CASTRO, ARLYN F.

N302 Three Phases of Love What is the difference of choosing in love, falling in love, and being in love? To answer that question we must first define love in a medical context. Love isnt just fodder for poets. For as long as people have been falling for each other, scientists have worked hard to locate the roots of love somewhere in the body. The ancient Greeks and medieval men of medicine believed that imbalances in bodily fluids like phlegm and blood were responsible for that weak-kneed, goofy-smiled condition of longing, but as early as the 1660s researchers had begun to grasp at the brains role in romantic love. Modern-day scientists know a lot more about how the emotion works it involves the brains reward centers and pleasure chemicals like dopamine but its still up for debate whether science or poetry describes it better. Thomas Willis, the father of modern neurology and the leader of a group of doctors, chemists and philosophers known as the Oxford Circle, was the first to suggest that the brain was responsible for many of the emotional and reactive human behaviors. His 1667 encyclopedia of diseases of the brain included love sickness as a neurological reaction to falling in love. Love, he believed, was the result of certain chemicals dancing along the nerves. In this way, he introduced the idea that emotional and mental phenomena could be the result of physiological occurrence. The three statements can be defined as the phases in which a person experience the magic of love. Choosing in love is when a person is given a choice to love or not to love or to choose the person to love. The first step in being in love is of course you must be willing to be in love. Its like the moment when you choose to go shopping. In order for you to shop, you should choose to be in a shopping mall without being forced to be there. It is a choice. It is either you live your life hating or choosing to love the world. Falling in love is the second phase. It is a phenomena when you become sleepless, you get euphoria or an intensely good feeling when you see the person you love smile back at you, that feeling when you find out the person you love likes you the same way that you do, the feeling of being head over heels and that youll do risky things just to be with that person. It is that child-like feeling when a little kid finally gets the toy he really wants that he doesnt want to be separated from that toy wherever he goes, even when he sleeps, he takes it to bed with him. Being in love is the last phase of love. It is slightly similar to falling in love but the only difference is that when even if youve known all the persons flaws, all of his shortcomings, and imperfections you still choose to be in a relationship with that person. You still take a leap of faith and taking the risk in keeping him for the rest of your life or losing him even if it hurts. It is when you already are in a relationship. Being in love is the main attraction in a boxing match, the major work-out

after a warm-up, and the climax in an action movie. In my definition, the three phases should be in order. You cant fall in love first when you still have hatred in your heart and not choosing to love. It is irrational to be in love when you didnt even have the feeling of falling in love. Being in love is the final test. When you fail to be in love and did not manage to keep the love alive, another phase which is falling out of love will take place. We dont want to be in that stage so that phase doesnt deserve any definition. Choosing in love, falling in love, and being in love. Three phases of love.