Onderdonkey

*CEE*

Alternating Current
Boulder, Colorado
Onderdonkey
CEE
2013, 2017 Alternating Current Press

All poems and prose in Onderdonkey are the property of CEE and may not be used or reprinted in any
manner without express permission from the author or publisher, except for the quotation of short passages
used inside of an article, criticism, or review. All rights reserved. Printed in the United States of America. All
non-public domain material in Onderdonkey is printed with permission.

Cover, back cover, and all interior photographs by CEE. Model: Jessica Marie Barnes. Photographs property of
and 2013, 2017 CEE. Used with permission. All rights reserved. All other graphics in the public domain.

Alternating Current Press

Boulder, Colorado
alternatingcurrentarts.com

ISBN-10: 0615784488
ISBN-13: 978-0615784489
First Edition: March 2013
Second Printing: March 2017
Dedicated to my dear friend and aide of many years,
Ms. Carmen Sandiego
(Shes sitting with me here, right now, by the way
but youll never find her )
Advanced Praise for * Onderdonkey*
, The prose and poetry of CEE is studded with nails, knives, teeth, and claws. In his latest,
Onderdonkey, the poetry juxtaposes scenes from the Alamo with scenes from more modern
times, while politicians bleat and war machines clank in the background. As always, CEEs
overriding plea is for humans to step forward and to think as individuals in what appears to be an
endless struggle against the grinding gears of the faceless, ubiquitous, sociopolitical machine.
John Berbrich, Editor of Dwarf Planet and Barbaric Yawp, Publisher at BoneWorld
Publishing and MuscleHead Press, and author of The Big Whole Thing and Mullet.

( The pieces in Onderdonkey are full of deep-lived societal insight from Mexico City to
the digital landscape behind the screen youre looking at. CEEs poems love the dead with
sidelong humor, just as all the best writers must learn to, in our multiple death-defying time.
Zack Kopp, Editor-in-Chief of Doggerel and author of Sorehead and Fire Diner.

*! Onderdonkey is a Texas- (or should we say Tejas-) sized boot up your ass, an
unblinking look at the world we live in and the world we humans have lived through. This is not
a mirror held up to society to show our flaws, but a big damn magnifying glass held up to the sun
in a desperate attempt to burn those imperfections away. This book may be the definition of no
holds barred.
Jeff Fleming, Former Editor of nibble, Cranial Tempest, and CannedPhlegm
and author of The Bones of Saints Under Glass and Shades of Green.
Table of * Contents*
Level One * 13
The Chapel (a prayer you owe the meanie) * 15
The Metaphor of the Death of Tory Lynn Darke * 17
You Remember How This Ends * 18
If Dawns the Zombpocalypse * 19
RAM 4 (Just When You Thought It Was Safe To Turn The Page ) * 21
X-CROCKETT * 22
William Barret Question Mark * 23
Richard Widmark Lives (the Sandbar Fight) * 25
Silent Enough For Heroes (SSSHHH!!! Youll Wake Them!) * 26
You Took My Job * 27
Internecine Warfare * 29
Santa Anna upon the Mount of Olives * 30
ATARI Longing * 31
Mirror Ball Over the Long Barracks * 33
El Grande Burro on Toast (Merry Christmas, again) * 34
With Apologies to Rose Bonne (The Halls of Ives) * 35
No Polynomials, Not Allowed * 37
Yes Keep Killing Me! Keep Killing Me! * 38
Samuel Colt places a call (3/6/1836) * 39
Hieronymus Crockett * 41
In That Fe-cal Rain! * 42
Coleto Creek Unquiet * 43
The Bower of Power * 45
Presentism is for people who cant face drugs (Surrender Tree) * 46
The Revival of Polk * 47
Take It! Take It! (bitch) * 49
(not to mention Marco Polo hadnt even been born) * 50
Countering the Counter-Offer * 51
from the Gospel according to the rich young ruler (Coptic papyri fragment) * 53
Wocka-Wocka Cowardice (Campus Arcade 1/81) * 54
Final Boss * 55

End quote * 57
Commemorative Texas Celebration stamps * 16, 24, 28, 32, 36, 40, 44, 48, 52
Carreras Old Staffordshire Figures cigarette card illustration * 20
Carmen Sandiego photograph montage * 1, 58
Author Biography * 69
Other CEE books from Alternating Current * 69
Colophon * 71
Acknowledgments * 71
Other Works from Alternating Current * 72
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William Barret Question Mark

Am I a pseudo-British, condescending asshole
Who could kick champion ass in World Fencing?
Do I strut and sneer and bite out my bitterness
How USELESS!!, Sennor Segguin !
Do I, indeed, think my shit dont stink?
Am I a pale, should-have-played-for-Marilyn-Manson, pseudo-Goth
Whos swallowed up by ees mini-Mad Hatter hat?
Do I mumble and murmur and give the impression
That I not only dont think my shit dont stink,
I dont even think I could get it up?

