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Running Head: SELFLESS EXTRAORDINAIRE 1

Selfless Extraordinaire

Grace Howrigon
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I had composed several drafts of an introduction prior to this, detailed with the world’s

great, historic leaders like Martin Luther King, Jr., Nelson Mandela and Mahatma Gandhi.

Somehow, however, I ended up here on one of my oldest playlists with one most familiar and

influential voice: Alanis Morissette. In the following quote from “Offer,” track 5 on her album

Feast on Scraps (2002), this self-established singer, songwriter, actress and feminist, reminds us

that leadership is a value that originates from within:

How dare I ignore an outstretched hand

How dare I ignore a third world country

Is it my calling to keep on when I’m unable

Is it my job to be selfless extraordinaire

My generosity has me disabled by this sense of duty to offer.

Who am I to be blue?

The relevancy of this quote is rooted in the vulnerability of human nature. Leaders are so

often glorified, and rightfully, but there is more to appreciate than their golden feats. Alanis

wrote “Often” under a grey sky. She wrote an honest sketch of her inclination to feel poor

despite her many blessings, paired with her undeniable obligation to engage those blessings,

inspire and lead. Grey skies test leaders: Morissette, Mandela, and me alike. Leadership is a

challenge unsuitable for the shallow and the lazy. It can only be known by a unique soul, one

who practices patience and selflessness under great pressure, one bold enough to ask, “Who am I

to be blue?”

My senior year of college, I had a bad practice with a noticeably poor attitude. After

practice, my coach, Coach Sue brought the team into the locker room and sat us down. She asked

the team to raise their hand if they were disappointed in me and the entire room raised their hand.
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It was humiliating. She lectured me in front of everyone on how I am the point guard and we

move how I move; they needed and expected more out of me. Leadership draws eyes and

captivates attention. Therefore, in order to see leaders, one must be a leader.

Although only human and imperfect, a leader, even on her off days, must be genuine and

authentic. She must live by the values to which she holds her team accountable. She must

encourage those around her to find and use their voice. She must notice other acts of leadership

and acknowledge them, let them know they have been seen and heard. She must celebrate the

achievements of those around her while maintaining a balance between praise and constructive

criticism. In his model, The 21 Irrefutable Laws of Leadership, author and leader John Maxwell

refers to an old saying, “To lead yourself, use your head; to lead others, use your heart”

(Maxwell, p. 10). A true leader will express her passion in a way that engages the people around

her as, together, they build relationships rooted in common values.

The concept of leadership is very broad, and more of an art than a science. “The personal

styles of superb leaders vary: Some leaders are subdued and analytical; others shout their

manifestos from the mountaintops” (Harvard Business Law). There is no right definition. There

is no certain quality that trumps all others. While brains and degrees often get one the position, it

is the intangibles that allows one to sustain. Throughout my years, I have come to understand

some of the qualities that leave people feeling most inclined and most confident in their

acceptance of another’s leadership. The most genuine of these qualities is passion. Without belief

in the leader who is paving the way, how does one find appreciation for the path? In a Forbes

article titled “Passionate Leaders Aren’t Loud - They’re Deep,” author Erika Anderson explains

genuine passion as “honestly committing to something about which you feel deeply, and staying

committed through difficult circumstances.” She then deems five characteristics indicative of a
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leader’s true passion: honest commitment, a clear (not dogmatic) case, the use of real and

passionate dialogue, supportive action, and continued commitment throughout adversity.

When it’s real genuine passion, those around can feel it and they feed off of it. I think

everyone can relate to this in some way or another. We have all had that coach, boss, coworker,

whoever it may be. The coach who makes us feel small, the boss who doesn’t support our

vision, the coworker who would rather be anywhere else but present. We can also relate to the

opposite; the coach who makes us feel invincible, the boss who encourages our imagination and

initiative, the co-worker who competes and challenges us to do better. It’s finding the balance.

It’s learning who to follow and learn from, then learning how to be the leader yourself and do it

well. It’s like Dr. Lee told us in Drumline, “In order to lead, you must first learn to follow”

(Charles Stone III, 2002).

Leadership has remained, and will remain a work in progress. It is not something I

excelled at overnight, nor would I have come to understand it without examples of both good and

bad leadership in those before me. Coming into college, I thought I had a firm grasp on

leadership. Sure I experienced one’s average trials and tribulations in high school, but it wasn’t

until college that I met adversity face to face. I had my pride, my game, and my attitude

challenged. Collegiate athletics allows for a bigger stage with wider talent; nothing is handed and

everything must be earned. My progress from freshman to senior year of college was drastic. At

the end of my senior year, I received my coaches’ leadership award. I had finally learned to play

our game fearlessly, passionately and selflessly.

The next step for me is to be a Graduate Assistant on the women’s basketball team at

Siena Heights University. In taking on that role, my goal is to allow the combination of who I

have become these past twenty three years to shine through. From my education, my workplace
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experience, the numerous teams I have been a part of, from being a daughter, to an aunt, to a

friend, to a lover; take it all. Understand who I am while I lead you. Join me. I’ll give you my

heart, you give me yours. We will climb mountains together.

References

Drumline [Motion picture]. (2002). United States: 20th Century Fox Film Corporation.

Anderson, E. (n.d.). (2012, June 11.). Passionate Leaders Aren't Loud - They're Deep. Retrieved
from http://www.forbes.com/sites/erikaandersen/2012/06/11/passionate-leaders-arent-
loud-theyre-deep/
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Goleman, D. (2004). Harvard Business Law. What Makes a Leader? Retrieved from
https://hbr.org/2004/01/what-makes-a-leader

Maxwell, J. C. (2007). The 21 Irrefutable Laws of Leadership (10th Anniversary ed.). Nashville:
Thomas Nelson.

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