Contents

snuffing snuffleupagus: the blunt naivet of tea party power

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february 24, 2011 volume 6 issue 21

Publisher Paul Blake paul@columbiacitypaper.com ArTs eDiTOr Judit Trunkos jtrunkos@columbiacitypaper.com cOlATheATer.cOm S.M. Baleem, Garrett Kellerhals Design Lisa Corbin music Kingsley Waring
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News.Politics.Commentary.
regional briefs confrontation with knife sparked by food stain cover the latest teabagger target commentary supreme court Justice clarence thomas should resign vocal booth black history month music John mellencamp at township conservation hotlist. 3 5 6 10 11 12

Movies.Entertainment.Etc.
soundboard punk/indie/emo/ska/hardcore/metal/rock movie review movie times at the nick and big mo drive-in savage love adult sex advice Jonesin crosswords cartoons derf & red meat sudoku 10 12 12 13 14 14 15
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AccOunT execuTives James Wallace, Jen Snyder DISCLAIMER: The crosshairs depicted on the front cover are really just geological surveyor marks. Wink-wink, SP. cOnTribuTOrs S.M. Baleem, Garrett Kellerhals, WR Marshall, Todd Morehead, Will Moredock, Ted Rall, Dan Savage, Kingsley Waring, Baynard Woods cOlumbiA ciTy PAPer 2965 North Main Street Columbia, SC 29201 803.218.9455 (DiaL aRea CoDe)

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CHARLESTON MUSC Charlem doc suspended The MUSC researcher who recently gained international fame for his plans to grow meat in-vitro has been suspended indefinitely and his lab has been shut down. MUSC officials said Dr. Vladimir Mironov has been placed on indefinite paid leave, surrounding a series of issues, according to the Charleston Post and Courier. Mironov reportedly received a letter from the university citing unacceptable behavior involving his contact with a university administrator that constituted an act of insubordination and ultimately led to his suspension. As the meat lab hangs in limbo a concern for animal rights group PETA, which is co-funding the researchothers in the medical community are more concerned about the future of Mironovs work in a separate $20 million project that aims to create human organs from a persons own stem cells. The project is funded by the largest grant the National Science Foundation has ever awarded to South Carolina. PETA President Ingrid Newkirk told the Post and Courier she has not yet talked to MUSC and criticized the university for being closed mouthed about details surrounding Mironovs suspension. Its clear theres a huge ruckus going on there, she said, but a lot of lives depend on this research. They may not be on two legs, but they depend on Mironov being back at his lab bench. GOOSE CREEK Woman sues after bra dye leads to skin discoloration A Goose Creek woman has filed suit against Wal-Mart, the Haynes Corporation, and other corporate litigants claiming that a bra left her skin discolored for years. In the suit, filed in Berkeley County, Cherrill Bennett alleges that a black bra she bought at Wal-Mart in 2008 left a

black bra-shaped stain on her skin that remains to this day. [The stain] fit perfectly under where the straps were, Bennetts attorney, Jarrel Wigger, told the Post and Courier. [The markings] stopped right where the cup was. Wigger further described the markings as a burnt color. Bennet was unavailable for comment. So far the defendants have not filed a response, according to the report.

The victim later identified Smith to police, who was then charged with strongarm robbery. SPARTANBURG Woman pulls pistol over fish sticks Spartanburg County sheriffs deputies were called to the scene of an argument that originated from a man throwing fish sticks into a womans hair. According to a police report, the argument between Farrah Elizabeth Peeler, 33, and an unidentified man was still in full swing when officers arrived. Though deputies found no gun at the scene, Peeler admitted to pointing a gun at the man after he threw fish sticks at her. When Peelers son stepped between them, Peeler reportedly told him to move or she would shoot him, too. Peeler admitted to pulling the gun but denied threatening her son. Peeler was charged with aggravated criminal domestic violence.

MYRTLE BEACH Confrontation with knife sparked by food stain A Myrtle Beach man escaped injury after his girlfriend threatened him with a knife over food stains on his clothing. According to Myrtle Beach police, the 56-year-old man said his girlfriend became suspicious that he had cheated on her after finding odd stains on his pants while doing the laundry. When the man rose to grab the bag of clothes during the ensuing SUMMERVILLE argument the woman grabbed a knife and Woman accused of driving into threatened to stab him if he hit her. crowd of school children Police arrived on scene and separated Summerville Police say an area the couple. No charges were filed. woman plowed into a crowd of school children on a recent morning after they ROCK HILL refused to move out of the way of her car. Man robs teen girl for money for Amy Lynn Stewart, 34, has been Valentines Day gift charged with four counts of assault and Rock Hill police have arrested a battery in the first degree following the man for allegedly snatching $20 from a incident. 16-year-old girl to buy a Valentines Day According to Summerville Police gift for his own teen daughter. Capt. Jon Rogers, Stewart came upon The victim told police she had just a group of children walking to Alston parked in the driveway of her residence Middle School on the shoulder of the road when Todd Eugene Smith, 38, approached at an intersection. When Stewart honked her asking for money. Smith allegedly her car horn and the children wouldnt said that he wanted to buy his daughter clear the way, Rogers says, she drove into a Valentines Day gift, kerosene, and/or the crowd striking one 14-year-old, two food. The victim offered Smith a can of 13-year-olds, and one 12-year-old. soup in her car and when she leaned over Dorchester County EMS took one of to grab it, the report states, Smith noticed the children to an area hospital. The child a $20 in her back pocket and demanded it. was later released. Bail for Stewart, who When the victim gave it over, he fled the reportedly has no prior record, has been scene on foot. set at $40,000.

