Parenthood

Whenever your kids are out of control, you can take comfort from the thought that
even G-ds omnipotence did not extend to G-ds kids. After creating heaven and earth,
G-d created Adam and Eve. And the first thing He said to them was: Dont.
Dont what? Adam asked.
Dont eat the Forbidden Fruit. G-d replied.
Forbidden fruit? We got Forbidden Fruit? Hey, Eve ... we got Forbidden Fruit!
No way! Where?
Dont eat that fruit! said G-d.
Why?
Because I am your Creator and I said so! said G-d, wondering why he hadnt
stopped after making the elephants.
A few minutes later G-d saw the kids having an apple break and was angry.
Didnt I tell you not to eat that fruit? the First Parent asked.
Uh huh, Adam replied.
Then why did you?
I dunno, Eve answered.
She started it! Adam said.
Did not!
DID so!
DID NOT!
Having had it with the two of them, G-ds punishment was that Adam and Eve should
have children of their own...thus the pattern was set, and it has never changed.
Bill Cosby

Outline

The First Commandment

After The Sin
Why Have Kids?
Parenting and Giving
The Fifth Commandment

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The First Commandment

Test your Torah Trivia:

What was the very first instruction given to Adam and Chava (Eve)?
G-d blessed them and said to them

be fruitful and multiply, fill the land and
conquer it; rule over the fish of the sea,
the birds of the heavens and over all living things
that walk the earth.
Genesis 1:28

Similarly, the first instructions given to Noah after the flood include the following
And you, be fruitful and multiply. Populate the :
land and grow numerous in it.
Genesis 9:7

What does this indicate about having children?

Why have two instructions that seem to say the same thing?

Do you notice any differences between them?

According to the simple meaning, the first was a

blessing; the second was a commandment
Rashi on Genesis 9:7

Do you notice any indications in the verses themselves which would support Rashis explanation?

Let us take a look at the context of the commandment to Noah:

On who spills the blood of a person, that persons

blood shall be spilled; for in the image of G-d :
humans were formed. And you, be fruitful and
multiply. Populate the land and grow numerous
in it.

Why are these ideas (spilling of blood and having children) put together in the same verse?
This is saying that even during a time when there
is warfare and blood shed in the world, you
should not consider thisrather you should be
fruitful and multiply;

do not say why should we bring children into

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the world for them to be destroyed, it is better for

them not to be born. The verse is stressing that
you should not consider this.
Meshech Chochmah

According to this explanation, why were there two statements (one to Adam and Chavah and one to Noah)
How does this compare with Rashis explanation?

How does the Meshech Chochmahs explanation relate to the Jewish people in the twentieth century?

Consider also:
G-d blessed Noah and his family and instructed
them to multiply and fill the earth, meaning ,
that from now they should not fear putting their ,
efforts for naught and having children to no ,
purpose, like their antecedents, for fear that the
land will be destroyed due to the evil of those
who reside upon it.
Akeidat Yitzchak section 15

After The Sin

Think back to the first verse we saw:

fill the land and conquer it;
Genesis 1:28

Where were Adam and Chava living when they were told to have children?

How do you know?

After they sinnedit was said to them to be ... ...
fruitful and multiplyfor if it were before they
sinned it should have said and fill the garden
(of Eden) for that is where they were living before
they sinned.

Chizkuni ad loc

Why would they be instructed to have children only after sinning?

After they sinned and had death decreed upon
them they were commanded to propagate, for
now they needed to multiply.
Chizkuni ad loc

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What other answers could one give?

Why Have Kids?

What reasons can you think of for the mitzvah of having children?

Consider these explanations:

The root of this mitzvah is so that the world will , ,
be inhabited, for G-d desires the world to be ] , [ ,
inhabited, as it says it was not built for nothing; .
it was formed to be inhabited.

This is a great mitzvah which through it all other

mitzvoth are fulfilled, for the mitzvoth were given : ,
to people, not to angels.
Sefer HaChinuch (Mitzvah 1)

The main purpose of the mitzvah of having

children is for people to leave over a blessing
after their time, so that there should be a
continued existence of the human race,

generation after generation. This will sustain
the world and through it the person becomes a
partner with G-d in the creation.
Seder Hayom

What are the differences between these two explanations?

Parenting and Giving

Consider this Talmudic teaching:

A poor person is considered to be like dead. .
Someone without children is considered to be
.
like dead.
Nedarim 64b

How do you understand the comparison of a childless person to a dead person?

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What do a childless person and a poor person have in common?

That a poor person is compared to one that has , ,
died is not because of the things that the poor
person does not have.

Rather it is because a poor person does not have ...

the wherewithal to do good for others

For this reason a childless person is compared ,

to a dead person, for even though on the surface ,
a childless person is lacking nothing, for all of ,
the pleasures of the world are available to them, ,
the nature of a person to do good for others is
,
achieved principally by doing good for ones
. ,
children, for children accept good from their
parents more than any person accepts from
another. Someone lacking this ability to do good
for other people is considered to be like dead.
Sichos Mussar (page 270)

The Fifth Commandment

Another Torah Trivia question:

How many of the Ten Commandments can you name (its not easy!)?

Even harder: What is the Fifth Commandment?

Honor thy father and thy mother -
, -

Exodus 20:11

As we try to better understand this mitzvah, try to focus on how it can help shed light on
parenting.
The root of this mitzvah is that it is fitting for ,
a person to recognize and appreciate when ,
someone has done something good for them, and
,
a person should not be unappreciative and deny
that good, for this is an absolutely abhorrent trait .
in the eyes of G-d and of people. ,
, ,
A person should consider that his or her father
and mother are the reason why they are in this
world, and therefore it is fitting to do for them
any honor and service possible, for they have
brought you into the world, and expended great
effort when you were young.
Chinuch (mitzvah 33)

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And further:
When this trait is established in ones heart a
person will proceed from this to recognize the ,
good that G-d has done for them, for G-d is the ,
persons source and the source of our ancestors , ,
until Adam;
,
,
G-d has brought us into the world and sustained
us in all of our needs; G-d has fashioned our
:
form and the completeness of our bodies;

G-d has given us a soul of understanding, for if

not for our soul we would be like unintelligent
animals.

Through this a person will evaluate in their

thoughts how and how much it is proper to take
care in their service of G-d.

Finally, consider this Talmudic teaching:

The Rabbis taught: It says, Honor your father
and mother and it says, Honor your G-d. The
Torah equates the honor of parents with the
honor of G-d this is appropriate for the three
of them are partners. The Rabbis taught There

are three partners in a person: G-d, the father and

the mother. When a person honors their father
and mother G-d says it is as if I a living amongst
them and they are honoring me.
Kiddushin 30b

In light of what we have learned, why does G-d view honoring parents as honoring Himself?

How can being a parent thus help develop our relationship with G-d?

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