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Connection NOT Perfection™

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AEE Episode 502: How To Show Your Empathy For A Customer Without
Bad Mouthing Your Company In English
Announcer: This is an All Ears English Podcast, Episode 502: “How to Show Your
Empathy for a Customer Without Bad Mouthing Your Company in English”
[Instrumental]
Announcer: Welcome to the All Ears English Podcast, downloaded more than 16
million times. We believe in Connection NOT Perfection ™ with your
American hosts Lindsay McMahon, the ‘English Adventurer’, and Michelle
Kaplan, the ‘New York Radio Girl,’ coming to you from Boston and New
York City, USA.
[Instrumental]
Announcer: And to instantly download your transcript from today’s episode go to

AllEarsEnglish.com/transcripts, AllEarsEnglish.com/transcripts.
[Instrumental]
Announcer: Today we answer a question from Hiren who wonders how he can
empathize with the customers at his company who complain about prices
while also defending his company and keeping his job, find out how to do
it in English today.
© All Ears English www.allearsenglish.com

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[Instrumental]
Announcer: Guys the best way to find a native teacher in seconds and work with that
teacher from home online is at italki, go to AllEarsEnglish.com/italki.
[Instrumental]
Lindsay: Hey (Hi) Michelle, welcome back. How are you doing this week? How
(are) you feeling?
Michelle: Hey (Hi) Lindsay, I’m good. I’m good. I’m still getting over a little bit of jet
lag but I’m good. How are you?
Lindsay: I know we are so happy that you’re back. I mean our listeners may not
have noticed because we had our recorded episodes done before you left.
You were in India for two and half weeks, right?
Michelle: I was. Yeah (yes), still getting over the jet lag I did wake up at 3:30 in the
morning today so [laughter]
Lindsay: Oh no, how long was the flight from New York to India?
Michelle: We had a layover in Dubai and then from Dubai it’s like three or four
hours. Um but the one from India I don't know, I don’t even know it could
have been 13, 14, 15, 16 I don't know.
Lindsay: It was a long…
Michelle: It was a long time.
Lindsay: Well today, Michelle we had a question from one of our awesome
listeners from Hiren who is living in Dallas, Texas.
Michelle: Hmm
Lindsay: Interesting place to be living.
Michelle: Mhh hhm.
Lindsay: Right I mean it’s so funny how different Texas is from the rest – well from
the northeast where we live in New York and Boston, right, but a listener is
going through a common situation where he is working at a drug store in

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the U.S. and he wanted some ideas about how to be empathic when he is
around customers.
Michelle: Mhh hhm.
Lindsay: We have already done one episode on empathy and we’ll show you guys
how to find that but why don’t we read this listener’s question, Michelle
and then let’s try to answer it. Let’s do our very best.
Michelle: Okay, alright so here’s the question. “Hello Lindsay and Michelle. This is
Hiren (sorry I’m hope I’m pronouncing that right) from Dallas, Texas. First
of all, I really enjoy listening to your podcast because they are very
informative and filled with lots of energy that you bring out.” Thank you.
Lindsay: Thank you.
Michelle: So thank you for that. You’re welcome thank you for listening.
Lindsay: [Laughter]
Michelle: “And then there is a question I want to ask you, I work at a pharmacy and
many times I experience this situation when prescriptions are absurdly
expensive and I really struggle to respond when customers get angry,
frustrated, stressed out or sad. So what kind of phrases can I use to
respond to all of these above mentioned reactions in such difficult
situations without being critical to the company that I work for?” That is a
toughie.
Lindsay: That is really good question though, isn’t it? It sounds like…
Michelle: That’s a really interesting question and I’m sorry you have to deal with
that. That’s hard.
Lindsay: I know it’s really interesting and it sounds like our listener here is going to
really have to strike that balance between empathizing with the customer
and still representing the company. Yeah (yes)?
Michelle: Mhh hhm.
Lindsay: And the first thing that comes to my mind Michelle is that the company,
they should be training you, Hiren, on this.

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Michelle: Right, right, yeah (yes) that would be helpful.
Lindsay: I’m kind of shocked that they’re not you know they should be providing
English lessons for their employees and I’m kind of mad that they are not
actually because it’s a very delicate situation if you’re handing out drugs
that you’re charging them for their medication, these people are in a very
vulnerable place, right?
Michelle: Right. Right.
Lindsay: You know and if you’re from another country so we want to say that we
can imagine how hard this is for you, Hiren and we want to help you out
today. So I would recommend if this is your situation or for anyone else
who really needs to focus on learning phrases like these to get the
transcripts because those transcripts are now available, guys, if you go
over to AllEarsEnglish.com/transcripts you can download this week’s
episode or you can sign on to get them every single week for a 35%
discount, a really good way to learn. Okay?
Michelle: Excellent.
Lindsay: Yeah (yes). So what’s the big lesson here what are we basically talking
about Michelle?
Michelle: Yeah (yes), well we are talking about empathy, right?
Lindsay: Empathy, yeah (yes). What is empathy anyways?
Michelle: It’s like feeling the pain of someone else.
Lindsay: Yeah (yes), are you good at it, Michelle? Do you think you have this skill
down?
Michelle: Um I think I have it a little too much.
Lindsay: I think you’re really good at it. I think you seem like you have a lot of
empathy.
Michelle: Sometimes I think it is too much.

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Lindsay: Yeah (yes), I mean you were just telling me a couple of stories about some
things that happened in India.
Michelle: Yeah (yes).
Lindsay: And it sounds like you had a lot of empathy.
Michelle: Yeah (yes), yeah (yes), yeah (yes) for sure.
Lindsay: Yeah (yes) so it’s tricky, we don’t want to criticize the company but – and
we also want to empathize with the person. We don’t want to “bad
mouth” the company, right?
Michelle: Mhh hhm.
Lindsay: I like that expression. What does that mean? I mean it’s kind of obvious
right?
Michelle: Yeah (yes), to say bad things about it.
Lindsay: Yeah (yes).
Michelle: From your mouth. [laughter]
Lindsay: Exactly. Yeah (yes), it’s funny because I was sort of in a similar situation
this week but I was from the perspective of the customer, I was trying to
get insurance. I called Geico twice this week. I called on Tuesday and I
asked about getting insurance on a rental car and then I got denied.
[laughter] They said they couldn’t service me.
Michelle: Ahhh
Lindsay: Because they don’t do insurance on rental cars. And then I called the next
day and I asked about getting insurance on a leased car. I was just trying
to survey my options to see what to do about getting a car for the summer
and the second time I called they blacklisted my name. They could not
help me for the second inquiry
Michelle: Whoa!
Lindsay: Because they thought that my first question on Tuesday was a high risk
question. I sounded like a high risk person to insure.

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Michelle: Oh my gosh.
Lindsay: Yeah (yes), it was incredible. So they had my name in the system and my
number.
Michelle: Oh.
Lindsay: And they said I’m sorry we won’t be able to serve you for six months.
Michelle: Oh my gosh.
Lindsay: Yeah (yes), I was mad. I felt like I was being profiled and I was being
profiled [laughter].
Michelle: Yeah (yes), yeah (yes).
Lindsay: Because these insurance companies, I mean they obviously have to be

careful about their risk and apparently to them based on my questions I
was a high risk customer but I was very upset that I was being evaluated
just the questions that I was asking, you know.
Michelle: Right, right.
Lindsay: I wasn’t trying to apply for um insurance that day, I was just asking some
basic questions. So as the customer I was upset and the person on the
other side that’s the point in a similar position to what Hiren is in, he was
good, he did a good job of representing his company well but also
empathizing with me.
Michelle: Mhh hhm.
Lindsay: He said things like “I do understand why that would be upsetting”, “I’m
very sorry”, “You can feel free to call us back in six months” things like that
so he did a nice job of that.
Michelle: That’s good.
Lindsay: Yeah (yes), have you ever had that problem with an insurance company?
Michelle: Oh, not that I can think of off the top of my head but yeah (yes) [laughter]
oh I don't know not that I can think of right now but that’s a really
frustrating situation.

