Table of Contents

HYPERLINK "http://members.picknicksbrain.com/members/helpyour-child-sleep/introduction"Introduction HYPERLINK "http://members.picknicksbrain.com/members/helpyour-child-sleep/sleep-needs"Sleep Needs HYPERLINK "http://members.picknicksbrain.com/members/helpyour-child-sleep/newborn-day-night-confusion"Newborn Day/Night Confusion HYPERLINK "http://members.picknicksbrain.com/members/helpyour-child-sleep/tips-to-increase-newborn-sleep"Tips to Increase Newborn Sleep HYPERLINK "http://members.picknicksbrain.com/members/helpyour-child-sleep/ideal-bedtime"Ideal Bedtime HYPERLINK "http://members.picknicksbrain.com/members/helpyour-child-sleep/logging-sleep"Logging Sleep HYPERLINK "http://members.picknicksbrain.com/members/helpyour-child-sleep/naps-and-schedules"Naps and Schedules HYPERLINK "http://members.picknicksbrain.com/members/helpyour-child-sleep/shifting-schedules"Shifting Schedules HYPERLINK "http://members.picknicksbrain.com/members/helpyour-child-sleep/sleep-routines"Sleep Routines HYPERLINK "http://members.picknicksbrain.com/members/helpyour-child-sleep/sleep-associations"Sleep Associations- Is it harmful to rock your baby? HYPERLINK "http://members.picknicksbrain.com/members/helpyour-child-sleep/when-to-sleep-train"When to Sleep Train HYPERLINK "http://members.picknicksbrain.com/members/helpyour-child-sleep/how-to-sleep-train"How to Sleep Train HYPERLINK "http://members.picknicksbrain.com/members/helpyour-child-sleep/sleep-training-methods"Sleep Training Methods HYPERLINK "http://members.picknicksbrain.com/members/help-

your-child-sleep/why-sleep-training-is-not-cry-it-out"What is Cry-ItOut and Why Sleep Training is NOT Cry-It-Out HYPERLINK "http://members.picknicksbrain.com/members/helpyour-child-sleep/crying-during-sleep-training"Crying During Sleep Training HYPERLINK "http://members.picknicksbrain.com/members/helpyour-child-sleep/nap-training"Nap Training HYPERLINK "http://members.picknicksbrain.com/members/helpyour-child-sleep/night-weaning"Night Weaning HYPERLINK "http://members.picknicksbrain.com/members/helpyour-child-sleep/transitioning-from-co-sleeping-tocrib"Transitioning From Co-Sleeping to Crib HYPERLINK "http://members.picknicksbrain.com/members/helpyour-child-sleep/transitioning-from-crib-to-toddlerbed"Transitioning From Crib to Toddler/Twin Bed HYPERLINK "http://members.picknicksbrain.com/members/helpyour-child-sleep/toddlers-in-big-beds-getting-up"Toddlers in Big Beds- The Jack in the Box HYPERLINK "http://members.picknicksbrain.com/members/helpyour-child-sleep/the-toddler-staller"The Toddler Staller HYPERLINK "http://members.picknicksbrain.com/members/helpyour-child-sleep/the-early-rising-toddler"The Early Rising Toddler HYPERLINK "http://members.picknicksbrain.com/members/helpyour-child-sleep/where-do-i-start"Where Do I Start? What Steps Do I Take? HYPERLINK "http://members.picknicksbrain.com/members/helpyour-child-sleep/concluding-remarks"Concluding Remarks HYPERLINK "http://members.picknicksbrain.com/members/helpyour-child-sleep/appendix-a-faq"Appendix A- FAQ HYPERLINK "http://members.picknicksbrain.com/members/helpyour-child-sleep/appendix-b-quick-age-reference"Appendix BQuick Age Reference (What to Expect, When)

HYPERLINK "http://members.picknicksbrain.com/ help-your-childsleep/introduction/"Introduction

Unfortunately, we cannot make our children sleep. You may have heard the saying We can lead a horse to water, but we cant make him drink. Well, we can lead our children to their crib or bed, but we cannot make them sleep! We can only provide the opportunity for sleep and help them learn the skills we all need to sleep well. Sometimes, all we need to do, as parents, is get out of their way and the rest will come. Sometimes we, parents, perpetuate the very habits

we want to break. While some babies only need a slight encouragement, others will need very firm limits and lots of consistency. And, then there are all the children in between. This e-Book will help you tackle the most common problems babies and children have when it comes to sleep in the first few years of life. With the topics covered in this guide, you should be able to get to the heart of what you really need to know to solve some of your sleep problems. This guide may not be a cure-all as everyones situation is unique, but you should be able to develop a great foundation, if not solve most of your problems. What works for you may not work for someone else and what works for many might not work for you! I hope this guide will begin to pave the way for you and your family to get more sleep. Healthy sleep habits are very important for all of us. The same way sleep deprivation and sleep fragmentation is hard on you, it is hard on your child. Well-rested babies make happy babies and well-rested parents make happy parents and happy parents make better parents. Lets get started on helping your child sleep!

HYPERLINK "http://members.picknicksbrain.com/ help-your-child-sleep/sleep-needs/"Sleep

Needs HYPERLINK "http://members.picknicksbrain.com/help-your-childsleep-step-by-step"Help Your Child Sleep Table of Contents Babies and young children need a lot of sleep. Many people are surprised by how much they need and think if they let them nap

during the day, they wont sleep at night. On the contrary, keeping your baby up will lead him to be overtired and when we are overtired, our body releases hormones to fight fatigue (think second wind). Ideally, if you avoid letting him get overtired, babies tend to sleep more restfully (i.e. less night-wakings) and sleep longer. Many people think if you keep your child up until 9pm or later, they will sleep later in the morning and then are frustrated when this doesnt happen. Or, the child does sleep until 7am, but has only gotten 10 hours of sleep when he really needs 12 and is missing out on 2 full hours of sleep every night. The average amount of sleep in 24 hours that babies and children need: 6 months and younger: 11-12 hours at night, 3-4 hours during the day in 3-4 naps. 6 to 9 months: 11-12 hours at night, 2-3 hours during the day in 2-3 naps 9 to 18 months: 11-12 hours at night, 2-3 hours during the day in 12 naps 18 months to 3 years: 10-12 hours, 1 nap 3 to 5 years: 10-11 hours, sometimes 1 nap (most lose the nap between ages 3 & 4) 5 years+: 9-10 hours, no nap Adequate sleep helps your baby in many ways and inadequate sleep has been shown to lead to a multitude of problems. Here are just a few reasons to help your child sleep enough: Learning and Memory Children who get enough sleep seem to learn more rapidly than those who are tired. Have you ever tried to learn something new when youre tired? Its hard! Babies and toddlers learn a vast amount of information in a short amount of

time. Safety Similar to how it is dangerous for you to drive in a severe sleep-deprived state, it can be more problematic for your baby to go up and down stairs, ride his tricycle, etc when he has not slept enough. I always notice my boys are clumsier when they are tired. Mood This is a big one for a lot of people. While some children wont get too cranky, some get downright monstrous. Behavior problems have been linked to sleep deprivation. Illness Your bodys immune system has more trouble fighting off illnesses when it hasnt gotten enough rest. Obesity A Harvard study concluded that too little sleep in babies and toddlers might be linked to obesity. Our bodies release hormones leptin and ghrelin to signal to our body we are full and hungry, respectively. When we dont sleep enough, leptin levels go down and when you get a spike of ghrelin, you will get hungry and most likely, eat, when you should be sleeping. Depression Studies are now finding that it was once thought that sleep problems were a symptom of depression, but they are now considering that sleep problems may precede depression. In other words, if you begin to have substantial sleep problems, The American Academy of Sleep Medicine (AASM) strongly recommends that you urgently go see a sleep specialist. Depression is the most common form of mental health problem and it now considered as common in children as it is adults. Each year 17 million people suffer from depression and as many as 1 in 33 children may have depression. Now that we know how much sleep your child needs and just a few reasons as to why its important, lets see what we can do about

improving your childs sleep!

HYPERLINK "http://members.picknicksbrain.com/ help-your-child-sleep/newborn-daynight-confusion/"Newborn Day/Night Confusion

Although you might be tempted to keep things quiet and darker for your newborn to nap well, it might prolong the day/night confusion that almost all newborns will have. Day/Night confusion can last up to 6 weeks. When she was in moms belly, moms movements lulled her to sleep and when mom was resting, shed have a party. When she comes out, she doesnt know she should act in the complete opposite fashion. This is tiring for the parents, to say the least. Keep days bright and upbeat and nights, dark and boring, and it will help her sort out her days and nights faster. This might be more than you want to know, but light is what cues our eyes to tell us to stay awake or whether its time to sleep. Baby will sort this out on his own, eventually, but to encourage it to happen faster, try to keep baby awake for about 30 minutes after daytime feedings, and limit naps to 2-3 hours (baby should eat every 3 hours, at least, anyway). If you are swaddling your baby, you may also consider swaddling only at night, temporarily, until baby has sorted out day and night and then resume swaddling for naps and nights. Baby should adjust fairly quickly using these techniques.