february 24, 2010

He and his wife have both taken money from groups that would love to influence the outcome of Supreme Court cases. There is no place for such shenanigans in our judiciary.
not be stupid, he is crooked and immoral. Many of the problems come from his wife. Of course, she insanely called Anita Hill and left a message asking for her to apologize. Its worth thinking about the moments preceding that call. What psychological situation could have compelled her to find the number, pick up the phone, and make that telephone call. Then, when Dr. Hill didnt answer for Christs sake, how drunk do you have to be to leave a recorded message. But thats just the beginning of the problem with Mrs. Thomas. At the time she called Dr. Hill, Mrs. Thomas was the CEO of Liberty Central, a Tea-Party group. The group, which paid her a hefty salary, had a vested interest in many of the cases that her husband might rule on. In November, she stepped down as CEO so the group might pursue its radical agenda without any of the distractions. Late last month, a watchdog group reported that the Thomases failed to report her $685,000 income from the conservative Heritage Foundation over the last five years. On his financial disclosure form, Thomas checked that the income of his wife was none. Most of us dont live the kinds of lives ruling on the landmark Citizens United case, which ruled that corporate money was equated with free speech and allowed corporations to spend money directly on political campaigns without disclosing the source of the money. The Koch brothers have been among the main beneficiaries, of the ruling, the New York times reported last week. Thomas, of course, voted in favor of Citizens United. Dont get me wrong, I believe in activist judges. I think people are wrong when they think that the judiciary should follow public opinion. The purpose of the judiciary branch of government is to have free individuals to make unpopular decisions, decisions that defend the minority of one against the tyranny of the majority. But this is not what Thomas did. Instead, he and his wife have both taken money from groups that would love to influence the outcome of Supreme Court cases. There is no place for such shenanigans in our judiciary. In the midst of all of this impropriety, Justice Thomas would do best to step down from the Court. It is the right thing to do for the good of the country.

Supreme Court Justice Clarence Thomas should resign. He got off to a rocky start, of course, but this last year has been one full of outrageous blunders, missteps, and violations of ethics. I have to say, Ive always thought he was a dick (as big around as a coke can). Until a couple years ago, that is, when 60 Minutes interviewed him. There, he talked about his Gullah roots and his grandparents and he seemed ok. He was neither as stupid nor as inarticulate as most of his detractors thought (It has been five years since he has asked a question from the bench). Well, now we see that, though he may

where we can forget over a hundred thousand dollars a year. Now it turns out that it is not just Mrs. Thomas with questionable associations. Justice Thomas himself was paid by the conservative Federalist Society for attending a retreat in 2008. At first the Justice said he just dropped in, but his financial disclosure reports show that the Federalist Society funded by the radical activist Koch brotherspaid for an entire weekend getaway. Now an advocacy group Common Cause is claiming that because of Thomas relationship with the Koch brothers, Justice Thomas should have recused himself from

february 24, 2011

by Jaroslav Dampfstain Unless you have been living in Oscar the Grouchs garbage can the past few months, you are probably aware of the fact that the insidious Tea Baggers who have recently sprouted like crabgrass all over the national political landscape have, en masse, repositioned their gun sights on public broadcasting. Unfortunately, these short-lived panjandrums are about to learn that it is just as politically witless to aim a budget-cutting Beretta at a Muppet as it is to put a U.S. congresswomens photo in virtual crosshairs. At the national level, Colorado Republican Congressman Dan Lamborn authored legislation that would make it illegal for Uncle Sam to fund NPR and PBS after 2013. The elephant-controlled U.S. House Appropriations Committee concurs in principle with Representative Fuckwad and in fact seeks to chop funding to the Corporation for Public Broadcasting next year to the tune of nearly one-half billion dollars. Such a cut would effectively eliminate ten percent of NPRs annual revenue and more than fifteen percent of PBSs annual revenue. For those who are mathimpaired, imagine Cookie Monster has 200 cookies. Take away 26 of those cookies. Now think of how much extra pledge drive time Cookie Monster has to waste before he can concentrate on stuffing his face with yummy treats and teaching children how to pronounce the letter C. For what it is worth, let us compare Republican-proposed cuts to public broadcasting with the cuts the GOP has proposed to the U.S. military budget. The
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february 24, 2011

2010 U.S. Department of Defense budget is $685.1 billion. Now, imagine Cookie Monster has 685,100,000,000 cookies. According to the House Republican plan to shave $60 billion from the federal budgetwait, this just in! The Republican have zero intent to decrease overall military spending. In fact, they intend to add 8.1 billion cookies next year! Any comments, Cookie Monster? Cookie Monster like being G.I. Joe! Me no like being silly mechanics from Car Talk. What do Republicans have to say about their obvious hypocrisy to eviscerate educational public broadcasting yet increase spending on the bombing of civilian wedding parties in the Middle East? Listen to the wisdom of Congressman Fuckwad of Colorado: This effort to cut government spending [and rape public broadcasting] should be part of the larger push from the new Republican Congress to cut spending and get our nations fiscal house in order. [brackets mine] Here is another gem, this time from U.S. Speaker of the House John Boehner: Our goal is to listen to the American people and liberate our economy from the shackles of debt, over-taxation and big government. A similar attack on public broadcasting occurred in the name of fiscal responsibility at the state level during Governor Haleys January State of the State address. In what is likely the biggest Palmetto State political gaffe since Thomas Ravenel sucked white powder up his nose through a rolled dollar bill, Haley openly declared jihad on South Carolina ETVs $9.6 million budget linewhile ETV production