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Lindsay: Yeah (yes) and I mean also the bigger issue here for Hiren is the cost of
medication in the U.S., right?
Michelle: Right. That’s true.
Lindsay: Did you hear about that case with this guy Martin Shkreli?
Michelle: No.
Lindsay: You didn’t hear about this at all? So okay, the owner of – so the prices of
healthcare you know medication in the U.S. can get really out of control,
right, especially when the prices are being determined by these CEOs.
Michelle: Mhh hhm.
Lindsay: This kid, he is like a kid.
Michelle: Oh oh oh
Lindsay: Like 28.
Michelle: Oh yes, now I know what you’re talking about. Yes, I have.
Lindsay: Yeah (yes), so back like in the fall.
Michelle: Yes.
Lindsay: He raised the price of AIDS medication by 5,000%.
Michelle: Right. Right, I remember this.
Lindsay: Yeah (yes) it was all over the news because he works for this company
called Turing Pharmaceuticals, the price moved up from $13 per tablet to
$750 per tablet.
Michelle: Hmm.
Lindsay: It’s just incredible, incredible, you know obviously he is taking advantage
of very vulnerable people and he refused to bring the price down when he
was asked to change it. So he went to jail. He went to jail for something
else but it was all over the news so that is why Hiren one of the reasons for
– like decisions like this are being made and that’s why you’re having to

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deal with these high prices and having to deal with upset customers. It’s a
big problem in this country.
Michelle: Yeah (yes). He is like a young guy, right? Martin Shkreli?
Lindsay: Yeah (yes), he’s a young guy, he’s like 26 or 27 or something like that.
Michelle: Yeah (yes), yeah (yes), yeah (yes), yeah (yes). Oh.
Lindsay: Oh horrible.
Lindsay: So let’s show Hiren and other listeners how do this like if you are in this
position, you know if you’re working for a company and the customer is
upset, how do you respond?
Michelle: Mhh hhm.
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[Instrumental]
Lindsay: Michelle what is the first thing that we could do?
Michelle: Okay well, I mean you have to show that you empathize with them, right?
You understand where they are coming from so you could say things like:
“I understand”; “I know what you mean”; “I understand how you feel” or
“I understood how you feel” right?
Lindsay: Yeah (yes). Or “I’m so sorry that we don’t have a better solution for you”,
right?
Michelle: Uh huh.

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Lindsay: So yeah (yes) that’s the first thing I would do and you can go back to
episode 481 to find the episode on how to emphasize with people to get
more details on that. So we won’t go into too much detail on how to
empathize because it’s already been done in a different episode.
Michelle: Right, right.
Lindsay: So after we do that what’s the next thing that we could do?
Michelle: Well, I think this is a really important one. Um show that it’s not in your
control and I think it’s important because people tend to get angry at the
person who’s you know giving them this bad news.
Lindsay: Oh yeah (yes), I mean it’s a good one and also when I’m a customer from
the customer’s end I get even more angry though when they say that to
me. [laughter]
Lindsay: Because you know I guess it’s not in their control but I get angry because
well can’t you talk to your manager.
Michelle: That’s true.
Lindsay: What else can you do? But I think it’s an important step.
Lindsay: So what are some things that we could do show that it’s not in your
control?
Michelle: Right. Well you could say, “There isn’t a whole lot that I can do”.
Lindsay: Right.
Michelle: Um, you could also say, “I don’t have any control over these prices”.
Lindsay: Yeah (yes). And that’s really the best you can do is to just show where you
are in the whole situation which is without power basically.
Michelle: Right. Right, exactly.

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Lindsay: But there might be some kind of solution that you could offer. You know
you could say “Well can I connect you to my manager on this?” right?
Michelle: Mhh hhm. Mhh hhm. Yeah (yes), “Would you like to speak with my
manager?”
Lindsay: Or “Could I offer you another suggestion?” maybe there is another

medication, you know as long as you have the authority to do that.
Michelle: Right, right. Yeah (yes).
Lindsay: You know another way that they could get the medication for a lower
price if it’s within your, you know, authorization to do that, right?
Michelle: Right, right. Or you could say, “Could you contact your insurance
company?”
Lindsay: Yeah (yes). So try to offer little suggestions as much as you can and I think
a big part of that is empathy, is empathizing by offering other suggestions.
Lindsay: Yeah (yes). So let’s just play out this little role, Michelle, where we’re at a
Walgreens or a CVS pharmacy and one of us is trying to get our drugs
because we have diabetes and the other is charging us for those drugs.
Michelle: Okay. [laughter]
Lindsay: So here we go.
Michelle: Okay. Hi there welcome to XYZ drugs. What can I help you with today?
Lindsay: Oh, I’m back here to pick up my diabetes medication, my doctor called in
my prescription yesterday.
Michelle: Oh okay, alright, let me check and see if we have it. What’s the name?
Lindsay: McMahon.
Michelle: Oh here it is. Okay, let me just scan this in for you.
Lindsay: Great, thanks.

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Michelle: Okay so that we will be $357.89.
Lindsay: What?! For one refill?
Michelle: Let me make sure that is correct. Oh yes, ma’am I’m afraid that is a new
price on these meds.
Lindsay: That can’t be true, I can’t afford it.
Michelle: I understand.
Lindsay: No, but you don’t understand. If I don’t get these meds, my blood sugar
will be out of control.
Michelle: I don’t have any control over these prices. Would you like to speak with
my manager about this?
Lindsay: Yes, please. I’ll wait. Okay.
Michelle: Oh.
Lindsay: Oh, I was mad. I mean.
Lindsay: This is like a desperate situation.
Lindsay: And it makes me really sad that in this country, we do have to go through
these situations. I mean Hiren is seeing this, right, from the first hand
perspective that in the U.S. a lot of medications can be very expensive and
it’s kind of a life or death situation. If you have diabetes and you can’t
your medication, you’re like in danger.
Michelle: Right.
Lindsay: Your life is in danger.
Michelle: Right.
Lindsay: This is a serious disease.

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Lindsay: Yeah (yes), I like how you said “I’m afraid”, right, “I’m afraid”, I’m not sure
if we taught that phrase to our listeners but I really like how you said, “Yes,
ma’am, “I’m afraid” that that is the new price on these meds.”
Michelle: Thank you.
Lindsay: That was very good. I mean what else did we use here in this
conversation?
Michelle: Um let’s see well. Yeah (yes), yeah (yes). I’m afraid that that is the new
price on these meds. Ah and then I said “I understand”. But you said, “No,
but you don’t understand.” Yeah (yes), the thing is people are going to be
upset.
Lindsay: People are and they are going to take it out on you. I like the expression
“to take it out on someone”, I don’t like it when it happens but it’s a good
expression. [laughter]
Lindsay: So I think that the point is to – if you are working in a customer service
position even if it’s like you’re working for Comcast and you’re helping
people with their internet connection, in some cases that’s even more
emotional than medication. [laughter]
Michelle: [laughter]
Lindsay: You know any kind of customer service position, guys, you know you might
face this so you need to know what to say and again your company should
be providing training on this.
Lindsay: But we are able to give you guys a few phrases here. You said, “I don’t
have any control over these prices.” I like that.
Michelle: Right. Right. And then I said, “Would you like to speak with my manager
about this?”