HYPERLINK "http://members.picknicksbrain.com/

help-your-child-sleep/tips-to-increasenewborn-sleep/"Tips to Increase Newborn Sleep

HYPERLINK "http://members.picknicksbrain.com/help-your-childsleep-step-by-step"Help Your Child Sleep Table of Contents You should know that it can be dangerous for a new newborn (from one to a few weeks old) to sleep all night. They really do need to eat approximately every 3 hours in those early days so they can grow well and thrive. It is also safest to place baby on his back to sleep, to guard against SIDS. You may be want to review other ways to lower SIDS risks by reviewing this HYPERLINK "http://www.nichd.nih.gov/publications/pubs/safe_sleep_gen.cfm" \n _blankarticle. It is also not recommended to allow a newborn to sleep in a car seat. Read more HYPERLINK "http://www.medicinenet.com/script/main/art.asp?articlekey=78008" \n _blankhere. Please keep in mind that, although it is exhausting, there is not much you can do with a newborns sleep patterns in terms of training until 3-4 months old, at the very least. Their brains need to mature. It is a big adjustment coming out into the world from the womb. I personally dont recommend any type of training until 14-16 weeks old (every parent must decide the right time for her baby). But, here are a few tips to make the newborn transition at least a little easier. 1. Short Wake-time The first week or so, your baby will most likely hardly be awake, but after the first week or two, the #1 key with your newborn is to keep wake times very short, at first. You should soothe your baby for

sleep after just 1-2 hours of wake time TOPS. You should look for signs that she is getting sleepy and start soothing her. If you wait until she is fussy, cranky or crying, you are actually too late! An overtired baby will have more trouble settling down and going to sleep and staying asleep. My boys always fell asleep easiest when I caught them before they started to fuss and cry. Some babies are much more sensitive to being overtired than others, so while others will barely notice their child get sleepy before she drifts off to sleep, others will begin to realize just how in tune with their baby they need to be! By wake time, I mean to include feedings and diaper changes and disregard how long her last nap was. For example, little Suzie starts to nap at 8am and sleeps for 3 hours. She eats at 11am and you change her diaper. Now, its 11:30 and you decide to give her a bath. At 11:45, she is fussy. She is already overtired and she needs a nap! In the beginning, they cant go long before getting tired and overstimulated. 2. Swaddle To help mimic the feeling of the womb, it helps to swaddle your baby. This basically means to wrap him up in a blanket like a little burrito. You may have seen them do it at the hospital. This helps him feel safe and secure and also helps him stay asleep during any Moro reflex (or startle reflex) moments. It is said that those reflexes are similar to how we have the feeling we are falling while falling asleep. It can take up to 4 or 5 months for your baby to stop the startling. I highly recommend The Miracle Blanket, which you can find at HYPERLINK "http://www.miracleblanket.com/" \n _blankwww.miracleblanket.com (no affiliation with Pick Nicks

Brain). It is a little pricey, but so easy to use and so hard for your baby to break out of. 3. Co-sleeping Sometimes it helps to have him in the room with you for quick access for middle-of-the-night feedings and diaper changes. This also can help give him more comfort being close by as he will be able to hear and smell you. For safety reasons, you should use a CoSleeper , sleep positioner , or bassinette , rather than have baby in bed with you. I used the second one with my second son and then I moved it into his crib for a seamless transition to his crib. We were able to remove it a few weeks later. 4. Angle the mattress For babies who spit up a lot or have reflux, it helps to angle the mattress, so baby is not flat on his back. Youll want to angle the mattress so his feet are lower than his head, so his stomach contents can stay put. To angle the mattress, you can simply change the support platform level on one side on most cribs. If that is not feasible, you can put blankets and pillow under the mattress. Please note that the mattress should still remain flat at all times, just at an incline. You must make sure that you do not tilt the mattress so much that your baby slides down the bed, either. I strongly recommend that you first check with a knowledgeable health care provider to make sure that what you do is best and safest for your child. I only wanted to highlight the idea. 5. White Noise White noise is made up of the sounds like a fan whirring, vacuum cleaner, hair-dryer, etc. It helps a newborn sleep because inside moms womb was all white noise. The sound of her blood flow,

heart beating, etc. Thats why he may find comfort when you may run the vacuum cleaner. My son used to love when I turned on the blow-dryer. Of course, you cant run the vacuum all day, so I recommend getting a White Noise machine , sound machine or a White Noise CD . I have two white noise machines, one in each boys room, so they dont wake each other and they work like a dream! 6. Wear baby For particularly fussy babies or just for parents convenience and snuggling, it helps to wear baby using a sling. They get very folded up in a sling, but again, it mimics the womb and babies love it! I didnt use a sling with my first, but used a BabyBjrn Baby Carrier and loved it! It really helped me walk off the baby weight, which was a bonus. But, with my second, I did use a sling (there are many out there!) and my son would fall asleep in less than 5 minutes until he grew out of it. This helped tremendously when I needed to cook dinner and do stuff with my toddler, at the time. I have also heard good things about the Moby Wrap and the Maya Wrap . Read here for HYPERLINK "http://www.wearsthebaby.com/babywearing/tenreasons.html" \n _blankten reasons to wear your baby. 7. Swing As I said earlier, moms movements lulled baby to sleep while in the womb, so I also recommend trying a swing, but dont be surprised if she only likes it at high speeds. Our family teased us we were making our first son drunk, but he just loved it going FAST and it was the only way hed fall asleep in it! My friend has the FisherPrice Ocean Wonders Aquarium Cradle Swing and loves it. They didnt have that when I was shopping for one!

Unfortunately, some of these tips do create sleep associations (see below), which is what we ultimately want to avoid! But, during the first weeks, you really do what you can to survive and sometimes its just the luck of the draw as to whether you have an easy or hard sleeper. Obviously, it never hurts to try to put your baby down to sleep without any of these tricks, but it just doesnt work for all of us, which is what brought you to my site. For additional product recommendations, please visit HYPERLINK "http://picknicksbrain.com/resources for additional resources" \n _blankhttp://picknicksbrain.com/resources for additional resources and HYPERLINK "http://picknicksbrain.com/recommendedsites" \n _blankhttp://picknicksbrain.com/recommended-sites for other website recommendations.

HYPERLINK "http://members.picknicksbrain.com/ help-your-child-sleep/idealbedtime/"Ideal Bedtime

An early bedtime does not happen until your baby is around 7-8 weeks old. At that point, ideally, bedtime should be between 6 & 8 p.m. for your childs first 2-3 years. For younger babies under 4 months old, typical bedtimes are usually between 6 & 7 p.m., depending on when the last nap ends. Many parents have been excited to see when their child is waking up at 5am and they simply make bedtime earlier, their child then sleeps later in the morning. It is very counter-intuitive, but its true and it works. And, their babies

are refreshed and rested and are usually in a much better mood. Adequate sleep is instrumental in a childs development and they are better able to learn new skills when they are well-rested. In my experience, the most misunderstood fact when it comes to a babys sleep is the idea that you should keep your baby up longer to get more sleep out of her. This does not promote more sleep. In fact, many times it creates less! It is very counter-intuitive, but sometimes the only thing standing in the way of a better nights sleep is an earlier bedtime. Although it is hard for many parents to accept, I promise this is true. Obviously, this only rings true to an extent. You cannot expect to put your child to bed at 5 p.m. and expect him to sleep until 7 a.m. the next morning. During nap transitions (from 4 to 3, 3 to 2, or 2 to 1), sometimes a baby will sleep extra long at night, though. My own son slept 13 hours straight during his transition to 1 nap and then when he stopped napping all together. I just would never expect that regularly. The primary goal of the early bedtime is that he is not overtired and will have a more restful sleep. Thus, it is important not to force bedtime to be later simply to achieve a later morning wake-up. Not only does it not always work, it sometimes has the opposite effect making baby wake earlier in the morning and not sleep as restfully. An overtired baby will have more trouble falling asleep and, most importantly, staying asleep. For information on shifting schedules, please see HYPERLINK "http://members.picknicksbrain.com/members/help-your-childsleep/shifting-schedules"Shifting Schedules. The problem with a too-late bedtime and your child becoming overtired is when we are overtired (adults included), our bodies

release hormones to fight fatigue. This makes it hard for us to settle down and relax and sleep well. This is especially true for your baby. The second part of the too-late-bedtime problem is that babies, biologically (its in their nature!), tend to be early risers in the early days. The world is an exciting place and the first sign of daylight, they want to explore! Dont worry. One day he will be a teenager and you will have to drag him out of bed! But, for now, this means that regardless of bedtime, you may not get to sleep in like you did before you had kids.

