CAO NI MAMA, BU-XING-DI!

IT IS NOW AUGUST 45, the third August of our internment, and the stress is beginning to tell. A lot of people are getting on edge, some are close to cracking, one for sure has already cracked. He or she is an axwielding maniac who has taken to decapitating cats, those forlorn strays which on wandering in through the wire were instantly clutched to the bosom of our incorrigible cat lovers. (Yes, cat lovers persisted in our midst as they persist in every society under the sun.) And then there is that strange case of lay preacher Garth Jergens, a long-armed orangutan of a man, who gulps down his lamp oil issue the moment he receives it, who at full moon climbs the tallest tree so he can ll the high heavens with blood-curdling wolf calls. Up till now, I was relieved that Tai-tai was bearing camp life with stoic grit. But that hadn't always been the case. Mrs Attree, mother of Bessie and Lucy, told me that two years earlier (when I was back in Pootung) Taitai was on the brink of suffering a nervous breakdown when told that her son, my half-brother Tony, had been arrested by the guards and was to be turned over to the dreaded Kempetai. This terrible news came on top of her ceaseless anxiety over the fate of her husband Jim Lambert, and her three Power boys Pat, Brian, and Jocelyn, all serving in the armed forces. Tony's crime was buying eggs from Chinese peasants through the barbed wire fence. He had been caught red-handed, severely beaten, and locked up in the guard house. It so happened that that very same fate befell the Irish Australian Trappist Monk, Father Patrick Scanlan, who
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too was caught dealing with the peasants not only for eggs but also native hootch, Baigar, said to be fermented with pigeons' manure. But Stone The Crows! With the good Australian Trappist the Japanese got a lot more than they bargained for. At three in the morning he broke into wild screeching Trappist litanies (Yes, as a wartime measure Trappists were freed from their vow of silence) the Japanese sent him packing. He deed them demanding that Tony also be set free. And he was. It should be remembered that the good Trappist had the power of the Vatican behind him, and such power the Japanese chose not to challenge. But Tony too had outside help. Some woman in the camp, Tai-tai never learned who, went to the Commandant's ofce with a news clipping describing how Tony had pulled a drowning Japanese soldier from the surf at Peitaiho.

To ease Tai-tai's anguish, Father Scanlan brought Tony straight to her hut. Her gift of the tongue and amboyancy and above all her resolve matched his, and they were soon friends. When he and the hundreds of other Catholic clergy were ordered to transfer from the camp to quarters in Peking he came to say goodbye and leave her with a can of plum jam to which he attached this note.
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And now, into her third year of internment what a wonderful uplift for her when a Red Cross letter arrived from her rst husband's sister in Ireland, Margaret Grifn Power! She let out a cry of triumph when the letter told her that all three of her boys, Patrick, Brian, and Jocelyn had so far survived the war.

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I pride myself for keeping mostly on even keel. After all, Im a veteran of three camps. Come to think of it, Ive been under three different Commandants. Not many can claim that. I say mostly on even keel because from time to time I am not myself, but under the power of the Devil. I stay on the balcony of our second oor dormitory when the roll call bell sounds. And when I would normally be taking my place in line, I stay put, gazing idly down at the men and women of Block 24 being shepherded to their mustering point by that portly, blustery nincompoop, Sergeant Bu-xing-di. He is called Bu-xing-di because he is forever yelling at all and sundry bu xing this and bu xing that. (Bu xing being Chinese for no can do and the di ending similar to the er in such English words as ghter, singer, etc.) Its been about a year now since that pompous blusterer, affronted by his sobriquet, took it up as a grievance with Commandant Izu. And to oblige him, the Commandant posted an order on the camp notice board stating: It is forbidden to call Sergeant Bu-xing-di, Sergeant Bu-xing-di. Henceforth everyone must, under pain of punishment, address Sergeant Bu-xing-di as Sergeant Sato! But back to my moment of devilry. Before I can stop myself, I am shouting out for the whole world to hear that most profane of Chinese profanities: Wo cao ni mama! (I copulate with your mother.) Bu-xing-di stops dead. He cocks his head, puzzled. He cant make out where the shouted curse is coming from. Still under some terrible demonic inuence, I raise my voice even louder: Bu-xing-di, wo cao ni mama! (In naming him, I am implying that he is the result of my copulation.) He spots me. He springs for the building entrance. Instantly myself again, I make a mad dash for the stairwell where we line up, one inmate to a stair. And just in time, for Bu-xing-di is already half-way up the stairs, ranting like a mad bull. Close on his heels, interpreter Al Voyce is sweet-talking him. It has no effect. The enraged beast comes to a ponderous halt and puts a throttle hold on the rst person within reach, David Clark, a youth of fourteen, fatherless and motherless in camp, he is the ward of the beloved Reverend Simms-Lee of the Anglican Church. I dont need the gauntlet of eyes to tell me what I must do. My nodding head and foolish smile ought