I think Im neither
I think Im a man you never knew, nor ever, ever will
Who never saw the bullet coming
Even though Id seen it clear, there, in the air
Hovering, for thirteen days

!!!23
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Mirror Ball Over the Long Barracks

Whatever you may have heard
What banner whichever they display, proud, bold,
What wed like to say, Yes! Exact of formula!
Theres one thing I do hafta burst for youse Tooth Fairies, namely
The Only flag to fly above El Alamo during the siege
Was the regimental standard of the New Orleans Greys
Powder blue as my Junior Prom
Period eagle upon it, would give you mares of Martin Van Buren
Fringes
Oh, it was beautiful;
You who laugh at nation-states, laugh now
The banner, the one and only (terribly specific) Alamo flag
Is Granny quilt scraps wadded in wax paper
In some highly official uncooled Mexico City basement,
And in a related story,
I still have the pro photo I bought, taken at my Junior Prom
God, we were beautiful

!!!33
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El Grande Burro on Toast (Merry Christmas, again)

I, said the donkey, shaggy and brown
I got clipped by six bullets before the North Wall ever caved
Clipped more by shrapnel of adobe walls
Stinging of bayonets as soldados rushed on past me
A man named Bowman, from Tennessee,
Slammed headfirst my ribs, as he died
A soldado, choking on his own blood
Yanked my tail hard, tearing at it, trying to stand
Men fell against me more, and bullets and knives did cut

Blanketed, watered, fed, all claret yet upon me, dried

I carried Susannah Dickinson Da Fuck Outta There
I, said the donkey, shaggy and brown

!!!34
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With Apologies to Rose Bonne (The Halls of Ives)

There were more damned beings at The Alamo, there
If you read works of fiction
Which, fiction should truly be said, fictational
Everyone with a story is a reporter, it seems
Every story about the battle
Until the battle
Is dictated, terbacky-chaw
Pull ye up a pickle barrel, pard, come learn about
The cat that was there
And the dog that was there
And the girl that was there
And the boy that was there
The 1836 populace of Poughkeepsie, it seems, all there
Wall to wall families with a mouse and a cat and a dog and a horse
The defenders died, of course

!!!35
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Coleto Creek Unquiet

Before Texas man,
Was Tejas snake

Who comes to The Creek

The faithful of strangers, ask,
Are there always this many snakes?
Ringo Starr rattlers thumping on flat mesquite
Shakin a beat, rockin to the motion, the
Great-ten thousand-grandchildrens grandchildren
Of a blooded ground of a Future come homesteading,
Serenade of defiance in the name of
Fort Defiance, a
Down-home Woodstock Hendrix anthem,
That men defied armies, rattling sabre and rifle
For snakemeat and impossible sky

!!!43
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About the Author * CEE*

is a failed short story writer, failed novelist, and failed playwright. In the early 2000s, he
developed Carpal Tunnel Syndrome, forcing him, by 2007, to fall back to the shorthand of
poetry. Over 600 of his poems have since seen or will see some form of media. He has been
printed in such diverse publications as bear creek haiku, Jerry Jazz Musician, Children,
Churches and Daddies, Tales of the Talisman, The Storyteller, Barbaric Yawp, The
Iconoclast, Poiesis, and Dreams and Nightmares. His poem, Its An Old Story, received a
Pushcart Prize nomination in 2009.
CEE is the author of 17 chapbooks, including 12 times 12 equals
Gross, Und ihr Habt Doch Gesiegt (You Have Finally Won), I Am Not

Alternating Current
Sydney Carton, tomB Baby (with Hot Robert Toddy), and Gunther; and has
been included in the international mailers of Marymark Press.

The Cannon-Fixers Picnic *

Foodys Drinkie Market *
Obligatory Abe *
Still Life is a Human *
Homemade Custer *
Im Better Off Every Four Years *
VOX ARCANA *

Other CEE books from

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alternatingcurrentarts.com