HYPERLINK "http://members.picknicksbrain.com/ help-your-child-sleep/loggingsleep/"Logging Sleep

It is a good idea to keep a log of your babys sleep for one or two weeks (see Appendix D for sample logs). Log wake times, nap times, nap lengths, and bedtime. Add up the total time baby actually slept (if you are unsure, as long as baby is quiet, count as sleeping). The amount of sleep a child gets in 24 hours stays relatively constant and they will shift sleep from day to night and vice versa (within reason). Once you have your log, you can take the average amount of sleep in 24 hours and use that as a guide when adjusting schedules and setting your expectations on wake-times. For example, if you know your baby gets an average of 13.5 hours in 24 hours and naps 3 hours that day, you can estimate he will sleep about 10.5 hours that

night. You will likely need to log 1-2 weeks every few months to get an accurate average, as babies change a lot in the first 2-3 years! Disclaimer: Some babies are more consistent than others. Inconsistent babies might have a large range of the amount of sleep in 24 hours (mine had a swing of as much as 2 hours a day!). At least if you keep a log, you know whether this is true or not. Disclaimer 2: During growth spurts, teething and illnesses, the amount of sleep might be unusually higher or lower. Try to time your logging during a normal time. (As much as a baby is normal)

HYPERLINK "http://members.picknicksbrain.com/ help-your-child-sleep/naps-andschedules/"Naps and Schedules

Naps are an important component of sleeping through the night. It seems strange, but the better the baby naps during the day, the better night sleep can be. The less likely she is overtired come bedtime, the better she can settle down and sleep better all night. She wont be as restless and wont have as many night-wakings. Many people think they should limit naps, so they will be more tired at night. This often backfires. They might crash due to exhaustion, but most likely will either not sleep restfully, waking often, or will wake too early in the morning. Before your baby is on a schedule, nap your baby according to sleepy cues (staring off into space, less active, and yawning) and avoid overtired cues such as crankiness and eye rubbing. Once they

are fussy, you are already too late! Overtiredness is the chief culprit of short naps in a child younger than 9 months old. After 9 months of age, short naps could be caused either by overtiredness or he needs a longer wake time before his nap. Only experimentation can sort out which one it is. Very rarely is more wake-time the solution for short naps in a younger baby. A restorative nap is considered any (non-moving) nap longer than 1 hour or more. Short naps (30-45 minutes) are common up through 6 months of age when their sleep systems become more mature. If your baby doesnt lengthen her naps on her own, you may need to encourage her to do so. It varies widely what people believe to be a normal or good nap, so its important to know what the average nap looks like. Some people think babies should sleep 3 hours each time and others seem to think 30 minutes is enough. I remember one parent who would keep her twins in their cribs for almost a whole afternoon (3-4 hours) because thats how long she thought they should sleep. Wrong! After 5-6 months of age, I recommend a nap hour for the first 2 naps of the day in which your baby is in his/her crib for one hour, sleeping or not. This encourages her to go back to sleep after a short nap. This also gives you a break to take a shower or eat or just relax. Your frame of mind is also very important in being an effective parent day in and day out. Your baby will get used to having a set nap hour and will come to expect it. At first my son would wake up and fuss/cry for 15 minutes (he was a 45 minute napper), then he started waking up and playing and then he woke up, played and then went back to sleep and then finally kept sleeping through that 45 minute mark most of the time. I have recommended this to many parents and it really works!

Many babies have a hard time withstanding too much overtiredness before they get irritable and cranky to be able to be on a schedule much before 6 months. Prior to 6 months, the key to better sleep for your child is to avoid letting him get overtired. Overtired babies have more trouble falling asleep and staying asleep. Prior to 6 months, make sure wake time is a short 1-2 hours TOPS. As soon as you see sleepy cues, start soothing him for sleep. After about 6 months, you want to start to nap your baby by the clock (BTC) where her schedule will be roughly the same every day regardless of how long she slept the night before, when she woke up or how long her nap was. A typical schedule might be 7(wake)9(nap)-1(nap)-(4)(nap)-7(bed) (this needs to be customized to your baby who may or may not sleep 12 hours a night and perhaps needs shorter wake time in the morning but longer in the afternoon). The third nap is optional and usually a short 30-45 minute catnap that most babies lose by 9 months old (if they had it at all). Because its optional, typically we dont worry about the 3rd nap being in the crib, but can be in the stroller or on the go, if baby allows it (mine didnt!). All other naps ideally should be in the crib since moving sleep is not as restorative. My first son didnt get good at a schedule until 7 months when he could be up longer (he was VERY cranky if you tried to keep him up too long and then would take short naps), so all babies are different as to when a schedule may work. Babies transition to just one nap between 10 and 18 months, with the average being 15-18 months old. I usually recommend keeping 2 naps as long as possible because transitioning to one nap can take months and its often a bear as your child gets severely overtired. Before transitioning to one nap, you might notice your child starting to skip his afternoon nap. Your first step will be to limit the first nap to only 1 hour (if its longer than that) to encourage that second nap.

Some days your baby may take one nap and other days take two. Allow this flexibility (if you can) so he doesnt get too overtired. During this transition, make sure bedtime is sufficiently early. I made a mistake (before I knew better) with my own son and he transitioned easily but a month later it really caught up with him and it waslets just saymessy. I have had other parents Ive given this same advice to go through a similar problem. If you think the bedtime youve set is too early, its probably perfect. Once they truly are only taking one nap, try to move it to 11-12pm by 15 minutes per day. A typical schedule might be 6(wake)-11(nap)-6(bed) or 7-12-7. Most babies lose their last nap between 3 and 4 years old, though some will lose it earlier around 2 years old and others may still nap going to kindergarten at 5. The timing of the loss of the last nap varies widely. With any nap transitions, make sure bedtime is sufficiently early because babies tend to get very overtired when losing any of their naps. Some are more sensitive than others.

HYPERLINK "http://members.picknicksbrain.com/ help-your-child-sleep/shiftingschedules/"Shifting Schedules

Now that I have preached up and down about not letting your baby get overtired, there is one time you may want to allow it. If your baby is sleeping well and getting adequate rest, but waking up too early or going to bed too late, you can attempt to shift his

schedule. Keep in mind that newborns often have late bedtimes until 7 or 8 weeks old, so this is not applicable for newborns. Also keep in mind that shifting schedules is extremely difficult for babies younger than about 7-8 months old. They really need their early bedtime to get optimum sleep. But, older than 8 months, I usually start to recommend attempting a schedule shift. Our internal clocks drive when we get sleepy and when we are awake (along with hunger and other bodily systems). The idea is to shift this internal clock forward (or back), in small increments. However, there is some trickiness to it and most people make the mistake of only moving bedtime. To shift your babys schedule forward Start with a time of day he can most withstand some overtiredness. For most babies, that will be the last nap of the day or bedtime. Put him down for bed 15 minutes later than normal and shift all subsequent sleep periods by 15 minutes, too (including meals, if necessary). Heres the tricky part. He may not sleep later than normal! Our internal clocks are strong (some more than others), so he may wake at the normal time but now 15 minutes lacking in sleep. DONT LET HIM MAKE UP THIS SLEEP in his other sleep periods. It is important that you have already logged his sleep to know whether you need to wake him from naps. Unfortunately, they do get overtired during this process and it can take 1-2 weeks, depending on how much you are attempting to shift. Each day you shift by 15 more minutes until you are at the time you desire. Example Schedule Shift Forward: Goal: Wake at 6:30 Current schedule: 5:00(wake)-7(nap)-11(nap)-2(nap)-5:30(bed)

Naps are 1 hour each Day 1: 5(wake)-7:00(nap)-11(nap)-2:15(nap)-5:45(bed) Day 2: 5(wake)-7:15(nap)-11:15(nap)-2:30(nap)-6:00(bed) only allowing 1 hr naps Day 3: 5:15-7:30-11:30-2:45-6:30 only allowing 1 hr naps Day 4: 5:30-7:45-11:45-3:00-6:45 only allowing 1 hr naps Day 5: 5:30-7:45-11:45-3:00-6:45 only allowing 1 hr naps Stand pat for a day Day 6: 5:45-8:00-12:00-3:15-7:00 only allowing 1 hr naps Day 6: 6:00-8:15-12:15-3:30-7:15 only allowing 1 hr naps And so onI cant tell you how it will EXACTLY go, but you get the idea. To shift your babys schedule back You cant control when a baby falls asleep, but you can control when you wake him up. So, the way you shift a schedule backwards (i.e. if baby is going to bed at 10pm and waking at 9am) is to control the wake-up time. If you fight your child to go to bed every night from 8pm until 10 pm, for example, and then allow him to sleep in until 9am, he will continue to have that schedule. I know you want him to get sleep, but if youd rather he go to bed earlier, heres what you do. Make bedtime the time he normally goes to sleep. Yes, I know that sounds crazy, but hear me out. Wake him up in the morning 15-30 minutes earlier than normal (and put him down for a nap the same amount of time earlier) and keep bedtime the same time. And, then shift wake (and nap) time by 15-30 minutes earlier the next morning, too. One of your goals here is to have him start going to bed easier and to sleep faster, so hes now associating bedtime a certain way. Keep waking him earlier and earlier until you are at the time you

desire him to get up. Also, dont let him catch up on any sleep during any naps!! Once he is going to sleep quickly and by now he is probably getting overly tired, start moving bedtime back by 15 minutes each day until he no longer is falling asleep as quickly. Once you get to the point he takes 10-15 minutes to fall asleep, you are probably at the right bedtime. Example Schedule Shift Back: Goal: Bedtime at 8 p.m., Wake at 7 a.m. Current schedule: 9(wake)-3(nap)-8:30(bed; sleep at 10) Nap is 1 1/2 hours Day 1: 9(wake)-3(nap)-10(bed) Day 2: 8:30(wake)-2:30(nap)-10(bed) dont allow nap to go longer than normal Day 3: 8:00-2:00-9:30 dont allow nap to go longer than normal Day 4: 7:45-1:45-9:15 Day 5: 7:30-1:30-9:00 Day 6: 7:15-1:15-8:45 Day 6: 7:00-1:00-8:30 Day 7: 7:00-1:00-8:30 Continue with the schedule until he is obviously tired by 8 p.m. or you are at a schedule you like or can live with. I cant tell you how it will EXACTLY go, but you get the idea.

