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WHAT? NO ANGELS?

A Musical Christmas Story

The Story:

Paula Powers, a young girl with a successful career in television


returns to her home town to produce a Christmas pageant that will
show the town how good she is and how much she knows. Lisa, a
young girl, who has heard the Christmas story for the first time, asks
to be an angel. She discovers that her poor family has a lot in
common with Mary, Joseph, and the Shepherds. When she hears
that neither these characters nor the angels are part of the show, she
drops out. Paula realizes her error and sets things straight.

The Characters:

Lisa – A young girl, age 7 to 11


Paula - A teenager or young adult with strong singing and acting skills
Mrs. Powers – A woman old enough to be Paula’s mother
Mark – Paula’s younger brother, age 8 to 14, a strong singer
D.J. -- A student, age 8-12
Joan –D.J.’s sister, age 8 -12
Carol – D. J.’s other sister, 10-14
Trouble – A junior high kid who is musical and has musical friends
Pastor – An adult male
Mary – A teenage girl
Joseph – A teenage boy
SixTalented Acts—see director’s notes about the flexibility of these
positions.
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Choruses:

The Shepherds—As few as three, as many as five


The Angels—As few or as many as needed
The Three Kings—Three boys between the ages of 4 and 8, or three
adults

List of Suggested Props:

1. Bulletin board with notices attached.


2. Bible
3. Plastic bag, supposedly brimming over with costumes. The only
one that will be seen is a red furry piece of fabric on top.
4. Clip board
5. Cell phone
6. Briefcase
7. Blanket for the Little Shepherd
8. Manger
9. Bench or stools for Mary and Joseph
10. Gifts for the three kings

Directors Notes:

One of the big scenes in What? No Angels? surrounds an audition for


the Christmas Pageant being held in the story. We are suggesting
commonly known Christmas songs for vocal solos throughout this
story, but the songs in this section provide opportunities. You can
use any song and any special talent your church where you see the
following:

• It’s Beginning to Look a lot Like Christmas


• All I Want for Christmas Is My Two Front Teeth
• Reading of Christmas Story
• Do You Hear What I Hear
• Joyful Joyful
• Twinkle Twinkle Christmas Star
• Dance of the Sugar Plums

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You can have Sunday School classes audition if your church’s


tradition is to feature all the classes. Or welcome specialty acts,
something different than what is suggested. By adjusting the lines
surrounding the solo, the production becomes special to your church!

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What? No Angels?

Rundown

(copy for all teachers, stage hands, lighting, sound, costume and other helpers to make notes on)

OVERTURE

1. Scene 1: Carol, Lisa, D.J., Jane, Lisa


_____________________________________________________
2. Scene 2: Lisa
_____________________________________________________
3. Scene 3: Mrs. Powers, Paula, Mark
_____________________________________________________
4. Audition 1: Boy Singer
_____________________________________________________
5. Audition 2: Girl Singer
_____________________________________________________
6. Audition 3: Boy and Girl Actors
_____________________________________________________
7. Audition 4: Ballet Dancer
_____________________________________________________
8. Audition 5: Junior High or High School Musicians
_____________________________________________________
9. Audition 6: Little Star
_____________________________________________________
10. Scene 3a: Paula, Lisa
_____________________________________________________
11. Scene 3b: Paula, Mrs. Powers, Lisa, Pastor
_____________________________________________________
12. Scene 3c: Paula, Mark, Lisa (voice off stage)
_____________________________________________________
13. Music: Paula & Mark
_____________________________________________________

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Rundown – cont.

14. Scene 4: Lisa, Mary, Joseph, and Shepherds


_____________________________________________________
15. Music: Angel Chorus
_____________________________________________________
16. Music: Shepherds
_____________________________________________________
17. Music: Wise Men
_____________________________________________________
18. Scene 5: All
_____________________________________________________

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Scene 1

(Musical Overture is played which should include parts of three or


four songs from the show. As overture ends, stage lights come up. A
bulletin board stands at center stage. Four students rushing from
school, pull a notice from it as they leave. Lisa is last and she pulls a
notice from it and reads.)

