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1. The lecture on the Supernatural

A professor at the University of Greece in Kalamata is giving a lecture on the


supernatural. To get a feel for his audience, he asks: “How many people here believe in
ghosts?””
About 90 students raise their hands. ”Well that’s a good start. Out of those of you who
believe in ghosts”

2. 100

Susie came skipping up the walk. She opened the door and said, “Mommy! I got a
100 today!” The mother replied, “That’s great, dear! What did you get it in?”
“Two things,” Susie said. “I got a 46 in science, and a 54 in mathematics.”

3. Are You Punish Me?

Kid : “Do you punish people for things they don’t do?”

Teacher: “Of course, no.”

Kid : “Great! I didn’t do my homework.”

4. Fun in Class

The teacher asked a student: “Do you know where Mt.Everestis?,the talllest mountain in the
world?”
The student said: “I am sorry teacher,i don’t know where it is.”
The teacher said angrily: “You don’t know? Stand up on the chair!”
The student stood up on the chair in the astonishing manner and said: “Teacher, can I see
Mt.Everest by standing in the chair?”

5. Broom

A young man hired by a supermarket reported for his first day of work. The manager
greeted him with a warm handshake and a smile, gave him a broom and said, “Your first job
will be to sweep out the store.”
“But I’m a college graduate,” the young man replied indignantly.
“Oh, I’m sorry. I didn’t know that,” said the manager. “Here, give me the broom. I’ll show
you how.”
6. Half Day

One day there was a class of kids at school. They were having a hard time
concentrating on the work because it was snowing so hard outside. They were just waiting for
that blessed announcement of the rest of the day off.

Suddenly, the intercom beeped and they heard the voice of their principal; “Attention,
students. Due to the weather conditions, we will only be attending school a half of the day
this morning.”

After all the students’ cheers had stopped, the principal continued; “And we will be
attending the other half this afternoon.”

Narrative text

1. True Friends

Once upon a time, there were two close friends who were walking through the forest
together. They knew that anything dangerous can happen any time in the forest. So they
promised each other that they would always be together in any case of danger.

Suddenly, they saw a large bear getting closer toward them. One of them climbed a
nearby tree at once. But unfortunately the other one did not know how to climb up the tree.
So being led by his common sense, he lay down on the ground breathless and pretended to be
a dead man.

The bear came near the one who was lying on the ground. It smelt in his ears, and slowly
left the place because the bears do not want to touch the dead creatures. After that, the friend
on the tree came down and asked his friend that was on the ground, "Friend, what did the
bear whisper into your ears?" The other friend replied, "Just now the bear advised me not to
believe a false friend."

Moral of the Story- A true friend in need is a friend indeed.

2. Fox and A Cat

One day a cat and a fox were having a conversation. The fox, who was a conceited
creature, boasted how clever she was. 'Why, I know at least a hundred tricks to get away from
our mutual enemies, the dogs,' she said.

'I know only one trick to get away from dogs,' said the cat. 'You should teach me some of
yours!'
'Well, maybe some day, when I have the time, I may teach you a few of the simpler ones,'
replied the fox airily.
Just then they heard the barking of a pack of dogs in the distance. The barking grew
louder and louder - the dogs were coming in their direction! At once the cat ran to the nearest
tree and climbed into its branches, well out of reach of any dog. 'This is the trick I told you
about, the only one I know,' said the cat. 'Which one of your hundred tricks are you going to
use?'

The fox sat silently under the tree, wondering which trick she should use. Before she
could make up her mind, the dogs arrived. They fell upon the fox and tore her to pieces.

Moral : A single plan that works is better than a hundred doubtful plans.

3. The Ant and the Dove

One hot day, an ant was seeking for some water. After walking around for a moment, she
came to a spring. To reach the spring, she had to climb up a blade of grass. While making her
way up, she slipped and fell unintentionally into the water.

She could have sunk if a dove up a nearby tree had not seen her. Seeing that the ant was
in trouble, the dove quickly put off a leaf from a tree and dropped it immediately into the
water near the struggling ant. Then the ant moved towards the leaf and climbed up there.
Soon it carried her safely to dry ground.

Not long after at that, there was a hunter nearby who was throwing out his net towards the
dove, hoping to trap it in this way.

Guessing what he should do, the ant quickly bit him on the heel. Feeling the pain, the
hunter dropped his net and the dove flew away quickly from this net.
The morality: One good turn deserves another.

Pesan Moral: Satu perbuatan baik layak mendapat kebaikan yang lain .

4. The Fox and the Grapes

One afternoon there was a fox that was walking through the forest and spotted a bunch of
grapes hanging from over a lofty branch. “Just the thing to quench my thirst,” quoted the fox.
Taking a few steps backward, the fox jumped but unfortunately he missed the hanging
grapes. Again the fox took a few paces backward, ran, and tried to reach them but he still
failed.

Finally, giving up, the fox turned up his nose and said, “They’re probably sour anyway,”
and proceeded to walk away.

Moral Value: it’s easy to despise what you cannot have.


5. The Lion and The Mouse

When he was awakened by a tiny Mouse running across his body, a mighty Lion was
sleeping in his lair. The lion then grabbed the frightened mouse with his huge paws and
opened his mouth to swallow him directly. "Please, King," begged the Mouse, "Spare me this
time and of course I will never forget your kindness. Someday I may be able to repay you.
"The Lion thought that it was such an amusing idea that he let the poor creature go.

Sometimes later the Lion was caught in a net laid by some hunters. Despite his great
strength, the Lion could not break free. Soon the forest echoed with angry load roars.