HYPERLINK "http://members.picknicksbrain.com/ help-your-child-sleep/sleep-

routines/"Sleep Routines
A bedtime routine is important to cue your child that sleep is on the horizon and sets her expectations. They are also very useful when you are away from home and want to cue her to sleep elsewhere. A predictable sequence of events helps her feel comfortable and secure in whats going to happen each night. Children thrive on routine. Routines are generally shorter (10-15 minutes) when shes a baby and become longer (15-30 minutes or as much as 1 hour for spirited children who need more wind-down time) as she grows into a toddler. A typical bedtime routine might include diaper and pajamas, a quiet game, nursing/bottle/sippie (for babies younger than 1 or 2), teeth brushing, potty (if applicable), book (or 2), singing and cuddling, and then lights out. I purposely did not include a bath in my sample routine above for a few reasons: Some parents simply dont have the time or desire to give a bath every single night. You might work full time and not get home until pretty close to bedtime. Your child may have dry skin and even plain water can dry out his skin more. If your child is spirited, a bath can actually have the opposite effect from relaxing your child and instead, give him a boost of energy. Whatever your specific routine is, the individual steps are unimportant. It is only your consistency that makes your routines successful or not. Sometimes all thats standing in the way of a child sleeping well is a good, consistent routine.

A nap routine is usually very similar to the bedtime routine, but usually shorter (about 10 minutes). Again, the key is the consistency, not the specific steps.

HYPERLINK "http://members.picknicksbrain.com/ help-your-child-sleep/sleepassociations/"Sleep Associations Is it harmful to rock

your baby? Is it a bad idea to rock your baby? Can it be harmful to your baby? It depends. It is never a bad idea to cuddle your baby and give her lots of love and affection! Its only when rocking your baby becomes a task difficult to sustain is it a problem. It becomes harmful to the baby if you need to continually rock your baby all night long, robbing her of adequate sleep. How do you fall asleep? What kind of routine do you do before you go to sleep each night? Do you watch TV? Talk to your partner? Do you read a book? Do you sleep on a pillow? These are the types of things you associate with going to sleep each night. What would happen if your power was out and you couldnt watch the news or read your book? Would you have trouble falling asleep? Maybe. Maybe not. Would you have trouble going to sleep without your pillow? That might be more likely to give you trouble. Some sleep associations are stronger than others. What if you went to sleep with your pillow and covers and 2 hours later woke up and they were gone? Would you be able to go back to sleep without looking for the pillow? Now lets look at how this concept might affect your baby.

How does your child fall asleep? Lets look at how many babies fall asleep. They might fall asleep while their mother or father is rocking them in a rocking chair, bundled up and very cozy in their parents arms. Or, they may fall asleep nursing or sucking on a bottle of breast milk or formula. Or, maybe they doze off with the simple use of a pacifier. Minus the teeth issue with breast milk / formula later on, there isnt a problem with any of these methods of falling asleep until it is a problem. From the time my son was an itty bitty baby, he loved to be walked, rocked and nursed to sleep. He also loved napping in the moving swing. At first this was not a problem. He would fall asleep quickly and wed put him down. But, several weeks later, I found myself rocking him for 2-3 hours each night to put him to bed. Hed fall asleep easily, but then when I put him down hed wake up! Ah! And, then Id need to repeat it every 1-2 hours when he woke up. It was exhausting! And, I didnt understand why until later on when I learned about sleep associations. The problem with sleep associations lies in the fact that your baby needs YOU to recreate the environment in which they fell asleep. YOU become their pillow and when they wake up through sleep transitions (that we ALL have!) and their pillow is gone, they dont know how to go back to sleep. So, the key is to allow them to go to sleep the same way they will wake up periodically throughout the night. If they wake up briefly and find you gone or the movement has stopped (as with my son) or their pacifier is gone orthey will wake up more and have to call out to you so you can help them once again. Find my pillow, mommy and daddy!!

I want to reiterate that rocking your baby, using a pacifier, nursing or drinking a bottle before bed, etc. are not bad things to do. If you dont mind rocking your baby for 10 minutes and he falls asleep, you transfer him to his bed (or take him to bed with you) and he sleeps all night, then there is no problem. Its only when you cant keep up with the that it becomes a problem. Keep in mind that your sleep fragmentation that makes you exhausted is no better for your baby than it is for you. If you are cranky, dont you think she will be too over time? I would have LOVED to rock my son to sleep every night and boy did I try over and over (unintentionally just in my nature). We slipped back into bad habits more times than I want to count, but it just became a hitch for him EVERY time. In the end, I was able to continue to nurse him to sleep once he learned the necessary skills to go BACK to sleep throughout the rest of the night, but he did have to learn those first. With opportunity and practice we can all learn a new way to sleep, even without a pillow! Some nursing mothers start to believe they should wean because the baby is becoming dependent on nursing to go to sleep. Please do not wean for this reason alone. Babies can form a sleep association with nursing, but just as easily form one with a bottle, too. Either way, the key here is that baby learns to fall asleep on his own regardless of food source. I successfully nursed my eldest son for 13 months and also helped him learn how to fall asleep without it.

HYPERLINK "http://members.picknicksbrain.com/ help-your-child-sleep/when-to-sleeptrain/"When to Sleep Train

Typically, it is not recommended to start formal sleep training until at least 4 months old. However, every parent must decide for herself when the best time to start for your baby. You know your baby best! For younger babies, there is an alternative method described below. However, under 2 months of age it is highly recommended to do whatever you can to help your baby sleep and do not even employ the sleep training variation. Some parents (particularly if they have a very challenging sleeper but have other kids to tend to), decide to start at 10 weeks old only to find it doesnt work and try again at 12 weeks with great success. So, if you do start early, you may need to monitor closer and reassess sooner than recommended below. I based when to start sleep training my sons on the time it seemed the way they were falling asleep became a preference, rather than a necessity. In other words, when they were 6 weeks old, I could tell they needed my help to fall asleep. Later on, I recognized when they wanted it, but my help was only getting in the way of better sleep. It is never too early to start routines and set the stage for healthy sleep habits, though. It does not hurt to try to put your baby down drowsy, but awake from birth, but of course many babies may not actually fall asleep on their own. Also, I highly recommend not running to baby at the slightest whimper. It is common for babies to re-settle themselves and when you get to them too quickly you might actually wake them up or at the very least, inhibit their ability to learn how to self-soothe back to sleep when its possible they may have re-settled on their very own. I know at 2am, 1 minute feels like 20, so watch the clock. Ideally, it is best to sleep train by 7 months or so because as babies get older, habits will die harder. I have seen parents feel they started too late by just having waited until 8 months. But, every parent must feel comfortable in their decision, too. I do believe parents struggle more once baby can pull up and stand in her crib, though. Of course,

if you are reading this and your baby is already older, dont fret! You, too, can make changes!

HYPERLINK "http://members.picknicksbrain.com/ help-your-child-sleep/how-to-sleeptrain/"How to Sleep Train

It is unlikely that breaking sleep associations and changing rules on how a baby goes to sleep will be met without at least some protest. You are changing all they have known for however long youve been putting them to sleep the way you have been. They may not like it, at first, just like you may not like to learn how to stop sleeping with a pillow. But, with time and consistency, we all can learn a new way to sleep. We can all learn a new skill (way to sleep) with time, patience, commitment and PRACTICE! You cannot expect to make changes without allowing them to practice the new skill, just like riding a bike. If you always hold on, they will never learn to balance themselves. All of the below methods I describe will indicate that you do your babys bedtime routine and then put him down DROWSY, BUT AWAKE. Ideally, drowsy is when baby is just about asleep, eyes closed and when you put him down he re-settles himself and goes to sleep. We are not always successful at achieving the perfect drowsiness level, but you want your baby as relaxed as possible before you put him down. However, you do not want to take an hour to do this, either. Most nap routines are about 10 minutes and bedtime routines about 20-30 minutes (longer for colicky or spirited children who need more soothing). Do not make routines so long that you are putting baby down too late just to get the perfect

drowsiness because then he will become overtired making it harder to fall asleep and probably lead to more crying. During initial training you should opt for an earlier bedtime, not a later one. Many people figure they will keep baby up longer in hopes of tiring them out only this backfires because baby will be overtired and overtired children have more trouble falling asleep and staying asleep (have I said that enough times yet?). They also cry longer and harder. This is even true after you train. Depending on how sensitive your baby is to overtiredness, he may be going to sleep just fine for 2 weeks and then cry hard one night and youll wonder whats wrong. This could mean bedtime was too late and he was overtired. If baby falls asleep during the routine, some people feel they need to jostle the baby awake in order to make sure they are semi-awake when they go into the crib. I disagree. This is unnecessary. Just try to put him down sooner in the process next time. However, if your problem is night-wakings and not bedtime, I do encourage parents to start the night how they expect the rest will go. If you put baby all the way to sleep at bedtime and then when he wakes up during a sleep cycle and you let him cry, for example, this is confusing to baby and, in my opinion, unfair. He should fall asleep initially at bedtime the same way he is to go BACK to sleep the rest of the night. In fact, learning how to fall asleep at bedtime can and will pave the way for him to know how to go BACK to sleep at night. Note: Some babies master going TO sleep much sooner than going BACK to sleep, though. Similarly, with any of the below methods, you should handle bedtime and night-wakings using the same method. I usually recommend starting sleep training with nights and then work on days. Some people like to do both at the same time to be

consistent, however different parts of the brain handle each day and night sleep. So, actually, you can continue to rock/nurse/etc. to sleep for naps and not at bedtime and nights, but it is up to you who knows your baby best to know what will have the most potential for success. I recommend starting with nights because parents usually see results much faster at night, compared to days, giving you confidence to stick with it. Naps can take up to 2 weeks or longer while some of the methods above can take only 3-4 nights. Once you start to see progress, you will have more wherewithal to continue with the training. Also, at night you have very little doubt your baby is tired, so that will help you stick to it and not second guess yourself.