Jesus Christ, Senator, even Libya has public broadcasting! So what does this War on Grover and Terry Gross mean?

crews were faithfully serving the general public by broadcasting her speech to all corners of the state! Ashley Landess, head of the South Carolina Policy Council, came to the governors defense with the following political tampon: Its [a matter of] whether or not the state should be paying for them. Sorry, Ash. The bleeding cannot be stopped. The damage is done. No political drycleaner can erase Nikkis State of the State stain. I simply cannot resist giving Senator Jim Fuck the Muppets Demint the final word in Haleys defense: Its time to draw a clear distinction between the government and entertainment. Democrats shouldnt cast our childrens most beloved creatures as characters for their big-government, big-spending causes. Publicly funded media simply has no place in our modern, tech-savvy society. To which I respond: Jesus Christ, Senator, even Libya has public broadcasting! So what does this War on Grover and Terry Gross mean? At both state and national levels, the Tea Baggers have committed the ultimate political cardinal sin. Instead of engaging in subtleties and palace intrigue to fulfill their heinous, execrable agenda, they have opted to shoot their wads the moment the dream prom date makes a move for her brassiere clasp.

The U.S. electorate is witnessing almost immediately that these hateful libertarians and Mammon teat-suckers who ascended to power in the last election cycle really are as brazen and stupid as we thought they were. Which is a good thing for voters who simply wanted to give Tea Bag fiscal conservatism a chance. Consider an example from history: What if, when Hitler rose to power in 1933, he had immediately ordered the Brown Shirts to round up all the Jews and toss them in the Baltic? It seems impossible to imagine that the German people would have collectively lost their marbles in a 24-hour period and allowed this to happen. It took time to seduce an entire nation to madness. While Hitler was always keen on the idea of eradicating the world of Jews, the Final Solution was not an outright Nazi policy until the Wannsee Conference, which occurred almost a full decade after the burning of the Reichstag. Hitler was crazy. But he bided his time, and he nearly succeeded in accomplishing several of his diabolical ends. (Ironically, if one does ones homework, one realizes that Allied public broadcasting helped bring about the demise of Nazism.) The Republicans of the 112th Congress, on the other hand, do not have the brains and wherewithal to slowly cook the frog. They want what they want. And they want it now. And they arent embarrassed to hit you in the face with legislative brass knuckles to get it.

They see illness as an opportunity to rid the planet of poor people especially poor children. They want Elmo and the hosts of All Things Considered to be gassed and cremated. They see medieval serfdom and corve labor as economic models worth revisiting. They want your children to be smart enough to put on a welding helmet and no more. They want gay people to turn straight. Or die. They want black people to turn white. Or die. They want university laboratories to be renovated into evangelical places of worship. They want the world stripped of all its natural resources and turned into an Arrakis-like wasteland, whilst the endangered species list is converted into a Happy Meal menu. They are eager to steal the gold-plated toilets of world despots, so long as the despots crap atop fields of oil. And they want bombs. Bombs, bombs, bombs. And guns; dont forget guns! Give that Negro President a five-minute head start, then start taking potshots! This is the Tea Party agenda. And as the voters of Wisconsin are learning rather quickly, the time to act is NOWbefore its too late. Like I said, even Libya has public broadcasting. Hell, even the Third

If by liberally-slanted you mean engaged in promoting civilization rather than destroying it, then hell yes. Sesame Street taught me the ground rules of diversitynot to mention the alphabet and numbers!

Reich had public broadcasting. Only the most nave among us think that savvy Republicans policymakers (what few are left) really want to do away with public broadcasting. They are happy to jump on the Tea Bag bandwagon at present, if that is what it takes to rip away the microphone and television camera from the progressive intelligentsia. Here is the real Republican strategy: they want to burn PBS and NPR, then add some water to the ashes and create a GOP media golem that serves the

political interests of corporate elitism and conservative fanaticism. Kind of hard to imagine a Fox News version of Antiques Road Show, isnt it? Or is it? Well, we had no idea it was in our attic, but my husband was up there last week and can you believe he found this poor black boy? I know he has a couple of chipped teeth, but we think hell do well at auction. Are NPR and PBS liberallyslanted? If by liberally-slanted you mean engaged in promoting civilization rather than destroying it, then hell yes. Sesame Street taught me the ground rules of diversitynot to mention the alphabet and numbers! And Newtons Apple told me the truth about geologic epochs. At the same time, I dont recall Mr. Rogers instructing me to get an abortion, nor Noah Adams denying the existence of God and encouraging me to do heroin. In the end, maybe we should just let the Tea Baggers get their hands on the public radio and television strings for a year. I can only imagine Glenn Beck running up and down Sesame Street, rounding up all the Muppet monsters and sending them to Guantanamoall except for Abby Cadabby, whom he keeps locked in his closet and forces to engage in acts of bestial bukkake with Big Bird and Snuffy. As America continues to see these nut jobs for who and what they really are, I have to believe we will come to our senses as a nation and kick their ass in 2012. Otherwise, within a decade, were fucked. talkback@columbiacitypaper.com
february 24, 2011

