Cycle of Violence

(Adapted from Dr. Lenore Walkers The Battered Woman, 1980, Harper and Row)

Domestic violence differs from normal relationship tension and disagreements in that, incidents of abuse or violence generally repeat themselves in a fairly clear pattern. Victims of domestic violence do not live in situations of continual abuse; instead, there are periods in the violence cycle when abuse is not present. This does not mean that the abuse is random. There are specific phases to the cycle of violence that have been studied and well documented in the violence research. The cycle is made up of three repeating phases: 1) tension building; 2) battering incident; and 3) the honeymoon

The First Phase of violence is the Tension-Building period. During this phase the batterer engages in increasingly abusive behaviors such as name-calling, constant criticism, harassment, public embarrassment and humiliation, and minor battering incidents. The victim typically reacts to these behaviors by rationalizing and/or denying the behavior and not recognizing that this represents the beginning of a cycle. This denial and rationalization reinforces the perpetrators need for power and control and the victim often reacts by withdrawing and avoiding contact with the perpetrator so as to not set him or her off.

When the tension increases to a level above minor battering, the Second Phase of the violence cycle begins, the Battering Incident. This phase is represented by an act of physical, emotional, or sexual violence against the victim, often accompanied by severe verbal abuse. It is typically short in duration, but the physical and emotional injuries inflicted by the batterer may take a lifetime to heal. The perpetrator of domestic violence does not understand or acknowledge his/her anger during this phase, and the victim tends to blame herself/himself for provoking the abusive act. The victim usually minimizes the abuse and the perpetrator quickly forgets what happened. Enter the Phase, the Honeymoon Stage. Because the victim will often respond with anger or threats after the abusive incident, the perpetrator begins to feel that he/she must apologize and act lovingly to the victim. This stage is characterized by the giving of gifts, flowers, compliments, promises to change, and other non-threatening behavior on behalf of the perpetrator to the victim. This type of

behavior encourages the victim to stay in the relationship and strengthens his/her sense of hope for positive change. Unfortunately, the cycle of violence is usually continuous. Without a change on behalf of the victim, Phase Three leads once again into Phase One Tension Building.

HE MANY FACES OF DOMESTIC VIOLENCE SOCIAL ABUSE The woman is forced to live in an isolated fashion. She is prevented from having social, family or other contact. The partner forbids family or friends from visiting and makes it difficult for her to see them.

PHYSICAL VIOLENCE Includes pushing the women around, slapping, kicking, "strangling", head-butting, burning with cigarettes, battering, punching or using a knife or weapon. It can also involve violence towards property or pets, including throwing things, smashing up the house, destroying possessions which mean a lot to the woman and cutting up her clothes. Violence can also take other forms either alone or in combination.

SEXUAL ABUSE The man forces the woman to perform sexual acts against her will, uses pornography against her wishes, uses force, threats or coercion to obtain sex, makes her perform sexual acts distasteful to her. Rapes - stabs - kills. However stressed, inadequate or drunk, the man chooses as his target the person who is a physical, emotional and economic disadvantage to him (often taking care not to hit her where the injuries will show). Frequently he will be charming to others, making it difficult for the woman to persuade them that she is being abused and causing others to disbelieve that their friend, relative, neighbour or work-mate could be violent at home.

ECONOMIC ABUSE PSYCHOLOGICAL, EMOTIONAL OR The man assumes control of all finances and keeps VERBAL ABUSE the woman chronically short of money. He claims The woman is constantly criticised by her partner. the income support and wages are "his", spending He calls her ugly, stupid, a bad mother. He mocks, the family income on drink and drugs, not putting her down, humiliating her, ridiculing her in allowing the woman access to money for company. He intimidates her, using angry essentials, sometimes humiliating her by not threatening gestures, (or looks when in public) giving her enough money to buy underwear or driving the car recklessly to scare her, threatening sanitary protection. He sabotages her attempts to violence, self-inflicted injury or suicide. He yells,

get a job.

swears, blames, accuses the woman of having affairs with anyone she has been speaking to. The woman is harassed by the partner who follows her, checking up on her, timing her when she goes shopping or collects the children from school. He keeps weapons around which scare the woman, insisting she does things he knows scare her, threatens children pets or her family.