdgenas, Tumca jer saqme aqamde ar misula. ar minda
winaswar ganvWvrito brwyinvale momavali, magram Sen, albaT, gesmis, rom
yvelafers, razedac me vlaparakob safuZvlad udevs TvalsaCino faqtebi, raRac
iseTi, rac orive fexiT realur niadagze dgas. gamonaklisis saxiT aq
aRarafers vlaparakob maRal idealebze.
garda amisa, hitlerma Tavazianoba gamoiCina da Tavis erTgul da
sayvarel xalxs ganucxada: amieridan yvela samxedro piri gestapos emorCileba
da yovel jariskacs ufleba eZleva dauyovnebliv daxvritos Tavisi meTauri,
Tuki monawileobda am binZur da mdabal TavdasxmaSio.
icocxle, datrialdeba ambebi! hans dampfs sirbilisagan fexebi stkiva,
meTaurma uyvira. hansi SaSxanas iRebs da yviris: `Sen fiureris mokvla gindoda,
xom, ai, risi Rirsi xar!~ SaSxana gavarda da qedmaRali meTauri, romelmac
gabeda da sabralo jariskacs uyvira, maradiuli sicocxlis samyaroSi
gadasaxlda (iqneb, rogorc amboben, maradiuli sikvdilis saufloSi). saqme
albaT iqamdec miva, rom batoni oficrebi SiSisagan Caisvrian da jariskacebs
veRarafers gaubedaven.
yvelaferi gasagebia. Tu isev abda-ubdas gwer? ras izam, roca vfiqrob,
oqtomberSi isev skolaSi vivli, imdenad bednieri var, rom dalagebulad azris
gamoTqma ar SemiZlia. o, la, la, es wuTia vwerdi, ar minda winaswar ganvWvrito
momavali-meTqi. nu gamijavrdebi, tyuilad xom ar meZaxian `winaaRmdegobaTa
kvanZs~.
ana

samSabaTi, 1 agvisto 1944

Zvirfaso kiwi!
`winaaRmdegobaTa kvanZi~. es iyo Cemi ukanaskneli werilis ukanaskneli
sityvebi da dRevandelsac am sityvebiT viwyeb. `winaaRmdegobaTa kvanZi!~
SegiZlia amixsna, ras niSnavs es gamoTqma? ras niSnavs winaaRmdegoba? am
sityvasac iseve, rogorc sxva mravals, ori mniSvneloba aqvs. winaaRmdegoba
meore samyaros mimarT da Sinagani winaaRmdegoba.
pirveli, Cveulebriv, imas niSnavs, rom `ar eTanxmeba sxva adamianis azrs,
ggonia, yvelaferi sxvaze ukeT ici, cdilob ukanaskneli sityva Sen dagrCes!~
erTi sityviT, yvela im usiamo Tvisebas, romelTac me maweren. meores ki aravin
icnobs, meore Cemi piradi saidumloebaa.
erTxel ukve giambe, rom sinamdvileSi erTi suli ki ara maqvs, aramed
ori. erTSi moqceulia Cemi aulagmavi mxiaruleba, ironia, sicocxlisadmi
trfiali da, rac mTavaria, yvelafrisadmi zerele damokidebuleba. igulisxmeba:
ar veridebi arSiyobas, xvevnas, kocnas, orazrovan xumrobas. da es suli mudam
mzadaa Seaviwroos meore, ufro wminda, Rrma, mSvenieri. magram anas am meore
karg mxares aravin icnobs da amitomac xSirad ver mitanen.
marTalia, zogjer erTi saRamosTvis mxiaruli da gamrTobi takimasxara
var, magram Semdeg mTeli Tvis manZilze aRaravis vWirdebi; maSasadame, igive
var, rac seriozuli xalxisaTvis samijnuro filmia: mxolod gamrTobi, mcire
xniT TavSesaqcevi, rasac male iviwyeben xolme.
SeiZleba es cudi araa, magram arc maincdamainc kargia. amis moyola,
cxadia, ar msiamovnebs, magram ratom ar unda giTxra, roca marTalia? Cemi
Tavqariani, zerele suli yovelTvis jabnis meores, ukeTess, da yovelTvis
amarcxebs. Sen ver warmoidgen, ramdenjer micdia, damesustebina, mimeCqmala es
ana, romelic bolos da bolos naxevaria imisa, rasac ana hqvia, magram amaod da
vici ratom.
imitom, rom meSinia, vai, Tu Cemma nacnobebma, romelTac ician, rogori
var, uecrad Cemi meore, gacilebiT ukeTesi da keTili buneba aRmoaCinon.
meSinia, rom damcineben, sulelad da santimentalur adamianad CamTvlian,
seriozulad ar momeqcevian. Tumca me miveCvie araseriozul damokidebulebas,
magram amas mieCvia mxolod `zerele~ ane, mas SeuZlia amis atana, xolo meore,
`seriozuli~, amisTvis metismetad sustia. da marTlac, roca kargi ana
TxuTmeti wuTiT mainc gamomiTrevia scenaze, ise SekumSula, rogorc mcenare
`ukadrisa~, xolo sadac laparakia saWiro, pirvel nomer anas uTmobs adgils,
da sanam gamoverkveode, uCinardeba.
ase rom, pirveli ana arasdros ar eCveneba xalxs, magram, roca marto var,
mTavar rols aspulebs. me zustad vici, rogori var da rogori minda viyo...
sulis siRrmeSi. magram, samwuxarod, me mxolod CemTvis var aseTi da albaT
amitom vTvli Cems Tavs Rrma, gulCaTxrobil adamianad, maSin rodesac sxvebs
zerele da gulRia arsebad mivaCnivar. Signidan yovelTvis gzas minaTebs wminda
ana, garegnulad ki mxiaruli da xtunia Tikani var.
rogorc geubnebodi, yvelafers sul sxvanairad vgrZnob, vidre gamovTqvam,
amitomac Seiqmna Cemze iseTi Sexeduleba, TiTqos biWebs davdev, varSiyob,
yvelaferSi cxvirs vyof, TavauReblad vkiTxulob romanebs. mxiaruli ane amis
gamo icinis, ukmex pasuxebs iZleva, gulgrilad iCeCavs mxrebs. ise iqceva,
TiTqos mas yvelaferi fexebze hkidia, magram vai, rom meore ana sul sxvanairad
uyurebs amas. da radgan SenTan bolomde gulaxdili var, gamogitydebi, rom
Zalian mawuxebs es ambavi: vcdilob Sevicvalo, ukeTesi gavxde, magram
yovelTvis vebrZvi raRac iseTs, rac Cemze Zlieria.
SigniT ki yvelaferi mosTqvams: xedavs, ras miaRwie? yvelasTan gaifuWe
saxeli, irgvliv mxolod gesliani an SezRuduli xalxia, aravis ar moswonxar
da yvelaferi es mxolod imis bralia, rom yurs ar ugdeb kargi anas rCevas. ah,
me siamovnebiT davujerebdi, magram ar gamomdis: roca seriozuli da wynari
var, yvela fiqrobs, Tavs vikatuneb da mxolod xumrobiT gamovdivar am
uxerxuli mdgomareobidan. ojaxis wevrebze aRarafers vambob, radgan yoveli