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Lindsay: Right so you
Michelle: The manager might not be happy with me. [laughter]
Lindsay: No, I mean just to kind of move this attention somewhere else.
Lindsay: What else can you do? It’s a tough situation to be in. So for Hiren I hope
we have offered you a couple of good suggestions today. If I were you,
Hiren, I would go back and listen to episode 481 and get those phrases on
how to emphasize one more time and just do the best you can but if
you’re working in a customer service position just kind of expect some
anger people sometimes.
Michelle: Yeah (yes), I mean it’s kind of just part of the job, I guess, unfortunately.
Lindsay: It’s a tough job, yeah (yes).
Lindsay: So we want to wish you the best of luck with that.
Michelle: Yeah (yes). [laughter]
Lindsay: Alright so this has been a good topic, Michelle, and hopefully drug prices
will be – will get under control here in the States. It’s very scary.
Michelle: It really is.
Lindsay: Yeah (yes). I mean have you ever had to purchase any expensive drugs?
Michelle: Ah, well yeah (yes) I just had to purchase some things for my trip to India
so.
Lindsay: Oh yeah (yes), okay. Yeah (yes) for sure.
Lindsay: Yeah (yes), okay, well we don’t have a solution for that today
unfortunately but [laughter]

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Lindsay: We’ll see what happens in the future with healthcare in the U.S. with the
new president coming in. Right?
Michelle: Absolutely. Yup (yes) that’s a big topic.
Lindsay: Big topic in the news and we’ll be going into that I’m sure as we get closer
to the elections and all of that stuff we’ll be going into what’s going on
with the presidential race, yeah (yes).
Lindsay: Okay, alright Michelle. I will see you back here tomorrow.
Michelle: See you soon.
Lindsay: Bye.
Michelle: Bye.
[Instrumental]
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AEE Episode 503: Is It Okay To Not Be All Ears When You Listen To All
Ears English?
Announcer: This is an All Ears English Podcast, Episode 503: “Is It Okay to Be Not All
Ears When You Listen to AEE?”
[Instrumental]
million times. We believe in Connection NOT Perfection with your
York City, USA.
[Instrumental]

[Instrumental]

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Announcer: Today we answer a question from a listener who plays our episodes every
day but often gets distracted, is it okay to learn this way? Find out today.
[Instrumental]
Announcer: Do you want to build better relationships at work? Do you want people to
actually like you and to walk into work in a confident manner every day?
You can build those skills in the Charismatic Connector, it’s our new
course. Go to AllEarsEnglish.com/charisma to get started for free. See
you there.
[Instrumental]
Lindsay: Hey (Hi) there Michelle, how (are) you doin’ (doing)?
Michelle: Hey (Hi) Lindsay, I’m doing well. I’m doing well. How are you?
Lindsay: I’m feeling good. I’m feeling good and I want to remind our listeners
about the Charismatic Connector because this course has been really
popular in the last couple of month. Guys, Michelle, what was the most
important thing that we kind of communicated in that course for our
listeners, what do you think?
Michelle: Oh well, just how to be charismatic in the workplace, right?
Michelle: It’s really a lot about um how to be successful in your job.
Lindsay: Yeah (yes), exactly. We define success as having people like us so I think
that a lot of our listeners, you know, you guys are really high in your field
and you know so much but I think that part of the problem is that you feel
like you can’t build the business relationships that you want to build and
when that happens and you don’t have those relationships you can’t move
up in your company.
Michelle: Right, right. Yeah (yes), exactly.
Lindsay: That’s the truth, yeah (yes). We want to help you guys get over that
hurdle so you can actually get started with a free video series if you go to

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AllEarsEnglish.com/charisma so go on over there now guys and get that

free download. Michelle, what are we talking about today?
Michelle: Alright, so today we are talking about different ways to learn.
Lindsay: Yeah (yes), exactly. I mean it’s interesting now there is not just one way to
do it. There’s more than one way to learn. I mean we think that the only
way to learn is to sit and bury our nose in our notes but it’s not the truth.
Michelle: Yeah (yes) absolutely. I mean different people learn in different ways. I
think it is important to get a “happy medium” of different styles of
learning.
Lindsay: Ooo, I like that expression “happy medium”.
Michelle: “Happy medium”
Lindsay: Very cool. Nice, Michelle.
Michelle: Thank you.
Lindsay: What does that mean “happy medium”?
Michelle: It’s like a little bit of everything, like that “sweet spot”.
Lindsay: “Sweet spot” yes.
Michelle: I’m just full of them today right?
Lindsay: “Sweet spot” on a tennis racket is the perfect place to hit the ball. It’s just
where everything flows, it’s that perfect balance that is the “happy
medium”. So today we have a question from one of our listener so let’s go
ahead and read it and try to answer our question about – his question
about how to learn with All Ears English.
Michelle: Okay, what is the name of this?
Lindsay: We don’t know the student’s name unfortunately. So we are just going to
read out the question.
Michelle: Okay.
Lindsay: And hopefully, he’ll be listening and he will recognize his question.

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Michelle: I hope so too. Okay, here we go. “First of all I want to say thanks because
it’s a pleasure to listen to you guys every single day. I’ve been working
really hard to improve my English skills because I want to reach the
advanced level and you guys are one of the main parts of my studies.
Thanks for that.” Yay! You’re welcome.
Lindsay: [laughter]
Michelle: “Having said that now, I have a question. I would like to know about the
English immersion is it effective to keep listening to English even when
you’re not paying total attention to what’s being said?” Hmm.
Interesting. “Let me give you an example. I have an internship at
Mercedes Benz.” Wow.
Lindsay: Whoa.
Michelle: That’s awesome. [laughter] “And every time that it’s lunch time and I go
to the restaurant to have my meal, I put my headphones on and start to
listen to the English podcast while I’m eating my food but sometimes I get
distracted by the noise around me or by silly things and it’s so hard to keep
focused on the whole audio. Can you guys help me please? By the way,
you guys should do daily episodes; you two are the best thing on the
internet. Nothing is better than you guys when it comes to connection
when learning English. Thanks one more time.” You are welcome that is
so nice. Thank you.
Lindsay: That’s wonderful. Thank you and I’m so glad that our listener here is
asking this question cuz (because) guys these are the kinds of questions
you should be asking if you also want to move to the advanced level. I
really like how conscious this listener is…
Michelle: Oh yeah (yes).
Lindsay: About his learning style, what a cool question to ask. Yeah (yes).
Michelle: Yes.
Lindsay: So good, so good. So I mean this comes down to the fact that Michelle
that there are different ways to learn. Right?

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Michelle: Mhh hhm.
Lindsay: There are two different ways to learn; there is a focused learning and
there is a diffuse learning. And I did a little research; I took a little mini
course in Coursera called “Learning How to Learn”.
Michelle: Mhh hhm.
Lindsay: And it was taught by Terry Sejnowski and Barbara Oakley. So Terry
Sejnowski is a big name in neuroscience.
Michelle: Mhh hhm.
Lindsay: And he talks a lot about diffuse learning. You know where it’s kind of a
broader way of thinking. It’s a resting state for our mind, right. For
example when we take a walk, we take a shower, we drift off to sleep, you
know this is a way of relaxing the mind and we are still building
connections between what we learned in focused learning.
Michelle: Hmm.
Lindsay: What is focused learning, Michelle?
Michelle: I mean focused learning is sitting down studying from the book.
Michelle: Really being focused, exactly what it sounds like.
Lindsay: Exactly so I think for this listener, he is asking us about something about
between that is somewhere between focused learning and diffuse
learning, right. He is asking us about is it okay to listen to All Ears English
and other podcasts when he is getting distracted and there are other
things going on. What do you think Michelle? Is that okay?
Michelle: I think so. I mean I think that’s you know, I think like I said I think that
there is a “happy medium”.
Lindsay: Mhh hhm.
Michelle: But I think that it’s okay to do that because it’s diffuse learning really,
right?

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Lindsay: Yeah (yes), yeah (yes). I think it’s moving into the diffuse learning. Yeah
(yes).
Michelle: Getting there kind of on that track. Umm, it’s not – it’s a little bit different,
right?
Michelle: Because it sounds like diffuse learning is more like oh when you’re doing
something else completely.
Lindsay: Exactly.
Michelle: And it just lets it settle in but yeah (yes) this is more I think actually that
ability to kind of shift your attention a lot back and forth from paying
attention and kind of getting distracted. I think that it can actually be
helpful in some ways. What do you think?
Lindsay: Hmm. I think you’re right, I mean I don’t think that our brains can handle
constant focused learning, you know?
Michelle: Yeah (yes). Oh yeah (yes).
Lindsay: Especially now that we have the internet and we are always being swayed
to a new website, clicking on the next link. I mean if you think about the
Pomodoro Method. Do you know anything about the Pomodoro Method,
Michelle?
Michelle: Ah no.
Lindsay: It’s not just for language learning. It’s for studying. It’s a studying method
where you have a timer and they break up your focused learning into
about 20 minute chunks and then you’re supposed to walk away. I think
it’s 5 minutes or 10 minutes and do something else totally and then come
back and set the timer for 20 minutes, focused learning then do your 5
minutes of diffuse learning doing something else.
[Instrumental]
Announcer: Guys if you are listening to today’s episode and you like what you hear and
you’d like to make sure that you understand all the new vocabulary that