Lisa: Tryouts for the Christmas pageant, at the Presbyterian Church,


will be held on December 20th in the church hall. Anyone interested
in participating in the pageant is invited to try out. I always wanted to
be an actress…( She looks up and scratches her head—looking
confused as she crosses to steps stage right) Hmm. I wonder if
that's about Santa Claus and Rudolph, or the pictures I see on
Christmas cards about angels and shepherds. I've always wondered
about things like that, but I'd feel like a nerd if I asked. (She sits on
top step.) How come everybody else knows and I don't?

(D.J. enters center while, Jane and Carol enter left. D.J. pulls a
notice from the board and speaks from center mike. Jane crosses to
center as he calls her name. Carol holds at mike three, which is at
child height.)

D.J.: Hey, Jane! Tryouts for the Christmas pageant will be held at
church this Friday. And look, the Pageant's on Sunday. That's not
much time.

Jane: This is one year when you don't have to worry. Paula Powers
is going to direct.

D.J: Paula Powers?

Carol: (Nodding) She's Mrs. Powers’ daughter and Mark Powers’


sister.

Jane: Paula's in television in New York. I don’t know what she does
exactly, but she used to work for the Muppets, then Sesame Street.
Mom said she's going to spend Christmas, here, with her parents,

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and she offered to write and direct the pageant.

D.J.: I hope she knows what she's doing. She'll have to pull it
together in a couple of days.

Carol: She knows everything about TV shows.

Jane: With her experience, this will be the biggest and best pageant
this town has ever seen.

Lisa: (Standing so the others notice her for the first time) Do you
have to be able to sing to be in the pageant?

(The children are startled by Lisa's appearance, but recover)

D.J.: Oh, no. Sometimes they have a narrator and all kinds of other
characters. It depends on the pageant.

Lisa: What do you have to do to be in it?

Jane: Well, you have to go to tryouts.

Lisa: Tryouts? How do you know what part to try out for?

D.J.: (Looking confused) It depends on the pageant, but they always


tell the Christmas story, so we have shepherds and angels and
Joseph and Mary--

Lisa: Mary who?

Carol (Shocked) Don't you know?

Lisa: (Looks embarrassed) I know all about Santa Claus, who’s


Mary? Is she Mrs. Santa Claus?

D.J.: Mary's the—But you must know. Haven't you ever been to
Sunday school?

Lisa: (Turns away) No, I haven't. I live with my grandmother, and


she waitresses on Sunday.

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Jane: Doesn't your mother take you?

Lisa: My mother died when I was two.

D.J.: (Exchanges glances with Jane and Carol. They feel concerned,
but don't know how to handle this.) Well--

Lisa: (Turns back.) Can I tryout if I don't belong to the church?

Jane: Of course, you can. Review the Christmas Story and decide
what part you want to play.

Lisa: What Christmas story?

Carol: Don't you know the story of Christmas?

Lisa: I know "The night before Christmas", and I know there's


something else from the pictures on Christmas cards. You know—
shepherds and kings, and Santa Claus—He must be God from the
way the stores promote him.

D.J: No—the real Christmas story isn't like that. You should read it,
yourself.

Lisa: You mean there's a book at the library?

Jane: (Crosses to Lisa). It's in the Bible. Don't you have a Bible?

Lisa: No. But I got a library card!

Jane: We have several. Why don't you walk home with us? We'll
give you a copy.

Lisa: (Speaking as they exit stage right) Will it tell me about the star?

Carol: Nods

Lisa: Will it tell me what the shepherds did?

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Carol: Lisa, it will tell you everything.

(Lights out. Prop people hand Lisa a Bible.)

Scene Two
(Lights up)

(Lisa enters carrying a Good News Bible. She is reading and walks
slowly across the front as she did before.)

Lisa: (She pauses and turns, as if thinking) So that's why so many


Christmas cards have pictures of a barn. I've always wondered about
that. (She turns and walks off reading) There were some shepherds
in that part of the country, who were spending the night in the fields,
taking care of their flock...They had to sleep outside? Maybe they
were poor like me…(continues reading) This tells me everything.
(Lisa Exits)

(Blackout on Stage)

(Prop people remove bulletin board and place a table and chair at
stage right and one at stage Left).

Scene 3

(Stage lights up. At Center Stage Mrs. Powers is speaking to the


children seated in the audience.)