Greetings!!! Black History Month is currently underway and there is a plethora of events happening. From the What It Means To Be Black Live Forum @ Benedict College (February 22nd) to the Say It Loud Black History Celebration @ The Kwanzaa House (February 25th on Monticello Rd.); Black History is HAPPENING!!! Much love to Columbia City Paper for supporting the various community events through out Columbia. Since this is Black History Month music, here are 28 Black History music facts. Lets get it!!! REVIEW Black music is the foundation of not only Americas musical blueprint, but also the world. Originating in Africa and spreading globally, black music has done much to shape and influence how this world spins. Gospel, Classical, Reggae, Blues, Jazz, Disco, Zydeco, Folk, Country, Electronic, Hip Hop, and even Rock music can all directly trace their roots straight back to the voice and drumbeat of the African. Here are some great facts to remember 1) Marian Anderson, a gifted contralto singer, was the first AfricanAmerican to perform with the New York Metropolitan Opera in 1955. 2) Deford Bailey was a wizard at playing the harmonica, and was most notable for mimicking the sound of locomotives. He was the first AfricanAmerican to perform at the Grand Ole Opry and one of the first African-American stars of country music. 3) Singer and pianist, Nat King Cole was the first black American to host a television variety show. 4) Baritone opera singer Todd Duncan became the first African-American to sing in a major opera company when he became a member of the New York City Opera in 1945. 5) In 1959, Ella Fitzgerald became the first African-American woman to earn a Grammy Award. She won five awards that year, including an award for best jazz soloist and one for best female pop vocalist. february 24, 2011 10

6) Soul singer Aretha Franklin became the first female artist to be inducted into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame in 1987. 7) Grandmaster Flash and the Furious Five became the first rap group to earn induction into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame. 8) African-American disc jockey Hal Jackson became the first radio personality to broadcast three daily shows on three different New York stations. He was inducted into the Radio Hall of Fame in 1995. 9) In 1950, AfricanAmerican Mahalia Jackson became the first gospel singer to perform at New Yorks Carnegie Hall. 10) Matilda Sissieretta Joyner Jones was the first African-American opera singer to perform at Carnegie Hall

in New York. 11) Black Swan Records, founded in 1921 by Harry Pace in Harlem, was the first U.S. record label owned and operated by African-Americans. It was originally the Pace Phonograph Corporation and was renamed Black Swan Records after the 19th century opera singer Elizabeth Taylor Greenfield, who was known as the Black Swan. 12) Charley Pride (1938 - ) is one

of the most successful African-American country singers of all time, with a career spanning over 40 years and 36 number one hits. He is also the first AfricanAmerican to be inducted into the Country Music Hall of Fame in 2000. Pride was a baseball player with the Negro League and the Memphis Red Sox before becoming a successful musician. 13) Singer and actress Della Reese was the first black woman to serve as guest host of The Tonight Show. 14) Hip-hop group RunD.M.C. became the first rap act to appear on the cover of Rolling Stone and make a video appearance on MTV. (RIP Jam Master Jay) 15) Musician and composer, William Grant Still, was the first African-American to conduct a major American symphony orchestra and the first to have a symphony of his own performed by a leading orchestra. 16) Singer and performer Ethel Waters became the first African-American star of a network television show. The sitcom, Beulah, was about a cook and housekeeper of the same name. 17) Jazz drummer William Cozy Cole broke Billboard records in 1958 with the single Topsy, when it became the only drum solo to sell more than one million records. 18) In 2006 Whitney Houston, a celebrated singer, songwriter and actress, was named the most awarded female artist of all time by the Guinness World Records. 19) In 1980, singer and performer Michael Jackson secured the highest royalty rate in the music industry37 percent of the albums profit. (CASH RULES EVERYTHING AROUND MERIP MJ) 20) Pop icon Michael Jackson has earned several Guinness World Records, including Most Successful Entertainer of All Time for his 13 Grammy Awards, 13 No.1 singles, and the sale of over 750 million albums worldwide. (pay attention Elvis) 21) Music composer and producer, Quincy Jones is the most Grammy-nominated artist in the history

of the awards with 76 nominations and 26 awards. 22) Jazz, an AfricanAmerican musical form born out of the Blues, Ragtime, and marching bands originated in Louisiana during the turn of the 19th century. The word Jazz is a slang term that at one point referred to a sexual act. 23) Louis Armstrong bought his first coronet at the age of 7 with money he borrowed from his employers. He taught himself to play while in a home for juvenile delinquents. 24) Musician and activist Harry Belafonte originally devised the idea for We Are the World, a single that he hoped would help raise money for famine relief in Africa. The single became the fastest selling in history, making more than $20 million worldwide. 25) Before becoming a professional musician and the founder of Rock & Roll, Chuck Berry studied to be a hairdresser. 26) Chester Arthur Howlin Wolf Burnett was one of the most important blues singers, songwriters and musicians, influencing popular rock groups like The Beatles. Unlike many blues artists, Howlin Wolf maintained financial success throughout his life, held a stable marriage, and avoided drugs and alcohol. 27) Rap artist Chuck D (founder of Public Enemy) has a bachelors degree in graphic design. He has also crafted arguably the greatest Hip Hop song ever with Fight The Power (from the album Fear Of A Black Planet-1990). 28) DJ Jazzy Jeff & The Fresh Prince (Will Smith) were the first rap group ever to win a Grammy for 1988 classic albumHes The DJ, Im the Rapper, that included the chart topping single Parents Just Dont Understand WORDS OF WISDOM Know your true history; people get paid big money to lie to you!!! Any band or artist looking for more exposure, be sure to contact me. Stay Up!!!! DJ Kingpin-Villain Of kingpinvillianofvinyl@gmail.com Vinyl

