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TWENTY TOES #1 (modify as needed for local hashing day, etc . ..

) HERE'S TO BROTHER HASHER(S) #10


There’s a game called twenty toes Here's to brother (sister) hasher,
It’s played all over town BALL GAME #4 Bother hasher, brother hasher,
Some folks play with ten toes up Here's to brother hasher,
And some with ten toes down Whip it out at the Ball Game May he chug-a-lug.
Down, down, down, down, down….. Wave it round at the crowd
Dip it in peanuts and crackerjack He's happy, he's jolly,
FATHER ABRAHAM #2 I don’t care if you give it a whack
Because it’s beat your meat at the ball game
He's fucked up by golly,
Here's to brother hasher,
If you don’t come it’s a shame, May he chug-a-lug.
Leader: Father Abraham had seven sons, ‘cause it’s one, two your covered in goo
Seven sons had Father Abraham, at the ol’ ball game So drink motherfucker,
And he never smiled, Drink motherfucker,
And he never cried,
All he did was go like this - With a right! HALF A BRAIN #5 Drink motherfucker,
Drink motherfucker,
Here's to brother hasher,
All (shout/actions): With a right! (extend right I’ve Only half a brain, May he chug-a-lug.
arm) The other half is shit
It comes out by the pound
Leader: Father Abraham had seven sons, Squeeze a little more HE'S THE MEANEST #11
Seven sons had Father Abraham, and it oozes out a bit
And he never smiled, He's the meanest,
And he never cried,
All he did was go like this - With a right! YOUR NOT NUMBER FIVE #6 He sucks the horse's penis,
He's the meanest,
He's a horse's ass.
All (shout/actions): With a right! (extend right Your Not Number Five
arm) Number Four All he does is pound it,
Leader: And a left! Number Three Ever since he found it,
All (shout/actions): And a left! (extend left arm) Number Two He's the meanest,
Your Number ONE He's a horse's ass.
More verses/actions:
With a right! (extend right leg)
With a left! (extend left leg) BIRTHDAY SONG #7 He's always pissing on us,
He's rotten and dishonest,
And a HEEEE! (hump pelvis) He's the meanest,
And a HUUHH! (turn around, drop pants, moon Happy birthday, fuck you, He's a horse's ass.
pack) Happy birthday, fuck you,
Happy birthday, you asshole, So drink it down, down, down . . .
Happy birthday, fuck you.
Drink it down, down, down . . .
MONDAY IS A WANKING DAY #3
HIS ONE-SKIN #12
Leader: Today is Monday!
All: Today is Monday! HER LEFT TIT #8 His one skin hangs down to his two skin,
Leader: Monday is a wanking day! (wanking His two skin hangs down to his three,
motion) Her left tit hangs down to her belly, His three skin hangs down to his foreskin,
All: Monday is a wanking day! (wanking motion) Her right tit hangs down to her knee. His foreskin hangs down to his knee.
If her left tit did equal her right tit, Drink it down, down, down . . .
CHORUS: She'd get lots of weenie from me.
Leader: Are we gonna have a good time? Drink it down, down, down . . . OPTIONAL VERSES:
All: You bet your ass we are! Roll back, roll back,
All: (raise cups over heads and make one Roll back his foreskin for him, for him.
complete turn while humming) Da da dut da da,
da da dut da da
HERE’S TO THE VIRGINS #9 Roll back, roll back,
Please roll back his foreskin for him.
Here's to the virgins ,
Leader: Today is Tuesday!
Their true blue,
All: Today is Tuesday!
Leader: Tuesday is a finger day! (fingering
They are Hashers, INTERNATIONAL HASH HYMN #13
Through and through,
motion)
They are pisspots, CHORUS:
All: Tuesday is a finger day! (fingering motion)
So they say, Swing low, sweet chariot,
Leader: Monday is a wanking day! (wanking
Tried to go to heaven, Coming for to carry me home,
motion)
But they went the other way, Swing low, sweet chariot,
All: Monday is a wanking day! (wanking motion)
Drink it down, down, down . . Coming for to carry me home.
HERE'S TO ________
Chorus
I looked over Jordan and what did I see,
Here's to , Coming for to carry me home,
(now that you've got the idea, here are the rest of
(S)he's true blue, (he's a blue) A band of angels coming after me,
the days)
(S)he's a Hasher, Coming for to carry me home.
Through and through,
Wednesday is a hmmmm day! (stick tongue
(S)he's a pisspot, (he's an asshole) If you get there before I do,
between 2nd & 3rd fingers)
So they say, Coming for to carry me home,
Thursday is a drinking day! (raise glass in salute)
Tried to go to heaven, Tell all my friends that I'm coming too,
Friday is a fucking day! (humping motions,
But (s)he went the other way, Coming for to carry me home.
cheering, happiness)
So drink it down, down, down . . . (repeat with variations: humming and motions
Saturday is a hashing day! (running motions,
cheering, happiness)day of rest only, silence and motions only, double-time)
Sunday is a hashing day (low key, almost quiet)
What a wank, what a wank, what a wank, wank, PUT YOUR LEFT LEG OVER MY SHOULDER
MEET THE HASHERS #14 wank,
What a wank, what a wank, wank, wank. #27
Put your left leg over my shoulder,
Hashers, meet the hashers, WHERE WERE YOU LAST WEDNESDAY Put your right leg over my shoulder,
They're the biggest drunks in history, (wag tongue)
From the, town of Portland, NIGHT? #21 La la la la la, la la la la, la la la.
They're the leaders in debauchery.
Half minds, trailing shiggy through the years,
Watch them as they down a lot of beers,
Where, were you last Wednesday night?
Why did you make us hash all alone? FUCK A DUCK #28
Down down, down down down down,
Down down down down down down down down We search the hills over Looking for flour Fuck a duck,
And you were at home, wanking your bone. A female duck,
Screw a baby kangaroo,
You Fat Lazy Bastards, You weren't even here. Finger bang an orangutan,
Let an elephant eat you,
WHY ARE WE WAITING? #15 So we fucked all the virgins and drank all the
Beer. FEEL the penis of an eel,
WHACK the asshole of a yak,
Why are we waiting, Drink it down, down, down, down . . . MASTURBATE with a gnu,
Could be fornicating (masturbating, etc), That will bring us back to
Oh, why are we waiting, WHY WAS (S)HE BORN SO BEAUTIFUL? Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck . . .
So fucking long, etc . . . Repeat with motions, humming, silence, etc
#22
OUR LAGER #16 Why was (s)he born so beautiful? HEAD CHANT #29
Why was (s)he born at all?
Our Lager (S)he's no fuckin' use to anyone, Head? Who said head?
Which art in barrels, (S)he's no fuckin’ use at all. I'll take some of that!
Hallowed be thy drink. Oooh-rah!
Thy will be drunk, They say (s)he's a joy to his/her mother,
I will be drunk, But (s)he's a pain in the asshole to me, And I did, and it was good,
At home as in the tavern. And there was much rejoicing.
Give us this day our foamy head, And then we fucked. We fucked for hours,
And forgive us our spillages, WHY WAS SHE BORN A BITCH? #23 Uprooting trees, and shrubs, and flowers?
As we forgive those who spill upon us. We fucked like Vikings, with horns on our head.
And lead us not into incarceration, Why was she born so beautiful?
But deliver us from hangovers. Why was she born a bitch? Head? Who said head?
For thine is the Beer, The Bitter, and the Lager, She's no bloody use to anyone, I'll take some of that!
Forever and ever, Barmen. She's only got one tit. Oooh-rah!