Mrs. Powers: I want to thank all of you for coming to tryouts today,
and I'm sorry for the delay. Paula expected to be here at three, but
she called on her cell phone and said she ran into a traffic jam--

Paula: (Enters from center aisle carrying an enormous plastic bag


full of costumes and a briefcase. Paula is a take-charge person who
speaks with enthusiasm and authority.) It was no traffic jam, it was a
traffic nightmare. (She hugs Mrs. Powers) Hi, Mom! (She glances
around.) Where's Mark? I haven't seen my little brother in over a
year.

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Mark: Here I am, but you call me little brother again and you'll be
sorry.

(He rushes up to Paula and they give a high five.)

Paula: (Looking Mark over.) Boy, have you grown. Seems like
yesterday, that you were this big, and you were in you first Christmas
pageant--

Mark: I'll never forget that. I was three years old. You sang the first
line, then I came in like an echo--

(Music intro)

Winter Wonder Land


Mark and Paula

Mrs. Powers: Paula, what on earth is in that bag?

Paula: Costumes! And in the brief case we have tapes, music,


scripts. We’ve got the greatest little Christmas play. Look-- (She
pulls a red, furry costume from the bag) This is for Cookie Monster.
And I've got Big Bird and Kermit the frog. I've even got--

Mrs. Powers: Cookie Monster. For the Christmas pageant. I must


be getting old…

Paula: Mom, you won't believe this play. Big Bird and the Sesame
Street gang give a Christmas party and invite the Muppets.

Mrs. Powers: But Paula--

Paula: We'll talk later, Mom. Right now, I've got to start these
tryouts. You take the names and the characters I assign everyone
and get their phone numbers. (Mrs. Powers nods, crosses to table at
stage right and sits) And Mark—you want to be my assistant and
help me produce a show this town will never forget.

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Mark: Will you get me a job in New York someday?

Paula: If you grovel and kowtow enough. (She points to stage left)
Set up shop out there in the hallway.

Mark: I can grovel…(exits)

Paula: (Holding a clipboard full of papers, she addresses the


children in a professional manner) Today we'll be doing the casting,
and when you audition, I want you to come up here on stage, so I can
see how tall you are and decide what costume will fit you. I also have
to see if you can be heard when you speak, and if you sing, I need to
get a level on your voice. So, let's get right to work. Now, who wants
to be first? (No one responds) Oh boy, it's not this way in New York.
Up there they fight for the chance. So—(She points to a child in the
first row) I'll choose you, okay?

Boy singer: (Walks to Paula) I wanted to play the part of Joseph!


I’m finally old enough after all these Christmas Pageants! I want to
sing, “A Child is Born This Night.”

Paula: Oh you sing, do you? Here, give this a try.

(Music Intro as child crosses to center mike, scratching his head at


the sheet music. Finally he shrugs and starts singing, but he doesn’t
look thrilled. )

It's Beginning to Look a Lot Like Christmas


(Sung by a child)

Paula: Great. And since there’s no Joseph in this play, you're going
to be Kermit the Frog and sing that song. Now go get your costume.

(Boy Singer exits)

Lisa: (Rises and starts upstage, carrying her book bag, which
contains her Bible) How can you not have Joseph in the pageant?

Paula: Little Girl, raise your hand if you have a question. But do it

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later! Not now—Okay, who’s next?

Lisa: (Sits down stage)

Mrs. Powers: Next we have a girl who would like to be Mary and
sing “Silent Night.”

(Girl Singer enters with a big smile and her front teeth blacked out.)

Paula: Not with that Smile. I want you to be one of the


Muppets and sing this. Want to give it a try?

(Music Intro)

All I want For Christmas is my Two Front Teeth


Girl Singer

Paula: Perfect. Now, go get your Muppets costume.

(Girl Singer exits)

Lisa: (Standing) But you've got to have Mary in the pageant. She
was Jesus' mom, and she really went through it.

Paula: Oh, yada yada! Am I allowed to direct my own show?

(While Paula studies her clipboard, Trouble, in his band uniform,


rushes up on stage and blows his trumpet.)

Paula: (Startled, she drops the clip board, then recovers.) And who
are you?

Trouble: I'm Tram-a-solo-a-me-o, but they call me Trouble.

Paula: No wonder. Do you want to be in the pageant?