The Little Mouse heard the Lion and ran to see what was wrong. As soon as he succeeded
to make the Lion free "There!" said the Mouse proudly, " You laughed at me when I
promised to repay your kindness, but now you know that even a tiny Mouse can help a
mighty Lion."
Moral Value:

1. Little friends may prove to be great friends.


2. Friend in need is friend indeed.

Hortatory Exposition Text

1. corruption

Do you know what the meaning of corruption is? What is the relation between money and
corruption? Well, corruption is common everywhere in the world, even in the United States.
It’s just a matter of intensity. However, it is quite shocking when one reliable survey claims
Jakarta as the most corrupt place in Indonesia.

The survey has made me sad, actually, because I stay and earn a living here in the capital.
As most people know, Tanjung Priok port smuggling is not a new thing at all. Entrepreneurs
who want to minimize their tax payments tend to do such a thing more often. They even bribe
the officials.

Well, I think the measures taken so far to overcome the problem by punishing the
corruptors is still not far enough. We have to prevent the younger generations from getting a
bad mentality caused by corruption.

I believe we should start at the earliest stages in school and I think everyone should be
involved in the effort to eradicate corruption. We must not make any distinction.

Adapted from: The Jakarta Post, February 2005


2. Monitoring Kids While Watching TV

Television becomes one of the most important devices which takes place in almost
houses. It can unite all members of the family as well as separate them. However, is it
important to know what your kids are watching? The answer is, of course, absolutely “Yes”
and that should be done by all parents. Television can expose things you have tried to protect
the children from, especially violence, pornography, consumerism and so on.

Recently, a study demonstrated that spending too much time on watching TV during the
day or at bedtime often cause bed-time disruption, stress, and short sleep duration.
Another research found that there is a significant relationship between the amount of time
spent for watching television during adolescence and early adulthood, and the possibility of
being aggressive.

Meanwhile, many studies have identified a relationship between kids who watch TV a lot
and being inactive and overweight.

Considering some facts mentioning above, protect your children with the following tips:
1. Limit television viewing to one-two hours each day
2. Do not allow your children to have a TV set in their own bedrooms
3. Review the rating of TV shows which your children watch
4. Watch television with your children and discuss what is happening in the show

3. Music is Fun for Learning English

Learning English through music and songs can be very enjoyable. You can mix
pleasure with learning when you listen to a song and exploit the song as a means to your
English progress. Some underlying reason can be drawn to support the idea why we use
songs in language learning.

Firstly, “the song stuck in my head” Phenomenon (the echoing in our minds of the last
song we heard after leaving a restaurant, shopping malls, etc) can be both enjoyable and
sometimes unnerving. This phenomenon also seems to reinforce the idea that songs work on
our short-and-long term memory.

Secondly, songs in general also use simple conversational language, with a lot of
repetition, which is just what many learners look for sample text. The fact that they are
effective makes them many times more motivating than other text. Although usually simple,
some songs can be quite complex syntactically, lexically and poetically, and can be analyzed
in the same way as any other literary sample.

Furthermore, song can be appropriated by listener for their own purpose. Most pop
songs and probably many other types don’t have precise people, place or time reference.
In addition, songs are relaxing. They provide variety and fun, and encourage harmony within
oneself and within one group. Little wonder they are important tools in sustaining culture,
religion, patriotism and yeas, even revolution.

Last but not least, there are many learning activities we can do with songs such as
studying grammar, practicing selective listening comprehension, translating songs, learning
vocabulary, spelling and culture.

4. The Importance of Speaking English

English nowadays has an important role in our daily life. It is the massive means of
communication. Is there a strong argument which says that English will not give any benefit?
Learning to speak English well may be the best way to improve our life. It seems all the
people in the world have agreed to use English to talk to each other. About 1,500,000,000
people in the world speak English. While another 1,000,000,000 are still learning English.

If we can communicate in English, we can contact people from all over the world. We can
talk about our ideas and opinions on Internet discussion groups. We can chat with other
interesting people to learn about their life and culture

If we can communicate in English, we can travel more easily. English is spoken in more
than 100 countries. If we lost, we can ask directions or ask for help. Who knows, English will
save our life somewhere someday.

That is why we should make every effort possible to find somebody to speak with. Where
can we find people who can speak English with us? We can find them at school, shopping
mall, tourist destination, etc

Above all, don’t be afraid to speak English. We must try to speak, even if we make
mistakes. We can not learn without mistakes. So, speak English as much as possible!

5. Tourism Should be Benefit on Local People

What is the benefit of tourism for local people? Well, Tourism is now a huge contributor
to the economies of most countries. Tourism industries can bring money, job vacancy and
advancement especially to developing regions. However, this money often goes into the
pockets of foreign investors, and only rarely benefits for local people.

Tourism industries will not give much benefit for local people if, for example,
multinational hotel chains don’t care about the surrounding nature when they build new
hotels. This can cause many social, cultural and geographical problems. Some local people
may get job and money from that International hotel chain. However in case of missing that
opportunity, some of them still have their own environment.Moreover, some facts show that
tourists tend to go, visit and spend their money in restaurants, bars and even luxury hotels of
that multinational chains. They less go to such places; restaurant, bar, hotel, shop which are
owned by local people. This can prevent the local people’s business from becoming even
larger.Most important thing, tours or excursions of tourism have little effect on nature. Even
it can disrupt or destroy ecosystems and environments, and if it does, the local people will get
the risk.

So the local government policies should be put in place to ensure that tourism will make
the benefit spreading widely. The policies should guarantee that tourism will not cause any
harm to any local people or places.

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