HYPERLINK "http://members.picknicksbrain.com/ help-your-child-sleep/sleep-trainingmethods/"Sleep Training Methods

No/Limited Crying Techniques Fading Technique The fading technique is when you do help him/her to sleep, but you have guidelines/rules and you are slowly allowing him/her to learn how to fall asleep on his/her own. He may cry, but its with you there and you do what you can to limit any crying. So, for example, the first night you might do your routine and put him down in his crib (or in bed with you as I did) DROWSY, BUT AWAKE pat his/her back, sing to him, ssshhhyou might even pick him/her

up if he is getting too upset, but the main rule is he falls asleep in the crib (or next to you), not on you, not rocking, not nursing, not doing the primary sleep association you are trying to break. The next night (or 2nd or whenever you are comfortable), you might graduate to doing less patting, singing, etc. or you might not pick up at all. The next night you might verbally soothe, but no touching (or vice versa). The next night maybe you are just sitting there, etc. This method takes more time, patience and consistency than other methods, but it can work with your commitment. Some babies do just get more frustrated with you there, but the main key is he starts to learn how to fall asleep without your help. When I did this with my eldest son, I nursed him in our glider and then I took him to bed with me (we had been co-sleeping). I laid him next to me to fall asleep. Anytime hed cry, Id pat him a little (not too much because we were trying to break the movement and nursing-to-sleep habit), sing and ssshhhh him. It took us TWO LONG HOURS for TWO NIGHTS but by night 3 he did it in just 20 minutes and on the 4th night in his crib with NO CRYING! We later had setbacks (and more setbacks and we ultimately did end up using a crying method, but with son #2, we never had to and used this same method), but that was our first step in achieving 10x better sleep for all of us. I tell you this to show you that its not for the faint of heart. Those 2 hours were very frustrating for both of us when I knew hed be asleep in 2 minutes if I just nursed him. He took to sucking on my sheet (and later a light receiving blanket I slept on that became his lovey for 2-3 months. He never took a pacifier nor sucked his thumb. I got lucky!). I have recommended this method to many parents who do not wish to let their child cry. It works for some and not others. Your commitment and ability to stick with it is the primary driving force in the success behind it along with your babys temperament. I recommend writing your plan down ahead of time, so you will stick with it. You can always tweak it, but thinking

it through helps to commit to it. Pros: Very limited crying Parent doesnt feel like she is abandoning her baby Cons: Most likely will take a lot longer than other methods from a couple weeks to several months making it hard for the parent to stick to 100%. Might be easier to slip back to old habits after illnesses, traveling, etc. Crying techniques Chair Method This is a variation of the fading method above, but usually you allow more crying, but with you right there. Typically, you do not interact much with your child with this method, but are only there to reinforce that you have not left him/her alone. The first night you will place a chair as close to the crib/bed as possible, sit on it and soothe with your voice when (s)he is crying. After a night or two, you move the chair a bit further. Another couple of nights later, you move the chair even further, etc. until the chair is out of the room and you are leaving her alone to fall asleep on his/her own. You will want to reiterate the same words over and over, so your baby learns that the words mean go to sleep. You might say things like Its okay. Im right here, but its time for you to go night night. I love you. This is a good method to choose especially if you have an aversion to allowing a baby to cry alone in his/her room. If progress is too slow, you may want to limit much talking whatsoever with your baby as any positive or negative attention typically encourages the crying to continue. Pros: Parent doesnt feel like (s)he is abandoning his/her baby

Cons: Most likely will take somewhat longer than other methods. May be more difficult for the parent to stick to watching their baby cry. Check-and-console Some know this as The Ferber Method or Ferberizing. This method is a crying method, but you go in and check on baby at intervals until she falls asleep (for naps limit crying to 1 hour). The first night you go in after 5 minutes (or 3 if you are more comfortable), then 10 (or 5), then every 15 (or 10) minutes. Every night you increase each interval by 5 minutes and you treat all nightwakings the same (after any feedings, if applicable). When you go in to check and console you are to reassure her, but not pick her up and certainly not help her to sleep because this is what she is learning to do on her own! This is an important note because many times the parent thinks they are supposed to soothe the baby to sleep, but the idea is only to check on her for your peace of mind and to reassure her that you have not vanished. Pros: Usually only takes 3-4 nights for nighttime training. Reassuring when you go check on the baby and see she is okay. Cons: Can be difficult to go in and see your baby crying and stick to it, especially if baby cries for a longer period of time. Example Check-and-Console Session Night 1: Put baby down DROWSY, BUT AWAKE and she cries immediately. Go in after 5 minutes, then 10, then every 15 until she falls asleep. Treat all night-wakings the same way (after any applicable feedings, if necessary). Night 2: Put baby down and she plays for 10 minutes and then begins to cry. Start the timer after she starts to cry. Go in after 10

minutes of crying, then 15, then every 20 until she is asleep. Treat all night-wakings using the same intervals. Night 3: Put down and she plays for 10 minutes, wimpers for 5 minutes and falls asleep. No need to go in! But, she wakes at 2am, nurses, but doesnt go right back to sleep. You put her down after nursing and she cries for 10 minutes and falls asleep. No need to go in because your new intervals were 15 minutes, then 20, then every 25. Cry-It-Out This method is where you dont go in at all. After his routine, you put him down DROWSY, BUT AWAKE and leave him to fall asleep on his own. For nighttime training, you do not limit the crying because you dont want to teach baby to cry for a predetermined amount of time. For naps, you limit to 1 hour. Pros: Usually only takes 3-4 nights for nighttime training. Many people feel that check-and-console just riles up baby more during the visits and therefore, feel this method leads to less crying overall. Cons: Very difficult to not go in if baby is crying for a lengthy amount of time. Difficult not to see they are okay, unless you have a video monitor. Alternative Cry-It-Out This method is typically for younger babies (6 months and younger) and it takes a lot of time, patience and consistency, but can work and would be well worth it in the end. You do a routine described above and put baby down DROWSY, BUT AWAKE and leave him be for 20 minutes (crying or not). If he does not sleep, get him up and try

again 30 minutes later. Repeat until they get the hang of falling asleep on their own. It is a learning process.

HYPERLINK "http://members.picknicksbrain.com/ help-your-child-sleep/why-sleeptraining-is-not-cry-it-out/"What is Cry-It-Out

and Why Sleep Training is NOT Cry-It-Out Over time, it seems the term sleep training has become synonymous with the term cry-it-out, with good reason with some of the websites out there. Cry-it-out means something different to everyone. I know those against it seem to equate it to throwing your baby in a room to cry for hours on-end simply because you dont want to tend to the baby. I wholeheartedly disagree with this definition. Cry-It-Out should never replace parenting we all must do such as feedings, diaper-changes, etc. Allowing your baby to cry because you do not wish to replace a pacifier 10 times per night or nurse all night or feed a bottle every hour when baby does not need it, is a whole other matter (see Crying During Sleep Training for more information). Sleep training starts with respecting your childs need for sleep and doing your part to ensure he gets the sleep he needs. This does not mean throwing up your hands if they wont nap and saying to yourself I guess if she wont sleep, she doesnt need it. Babies, toddlers, and young children need a LOT of sleep. The #1 important aspect of how you help them get the sleep they need, is that you are consistent. To nap with them only on Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays, for example, will only confuse them and set unrealistic expectations. This is unfair to them. So, whatever you do to get your

child to sleep, do it the same way each time as much as possible. This is not to say that some days wont need to be more flexible or that rules wont be broken, I am only talking on the whole.

HYPERLINK "http://members.picknicksbrain.com/ help-your-child-sleep/crying-duringsleep-training/"Crying During Sleep Training