Trouble: (Thinks for a minute) Ahhhh—I don't think so. (He exits
to seat down front.)

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Paula: Fine. Snooze, you lose. Who’s next?

Mrs. Powers: Next we have (gives the children's real names.) They
don't want to sing, but they'd like speaking parts.

(Two young children go on stage to Paula)

Girl Actor: I’m a tomboy. I'd like to be a shepherd.

Boy Actor: Me too.

Paula: Let me hear you recite something.

Girl Actor: “And in that region, there were shepherds watching over
their flocks by night. And an angel of the Lord shown around them,
and they were filled with fear. And the angel said…the angel said…”
I can’t remember what the angel said.

Boy Actor: I know (pushes young girl aside).

Paula: Let's hear it.

Boy Actor: And the angel said, “Do not be afraid. Lo, I come to
bring news of incredible joy--

Paula: Good enough, folks. (To Young Girl) How would you like to
be Big Bird? It’s a great part for a tomboy. Big Bird reads the Night
Before Christmas with the help of that mouse who’s not supposed to
be stirring. (She turns to Young Boy) And you’ll be perfect in the part
of the mouse. Now, both of you go in the other room and start
practicing with Mark. (She studies clipboard)

(Young Girl and Young Boy exit)

Lisa: Um, excuse me? (Lisa tries raising her hand, but Paula
ignores her). I like the shepherds. They were all poor and had it
really rough…sort of like me. Don’t you think it’s cool that God would
speak to them, when there were all these rich people hanging around
in Bethlehem, and He could have been a total snob about it—

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Paula: (studies her) Do you want to be an actress someday?

Lisa: Well…yes. How did you know?

Paula: Because you’re very dramatic. But real actors and actresses
have to listen and take a lot of orders. Think you can swing that?

Lisa: (looks confused.) Well…

Paula: Good! I thought so. Sit down. Listen, don’t talk. Who's
next, Mom?

Mrs. Powers: That little girl over there (points to Young Ballet
Dancer in an angel costume). She says all she ever wanted to do
was dance. She wants to be a dancing angel.

Paula: (Flipping pages on her clipboard.) We're not having an angel


in this--

Lisa: (Leaping to her feet.) What? No angels! Why not?

Paula: (Through grit teeth.) Because… I said so!

(Lisa sits.)

Paula: Let’s see what you can do.

Do You Hear What I Hear?


Young Ballet Dancer

Paula: That's perfect. You're going to be the dancing dog that


Grover hires to open the party.

Young Ballet Dancer: A dog…? Dogs aren’t graceful!

Paula: Yeah, but they sell tickets. Go try on the costume and see if
it fits.

(Young Ballet Dancer exits)

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Lisa: (Stands) Hel-lo?? How can there be no angels!

Paula: (Speaking firmly) Angels aren’t part of my concept!

Lisa: But you have to have angels. Angels told the shepherds that it
would all be okay! When they were cold, and grimy, and felt
worthless compared to the rich people, and….didn’t have shower
water! We had our water shut off once…for two whole weeks! You
think that feels good? You think I wouldn’t have loved to have an
angel come down and explain that whole mess to me?

Paula: (Impatiently) Hon. I’m sure you’re joking, and I love your
enthusiasm, okay? I just can’t deal with your noise! Sit. Down.
Now! (Lisa sits, shaking her head that she wasn’t joking. Paula turns
to her mother) What's next, Mom?

Mrs. Powers: We always love when the teenagers show up at


auditions. We’ve got some really good musicians right now.

(Enter teenagers, with acoustic guitars, bongos, tambourines)

Joyful, Joyful

Paula: That was wonderful. Don't change anything. Except the


music! I’ll have something for you a little more rugged…jazzier.

Lead Teenager (to friends): What’s to keep if she changes the


music?

Friend: Is she going to make us dress up in, like, yellow bird outfits?
Pastor promised us we wouldn’t look like idiots…

(Friends shrug in confusion, and they all exit)

(A child dressed like a Star of David enters)

Paula: You look…glittery. And what do you want to do?

Star: I want to be an astronaut. But not yet. For now I have to


pretend to be a star to get to space. So, that’s what I want to be.

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The Star of David.

Paula: Let’s hear you sing.