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february 24, 2011

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Thursday February 24 New Brookland Tavern Charming Hala Octopus Jones The Sea Wolf Mutiny Emily McCollum Utopia Open Mic w Brett Mello The White Mule Lee Nestor Friday February 25 New Brookland Tavern Invader Prowler Cast Of Shadows Granthems Asylum Utopia Total Denial The White Mule Matt Ranck (early show) Yo Soybean with Rosanna Hendrix (late show) Saturday February 26 Art Bar Alien Carnival, THE Dubber, Marshall Brown, The Mobros New Brookland Tavern Evergreen Terrace Boys No Good

This Day Will Tell Barriers Do Your Worst Township John Melloncamp Utopia Lucia & Levi (The little zippers) The White Mule Inine w Tyler Boone & Death of Paris Sunday February 27 New Brookland Tavern Porter Hall Tennessee Captial City Playboys The White Mule Don Russo student showcase Monday February 28 New Brookland Tavern NBTs Acoustic Competition Finals w/: Jesse Isley, Mario &, Deborah & Chase, Jamie DiCiurcio, Jade Tuesday March 1 New Brookland Tavern The Protomen The N.E.C. TBA The White Mule Dr. Sketchy

Wednesday March 2 New Brookland Tavern 5:30 Behold The Messenger I Call Fives Kid Liberty Rust Belt Lights Forgetting Fera 10pm Panderosa Leslie Thursday March 3 New Brookland Tavern Franz Nicolay David Dondero TBA Utopia Open Mic w Marz Ward The White Mule The Mosier Brothers (founders of blueground undergrass) w/ Granville Automatic & Natty Boh Duo Friday March 4 Utopia John Scollon & Harros Gardner The White Mule Louise Warren with Emily McCollum (early) Yarn with Andy Friedman (acoustic late)

Saturday March 5 Art Bar Cassangles, Coma Cinema, Backseat Dreamer New Brookland Tavern Kopecky Family Band Dylan Gilbert TBA Utopia Flat Out Strangers Sunday March 6 New Brookland Tavern Sons Of Young Kid Anthem Aphatos Minimum Wage Monday March 7 New Brookland Tavern NBTs Musician Appriciation Night $1.50 PBR, $3 Jagermeister $4.25 JagerBombs & Jim Morrisons Tuesday March 8 New Brookland Tavern Deleveled Grey Market Head Space The Awake

I would rather performers like John Cougar avoid Columbia like the plague...let them play Augusta or Charleston. So with that in mind hes the pick of the week in the hope that loyal CCP readers go and boo the hell out of him. I would also hope for some rotten fruit to be hurled you know go old school....

perhaps some of the more well traveled readers will hurl durian which doesnt have to be rotten to produce a well noxious odor. Dont buy a ticket in advance... wait for the show to start and get a cheap ticket from a scalper outside. Then let him know that you dont care. music@ columbiacitypaper.com

02/25/11 :: Friday The Woodgrains efren The Hypsys Max Canada Athens, GA Randall Bramblett Melting Point Athens, GA

Road TRip
Brantley Gilbert Coyote Joes Charlotte, NC Marc Hoffman Founders Hall Charlotte, NC Seth Glier The Evening Muse Charlotte, NC Bang Tango Tremont Music Hall Charlotte, NC Chasing Edison Visulite Theatre Charlotte, NC Dreamkiller The Rock Shop Fayetteville, NC Paul Cataldo Thirsty Monk South Asheville, NC Ryan Bonner Home Team BBQ Charleston, SC Celtic Woman North Charleston Performing Arts Center Charleston, SC Big Gigantic Intermixture ZOOGMA The Music Farm Charleston, SC The Malah Gottrocks Greenville, SC Domino Effect The Rock House Tybee Island, GA The Toughcats The Showroom @ Hub-Bub Spartanburg, SC The Last Straw Fiery Rons Home Team BBQ Sullivans Island, SC 02/26/11 :: Saturday Miniature Tigers Brian Bonz The Get Up Kids 40 Watt Club Athens, GA Archnemesis Kraddy New Earth Music Hall Athens, GA The Burning Angels The Flicker Theater Athens, GA The Suex Effect The Office Lounge Athens, GA The Malah Word of Mouth Walter Parks Savannah Station Savannah, GA Lingo Buffalos Statesboro, GA The Mantras Vertigo Jazz Project Kung Fu Dynamite Grey Eagle Asheville, NC Uh Huh Baby Yeah! The Nova Echo Lexington Avenue Brewery Asheville, NC Arpetrio Duende Mountain Duo Mo Daddys Asheville, NC Big Gigantic ZOOGMA Orange Peel Asheville, NC Paul Cataldo StraightAway Cafe Black Mountain, NC Frankie Valli and the Four Seasons Belk Theatre Charlotte, NC Sol Driven Train Neighborhood Theatre Charlotte, NC Loretta Lynn Sonia Leigh Ovens Auditorium Charlotte, NC The Lettermen Crown Coliseum Fayetteville, NC Kem El Debarge Ledisi Crown Coliseum Fayetteville, NC Acoustic Syndicate Catawba Valley Brewing Co Morganton, NC Charleston Symphony Orchestra Gaillard Auditorium Charleston, SC Old 97s Those Darlins The Music Farm Charleston, SC Brantley Gilbert Blind Horse Saloon Greenville, SC John Prine Old Crow Medicine Show Peace Center Greenville, SC Sarah Peacock Twisted Lemon (formerly MoJos) Greenville, SC Matt White Brendan James Downstairs Live North Augusta, SC

