Help Wanted - Spongebob Squarepants Transcripts

Narrator: Ah, the sea. So fascinating. So wonderful. Here, we see Bikini Bottom, seeming with life. Home to one of my favorite creatures, Spongebob Squarepants. Yes, of course he lives in a pineapple, you silly. (Spongebob is sleeping when his alarm goes off. He turns it off.) Spongebob(chris): Todays the big day, Gary! (climbs a ladder) Gary(aida): Meow! Spongebob(chris): Look at me! Im naked! (jumps off the board and lands into his pants then walks over to stuffed animal weight lifting set.) Gotta be in top physical condition for today, Gary. Gary: Meow! (Spongebob inhales deeply then lifts the weight slowly eventually getting it up then throwing it back down) Spongebob(chris): Im ready! (runs out of house and on to the Krusty Krab) Im ready. Im ready. Im ready. I'm ready. Patrick: Go Spongebob! (falls off rock and into big hole) Spongebob(chris): There it is. The finest eating establishment ever established for eating. The Krusty Krab: Home of the Krabby Patty. With a Help Wanted sign in the window! For years Ive been dreaming of this moment! Im gonna go in there, march straight to the manager, look em straight in the eye, lay it on the line andI cant do this! (runs back but runs into Patrick) Patrick! Patrick(fyqa): Where do you think youre going? Spongebob(chris): I was just... Patrick(fyqa): No youre not. Youre going to the Krusty Krab and get that job! Spongebob(chris): I cant, dont you see? Im not good enough! Patrick(fyqa): Whos first words were, 'May I take your order?' Spongebob(chris): Mine were. Patrick(fyqa): Who made a spatula out of toothpicks in wood shop? Spongebob(chris): I did. Patrick(fyqa): Whos a...(thinks hard)...uhh...whos...whos a big yellow cube with holes? Spongebob(chris): I am! Patrick(fyqa): Whos ready? Spongebob(chris): Im ready! Patrick(fyqa): Whos ready?

Spongebob(chris): Im ready! Patrick(fyqa): Whos ready? Spongebob(chris): Im ready!! (jogs to the Krusty Krab where we see Squidward wiping off a 'loser' painting on the doors) Squidward(yanty): Oh no, Spongebob. What could he possibly want? Spongebob(chris): Go Spongebob! Go Spongebob! Go self! Go self! (Squidward notices the 'Help Wanted' sign on the window and runs to tell Mr Krabs) Squidward(yanty): Ahh! Mr Krabs! Mr Krabs, before its too late, I gotta tell you about... (Spongebob opens front doors) Spongebob(chris): Permission to come aboard, captain! Ive been training my whole life for the day I could finally join the Krusty Krew, and now Im ready. (trips and bounces everywhere then stops) So, uh, when do I start? Mr Krabs(aida): Well lad, it seems like you dont even have your sea legs. Spongebob(chris): Mr Krabs, please. Ill prove Im fry cook material. Ask Squidward, hell vouch for me. (Squidward takes Mr Krabs into a private conversation) Squidward(fyqa): No. (Mr Krabs wink) Mr Krabs(aida): Well lad, well give you a test and if you pass, youll be on the Krusty Krew! Go fetch me a hydro-dynamic spatula with, uhh, port and starboard attachments, and turbo drive! And dont come back till you get one! (puts a Krusty Krab hat on Spongebob. Spongebob looks in the mirror to admire it) Spongebob(chris): Aye aye, captain! (reads list off notepad) One hydrodynamic spatula, port and starboard attachments, turbo drive, coming right up sir! Mr Krabs(aida): Carry on lad! Well never see that lubber again. Squidward(yanty): Youre terrible! A hydro-what? (both start laughing then Mr Krabs hears a sound) Mr Krabs(aida): That sounded like hatch doors! (Mr Krabs sniffs something) Do you smell it? That smell. The kind of smelly smell. The smelly smell that smells smelly. (wide eyed)Anchovies. Squidward(yanty): What? Mr Krabs(aida): Anchovies! (anchovies swarm in and surround the boat) Squidward(yanty): Please, please, quiet! Is this any way to behave, hmmm? Anchovy(aida): Meep! Squidward(yanty): Could we show a little decency and form a neat, single file line in front of the register? (anchovies pick up and boat and sway it side to side)

Spongebob(chris): Barg N-Mart: Meeting All Your Spatula Needs. Squidward(yanty): One single file line was all I asked! Mr Krabs(aida): Button down the hatches, Mr Squidward. (thrown up again) Were taking on water, Mr Squidward. (thrown up again) I want my mommy, Mr Squidward! Spongebob(chris): Spatula, spatula, port-and-starboard attachments. Mr Krabs: Climb, Mr Squidward! Climb! )both climb the wooden poll to the top where the anchovies can't reach them) Well, this is the end. Good-bye, Mr Squidward! Squidward(yanty): Oh Mr Krabs! (red light flashes as Spongebob comes flying in with his spatula) Spongebob: Did someone order a spatula? (Mr Krabs and Squidward question each other on the confusion) One hydro-dynamic spatula with... (two spatulas come from the side of the actual spatula) ...port and starboard attachments, and lets not forget the turbo drive! (pushes a button and the 2 side spatulas slap Mr Krabs and Eugenes around and around) Could you believe they only had one in stock? To the kitchen! (to anchovies) Whos hungry? (Loving in the Moonlight song plays while Spongebob makes a lot of patties) Mr Krabs(aida): That was the greatest fast-foodsmenship Ive ever seen, Mr Squarepants! Welcome aboard! (puts a nametag on Spongebob) Squidward(yanty): But Mr Krabs... Mr Krabs(aida): Three cheers for Spongebob! Hip-hip! Squidward(yanty): Hooray, Mr Kr... Mr Krabs(aida): Hip-Hip! Squidward(yanty): Hooray, Mr... Mr Krabs(aida): Hip-hip! Squidward(yanty): Hooray, Mr Krabs! Mr Krabs(aida): Ill be in my quarters, counting the booty. (takes his wheelbarrow full of money to the back. Then Patrick walks in) Patrick(fyqa): Good morning, Krusty Krew! Squidward(yanty): What would you like to order, Patrick? Patrick(fyqa): One krabby patty, please. (Spongebob flies back to the kitchen and throws patties at Patrick) Squidward(yanty): Mr Krabs! Mr Krabs! Mr Krabs, come see your new employee!