Twinkle, Twinkle, Christmas Star

Paula: Perfect. You’ll be a star…someday. For now, you’ll have to


be Sesame Street’s Elmo.

(She hands Star a song sheet)

Star: Elmo’s not going to outer space! That’s ridiculous! (Exits,


confused)

Paula: (Studies her clip board) Well, it looks like I've found a part for
everybody.

Mrs. Powers: Not quite. We have one act left.

Paula: (Glancing at audience) Is there anyone who wanted to try out


that we missed?

(Lisa rises, looking nervous)

Paula: (Disgusted) Oh, yes. How could I forget my little drama


queen?

Lisa: I'd like to be the narrator. Of the Christmas Story. I like the
whole, real Christmas Story.

Paula: Wait a minute-- I did forget a character! Miss Piggy!

Lisa: (to the air) Oh great. First, I’m an orphan. Then, I’m a welfare
brat. Now, I find out about these very cool angels and shepherds and
Kings being born in welfare-type places. I felt special for a couple
minutes when I read the Christmas story. And you want me to be a
pig??? Do some things never change??

Paula: (Distracted, pulls Miss Piggy nose from her bag) She's the

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mistress of ceremonies for the show, so it's perfect. Here's your


nose.

Lisa: (She glances down studying the nose for a moment, then
shakes her head) I don't want to be Miss Piggy. She has nothing to
do with who I want to play.

Paula: Our play is about a Christmas Party! It's funny.

Lisa: Some party. Christmas is Jesus' birthday, and you haven't


even invited him. What, was he too poor for you?

Paula: But we're celebrating Christmas with…a party! Listen, I was


born in this podunk town! I know all the stories people tell around
here. I was bored. I couldn’t wait to get out! Now, I’m back. And
guess what? I’m bringing New York back with me!

Lisa: (thinks about it for a moment) Sorry. I don’t want New York.
New York isn’t good enough. I want angels. I want them to tell me it
will be okay for me, too. I want…to feel…loved.

Paula: Loved? (She pauses, as if stumped by that question) Look,


you haven't even read the script.

Lisa: I'm sorry if I bothered you, but I thought a Christmas pageant


would be about love. When God gave us Jesus, that's what he gave
us. Finally. Somebody to love us. No matter how bad things are, no
matter what we do, no matter how many times the utilities get turned
off. (She turns and exits)

Paula: (Staring after her) That is one strange child. (After a pause,
she turns and speaks to the children) Okay, that's all for today, kids.
But everybody be back tomorrow at the same time for dress
rehearsal. (Waving) Thanks for coming.

(Paula goes to the card table and is gathering up her things as Pastor
enters and stands beside Mrs. Powers.

Paula: (Turns, sees Tim and speaks. Obviously pleased with herself)
So, what did you think of tryouts?

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Pastor: Well--

Paula: I thought things went well, except for that kid who made no
sense at all.

Pastor: Lisa.

Paula: Who is that kid, anyway?

Pastor: This was her first time here…I don’t know.

Paula: Well, we're better off without her. But hey, you still haven't
told me what you thought of our first session.

(Pastor Tim and Mrs. Powers exchange glances)

Mrs. Powers: (With a sigh) Frankly, I'm surprised you don't have
Mickey Mouse in the cast.

Paula: Mickey is a Disney character! They’re rights fees are


atrocious!

Mrs. Powers: (Disgusted she slaps her clipboard on the table.)


Business! That's all you care about.

Pastor: It's Christmas, Paula. We're celebrating the birth of our


savior.

Paula: Yes, and we'll be celebrating Christmas in a way that appeals


to children. The kids all know the Christmas story. They hear about
it year after year in Sunday school.

Pastor: Lisa never heard it before.

Paula: Lisa? Look, some kids just have a sad way of looking at
everything. They drag everybody else down—if you let them. I
offered the kid a part. A good one. She snubbed me!

Pastor: Paula, you grew up going to Sunday school every Sunday

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of the year. Lisa's didn't even know who Mary was. She didn't know
where to find the Christmas story, either. The Clark children just told
me they gave her a Bible. That child learned everything she knew
about the Christmas story—alone, in her room probably, and maybe
by a candle because the electric was off. Maybe some kids’ pain
gives them special insight. But look—(He picks up the Bible and
sighs) She left it here. I hope this doesn't mean she won't read the
Bible anymore. She moved here with her grandmother a few weeks
ago, and we don't even know her last name.