The Packway Handle Band New Earth Music Hall Athens, GA Mason Douglas Terrapin Brewery Athens, GA The Train Wrecks Huc a Poos Tybee Island, GA Floating Action Emerald Lounge Asheville, NC Nikki Talley French Broad Brewing Co. Asheville, NC Jimkata UltraViolet Hippopotamus The Garage at Biltmore Asheville, NC

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february 24, 2011

Crosstown Friends Bar and Grill Belmont, NC

Defending against rollbacks of environmental protections has always been a Common Agenda priority. This year, a number of bills aim to undermine the management of South Carolinas fragile coastal resources. Two harmful bills will be considered by the House Environmental Affairs I Subcommittee (Rep. David Hiott- Chair, Bill Crosby, Chandra Dillard and Chris Murphy) on Thursday, Feb. 24 at 8:30 a.m. in Blatt Room 410. The Marsh Canal Dredging bill (H.3587, Rep. Tracy Edge) would allow the US Corps of Engineers to permit maintenance dredging by counties or municipalities of manmade recreatio! nal use canals conveyed to the State before 1970. Although the bill aims to permit dredging for a specific canal at Cherry Grove, it would open the door for increased dredging of coastal wetlands that are now under the protection of the Coastal Zone Management Act. The Pier Bill (H.3586, Rep. Nelson Hardwick) would allow the construction of piers seaward of the OCRM baseline as long as they are approved by the local governmental body having responsibility for planning and zoning. This bill inappropriately shifts the authority to allow construction seaward of the baseline from OCRM to entities that do not have the necessary experience or authority to adequately manage our coastal resources. Click here to email members of this Subcommittee to ask that they vote NO to these bills that will degrade our coasts. In the House Phosphorus Bill (H.3470, Rep. Dwight Loftis) and Three Strikes Sewage Polluter Bill (H.3617 by Rep. Mike Pitts) PRIORITY The House Agriculture and Natural Resources Subcommittee (Rep. Paul Agnew- Chair, Tom Corbin, Patsy Knight and Steve Moss) discussed both of these priority bills last week and heard testimony from the conservation community. The Subcommittee had a positive response and ultimately voted Rep. Mike Pitts Phosphorus Bill, H.3470, out of Subcommittee with a favorable report. (The Subcommittee decided to use Rep. Mike Pitts phosphorus bill, H.3470 as the vehicle, not the Rep. Loftis bill, H.3467, which only has minor differences.) H.3470 would prohibit the use, sell or manufacture of dishwashing

detergents containing phosphates, a harmful chemical found in our lakes and rivers. Phosphorus is already banned in 15 states because it kills fish and lowers recreational revenues and home values. After much discussion, the Three Strikes Bill, H.3617, was carried over for further consideration at the next Subcommittee meeting to allow stakeholders&n! bsp; time for negotiations. H.3617 would require any utility with three spills over 5,000 gallons in a 12-month period to undergo a comprehensive audit of what caused the spill and fix the problems identified. The conservation community continues to work with the wastewater utility industry to craft a bill that treats all utilities fairly and helps chronic violators come into compliance. Marsh Canal Dredging (H.3587, Rep. Tracy Edge) and Pier Bill (H.3586, Rep. Nelson Hardwick) OPPOSE

The Environmental Affairs I Subcommittee (Rep. David Hiott- Chair, Bill Crosby, Chandra Dillard and Chris Murphy) will meet Thursday, Feb. 24 at 8:30 a.m. in Blatt Room 410 to discuss two potentially harmful bills. H.3587 (sponsored by Reps. Tracy Edge, Thad Viers, Nelson Hardwick, George Hearn, Alan Clemmons and Liston Barfield) would allow maintenance dredging by counties or municipalities of manmade recreational use canals conveyed before 1970 to the State for that purpose if the maintenance dredging is authorized by a permit from the United States Army Corps of Engineers pursuant to the Federal Clean Water Act, as amended, or the Rivers and Harbors Act of 1899. All other department administered certifications for such dredging are deemed waived by the bill. We oppose this bill because it would allow the dredging of coastal wetlands that are currently protected under state law. H.3586 (sponsored by Rep. Nelson Hardwick, Alan Clemmo! ns, Dwight Loftis, Tom Corbin, Liston Barfield, Anne Thayer, Andy Patrick, George Hearn, Chris Murphy, Kevin Ryan, Thad Viers, Eric Bedingfield, Tracy Edge, Bill Herbkersman,

A number of bills aim to undermine the management of South Carolinas fragile coastal resources

Jenny Horne and Tommy Stringer) would allow the construction of piers seaward of the OCRM baseline as long as they are approved by the local governmental body having responsibility for planning and zoning. The conservation community opposes this bill because it inappropriately shifts the authority to allow construction seaward of the baseline from OCRM to entities that do not have the necessary experience or authority to adequately manage our coastal resources. Click here to email members of this Subcommittee to ask that they vote NO to these bills that would degrade ! our coasts. Natural Resource Agency FundingPRIORITY Forestry, agriculture, outdoor recreation and tourism account for $54 billion, or about one-third, of our economy. Thats over 450,000 jobs, or 25% of all jobs in South