SHORT HYMN #17 ZICKY-ZACKY #24 PUT YOUR LEFT LEG OVER MY SHOULDER

The purpose of the zicky-zacky chant is to point #30


Hymn, hymn, (Her, her,) out breaches in circle etiquette - members of the Put your left leg over my shoulder,
Fuck him . . . (Fuck her . . .) circle surround the offender and repeat chant Put your right leg over my shoulder,
loudly: (wag tongue)
SOLDIER SONG La la la la la, la la la la, la la la.
Zicky-zacky, zicky-zacky,
Asshole, asshole, a soldier I will be,
To piss, to piss, two pistols on my knee,
Hoy, Hoy, Hoy!
Zicky-zacky, zicky-zacky, MACDONALD'S FARM #31
For cunt, for cunt, for country and my Queen, Hoy, Hoy, Hoy!
Asshole, asshole, asshole, asshole, Zicky-zacky, zicky-zacky, Old MacDonald had a farm,
A soldier I will be. Hoy, Hoy, Hoy! Ee-ei-ee-ei-oh.
And on that farm he had a whale!!!!!!!!!!!!
Drink it down, down, down . . . . . . and so on until offender completes a down-

THEY OUGHT TO BE PUBLICLY PISSED


down . . . alternatively, the zicky-zacky chant can
be performed whenever someone screws up a DOUGH, RAY, ME #32
ON #18 verse in a hash song (of course, the offending
singer must immediately do a down-down while Dough, the stuff, that buys me beer,
the pack chants). Ray, the guy who serves me beer,
They ought to be publicly pissed on, Me, the guy, who drinks the beer,
They ought to be publicly shot, Fa, a long way to the john,
They ought to be tied to a urinal, ZULU WARRIOR #25 So, I'll have another beer,
And left there to fester and rot, La, I'll have another beer,
Drink it down, down, down . . . Ole, zooma zooma zooma, Tea, no thanks I'm drinking beer,
Ole, zooma zooma chief, And that brings us back to,
Beer, Beer, Beer, Beer . . (etc)
THIS IS YOUR DOWN-DOWN SONG #19 Drink it down you Zulu warrior,
Drink it down you Zulu chief,