Mrs. Powers: Paula, what I heard today didn't sound like a


Christmas pageant to me. It sounded like Paula Powers celebrating
her successful career in television.

Pastor: Paula, you're so involved in costumes that you've missed


the thing that makes Christmas live in our hearts from generation to
generation. That story is alive. It was written for us. It’s as special
now as it was 2,000 years ago, if you can see how it applies to you.
God loves that little girl, and a 2,000-year-old story was what made
her realize it. In spite of all your success, I think you’re missing
something. (He drops the Bible on the table and exits with Mrs.
Powers)

Paula: (Paula stares after them, then waves them off in disgust) Will I
ever learn to stay away from amateurs? In New York, my word is
gospel and—(She breaks off, thinking and picks up the Bible)
Gospel? (She opens the Bible to the bookmark Lisa had left. She
reads thoughtfully)… That night there were shepherds staying in the
fields nearby, guarding their flocks of sheep.

Lisa: (Speaking from off stage in a haunting whisper) …they were


cold, and grimy, and felt worthless compared to the rich people,
and….didn’t have shower water!

Paula: Suddenly, an angel of the Lord appeared among them, and


the radiance of the Lord’s glory surrounded them. They were terrified.

Lisa’s voice: We had our water shut off once…for two whole weeks!
You think that feels good?

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Paula:….but the angel reassured them. “Don’t be afraid,” he said.

Lisa’s Voice: You think I wouldn’t have loved to have an angel come
down and explain that whole mess to me?

Paula: “I bring you good news that will bring great joy to all
people…”

Lisa’s Voice: I felt special for a couple minutes when I read the
Christmas story.

Paula: All people…

Lisa’s Voice: I felt special…

Paula: All people…

Mark: (Enters) Don’t tell me. My sister is reading a Bible. What’s up,
sister?

Paula:…For unto you is born this day in the city of David, a Savior…
(Puts hand on Mark’s after he lays it on her shoulder).

Lisa’s Voice:…whose name is Christ the Lord…

Paula: A very wise, old theatre director tried to warn me about


myself recently. He showed up on one of my sets. I was bragging to
him about some award I’d just won. He interrupted, and said, “Paula,
keep it simple.”

Lisa’s Voice: And this shall be a sign unto you:

Paula: He said I’d end up a lot happier if I quit trying so hard to be so


hip and new and grand…and went after the simple things in life.

Lisa’s Voice: You will find a babe wrapped in swaddling clothes,


lying in a manger…

Paula: And then he left.

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Mark: (Pulls her out of the chair) Sing with me like you used to when
nobody was looking. Betcha you didn’t hate it as much as you think
you did…

(Intro music under as they walk to center mike and sing)

The Gift of Love


Tune: Amazing Grace
(Coined Words)
< < < <
On Christ-mas Eve so long a-go
< < <
A star shown bright a-bove.
< < < <
It was a sign to all man-kind

< < <


God sent his gift of love.
< < < <
2. The real-ms of an-gels praised his name.
< < <
The news they did im-part.
< < < <
At Christ-mas time and all the time
< < <
Keep God's love in your heart.
< < < <
2. God sent His son, the ho-ly one
< < <
To drive all sin a-way,
< < < <
And peace on earth would hail his birth,
< < <
And love reign ev-ery day.

Paula: (She stands thinking during applause, then grabs the clip
board her mother has left on the table, pulls a cell phone from her
purse and speaks while dialing) So, brother. Shall we collaborate?

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Mark: Sure. On what?

Paula: On a real Christmas show…

(Lights out. Prop people remove card tables and chairs, but leave the
chair at Stage Left for the narrator to sit on during the shepherds’
scene. They set the manger scene at Stage Right, and a large rock at
Center Stage. It should be up stage far enough for the shepherds to
hide behind it when the angels appear.)

Scene Four
(Lights Up)

(Music under as Mary and Joseph go up on stage. Mary sits on a


stool beside the manger. Joseph stands behind her. Lisa at Stage
Left narrates as they walk.)