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you’re learning today, go to AllEarsEnglish.com/transcripts and get a full

professionally done transcript of this episode,
AllEarsEnglish.com/transcripts.
[Instrumental]
Michelle: Yeah (yes), yeah (yes). I think it’s really important to kind of just let your
brain like – let everything settle in, right?
Lindsay: Oh, it’s so true that’s why if we don’t do that we get “burnt out”.
Michelle: Yeah (yes). Oh I like that “burnt out”. [laughter]
Lindsay: “Burnt out” I like that expression. I feel kind of “burnt out” right now
because I’ve been working very hard. I haven’t taken too many vacations.
I’m hoping to take a vacation in the summertime, right.
Lindsay: To kind of let ideas percolate, let ideas sink in and get new creative ideas
and visions for All Ears English.
Michelle: Right, right. For sure, yeah (yes). I mean it’s important to kind of like just
let the daily routine go and let everything just sink in. I mean I think also
about sleep, right? Don’t they say that you know that you learn a lot in
your sleep that you’re able process?
Lindsay: Yeah (yes). For sure that’s right.
Michelle: While you’re sleeping.
Lindsay: Yeah (yes). I mean how do you feel, Michelle because you just came back
from India and you know you weren’t working there. You were really
relaxing and taking in new things, I mean how do you feel in your mind
mentally? Do you feel relaxed? Do you feel cleared up? How do you feel?
Michelle: Oh I feel definitely prepared um to do ah to really get back into the swing
of things.
Lindsay: Good. Yeah (yes).

23
Michelle: I mean it wasn’t you know I’m tired because of the long flight and the trip
was very busy and hectic and I moved around a lot so physically it wasn’t
too easy but mentally I think in the sense that I wasn’t – I was taking a
little break from my daily – what I’m usually thinking about, right? And I
was thinking about other things so…
Lindsay: Yeah (yes), I like that.
Lindsay: We need a break. We need a break. We need to move away from it. So I
think that the best recommendation for our listener here is the short
answer is yes, it’s okay to put your headphones in and actually I think it’s
good. The other thing I like about this is that you put your headphones in
and maybe someone distracts you and you stop listening for a few minutes
and then you come back to it. You get comfortable moving in and out of
listening to English, right? It kind of takes away …
Michelle: Ahh
Lindsay: That anxiety, it makes it more of a song and we sink into it.
Lindsay: I think that we need that. We need to get comfortable around the English
language and loosen up.
Michelle: Yeah (yes), yeah (yes). I agree. I agree. It makes it like a little bit more
natural because you know in your daily life there are so many distractions,
right, so.
Lindsay: Yup (yes) (Yes).
Michelle: It’s very rare nowadays in my opinion to just stay focused on something
for such a long time so really when you’re studying of course you know
you want to do that a little bit but I think that it’s helpful and more – very
natural to have interruptions.
Lindsay: Yeah (yes), I feel like we get a lot messages from our listeners who have a
tendency to kind of panic when they don’t understand something in

24
English. And why does that panic happen? I mean I have a theory that it
happens because we are not used to listening to the language so as soon
as we hear English we feel like oh my gosh I have to understand every
word.
Michelle: Right.
Lindsay: And all of a sudden our mind gets very tight and the anxiety comes and
that’s when we get in trouble but if every day we’re just listening to the
sounds of English.
Michelle: Right.
Lindsay: We’re not putting pressure on ourselves to necessarily understand and in

addition to that we are taking time to do that focused learning because
that’s important too, right?
Michelle: Right, oh yeah (yes).
Lindsay: Where we want to sit down with the transcripts, right?
Michelle: Right.
Lindsay: We want to sit down with a teacher. We focus but we want that balance.
Michelle: Yeah (yes), it makes me think of when I was getting my masters, I

remember I would be in class and you know it would be a lot to take in
and you know it’s challenging of course and when I would get out of class I
would kind of reprocess things.
Lindsay: Mhh hhm.
Michelle: One of the things that I would do was and not even on purpose but just
because I was actually – because I was really interested in what I was
learning.
Michelle: So I would start to explain these things to at the time my boyfriend now
my husband [laughter].

25
Michelle: And I would start to explain them to him and through explaining you know
what I learned to him, I understood it better.
Lindsay: Ooo. That’s another takeaway there.
Lindsay: Is teaching. No, that’s a really good point. So that could be a form of
diffuse learning.
Michelle: Right, right in a certain way because you’re not focused on it in the same
way you’re just telling. Because I would be like let me tell you about this
cool thing that I learned in class today and my brain would kind of say okay
wait how do I explain this and it would make my understanding stronger
so that – I remember that very specifically being excited to talk about
things and then being like oh I understand it better now.
Lindsay: Oh I really like that. So I think what I’m hearing today, you know what our
takeaway is that there is not just one way, it’s just not the way that you
learned when you were in school when you were sitting down with your
textbook and you felt all of that pressure. It’s – you know when you
interact with English it’s not always understanding every word.
Michelle: Right.
Lindsay: There are different ways to interact with it. Try teaching something to
someone else.
Lindsay: Try listening to some music and don’t worry about the lyrics and then
maybe the next time you listen to that song you do look at the lyrics and
you see what they mean and you work through it with a teacher.
Michelle: Right just be you know just try and relax about it. You know I mean.
Michelle: It’s not easy, it’s easier said than done but you know try and realize things
do – something that seems intimidating the first time then it seems so
much easier. I mean with anything in life, I always find oh when I look

26
back on things that I had been really nervous about or had thought was
going to be really difficult, I’m like oh that wasn’t so hard. But I could do
that again but it’s because I did it once so. [laughter]
Lindsay: Yeah (yes), yeah (yes) I mean if I – you could bring in a little bit of Buddhist
wisdom here some things that I think about in my daily life is you know we
can never control what’s going to happen to us so for example if our
listeners are in the U.S. and they’re working in English then they might end
up tomorrow in a very stressful meeting where the native speakers are
speaking very fast and they just don’t understand but you can’t control
that but the thing that you can control is your reactions to that situation.
Michelle: Hmm.
Lindsay: How do you feel in that situation? And the only way to control that is by
getting comfortable around English in your free time.
Michelle: Right, right. That’s so true.
Lindsay: To listen and loosen up and just put on this podcast and don’t try to
understand every word. You know put on Saturday Night Live, the TV-
some TV show and try to understand every word just get used to the
sounds.
Michelle: Hmm. I love that. Yeah (yes) I really like how you put that, Lindsay.
Lindsay: Yeah (yes), that’s great. So guys and again when you – when it comes to
your focused learning we recommend that you use the transcripts so to
get the transcripts for today’s episode go to AllEarsEnglish.com/transcripts
with an “s” on the end and you can download this week’s transcripts
immediately, right away they are ready for you. So Michelle, this has been
good to go into this and I want to hear a little bit more another day about
how you were teaching things to, you know, Dan and how that actually
helped you to learn the things maybe our listeners can learn something
from that.
Michelle: Yeah (yes) for sure. I would love that.
Lindsay: Very cool. I will see you back here next time.

27
Michelle: Okay, bye.
Lindsay: Okay bye bye.
get video one now at AllEarsEnglish.com/insider and if you believe in

28
AEE Episode 504: How To Respond To “What Are You Up To?” In

English
[Instrumental]
Announcer: This is an All Ears English Podcast, Episode 504: “How to Respond to “What
Are You Up To?” in English”
[Instrumental]
million times. We believe in Connection NOT Perfection ™ with your
York City, USA.
[Instrumental]

[Instrumental]