maTgani fiqrobs, rom avad gavxdi, maCeCeben Tavis tkivilis wamals, nervebis
dasawynarebel abebs, Sublsa da majas misinjaven. iqneb sicxe gaqvs, iqneb kuWi
ar moqmedebs, mesmis yoveli mxridan, Semdeg ki imis gamo mlanZRaven, rom cud
gunebaze var. amdenis atana aRar SemiZlia. roca ase Camacivdebian, jer
namdvilad vWirveulob, Semdeg sevda mipyrobs da bolos isev Semovabruneb
guls cudi mxridan gareT, kargidan ki SigniT. da vcdilob movnaxo saSualeba,
romelic damexmareba gavxde iseTi, rogoric minda viyo da rogoric SeiZleba
vyofiliyavi kidec!.. qveyanaze rom sxva adamianebi ar arsebobdnen.
ana
aq wydeba anas dRiuri.
bolosityvaoba
4 agvistos `mwvane policiam~ TavSesafari aRmoaCina. daapatimres yvela
ltolvili, maTTan erTad kraleri da koophoisic. dapatimrebulebi germaniisa
da holandiis sakoncentracio banakebSi gagzavnes.
gestapom daarbia `TavSesafari~. uwesrigod dayril Zvel wignebsa da
Jurnalebs Soris mipma da elim anas dRiuri ipoves, ramdenime gverdis
gamoklebiT, rac mkiTxvelisaTvis interess moklebulia, dRiuri mTlianad
daibeWda.
`iatakqveSelTagan~ mxolod anas mama gadarCa. kralerma da koophoisma
holandiis sakoncentracio banakSi bevri tanjva gamoiares da TavianT ojaxebs
daubrundnen.
ana gardaicvala 1945 wlis martSi, bergen-belzenis sakoncentracio
banakSi, holandiis ganTavisuflebamde ori TviT adre.
mTargmnelis minaweri
gamoxda xani, oto franki meored daqorwinda, SveicariaSi dasaxlda da
bazelSi gardaicvala, mTargmnels wilad xvda pativi masTan da ane frankis
muzeumTan amsterdamSi mimowera hqonoda.
erT-erT werilSi batoni franki mwerda, anas dRiuris TargmniT Cveni
ojaxis bedi gaiziareTo. es marTlac asea.
n. a.