Department of Agriculture the authority to make, purchase and insure agri-business loans. An Agriculture Subcommittee (Rep. Marion Frye- Chair, Bill Chumley, Joe McEachern and Tommy Stringer) will meet to discuss this bill Tuesday, Feb. 22 at 2:30 p.m. in Blatt Room 410. In the Senate Prescribed Fire (S.501, Sen. Ronnie Cromer) SUPPORT S.501 provides greater protection for landowners who choose to conduct prescribed burns on their property, and promotes the most efficient and cost effective forest management tool within South Carolina. The full Fish, Game and Forestry Committee (Sen. Ronnie Cromer- Chair, John Land, Yancey McGill, Dick Elliott, Brad Hutto, Chip Campsen, Jake Knotts, Mike Fair, Kent Williams, Paul Campbell, Larry Grooms, Danny Verdin, Vincent Sheheen, Creighton Coleman, Shane Martin, Mike Rose and Phillip Shoopman) gave this bill a favorable report last week and sent it to the full Senate. Yucca Mountain (S.92, Sen. Ryberg) SUPPORT This is a concurrent resolution to urge Congress to endorse Yucca Mountains sustainability as a permanent federal repository for high-level radioactive waste. The full Senate Agriculture Committee (Sen. Danny Verdin- Chair, Lee Bright, Kevin Bryant, Paul Campbell, Chip Campsen, Tom Davis, Dick Elliott, Larry Grooms, Brad Hutto, Jake Knotts, Phil Leventis, John Matthews, Yancey McGill, Mike Rose, Vincent Sheheen and Kent Williams) will meet Wednesday, Feb. 23 at 10:00 a.m. in Gressette Room 209 to discuss this bill. Energy Resolution (S.96, Sen. Larry Grooms) MONITOR The full Senate Agriculture Committee will discuss this resolution at the aforementioned Wednesday meeting. S.96 would ask South Carolinas Congressional delegation to oppose federal cap and trade legislation and to support legislation that encourages the development of state renewable energy portfolio standards. (Cap & trade bills failed in last years Congress and are no longer being pushed as a means of reducing carbon pollution.) Provided by Conservation Voters of S.C.
february 24, 2011

Carolina. However, the combined budgets of South Carolina Agriculture Department, Forestry Commission, Department of Natural Resources (DNR) and Department of Parks, Recreation and Tourism account for less than one percent of the state budget. The full House Ways and Means Committee (Rep. Dan Cooper - Chair, Rita Allison, Mike Anthony, Liston Barfield, Jim Battle, Kenny Bingham, Bill Clyburn, Gilda Cobb-Hunter, Tracy Edge, Bill Herbkersman, Lonnie Hosey, Chip Huggins, Chip Limehouse, Dwight Loftis, Jim Merrill, Joe Neal, Denny Neilson, Harry Ott, Mike Pitts, Gary Simrill, B.R. Skelton, Murrell Smith, Roland Smith and Brian White) will meet Tuesday, February 22 at 10:00 a.m. in Blatt Room 521 to begin budget deliberations, which will continue throughou! t the week. Email your legislator and ask him or her to support natural resource agency funding. Agri-Business Economic Development Act (H.3633, Rep. Dwight Loftis) SUPPORT This bill would help boost South Carolinas rural economy and alleviate the shortage of capital and credit available in the agribusiness sector, by giving the

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I am a straight man. From high school through college and after, I loved me some women. Then I met my present girl 10 years ago. I fell head over heels for her. I still love her. But, little by little, she has become boring to me. Our sex life has cooled. Days run together with mundane activities like watching TV, going to the store, and hanging out with our kids. We own a house, were financially stable, we look very traditional. But I am far from conservative. I love nightlife, crazy friends, and good drink. She was aware of this when we met because we ran in the same circles. My boredom is compounded by a craving for sex with other women. It doesnt matter whothe girl at the coffee shop, the checker at Whole Foods, every chick at the gymIm up to my eyeballs in covet. I want out. I want to be a father to my kids and take care of my wife financially. But I want out. I am a few years from 40. What is the best course of action? Too Young To Flail

SavageLove
Sex advice by Dan Savage

by Matt Jones

That Certain Chemistry--watch where you drink.

in 1995 over sexual harassment charges 54 Viking achievements, for short 55 Behind closed doors 56 I Love You (___ Least I Like You) 58 Bombshell 59 What this grid is decidedly not (but baby-safe plastics are) 62 Picks apart a sentence 63 Where mad villains get locked away 64 Like the kid who rarely gets hand-me-downs 65 Prefix before -topian 66 And many more