29
Announcer: Today find out the best ways to respond to small talk questions like “How
have you been?” and “What are you up to?” in a charismatic way for
better connections in English.
[Instrumental]
Announcer: If you want to start speaking natural everyday English get “The 100 Most
Common Phrases in English” it’s a free e-book that you can download
immediately, go to AllEarsEnglish.com/100.
[Instrumental]
Lindsay: Hey (Hi) there Michelle, how you doin’ (doing) today?
Michelle: Hey (Hi) Lindsay, I’m good. How are you?
Lindsay: I am feeling good. Happy to be back here at All Ears English recording with
you.
Michelle: Me too, I’m so excited. [laughter]
Lindsay: Very cool, very cool. So we love to give our listeners natural native English
and so today we have a greeting that is super, super natural that one of
our listeners that wrote in and asked about so we’re going to go ahead
and answer that question, okay? And then we are going to – well first I’m
going to read the question but really the expression, Michelle, is “What
are you up to?”
Michelle: Hmm. Okay. Alright. Let’s hear it.
Lindsay: Okay so here’s the question. The person says, “Hi Lindsay and Michelle,
I’m Jan an avid listener of All Ears English from Singapore. I’m
intermediate to advanced and in terms of reading and listening because I
can comprehend – I can understand very well ah to any reading or
listening material that is available but not in speaking. I find myself
struggling in connecting with people during conversations for instance I
have a friend who usually starts a conversation by asking “Hi, how have
you been?” followed by “What are you up to?” almost every time we see
each other. Honestly the second question makes me lose the connection
because I’m not sure how to respond. I understand that it means

30
something like “What are you doing?” but I still get confused. Should I tell
her what I have done in the past few days, what I was doing at the
moment or what I was planning to do in the next few days or weeks? Are
there any other phrases I can experiment with the next time that I’m
asked the same questions?” Okay so that is really the question. I’ll stop
reading here but good question, right?
Lindsay: Yeah (yes), Michelle. Is this a confusing phrase sometimes?
Michelle: I think so but it depends on how you use it but yeah (yes) it sounds a little
bit confusing in this way.
Lindsay: Exactly. Exactly and before we get into this I just want to remind our
listeners, guys and Michelle, we are now offering transcripts.
Michelle: Yes.
Lindsay: The transcripts are back. I know so we used to do this, we used to offer
transcripts then we stopped offering them so the cool thing is if you don’t
quite catch everything that we say today you can go and get yourself the
transcripts and you can do this again. You can listen again with the
transcripts.
Michelle: Absolutely.
Lindsay: So to get that go to AllEarsEnglish.com/transcripts. Okay so let’s start with

this question, “What are you up to?”. Okay what does it mean?
Michelle: Well, it means like what are you doing right now, right? Maybe if the
person sees you regularly right so yeah (yes) that’s what it means.
Lindsay: Yeah (yes). So maybe it depends on understanding what this means

depends on your relationship with the person and how often you see
them, right?
Michelle: Mhh hhm.

31
Lindsay: Because if my friend calls me from Washing – from Seattle and she says
“What are you up to?” she could me right now or she could mean in
general like in your life.
Michelle: Yeah (yes) and I think that’s interesting that you pointed out asking on the
phone because that’s what this phrase makes me think of actually.
Lindsay: Hmm. When someone calls?
Michelle: Yeah (yes), I don't know, yeah (yes) “What are you up to?” like “What you
are you up to?” right now.
Michelle: I don’t necessarily – I feel like “What are you up to?” in person, I don't
know.
Lindsay: Hmm.
Michelle: There’s something about it.
Lindsay: Yeah (yes). I think you’re right. That’s a really good point Michelle, it’s
used more on the phone I think when we call someone or maybe we send
someone a text message.
Michelle: Yeah (yes), because we can’t see them. So.
Lindsay: Yeah (yes), it really just means what are you doing right now.
Michelle: Yeah (yes), yeah (yes). “What are you up to?” Oh I’m talking to Lindsay.
[laughter]
Lindsay: Yeah (yes), so I think one thing – one reason our listener is struggling here
is I think she is over thinking this a little bit, is that fair to say?
Michelle: Yeah (yes), yeah (yes), yeah (yes).
Lindsay: Yeah (yes). We want to be careful not to over think things because that’s
a symptom of perfectionism. [laughter]
Michelle: Right. [laughter]
Lindsay: I’m a chronic over thinker myself so I know how that works.

32
Michelle: Me too.
Lindsay: [laughter]
Michelle: Oh me too.
Lindsay: There are a lot people in my life that are over thinkers actually. Yeah (yes),
it’s an epidemic nowadays, Michelle.
Lindsay: If someone says this to us then how do we answer? So our listeners want
vocabulary for this Michelle, so what do we say?
Michelle: Okay, well I mean you could just say “Oh not much, you?”
Lindsay: Right, “Not much, you?” Instead of “and you” or you could say “and you”
or you could say “you?”
Michelle: Or “What about you?”
Lindsay: “What about you?”
Michelle: Mhh hhm.
Lindsay: Right, we try to keep it as simple and as casual as possible.
Michelle: Mhh hhm. Mhh hhm.
Lindsay: Or you could say, “Oh not a whole lot, what about you?”
Michelle: Right.
Lindsay: We already said that but “Not a whole lot”.
Michelle: Right, right, right.
Lindsay: Or you could tell them exactly what you’re doing.
Michelle: I’m working on right my project, a new podcast episode.
Lindsay: Yeah (yes), I’m just finishing up All Ears English episode 5 something
[laughter]

33
Michelle: [Laughter]
Lindsay: “And you?” Right “and you?” M’kay (Okay).
Michelle: Right, right, right.
Lindsay: What could you say if you’re going somewhere? If you’re in the process of
travelling somewhere – going somewhere?
Michelle: You could say like “Oh I’m off to Spain. What are you doing?” [laughter]
Lindsay: Or “I’m off to the dentist.” Right? [laughter]
Lindsay: “What are you doing, right?” Okay good.
[Instrumental]
Announcer: You listen to All Ears English every day but did you know that we can also
help you achieve your 7 on the IELTS exam? Find out why our strategies
are the most powerful in the entire IELTS world when you get started with
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Lindsay: And what if the person is actually asking more about your life like “What
have you been up to?”
Michelle: Ah yeah (yes), that’s a – that to me sounds more like an in person.
Lindsay: Oh yeah (yes).
Michelle: I don't know.
Lindsay: No, I think you’re right, Michelle. This is more like you sit down and you
have coffee with someone.
Michelle: Right. Right exactly. That’s more like we’re in the conversation “So what
have you been up to lately?” you know?

34
Lindsay: Yeah (yes), actually so these two phrases “What are you up to?” and
“What have you been up to?” are used differently in different contexts.
Michelle: Right, I mean I’m sure there are times when they can overlap but basically
in my mind, I’m thinking somebody would probably say, “What are you up
to?” if they are talking to me on the phone or texting or “What have you
been up to?” like if we are sitting down together, hanging out and we
haven’t seen each other in a little while.
Lindsay: Ooo, I’m glad you said that Michelle that’s a really good point.
Michelle: Thanks
Lindsay: I didn’t think about that when I was writing these ideas but you are right
on, I like it.
Michelle: I mean again I’m sure could use them in either kind of way but that’s the
basic idea for me at least.
Lindsay: That’s the basic idea. That’s go with that. [laughter]
Lindsay: Let’s imagine that we are in that conversation then. We’ve just met with
someone who we haven’t seen in a couple of months and we are sitting
down for coffee at Think Coffee, my favorite coffee café in Boston.
Michelle: Okay.
Lindsay: And what are we going to say? I say, Michelle, “what have you been up
to?”
Michelle: Yeah (yes), um I could say, oh yeah (yes) I’ve been good. I’ve been you
know planning my next vacation or something like that. [laughter]
Lindsay: Now you have travelling on the mind. Right, Michelle, because you just
came back from India. [laughter]
Michelle: Yup (yes), yup (yes), yup (yes).
Lindsay: Yup (yes), yup (yes), yup (yes). So and or you could say something like, you
know, it’s funny because we don’t have to answer this literally. Right? If I

35
say “What have you been up to?” It’s also acceptable for you to say
Michelle, “Things have been good, just getting ready for final exams.”
Michelle: Right, right or you could even say like “Oh not too much” right like.
Lindsay: Yeah (yes). Exactly, “No, not too much, spending a lot of time” you know
preparing for the Boston Marathon or something.
Michelle: Right. Right, exactly. Yeah (yes) “oh not much” I like that.
Lindsay: So there are a bunch of different ways that we can respond to this but it’s
not always exactly a question of – you can answer it in a bunch of creative
ways.
Michelle: Right, right, right, right, right. And I think that a lot of times people say
“oh not much” and then [laughter] it’s always funny it’s like “oh not much”
but this. [laughter]
Lindsay: But this.
Michelle: We just always tend to say “nothing” but really something. [laughter]
Lindsay: Right, because in some ways it’s sort of a greeting.
Michelle: Right, it’s just like oh this is what I’m supposed to say and like it’s kind of
like “Oh everything is fine”.
Lindsay: Yeah (yes), it’s like how are you? I’m fine. But now I’m going to tell you
about how my grandmother is in the hospital and [laughter]
Michelle: Exactly. Exactly [laughter] It’s funny, it’s the craziest thing, you know.
Lindsay: That’s weird yeah (yes). That is a little bit weird. It’s like we want to kind
of warm people up.
Lindsay: You know, it’s just a greeting and then we can get into it if the
conversation goes there but you’re not going to just at the very beginning
of a conversation, you’re not going to say your grandmother is in the
hospital. It’s just out of context.