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to assure Brian Clarke and Mike Boycott and Speed Murray and Art Kerridge and John Simmonds and Steve Shaw and all the rest that I know what I must do, and that Im going to do it. But rst a gulp of air to combat the icy constriction in my lungs. That buys me time to reconsider. Surely there must be some other way. There has to be. But there is no way. So this is it? Game over! As if detached from myself, I step forward. Between hasty gasps I force out in a thin falsetto: Shi wo, shi wo. (It was me, it was me.) The brutish grip on my shirt front lifts me off my feet and thrusts me back and forth like a rat in a terriers jaw. The stairwell spins. The block monitors pleas sound vaguely in the distance. Then the blows begin, but they are not the nose-crunching, lip-splitting blows delivered with the edge of the hand, which everyone knows can crack a millstone, rather they are motherly pats to the cheek, and each pat accompanied by a peevish chide mouthed in Mandarin the tones all wrong: Huai haizi, bu xing, bu xing. (Naughty boy, no can do, no can do.) Afterwards, Brian Clarke (who like me had been transferred from Lunghua) grips me by the hand as he shakes his head. You crazy damned fool, you were lucky to get away with it.
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He never said a truer word. Talk about luck! If it had happened six months earlier when the Japanese were still cock-a-hoop, I wouldnt be here to tell the tale. Easy to see why our captors were no longer so sure of themselves; they were losing on all fronts. We knew that from reading between the lines of the Peking Chronicle. And when that paper stopped coming in, we still kept abreast of world events simply by scanning the Japanese dailies, many of us capable of interpreting the root Chinese of their Kanji script. But came the inevitable day when no amount of grubbing about the guards dust bins would land us an Asahi or Tokyo Shimbun. We existed in a vacuum, the ideal breeding ground for rumors. There was that electrifying report of Russia declaring war on Japan and the mighty Red Army sweeping through Manchuria. But then our hopes were dashed when one of the more dependable guards told Bobby Grandon that Russia had indeed launched an all out attack, but not against the Japanese in Manchuria they were crushing the British and American armies in Germany. When my number came up to have my teeth checked (nothing really wrong with them) by the camp's dentist, Dr Wentworth Prentice, he let out before seating me in the chair that Japan had surrendered and that the war was over.

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On Main Road, George Cox hailed me then burst out that Father De Jaegher was telling everyone that the war was certainly over. It took the rebuttal of Dr Mortimer Brown, the celebrated author of The Taoist Inuence In Shinto Thought, to bring us back to earth. Wishful thinking, he spoke up at a gathering in Peking Kitchen. Were stuck here for another two years at least. Lieutenant Tominaga, a Berkeley grad and Berkeley men, as everyone knows, are above lying has just advised me of the stunning victory won by the Imperial Japanese Navy in the seas near Okinawa. They sent two US battleships and three eet carriers to the bottom. And thats not all. The Kamikaze, the divine wind which saved Japan so miraculously in the thirteenth century, has dealt the US eet such a blow that Subic Bay is now a graveyard of American ships. Admiral Nimitz has gone stark raving mad . . . General MacArthur has been relieved of command . . . President Truman is suing for terms. . . . The cold certainty of Dr Browns statement sent our spirits plummeting. We were down in our deepest dumps when word spread that Mr McLaren was going to make an earth-shaking announcement in Tientsin Kitchen quadrangle. He arrived with John Stewart of British American Tobacco and Sandy Cameron of Hongkong Shanghai Bank. Three taipans! Couldnt be any more ofcial, the news they were about to disclose. Ladies and Gentlemen, announced the good Mr McLaren. We have reason to believe the war is over. We ask you to remain calm, to carry on as usual. Well keep you informed of developments. No questions, please. No questions. . . . So what was so earth-shaking about that? Wed heard that rumor a dozen times or more. And carry on as usual? For how long? When the day ended, then another, and yet another, and still the same routine, lining up for roll call, for a watery meal, for the toilet, black despair engulfed the camp. . . . What do you think, sir? What should we believe? I asked Major Evenden in Tientsin Kitchen. Take it from me, young fellah, the war is over. The Commandant will have to come out with it any moment now.