Jonesin crosswords

planning to spend on lawyers and counseling for your kids on flying grandparents in to look after the kids while you two head out for a weekend away. But if all she wants is to stay at home in front of the TV with the kids, tell her that to preserve your sanity and, paradoxically, your marriage, youre going to go out and have some adventures on your own. If she leaves you over it, TYTF, then you got what you wanted: out. Im a 31-year-old lesbian. My girlfriend is in her 30s, but save for a few one-night stands, she has never been with a woman before. Ive never had better sex than the sex Im having with her. When I try to talk to her about this, she gets anxious and makes self-deprecatory comments. I want to be with her for the long haulour dreams fit togetherI just need to figure out how to communicate with her about how great our sex is. Got any advice? Communication Breakdown Yeah, CB, Ive got some advice for you: Shut the fuck up. I had this awesome new boyfriend once, and the sex was so freaking great that I felt compelled to communicate with him about how great it was. This is so great, I would tell him. Lets try to figure out where all this greatness is coming from! But he didnt enjoy talking about sexparticularly while we were having sexand he got so annoyed with my attempts to figure out where all this greatness was coming from that he eventually asked/advised/ ordered me to shut the fuck up. Keep fucking the girlfriends fucking brains right fucking out, CB, but shut the fuck up. Odds are that shell learn to relax and open up about sex, like my boyfriend did. But in the meantime, CB, try to resist the urge to lesbian this thing into the ground by communicating it to death. For several months now, Ive had a growing attraction to one of my good male friends. I am an open bisexual male, and my friend is straight. Weve had relationsme blowing him, him jerking mebut hes adamant that he is not attracted to males at all. He nevertheless sleeps with me in my bed when he spends the night. The plot thickens: A couple days ago, my straight crush ordered an eight-inch dildo, molded from a real dick, complete with balls! He got it to use on himself! He says because theres not going to be another male present when he uses it, and thus no romance, the act will be straight. I define being sexual as enjoying not only the sexual interactions possible between preferred genders, but also the emotional satisfaction, or romance. Does he have a point? Absolutely Hate Acronyms Wasnt there another male present when you were giving him blowjobs, AHA, and he was jerking you? Maybe if your straight friend wasnt accepting blowjobs from another man and swore on a stack of vintage Playboys that he would be fantasizing about a lady-parts-having womanperson pegging him when he jams that dildo up his ass, then maybemaybehe could be believed when he claims to be a straight dude into anal penetration. But a guy who fails to mention a burning desire for pussy to shore up his straight credparticularly in conversation with a dude who blows himand instead falls back on a lame no homo rationalization (Hey, its not like the dildo brought me flowers or anything gay like that!) is a lot of things, but straight aint one of em. If your straight friend manages to fuck some sense into himself on that dildo, AHA, you might want to take a turn on it yourself. mail@savagelove.net

One day, Im gonna throw my hands in the air and declare that, from that blessed day forward, I shall no longer tinker with the machinery of monogamy. That day hasnt arrived, as I still have mortgage payments to make and opposite marriages to saveso heres a little tinkle for you: You say you want out, TYTF, but are you sure about that? In her book I Dont: A Contrarian History of Marriage, Susan Squire asks: Why does society consider it more moral for you to break up a marriage, go through a divorce, disrupt your childrens lives maybe forever, just to be able to fuck someone with whom the fucking is going to get just as boring as it was with the first person before long? (Emphasis added.) Writing about Representative Christopher Craigslist Congressman Lee last week on Balloon Juicea blog I read dailyBJ contributor Mastermix said: If we want to do something about the high divorce rate, we might want to get real [about] the role of a discreet, mutually-agreedupon affair as a safety valve. In other words, TYTF, destroy the only home your kids have known and put yourself and the wife through the hell of divorce, and heres what happens next: You dog around for a few years and before long you shack up with a new womana woman who might want or already has a kid or two of her ownand a few years after that, youre trapped in another monogamous relationship that bores you, and a few years after that, youre writing to ask if you should put your second wife and your new kids through the pain of a divorce, all so you can make an embarrassing pass at a barista who has zero interest in fucking you. Instead of putting your current familyand your hypothetical second family and that poor baristathrough that, TYTF, why not risk leveling with the wife youve got now? Your marriage is already on the ropes, TYTF, so you dont have a lot to lose. Ask to have a safety valve installed on your marriage in the form of permission to have a discreet, mutually-agreed-upon affair, should the right opportunity/barista present itself/herself. It may not be a pleasant thing for your wife to hear, but Im leaving you to go fuck a barista to be named later wont be music to her ears, either. She may surprise you, TYTF. Its entirely possibleI hope youre sitting down for this that you bore her just as much as she bores you. If shes itching for a few adventures of her own, social and sexual, then spend whatever money you were

Across 1 Some gas stations 4 Melodic offshoot of punk rock 7 Pirate, slangily 13 MTVs VMA statuette 15 Do something as a favor 16 It was big for everyone to have one in the 1990s 17 Sewing machine foot pedal 18 ___ Esurance (cartoon spy in TV ads) 19 Actress Nicollette 20 Training subject for a 60-down 22 Theyre paired up in science classes 24 Honduras home 26 It may be hard to follow 27 King, in Cancun 28 Tropical 1980s Robin Williams comedy 34 Ron behind the Pocket Fisherman 35 Triply 39 Kansas States all-time winningest womens basketball coach 43 Children ___ Lesser God 46 Ear-related prefix 47 Missile storage building 48 Oregon senator who resigned

Down 1 Rolls-Royces parent company 2 Eerie Edgar 3 Recovers from a night on the town 4 Forwarded item 5 ___ Carta 6 Capital ___ (credit card company) 7 More in need of massage 8 Roger who left At the Movies 9 Actor Delon 10 Knight ___ (media company purchased by McClatchy in 2006) 11 Staring with an evil bearing 12 Minute 14 Weekend Edition network

17 ___ be awesome! 19 Gp. with shelters 20 Letters on Soviet rockets 21 ___ Alto, CA 23 Place to belly up to 25 Troys buddy, on Community 29 Diner staple 30 Neighbor of Greece: abbr. 31 Addams Family cousin 32 Thar ___ blows! 33 Makes a mistake 36 Question about a rumor 37 Chilly 38 The Dukes of Hazzard spinoff 40 Hands on the table 41 1.008, for hydrogen: abbr. 42 As well 43 San Luis ___, California 44 Franco-Italian cheese 45 Cockamamie 49 Honi soit qui mal y ___ 50 Spotty breakouts 51 Family symbol 52 ___ daisy! 53 Carts for hauling 57 Org. whose first champs were the Houston Oilers 59 Awesome, at one time 60 See 20-across 61 PC key 2011 Jonesin Crosswords, Inc. (editor@jonesincrosswords.com)

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