Please keep in mind that the crying during sleep training is protesting the change in how they are falling asleep (I dont want to sleep without a pillow! Why are you making me?! (See Sleep Associations)). You are not abandoning him. And, you are not MAKING your baby cry; you are LETTING him cry. Big difference! You are allowing him to learn how to fall asleep; something we all must learn. And, it is perfectly fine if you dont want to allow your baby to cry. Just use another method. Its only important that you promote healthy sleep habits for the both of you. There have been no studies (zero!) that have shown crying damages a child neither physically or emotionally. Our relationships with our children are very complex and no one thing you do (or dont do) is going to affect trust or security or anything else in your relationship with your child. It is the combination of all we do that builds the trust, security and confidence in our children. Some people want you to believe that letting your baby cry is cruel and will cause damage. But, lets face it, not all babies are easy sleepers. Some babies are more strong-willed than others and some need to blow off some steam before bed. It is unhealthy for babies to have fragmented sleep, just as it is unhealthy for you. It is up to each parent to decide whether it is better for her to lose hours of sleep just

to avoid some tears or not. But, in reality, the crying is usually much harder on the parents than the baby. It is all worth it when baby wakes happily from a good nights rest. For years to come your baby will protest rules that you make such as no candy before dinner, No forks in an outlet, Must sit in carseat while driving and this is similar to that. You are making rules for your baby and babies thrive on routine and limits. She will slowly start to understand, over time, that you are doing whats best for her by allowing her to get the sleep she needs. I, personally, ended up using a crying method for my eldest son and never once regretted it. I honestly know there was no alternative. Years later, he is a great sleeper, but still afraid that going to bed means he will miss something very exciting and still doesnt want to go to bed! I remind myself one day I will have to drag him out of bed when he is a teenager. As many other things, the amount of crying varies by baby. Some cry 5-10 minutes and sleep the rest of the night while others can cry for 1-2 hours or more and continue to wake up a few times in the night. It is important to be 100% committed and stick to it for one solid week before deciding it is not working. While your baby is crying, it sometimes helps to occupy yourself with something else like a shower, laundry, etc. If it will help, make yourself a mantra to get through it. An example might be Should I go in there? No. Because he would have cried all that time for nothing and thats not fair. My waffling is not fair. What is the alternative? Only what has not worked so far. He needs to learn to sleep. Once you start a crying method, be careful about giving in. It is really difficult to know whether you are 100% committed until you are going through it, but when we allow them to cry for an amount

of time and then rescue him, we basically guarantee that much crying, or more, next time. Believe me, I know how hard it is! This is only a warning to try to 100% commit to any method for a week before you decide it isnt working. If you have a particularly difficult case, however, dont hesitate to take a break if you both need one. It may or may not make it a little harder down the road, but sometimes you really do just need a break from it all. Many people are convinced their baby will be one who cries all night and then are pleasantly surprised when she cries 15 minutes. No, Im not going to promise you YOURS will only cry 15 minutes. The longest crying session I know about is my own. My first sons longest crying session was 2 hours. That was the worst night, but everything was 10 times better after we got through those first few days. No doubt my waffling leading up to that point actually promoted more crying due to my prior failed attempts. I did not understand the importance of 100% commitment that Im trying to share with you today. No parent plans ahead of time they are going to let their baby cry to help them learn to sleep, but in reality, sometimes thats just where you end up and it doesnt make you a bad parent that you did! Whether your baby is having trouble functioning or you are, sleep deprivation takes its toll on many families. From post-partum depression to running stop signs while driving (one parent came to me when she did) to risking your job that feeds your family, sleep deprivation is hard on parents, too. I also believe that when we are sleep-deprived, we are not as effective parents. You might sit on the couch more rather than take your baby outside or engage them in a book. You might be less patient with them. And, if they are cranky, they wont be learning as much or have as much fun learning to crawl or watch as you read a book. So, dont let a few tears be the only thing to stand in your way of healthy sleep habits for you and

your family.

HYPERLINK "http://members.picknicksbrain.com/ help-your-child-sleep/nap-training/"Nap

Training To nap train, do a short 10 minute routine (book, light music, rocking) and put baby in his crib DROWSY, BUT AWAKE. Then, implement the nap hour as explained in the HYPERLINK "http://members.picknicksbrain.com/uncategorized/naps-andschedules/" \n _selfNaps and Schedules section of this book, detailed further here. Your baby should have a designated nap time in his crib for one hour for his first 2 naps of each day. Require him to stay in his crib for one hour, sleeping or not. This will encourage him to go BACK to sleep should he wake too early and help lengthen his naps. Once a baby has slept at least one hour, though, it is highly unlikely he will go back to sleep, even if hes still tired, so just get him up at that point. Nap training is very similar in that you use the same techniques mentioned above for nights, but if you are using a crying method, you limit crying to 1 hour. If you are not using a crying method, youd do your method of choice for one hour. If she does not sleep in that one hour, get her up and try again one hour later. Do not wait until the next scheduled nap time as that is too long and she will be overtired. This is temporary because as you continue to nap train, she will stop crying through the full hour and you will be able to get back to a schedule (if shes old enough see HYPERLINK "http://members.picknicksbrain.com/uncategorized/naps-andschedules/" \n _selfNaps and Schedules section).

Note: For particularly strong-willed babies or babies that are sleeping 45 minutes, for example, but need more than 15 minutes to fall back to sleep, you may want to give him 1 hour 15 or 30 minutes to give him enough time to sleep. This is a judgment call. When I was doing this, if at the 1 hour mark, he sounded pretty close to going back to sleep, I gave my son 10-15 more minutes. If he was crying, I got him up, since he had already fulfilled his one hour requirement. At first he did wake up and fuss/cry for 15 minutes, then he started waking and playing, then hed wake, play and go back to sleep and finally, he started just sleeping straight through most of the time (we all have bad days, though, so dont expect every nap or every day to be perfect). If your baby does not sleep for an entire hour, get him up and try again an hour later. If he sleeps at all, however brief, give him another nap either on schedule (if hes old enough) or once you start to see sleepy signs if you are still napping based on cues. For the final nap of the day, do not implement a nap hour, but only give him half an hour. This nap is usually a short catnap 30-45 minutes, but is also considered optional and thus, its the hardest nap to get from your baby. This is the only nap that is OK to give in a stroller, car, etc. if baby will fall asleep. My first son did not, so I always napped him in the crib. At the very least, if he does not sleep, this is down-time once he learns not to cry during this time. They learn to play and chill out because now this is routine and theyve come to expect they have designated times in the crib, no matter what. It is important that you try to put your baby down before she is overtired when doing nap training (please see Naps and Schedules for ideal wake-times and schedules to try). Once she is overtired, she is more likely to cry through the whole hour. This is true even weeks

down the road after she may be sleeping wonderfully for days onend. During initial training, always err on the side of earlier rather than later. And, I always suggest having baby in bed 10 minutes before you want her to be asleep. This gives her unwind time and time to fall asleep before she gets overtired and possibly a second wind from the hormone rush fighting fatigue. That means you are starting your nap routine 20 minutes prior to fall asleep time and putting her down 10 minutes later. Although it is ideal baby is drowsy when she goes into the crib, this is simply not always possible. It is better to put her down on time than to achieve perfect drowsiness level. A variation on nap training is to first focus on falling TO sleep at nap time. You would use the nap hour as a way to help her learn to fall asleep at nap time, but not worry about the length of the naps just yet. As long as she fell asleep, however brief, once she woke up you would get her up right away. Once she is falling TO sleep on her own within 10 minutes or so, you can then start to encourage her to lengthen the naps as discussed above. The idea here is that if you are using a crying method, it is sometimes brutal to allow them to cry for 20 minutes, she sleeps 30 and you allow her to cry another 10. If you simply cant do that or dont want to, this variation is a good choice. You want to choose a method that you are most likely to 100% commit to with success.

HYPERLINK "http://members.picknicksbrain.com/ help-your-child-sleep/nightweaning/"Night Weaning

The answer to the question of when a child can go all night without

eating varies widely among the experts and pediatricians alike. Some will say once they double their birth weight while others will say 1-2 feedings up until 9 months is normal. Some say they need to eat on demand every 3 to 6 hours until they are on 3 square solid meals per day. Many will say by 6 months they can go all night without eating and others say by 3 or 4 months. I personally believe that babies vary and so will the answer to this question and thus it is up to you, who know your baby best, (and your pediatrician) to determine whether she needs to eat at night. It is important to note that it is not normal for a baby to need to eat every hour or two once they are at least 3 months old (or sooner). If this is happening, it is likely your baby has a sleep association with a bottle or nursing (see above). Studies have shown that it has nothing to do with nutrition or solids, but a developmental milestone, so please dont start solids only to lengthen sleep. I typically err on the side of caution that a baby needs to eat at night 1-2 times up through 9 months or even a year. I, personally, nightweaned my eldest son when he stopped going right back to sleep at 4 a.m. and decided it was disrupting his sleep too much. However, even after night-weaning, he continued to wake in the 5 oclock hour up through a year old 3-4 times per week. I tried to fully night-wean him, but in the end decided it was best for both of us to feed him and then put him back down for another 1-2 hours. He was finally able to go all night on his own around his first birthday. My philosophy is to sleep train to fix problems, but not make a child go hungry if they cant comfortably go all night without nutrition. There are several methods to night-wean your baby. Some people employ a cold-turkey approach where they just decide to stop feeding at night. They may not go in at all or they may do checks, but not feed. Many babies usually stop eating in just a couple nights

(if they are ready). An alternative and my recommended method would be to nightwean slower because even if your baby doesnt need to eat at night doesnt mean she isnt used to eating at night and legitimately hungry. The idea is to slowly make your baby go longer between feedings and at the same time, eat less. So, every night you increase the time between feedings by 30 minutes while also decreasing how much she eats by 1 ounce (if bottle-fed) or 1 minute (if nursing). If you are unsure how long she is nursing, just make a rough guess about 8-10 minutes or start where you are comfortable. It is up to you whether you include time to let-down (if nursing). Whatever you choose, be consistent and the details are unimportant. It is important to note that healthy babies WILL adjust and eat more during the day. Up until now, its a chicken and egg problem because she wont eat more during the day while getting some calories at night and wont stop eating at night if she doesnt eat more during the day. Thats why a slower transition helps even it out with the least amount of tears. If your pediatrician has given you the go-ahead to stop feeding at night, this is a good method to do so. The theory behind this method is that you train your body to get hungry at roughly the same time every day, similar to how you might get hungry for lunch at the same time every day and you slowly want to adjust to a later or earlier time. Example Night-weaning (Complete night-weaning) Current schedule: 2 feedings at roughly 1 a.m. and 4 a.m. 4 oz bottles each (or 2 8-minute nursings) Night 1: Do not feed until 1:30 a.m. and 5 a.m. (you are increasing time between feedings, too) and decrease bottle to 3 oz (or reduce nursing time to 7 minutes).