Lisa: So this guy, Emperor Augustus ordered a census, which was a


real pain. Joseph and Mary had to get to Bethlehem, in Judea, from
way far away, miles and miles down this muddy, dirty, disgusting and
endless road. And Mary was pregnant. And wouldn’t you know?
She’s thinking she could get somewhere that’s four-star, or even
three-star! before this baby starts coming. No way. She’s just like
the rest of us. No breaks for her in the here-and-now. There was no
room for them in the inn, so she can hardly believe it, but she’s
having this baby in the straw, out in the barn, and there’s this cow
breathing right in her face! No diapers. No bed linens. No nothing,
boy, she sounds like my mother. I was born in the back seat of a
New Jersey Transit bus about nine blocks from the hospital. Then,
Mary wrapped her baby in…whatever. My mom wrapped me in the t-
shirt of some guy two seats in front of her. And Mary laid him in a
manger.

(Stage lights out. Music continues under. Shepherds take their place
at stage center.)

Lisa: However, some people out there would have understood how
a thing like this could happen. There were some shepherds in that
part of the country who had to sleep outside so their sheep wouldn’t

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What? No Angels! Page 23

get ate by wolves. Poor guys…wasn’t anybody worried some wolf


might eat up them?

(Lights up on Shepherds, sleeping around rock)

Shepherd 1: (Awakens, stretches, walks to mike 3 shielding his


eyes. He points to the star.) Hey, everybody, wake up. Look at that
star.

Shepherd 2: (Crosses to mike 2 shielding his eyes) I've never seen


one so bright.

Shepherd 3: (Crosses to mike 3, staring and shielding his eyes) It


must be some sort of message.

Shepherd 4: (Crosses to mike 2) It's kind of frightening, isn't it?

Shepherd 1: Yes, and it means something. I think something


important is about to happen.

(Music loud as angel 1 enters and holds at mike 3)

(Shepherds run away and hide behind rock)

Angel 1: Don’t be afraid! I bring you good news, which will bring
great joy to the entire world. For unto you, in the City of David, a
savior is born, and he is Christ the Lord.

(All Angels enter)

Angels: Glory to God in the highest and on earth, peace and good
will toward men.

The First Noel


Angel Choir

Angel 1: (Pointing to Star) This will be your sign: You will go to


Bethlehem, and there you will find a baby wrapped in swaddling
clothes, lying in the manger.

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What? No Angels! Page 24

(Angels exit)

(Silence - Shepherds look at each other in disbelief. Then rise and


move to Center Stage staring after angels)

Shepherd 1: I don't believe it. Did I just dream that?

Shepherd 2: No way. We all saw it. And heard it, too. A savior has
been born. Christ the Lord.

Shepherd 3: But of all the people in the world, why would we be the
ones the angel would tell? We're not important. We're just (smells
his armpit and grimaces) shepherds.

Shepherd 4: You know what? If we don’t at least go to Bethlehem,


then we are really stupid.

Shepherd 1: The angel said the star would be a sign, and we would
find the babe wrapped in swaddling clothes lying in the manger. Let's
go…see what happens.

Silent Night (Verses 1 & 2)


Shepherds

(After second verse they cross to manger. Lisa speaks while they
walk)

Lisa: So they couldn’t believe any of this. An angel, coming to


them? Who’d have thought. But they hurried off and found Mary and
Joseph, and they saw the baby lying in a food trough for the sheep
and cows. Then they told them what the Angel had said about the
child.

(Shepherds take places at manger)

(Music under. We three kings.)

Lisa: Then, wise men from the east saw the star. They were all,
“Woe,” because they couldn’t believe it finally happened. So they got

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What? No Angels! Page 25

all these weird, Wise-men gifts together, they followed the star until it
led them to the manger. They were probably grossed out by the
accommodations, but whatever. They were happy to see the baby.

We Three Kings
(Three Kings)

Lisa: Christmas is a simple story for simple people who want the
simple truth: God loves you. He cares enough to become like you—
no matter how big your troubles seem. And that's what Christmas is
all about.

(Entire cast sings the Gift of Love as they take their places on stage
for the finale)
The Gift of Love
Entire Cast

(At the end of the song all bow)

(Piano, plays "Deck the Halls" as cast comes to Center Stage, in


assigned order, to take their bows and exit.)

- end -

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