36
Michelle: Right.
Lindsay: The person is not ready for it.
Michelle: Right, right, right. Of course unless they are very close to you but you’re
kind of – I like what you said you kind of warm up to what’s really going
on.
Lindsay: And I do think that’s a cultural thing. It might be quite different between
American culture and the cultures of our listeners depending on what
culture they are from but that’s just fascinating. I really like that. I think
that’s so interesting. So if you’re confused, you know if you’re sitting
there and you really don’t know what the person is asking about or you
know are they asking about the past, the present, the future, what could
you say Michelle?
Michelle: Um yeah (yes) you could ask them to clarify, right?
Lindsay: Mhh hhm. Yeah (yes), ask them to clarify and how would you do that in
English?
Michelle: Yeah (yes), so you could say “Oh you mean these days?” like “Oh do you
mean these days?” like now.
Lindsay: Right, right.
Michelle: Or you could say “Oh do you mean what am I doing this moment?”
Lindsay: Right, so there’s nothing wrong with asking questions. Don’t be afraid to
ask, guys it’s okay.
Michelle: Right, oh absolutely.
Lindsay: Okay good. Let’s do a situation here, a little role play.
Michelle: Okay. Okay.
Lindsay: So (ring, ring) Hey Michelle.
Michelle: Oh hey Lindsay.
Lindsay: Hey “what are you up to?”

37
Michelle: Do you mean right now, oh I’m getting on the train and heading
downtown. There’s a poetry slam happening at Think Coffee at 4. What
are you up to want to join me?
Lindsay: [laughter] Cool yeah (yes), sure that sound great I’ll meet you there
around 3:45.
Michelle: Awesome, I should have said “what are you up to?”
Lindsay: “What are you up to?” Right, it’s funny I can’t – would you go to a poetry
slam?
Lindsay: Do you go to poetry slams?
Michelle: I know I feel like we just switched places. [laughter]
Lindsay: [laughter] You think I go to poetry slams?
Michelle: Do you?
Lindsay: No [laughter]
Lindsay: No way. [laughter] No, no. I’m a little bit of a hippy dippy but I don’t go to
poetry slams. [laughter]
Lindsay: Alright so there you said, “What are you up to?” And you asked the
question because you were confused, “do you mean right now?” Right?
Michelle: Yeah (yes), yeah (yes), yeah (yes).
Lindsay: M’kay. (Okay)
Lindsay: [laughter] So in the second role play, it’s someone you haven’t talked to in
awhile so we’re catching up here. Okay?

38
Michelle: Okay. Great. Okay. Okay.
Lindsay: Oh hey Michelle, it’s great to hear your voice.
Michelle: I know Lindsay; we haven’t caught up in awhile. So “what’s up in your

life?” “What are you up to these days?”
Lindsay: Oh not much. I’m planning my summer vacation and getting super excited
for that.
Michelle: Oh nice.
Lindsay: “And you? What’s going on with you?”
Michelle: Oh, I just got back from India so I’m just “settling back in”. It was
incredible.
Lindsay: Cool. And I like that “settling in”.
Lindsay: Right that phrasal verb just “settling back in”, that’s very nice just getting
comfortable again at home.
Michelle: Yeah (yes), yeah (yes). Like it’s actually I mean not to get back to this
phone thing but it sounded in both situations like we were on the phone.
Right?
Lindsay: Yeah (yes), yeah (yes) I think in these situations we were. Actually I should
have talked about that in the beginning.
Michelle: Yeah (yes). No, no, no, it’s fine but it’s interesting because you say like
“What are you up to these days?” wait did we also say um yeah (yes)
sorry just interesting that we are on the phone.
Lindsay: No, that’s okay so yeah (yes) these conversations could happen on the
phone, I think in the second role play, you know, because sometimes I
catch up with my friends from college.
Michelle: Mhh hhm.

39
Lindsay: That I haven’t talked to in awhile and we don’t meet in person, right, we
meet on the phone.
Michelle: Right.
Lindsay: But I still say, you know, “What are you up to?”
Michelle: Right.
Lindsay: “What are you up to these days?”
Michelle: Or you could say “What have you been up to?” right? So it’s not that – I’m
kind of actually correcting myself before because so it’s not like you
wouldn’t say “What have you been up to?” on the phone like you can say
that on the phone but it’s more like in a more of a I don't know getting
back in touch kind of way. You know what I mean?
Lindsay: Yeah (yes). Getting back in touch, catching up.
Lindsay: You know we could do another episode on how to catch up with someone.
That would actually be a good episode idea.
Michelle: Mhh hhm. Okay.
Lindsay: You know how to catch up with someone that you haven’t seen in awhile
so we’ll do that in another day. So just hopefully we have clarified if
you’re confused guys um then you want to get the transcripts because it is
hard to get everything that we are – to catch everything that we hear
without using the transcripts. So go to AllEarsEnglish.com/transcripts but
Michelle what is the take away from today? What is the basic take away?
Michelle: The takeaway is you know you really have to think about the context,
right?
Lindsay: Mhh hhm.

40
Michelle: What are they asking you about? Also you want to think about your
relationship with this person, right?
Lindsay: Mhh hhm. Yeah (yes). I think so. And finally don’t be afraid to ask the
person if you’re really confused and that goes for every situation that we
are in.
Michelle: Right.
Lindsay: You know as non-native speakers in the U.S. or in a new country; just ask
there is nothing wrong.
Michelle: Right.
Lindsay: Like people want to help you, you know.
Michelle: And also I mean don’t think that native speakers don’t get confused too,
you know.
Lindsay: [laughter]
Michelle: You know like I might get confused about what my friend is talking about
and so I ask.
Michelle: You know so don’t think oh it means my English isn’t good enough or
something like that because that is not the case. You know sometimes
other people are being unclear.
Lindsay: Yeah (yes) so we want to put the focus back on connection.
Michelle: Right.
Lindsay: So you want to answer that question because you want to get to the topic,
you don’t just want to fumble in your own head and remain perfectionistic
and try to answer it perfectly and miss the connection. Right?
Michelle: Right, right, right. So you know it could be just a miscommunication and it
sounds like with your friend, yeah (yes) you can just ask. You can just ask.
Lindsay: Totally.

41
Michelle: It’s not that your friend is being unclear, I just want to say that.
Michelle: Your friend is great but ah yeah (yes) just you know feel free to ask and
know that native speakers we get confused all of the time about what
other people are talking about sometimes it’s just something gets you
know lost in the connection.
Lindsay: No, yeah (yes) that’s true but this is a really important – these phrases
“What have you been up to?” “What goes going on with you?” “How you
doing?” These are very important small talk questions.
Lindsay: For someone if they want to be charismatic, right, Michelle?
Lindsay: And we just came out with the Charismatic Connector and you guys can
actually get a free charisma master class, it’s a free video lesson. If you go
right now to AllEarsEnglish.com/charisma, you can get started there today
because charisma is so important to our business success. Isn’t it
Michelle?
Michelle: Oh yes.
Lindsay: Yeah (yes) so you can go over and get that guys if you want to become
more charismatic in English. So this has been fun Michelle, thanks for
hanging out with me today.
Michelle: Oh thank you. And thanks for that great question.
Lindsay: Good question to our listener, I believe the name was Jin. Thank you so
much and we are out for today. See you next time.
Michelle: See you later.
Lindsay: Bye.
Michelle: Bye.