Night 2: Do not feed until 2 a.m. and 5:30 a.m. and decrease bottle to 2 oz (or nurse 6 minutes). Night 3: Do not feed until 2:30 a.m. and 6 a.m. and decrease bottle to 1 oz each (or nurse 5 minutes). Night 4: Do not feed Example Night-weaning (Reduce to just 1 night-feeding) Current schedule: 2 feedings at roughly 1 a.m. and 4 a.m. 4 oz bottles each (or 2 8-minute nursings) Night 1: Do not feed until 1:30 a.m. (full feeding) and 5 a.m. (you are increasing time between feedings, too) and decrease only the 2nd bottle to 3 oz (or nurse 7 minutes). Night 2: Do not feed until 2 a.m. (full feeding) and 5:30 a.m. and decrease 2nd bottle to 2 oz (or nurse 6 minutes). Night 3: Do not feed until 2:30 a.m. (full feeding) and 6 a.m. and decrease bottle to 1 oz each (or nurse 5 minutes). Night 4: Do not feed until 3:00 a.m. (full feeding) and do not feed a 2nd time until time to get up. Make it a goal to get the one and only feeding to 3 or 4 a.m.

HYPERLINK "http://members.picknicksbrain.com/ help-your-child-sleep/transitioningfrom-co-sleeping-to-crib/"Transitioning From

Co-Sleeping to Crib

When transitioning from co-sleeping to a crib, first, make sure to spend some non-sleep time in your babys room and crib. Play with him, read books, etc. This will help him feel comfortable in his room. Second, sleep on a light receiving blanket for a night or two so it smells like you and this will give him comfort while he sleeps alone (Note: You must do what you are comfortable with. Due to the SIDS risk, I only did this after 4 months old. Please review with your pediatrician if you have doubts about when to do this). Finally, use one of the methods above to help him learn how to fall asleep on his own. I typically recommend a slower (and non-crying) approach the longer youve been co-sleeping as its a big change for your baby. It will take longer, but you will be better able to stick to it and be consistent and your baby may have an easier time coping with the big change.

HYPERLINK "http://members.picknicksbrain.com/ help-your-child-sleep/transitioningfrom-crib-to-toddler-bed/"Transitioning From

Crib to Toddler/Twin Bed HYPERLINK "http://members.picknicksbrain.com/help-your-childsleep-step-by-step"Help Your Child Sleep Table of Contents On average, most people transition their toddlers to big beds around 2-3 years old. The main challenge with a big bed is the imaginary boundaries. For some younger toddlers, they simply are not ready, developmentally, and some dont feel as secure without the comfort of the enclosure. For a smoother transition, involve your toddler in purchasing the bed

(and furniture, if applicable) such that she is a part of this big transition. It will get her excited about it, too. It is important to take into consideration your childs personality when transitioning. My son, for example, was very adverse to change. Transitions are hard for him, even today. So, we transitioned over a period of a month. We had a baby on the way and started decorating his new room with a Cars theme. We involved him and took our time getting it ready. It built up the event. We spent time in his new room during nonsleep times, too. When we felt he was ready (because he was finally asking to sleep in there), we moved his crib into his new room, too, and gave him the option of either the bed or the crib. Toddlers love choices! He chose the bed, but I felt good knowing wed have the crib, just in case he woke up in a panic. He never did and never did sleep in his crib again. Perhaps we were lucky. I do believe that bedtime routines are very important. He was already comfortable in his routines and so the only change was the room & bed he was sleeping in. If your child is not adverse to change or transition, some pull off the band-aid fast by just switching to a bed one day. They may count down with a calendar and celebrate with a small party in the room, complete with balloons. Or, they surprise their child with a new room when she didnt know it was even going to happen. Either way, make it a big deal in a positive way to get your child excited about it. Some children feel a bit uneasy, at first. My son did too. Its normal. Some will say not to stay with your child until he falls asleep, so you do not set that expectation every night. I think that is good advice, however, I do think we, as parents, need to also give them security. I do think it is possible to stay with her until she is asleep for a few days to a week and then work your way up to leaving sooner and

sooner in the process (similar to Fading, above). If she is feeling uneasy, let her know you will be back in 5 minutes to check on her if she isnt asleep yet. And, then make sure you go back after 5 minutes. It builds trust and she knows you are there for her. I do not recommend staying with her until she is asleep for a month, for example, and then expect it to be an easy transition to leave earlier. Finally, it is also normal for your toddler to go through a phase of having his door open (if it was closed in the first place). He feels connected to the household and it gives him security. As long as it doesnt hinder his ability to sleep, allow him this freedom as long as he stays in bed and follows any other rules you set. The phase will end, eventually.

HYPERLINK "http://members.picknicksbrain.com/ help-your-child-sleep/toddlers-in-bigbeds-getting-up/"Toddlers in Big Beds The Jack

in the Box HYPERLINK "http://members.picknicksbrain.com/help-your-childsleep-step-by-step"Help Your Child Sleep Table of Contents If your toddler is repeatedly getting out of bed, rather than sleeping, and you have ruled out a schedule problem (i.e. bedtime is too early) or security problem, your options are to use one of the above methods and put a gate at the door or employ a return to bed method. To return her to bed, you should first take the opportunity during the day to talk about not getting out of bed at night. You may also want

to implement a sticker chart to reward good behavior. For each night she stays in bed, she gets a sticker and after so many stickers, she gets a small (that wont break your bank) toy or treat (my son liked little matchbox cars). If she does get out of bed, return her to bed without talking or interaction. Any positive or negative reinforcement will continue the behavior, so its important to return her to bed business-like. This takes a lot of patience, but with consistency and determination, will work in the long run. The first two nights are typically the hardest with many returns to bed, but usually after that, with consistency, things should improve. It may come to pass that she is sleeping well and then reverts back. You may have to reassure her the first time, but then stick with the non-interactive return to bed subsequently so you dont end up back in the same place once again. Another option is if your child likes his door open, you can make it a rule he can have his door open as long as he stays in bed. Be consistent! Their job is to test. If he gets out of bed, then the door closes. You must follow through with any threat.

HYPERLINK "http://members.picknicksbrain.com/ help-your-child-sleep/the-toddlerstaller/"The Toddler Staller

HYPERLINK "http://members.picknicksbrain.com/help-your-childsleep-step-by-step"Help Your Child Sleep Table of Contents Ah! So, your toddler is stalling. This is normal, but can get out of hand if you allow it too much. Some ideas to curb this are to set firm

limits and use keywords. I always used Last; Last book, Last time, Last hug, etc. If your child is taking too long brushing his teeth or playing around, just set firm limits that At 7 oclock, we are done with reading books, even if we havent read any. It might only take one time to be too late to read books for him to know next time he needs to be a good listener and get his pajamas on when mommy or daddy tells him to, for example. Or, if he is playing a game, you say Last time and then stop the game and move on to the next step of your routine. Once he recognizes his numbers, you can use the digital clock to help reinforce what happens when its Seven zero zero while pointing to the clock.

HYPERLINK "http://members.picknicksbrain.com/ help-your-child-sleep/the-early-risingtoddler/"The Early Rising Toddler

HYPERLINK "http://members.picknicksbrain.com/help-your-childsleep-step-by-step"Help Your Child Sleep Table of Contents For toddlers waking too early in the morning (and youve already attempted to shift schedules), you may want to consider getting room-darkening blinds. Light cues us its time to start our day and when your toddler sees the light, he probably wants to start to play. A few other ideas: Get a digital clock and let him know when its time to get up (e.g. when the first number is seven), if he knows his numbers. Set up a sticker chart and reward him when he stays in bed, quietly, until a certain time. After so many stickers, he gets a small toy or

prize. Make a rule that mommy or daddy or somebody will come get him when its time to get up and if he gets up beforehand, implement a loss of privilege (i.e. No playing at the park today or no Dora or no Matchbox cars today, etc.).

HYPERLINK "http://members.picknicksbrain.com/ help-your-child-sleep/where-do-istart/"Where Do I Start? What Steps Do I Take?

1. Read this e-Book (Im sure that is self-explanatory. You did not buy it for nothing). 2. Log your childs sleep for one week and get good at detecting their sleepy and overtired cues (for babies under 1 year old). 3. Determine all of your childs sleep problems. In other words, what habits do you want to break? What is your primary goal, specifically? We know you want your child to sleep all night, but specifically what do you want to achieve? An example might be I dont want to have to replace the pacifier 10 times per night or I can no longer rock him for an hour before he will stay down. Write these down if it helps (see worksheet in Appendix C). 4. Decide if you want to work on days and nights together or just one first. Day and night sleep are each handled by different parts of the brain, so you can do one and not the other (see How to Sleep Train for my recommendation). 5. Decide what method you want to use. Write down your plan, if it

helps you stick to it! Be Consistent! Consistency is key! 6. Make yourself a mantra you will repeat to yourself when things get rough. Mine was something like Should I give up? No. Because then he would have gone through this all this time for nothing. My waffling is not fair to him. What is the alternative? Nothing but wasnt working before. He needs to learn how to sleep. 7. Begin your plan and commit to it 100% for at least 1 week before you re-evaluate. You may need to make tweaks here and there. I recommend changing just one thing at a time, so you know whats working and whats not. If you mess up, dont beat yourself up! Just try again next time. This is a learning process for both of you!