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The USAAF beat the Commandant to it. On August 17th 1945, at exactly nine oclock in the morning, an almighty blast just about shook our dormitory building off its foundations. We gazed goggle-eyed at one another. What the heck was that? . . . Train crash? . . . Earthquake? . . . Dynamite? . . . Shut up, Brian Clarke snapped. Listen. Cupping my ears as he was doing, I picked up the drone of airplane engines, now faint, now dying away, now coming on palpably. The others heard the same. We scrambled outside. We searched the sky. Vincy Murray broke into a high-pitched squeal: Look, there, over there. Where? Cant you see? Over by the hills. Then I spotted it, way out on the horizon, the silhouette of a plane, its bulky shape much like one of those transpacic clippers we used to see on pre-war Movietone News. Now it was hovering, now it was turning, ever so slowly, until its nose was pointed at the camp. And Jiminy Crickets, it was coming straight towards us, low, almost at tree-top level, and the nearer it came, the more incredible its size, the more deafening its engines, until with a stunning shock wave, it wooshed overhead. In that split second of ear-popping concussion I caught sight of a pink hand waving in a gun turret. Waving hand! Must tell the others. Too late. They were
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charging helter-skelter for the ball eld. When I caught up with them they were all pointing up at the plane sailing gracefully towards us. About a quarter of a mile away it began ejecting bundle-like objects from its belly, and in a trice the objects blossomed into parachutes. Lets go, someone yelled out, and that was enough to start a frantic stampede for the gate. What about the guards? No guards, theyd evaporated. I charged through the gateway and quickly gained on stragglers wandering aimlessly along the mud road. No aimless wandering for me. I had a pretty good idea where those chutes came down. They must be there to the right, in that eld of mature seven-foot-high gao-liang. I swerved off the road and thrashed my way through the closegrowing inch-thick stalks. Not a sign of life. I burst out of the gao-liang and into a stand of millet. Still nothing. I ploughed on. Then I saw it, there on a path beside a grave mound, a length of green and brown fabric lying in folds. I inched towards it. Hands up! Freeze! I froze. From behind the mound rose a gure straight out of Flash Gordon exotic spacemans helmet gaudy one-piece space suit. Even the miniature carbine he had trained at my middle was an instrument of death from some other planet. The only give-away that he might be a mere earthling were the strips of common sticking plaster attaching his spectacles to his nose and temple. Dont shoot, I choked out, Im British. Im from
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an internment camp nearby . . . Ammurrka has got a gigantic bomb . . . was all I caught of the burst of words he red at me. Like an imbecile, I shrugged my shoulders and shook my head. He repeated in a at monotone: Ammurrka has got a gigantic bomb . . . super bomb . . . dropped two and killed ourselves half-million gooks . . . And still those words, for me the very rst of the new post-war era, refused to sink in. We were standing gazing warily at each other when two men from the camp came plunging through the waist-high millet. They threw themselves on the Martian, they hugged him, they slapped his back, they kissed him. Tears were streaming down one mans cheeks. You saved us, you saved us, we were all about to die. (What a b!) Is the war really over? the other gasped out between sobs. Ammurrka has won the war, the deadpan paratrooper was back to his monologue. Ammurrka has got the biggest goll-darndest bomb in the world . . . super bomb . . . Hiroshima and Nagasaki zapped . . . killed ourselves a half-million Japs . . . MacArthur is sitting on Hirohitos throne calling the shots . . . It took a second Martian to switch him off. This one, borne shoulder high by adulating internees with a string of others dancing attendance, red a volley of unintelligible jargon at us. And our Martian countered with a volley of the same. Was this strange lingo the lingo of the Brave New World? If so, we were going to have a lot of learning to do. But not right now. Right now, our hero reverted to proper John Wayne English. Okay buddies, we gonna head for your camp. Give us a hand with the chute. Two idolizing inmates jumped instantly into action, gathering and bundling up the tangles of cord and heavy green and brown fabric. In triumphant procession we passed under the ceremonial arch and into the Courtyard of the Happy Way. The main road was a bedlam of people screeching and bellowing and dancing the madmans jig. Someone grabbed my arm. The wars over! Weve won! Someone else pounded my back. The Americans have invented a wonderful new bomb. They dropped ten on Japan.
