Burford 1

Emily Burford
Mariya Tseptsura
English 120 090
5 May 2017
Learning a Second Language Did Not Make Sense
Language is defined as a method of human connection. It can be written or spoken.

Language is structured and has a conventional meaning behind it. The particular words grouped

to form sentences, forms a union with ones soul. The core ideal of language is identity, in other

words, who or what a person is. Language has shaped my identity in a fascinating way. It began

when I realized that I was trying to belong to identity that was not mine own. Spanish heavily

influences the culture around my home in New Mexico. I am particularly Anglo, and speak

English with a very subtle hint of Spanish mix into occasional words ordered off a menu at a

local restaurant, a street sign on the navigation system, or even a class I had no interest in

learning from. Other than those encounters, I never clicked with Spanish and it learned that my

identity is important and should never be forced.

My parents are from different households, but still hold the same traditional language,

English. My mother was born in California, but never lived in one place. She belonged to the

military lifestyle. She traveled much of the United States, with her parents and one younger

sister. My father, on the other hand, was born and raised in El Paso, Texas. He never learned

Spanish because his parents never spoke it, nor desired to. They met at the University of New

Mexico when I was two years old, and my sister, four years old. We were raised in primarily

privileged areas in the city and were sent to private school once we were old enough to receive

an education. A typical education included the basic subjects like reading, math, and sciences,

but also incorporated extracurricular activities like music, language, and physical education. This

is where I darted into problems.

I enjoyed school, but I really enjoyed being around other people. I never liked to be left

alone. School was a social experience for me growing up. I looked up to my teachers and related
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to my peers. I began to formulate connections with a law, or equation, or fact. Everything I

learned in school made sense and fit together like a giant puzzle being pieced together;

everything except languages, particularly Spanish. From the first day of kindergarten I was

taught Spanish. Whether it be colors, the alphabet, or short phrases, it always seemed to be tied

into our daily curriculum. This was important because I lived in a place that primarily spoke

Spanish as a second language. Just like the other subjects, I caught on quickly. I memorized the

small tasks like numbers and animals, and then the medium tasks like conjugations and prayers.

However, when I got to the larger tasks, like formulating sentences, my mind went blank and

shut off. No longer did I have to memorize something, I had to use my brain to learn.
One of the simplest ways of learning is through memorization. This is how I learned to

get through school. It worked to memorize a formula or facts from World War II, but it did not

work to speak Spanish. It was very easy for me to memorize words or short phrases, but I never

could understand the language itself. I could, and still can, pick out words here and there as

people speak Spanish around me, but I can never fully understand the emotion or creativity

behind each sentence. This is because it is a living language, meaning it has the ability to change

and develop with the time frame it is spoken in. In fact, all languages are. They all have their

own rules, forms of conjugations, and structure. I learned Spanish could not be memorized; it

must be understood and lived out. This is where I ran into problems.
As I grew older, I became frustrated with language. My patience whittled away after

being forced to learn it for thirteen years and still being incapable of holding a brief

conversation. As the frustration sunk in I realized that I did not need to learn Spanish or speak it

in a fluent tongue. The reason being, I was not Spanish. This may sound naive and immature but

it is logical. As I reflected on who I was it became very apparent that I was not Spanish, nor did I

need to be. I had no sense of urgency or connection to Spanish because it was not my roots. I do
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understand that people pick up on languages easily but most people struggle because they are not

accustomed to the culture behind the language.

In an article called Why Are You Learning a Second Language? Motivational

Orientations and Self-Determination Theory, by Kimberly A. Noels, Luc G. Pelletier, Richard

Clment, and Robert J. Vallerand, the main goals are to identify the motivation to learn a

language extrinsically and intrinsically. In this journal, they coin a few words that explain he

motivation behind learning another language. The first term it touches on is amotivation, or the

lack of motivation, they quote I dont know; I cant come to understand what I am doing

studying a second language (84). Amotivation is relatable to many people. It is a difficult

process to take on and can seem like a never-ending process when it takes so long to see

progression. The next idea they study is external regulation. This can be a pressure on an

individual to learn another language, because it is expected of them or it will benefit them in the

future. I felt this form of regulation in grade school because everyone had to learn Spanish,

regardless if they wanted to or not. Both terms are identified as extrinsic motivation because they

focus on outside forces controlling the learning of a language.