HYPERLINK "http://members.picknicksbrain.com/ help-your-child-sleep/concludingremarks/"Concluding Remarks

No one sleep training method will work for everyone and thats why I dont recommend one over another. The method that will work for you and your family is dependent on your philosophy as a parent and the temperament and personality of your child. I cant tell you which method YOU will be able to commit to 100%. Consistency is the key to any methods success. Studies have shown that all of the methods can and do work with consistency. As long as babies know what to expect they will adapt to your familys lifestyle. Sleep training is often not a cure-all. There will be teething, traveling, illnesses, etc. that might set you back along with developmental milestones. Babies change rapidly during their first

year. Thankfully, a previously sleep trained child will bounce back to normal after a setback with just a refresher course. Some people feel they are training non-stop and thats because they have more difficult sleepers. But, for many, there really is no alternative. I slipped back with my eldest son many times because one night staying with him when he was sick led to staying with him for an hour or more when he was better again. I could not continue to rob him of his sleep when it clearly affected his behavior every day. So, we had to train and re-train many times over. Just like a diet can have setbacks, you have to change your lifestyle rather than look for the quick fix. I will say that over time, once my son was good at putting himself to sleep, I could let him fall asleep at bedtime, nursing, and hed continue to sleep all night. He just needed the knowledge and experience first of knowing how to fall asleep without my help all night first. I hope this guide has been helpful for the sleep deprived and it will help lead you to many nights of restful sleep for your entire family.

HYPERLINK "http://members.picknicksbrain.com/ help-your-child-sleep/appendix-afaq/"Appendix A- FAQ

What do I do about traveling? Do I sleep train while traveling? Some people do sleep train while traveling, but it usually depends on where youre going and for how long. If you are going camping for 3 days, its unlikely you will be able to employ any crying methods because you would disturb your neighboring campers. If you are going to grandmas house for a month, you likely wont want to fall

back into bad habits for so long. So, you need to just use your best judgment and just keep in mind the child will be in a foreign place and likely his schedule might be different resulting in more overtiredness, too. Do I sleep train when baby is sick? Again, you need to use your best judgment, but in general, I say not to sleep train while baby is sick. You know how you feel when youre sick, so your baby may need more comforting during this time. Having said that, when baby is on the upswing and you are doing more harm than good helping her to sleep, you may want to leave her alone to get more rest to get better. You know your baby best and you will be able to tell how she is feeling throughout the rest of the day to determine just how miserable she is feeling or not. Do I sleep train when baby is teething? Some experts have said that teething does not disrupt sleep. I disagree. I believe some babies dont skip a beat when they get teeth, but I believe some definitely are affected. Since we cant feel what they feel, I err on the side of caution. I certainly dont remember what it felt like when teeth erupted through my gums for the first time! However, they teethe for what seems like a constant two years and its not good for either of you not to get enough sleep for 2 years! During rough teething patches, give some Tylenol or Motrin (I like the latter better because it lasts longer) and some Orajel (or teething tablets) 30 minutes before bed. That will at least make him more comfortable during bedtime. You may need to re-dose during the night. Usually sleep disruptions only last a few days to a week. Any longer, and you probably have a different sleep problem. After traveling or being sick, how long will it take for him to start sleeping better again?

The good news is that usually, previously sleep trained babies go back to sleeping well after just a couple of days (maybe longer for no-crying methods). How long will my baby cry if I use a crying method? Unfortunately, I cant tell you how long your baby will cry since all babies are unique. However, the average, in my experience with other parents (not my own child, unfortunately, because of his strong-will), seems to be about 30 minutes in a stretch. If you are breaking a pacifier habit, that seems to cause more up and down crying throughout the night, in my experience, but only for a few days (usually). I can also tell you that many people prepare themselves for the worst and their child surprises them by not crying long at all! Will my baby sleep well from now on if I do cry-it-out? Not necessarily, unfortunately. I can tell you that it will probably be 10 times better, but cry-it-out is sometimes not a cure-all, depending on the child. There could be ups and downs along the way as new milestones come up, as your child becomes much more aware of cause & effect, as he learns he can get his way sometimes by crying. All I know is that the method you were using was not working for one or both of you, so it still might be your best option. Only you can decide that, though. What if my baby is rolling over, sitting up or pulling up? Baby learns to roll one way pretty early, but usually not both ways for quite awhile. Even when they can roll the other direction, they dont always think to do it in the middle of the night, so it depends on how you want to handle it. You may be okay with going in and rolling her over a couple times per night or maybe youre not or you

are really doing it 10 times per night. I usually recommend employing a check-and-console type method so you go in at intervals and reposition your baby, periodically, in hopes that one of these times they are waiting they will either learn to sleep on that side, learn to get down if they are pulling up or learn not to pull up in the first place because it gets tiring.

HYPERLINK "http://members.picknicksbrain.com/ help-your-child-sleep/appendix-bquick-age-reference/"Appendix B Quick Age

Reference (What to Expect, When) Here is a timeline of sleep and other milestones in your babys first three years: Week 1: Congratulations! You have a new baby and likely, he sleeps more than anything. He might have day/night confusion. Weeks 2-4: Your baby may begin to get fussy. This is normal. From this age until 6+ months, make sure you keep wake-times a short 1-2 hours to avoid overtiredness. Weeks 5-6: Fussiness peaks. At this point, if you are breastfeeding, you may be wondering if something is wrong with your breast milk or whether you are eating something you shouldnt or you need to switch formula. If you are formula-feeding, you may wonder if you need to switch formulas. Dont worry. In most cases, this is normal and the fussiness levels should start to decrease right on cue after these weeks.

Around this age your baby will probably start to return your smiles. Awww! Weeks 7-8: Earlier bedtime starts to develop and longer periods at night (you hope). Start to watch for bedtime to get to between 6 & 8 p.m. You might just notice his last nap become bedtime as he will be cranky when he gets up from his nap. At this age, he will also probably start to coo and gurgle. Awww! Weeks 9-16: If your baby was colicky, it should start getting better around this age. A morning nap starts to develop. She will likely want her first nap shortly after waking. The first waking of the day is generally the shortest. Short naps (30-45 minutes) are common until 6 months of age. If she is going to bed earlier and getting better rest, she may not need as long of a morning nap anymore. This is the time when some good sleepers start to turn bad (sounds like a bad horror movie). At this age, she may also coo at you, smile and laugh. Some also start to get teeth around this age. Watch out breast feeders! For tips on biting and other breastfeeding concerns, please see HYPERLINK "http://www.kellymom.com/" \n _blankhttp://www.kellymom.com Months 5-6: An early afternoon nap starts to develop and he will begin to take 2-3 naps, rather than 3-4. The morning wake-time will still likely be under 2 hours, but as your baby gets closer to 6 months old, the wake-times throughout the rest of the day may get a bit longer as you get closer to being able to nap him on a schedule. At this age, he is likely imitating sounds you make, rolling over, and possibly starting to crawl! They change fast, dont they?!

Months 7-8: You can start napping your child on a schedule, which will make planning activities and errands much easier. A typical schedule might be 7(wake)-9(nap)-1(nap)-4(nap)-7(bed). This is just a guideline as some babies might need less wake-time first thing in the morning and more, later. Or, your baby may not sleep 12 hours and you will need to adjust bedtime. Some babies also dont have a 3rd nap. While we consider a nap restorative only if its longer than 1 hour, the 3rd nap is generally only 30-45 minutes, if they have one at all. If he doesnt have a 3rd nap, you might be better off spacing the naps more like 7(wake)-10(nap)-2(nap)-7(bed). Your baby might be crawling by now (if not, dont worry! My son did not crawl until 10 months and then walked 3 weeks later. He always liked being on his feet). He may also be saying mama or dada but not meaning it. Month 9: If your baby had a 3rd nap, it will likely disappear by this month. It is also generally accepted that your baby no longer needs to eat at night. Again, all babies are different. Some wont need to eat at night as early as a few weeks old and others might need an early morning feeding up through a year old. This is a developmental milestone and not related to solids, breastfeeding, etc. Your baby may be able to stand now while holding onto something. Watch out now! Shell be walking before you know it! She also may be eating finger foods and playing pat-a-cake and peak-a-boo. Month 10-12: A small number of children start to transition to just one nap around this age. Also, the 9th or 10th months is known for some sleep regressions while he is reaching a lot of milestones such as cruising, possibly saying mama and dada to the correct parent, crawling well, waves good-bye, etc. By 12 months, hes indicating wants with gestures, understands no and simple instructions, and may be taking a few steps on his own!

Months 13-18: Most children transition to one nap between 15 and 18 months. By 18 months, your baby is probably saying at least a few words and possibly stringing phrases together. You may start to see tantrums, if you havent already. Terrible twos generally start before they actually turn 2. Yay. Experts generally encourage you to stop giving bottles between 15 & 18 months, if not sooner, because this is the age they get more emotionally attached and long-term bottle use is supposed to contribute to tooth decay and speech delays. Months 19-24: Almost all children are on just one nap by 2 years old. Although the age a child transitions to 1 nap is mostly concentrated within a 6-month range, losing the nap entirely has a far wider range. Some lose the nap by as early as 2 years old and others still nap until they go to kindergarten and beyond.