42
[Instrumental]

43
AEE Episode 505: Three Ways To Respond To A Funny Joke In English
Announcer: This is an All Ears English Podcast, Episode 505: “Three Ways to Respond
to a Funny Joke in English”
[Instrumental]
million times. We believe in Connection NOT Perfection™ with your
York City, USA.
[Instrumental]

[Instrumental]
Announcer: Today you’ll meet our guest who lives in the funniest city in Japan, Osaka.
He’ll tell us what to say in English when someone says something funny.

44
Don’t just stare at them. Support them to build the connection and learn
how to do it today.
[Instrumental]
Announcer: If you want to start speaking natural, everyday English get “The 100 Most
Common Phrases in English”. It’s a free e-book that you can download
immediately. Go to AllEarsEnglish.com/100.
[Instrumental]
Lindsay: Hey (Hi) Nate, welcome to All Ears English. How are you? Thanks for
coming on the show today.
Nate: I’m doing wonderful.
Lindsay: Good, I’m glad to have you here and so Nate I heard that you are currently
in Osaka Japan teaching English is that right?
Nate: That’s right. I’m in Osaka Japan. I teach at some English schools here.
Lindsay: Very cool. So what is it about Osaka that is so different from Tokyo or
Hokkaido or Okinawa? What’s special about Osaka?
Nate: Well, Osaka is famous for two things. It’s famous for really like homestyle
food and comedy.
Lindsay: Uh huh, comedy.
Nate: So relaxed really kind of funny outgoing people.
Lindsay: Oh cool.
Nate: Mhh hhm.
Lindsay: Cool, I love it. And I think it’s right as you said about the homestyle food,
I’m thinking of okonomiyaki isn’t that famous in Osaka?
Nate: Right so okonomiyaki, I like to call it um what do I call it – something pizza

ah Japanese style pizza – no, no, no – Osakan style pizza.
Lindsay: Okay, so good. So good I love okonomiyaki. I spent some time in Tokyo
and I got to try that in Tokyo.

45
Nate: Mhh hhm.
Lindsay: So the other thing is that Osakans are funny. Right, they are funny. Why
do you think they are funnier than people from Tokyo or people from
other part – what is it about Osaka that makes people funny? What is that
about?
Nate: Yeah (yes), that’s a good question. I think um well there’s not so much
pressure as like living in Tokyo. Like in Tokyo, there are so many people.
Nate: Everyone is always busy.
Lindsay: Yeah (yes), yeah (yes), yeah (yes).
Nate: Osaka doesn’t really have that kind of pressure. It’s just kind of you know
relaxed and um you know there’s – not that many people know about
Osaka truthfully. So it’s kind of like an underground, like hidden um
wonderland actually. [laughter]
Lindsay: Oh [laughter] sounds like you really like it there.
Nate: Oh yeah (yes), it’s great. It’s – yeah (yes) if anyone has a chance to come,
yeah (yes) Osaka is a really, really good place. It’s right next to Kyoto
which is a good sightseeing spot also.
Lindsay: Oh that’s fantastic. I mean I know we have a lot of listeners in Japan that
are listening to this episode today so if they want to come and visit you in
Osaka, will you take them around? If they are living in another part of the
country? They have never been?
Nate: I will make them some okonomiyaki straight from my frying pan.
Lindsay: [laughter]
Nate: [laughter] No, I can’t cook but I’ll do my best. [laughter]
Lindsay: [laughter] Okay that sounds good.
Nate: Yes, I will. I will take them around Osaka, for sure.

46
Lindsay: Okay, cool, cool. So speaking – so a good portion of our audience is from
Japan and then we have listeners from all over the world, Nate, but this is
a common problem all over the world for our listeners, English learners.
The question today is how do we respond when someone says something
funny. And this is one of those nuanced topics that I really want our
listeners to start to learn. They are ready for this kind of topic. This is a
next level topic. Right, Nate? So can you help us with this since you live in
Osaka and you’re speaking in English with people a little bit.
Nate: Mhh hhm.
Lindsay: How do we respond when someone says something funny? What’s the
first thing we can say?
Nate: Okay well, there’s one phrase in the Osaka kind of dialect and they say –
it’s called [inaudible 0:04:37.9] and in English it’s “what are you talking
about?”
Lindsay: Oh.
Nate: So “what are you talking about?” So can you imagine the kind of situation
that you can use this phrase?
Lindsay: Hmm not really. I mean to respond to someone who says something
funny as a response to their joke; I would say what are you talking about?
Is that what I would say?
Nate: Right. So this is kind of specific situation where someone says something
like surprising or just crazy that you can’t even understand and you’re like
“what are you talking about?” “What, come on” [laughter]
Lindsay: Okay, okay. Yeah (yes) I could see that. Yeah (yes).
Nate: You are so surprised and you’re like – kind of like “are you serious?”
Lindsay: I see.
Nate: That might be another way to say it.
Lindsay: Oh I like that.

47
Nate: “Like are you serious or?” or like “no way that can’t be true?” right? It’s
that kind of feeling.
Lindsay: Yeah (yes) so you’re showing your surprise. I like that. I like that. And so
that’s kind of supporting the speaker and showing that you’re surprised
and you’re kind of astounded by what they have said. I like that, okay.
Nate: So ah, sorry, one example would be so my students are in Japan and they
all have Japanese names and I know they are from Japan but at the – in
the first lesson usually they ask me they say, “Where are you from?” and I
say I’m from Santa Cruz California because I’m from California.
Nate: And then really quickly I reply, I say, “Where are you from?” Right. And
they get a little confused and they are like oh I’m from Japan.
Lindsay: Uh huh.
Nate: And like I know they are from Japan, right? [laughter]
Lindsay: Right [laughter]
Nate: So it’s kind of like the reaction to something that doesn’t really make
sense you know.
Lindsay: Okay.
Nate: It’s hard to understand, you know?
Lindsay: And you would say no way, you’re from Japan? Right, it’s the sarcasm
piece.
Nate: Exactly [laughter]
Lindsay: Right?
Nate: Exactly, exactly, exactly.
Lindsay: And I think there’s a deeper piece here, Nate, about sarcasm right in
American humor because you’re from the States. Sarcasm is huge.
Nate: Mhh hhm.

48
Lindsay: You know I wonder if someone from England would have said that or they
would have taken that in another direction and taken a different form of
humor on it, right?
Nate: Mhh hhm.
Lindsay: So that’s another topic for another day that we could go into sarcasm. I
mean that’s huge here.
Nate: Yeah (yes) that one is a little more difficult but umm you can get used to it
if you learn some basic phrases and then you can kind of step up to a more
higher level I think.
Lindsay: Okay. So we’ll go into that another day. So what would be a second
phrase that we could respond to someone who says something funny?
Nate: Okay, umm this one in the Osaka dialect they say [inaudible 0:07:27.1] and
that sounds a little crazy if you don’t speak Japanese.
Nate: Do you know this one?
Lindsay: No, I don’t know this one.
Nate: In English, we would say “that’s right, isn’t it?” “That’s right, isn’t it?”.
Lindsay: Okay. Okay.
Nate: So when someone says something that’s really true and it should be a little
funny too but it’s like 100% true and you’re like yeah (yes), oh my gosh I
knew that but I didn’t say that. It’s like they said something that you knew
was true.
Lindsay: Okay.
Nate: Do you get it a little bit?
Lindsay: But Nate will these phrases work in the U.S. when native speakers are
talking to each other or if our listeners go the U.S. or to England or to
Australia, will these work or are these translations from Japanese?
[laughter]

49
Nate: Oh no, sorry right. These will work anywhere.
Lindsay: Okay just wanted to make sure.
Nate: Again thanks for asking. Umm I use the Osaka words just because I’m in
Osaka but I’m really translating to the natural way that we say in English
so…
Lindsay: Okay good. [laughter]
Nate: I don't know about Australia. [laughter]
Lindsay: Australia I don't know.
Nate: It’s okay.
Lindsay: Okay good. So can you say the phrase one more time for us?
Nate: Right, “that’s right, isn’t it?”
Lindsay: Okay, alright.
Nate: “That’s right, isn’t it?”
Lindsay: “That’s right, isn’t it?” We are really supporting the speaker here. You
know when someone goes and takes as risk to tell a joke or say something
funny the worst things we can to is look at them with a blank face, right?
Nate: Exactly.
Lindsay: We always talk about connection on this show. Connection NOT

Perfection ™ and this is a key moment where we can create a connection
with someone so I like these phrases, Nate, yeah (yes).
Nate: Mhh hhm.
Lindsay: Good.
[Instrumental]
Announcer: Hey guys don’t forget you can get a transcript of today’s episode at
AllEarsEnglish.com/transcripts. See you there.