The next form of motivation is an intrinsic form. This means that internal forces will be

used to motivate an individual to learn or not learn a language. Intrinsic knowledge,

accomplishment, and motivation are the major points touched on in this journal. Keep in mind

since intrinsic motivation deals with the internal realm of a being, a psychological aspect is the

main force driving this motivation. The knowledge behind learning a language can give an

individual a satisfying feeling. This leads them to a feeling of accomplishment. Once that feeling

of accomplishment sets in, then the brain is stimulated to feel a high when the language learned

is heard by other speakers and relayed back by that individual. This idea of intrinsic motivation is

seen positively but it can be reversed as well. An individual, like myself, could feel a high in
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knowledge in the language but not feel accomplished or stimulated to speak it. They may be able

to learn a lot about the language, but not entirely grasp it. I always felt beat down when learning

Spanish because I could never fully understand it. My struggle to learn the language was internal

and external. It was internal because I would frustrate myself when I could not understand a

concept or sentence being spoken to me. I learned that I would have to have the desire to learn

Spanish at this point, if I was really going to learn it. Therefore, I discovered that language is

such a tricky thing to figure.

Language is a tricky idea to figure because there is more to it then memorizing a few

words or phrases. Language is composed of its history and stories, emotion and self-worth, and

tradition and practices; most of all language is who someone is. It is important to realize this

before jumping into this huge task of mastery. For me I had no care to be a part of another

culture because I am at peace with my own identity. I find it very intriguing to learn about

another culture but I do not want to strip myself of my own identity to be another. Language is a

beautiful form of identification and belonging. If there is respect for every culture, language can

flourish and grow. This is important. A language should never be forced; it should be desired and

natural. When language forms a union with ones soul, it allows for human connection, and that

is simply beautiful.
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Learning a Second Language Did Not Make Sense

As the process of project one was underway, SLO C was a helpful strategy I used that

allowed me to write my paper easier. SLO C is the use of multiple approaches for planning,

researching, prewriting, composing, assessing, revising, editing, proofreading, collaborating, and

incorporating feedback in order to make your compositions stronger in various mediums and

using multiple technologies. When I began this project, I started out using an outline of how I

struggled to learn a second language as I grew up. I made note of some important events, like my

inability to think fluid Spanish while memorizing the language. When I plotted out my paper, I

began to write it and then I found my scholarly source based on the outcome of my story. I chose

a source that talked about the struggles of learning another language, because that what I went

through. This source allowed me to relate to other people and realize that it is not just me who

has struggled to learn another language.

SLO E analyzes and describes the value of incorporating various languages, dialects, and

registers in your own and others texts. It was an important part of project one. Since the papers

theme was language, it was very important to incorporate different languages and dialects into

my paper. The language that I used was Spanish because that was what I tried to learn. It was

important to add some context behind it as well. I supported my claim to struggle with the

language by acknowledging facts about the Spanish culture and environment I lived in and how

it did not aid me to learn the language. Also, when using the scholarly source, I related to others

use to language and dialects to enhance my paper.

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After finishing the paper, I realized that the research and exploration of language allowed

me to go beyond my own limits to discover the world. This is where SLO G came in use. It is the

use of writing and research as a means of discovery to examine your personal beliefs in the

context of multiple perspectives and to explore focused research questions through various

mediums and technologies. We live sheltered lives and have a hard time seeing other individuals

perspectives because we are so closed off to the world and other cultures. This project allowed

me to research other stories and ideas about learning another language, and to see that I was not

the only one who struggles to learn a second language. If I am really devoted to learning another

language it would have to stem from understanding and patience. Regardless of what I decide, it

is important to respect others culture, even if they are difficult to understand. Everyone struggles

to understand, it takes patience to receive this understanding.

By reflecting upon these three student learning outcomes, it has allowed me as a student

to strengthen my writing and though process when writing papers. I am learning to become a

more confident writer and understanding that writing is a beautiful form of self-expression.

Bibliography
Noels, Kimberly A., Luc G. Pelletier, Richard Clment, and Robert J. Vallerand. "Why Are You

Learning a Second Language? Motivational Orientations and Self-Determination

Theory." Language Learning 53.S1 (2003): 33-64. Web. 5 May 2017.