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Wiped out ve million Jappos! Not ve million, eight million, a jubilant beetrootfaced man cried out. Tokyo, Nagasaki, Yokohama, Hiroshima, all turned to ash. Bloody marvelous! Absolutely marvelous! Everyone was pushing and shoving towards the Commandants courtyard. I squeezed my way in. Mr McLaren was standing on a table, waving his hands, calling for silence. All he got for his trouble was a chorus of rude epithets. But when a Martian ofcer got up on the table there was instant silence. I am Major Staiger of the OSS. I can conrm to you that the Government of Japan has agreed to Allied surrender terms. What I cant tell you though is how the Japanese army in the eld is going to react. Its possible they may refuse to obey Emperor Hirohitos order to lay down their arms. The Japanese garrison in Weihsien might turn on us. To calm your fears I want you to know that I have sent a message to their commanding ofcer advising him were here on a humanitarian mission. After witnessing the horrors of the prison camps in Europe, we were expecting the worst here. Its a great relief, let me tell you, to nd you alive and kicking. Now, Im sure your rst and foremost desire is to get out of this place. Im afraid that might take some days, maybe a week, to arrange the necessary transportation, but you can rest assured well do our best to speed you out. In the meantime Ive radioed for more supplies, and for more support personnel. I must ask you now to exercise patience. Youve stuck it out for the best part of three years; you ought to be able to manage a few more days. For your own safety Im going to insist that you stay strictly within the walls of this camp. Im going to ask your senior representative to organize a security team to police the exits. Also, the Japanese guards will retain their arms; Ive given orders that they continue guarding this place as before. . . . Someone in the crowd let out a boo. It didnt faze the major. He just went right on: Im afraid weve no alternative. Theres a lot of ghting going on in the countryside around us. The Chinese are locked in a bitter civil war. No one is to leave this place. Thats an order, and its for your own good. Now, if you dont
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mind, weve had nothing to eat since dawn. Wed like to share lunch with you. Mr McLaren raised his hand to squelch the shouts of laughter. Then, smothering his own smile, he said to the major: Youre welcome to dine with us though you might not nd it quite up to the Ritz. Accepting the invitation was the biggest mistake of the majors heroic mission. He and his men came down with an unrelenting dose of the trots. Just as the OSS hero had promised, more Americans arrived next day, but not by chute; they came in a C47 transport that landed at the Japanese fighter airstrip at Erhshihlipu ve miles to the south. With their typical informality and openness, they quickly mingled with the internees.
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Arriving on the next plane was a rotund army major, his re-orientation team at his heels. First thing we gonna do, he announced, is re-orientate you folks. Can see you need it real bad, so gonna do it real good. As if on cue, a plane roared overhead and scattered leaets over the camp advising prisoners of an impending airdrop of supplies.

We weren't given the chance to witness this marvellous event. Our new won freedom came starkly to an end. We were under new orders. "Everyone to the church hall sharp at three to learn about the new United Nations, its charter, its establishment in San Francisco last April.
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The business-like re-orientation team set to work stringing cables, and in jig time had powerful loudspeakers installed on all the main buildings. At six next morning we got our rst taste of reveille. But no bugle call; we were jolted awake by a powerful baritone rendering of Oh What A Beautiful Mornin. It seemed our friendly disk jockey couldnt give us enough of that rousing song. He played it again. And then again. And he squeezed it in between People Will Say Were In Love and Kansas City and Surrey With The Fringe On Top. Occasionally, he relented and put on other hit tunes denied us during our lost years: Sentimental Journey, As Time Goes By, and so on. But then he was back to his favorite, now the camps theme song, Beautiful Mornin. Complaints hit Mr McLaren thick and fast, some demanding the volume be turned down, some an after breakfast start, some a total ban on that ghastly racket. I was not one of the complainants. I never tired of that music then, and I never tire of it now. Buzzing here there and everywhere, the tubby orientation major was forever demanding our attention. His voice would come over the loudspeaker: Now hear this hear this hear this all prisoners (meaning his prisoners) are to present themselves at 1:00 p.m. in the church hall to see a lm on the surrender of Germany. Next day, he was at it again. Prisoners are to attend a lm sharp at seven this evening to view the atrocities committed by our German and Japanese enemy. He meant it when he said sharp at seven. When I arrived at 7:05, he was well into his school marmish introduction: . . . You people seem bear no ill will toward your enemy. You demonstrate a curious couldnt care less attitude. But I suppose that can be forgiven. You are obviously unaware of the inhuman crimes that have been perpetrated. Well, well put that right. You are going to be orientated. You are going to observe in living color what the Japs did in the Philippines, what the Krauts did in Poland . . . And what we observed was ghastly beyond imagination. If it dazed even those of us more or less sound of mind, what did it do to the ones teetering on the brink of
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mental breakdown? Impossible to believe that the Major could be so insensitive. Could the war have warped his mind, turned him as callous as the very monsters the shining knights in armor of the Great Democracy had so gallantly set out to put down? We began avoiding him by stashing ourselves in places where we were not apt to be seen.

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