This is your Down-Down song,


Drink it down you Zulu warrior,
Drink it down you Zulu chief, chief, chief! SHIT-ON-YA #33
It isn't very long. . . .
Shit on you, shit on you
BIMBO #26 It’s russion for I Love You.
WHAT A WANK #20 If I had my way,
There was a girl who hashed with us I’d shit-on-ya all day,
What a wank, what a wank, what a wank, wank, and BIMBO was her name oh Shit-on-ya, Shit-on-ya, Shit-on-ya
wank, B-I-M-B-O, B-I-M-B-O, B-I-M-B-O
What a wank, what a wank, what a wank, wank, And BIMBO was her name oh
wank,
MRS MURPHY #34 CLOSE TO BREW #39 As the feeling you gets when you humps with a
moose

Take it in your hand Mrs Murphy


Melody - Close to You
For it only ways a quarter of a pound
Why do hashers suddenly appear, HARRIETTES' VERSES:
It's got hair on its neck like a turkey (gobble,
Every time BEER is NEAR?
gobble!)
Just like me, they long to be, Close to Brew,
And it spits when you shake it up and down All my past lovers did brag about size,
Ahhhhh Ahhhh Ahh,
Drink it down, down, down . . . Close to Brew, Those tales of twelve inches were nothing but lies,
Ahhhhh Ahhhh Ahh,
But a moose is the size that a man ought to be,
HE'S GOT A DOSE OF CLAP #35 Down Down Down!
That's why from now on it's mooses for me.

He's got a dose of clap on his dick,


He's got a dose of clap on his dick,
He's got a dose of clap on his dick, Hasher Beer song #40 When I was much younger I read dirty books,
And it goes drip, drip, drip... I stroked myself with each gazing look,
Drink it down, down, down . . . . Melody-Keebler cookie song, with drum roll But nothing can make my eyes start to twinkle,
Than getting it off with that stud Bullwinkle.
BATTLE HYMN OF THE HASHER #36
Oh, you never would believe where this down-
down beer comes from
Melody – Battle Hymn of the Republic It’s made by little hashers in a beer factory Now that I'm older and into my years,
And, what do you think makes it’s flavor so I'll have you to know that I shed no tears,
His eyes have seen the horror of the steepness of uncommon.? While I lay by the fire with a glass of Mateus,
the trail, It’s brewed in filthy toilets and it’s unsani-tary Playing hide the salami with Marvin the Moose.
His ears have heard the whining of the whinging Drink it Down, Down, Down, Down….
Hashers’ tale,
His lips have felt the passing of this nation's finest
ale, This Hasher's done it all! MOOSE SONG #40
CHORUS: Glory, Glory, Ale and Lager! Melody - Sweet Betsy from Pike
Glory, Glory, Ale and Lager!
Glory, Glory, Ale and Lager!
Now drink it down, down, down! CHORUS (SUNG WHILE MAKING ANTLERS
ON HEAD WITH HANDS):

AMAZING BEER #37 Moose, moose, I love a moose,


I've never had anything quite like a moose,
My life has been merry,
A - maz - ing beer, My women been loose,
But nothing compares to the love of a moose.
A taste profound,
a whole keg just for thee!
The pack is lost, When I'm in the mood for a very fine lay
But home you've found, I go to the closet and pull out some hay,
The beer check you can see I open the window and spread it around,
Because moose will come running when there's
hay on the ground.
I DON'T WANT TO JOIN THE ARMY #38
Melody - I Don't Want to Join the Army

HARRIERS' VERSES:
I don't want to join the Army, When I was a young lad I played with the girls
I don't want to go to war, I'd fondle their titties and twirl their curls,
I'd rather hang around Picadilly Underground, But my true love ran off with a classmate named
Living off the earnings of a high born lady. Bruce,
I don't want a bullet up me arsehole, I never got treated that way by a moose.
Don't want me buttocks shot away,
I want to stay in Portland, Women like pearls and diamonds and cars
Jolly, jolly Portland, I spend all my money on them in bars,
And fornicate me bloomin' life away, gor blimey . But a moose is content to be tied to a tree,
.. While I find other mooses to satisfy me.
Monday I touched her on the ankle,
Tuesday I touched her on the knee, Now I've made it with all kinds of beasties with
On Wednesday, I confess, I lifted up her dress, hair,
Thursday I saw you-know-what, I'd make it with snakes if their fangs were not
Friday I put me hand upon it, there,
Saturday she gave me balls a tweak (Tweak! I've made it with walrus, two ducks and a goose,
Tweak!) But I've never had anything quite like a moose
And Sunday after supper, I put the old boy up 'er,
And now she earns me forty bob a week, gor
blimey. Now gorillas are fine for a Saturday night,
And lions and tigers, they puts up a fight,
But it just ain't the same when you slams your
caboose

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