50
[Instrumental]
Lindsay: So Nate let’s go into number three, what’s the third thing that we could
say?
Nate: Okay so this is the final one. This is like after someone says a really good
joke or a really good story.
Lindsay: Mhh hhm.
Nate: And in Osaka dialect they say [inaudible 0:09:47.5], something like that.
Nate: But what we say in English is “That was a good one.”
Lindsay: Okay that’s like a good one.
Nate: “That was a good one.”
Lindsay: Ah.
Nate: Or also we can say “That’s the funniest thing I have ever heard.”
Lindsay: [laughter]
Nate: Right, “That’s the funniest thing I’ve heard in a long time”
Lindsay: Yeah (yes), yeah (yes). Okay. That’s good. So “that was a good one” “Oh
that was a good one” that sounds very common, something I would say for
sure. Yeah (yes).
Nate: Exactly. Yes. So umm to kind of show how to use these phrases.
Lindsay: Mhh hhm.
Nate: Can I tell you kind of a – hopefully a funny story.
Lindsay: Sure
Nate: Is it okay?
Lindsay: Yeah (yes), okay, sure.

51
Nate: Okay so umm let me start with explaining this is kind of a story about a
funny Japanese toilet situation so in Japan the toilets have lots of buttons
and things to push, do you know about this?
Lindsay: I know I remember. Yeah (yes), [laughter]
Nate: So I just want to tell you that’s kind of the back story for this story.
Lindsay: Okay.
Nate: So I usually go to ah ah kind of a steak restaurant and at this steak

restaurant they have a steak called “Wild Steak” so it’s the name of the
steak, it’s called “Wild Steak” in Japanese it’s called “Wildo” so they put an
“o” after the wild.
Lindsay: Right. Mhh hhm.
Nate: And so I was thinking about going to this steak place and umm but it was
about 5pm and I was going to this steak place around 7 so it wasn’t time to
go yet but I was thinking about – I was excited to get the “Wild Steak”, I
was really excited about the “Wild Steak”.
Lindsay: Right.
Nate: And I went to the bathroom, I was on the toilet and I had finished you
know doing my business, as they say.
Lindsay: Right. Yeah (yes).
Nate: And I looked at the buttons and I kind of I saw the word on the button said
“Wildo”, I was like what? There is a button that is wild like I was thinking
what could this button be, it’s a wild button on the toilet.
Lindsay: Mhh hhm.
Nate: It’s weird right.
Lindsay: Yeah (yes), yeah (yes) that’s strange.
Nate: And so I was no, no it can’t be right so I – anyways I pressed it and turned
out to be the bidet so where they shoot the water.

52
Lindsay: Oh right, right.
Nate: Up at you. [laughter]
Lindsay: Yeah (yes) [laughter]
Nate: You’ve used that kind before, right?
Lindsay: Yeah (yes). Yeah (yes), for sure.
Nate: So it turns out that it didn’t say wild it said mild.
Lindsay: Oh [laughter] “That’s a good one”. [laughter]
Nate: So it was just a mild shot of water but I thought it said wild and I was kind
of excited to see what would happen, you know, may it’s going to shoot
out in all different direction or something.
Lindsay: Yeah (yes), what an adventure. [laughter]
Nate: [laughter]
Lindsay: “That’s a good one, Nate.” “That’s a good one”
Nate: Thank you for using the phrase. Thank you. “So that’s a good one.” You
can’t say “that’s the funniest thing I’ve ever heard” but
Lindsay: Not quite.
Nate: But “that’s a good one”. [laughter]
Lindsay: “That’s a good one”. It’s a cute joke, I like it. I like it. So it’s quite an
adventure when it comes to using the toilet in Japan. We know that so
[laughter] we want to encourage our listeners to visit Japan, what a
fascinating country. My gosh, I just had a blast there.
Nate: Yeah (yes), Mhh hhm.
Lindsay: Yeah (yes) but Nate I’m really glad that we had a chance to have you in
today to talk about how to respond to something that is funny because
this is huge. Again we can’t just stare at someone. We’ve got to support
them and now we have the phrases that we need to do that. So I want to

53
say thank you Nate for sharing those phrases. And Nate you have a
podcast of your own right?
Nate: I do. I have my podcast is called – sorry – it’s called “Nate’s English Lab”
and you can find it in the iTunes in the podcast application also please
come nateenglishlab.com and they can probably find the link to my
website maybe on this podcast page?
Lindsay: Yeah (yes), we’ll put a link to the website – to your website on this
particular page that summarizes this episode. You guys can come back to
AllEarsEnglish.com and find this episode type in Nate in the search bar, go
to this episode and then you’ll find the link to his website that should be
very easy to do. So I want to encourage you guys to go on over and check
out what Nate is doing. Is your podcast in Japanese? Or is it entirely in
English?
Nate: Well, if you’re listening from a country besides Japan, you can understand
my podcast but there is some Japanese so it’s about 90% English, 10%
Japanese.
Lindsay: Okay.
Nate: So umm you can understand most of it.
Lindsay: Okay, very good. Alright. So I want to encourage our listeners to check
out what Nate is doing over there and Nate thanks again for coming on.
This is a good topic. It’s been fun meeting you and chatting with you
about Japan.
Nate: Alright, no problem. It was nice to meet you too Lindsay.
Lindsay: Alright, bye Nate have a good one.
Nate: Bye, bye.

54

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© All Ears English www.allearsenglish.com

Lindsay: It was a long…

Michelle: It was a long time.

Lindsay: Interesting place to be living.

Michelle: Mhh hhm.

© All Ears English www.allearsenglish.com

Michelle: Mhh hhm.

Lindsay: Thank you.

Michelle: Mhh hhm.

© All Ears English www.allearsenglish.com

Michelle: Right, right, yeah (yes) that would be helpful.

Michelle: Right. Right.

Michelle: Yeah (yes), well we are talking about empathy, right?

Lindsay: Empathy, yeah (yes). What is empathy anyways?

Michelle: It’s like feeling the pain of someone else.

Michelle: Um I think I have it a little too much.

Michelle: Sometimes I think it is too much.

© All Ears English www.allearsenglish.com

Michelle: Yeah (yes).

Lindsay: And it sounds like you had a lot of empathy.

Michelle: Yeah (yes), yeah (yes), yeah (yes) for sure.

Michelle: Mhh hhm.

Michelle: Yeah (yes), to say bad things about it.

Lindsay: Yeah (yes).

Michelle: From your mouth. [laughter]

© All Ears English www.allearsenglish.com

Michelle: Yeah (yes), yeah (yes).

Lindsay: Because these insurance companies, I mean they obviously have to be

Michelle: Right, right.

Michelle: Mhh hhm.

Michelle: That’s good.

© All Ears English www.allearsenglish.com

Michelle: Right. That’s true.

Michelle: Mhh hhm.

Lindsay: This kid, he is like a kid.

Lindsay: Like 28.

Lindsay: Yeah (yes), so back like in the fall.

Lindsay: He raised the price of AIDS medication by 5,000%.

Michelle: Right. Right, I remember this.

© All Ears English www.allearsenglish.com

Michelle: Yeah (yes). He is like a young guy, right? Martin Shkreli?

Michelle: Yeah (yes).

Michelle: Mhh hhm.

Lindsay: Michelle what is the first thing that we could do?

© All Ears English www.allearsenglish.com

Michelle: Right, right.

Michelle: Yeah (yes).

Michelle: That’s true.

Michelle: Yeah (yes).

Michelle: Right. Right, exactly.

© All Ears English www.allearsenglish.com

Lindsay: Or “Could I offer you another suggestion?” maybe there is another

Michelle: Right, right. Yeah (yes).

Michelle: Right. Right.

Michelle: Okay. [laughter]

Lindsay: So here we go.

Lindsay: Great, thanks.

© All Ears English www.allearsenglish.com

Michelle: Okay so that we will be $357.89.

Lindsay: What?! For one refill?