Professional Documents
Culture Documents
Malays customs
Traditional attire
Dictated by Islamic dress code For men Baju Melayu For women Baju Kurung, Baju Kebaya and scarf (head-covers)
1) Children or younger people are strictly bound by custom to look upon their parents with respect.
Unquestioned loyalty and total obedience Demonstrated through daily conduct Parents have different expectations for their sons and daughters
2) Code of conduct beyond the family to recognise certain relationship between families in same neighbourhood
Make a social visit to the new household The spirit of mutual help (gotong-royong)
Can lighten the burden upon the family that is not very well off
5) Touching
Frowns upon physical contact between members of opposite sex, except in certain specific situation and depending on the relationship between the parties involved and also the age differences.
Betrothal Pre-wedding
The pre-wedding involves a meeting between the bride's and the groom's parents to determine the dowry that is to be given to the bride, as well as the date and venue of the solemnization. This could take place as early as a year in advance so as to allow ample time for making arrangements. The wedding is usually held on one convenient weekend so as to accommodate relatives who live far away. Prior to the wedding, the berinai or henna application ceremony is held. Dye from henna leaves is used to decorate the brides palms and feet. This is believed to bring good luck, fertility and to ward off evil. The pelamin or raised dais will be beautifully decorated for this purpose.
The kadhi will then confirm with the witnesses that the vow was clearly heard, after which he will lead the congregation with a prayer to conclude the ceremony and ask for blessings from God. The mas kahwin and hantaran or dowry are different. The small sum of the mas kahwin encourages marriage even among the poor, while the hantaran is more customary and may go into thousands of dollars, consisting of gifts of clothes, toiletries and even prayer mats (to signify their adherence to the religion) presented in intricate boxes or forms known as gubahan.
The arrival of the groom is heralded by the hadrah or tambourine troupe, consisting mostly of teenagers. They will beat the kompang or hand drums and sing Quranic verses and good wishes. The groom is often flanked by bunga manggar or palm blossoms carriers and a busload of relatives and friends. The mak andam or beautician, as well as members of the bride's family, will waylay the groom and ask for 'entrance fee'. Only when they are satisfied with the amount would they allow the groom to see his bride. After successfully overcoming the 'obstacles', the ceremony takes place.
The Bersanding or sitting in state ceremony consists of a pelamin or raised dais, prepared for the bride and groom, to represent their throne as they are treated as king and queen for the day. Relatives and guests who partake in this tepung tawar or blessing custom will anoint the couples palms with scented water, pandan potpourri and rice. These symbolize fertility.